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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Dating: Why Are You Single?


Hello lovelies! Since I am pretty much having a horrendous week in the office, I have asked my Wonder Twin (seriously we are, we share the same birthday and we are both dating bloggers!) to guest blog today. Brittany Manson aka Miss Alone in Atlanta wants to discuss that oh so lovely question we ALL have been asked WAY too many times, “Why are you single?” (*insert eyeroll*)

Every now and then (more now than then) when I meet a guy, I’m posed with the question “Why are you single”? I like many women across America CRINGE at this question! What are you supposed to say that won’t make you sound crazy, picky, desperate, lonely, needy, vulnerable, sneezy, dopey, bashful, grumpy….ok well maybe not those last few.

Most of the time when I get this question, the way it’s posed almost sounds like you have a disease, like the underlying tone of the question is saying something’s wrong with you because you’re….dare I say it…..SINGLE! A lot of times women will get on the defense when asked and answer that they are single “by choice” (even though that might not be the case) leaving guys to think they’re not looking for anything serious.

My smart self began to answer with “I’m single for the same reason you are”. A guy countered my response one day with “so you have bad taste in women too?” I said “Yup! That’s why I don’t date them.”

So today I ask to the guys: Do you ask this question when meeting someone and why? Ladies: Do you like or dislike this question and why? Ladies: How do you usually answer this question when asked?

By Brittany Manson, Guest Blogger for Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

331 comments Add your comment

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:27 pm

Lady – Gurrrrl, you need to find that day and give it a read. That was the first time I got a good laugh from him.

ITL – Thanks!

Comon Cents – I’m just going to read and “cosign” with the right the direction the wind take on crazy male/female scenarios…lolololol

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:29 pm

Nothing stirred that day. The thought of “firehose” action makes me ache a little and run…lolololol

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:30 pm

smh! off the chain!

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
2:37 pm

That’s one of those where when she don’t come back from her “birthday weekend” imma write ID channel and put that out there for the “Dates From Hell” show.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:39 pm

lol CC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! why my tv stay on that station lol I love case studies!

disco

August 16th, 2012
2:39 pm

CC – and since I’m not feeling generous I’ll use my old standby and say she gets what she gets. heck, it almost shouldn’t even qualify as a date from hell. a date from hell catches you off guard. a fool pulling a gun on you and then taking you on a trip that you don’t return from is almost predictable.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
2:42 pm

:lol: @ Disco & Lady. That’s almost one of those where you see that ish coming and you just can’t look away. Like watching a train wreck. SMDH…

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:43 pm

last night I watched Who the Bleep did I Marry! I felt sorry for that lady~ smh

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
2:44 pm

@CC: You sure they’re not going to Aruba?? (sorry…couldn’t resist)

Firehose….I think I said it that day, but I will say it again – that is TOO MUCH of a good thing. I don’t want a man on the TWPS, but a firehose? Naaaah.

disco

August 16th, 2012
2:44 pm

stupid ho.

whew y’all. my ghetto is coming down on me real hard. I’ve been trying to take the edge off by watching some of my favorite hood movies but it’s not doing the job.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:46 pm

disco – We talked about it before. You can ALWAYS get that chick off the company property and give the beat down that I can smell happening…unless one of y’all transfer or quit…lol

Yeah, I have no problem “enjoying” a good thing but too much of anything only turns to bad.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:47 pm

I’ve only seen a couple of episodes of Who the Bleep Did I Marry? I can’t watch that kind of stuff too much.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:49 pm

Yeah, I have no problem “enjoying” a good thing but too much of anything only turns to bad.<<<<<<<<<Yup!

disco

August 16th, 2012
2:53 pm

C – as was mentioned earlier, I’m a bit attached to those credits that are made to my account on the regular. I want to take old girl out but I won’t jeopardize the ducketts to do it. it’s all good though. no job is forever. sooner or later one of us will be leaving and it will be on. I know you all don’t know me but I’m sure you have detected that I can hold a grudge. I’ll check her A two years from now for ticking me off today. lol. still it’s awful hard keeping my mouth shut some days. she did finally get the message to not speak to me if it didn’t have anything to do with work. she’d be asking me what I was doing for the weekend, for the holiday. is my son coming home. and I’d be looking her right in her eyes not saying a daggone word. I deserve some kind of anger management badge. when is the next blog award ceremony? I want some credit dangit.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:53 pm

Thanks again everyone for my Birthday shout-outs and salutations!!!!~ Enjoy your evening as I plan to do nothing but kick back and sip a cold one! :-) The simple things ROCK!!!! #peacefully

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:58 pm

disco sooner or later one of us will be leaving and it will be on

I feel you on wanting to straight snap and vendettas. Not to sound all hordy tordy but I’ve had a couple of incidents in my 15 year stretch where folks tried and tried…meant it for evil but it turned for good. Sometimes folks that undermine and spend their time planning and working and spinning that kind of evil, you have to wait for retribution. Indeed it’s coming. In my personal life, I’ve had it done to me. Not often but like I was saying yesterday, going blow for blow just pulls me in and stand me in the line-up to get what’s coming to me for partaking. Live and let live. Let folks do what they do, all the while you’re moving on, over and past it. I know it’s all cliched and stuff (that’s getting to be a favorite line of mine…lol), but living well and igging the hell out of folks sometimes works a bigger wonder than “get back.” My mama taught me that when it came to fast tail jealous heffas or when it came to my temper and learning how to sometimes let stuff slide and wait for payback to make it’s way back around to them on it’s own.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
3:00 pm

There is a point at which it is definitely too much. I mean, the canal is only so long; half of dude would be hanging out and that can’t be fun. :razz:

Also, it doesn’t matter if you have a Mont Blanc if you can’t write… ;)

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:02 pm

The ballplayer can’t even look me in my face. Not only did he try to screw me but the fantastic year I’ve had so far in light of all the crap he tried to dump on me….is payback enough. I work in peace now. Ain’t gotta smell his funky behind, ain’t gotta sit across he desk from him for meetings, ain’t gotta do conference calls, ain’t gotta talk to him. Ain’t gotta shut him down and tell him to stay on his side of the chaulk line. And why??? Cause he started battling with me and I let him swing in the air while I ducked (thanks mama) and he in essence knocked his own self out. Now? He’s walking around looking like umm fu fu and his numbers ARE BELOW THE THRESHOLD. Four months to get them numbers up. This ain’t no easy business we’re in.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
3:03 pm

she’d be asking me what I was doing for the weekend, for the holiday. is my son coming home

stanky ho: What kind of coffee do you like?
disco: The kind where I drink it and no one talks to me.

:lol: Have you ever noticed that when you dislike someone every thing they do annoys you? “Look at her over there. Breathing and everything.” LMAO!

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:03 pm

Comon Cents – To your 3:00 (cover your ears kiddies), I like all of it. Nothing hanging out. Gotta be a good fit, bodies to bodies touching. IJS!!

Don Giovanni

August 16th, 2012
3:05 pm

As a man, I don’t usually ask the question simply because why are you still single isn’t the issue. The real issue is what are you, as a woman, going to do about your situation, if it’s something you want to change. I want a woman who knows she isn’t the perfect specimen, or God’s gift to man, but is wise enough to know or seek to know her flaws, vulnerable enough to share them and courageous enough to change them. As long as she knows why she is single, I don’t need to know or care to know. I just need to have enough courage to trust her to make the best decisions for both our sake.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:05 pm

“Look at her over there. Breathing and everything.” LMAO!

LOLOLOLOLOL….Ballplayer!! I would call my sister and say I can’t stand his stankin, funky, ugly, musty, breathing self…lololol

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:07 pm

And if it’s too much to fit, cut it down or find another shaft!

Don Giovanni – I’m highly flawed. I LOVE your post.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:07 pm

Don Giovanni – Oh, and vice versa :)

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
3:08 pm

Don Giovanni That was a nice post! okay I am gone!!! C behave too!!!! lol lololol bye!

disco

August 16th, 2012
3:08 pm

yeah yeah yeah. celisea but all that goes against my personal style. I’m like if you mess with me, I mess with you back. and this is the trick that makes 20 personal calls a day. you know I have plenty of ammunition on her. one day, one day, one day.

CC – you shole right about that. but what bothers me most is not that the incident went down so much as I didn’t really get to address the incident with her directly. supervisor and hr both said not to sweat it but it’s just not my nature not to sweat it. I come from a place where you get in someone’s face and tell them to keep your name out of their mouth. it’s just eating me up inside that she got a “freebie”. wench.

y’all change the subject. I can stay worked up on something forever ever.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:09 pm

Bye Lady! I will :) Have lots of birthday fun :)

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:13 pm

Don Giovanni – You still around? I want to ask what you meant by a lady thinking she’s God’s gift or believing she’s the perfect specimen? Is that your perception or do you truly know that. Sometimes what’s perceived is not what’s always there. Have you gone deeper to know the lady below the surface? Just asking

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
3:15 pm

So, I’ll tell y’all about my stanky ho. She’s a client stealer. Which in my business is a huge no-no. You know, you get the referral from another client, but you happen to be out of the office on the day they drop in. She does a consultation and takes the client. Since we are an LLC, we are technically self employed. I don’t work for my firm, I bought in and work with them. So, I found out after the fact that chick had snaked like 3 of my potential clients from the client who referred them to me. Ain’t that some ish? And she’s one of them “damsel in distress” type females when it comes to the opposite sex. Ohhhh, she just burns me up! As my SIL says, she makes my a$$ itch.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:18 pm

Ass itch?

Mine is “makes my butt hurts”

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
3:21 pm

hurt not hurts

Adam

August 16th, 2012
3:28 pm

I am single because choose to be too, it puzzles me when you’re a part of social groups, why it seems to be a problem or you get accused off being selfish with your life. Just because Women out number men, doesn’t mean you have to, I just haven’t met any women that have proved any real value other than shaking their fanny, sure it looks nice but I need more than that.

disco

August 16th, 2012
3:31 pm

CC – is your s/o Jamaican? I only ask because all of my Jamaican friends say that.

I almost wonder if work would be work if there wasn’t someone there that you had to put up with. I don’t think y’all understand how serious I am when I say I don’t socialize/fraternize/schmooze any of that at work. I don’t go to lunch, attend parties/showers, I don’t meet folks for drinks. I come to work, do my work, go home. that’s it. I’m pleasant. I exchange basic greetings. I’m not all up in your mix. don’t get me wrong. I listen and pay attention but I don’t dig. I don’t care enough. a previous boss wrote on my performance review that I’m extremely private which can be mistaken as stand-offish but I’m always lauded for my ability to stay out of office gossip and politics etc. it burns me up that this chick in particular was obviously taking my silence for weakness. like I’ll try disco because she likely won’t say anything. that’s what burns me up.

anyway, I’ll be hitting up my neighborhood liquor store today for sure.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
3:46 pm

Nope. He is scraight out of the SWAT. :lol: Born and raised. On the someone you have to put up with note: No, I think I would be a work-a-holic if I didn’t have to encounter chick. I am very blessed to do someting that I love to do, therefore, it’s not work. If that stanky heifer wasn’t here, I would probably never leave. :lol:

Maccy Do Ro "Guuja the Troll"

August 16th, 2012
4:01 pm

I just don’t believe in sharing with that, that I have built for myself without a person showing some effort for it.

To SlimUno, my head is not in the Clouds, I admit my sins and faults, I don’t hide them in a closet like some demanding OOOooo it’s in the past leave it there (That’s a form of lying). So I am guessing you also Celeb worship since you obviously came to their defense. I just pray if you have a child they not idolize these false heros and think “Oh, well so in so can get away with it, so can I” this is the problem I have. To tell you the truth, I read an article a couple years ago of a star quarterback in texas who raped a cheerleader and instead of throwing his butt in jail and ending his career, they punished the cheerleader and threaten her Scholarship and career. And to put the icing on the cake, forced her to cheer for her rapist, this one reason why I despise Celebs. If that where my daughter, their would have been a second story “Crazed farther blows Star-Quarter backs head off with 12 gauge for getting away with raping his daughter” but someone like you sounds like you support what these celebs do. So if support them, you are just as guilty. And I would like to know a VERY good reason why those who live an American dream life-style deserve a second chance on such crimes, when you and I both know if it where us who did it we would be nailed to cross. So please enlighten me oh great one.

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
4:04 pm

:shock:

Nobody feed the animals. Please. Stupid a$$ got dusted yesterday and don’t even know it. smh….

Speaking of Slim, though, where did she go?

disco

August 16th, 2012
4:07 pm

maccy – where is your previous post? I’d like to get caught up before I start passing judgment. as for celebrity worship – I most certainly don’t worship celebrities but I’m also not for attempting to use one to make an example out of just because they are celebrities. when it comes to criminal justice the problem, in my opinion, isn’t “celebrity” so much as the entire criminal justice system is, for the most part, jacked up. there is no “fair trial” and this goes for confirmed criminals, celebrities and your average joe blow. countless folks are locked up and the lawyers, judges, prosecutors who locked them up know they didn’t have a darned thing to do with the crime they were convicted of. countless people are acquitted and there is very little doubt that they did it. don’t hate the players, hate the game.

ITL – sorry (about feeding the animals).

Single and Happy I knew I should have kept my $15 in my pocket!

August 16th, 2012
4:12 pm

Disco, if you feed them they won’t go away

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
4:14 pm

I don’t think about celebs unless one crosses the screen on the news or something. They seem worlds away. Anyhoo

disco

August 16th, 2012
4:16 pm

S/H – ain’t nobody else up in here right about now. if I had to consort with the animals then so be it. now, you and ITL popped up but if y’all dip out I’ll be sprinkling hot sauce on the animal food and pouring ice tea in their cups.

Single and Happy I knew I should have kept my $15 in my pocket!

August 16th, 2012
4:16 pm

Comon didn’t you see the sign, DON’T FEED THE TROLLS

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
4:16 pm

In all fairness to Maccy, I was condemned for calling newbies trolls. I would say, give Maccy a fair shake :) :) What’s good for the goose is good for the gander!

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
4:16 pm

@disco: That crazy mess posted yesterday afternoon. And comes in here today like no time has passed. Knucklehead probably had a reality break and just woke up thinking it’s still Wednesday. smh

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
4:17 pm

Now now now….EVERYONE deserves a right to blog :)

Single and Happy I knew I should have kept my $15 in my pocket!

August 16th, 2012
4:17 pm

I’m here for a few disco, at least until something else breaks down

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
4:18 pm

@C: If you had seen what it posted yesterday afternoon, I doubt you’d say that. There’s newbies, and then there’s trolls.

Single and Happy I knew I should have kept my $15 in my pocket!

August 16th, 2012
4:18 pm

Comon blogging is one thing but where did the you worship celebs come from?

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
4:18 pm

Comon didn’t you see the sign, DON’T FEED THE TROLLS

Comon ain’t in here right now

disco

August 16th, 2012
4:21 pm

y’all sing the mister ed song. “a troll is a troll, you know, you know”. lol. forgive me. it’s been a long day.

Single and Happy I knew I should have kept my $15 in my pocket!

August 16th, 2012
4:21 pm

that was meant to me come on!!