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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Judging the book

Single people can find themselves scrutinizing each other for every little thing. The problem starts when we find random things to judge each other about. Sometimes we have to find out right away, exactly what the flaws are.

We think that is a way to improve our dating odds, but it can have the opposite effect. Women notice how men have too many female friends. Instead of thinking this as a positive thing, we assume he has slept with all of them. Men notice that a woman has a great career. Instead of thinking she is ambitious and capable, they assume she has no idea how to put someone else first.

Judging a book by it’s cover – we do it all the time, I don’t know if we even know when we do it. Do you think you have a problem judging people too harshly?

Have you ever felt that someone judged you and made assumptions about you?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

454 comments Add your comment

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
11:49 am

I’ve never been to a UGA game, but would LOVE to go. Hint…hint! :-) The GA/GA Tech game is always my bday weekend and I always tell people I would love tickets to go!

ITL…I’m so lucky that my best friend lives in Charleston, so I can go whenever I can afford the gas. This time, he’s going to help pay for the gas because I’m helping him move into a new house.

Also…as far as being loud during games…my ex was very surprised by me when we went out to a bar to watch a pay per view game. He hated football in the beginning. He would go outside and read during games, but as he could hear me yelling and either cussing or getting excited, he would slowly start coming inside to watch. By the end, he was yelling right alongside me!

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
11:52 am

@Bluz: We occasionally have extras. I’ll keep you in mind. Chances of extras for the GA/GA Yeck game, though, are slim and slimmer. The Ga. Southern game is the weekend before that, though, so we could do an early birthday.

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
11:53 am

Actually…I don’t mind going to ANY game. I just want to go and experience it. I was thinking about trying to get tix to the GA Southern game and get some friends to go, but they can’t afford to pay for their share. Please do keep me in mind!

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
11:55 am

I will! The first time you walk into Sanford Stadium will be a moment you will never forget. :)

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
11:58 am

I think I’d be like a deer in headlights! LOL!!!

SlimUno

August 9th, 2012
12:02 pm

Good morning…well, more like afternoon now. What’s happening peeps?

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:03 pm

LOL@Bluz.

Guess we better ixnay on the ootballfay talk. The non-football bloggers in the crowd have R-U-N-N-O-F-T! :roll:

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:03 pm

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:04 pm

I know, right?

SlimUno

August 9th, 2012
12:05 pm

S & H – You didn’t know what a CT was? I must’ve missed a lot yesterday. (haven’t had time to check out yesterday’s blog)

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:06 pm

One more thought about football…When I was 22ish, I dated a guy who was a big college football fan. He tought me all about the game. If I wanted to see him, we had to go to a sports bar where we could watch several games. I was not into it at all in the beginning, but I fell in love with the sport! I have always given him credit for preparing me for other men. The only downside is that the last couple of men I’ve been involved with are not at all interested in college football (or any other sport)!!! I don’t care…I’ll be tied down to the couch on Saturdays!

SlimUno

August 9th, 2012
12:08 pm

ITL – Hey chica! Too bad it isn’t Friday. I’m ready to get my drinking and relaxation on. Been a bit bummed last few days.

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:11 pm

It kind of feels like a Friday…

Single and Happy

August 9th, 2012
12:12 pm

Slim, no I didn’t but that was from a few days ago, I asked some of my co-workers and got the same reaction that I got on the blog (LOL)

Comon Cents

August 9th, 2012
12:12 pm

ITL~ Somehow, I don’t think that is the elephant that cleared the room, but moving on…

Bluzy~ If we ave a weekend that we are not going, I will definitely pass our tickets. Not the greatest seats (we’re in the 320’s), but still a great experience to have. Getting tickets to GA/GA Tech? You have a better chance of being married to Magnum by Halloween. :lol:

IDK that we are going to the Ga Southern game, so I will check with the hubby and if you and ITL wanna make an afternoon of it, I’ll pass our tickets.

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:13 pm

LOL CC! I would greatly appreciate you thinking of me with extra tickets also. I don’t care where the seats are…I just wanna go!

SlimUno

August 9th, 2012
12:13 pm

SH – Oh okay, good deal. Glad you are now up to speed. ;-)

Comon Cents

August 9th, 2012
12:13 pm

What is CT? I guess I’m in the same boat as Single.

Comon Cents

August 9th, 2012
12:14 pm

Slim~ Why you bummed?

Leggs

August 9th, 2012
12:16 pm

Dang, now people asking for vest colors to match their school colors.

Comon ~ Snapped is my show as well. I think my child is tired of me watching it. Well, I know she is because she came in the living and said “not again” and walked out.

My ex-husband’s sister is actually married to a guy that killed his first wife and served 23 years for it. When she married him I was like “Who the Eff does that?!?” I couldn’t sleep at night if I married that dude. Girl, I am with you on that one! – Who was the one who contemplated going after their murdering/thugish/dope dealing friend???

CT = Camel Toe

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:19 pm

Slim…sorry to hear you’ve been bummed. Anything you wanna talk about?

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:20 pm

O/T (whatever topic we’re on now)…I should not have had that 3rd cup of coffee! I thought I needed it and now feel like I’m bouncing off the walls!!!

SlimUno

August 9th, 2012
12:28 pm

Goes back to that stuff I mentioned to yall about a person close to me marrying some dude she hardly knows. The plot get’s worse, in my opinion everyday. Now she’s put the dude on her little girls birth certificate, changed her name and is now having her call buddy daddy and trying to teach her the new last name. She has been married only ONE freaking week..claimed to be in love with him after a few days and is just on the highway of stupidity. I don’t have kids but my guess would be a step parent would need to EARN the right to be called Daddy and definitely have to have some married time under our belt before i added his ass to the BC. THEN to add insult to injury (aside from the fact that buddy doesn’t even have a car, job, has 3 kids of his own) they are now considering moving to a whole different state where she has NO FAMILY nearby whatsoever…supposedly buddy is going to try to get his old job back but she has a job where she currently lives. I’m just so disappointed on all levels. But anyway….how is everybody else doing :roll:

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:34 pm

Slim…that’s just crazy!!! I can’t even say anything about that. She sounds like my ex sister in law…

disco

August 9th, 2012
12:35 pm

slim – all I’m going to say right this minute is HOT MESS. I have more but I’m distracted.

quick question. if you had planned a vacation and mentioned said plans in conversation to someone else only to discover that they have also planned a vacation and your itineraries overlap do you take it all in stride or do you scramble trying to alter your original plans?

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:37 pm

@Slim: What’s wrong??? I’ve got you a shot of Goose and a Heiney….now tell Auntie ITL what the trouble is. :)

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:38 pm

disco…I would say it depends on if you really want to vacation with this person or not.

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:39 pm

Dang, Slim! :shock: Soooo, your friend does not see the potential pitfalls in all of this mess?

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

August 9th, 2012
12:39 pm

@Slim

Sorry to hear about that. Hopefully your friend doesn’t go too far down the rabbit hole that she can’t get out; hopefully for her and her daughter.

Leggs

August 9th, 2012
12:39 pm

Now, that’s some messed up stuff right there, SlimUno. What a risk in marrying someone you barely know, but moving to another state on the “hopes” he may get his old job back is beyond risky. Not only that, what was the old job he’s trying to get back. Heck, he could very well be a toy cop in a mall (not to slight anyone. The movie Mall cop popped in my head). Changing baby girl’s name so soon is…..is….is….surprising to say the least.

Just be there for your friend if and when the balloon burst.

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:40 pm

@disco – unless you’re going somewhere so small that you’re bound to run into them, I say go get your vacay on, girl, and don’t worry about your stalker. Um, I mean friend. :)

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:42 pm

@Bluz: And even if you are in a different section, you are still welcome to come to the tailgate. It’s less than a block from the stadium, so you can shuttle over to our spot, hang out, and then walk to the game with us. :)

Single and Happy

August 9th, 2012
12:42 pm

Disco, do you really have to have any contact with this person on vacation? or should I say want to have contact? I certainly would not change my plans because of someone else

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
12:45 pm

ITL – AWESOME!!!

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:45 pm

@Slim: I like Leggs’ advice about being there for your friend. Is she receptive to your opinions at all?

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:48 pm

:) @ Bluz. I do mean literally shuttle, too. There’s a free shuttle that leaves from the East Campus deck (FREE parking!!!) beginning 5 hours before game time and dropping off outside the main gate to the stadium (gate 6). Our tailgate is less than a block walk from there. ;)

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:49 pm

Where did Celisea and Willie D go??????

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

August 9th, 2012
12:51 pm

@Leggs

As a “step”father, I recall having plenty of discussions with friends along the scale of maturity about the ‘daddy’ issue.

Some thought I should demand it, others thought it would be ‘cute’, and others still thought I should request/encourage/bribe (for) it.

But as the son of a single mother – and a karate expert – I did what I would’ve wanted someone to do for me; tried to earn the designation by doing what I was supposed to do (period).

There are those out there that sooooo loosely use the designation of ‘daddy’ and ‘mama/mommy’ that the words have almost lost meaning, except to the unititiated/.

Celisea

August 9th, 2012
12:51 pm

ITL – A funeral. Just got back…..literally

disco

August 9th, 2012
12:51 pm

bluz – trust. we won’t be on vacation together. I didn’t invite them. they didn’t invite me. neither of us owns the joint. lol.

ITL – have I told you yet today that you are crazy??? it looks like I’m going but I still feel some kind of way.

S/H – do you understand the concept of funny acting? that’s what I am. there will likely be no contact unless we decide to have it but in my mind it’s just the principle. besides that – your “vacation behavior” may change drastically if you have witnesses and i’m a big fan of being incognito. ijs.

SlimUno

August 9th, 2012
12:54 pm

your friend does not see the potential pitfalls in all of this mess?

ITL – At this point, she is either smoking crack or is blinded by some serious wang. And the dude is about 20 years older than her. It all seems so impulsive and not thought out at ALL.

Leggs – That stuff regarding her child really took the cake for me. She knew how it was back in the day having to deal with a new stepfather, so why turn around and go all the way left with your own kid with a guy you haven’t even known 6 months??!!! Even jobs give you a 90-day probationary period. SOS (Stuck on Stupid!)

Single and Happy

August 9th, 2012
12:56 pm

Disco, yea I feel you, (don’t nobody know me, and I’ll never see these folks again) (LOL)

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:56 pm

@C: Sorry to hear that. :(

@disco: No, you haven’t told me TODAY but I know you’re always thinking it. I can see how you would feel some kinda way, but it’s not worth ruining your vacation over. Of course, you could always tell said person you’ve had to cancel your trip, wait to see if (s)he cancels his/her plans as well, and then at the last minute be like, “Did I say I cancelled??? I meant to say I can’t wait!” :lol:

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
12:58 pm

@Slim: smh. I feel some sadness coming on. I hope I’m wrong. I really do.

Single and Happy

August 9th, 2012
12:59 pm

Disco, where you going, (see if I can alter my plans) (LOL)

Into the Light

August 9th, 2012
1:01 pm

Yeah, disco, ME TOO!!! :lol: :lol:

Why do I have a drivin n cryin song stuck in my head???? Get out Kevin Kinney, get out I say!

Celisea

August 9th, 2012
1:02 pm

ITL – Thanks. It was the sister of our Admin. Very nice service. BRB…gotta catch up on work and grab lunch

Bluzgirl

August 9th, 2012
1:15 pm

Marco? Where is everyone?

SlimUno

August 9th, 2012
1:15 pm

ITL – Um, i have a cousin who has that EXACT name. Hmmm??? He doesn’t have locks does he?

i'm swiss

August 9th, 2012
1:17 pm

Slim — Is you cousin the lead singer for an alt/country band?