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Dating: The returning ex

There always seems to be one constant in our dating lives: the ex that won’t stay gone. It’s almost as if they have some kind of silent alarm that rings the moment we are completely over them. They show up and say the right things and suddenly we make a bad decision in a weak moment.

What is it about the one that resurfaces and makes us forget the reason we broke up with them? Is it ever a good idea to reunite with a former flame?

What would you do if your “one that got away” came back and seems to have changed? Do you give it another try or find a way to keep your distance?

Have you ever reunited with an ex and things turned out great? What do you think made the difference the second (third?) time around?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

236 comments Add your comment

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
2:26 pm

I’m a huge animal lover and when my oldest cat dies (my baby), I’ll be a total wreck! I’ve joked that I’d have to go into the mental hospital!!!

Since I’m an animal person, I feel like I need to be with another animal person. It showed me a lot when he felt comfortable enough to cry a little in front of me talking about his dog. It made me tear up…

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:26 pm

Leggs, how a man treats and loves his animals says a lot about his person. I spend 18 hours a day with my dogs, they love me unconditionally, would die right then-and-there for me – the good list is never ending of positive. Th

disco

August 14th, 2012
2:31 pm

I’m so not an animal lover. I’ll give a dog a little bit of respect (well at least a dog sized dog. those little squirrel sized dogs get no love) but cats get nada from me. I don’t understand the deal with city folks having outside cats. country, I get. city, I don’t. I swear if a dog runs in front of my car I’ll likely slow down or swerve to avoid it. a cat and I’m aiming for it.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

August 14th, 2012
2:32 pm

He don’t often drink beer, but when he do

Hills lay flat for him
Kings ask permission from him
Holidays take a day off for him
Trash takes itself to the landfill for him
Flat tires inflates for him
Paper writes poems to him
Chickens want to be eaten by him
Rain drops avoid him
Recipes cook dinner for him
Clothes want to wear him

Afternoon:

My take on the most interesting man in the world.

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:32 pm

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
2:37 pm

Back from Ross. Thank God those shoes were too tight across the toe, bc mami would have re-homed another pair. :lol:

Congrats to you and Lil Leggs, Leggs. :)

Heeeey WD, Slim, and Bluz. Glad y’all made it in.

@Bluz and never going back: Like I always say, there’s a reason the windshield is a lot bigger than the rearview mirror. ;)

WD: I don’t have Slim’s skills, but how about this:

Roses are red,
Peonies are pink,
Root for the Dawgs,
Cause your gators stink! ;)

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:38 pm

Disco, hahaaa. I’ll admit my well built squirrel (JRT) is so self entitled. My fault, but she’s my leisure dog. She’s obedient, but so self entitled.

My big dogs are so obedient, not self entitled, and everything a big dog should be. It’s funny at check-up/vacs., because here’s these massive guard dogs I own completely under control. I still have to take one dog at a time. Then I come in with this 15lb terrier whom is a terror. Everytime I reflect, it just cracks me up.

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
2:38 pm

Heeeey, BF! Clothes want to wear him. LOLOL

HST: TMIMITW I believe is short for The Most Interesting Man In the World

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
2:40 pm

HST – I agree with you about how a man treats animals says a lot about his character. My ex who recently passed away was such a gentle, good hearted man, and he took in just about every animal he found! He grew up doing that. When he died, I had to help find homes for 2 dogs, 3 cats, a rat, 3 snakes, 5 turtles, a tortoise, and a bird!!! He was a bit of a hoarder, but he LOVED all of his animals!

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

August 14th, 2012
2:41 pm

Hey Light, I’m running late but I got my drinks and it’s not beer.

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:43 pm

ITL, SMDH.

Bluz, agreed, it does show a lot about one’s character.

BF, whatyoudrinkinon?

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
2:43 pm

Hey ITL! I didn’t think I was gonna make it in today! After unloading all my aunt’s crap last night, I had to call in late to work. Didn’t get finished until midnight and I’m hurting all over!!!

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
2:44 pm

BF – I could use some hard liquor right now, but not sure what I have a taste for! :-)

disco

August 14th, 2012
2:44 pm

HST – I’m always the one tirading about folks and their dogs. just this past Sunday morning I go outside in shorts and a tank top to take out the trash. as I’m headed back in a neighbor opens the door and two nice sized dogs come charging at me. she calls them and one heads back and the other follows me. now this dog is walking around me/rubbing all up on my legs (just dying for affection but I don’t pet dogs and I don’t talk to dogs) and she’s calling and the dog is ignoring and I’m hoping the daggone thing doesn’t decide to jump up on me. not that I’m afraid but I should not have to be accosted by someone’s dog. it’s not cute. chick finally comes and gets the dog and I had to go inside and shower because I couldn’t sit around the house smelling like (or imagining I smell like) dog. eww.

Poppa Grande

August 14th, 2012
2:45 pm

Yes, the Most Interesting Man In the World is short. I didn’t know about the divorced part. However, he claims to be 5′9″. He is about 1 full foot shorter than me. He is a 73 year old dude. He was cool during our interaction, though.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

August 14th, 2012
2:47 pm

HST I’ll have a whiskey sour with a vodka and tonic on the side and keep ‘em running. Thank you sir.

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
2:48 pm

@BF: I’m having a vodka lemonade. Yum and yum. ;)

@Bluz: Epsom salts. I swear by them.

@HST: Why are you “SMDH”?

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:48 pm

Disco, that’s a proper assessment. People always question my dogs discipline. I say who’s gonna love them like I do? Do you have orthopedic beds for them? I say if a dog doesn’t recall it’s the owner’s fault and shortcomings. That owner was wrong, and as a proper dog keeper, I’d be mortified if my dog acted like that. My dogs don’t leave my yard, because they wouldn’t want to disappoint me, disobey me, or leave home. It is a two way street for my respect to be given to my dogs as well.

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
2:51 pm

ITL – yeah…I’m thinking I’ll soak in a nice hot bath when I get home from work! I think I have some epsom salt at home, but if not, I know I have some Dead Sea salt…I’m sure that will work nice also! I’m just thankful that I have some pain pills!!! If I didn’t, I’d be laid up in bed all day!

disco

August 14th, 2012
2:51 pm

bartender – I’ll have another. just vodka and midori this time. hold the pineapple juice. it’s diluting the liquor. by the way – are drinks on the house? am i running a tab? do i need to smile and sit next to some old lonely looking dude? let me know before i drink too much.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

August 14th, 2012
2:51 pm

Hey what’s up Big Poppa? You knwo the man too huh.

disco if you had the most interesting man on your arm, you wouldn’t have had to take that trash out and get dog/bum rushed.

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:51 pm

BF, I’m cleaning my crystal now for ya. Here ya go…

ITL, for not getting the acronym that was being used for most of the day spelled out.

I also use Epsom salts as well, I feel they help me recover more quickly from a serious work-out.

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:52 pm

TMIMITW, would have spoken to the dog before he left his yard, and told him to behave.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

August 14th, 2012
2:54 pm

Bluz sweet what ever you drink is my command.

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:54 pm

PG, you’ve met TMIMITW? I’ve read some of his accomplishments, and how they found him. I wanna have that swagger when I’m pushing 73…

disco

August 14th, 2012
2:56 pm

BF – how right you are. I don’t think I need THE most interesting man. I’m not greedy. I can get by with a moderately interesting man. and, btw, does the most interesting man do mundane house chores? is he not too busy being interesting?

where did everyone else go? a virtual AA meeting?

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:56 pm

Disco, the drinks are always on the house, no cheap basterds here…

HST

August 14th, 2012
2:57 pm

Disco, TMIMITW has elves that clean up secretly behind him.

disco

August 14th, 2012
2:58 pm

well in that case barkeep, leave the bottle, go serve that guy at the end of the bar and try not to notice me sliding the bottle into my oversized purse.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

August 14th, 2012
2:59 pm

LOL……@disco

I’m outta here y’all enjoy yourselves. Tomorrow is Friday. (well for me that is)

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
3:00 pm

I guess I’ll stick with my usual Captain Morgan and Diet Coke!

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:01 pm

Miss Disco, here’s a bottle for your leisure – here’s a drink for now.

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:02 pm

Arrrrggghhh, rum fer you miss – enjoy!

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
3:03 pm

a virtual AA meeting

….not me, disco. Those meetings are for quitters!

@Bluz: was drinking those on Saturday. With lime. :)

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:03 pm

Bluz, what do you do for work?

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
3:03 pm

Thanks a bunch!!!

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
3:04 pm

Night, BF! Lucky wolf. :)

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
3:06 pm

Hmmm…I don’t know why my post got eaten by the blog monster…

I’ve worked at a credit union for 14 years. You name it, I do it here. Customer service, loans, etc.

disco

August 14th, 2012
3:06 pm

HST – are you always this nice are our you still feeling all euphoric and whatnot?

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:08 pm

Nice. Do you do small business loans? I’m thinking of setting up a Blog Bar.

I’ve been with Delta Credit Union since the 90’s.

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:10 pm

Euphoric and whatnot is a proper assessment of my demeanor, but I am truly a nice guy – I pride myself in being a Southern Gentleman.

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:11 pm

…current demeanor…

Bluzgirl

August 14th, 2012
3:11 pm

LOL HST! We actually had to set up a company and join forces with other credit unions to get our business loans up and running! We’re kind of small, but been around for 60 years!

SlimUno

August 14th, 2012
3:14 pm

I can’t lie…that head got my mind like white powder on a table chopped into small lines, Gone…

I can’t lie…that puddy takes the cake, like momma would make when the universe was in line and all was well. When that puddy cake rise this diyk swells….

I can’t lie…I love the love you show me, the way you kiss me the way you hold me….and because your love transcends it will surely out grow me…

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
3:14 pm

I bank at credit unions. The customer service is SO MUCH BETTER! In my humble opinion, anyway…

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:16 pm

Slim, explain those statements…

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
3:16 pm

Dayum, Slim!! :) That was wonderful.

Into the Light

August 14th, 2012
3:17 pm

@HST: It’s poetry open mic night. Shhhhh….. now get me another drink. ;)

HST

August 14th, 2012
3:18 pm

ITL, it is. The only place I like better than Delta C.U. is JP Chase & Morgan. Those guys replaced my Centurion card with no annual fee, I have zero complaints, and they give me nice gifts. Unlike AMEX who charged me, made me spend 250K a year, and scrutinized where I spent my money.

disco

August 14th, 2012
3:19 pm

ITL – drinks are free. don’t come up in here talking to the bartender crazy. if he shuts it down it’s going to be me and you. now don’t get me wrong – we cool but don’t be messing up the rotation.

speaking of drinks – I need a real one. I’m getting closer and closer to telling somebody about themselves. I hate being in situations where you have to bite your tongue and hold stuff in. I’m a let it all out kind of girl.