Best breakup advice?
I was getting my car checked for emissions the other day, and the technician randomly asked me for dating advice. He wanted to know what the best way to get over your ex.
Now I was surprised by a couple of things: How did emissions technician know I was a dating blogger? Men actually worry about this kind of thing too?
I have gone through a couple of break ups, so thankfully I have come a bit more resilient. I didn’t have many tips to offer the brokenhearted emissions guy. Time makes it a lot easier. Distractions are good. What is a good amount of time to get over a relationship that lasted years?
Some people think that men get over break ups faster, but I think they are just better at hiding their pain. What kind of things do you do when a relationship ends?
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258 comments Add your comment
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:32 pm
Enter your comments here
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
2:35 pm
Right now I’m struggling. I want something sweet sooooooooo bad. I have really cut back on the junk food.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
June 26th, 2012
2:35 pm
What’s wrong Leggs I’ve never known you to hold your tongue. Ut oh this is one for Swiss make his splashing debut.
SlimUno
June 26th, 2012
2:36 pm
O/T: What’s a polite way to tell a co-worker that the fragrance/lotion or whatever they periodically put on throughout the day offends your senses…is too strong…causes almost an instant headache every time they put it on??
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:36 pm
I’m not holding my tongue, the machine isn’t allowing my two sentence W8 comment through.
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:38 pm
Why not go up to her and and say “excuse me so and so, but yo isht stinks. Please take it home!”
disco
June 26th, 2012
2:39 pm
slim – it doesn’t smell like tiger rose does it?
cba
June 26th, 2012
2:39 pm
Cel, I totally agree w/your post. I’ll give her a pass on being a home wrecker, afterall John was the one married and wife had a terminal illness. Just out of respect, she could have left all references about Elizabeth out of her book.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
2:40 pm
cba – Exactly. Folks operating with no convictions. Just a dang shame.
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:43 pm
Celisea ~ I’m following you. I do remember Elijah being ___________. W8gate is rarely mentioned here so for someone to post as W8 says a lot!
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:43 pm
WOW, guess the old moniker has been banned.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
2:45 pm
Leggs – Yep. I’ve already laughed and thought, just let “Elijah” keep busting his chops. After a while he’s gonna tell on himself.
disco
June 26th, 2012
2:46 pm
i’m about ready to “break up” with a guy I met earlier this month. so here’s the deal. when I met him I essentially “stalked” him (well I initiated contact since he acted like he wasn’t checking for me. lol). that night we sat in a quiet corner and spoke for hours. he insists the exchange was “amazing”. (I put amazing in quotes because this is the same guy who I told to shut it with the amazing like that’s the only adjective he knows). having spoken nearly every day since we met I’ve realized that if left to his own devices he really has nothing interesting to say. he’ll talk about his job or his family or what he’s having for dinner or any old nothing. If I introduce a topic or lead a conversation he follows along well enough but I hate having to be responsible for carrying the conversation. frankly I’m about ready to either just cut losses now or tell dude to up his talk game. what says the infinite wisdom of the blog?
mocha_latte
June 26th, 2012
2:47 pm
W8 is Elijah now?
SlimUno
June 26th, 2012
2:47 pm
disco – I can’t say that i’ve ever smelled tiger rose..or even know what that is. The person is smoker and I think she puts whatever it is on, to cover the cigarette smell and it just does not mix.
disco
June 26th, 2012
2:51 pm
slim – that’s my inside joke. that’s what my co-workers cranberry joy by body shop smells like.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
2:52 pm
disco – he’ll talk about his job or his family or what he’s having for dinner or any old nothing
You said you can bring topics up where’s doing an okay job following well enough. and he’s bringing a bit of conversation. I mean to talk about his day IMO is something to talk about. So, what else would you like to talk about? Is it that you’re just needing a reason? Say not really feeling him?
I’ve read some of the men here say they would dump a chick if she can’t talk on current events. I don’t really agree with that. I want to know how your day went and how are things going with you. Current events for me is secondary. It’s okay to talk about, don’t get me wrong but I want to be that person or place to talk about more immediate personal things. I don’t want to hear a man whining but sort of like letting him lean on you as an outlet for all that’s happened that day. You know?
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:55 pm
I essentially “stalked” him (well I initiated contact since he acted like he wasn’t checking for me. lol). – that’s doesn’t look on your part, disco.
I at first thought you were talking about your dingbat acquaintenance when I realized this is about the guy you told to shut up a few weeks ago. Ummm, i see you monopolizing this relationship then running it in the ground because you’re disgusted with his lack of intelligent input. Go stalk someone you can actually spar with (lololol).
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
2:56 pm
mocha latte – We aren’t really sure but it was just funny how this so called “Elijah” was able to immediately bring up that time. I would say a tragic time for a couple of women on here. Had folks retreating and stuff. We do however believe this so called “Elijah” is not the one from back then but could possible be the real W8 that morph into another blog persona. Now this current so called “Elijah” is like over the top now. He started out saying something here and there, not sounding like the old one but when we called him on that, I dunno he started trying to sound like the old Elijah, going from bad to worse. Too the old Elijah was fresh but not disrespectful. He’s trying to hard now. He wants to blogho but he’s doing so under disguise….or so he thinks.
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:56 pm
that’s doesn’t look on your part, disco. TRANSLATION: that doesn’t look good on your part, disco!
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
2:58 pm
” I would say a tragic time for a couple of women on here” – and that right there is the kicker, Celisea! No one jokes about that time. I wanted to feel him out but I already knew.
COME OUT, COME OUT ELIJAH!
Exiled!
June 26th, 2012
2:59 pm
Cel?
u want something sweet and All these men hear that and Do nothing..
Sometimes blogmen just disappoint me by their denseness and lack of drive..
It’s called crotch flatfooted!
@Mochalatte? Looks like u ripe for some licking urself! How appropriate when u pop in when we discussing the licker in chief W8!
need a cobweb cleaning
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:01 pm
Leggs – What’s funny is he’s been here…all along. He’s not as slick as he believes. Sometimes you just go along for the sake of keeping the blog peace. He’s several different names but I can’t say. There are a couple of dead giveaways. Not anything you’d have to study but I think if you’re pretty astute they’re apparent.
But don’t mind us Pinocchio, go on and your thing. LOLOL
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:03 pm
MMeello – Noooo, I HAVE something sweet. I was speaking specifically to you and your ability to be hard on women sometimes. I was just saying you ain’t all that hard. Just like I’m not
cba
June 26th, 2012
3:03 pm
disco, you’re a straight shooter…..just tell the brotha you’re no longer interested. That’s the reason I had to use a half gallon of gasoline on that wallet size pic 34 yrs ago. If you are not interested in me, hell say so.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:05 pm
cba – LOLOLOL..say it ain’t so
disco
June 26th, 2012
3:05 pm
celisea – actually I do get what you are saying. thing is, that’s not my personality type in the least. i’ll accept a quick synopsis of your day but I don’t need the blow by blow. I won’t say I’m using this as an excuse to bounce but I already recognize that it could be a problem for me.
leggs –I use the word stalk because it’s entertaining. still, I did watch him for a while before making the first move. he just looked like somebody that maybe I should know. lol. you may have hit the nail on the head though. some friends and I already analyzed the whole educational background, blue collar/white collar thing. I’d like to be big enough to say it doesn’t matter but who would I be kidding.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:06 pm
disco – Sometimes it’s a no go. Pull the plug, gently please ma’am (look at me talking). Let him down easy.
Exiled!
June 26th, 2012
3:08 pm
Disco..are u worldly,do u like politics,sports, etc and when he responds do u have an actual conversation and he tells u his opinion or he merely listens?
IF and IF there is no input other than yea,ya oh okay..yea Dump Him!
Starting with you job is good.
Tell him your boss did a b c d,something jacked up and contrived and see if he offers sympathy for
u or not.
If Not,don’t even give him Sympathy pudy!
Toss him!
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
3:09 pm
Celisea ~ many have never left. I agree. A person’s writing style is their fingerprint and the more they try to cover it up, the more the light shines on them.
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
3:11 pm
disco ~ I didn’t think you actually stalked him. I remember your original post when you said you approached him first.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:12 pm
Leggs – Exactly! It’s a little pompous to not feel the need to at least TRY and fool folks. To do stuff under folks’ noses is brazen to say the least.
Exiled!
June 26th, 2012
3:13 pm
CeL my 2:59…I was jokingly responding to your ‘ I want something sweet’
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:17 pm
Mmeelloo – Ooooooooooooh, okay. I totally missed you spinning from that…lol I do though. I’m having the shakes over here. There was a gang of desserts in the conference room when I went back in to turn out the lights but I didn’t touch because I believe another group is probably going. If I check again in a few minutes and the they’re still there, I’m going to help myself to something
disco
June 26th, 2012
3:17 pm
ex – sympathy booty? from me? puh-leeze. no man who knows me would even try to go there.
celisea – I could just hear me now with the it’s not you, it’s me speech. “it’s not that you can’t carry a conversation it’s just that I don’t want to hear the bs you are talking about”, “it’s not that I’m judging you for your poor spelling it’s just that I wanted a man I could play scrabble with”, “it’s not that I have a problem with your southern accent it’s just that I’m from the northeast and we speak differently”. lol. I swear I’m not trying to seem all saditty but I sound that way even to myself.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:18 pm
disco – Don’t break it down like that!! Just tell him so sweetly “it’s not you babe it’s me” If he insists, maybe. lol
Elijah
June 26th, 2012
3:21 pm
Ladies, Ladies it is I the one and only Elijah. I had to take a hiatus from the MIA blog when W8 was cutting the rug as the old timer’s use to say. Actually I know very little about what happened with W8 and the others. With the housing market crash plus other responsibilities I no longer had time to blog..
SlimUno
June 26th, 2012
3:23 pm
disco – That reminds me of last night’s episode of Single Ladies…the new chick that took Stacey Dash place was into this dude because he was super cut and sexy…However, he would say some very strong opinions about women athlethes, the president as well as ghey men. Every time it would bother her, she’d get side-tracked by his body but finally she couldn’t take it anymore and kicked him to the curb. Taking his shirt off didn’t work that time lol
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:24 pm
Elijah – Give us a sign…lol Show us your birthmark
disco
June 26th, 2012
3:26 pm
slim – we are in different states so his talk game carries a lot of weight. all that tall, dark, and prison cut pounds (someone on here said prison cut pounds and I liked it) can’t help him on the phone.
okay, I’m done clowning. he truly does seem like a nice enough guy and as a single woman over a certain age I’m really trying to remain open minded.
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
3:29 pm
Elijah, if I gave you your initials would you be honest with me and say I’m right or wrong???
Elijah
June 26th, 2012
3:35 pm
@Celisa I did not bring-up W8 that was exiled….I am still the same. I would never approach a woman I am interested by requesting a picture… I am just having a little fun. The MIA blog sometimes serves a great purpose… good relationship advice and good Laughter….
Elijah
June 26th, 2012
3:36 pm
Yes Leggs I would be honest, but only if you send me a picture! j/k
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:37 pm
Elijah – I’m not mad at you…lol I say have fun, do your thing. Yes, I know MMeello mentioned W8.
Be warned though…remember what happened to Pinocchio?? It’s not gonna be the nose though. Just saying…lol
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
3:38 pm
Elijah ~ are your initials LP??
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
3:39 pm
“…remember what happened to Pinocchio?? It’s not gonna be the nose though. Just saying…lol”
That was funny.
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:39 pm
And it’s NOT gonna grow. Just saying. That’s what happens to grown up Pinocchios….I’m only funning
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:39 pm
Leggs –
Celisea....ITL's twinkie
June 26th, 2012
3:41 pm
I hate our performance review platform. I mean really? It’s like rocket science. I’m trying to attach some “stuff” that folks have written in on me over the last six months. Dang, I’m close to printing, stapling and mailing to my manager.
Leggs
June 26th, 2012
3:42 pm
Sounds like Lorena Bobbit is about to infiltrate…