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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Should you confess indiscretions?

One of our MIA blog readers would like a little advice about what he should do. He and his girlfriend recently had “the talk” and decided to go exclusive. Soon after the talk, he goes on a weekend trip with his boys and has a little inappropriate contact with random girl at bar.

He knows that since they had “the talk” he should own up to his indiscretion. The problem is, his girlfriend broke up with the last guy for a similar offense. Although he believes what he did was “not as bad” the fact that he didn’t actually sleep with someone else means he should keep it to himself.

If you are in an exclusive relationship, would you confess if you did a little dirt on the side? Would it matter the degree of the offense?

If someone you were seeing did something inappropriate with someone else, would you want them to tell you?

What would do if you your new boyfriend/girlfriend had an encounter with someone else, right after you decided to be exclusive?


P.S. For the record, I believe that if you hook up with someone else on vacation/out of the country or state..it’s still cheating. Seriously, don’t ever ask for a pass on something like that.

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

394 comments Add your comment

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
12:57 pm

Cel…I can tell you that I had no problem falling asleep last Thursday night after all the activity! ;-)

SlimUno

August 6th, 2012
12:58 pm

O/T: I heard a chick on the radio the other day saying how she saw a chick at church that had a back tattoo that read, “Balls Deep”. :shock: Just had to share that with yall :lol:

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:00 pm

S&H…yes, it’s been the same doctor. I believe it is supposed to be short term, but for me it turned into long term. I think since I have generalized anxiety disorder, it’s more understood that I might need a sleep aid. Most people take it during short bouts of insomnia. I get more anxious at night and my mind races and then I start to worry about the time and that makes it worse. I’ve tried it all…

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:00 pm

Slim what was this chick wearing that showed a back tattoo at church, also that may be the old her :-)

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:00 pm

Bluzy – Mmm hmmm, I just bet….that’s usually how it goes. Maybe night right away but that’s some goooood sleep

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:02 pm

Bluz, have you tried a different doctor? it’s strange for a doctor to keep someone on something that may become addictive.

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:03 pm

Bluzy – Don’t be taking stuff during “sessions”….lol You can’t get the full effects.

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:04 pm

He’s been my doctor since I was 8 years old. He knows my life story basically and will give me whatever I need. He says that I know my body. I really don’t want to get off it. It does it’s job. I have a friend who takes it recreationally and I just don’t understand how. I take it at 9:30 every night and usually am asleep by 11:30.

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:05 pm

Cel…I know, right? When I know this guy is going to come over, I won’t be taking it. (I need to come up with a nick name for him). With the ex, he lived with me and knew what time I took it every night. It was his fault if he gave a great performance that I don’t remember! I told him that I didn’t want that to happen often because I want to enjoy that!!!

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:06 pm

Since you were 8, it’s your business, but you may need to look into getting another doctor. If you’re taking it every night, and can’t go a week without it, you’re hooked. that’s not good for you.

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:08 pm

Bluz he gave a great performance because you really weren’t yourself, if it was that great why couldn’t he repeat it when you weren’t taking it?

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:10 pm

S&H…I hope to get off of it eventually, but not yet. I’m still working with my therapist for anxiety coping methods. It’s a long process to get it all figured out!

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:10 pm

Because my ex was a selfish jerk! I just didn’t really know it at the time…

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:11 pm

Bluz do you have the anxiety issues every night?

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:12 pm

So his performance was only great in his mind (rotflmao)

SlimUno

August 6th, 2012
1:14 pm

S & H – From what I could gather, I guess the lady that called into the radio station was sitting behind the chick. So maybe when she leaned over or got up, her shirt rose up and she could see the tat. lol

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:17 pm

The issues are worse during the week. I think it’s because I know that I have to be asleep by a certian time or the next day will be rough. Also, there are work issues. To be honest…I only take my anti-anxiety medicine in the morning when I get to work to keep me calm throughout the day. Otherwise, I may lash out and lose my job.

On the weekends, I think I don’t have a problem with the anxiety at night because I’m up watching tv, working on things, reading or whatever until I’m at the point of being exhausted. I’ll stay up until 2-4 am on the weekends. I don’t usually take anti-anxiety meds on weekend either, unless I’m dealing with some tough stuff in life.

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:17 pm

Slim, isn’t that just like them church ladies, always judging others, maybe she need to read my moniker (LOL)

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:20 pm

Okay bluz, I had some morphine once, it was so good, I didn’t even want to have sex, when they told me I couldn’t have anymore I went into a slight withdrawal, and it was only one 1 or 2 shots. I’m say you may want to go to another doctor about the ambien, 3 year is a long time.

Into the Light

August 6th, 2012
1:21 pm

@Bluz: If you have anxiety issues, DO NOT go to Costco during lunch time. Whew. I was ready to run over somebody’s heels with my buggy. :evil:

SlimUno

August 6th, 2012
1:23 pm

S & H – You have a point but even I was sitting there wondering why state of mind that chick was in when she got that tattoo. Balls Deep?? Really though…not the sort of attention I would want for myself. But we all are living and learning every day

Into the Light

August 6th, 2012
1:24 pm

@Slim: :shock: Mercy. smh

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:26 pm

Slim she got it for her man (LOL) while he was putting the tattoo on (LOL)

SlimUno

August 6th, 2012
1:27 pm

I think Bert from Q100 was taking ambien almost every night and has since weened himself off of it. I’m not certain if he’s begun taking something less addictive or not. Maybe a fellow blogger may know. I can’t see it being a bad idea to look into some other alternative Bluz

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:28 pm

ITL…I don’t think I could handle that! There are times that when I go to Wal-mart, I have to get on the phone with someone just to distract me from all the people and the anxiety!

I remember after the break up, I had a minor panic attack at the grocery store. I hate grocery shopping and he either went with me or did it himself for 2 years…it was hard getting back into it, but I’ve learned to cope and have no problems anymore.

Into the Light

August 6th, 2012
1:29 pm

Completely off topic: I thought I’d be nice and bring back treats for the office (thought maybe it would improve my crappy mood). Don’t you know that I got out of the car and dropped the container of cookies on the ground, it came open, and spilled a quarter of the container? I wanted to give the ones that fell on the pavement to someone “special” here, but I was nice and threw them away. :lol:

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:29 pm

I CANNOT do Trashmart. I’ll run in on the way home for emergency stuff but I HATE that store. Especially the one on Howell Mill….ugh

SlimUno

August 6th, 2012
1:30 pm

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:30 pm

Slim…Bert was taking Lunesta, which is not supposed to be addictive. I tried that and it didn’t work at all. I’ve tried every type of sleep aid and they don’t work.

Into the Light

August 6th, 2012
1:32 pm

Wal-Mart is enough to give anyone a panic attack. There are times I pay more just to avoid going there.

Have you tried any alternative methods, like Melatonin or Valerian? I’ve heard good things about those. On the other hand, if it ain’t broke….

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:33 pm

I have a pretty high tolerance level. It takes a lot to knock me out. I came to, during a prodecure. That was not fun

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:34 pm

ITL – Most times I pay more to not shop there…lol

Bluzgirl

August 6th, 2012
1:34 pm

ITL…the herbal stuff worked for a couple of days and then nothing. Tylenol PM worked for a week and then nothing. You know…If I’m not on Ambien, I will be dependant on something else…

Into the Light

August 6th, 2012
1:35 pm

I came to, during a prodecure.

:shock: Dayum, Gina. I’ve heard stories about that happening. Did they re-sedate you? I saw a story about a woman who woke up during a procedure but bc of the paralytic drugs she couldn’t say anything.

i'm swiss

August 6th, 2012
1:35 pm

Ever tried weed?

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:37 pm

ITL – Yep. I was groggy but I was awake. I could hear everything. I started moaning because I could feel the pressure of the procedure. That’s when I heard the doctor tell them to give me another shot.

Into the Light

August 6th, 2012
1:37 pm

Leave it to Swiss….. :roll:

SlimUno

August 6th, 2012
1:38 pm

ITL – It’s probably just the gloomy weather and you know God does have a sense of humor ;-) I think I told yall about the time I was going through a rough time. I was at work and decided I just needed to get out of the office so I went to lunch. I was praying in the car for patience. Next thing you know, I get stuck behind the train. It kept going forward then backing up, forward then backing up. Of course this did not help ease my already growing frustration. Next thing I know I just start laughing to myself like, ha ha ha…Ask and you shall receive. I guess I just didn’t expect Him to challenge me with patience that fast. :lol:

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:38 pm

That was at St. Josephs…even though I still like that hospital.

Into the Light

August 6th, 2012
1:38 pm

That’s scary, C! :(

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:39 pm

Cel, hope you didn’t feel the pain.

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:39 pm

ITL – Heck yeah…that’s the only time it’s happened though.

I’m still trying to think of some profound meaning for balls deep. Other than the obvious

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:40 pm

Swiss, no medical weed in GA (LOL)

i'm swiss

August 6th, 2012
1:40 pm

ITL — Hey, it could help. And it’s natural. :lol:

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:42 pm

Single and Happy – Odd thing, I didn’t. Just pressure though. Sort of like the pressure you feel when you’ve gotten a eipdural. I didn’t feel the pain the I shole felt the pressue. kkk kkk, woo…Kkk kkk woo…kkk kkk woo Those are breathing excercises while labor pains are coming every three minutes….lololololol

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:42 pm

Cel maybe she was a basketball player, or played lingerie football, ( I guess that’s how you spell it)

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:42 pm

Single and Happy "don't judge others simply because they sin differently than you"

August 6th, 2012
1:43 pm

cel, don’t know nothing about birthing no babies (LOL)

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:43 pm

Single and Happy – LOL…I was trying to find some “religious” meaning. What’s lingerie football?

Celisea

August 6th, 2012
1:43 pm

Chile, it’s at the top of the pain-o-meter