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Sexting: Is everyone doing it?

A recent study at the University of Michigan revealed that sexting has “become a normal part of the dating process for young adults.” That means it’s not shocking, unexpected, or inappropriate for men and women aged 18-24. So our smartphones are now turned into xxx-phones, that apparently is a part of the wooing process, umm does this news bother anyone?

I wonder about the fine line between sexting responsibly – and sexting irresponsibly i.e. Congressman Weiner style.

When do you think it is appropriate to send a dirty text message or picture? Guys, if a woman sent one without you asking her first, would you judge her? What if you had just met her?

Do you think that there is a way to pull off sexting so that it intensifies the attraction instead of kills it?

Have you ever received a racy text or picture that you did not want?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

421 comments Add your comment

Leggs

July 30th, 2012
1:45 pm

Somewhat understand, Single. They were engaged, so marriage was on the table.

And your post alludes to the fact that you guys have a sexual relationship, not a romantic one (lol).

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
1:45 pm

Single you and I are the same age, looking back do you think your parents made you who are now? Or at least gave you viable training to make good decisions on your own.

Celisea

July 30th, 2012
1:47 pm

Comon Cents – Frankly, I stay in my own lane. I don’t take crap off my kid. When she’s grown and gone, hopefully I’ve instilled enough down in her. If not, it’s on her. I see other folks’ kids but really what can you do? I will say this, I’m not tolerating from someone I’m dating. Good thing though, at my age I don’t see too many toddlers. :)

Kimmie – See, that right there is why I don’t want to deal with young kids. Not that I don’t love babies or kids but everybody’s idea on parenting could vastly differ. Shoot, if y’all marry that’s some mess to have to deal with. Get it together before the nuptials or leave it alone. Money and other folks’ kids are two things that can make or break. And if I can’t say something to your kids (in a relationship), then I’m not buying for your kids. If I’m going to love them, then it should be understood that it’s coming full circle.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
1:48 pm

I remember them saying “you gonna wish you had listened to me one day.” I knew then I never wanted to hear those words come out of their mouth again.

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
1:49 pm

Blackfoote, yes they did, and by making us have to think for ourselves as kids, it gave us the common sense to know right from wrong.

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
1:51 pm

BF~ On the “you gonna wish you had listened to me” speech. All of the things I used to SWEAR I would never say to my kids when I was the parent I have said. Parenting definitely gives you a different perspective on what your parents did when you were a kid. LMAO!

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
1:51 pm

Leggs, i didn’t hear the show because I don’t listen to the radio anymore, but these days fiance and being engaged really doesn’t mean what it used to mean.

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
1:53 pm

C~ IDK how old you are, but I am amazed at the number of toddlers I’m seeing in my age group! I’m thinking some of these people will be getting Social Security before their kids are old enough to be out of the house! :lol:

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
1:53 pm

Comon Cents, swore I’d never tell my kids “cause I said so” ate that one up real quick (rotflmao)

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
1:56 pm

Comon it comes full circle, it always has and always will.

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
2:08 pm

Mine was “And if a frog has a glass bottom he’d break it when he jumped too!”

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
2:09 pm

Comon I’ll bet as kids you were looking like what the heck does that mean (rotflmao)

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
2:11 pm

Single~ Right? And my kids look at me te same way. Like “WTH is she talking about?!?”

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
2:12 pm

LOL…….@Comon

That’s a good one, parenting is an art the majority can manage and others needed to a pass on kids.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
2:13 pm

That’s funny too I would have that k-9 look with my head turned to the side wondering what the heck is she talking about.

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
2:16 pm

I love when people tell me ” you want to have your cake and eat it too” I say what else do you do with cake??

Leggs

July 30th, 2012
2:17 pm

I can honestly say I don’t recall ever saying “because I told you so,” but I’ve recently said “if you should have a baby, I hope it’s a girl so you can better understand things from my end.”

Single ~ I agree that our parents left us alone to figure things out. A sense of entitlement didn’t exist. We worked hard and studied even harder.

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
2:21 pm

Leggs~ Don’t have any babies then , because that is the 1 parent curse that actually works. :lol:

kimmie

July 30th, 2012
2:23 pm

these days fiance and being engaged really doesn’t mean what it used to mean.

Single – No, it still means the same thing, folks just want to make light of it.

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
2:25 pm

Leggs it’s funny how when we failed at something IE: didn’t make the team, it wasn’t the end of the world we moved on to something else or practiced to try again next year. and our parents didn’t plan our lives, we used our imaginations and came up with things to do.

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
2:25 pm

kimmie~ I think that now a days people go into marriage with the idea that if they’re not happy they can get divorced. Back in the day, that wasn’t even an option.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
2:30 pm

Leggs yep we were set up to succeed, some kids today not all of them do have an entitlement syndrome. Even some parents feel they are entitled, I saw yesterday where this church in Lilburn was giving away 10k pounds of food to anybody who showed up. There was a young girl with 4 kids and no daddy saying how glad she was to receive help. She said she made mistakes and didn’t learned from them to the point where is she now. I felt bad for her, but they have to have hard in order to learn.

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
2:34 pm

BF~ I saw that story too. My premise is- if you don’t like the view, change the scenery. I went back to collee and grad school as an adult. For some reason, when my parents were willing to pay for scool, I wasn’t interested in doing the work. However, after getting out in the real world and finding out that no matter how smart I was, no one was going to give me a chance without a degree, I sucked it up and paid my way through school so I could take care of me and mine. It takes great sacrifice, but it can be done.

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
2:36 pm

Kimmie that’s why I say it doesn’t mean what it used to mean, because to most of those using the words, it doesn’t mean anything. I mean how can you use those words when you’ve been living together for years and have kids, what the heck are you waiting on??

disco

July 30th, 2012
2:36 pm

looks like we are still on bad A kids. that’s one thing I was never accused of having. if anything I heard that I was too rough on him or that he was too “grown” but my son was never a discipline problem.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
2:37 pm

Our parents was this way you gonna finish high school, what you do after that is on you. Once we finished school we were asked are you going back to school or find a job. If you dont’ go to school you will go looking for a job, and when you find a job you are going to have to move. I was out at 17 and never returned, except to visit.

kimmie

July 30th, 2012
2:40 pm

Comon – I agree, but I also look at that as not necessarily being a bad thing. While I do think people are less likely to try to work things out in a marriage, as in all thing in our instant society, I also think all was not what it was cracked up to be back then either. There was such a stigma to divorce that a lot of people stayed in bad situations because of it. Especially women. They put up with a lot, and the men knew they were not going anywhere.

I’m of a different mindset. Happiness is paramount with me. I believe in doing the work upfront = choosing wisely and really getting to know the person I’m going to be dealing with. No guarantees, but I’m minimizing the damage. I’m in it for the long haul, but I’m not sticking around for crap either. I do my part – I don’t want a divorce so I don’t do the things in my power that will lead to one, like messing around, excessive irresponsible money habits, poor hygiene habits, you get the picture!

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
2:41 pm

When someone tells me they don’t want their kids to go through what they went through, my response ( is your life really that f****d up now, because what you went through as a child is what made you the adult you are today).

kimmie

July 30th, 2012
2:46 pm

Single – All I know is when dude asked me to marry him and gave me a ring, we were engaged. Wedding plans commenced. Same with everyone else I know. No matter if you’re shacking or got kids or not. Just talking about it doesn’t make you engaged. If he proposed, you should have a ring and plans made. Even if you don’t agree in giving a ring, like Exiled. An engagement is an agreement to marry. Just because you are shacking or somebody’s baby mama or daddy doesn’t mean you’ve agreed to marry.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
2:50 pm

Single you hit the nail on head with that one, what ever you went through as a child molded your personality as an adult today.

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
2:50 pm

Amen, kimmie! Or I love the people wo are engaged to be engaged. I’m like WTF?!? Where they do that at? I’m with you. I don’t even need a wedding; we can go to the JOP. As long as it’s legal. I don’t understand people who live together and have babies and everything else then wonder why it doesn’t work out.

I actually knew a couple that shacked for 12 years. They had 5 kids together. They got married and were divorced in less than 3 years. What?!?

Leggs

July 30th, 2012
2:50 pm

Growing up, we used our imaginations for fun and sometimes out to outsmart our parents. These days, too many are using their imaginations like Pinky the Brain, trying to ruin the world!

kimmie

July 30th, 2012
2:55 pm

Single – When parents say that, most want the kids to go the easier path. For example, finish college first and maybe take a trip abroad before you have 3 kids you have to struggle to support while you take college classes at night.

Leggs

July 30th, 2012
2:56 pm

“When someone tells me they don’t want their kids to go through what they went through, my response ( is your life really that f****d up now, because what you went through as a child is what made you the adult you are today).”

Single, that reminds me of a convo I had yesterday with a friend. We were talking about how hard life was when we were younger but it helped make us who we are. We then jumped to college lamenting on how we got through it with no student loans or grants. I said “I don’t know how I did it, but I did it.” She said, yeah, look at you now standing in your own driveway w/car in garage…all we could do is laugh.. Life was hard, but it wasn’t unbearable!

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
2:57 pm

Leggs those were the days when we had hot fun in the summer time.

kimmie

July 30th, 2012
2:58 pm

Comon – They would have done better just continuing to shack. After all that time, who cares? If it was important to them to do things legal and all, they would have done it in the beginning. No point in trying to change up the story now.

Into the Light

July 30th, 2012
2:59 pm

@Leggs: A coworker and I were discussing that this morning – the differences between when we were growing up and kids growing up now. We had to laugh, too, because she was saying that she doesn’t allow her kids to eat certain candies for fear of them choking. But when we were little? Shoot, you’d have a fireball in your cheek, standing up in the front seat of the car while your mom drove to the store. :)

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
3:00 pm

Kimmie, some yes, most that I talk to, that’s not what they mean, they mean not to want for anything, never have to make decisions about anything. I’m a blue collar skilled factory worker, most don’t want their kids to do that. Everyone can’t go to college, and some need to realize their kids aren’t cut out for that.

Into the Light

July 30th, 2012
3:00 pm

and your “seatbelt” was your mom or dad throwing their arm across you if they had to slam on the brakes.

:)

Celisea

July 30th, 2012
3:01 pm

Well wouldn’t you know…all hell broke loose at work….covering for other folks and client managers….geesh. I’m having issues coming at me left and right…just dang great

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
3:01 pm

Now all they want to do is shoot, maime, and kill innocent bystanders and run.

Celisea

July 30th, 2012
3:02 pm

Annnnnnnnd there goes eyecandy

Into the Light

July 30th, 2012
3:03 pm

@C: Shhhhh, don’t say candy. I’m craving something sweet. :(

Leggs

July 30th, 2012
3:03 pm

BF ~ man don’t I know it. We had mad fun in the summer. These youngins are clueless, aimlessly shifting through summer crying about being bored. Back in the day, saying “I’m bored” meant hard work around the house. We learned quickly to never utter those words.

You are so right, ITL. I’ll replace your fireball with a large jawbreaker. Can’t believe we ate that stuff.

kimmie

July 30th, 2012
3:03 pm

Leggs – One thing mom used to preach to us is that there are no shortcuts. I didn’t quite understand then but of course I do now. Most want the end result without paying their dues or working for it. Even if you get a scholarship, nobody is going to go to class for you or study. You still have to earn the degree. Most don’t want to take the time and effort to do that, but expect to waltz in and command the salary. Don’t have the degree or even some of the experience, but want the perks.

Bluzgirl

July 30th, 2012
3:04 pm

I’ve briefly read through what ya’ll are talking about. I did hear the girl on the Bert Show this morning and I felt bad for her. I can’t even imagine how bad that must have hurt…

Anyway…I did something really stupid this weekend with a guy friend of mine and I have such mixed emotions about it. Glad I’m going to see my therapist today…

Celisea

July 30th, 2012
3:05 pm

ITL – Girrrrl…mmm mmm mmm CANDY!!!

Comon Cents

July 30th, 2012
3:05 pm

ITL~ Funny you should say that. We were just talking the other day about things we did as kids that I would have a fit if I found out my kids did them today. When I was a kid, there was a train that ran through the town where my grandmother lived. We had cousins on the other side of town, so we would hop the train and take it to the other side of town (like a freight train; not MARTA) and then catch the train back in the afternoon or hitchhike. I would lose my rabid a$$ mind if I EVER found out my kids did something like that! LOL! And it wasn’t that it was so much safer because tat was at the height of the Atlanta Child Murders.

Single and Happy

July 30th, 2012
3:05 pm

comon most of the time people that live together a long time don’t stay married long. IMO it’s because they expect things to change once they get married, start living like newlyweds when their already an old married couple!

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

July 30th, 2012
3:06 pm

Light you’re feeling better I hope. Riding without seat belts were the norm because we didn’t have the drag racing on the highway like there is now. And 85 north was a three lane interstate.