In love and don’t know it?
Do you think it is possible to be in love, or in the process of falling hard for someone, but you know really know it yet? I ask because someone once told me that he didn’t recognize the signs when he first fell for his wife. Looking back, he sees that his behavior was changing. He was changing (for the better!) and it was a gradual, subtle change.
If we start feeling things for someone we are dating (uh, not those things), like really strong feelings, do we recognize it right away? I think some people freak out when they notice it and others just ignore the scary feeling.
Do you think it is better to fall blindly in love? Would that mean we won’t get the chance to mess things up?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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324 comments Add your comment
Lily
August 3rd, 2012
6:49 am
I’ve never been in a place and didn’t realize, but if there is change taking place for the better, why not?
oddmanout
August 3rd, 2012
6:51 am
Good Morning!
When you realize that you are falling love, it’s only scary/ freaks you out, if you are the type of person that say’s “I”ll never fall in love” or “Love aint for me”.
Do you think it is better to fall blindly in love? Yes. That way your normal guard wont be up and you will be open to explore.
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
8:41 am
Morning….
I have nothing on topic, just wanted to add that to my moniker
Bluzgirl
August 3rd, 2012
8:50 am
It’s hard for me to believe that anyone could not recognize when they are falling in love. Sometimes, you can mistake feelings of lust for love, but that can only last so long.
DreamsMaterialize
August 3rd, 2012
9:01 am
Morning
I don’t have anything on topic either. How about a Bert Show topic though. If you were invited to a destination wedding, bought your plain ticket, booked your hotel, reserved your rental car, and then were uninvited…what would you do?
Celly Cel How are you this morning? Can I join you in congratulating Gabby? She’s great. I think it sucks though that our own people have resorted to criticizing her hair. WTH is wrong with people? lol
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
9:05 am
What Bluz said is the way I think.
Cely: For those that care Gabby went to the Olympics and made us proud of her.
Good Morning: All facilities open and active.
SlimUno
August 3rd, 2012
9:07 am
It’s a little easier to figure out your true feelings once the honeymoon phase wears off a bit.
Oh, and Good Friday Morning
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
9:10 am
Bluzgirl
August 3rd, 2012
9:11 am
BF…can I get a mimosa this morning? I can use it!
SlimUno
August 3rd, 2012
9:12 am
Dreams – Frank Ski was talking about that very thing re: Gabby’s hair. One day we’ll support each other without having to throw a dig in there….Onnnnnne day. May not live to see it but Onnnnnne day, it’ll happ’n.
BF – So are you manning the bar this fine Friday? I think i’ll start slow, a mimosa perhaps?
Bell with Wisdom
August 3rd, 2012
9:12 am
Yes, that has happend to me. When I realized that I was falling hard… I took the cowards way out and ran. Falling in Love for real is a very scary thing for anyone who has experienced hurt or dissapointment. This Bell has not always been so wise. My actions may have caused me to miss out on something really special. But what I know today is, if the feelings are mutual…. Love is always worth the chance.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
9:17 am
Bluz here you are enjoy your mimosa. I’m gonna sit down and finish off my long island tea’s.
Bluzgirl
August 3rd, 2012
9:17 am
DM – I only hard part of the story this morning on the Bert show…is she still going?
Bluzgirl
August 3rd, 2012
9:18 am
I’ll take a long island later…can’t start off with a bang while I’m at work
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
9:19 am
Slim1 coming up.
kimmie
August 3rd, 2012
9:19 am
Morning All!
I actually understand the topic quite well. My first experience at falling in love was truly amazing, but it’s crash and burn left me never wanting to feel such heartbreak again. From then on I put up a wall around my heart. Sure, I fell in love again, but not hard, to that extent. Thing is, when you spend years trying to shield yourself from heartache, you can have trouble recognizing when it’s the real thing. You’re so busy looking for the other shoe to drop! I had to let that go. For me, distinguishing love from lust was easy, it was believing it was love that was the hard part.
So proud of Miss Gabby!!! I saw Dominique Dawes talking about her and crying tears of joy.
Dreams -We are our own worst enemy, MOST of the time!
Urinal Cake
August 3rd, 2012
9:20 am
DreamsMaterialize
August 3rd, 2012
9:01 am
Morning
I don’t have anything on topic either. How about a Bert Show topic though. If you were invited to a destination wedding, bought your plain ticket, booked your hotel, reserved your rental car, and then were uninvited…what would you do?
Plain ticket? as in dull, drab, not flashy? Or you just don’t know how to spell plane?
kimmie
August 3rd, 2012
9:21 am
Slim – Frank No-Neck Wannabee-All-That Ski really needs to sit down and shut the H up!!!
SlimUno
August 3rd, 2012
9:23 am
Bell – That’s how the Beau was when he started feeling something in that cold cold heart of his lol j/k but he was a bit weary. That song Jasmine Sullivan song comes to mind
Lions, Tigers and Bears
I’m not scared of lions and tigers and bears (oh my)
But I’m scared of (loving you)
I’m not scared to perform at a sold out affair (that’s right)
But I’m scared of (loving you)
Am I the only one who thinks an impossible task?
Why it don’t last? Is that too much to ask?
Why do we love love, when love seems to hate us?
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
9:24 am
First off, Gabby is just a child. Any adult taking potshots at her is just plain stupid. Next, if you’re in training so many hours a day/week, ummm, how much sense would it make to keep your hair pressed and in an upsweep? Really? Her hair looked fine to me…and I hope she goes to the bank with it just like that.
Gooooooooo Gabby!!
kimmie
August 3rd, 2012
9:26 am
Dreams – In answer to the Bert Show question, that would probably be the end of our friendship. I would forgive, but that would not mean I’d have to continue to deal with that person. I would get whatever refund I could from any expenses incurred and all I could not recover chalk it up as a loss. Sh– happens in life. Trying to sue for the cost of the plane ticket and all would be not worth the time, I’d probably lose, and would probably end up costing more money.
disco
August 3rd, 2012
9:28 am
good morning. blind? heck no!!! eyes wide open and seeing very, very clearly is the way for me.
dreams – I’d take my trip, have a good time and tell the busters that uninvited me that they could kiss my A. okay. I guess it would depend on who the couple was and why I was disinvited but if the reasons weren’t on my approved/acceptable list I’d most definitely tell them where they could go and how they could get there.
slim – one day sounds good but not likely. it’s like world peace. please. most folks don’t have peace in their own households let alone on a global scale.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
9:29 am
Speaking on Gabby I haven’t paid any attention to her hair all I know is what she accomplished at 16 very few people have. They needed something to be critical about and they chose her hair? Just Damn.
disco
August 3rd, 2012
9:31 am
I missed comments on gabby’s hair. what were they? and what do folks really expect from athletes? imus started that mess back when. it got to the point where those girls could hardly play ball because they were too focused on not sweating out their hair. folks need to get some business. now – if they were talking about condoleeza rice’s hair back in the day I’d co-sign. I kid, I kid. LOL.
kimmie
August 3rd, 2012
9:33 am
Celisea – I agree. Plus, I didn’t see an issue with her hair?? Some of us really need to get it together! I remember Wendy Williams criticizing Viola Davis for wearing natural hair to the Oscars! If Gabby spent the time fooling with her hair she would not have that medal today! Folks trip on those that won’t work out or swim because of their hair but then trip when we decide to go natural or wear braids so we can more easily partake in activities. Everybody doesn’t want to wear weaves or wigs or get perms so they can fit in with corporate America!
That burns me up!!!
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
9:36 am
LOL………@disco
Bluzgirl
August 3rd, 2012
9:36 am
I’m sad that I missed Gabby last night. I just saw a brief clip on the news this morning when I got up. Hopfully, I can catch at least highlights this evening.
SlimUno
August 3rd, 2012
9:36 am
Dreams – I may go just for the vacation part of the already paid for trip…and just skip the wedding. Or either try to change the location or something.
disco – Yeah I know…was just being a little sarcastically hopeful
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
9:37 am
On the Bert show issue….
True story: A couple of years back, a really really cool friend of mine got married (I talked about her on here before). She transitioned to our team from another state due to a merger and to remain gainfully employed. Anyway, this is the one where the fiance’ moved up here following her. Well, she plans this elaborate wedding and EVERYBODY wants to go. It’s the department chatter for a few months. The wedding is held in her hometown state. With the entire department being invited, get this…..everybody started making plans as to who’s going to ride with whom and who’s rooming with whom…for traveling and reserving rooms. Well, wouldn’t you know, the chick (the dynamo that applied for a job on my floor a couple of months back…remember?) that no one really cared about got UNINVITED!!! Yep, my friend (getting married), went to her and told her the head count was miscalculated and that she wouldn’t be able to reserve a room for her and pretty much said in a round about way, not enough food for her. THAT WAS SOOOO NOT TRUE. That wedding was so posh and elaborate that she could have grabbed a shrimp or two, a glass of wine and sat on the side and the wedding would not have missed a bit. She was soooo hurt by that. To this day, if I mention hey, so and so came up here to see me, she’s is BITTER. Anyhoo, I think it’s a tacky move. If you invited someone, and for whatever reason change your mind, bite the bullet and just let it ride.
I guess it didn’t help that my friend that got married opened up an all girls valet service…boy she hates on her as often as she can…lol
disco
August 3rd, 2012
9:37 am
kimmie – as a sister with natural hair I say “SPEAK ON”. I am amazed when folks assume that just because our hair is natural that we don’t have hair drama. I run 3-4 times a week and hit the gym in between (when I can). even with natural hair, maintenance is a muthah. I wear more than my share of puffs and flat twists but you gotta do what you gotta do.
Leggs
August 3rd, 2012
9:38 am
“He was changing (for the better!) and it was a gradual, subtle change.” – That definitely is a sign that one is connecting with another. He’s cognizant of what she brings to him and what he needs to do to keep her interested in him. The subtle changes are usually not that subtle.
Yes indeed , GO GABBY! I could barely keep my eyes open, but I was determined to see her to the end. What a delight she is!
Good Morning.
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
9:39 am
Kimmie – Exactly. What is the big deal?? When I see her, I see a kid. I see my kid. Heck I can drop $80 bucks getting her hair done on Saturday and by Tuesday, she’s sleeping on it and it’s all over the place. Can’t we just be happy she’s doing something productive? The more she comes into being a woman, the more she’ll bring that kind of stuff together. What? Cause she ain’t a 10 year old hooch, folks find that odd. Geesh.
Makes me hot too Kimmie.
disco
August 3rd, 2012
9:42 am
C – your example is exactly why I said it depends on who invited me. if it was just some random co-worker, friend of a friend of a friend or something then I’d chalk it up as whatever. I know I’m not that high on the totem pole. even with certain family members I know I don’t rank that high. if it were someone that I felt was more important to me (and I was more important to them) that’s when I would like I needed an explanation as to what was really up.
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
9:43 am
Bluzy – How did the evening go?
kimmie
August 3rd, 2012
9:43 am
disco – So right girl! A lot of people do not realize natural hair still requires maintenance to be healthy and look nice. My stylist explained that to me when I talked to her about growing out my perm. I’ve actually heard some folks call those that go natural “lazy”! The nerve!
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
9:44 am
LOL………I had to go there disco, imagining Gabby wearing puffs, would that be ok with them?
Exiled!
August 3rd, 2012
9:45 am
Falling in luv…hmmmm
Is that the same as loving some folks/people?
I luv a lot. I don’t know about falling in luv. I don’t know if I know if I have ever fallen in love coz I have never had it broken.
I don’t think I am capable of falling in love the way you guys define it..to a love partner that is.
I love my wife,no question but I think I am replaceable as much as she is.
Well,she may have a different feeling or thoughts about this but that’s my take.
And I luv Cel,Slim,Disco,Kimmie All of you ladies.
Good morning!
Leggs
August 3rd, 2012
9:48 am
“When I realized that I was falling hard… I took the cowards way out and ran. ” – That’s such a shame. We are here for many reasons and falling in love with another is one of the reasons. However, I do understand when some find love and run it’s because they’re not ready for the “exclusive” part of the relationship. So many lost relationships exist solely because of greed. Not saying that was your reason Bell.
kimmie
August 3rd, 2012
9:50 am
Celisea – If you recall, folks talked about Venus & Serena when they hit the scene with their braids and beads. Criticize their tennis outfits too.
None of that stopped them from taking over women’s tennis!!!
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
9:50 am
disco – Exactly. I think I would be offended either way, but you’re right, if it’s no love lost and we aren’t really wrapped that tight anyway, I could chaulk it up and move it along. It is tacky though.
I think because the chick uninvited had “work behavioral” issues and always snubbed, my friend started having seconds thoughts. Second thoughts after the whispers and stuff. I didn’t go, she could have had my seat…lol
Leggs
August 3rd, 2012
9:52 am
“If Gabby spent the time fooling with her hair she would not have that medal today! ” – You are so right. She had a craft to hone! Her hair is fine.
However, still would like to give props to that other Russian who had a flawless routine. She too nailed it (just not enough to beat Gabby)!!!
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
9:52 am
Kimmie – Exactly. I say nappy, natural, straight…whatever. You cashing in? Forget what others have to say. Now the Williams sisters can opt to do whatever they want…and it’s AOK…lol
It’s always the haters though.
kimmie
August 3rd, 2012
9:59 am
I could see if someone did something mean or unforgiveable to you and in the heat of an argument you uninvite! Heck, if it’s that bad, they probably would not show up anyway.
Otherwise, to “unvite” – extremely tacky. If you overextended your budget or whatever, suck it up! Things have a way of working out anyway. At the last minute, you’ll almost always have some no-shows.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
10:01 am
Leggs: Gabby’s performance was as flawless as a human could ever be. The Russian girl was just as good but not like her it was made for Gabby to bring it home.
Celisea........gooooooo Gabby!!
August 3rd, 2012
10:02 am
Meelloo – Good morning and good point. We luv you too…lol
I know I’ve been in deep a couple of times in my life and thought the world was ending when it was over. As silly as it may sound, I don’t know if I know what love is. IMO, I think if you’re tied or drawn into something that you cannot turn aloose because of life, commitment and all that other stuff that keeps you bound, then maybe that’s leaning on it. I have said it before. I think love is way deeper and profound than any person can “word.” If you can probably explain it, then it’s probably not.
Of course, JMHO
Leggs
August 3rd, 2012
10:02 am
I do agree BF.
Exiled!
August 3rd, 2012
10:06 am
I just saw a snippet of Gabby on tv coz I didn’t understand what u guys were talking about.
Her hair is fine actually beautiful..
Who is complaining about her hair?
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
August 3rd, 2012
10:10 am
Cely remember a few months ago they didn’t arrest the Sniederman widow well she’s in the big house now. The DA wanted to make sure he mess her life up she can’t get bail until the 20th of the month. Now that’s some funny stuff there.
Bluzgirl
August 3rd, 2012
10:13 am
Cel…it was WONDERFUL! We went out to eat and then came home, had a few drinks, and then had some fun…
Leggs
August 3rd, 2012
10:13 am
That is one smug woman (Sniederman).