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At home dinner dates?

My friend Jeff was offended that a woman he asked over to his house for a first date declined his offer. She has known him for months but they only started dating a couple of weeks ago. She told him she was not comfortable having a date at his house.

I can understand why she feels that way. When you invite someone over to your house, it sets things up for a certain level of intimacy. For a lot of women, we have to work up to that point. Not everyone is itching to going all domestic and nestling during those house dates.

Jeff thinks she just wants him to spend money on her and take her out. I’m sure that’s possible, but I would argue that this lady just knows what she wants and is fine with waiting to the appropriate time to go to a man’s house. Should she be penalized for that? Cut her some slack!

What do you think? When is the right time to invite someone over to your house? When someone asks you to a “at home” date, does that mean they are in to you? Does it always mean they are going to try and make a move towards physical intimacy?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

224 comments Add your comment

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
10:54 am

That’s why I believe in saying grace and blessing my food before I eat. You just never know what lurks beneath.

disco

September 12th, 2012
10:57 am

S/H – if I can make it happen I’m going to meet up with some folks in sao Paulo early next year.

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 12th, 2012
10:59 am

I’ve wanted to go to Rio, I need to get that ticket and visa an go on :-)

Willie Dynamite

September 12th, 2012
11:05 am

Rio sounds great. I’m wondering with the Olympics there in 4 yrs will the rates get better or worse.

disco

September 12th, 2012
11:16 am

looks like today is going to be a very slow day. is anyone here at all?

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 12th, 2012
11:24 am

WD, you know they will get worse,

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:26 am

I wonder if Jeff is reading along today at the responses? I sometimes wonder, when Diva drops the scenarios of “friends”, if they’re advised to read along to see the outcome. Just wondering.

Bluzgirl

September 12th, 2012
11:26 am

I’m here. Not much going on, other than being stressed because a benefit concert I’m planning is only 2.5 weeks away and still have lots of work to do!

Lady~favor ain't fair! :-)

September 12th, 2012
11:35 am

present what is going on crew?!?

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:37 am

Lady – Just chilling (said like Bro Man from the fif flo, holding up fo fingas) :)

Poppa Grande

September 12th, 2012
11:39 am

Rio gets the world cup in 2014 before the Olympics 2016. They basically get a practice run.

Sorry C, but one sports thing must be noted: The ACC getting the Notre Dame to join is B.I.G. for the ACC even if ND football is staying independent. As long as they get money from NBC that they don’t have to share, they won’t join a conference in football.

disco

September 12th, 2012
11:39 am

celisea – bruh/bro man has always been one of my tv crushes. old sexy self. of course that’s not saying i’m checking for a hungry cat burglar/home invader or nothing like that.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:40 am

PG – Have at it…lol At least it will break the silence. I can’t complain. No one else is speaking.

Lady~favor ain't fair! :-)

September 12th, 2012
11:42 am

lol C~ messy is the word of the day today! #random lol chill on sis~ ;)

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:42 am

disco – But what you’ve described as your type, I can see that. As soon as I hear the news of the Duncan dude passing, you was there first person that poppe din my head. You like em big and burly :mrgreen: I like fine and a bit smaller framed. I don’t want no vienna sausage of a man. But not big and burly. I likes ‘em tall :mrgreen:

Poppa Grande

September 12th, 2012
11:43 am

BTW, Rio was great went I saw single. I am not as excited to go with the wife. I know that it sounds bad for me to say that.

She really wants to go, so we will. I always think of Rio when I watch Boomerang and hear Strange’ talk about the essence of sex (when she places her panties on someone’s head and they get passed down the boardroom table). That is Rio for me.

Also, it is hard to believe that this year marks Boomerang’s is 20th anniversary.

disco

September 12th, 2012
11:43 am

PG – I’m not a football person either but things are just slow enough right now that if someone started a game of touch/flag football I might get in the game.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:44 am

Lady – LOL Just call me Bro Man (from da fif flo).

I use to carack up at him and Hustle Man. The pizza he sold for what 25 dollars or something like that and it was a personal pan pizza…lololol

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:45 am

“by” not but

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:46 am

Can I post a random without it coming off as “ratchet?” I’m NOT having a good underware day. There are suppose to be boyshort.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:46 am

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:47 am

dernit…they’re

disco

September 12th, 2012
11:48 am

C – you right because I did like Michael Clarke Duncan. sure did. I recently watched they call me sir where he played sirr parker’s football coach.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:50 am

Annnnnnnnnd, the remodeling of my home is about to start. We postponed, first because of going on vacay and I didn’t want to my home in dissarray while gone. The day returning from vacay by brother scored a HUGE job in which he’s still working alongside two smaller wins. So lil sis took a back seat so he wouldn’t miss out on any money making business. But hopefully, the end of the month :mrgreen: I’m stoked. My home will be so comfy and “what I want” by the time the holidays roll around.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:51 am

disco – He should have been your man!

Willie Dynamite

September 12th, 2012
11:57 am

I can see Disco with bruh man but not Michael Clark Duncan. I think he cried in the movie Green Mile. I don’t think that was on the approved list of acceptable crying. Lol

Lady~favor ain't fair! :-)

September 12th, 2012
11:57 am

Go C~ you are at your prime~ Enjoy your rewards!

disco

September 12th, 2012
11:59 am

celisea – you crazy. of course I just had a crazy vision of me and omarosa going at it. that might not have been a good look.

WD – you crazy. I’ll accept tears for money just can’t have no random A, no good reason tears. lol.

C – what you doing to your house? I’ve got no projects on the horizon (knock on wood). do have another high light bulb out but not up to calling old boy to change it. just not feeling him right now.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
11:59 am

Lady – I’m so stoked right about now….thanks! My brother is pretty top notch. He’s excited as well. I think more so to do the job over making the money…lol

I can see dicso with Bro Man, Ving Rhames, MC Duncan…all of ‘em. I just think a dude that big would be in my way. You know? I’m sure they call can/could bench press their women…lol Just a lil bit too big for my taste.

i'm swiss

September 12th, 2012
12:00 pm

C — It’s a message from the universe: “Go commando.” ;-)

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:02 pm

disco – hardwood floors put in (entire house), a couple of walls knocked down and revamped/closed, a new bath for me with a jacuzzi (that was his idea), a bathroom put in my kid’s room. Those are the primary things. A new bed for me (maybe the kid…we’ll see), and for what’s left money wise, he’s got a couple of ideas for the kitchen.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:02 pm

Swiss – I didn’t want to be ratchet but I almost posted, miserable too much longer and they’re coming off…for the rest of the day :)

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:03 pm

I have too much furniture in my room, so I’m getting rid of all of it. My sister asked for it. I want only one or two pieces. So, I’ll see what I can get tossed in with a new bed…lol Oh and another flatscreen.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:04 pm

disco – Call buddy to change your lightbulb. It could get interesting…lol

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:06 pm

disco – I believe Omarosa might have been a good match for you…lol I like her though

disco

September 12th, 2012
12:07 pm

as for it getting interesting around the changing of the bulb – which part of I’m not feeling him right now did you not understand. it’ll get interesting all right when I kick the ladder out from under him (after he changes the bulb of course).

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:10 pm

which part of I’m not feeling him right now did you not understand.

Whoa, doggie…it ain’t that serious…lol Get a stepladder and don’t mention it no more here. You was hankering to get laid Monday so a lay is a lay when you’re a hankering, or so I thought, according to you and your standards :mrgreen: Now, if you’re tryna be all selective then shush your mouth about it from now on and just let us know after it happens.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:10 pm

ooops, didn’t mean to bold all

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:13 pm

disco – I ain’t your coworkers or family members…lol You don’t a pass with me :mrgreen:

Lady~favor ain't fair! :-)

September 12th, 2012
12:16 pm

O_o oh my C~ lol funny! smh

disco

September 12th, 2012
12:18 pm

dag C – the which part didn’t you understand wasn’t a blow. it was just a comment. lol. as for getting in where you fit in, it doesn’t apply to him. at this point giving him some would be settling.

disco

September 12th, 2012
12:19 pm

oh. and C – don’t be trying to take it out on me because your panties are all in a bunch. lol.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:19 pm

disco – Whatever floats your boat. Just tell me about afterwards :mrgreen:

Lady~favor ain't fair! :-)

September 12th, 2012
12:19 pm

i am trying to finish up something then I am coming to play! you would think lol *pay me no mind* lol

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:20 pm

disco – LOLOL…your 12:19 A bunch, how about lost???

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:21 pm

Lady – At least you’re working. I’m about to get on something. I can’t have stuff rolling up on me at the last minute.

disco

September 12th, 2012
12:24 pm

please don’t tell me you done came up out your draws at work? now that’s funny.

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:26 pm

I almost took them off earlier. If I do, they’re getting trashed. If I want thongs, then I’ll buy thongs. If I boyshorts, they better act accordingly…lololol

i'm swiss

September 12th, 2012
12:29 pm

C — In a show of solidarity with you, my blog sis, I too have eschewed my drawers. Now I’m freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Free baaaaaaallin’

:lol:

Celisea

September 12th, 2012
12:31 pm

I just “breathe” better with cotton versus commando, so I hate to chuck ‘em….lol

Swiss – Standing together across the miles, hand in hand (cheek to cheek), they’re off!!