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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Dating: Why Are You Single?


Hello lovelies! Since I am pretty much having a horrendous week in the office, I have asked my Wonder Twin (seriously we are, we share the same birthday and we are both dating bloggers!) to guest blog today. Brittany Manson aka Miss Alone in Atlanta wants to discuss that oh so lovely question we ALL have been asked WAY too many times, “Why are you single?” (*insert eyeroll*)

Every now and then (more now than then) when I meet a guy, I’m posed with the question “Why are you single”? I like many women across America CRINGE at this question! What are you supposed to say that won’t make you sound crazy, picky, desperate, lonely, needy, vulnerable, sneezy, dopey, bashful, grumpy….ok well maybe not those last few.

Most of the time when I get this question, the way it’s posed almost sounds like you have a disease, like the underlying tone of the question is saying something’s wrong with you because you’re….dare I say it…..SINGLE! A lot of times women will get on the defense when asked and answer that they are single “by choice” (even though that might not be the case) leaving guys to think they’re not looking for anything serious.

My smart self began to answer with “I’m single for the same reason you are”. A guy countered my response one day with “so you have bad taste in women too?” I said “Yup! That’s why I don’t date them.”

So today I ask to the guys: Do you ask this question when meeting someone and why? Ladies: Do you like or dislike this question and why? Ladies: How do you usually answer this question when asked?

By Brittany Manson, Guest Blogger for Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

331 comments Add your comment

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
1:30 pm

I will say this, the kid’s mom is young and she’s got three little ones…bad choices. She’s trying to get light together (yay for her), just landed a pretty descent job. But, when you breed with hoodlums, likely that’s what you’re going to have. Y’all hear me talking about my kid’s got her dad in her veins??? She’s not a hoodlum or heathen but she’s him….alllll the way…lol Anyhoo, the one thing I think she’s doing wrong is rather than have patience with him, she just wacks him and yells at him. He’s young enough to be sent to the corner and it have an effect on him. Make him sit it out sometimes, rather than resorting to just wacking him. Not saying totally eliminate but he’s a tough piece of leather and she’s going to have a run the next few years with him.

ITL – Well, slide me CC’s bus card cause I might catch a case myself.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
1:30 pm

Re: Fred Tokars

I actually lived rigt around the corner from their neighborhood when that happened. On a hppier note, their oldest has graduated from college and is working out in CA and th youngest is in college now in FL.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
1:30 pm

life not light

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
1:32 pm

I need food…guess I’ll head to lunch. For some reason, my appetite has hit an all time low.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
1:33 pm

OK. I definitely need the wooosawww moment right now. Can’t type to save myself today. :lol:

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
1:34 pm

For some reason, my appetite has hit an all time low.

Thinking about that little heathen took your appetite. :lol:

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
1:35 pm

Comon Cents – That was funny…lol Usually I’m eatamopolis (yeah, another name from my brother) but I dunno, I’ve skimmped on meals lately. Not really hungry. I’m SURE it will pass. I LOVE to eat. :)

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
1:38 pm

I cosign on the breeding with hoodlums thing. I have an acquaintance who has 5 little heathens with the ex (one set of twins) all under the age of 9. She’s aight, but the baby daddy? He was bad news from day one. And the boys (did I mention all 5 are boys?!) definitely take after their father. She gonna have her hands full. The youngest got put off the bus in kindergarten on the 3rd day of school! Awww, Heyall naw!

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
1:38 pm

chuckle~~~~~

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
1:43 pm

@CC: Maybe you should just put a stack of business cards in the blog lobby…. I got a feeling if Gollum doesn’t quit emailing me and coming by my office I’m gonna need your services.

Off the bus in kindergarten??? On the third day of school??? What the French? :shock:

cba

August 16th, 2012
1:44 pm

Hey Lady~it’s good to read your positive vibes….hope you have a good school year. Is grad school complete?

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
1:47 pm

Oh my, off the school bus??? Lawd I’m sooooo glad my run is almost done. Thank ya Jesus!

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
1:47 pm

Hi cba!!!!! Thanks sir as always~ I finished my last class this week. I now have a 10 month practicum and just praying for a 2nd shift placement bc I am not quitting my day job. I am positive things will fall in place as I know I didn’t come this far to not end successfully~ Thanks for always asking and your support! I accomplished a major goal with finishing the coursework~ :-)

Exiled!

August 16th, 2012
1:51 pm

Low appetite Cel? explain and elaborate…u wish it was high,need a female viag or u talking belly food appetite? :lol:

Now as for security and disrobing…I could tell u and give uall a play by play of what I’m observing as fas people go: I’m in line right and a nice middle aged lady is in from of me…we talking she looking real sharp stiletto nice dress suit(skirt and jacket) sharp……I’m thinking Right?!

Untill she has to disrobe …first shoes and I’m looking since she’s a step ahead…
Eweeeeeh….ugly feet! I’m saying…real jacked up toes looking agggggh…ok I say next

Now she takes off jacket and she has a top…Michelle Obama sleeveless type…..she raises her arms….

Eeeeew….a while black bush under those armpits

I shake my head..clear security and me her…
after she re-robes….

Have a safe flight! :lol:

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
1:52 pm

Ex is a fool!!!!!!!!!! LOL!

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
1:53 pm

ITL~ Who is gollum? (I know the one from LOTR but I mean on the blog)

Re: getting put off the bus~ Apparently he got into a fight with a 2nd grader but he started it so they put him off the bus.

Lady~ Great birthday gift to be done with grad work. You couldn’t pay me to go back to school at this point. :lol: Continuing Ed is bad enough.

Exiled!

August 16th, 2012
1:54 pm

In the line…

Exiled!

August 16th, 2012
1:56 pm

A whole black bush

Typos on IPhone. Aghh

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
1:56 pm

10 First Dates Mistakes….Seems everyone is a relationship expert these days…..lol

Location, Location, Location! – Absolutely no first dates in the living room, yours or his. This sends the wrong message to a man. It tells him that you are entirely too comfortable too soon. If you spend the first date on his couch, where will you spend the second?

What Time IS It? – Grandma said it best, “Ain’t nothing open after a certain time but legs.” The later the hour the more relaxed you become making it especially hard to pay attention to detail, which is imperative on a first date. Also, dates earlier in the day allow for more flexibility. For example, if you hit it off you may want to add another activity to the date that wasn’t originally planned.

Clothes are Necessary. – Men are visual. The first thing we see often determines the first thing we think. So, remember to dress appropriately. Yes be sexy! But don’t let it all hang out. Leave something for the imagination; guessing is good as it adds to a man’s intrigue.

No Job Interviews. – “Where do you work?” “How much do you make?” “What are your future plans?” No one likes to be bombarded with a ton of questions during a first encounter. Cultivating conversation and listening intently will reveal everything that you need to know about him.

Attitude. – Believe it or not men are often nervous on first dates, so smile, be approachable. He is busy trying to make a good first impression, so throw him a bone [unless, of course, he’s a dog.]

Don’t get too cozy. – Refuse to be blinded by his charm and your attraction to him. Don’t become too comfortable. No sensual touching or hugging and cuddling on the first date. Men will often test you in this to see how far they can get which we, at times, use to measure how easy it will be to get you in bed.

Marriage!? Yikes! – Take it easy. Too serious and intimate of a conversation can potentially scare him off. Slow walk it (him).

Let’s Talk About Sex. – Just not on the first date. Your conversation tells a lot about where your mind is, revealing a piece of your character. Men observe this and act accordingly. Conversation goes a long way in creating the perceptions of the mind. Remember that.

Insecurities. – Insecurity is either a turn on or a turn off, either way you lose. It is important to be sure of yourself and to project that. Confidence is contagious but the absence of it cannot be hidden. Be confident in who you are! Real men find that sexy!

Go Home…..Alone! – We are all adults and have the right to do what we please with our bodies, but when looking to establish a healthy relationship, sex on the first date is not the way to go. If you give him all of you on the first date, he has no incentive to pursue you how you truly deserve to be pursued.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
1:58 pm

CC it really is!!! It is a silent victory I am very proud of!!!! Grad school was a personal goal……….I knew I wanted my Masters and I set out to conquer it~ Thanks for understanding!

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
1:59 pm

Meelloo – Man I’m ca-racking up over here at you.

1st – Belly appetite. No fem viagra needed. I can think about something and my nether regions stir…noooo, no help needed there.

2nd – The rest of your “let down” on the chick in front of you was hilarious.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:00 pm

I got that info from an article of course~ rhetorical I know lol

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:01 pm

Where is Robert and Mike P and Jake?!? #curious

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:01 pm

Lady – Regarding the article the “what time is it” part. My coworker’s mantra is “nothing open after midnight but legs”

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
2:01 pm

@CC: “gollum” is my nickname for a guy at work who bears a striking resemblence to the LOTR character. :)

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
2:04 pm

Lady: Congratulations, Ms. Masters. :)

Love the list. I’ll be passing that one along.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:05 pm

Thanks ITL~

all night long C~ lol

cba

August 16th, 2012
2:09 pm

@Lady, GOOD NEWS, VERY GOOD NEWS. My daughter graduated in May but just finished her course work the last of July. Now, if she would just ease up off the fast pace……gotta get it done, right here, right now :-)

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
2:10 pm

~~~~ all night long….all night…all night long….yeah….~~~~

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:11 pm

Now, if she would just ease up off the fast pace……gotta get it done, right here, right now <<<<<<<<Love It cba!!!!!! I am soooooo NOT pressed to finished right this second (meaning the internship)~ I know things will fall in place…….Such great advice!!! Yeah I remember her graduating!!!

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
2:11 pm

Where is SWISS???

Quick, somebody say puddy or ta-tas. :lol:

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
2:12 pm

Love the list. I’ll be passing that one along.

cosign! :lol:

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:12 pm

Great, I received my service pin for 15 years about 5 months late. A few years back, at 15 years you would received a catalog with all kinds of neat stuff (FOR 15 YEARS), to chose from. Heck when it was five years you could order gold, art or crystal. Now it’s nothing but a stinking pin…lol

Guess I happy to be gainfully employed. Really, that’s for certain, no guessing here.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
2:13 pm

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
2:14 pm

Man, they should have at least got you a t-shirt that read “15 ears and all they got me was this lousy shirt” :lol:

But being gainfully employed is no joke in this economy.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:14 pm

yup C~ Happy 15! Have to toast to you soon sis~

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
2:15 pm

Damn, today it’s me missing the “y”…

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:17 pm

Lady – :)

Comon Cents – True, so true…lol I’m happy though with a regularly scheduled credit hitting my account every two weeks instead :)

We do still have a sight for all kind of high end stuff for going good stuff and folks telling you manager about the good stuff you’ve done

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:18 pm

site not sight

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:19 pm

where is the other guy Fion too?!?

disco

August 16th, 2012
2:21 pm

C – very long story but long story short – she started it. lol. she attempted to start some mess and throw me under the bus but when I managed to not get hit by the bus she came to me crying and blubbering and snotting and apologizing but I don’t play. she can kick rocks until her toenails fall off as far as I’m concerned. fat cow.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:22 pm

Lady – Fion is the self declared reigning King Dong. He ain’t gotta show up….lol Did you blog the day he said his hits the water when he takes a leak? That was funny as heck. Esp when he said others walk up and put it in, while he puts it in and then walks up. Hadn’t seen him around these parts since that day.

Celisea

August 16th, 2012
2:23 pm

disco – Oh, okay…rightfully so. I’ve been a victim many times….ask the ballplayer. I feel ya.

Comon Cents- just cosigning today...

August 16th, 2012
2:23 pm

Ok, y’all, a friend of my just called me and told me something that I must share with the blog because I am definitely having that “yous a stupid ho” moment. Another friend of ours had been dating this dude for about 2 months. She’s at dude’s house and dude goes through her phone. She has been texting with her ex (unbeknownst to dude. Nothing racy but nonetheless he was upset because he didn’t know) they get in an argument and dude pulls a gun on her. Police called, the whole 9. Flash forward to today (about a month later). Friend just called and told me chick is headed to FL with dude for the weekend for her birthday celebration. WTF?!? Who does that?

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:23 pm

0_o spits coke out LMBAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! smdh C!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
2:24 pm

Congratulations, C!

@Lady: I think he’s probably on some bridge testing to see how deep the water is. LOLOLOL Sorry, couldn’t resist; I’m not sure if you were here for his “firehose” claims.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:25 pm

CC wow @ these daily case studies! LOL smh To each their own~

Into the Light

August 16th, 2012
2:26 pm

Dang. Guess I should have refreshed before responding. LOL@C and me going right to the same page.

disco

August 16th, 2012
2:26 pm

CC – you answered your own question in your post. who does that? a stupid ho.

Lady~cool beans :-)

August 16th, 2012
2:26 pm

I promise I know nothing yall are speaking of! I don’t blog over the summer like that….but I am back playing catch up I see! wow @ all the antics too! lol