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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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We are never getting back together

Leave it to Taylor Swift to write a perfectly titled break up song. The thought of getting back together really does not work for everyone. When we consider the dating experiences that were “character building” as my Dad says, we have to know when it is really over.

It is important to remember that no matter how many right things some of our exes say, reuniting with them is a bad idea. I always say that you can love someone but not have to be with them. It is possible to be bad for each other!

Do you have an ex that you are absolutely sure about why you are no longer together? There was no need for closure or continued friendship. Things are so over, you can never go back. Do you think they feel the same way about you?

Have you ever told someone that you could never be with them again? If that is how you feel, do you think it is good to tell someone that to their face? How much honesty should we have in a break up?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

173 comments Add your comment

kimmie

September 5th, 2012
11:31 am

Single – I know he says to himself “I really dodged a bullet there!!” And you know, we all can be a little in denial when we really want something, but she really sounded crazy!

Leggs

September 5th, 2012
11:31 am

She kept calling him a jerk because if he had feelings for her he wouldn’t be acting like he is now. She didn’t step into psycho, she was dipped in it!!!

Bluzgirl

September 5th, 2012
11:35 am

I just wanted to smack her…

You know…it can be hard to be honest in the beginning about some things, but if a relationship is meant to be, then the other person will accept whatever it is you need to tell them…

Bluzgirl

September 5th, 2012
12:20 pm

Too quiet on here today…

For some reason, I am full of major anxiety today! I hate this feeling. I just have so much going on personally and professionally. I’m feeling very ADD and jittery today. Ugh!

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
12:36 pm

Bluz, slow down! also it’s not hard to be honest, if you don’t feel like sharing it, just say you don’t, but don’t lie about it.

Bluzgirl

September 5th, 2012
12:40 pm

S/H – This anxiety just hits some days. I’m working on a big show the end of this month and realizing how much I have to do!!! I always take on a little too much.

Sometimes, you have to share things from the beginning to be fair to the other person. I have to say that it really hurt me when my ex told me that he fell in love with the person he thought I was. He didn’t know about my “issues” until a few months in. He even said this in the end and I told him that once he found out who I really was, then he should have left if he didn’t like it. I’m pretty open now about the mental things I have to deal with. It can hurt me or help me. I just never want to hear the words again that my ex said to me. I’d rather be up front and even give you some tips on what to do when I get certain ways. :-)

Bluzgirl

September 5th, 2012
12:43 pm

Not only do I share it to prevent that from happening again, but I’m involved in an organization that is trying to reduce the stigma of mental illness. I used to be ashamed and hide it, but now, I’m an open book about it and have had several people come to me and thank me for being open and it encouraged them to be open…

Leggs

September 5th, 2012
12:43 pm

Many don’t get the fact that they should let the other person make an informed decision going forward from the facts presented to them. Omission isn’t good when one is assessing whether to nuture the relationship or walk away from it.

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
12:44 pm

Bluz , the person he thought you were, I’ve found that if you keep your mouth shut, and your eyes open, and your ears muffled, you’ll learn everything you need to know about a person without ever asking a question. I’f you’ve got to give tips, is this really the type of person you want to deal with?

Lady~sharpness is > than smartness

September 5th, 2012
12:45 pm

Howdy MIA

Today’s headliner says it all~

O/T: NFC EAST BATTLE 2NITE!! G-MEN PLEASE CRUSH ROMO & DEM COWGIRLS!!! #LOL HAPPY NFL SEASON FOR REAL! preseason lasted forever lol~

sigh with today and getting over the hump……lol

Bluzgirl

September 5th, 2012
12:47 pm

That’s true…I would tell my ex certain things that would help me when I was having a panic attack or in a really deep depression and he never made use of them. He would tell me that I had to figure out how to handle it. I look back and ask myself “why did I stay so long?”

Leggs – you are right about that! It can be hard to sit back and wait for the other person to process the information and make a decision…

Leggs

September 5th, 2012
12:55 pm

“It can be hard to sit back and wait for the other person to process the information and make a decision…”

Hard? Really? What’s too long in your book for them to come to a decision?

Bluzgirl

September 5th, 2012
1:02 pm

I guess it’s hard to sit and wonder if you’re being judged when being judged is very difficult to deal with. I’d rather a decision be made quickly on whether or not a relationship should be pursued than to be strung along. It just stinks when you’re rejected when you’ve been honest.

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
1:07 pm

Bluz when you’re in a relationship, you’re always being judged, and most of the time you’re not being strung along, it’s a learning process, and it takes time to learn who a person is, not just off one instance.

Into the Light

September 5th, 2012
1:39 pm

Marco…….. :)

LOL@Bluz and the irony of her being the one wanting to shake someone (i.e. the “radio” girl)….. Did you want to call and ask, “Are you hearing us????” :lol: :lol:

OAN: Stamps, I am leaving early today. My body has had it. It’s like, “Nope. You either gonna go home and rest or I’m gonna take you out.” That’s what I’m imagining it saying after I nearly passed out a few moments ago. #%^)% on being sick!

shlomo

September 5th, 2012
1:40 pm

why would you want to get your tongue pierced?

Sassy Me...Feeling a wild hair... :-)

September 5th, 2012
1:43 pm

O/T: NFC EAST BATTLE 2NITE!! G-MEN PLEASE CRUSH ROMO & DEM COWGIRLS!!! #LOL HAPPY NFL SEASON FOR REAL!

Pardon me Ms. Lady?! That is how it’s NOT going down tonight…I hope :lol:

My brother would be crushed….he’s been a Dallas fan since he was a young ‘un…

SlimUno

September 5th, 2012
1:46 pm

Wooooow just two pages folks!…oh well, Howdy Doody peeps. Are we talking football again now?

And hellerrrr

Lady~sharpness is > than smartness

September 5th, 2012
1:48 pm

Sassy I am beating you 1-0 about to be 2-0 sis! may the Giants stomp on~ lol

Lady~sharpness is > than smartness

September 5th, 2012
1:49 pm

Sassy my boo is harassing me now about these effin cowgirls LOL he needs to give Eli his props as he beats Romo down ALL the time! lol smh! a house divided tonight over wings and beer! ha

Into the Light

September 5th, 2012
1:50 pm

@Slim: You got a poem or a skit or sumthin’ to liven it up???? (fingers crossed)

Leggs

September 5th, 2012
1:53 pm

Sassy ~ those wild hairs seem to sprout about every 3 mos (lolol).

Robert

September 5th, 2012
1:55 pm

“We are never getting back together”

Men never have that option. I have known women who will get mad at you one minute and make passionate love to you the next day (make-up sex). I had relationships with women and after the affair ended we are still good friends. There is no need for aynomosity. In fact most older women (40-50) would prefer to date a man who was a lover and friend in the past and knows her likes and dis-likes rather than take a chance on someone new. Because they have a history together things just might work out well the 2nd time around..

Leggs

September 5th, 2012
1:56 pm

I know you’re thankful you have someone to help you pull them out. I’m cracking up…

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
1:59 pm

ITL keep your contagious self at home!!

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:03 pm

Why am I caracking up at Robert’s post?? We all have options….lol

In fact most older women (40-50) would prefer to date a man who was a lover and friend in the past and knows her likes and dis-likes rather than take a chance on someone new.

Hmmmm, I don’t know about this. But, okay.

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:04 pm

For the sake of avoidance and running from deja vu, imma have to disagree, Robert.

Lady~sharpness is > than smartness

September 5th, 2012
2:05 pm

C I know this lady who married someone recently she dated 25 years ago and boy is there a story of familiarity with them! 0_o #options lol

Robert

September 5th, 2012
2:06 pm

@Celisea – “wanting more of a bang out of life ”

Whenever you are ready the “BIG” Bang is here and ready for you. lol

Lady~sharpness is > than smartness

September 5th, 2012
2:06 pm

meant limited options per se~ lol

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
2:06 pm

C, he was right about one thing, it’s usually not over until the woman says it’s over, cause you know we always thinking with the wrong head (LOL)

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:07 pm

Lady – Girl, unless we’ve both changed and evolved over the years/time, that’s just hitting the repeat button….IMO…lol Almost like saying “oooooo, you know me so well”, mmm hmm, I sure do. PASS!

In all seriousness, I wouldn’t say people can’t reignite, I’d be lying if I said there was a hardline there and dead set against it, but if both parties didn’t learn something and change, then yeah, history is gonna repeat itself….lol

Leggs

September 5th, 2012
2:08 pm

I’m sitting here thinking the same thing, Celisea. Not so sure about that.

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:09 pm

Robert – Whenever you are ready the “BIG” Bang is here and ready for you. lol

LOLOLOLOL…..I am ca-racking up. Thanks Robert, that was the laugh of the day for me :mrgreen:

Single and Happy – You/y’all have options, y’all opt to give it one more go, per that other head…lol

Into the Light

September 5th, 2012
2:09 pm

Dang, Stamps. I’m leaving soon….. why you gotta be mean to the sick girl? :(

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:10 pm

Leggs – Everything gets dumped on the women over 40 category. Just all loose and willy nilly and anything goes…lol

Lady~sharpness is > than smartness

September 5th, 2012
2:10 pm

digressing C~ lol you see my point! lol

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
2:10 pm

I recently meet back up with a ex or 23 years, after 2 weeks of conversation, she was saying she should have married me, and i was thinking now I remember why I left you then. Talk about familiarity (LOL)

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:11 pm

Lady – Yes ma’am….clearly…lol

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
2:12 pm

ITL get well soon, have to put some of that tough love on ya

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
2:14 pm

C the other option is to go somewhere and hope I get some, that’s the top head talking, the bottom head is saying fool why you going to do that when you know you can get some there.

When you leave the top head is said, why the hell did I do that, but the bottom head is sing Lalalalal :-D

Leggs

September 5th, 2012
2:15 pm

I know Celisea. It’s like women over 45 are more willing to settle just to have someone to nestle up with. instead of being alone. No so. I bet demographically, a lot more older women don’t mind being alone. Having peace may not get them “sexed” up, but having peace may help them live longer and for some even happily.

Does that make sense?

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:16 pm

Single and Happy – I’m agreeing. I’m so glad God gave us women one head. That way we don’t struggle as much (I think) with being rational…lol Maybe HE just knew a woman with two heads would surely be double the trouble we already are…lol

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:17 pm

Leggs – Heck yeah. Peace of mind hands down.

Into the Light

September 5th, 2012
2:21 pm

@Stamps: Tough love….tequila….either way. :lol:

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
2:22 pm

Peace of mind trumps peice of a$$ anytime :-D

Celisea

September 5th, 2012
2:23 pm

Single and Happy – Agreeing again. Of course, you’re telling your age by saying that…lol

Single and Happier "Life Happens!"

September 5th, 2012
2:23 pm

ITL you need some gin and honey :-)

Lady~sharpness is > than smartness

September 5th, 2012
2:23 pm

who is Stamps?!? I missed that lol

Bluzgirl

September 5th, 2012
2:24 pm

ITL – go getcha a hot toddie (sp?) – I promise it will help you feel better!!!