Would you marry after 2 weeks?
I really was not going to get into the new HBO, show Girls. I am soo far from being a young girl (birthday is in 10 days!) and I don’t live in New York (not yet, that is.). Yet here I am, thinking about last night’s season finale.
One of the characters decides to up and marry a guy she met a whopping 14 days earlier. Now, I am all for spontaneity and living in the moment, but how does a two week relationship evolve into a marriage? Well, it’s fictional and on HBO, which isn’t just TV, so whatever.
The reality is though, there are people who believe in love at first sight. Some fall so hard and so fast, that they commit to a life together right away. Does that mean their love isn’t real, though?
I really want to know the marriage statistics on people who met and married in a short amount of time, compared to those that didn’t. What do you think those numbers would be?
Would you marry someone after two weeks of knowing them? Do you think love at first sight is possible?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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272 comments Add your comment
Leggs
June 18th, 2012
12:55 pm
kimmie/Celisea ~ it pains me when men want this ride or die chick and wants to make sure she’ll stick with him through sick and sin, prove herself to him, etc. but he’s not doing the same in return. A relationship is a balanced, concerted effort from both, not one having to prove more to the other!
But, there are some men out there that can brainwash a woman. My brainwashing years (if I ever really had any) are far behind me.
Single and Happy
June 18th, 2012
12:58 pm
Leggs, most guys would not do the same, how many men do you hear about waiting on their girl while she does time, she’ll be luck if she gets 1 visit from him.
For Real
June 18th, 2012
12:59 pm
Disco out at dinner…..
Kendarius: How’s your dinner Disco?
Disco: Heyyyyyyy!!! Why did they give you 6 string beans and only give me 4 and a half?
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:00 pm
Leggs – Exactly. I was just thinking when disco mentioned “keeping score”, if anything it’s the perfect opportunity to take it to the next level. Not run someone in the ground because the score is leaning to your favor. Having a chick (or dude) going through changes (i.e. ride or die) cause you can is wrong. A ride or die chick because y’all in it to win it is not the same thing.
My sister was sister with me Saturday. This is the sister that I rarely talk with (she’s just not around that much) and she really touched me. She had a wonderful husband and left. I can’t really say why because I wasn’t up in their business and I know for years he wanted her back. Heck he followed me through HD asking me what’s up with her and her behavior. She talked about how she’s gone through so many changes, how she allowed some men to drag her through the dirt, how she’s paid money and it can’t buy love. She’s “hard” like me for lack of a better term and it really touched me to see that side of her. It made me ache a bit for her….
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:01 pm
“sitting”
For Real
June 18th, 2012
1:01 pm
“I guess that’s when a person finds soloace in the fact that the 401k, life insurance, pension etc. is committed to them.” – Hence the reason for the decline in marriage.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:03 pm
For Real – So true
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:04 pm
Leggs – That describes it perfectly – “thru sick and sin”!!
Remember that crazy topic we had about the “after date” survey? I was telling Dan I’ve never been open to criticism from a man I dated. That “attempt” at brainwashing was the main reason why. Not only would it be just his opinion, I didn’t need him trying to get in my head. Early on, I recognized that power a man can have on a young woman. All the hard work my parents put in to raise me as a confident young lady that thinks for herself could be gone in one poof, from some joker whispering his nothings to me! It’s powerful, and some cannot resist it!
SlimUno
June 18th, 2012
1:04 pm
For Real – How was the bday?
Lady~wow factor
June 18th, 2012
1:05 pm
Howdy MIA!!!! C good reading you honey! great POV!!!!! good seeing you last week too!!!!
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:07 pm
Lady – Hey there! How goes it? Good to see you pop in. Good seeing you as well. I’m digging Loca Luna now….you know that right?
For Real
June 18th, 2012
1:09 pm
Ladies I have asked this question in the past but I’m going to ask it again and no you can’t have both.
Happiness or Marriage?
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:12 pm
For Real – A happy marriage
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:14 pm
How was the birthday, 4 Real?
For Real
June 18th, 2012
1:14 pm
“All the hard work my parents put in to raise me as a confident young lady that thinks for herself could be gone in one poof, from some joker whispering his nothings to me! It’s powerful, and some cannot resist it” – If it’s that easy for a man to undue “all the hard work your parents put in” I say that your parents didn’t do a good job then. Stop blaming men for weak minded women. Men nor women have magical powers.
Slim: It was really cool. One of my gifts was a rented boat for two with dinner and likka served for 3hrs.
For Real
June 18th, 2012
1:16 pm
For Real now slapping the ish out of Celisea for medicinal read and comprehension failure.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:16 pm
If we’re talking right now…happiness I’m actually happy now and I wouldn’t change a dern thing
If getting married means a shift in my state of things now, then happiness.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:17 pm
For Real – LOL…If I knew I was getting slapped I wouldn’t have answered subseqently…
Leggs
June 18th, 2012
1:17 pm
WOW, that touched me, Celisea. Even reading it I can imagine her pain. The pain is in her eyes, in her being and the men know it. She wasn’t whole when she got with them.
Men indeed have a lot of power. I don’t like “weak” women and never can understand why a woman would let a man get into her psyche and tear her up. And the men who do this are actually weaker than than the woman they’re belittling. Put it this way, I’m just thankful I never had to xperienced this because I shut a man down with the quickness if necessary. I rememeber my ex telling me the classic line men say when the woman is leaving and has children “nobody is going to want you because you have a child.” I look around to make sure he was talking to me because that was the dumbest stuff I’ve heard in a long time. I remember laughing and walking out the room.
Leggs
June 18th, 2012
1:18 pm
Happiness
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:19 pm
4 Real – I’m not blaming men, and nobody has magical powers. My parents did a great job, along with what I had in me. I “recognized” though, and we’re talking teen years, how a weaker person could fall for the okey doke. I think it’s a form of peer pressure and it’s powerful. Now if you’re grown & still falling for it, then that’s on you.
Birthday sounds like fun!
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:20 pm
Leggs – I’m still reeling sort of because she’s never really opened up like that. Then she talked about pulling her daughter of the fire. Her daughter is 26. Chile we don’t know what “love” is gonna do to our girls. I have tissue box in hand. Just never know. Sometimes (for our daughters’ sake), I despise what “love” is going to do to them. Some will fair okay, some will not. I’m there and ready for anyone of them to lean on me.
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:21 pm
Answer to the dumb question – I already got both!
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:22 pm
For Real – Your birthday sounds like you had a “romantic” time. Mmmm, I didn’t think you did or like romance. I likey
For Real
June 18th, 2012
1:24 pm
“If getting married means a shift in my state of things now, then happiness.” – For Real now rubbing an analgesic on Celisea’s check while whispering in her “Slickback wouldn’t have had to put the smack down if you would have listen. I know you sorry but let not let that happen again. Now go sit by the fan and let that dry. Cause you know Slickback loves you.”
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:24 pm
A happy marriage
Just wanted to say that again. I dang shole don’t want to do it with a crab for a husband. Heck I almost don’t want to do it at all. I’m good. Y’all remember before and only once I talked about my feelings about marriage. I don’t say it often cause folks think you’re lying if you’re “good” as is….unless you’re a man. Otherwise you’re just saying that cause you can’t find anybody to love…lol According to the blog of course.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:25 pm
For Real – You stoopid…lol
Willie Dynamite
June 18th, 2012
1:26 pm
Afternoon All,
Off Topic – I mam SO not liking being in this office.
Topic – I personally could NOT marry after 2 weeks. I do think for some it is possible and by all means if they want to give it a go then why not. Love/Marriage does not come with a how to manual. Apprently all the tried and so called true methods don’t exactly have a recipe for success. I don’t judge one way or another because you never know what floats anothers boat.
Single and Happy
June 18th, 2012
1:28 pm
I have nothing against marriage, and may get married one day, but to hear someone say I want to be married and have children and you don’t so i’m moving on, “Watch what you ask for, because you just might get it”
Bluzgirl
June 18th, 2012
1:29 pm
Cel…I’m with you…a happy marriage. I hope to get married one day and when I do, we will be happy together. I don’t think I can be just happy without a promise of marriage. I WANT to get married. Now…I won’t just marry any old fool…I know I will find the right man one day. I just gotta quit wasting time on jokers!
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:29 pm
I don’t judge one way or another because you never know what floats anothers boat.
Willie – That says it all right there. Just like those that choose not to marry or those that say it’s a dealbreaker if someone they meet doesn’t want to.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:31 pm
Bluz – Go get it girl! I hear ya. You’re on the right track. Don’t give a loser (i.e. joker) the time of day. Keep your time open for winners
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:32 pm
Bluz – You’re gonna get slapped by For Real for that answer…lol
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:33 pm
Single – What is wrong with wanting someone that wants the same thing? And respecting what that other person wants, whether its to stay single or get married? Where does the “watch what you ask for” part fit in? You take a chance with anything you decide to do, there are no guarantees in life.
For Real
June 18th, 2012
1:34 pm
“And the men who do this are actually weaker than than the woman they’re belittling.” – That’s an oxymoron Leggs. And I’m calling BS! It’s YOUR fault if you get used and no the person that used you is not worser than you for falling for it. Stop propping dumb people up. It only inable them to keep being dumb.
Kimmie: If you weak a teen then nine times out of ten you will be a week adult. Like I told my son “Peer presure ain’t nothing but an excuse for you not doing what’s right.” – Oh and For Real now medicinally slapping the ish out Kimmie for answering questions that do not apply to her.
Celisea: What would give you the impression that I’m not romantic? For Real now stroking his baby hair.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:35 pm
And just because a person openly states what they want, it’s not wrong. Just like you don’t want to marry and not wrong for feeling that way, it’s only fair if a person that wants to marry have to same priviledge for putting out there. I think that’s where a lot of misguided thoughts and concepts come into play. I don’t think any man or woman “need” another person. Folks tolerating people’s attitudes is what’s cause this whole love thing to become skewed.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:37 pm
For Real – I dunno, maybe it’s your constant outcry women, women in general, the female gender, women with emotions (that’s a one two package), women breathing….need I go on? LOL
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:38 pm
your constant outcry AGAINST women
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:38 pm
4 Real – Part of me, a large part of me, is actually agreeing with your stance on peer pressure! I don’t allow my kids to use it as an excuse actually. I tell them all the time to “be a leader, not a follower”. But I do recognize that peer pressure does exist.
Now you know this convo would not be complete without my slapping the ish out of you right back, you do know that?
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:40 pm
For Real – You strike as the “get on in har (here) AnnaMae and do the dang thing” LOL A boat for two? Alright nah
SlimUno
June 18th, 2012
1:40 pm
For Real – Sounds like a nice Booty…oops i meant booze cruise to me. Glad you enjoyed it!
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:43 pm
I could go for a nice booty/booze cruise!!LOL!!
Leggs
June 18th, 2012
1:43 pm
“And the men who do this are actually weaker than than the woman they’re belittling.” – That’s an oxymoron Leggs. And I’m calling BS! And I’m calling BS! It’s YOUR fault if you get used and no the person: – AND, I’m call BS on your post. How is that an oxymoron? The man is weaker than the woman emotionall and mentally for inflicting mental, perhaps even physical harm to the woman. Only a weak man IN MY EYES, tries to destory the soul of a woman by berating her at every chance. If you don’t see it that way, that’s ON YOU. No doubt there are many levels to being used, but seems like you opted to not really read what I said.
SlimUno
June 18th, 2012
1:44 pm
“nobody is going to want you because you have a child.”
Leggs – A guy friend of mine is going through a separation from his wife. She already had a daughter when they met but they also had a son together. She left him and he basically told me he said, “Good luck finding a man to take care of you and your two kids by two different men!” Needless to say he is another bitter black man. lol
For Real
June 18th, 2012
1:47 pm
For Real now walking back 10 paces to get a running start to medicinally slap the ish out of Bluzgirl for reading and comprehension failure.
Single and Happy
June 18th, 2012
1:48 pm
@kimmie, nothing wrong with wanting the same thing, but be specific about what you want not just make general request :IE what you expect from marriage, how many children, how to raise them, how to discipline them, and so many more
kimmie
June 18th, 2012
1:49 pm
Celisea – I think some men have a problem with women that don’t follow the script. Those that choose to walk when they meet a man whose goals don’t match up with their own. As opposed to playing the stupid role of hanging around, trying to “change his mind”. That’s selfishness and disrespect to me, not respecting what another grown person is telling you about themselves. It could be “I don’t want to get married” and it could be “I want my future wife to bear me 5 kids”. If that’s not what you want, move on and don’t waste another person’s time.
SlimUno
June 18th, 2012
1:50 pm
And speaking of dumb…why did I hear on the radio the other day this song “I want a smart girl but with a dumb booty” We are definitely getting closer and closer to hell
i'm swiss
June 18th, 2012
1:51 pm
“I WANT to get married. Now…I won’t just marry any old fool…I know I will find the right man one day”
Bluz — Not picking on you, but this kind of illustrates a fundamental difference in perspective on marriage. Some people really want to “be” married, and are looking for qualified candidates to fill the position of husband/wife. Others (myself included), on the other hand, have never really cared much about “being” married. When I met Mrs. Swiss, I knew I never wanted to be without her. So, I wanted to marry her. But until I met her, marriage was the last thing I wanted.
Celisea...dragging and tired :)
June 18th, 2012
1:53 pm
Kimmie – Exactly. I can’t say all men but most will not try and find a medium, it’s my way or the highway. Kudos to those women that can hear what was said and it’s not lost in translation.
I just saw a drag in the cafe downstairs wearing a strapless dress that came up to the
cooterwang, leg warmers and a pair of seemingly 10 inch stilettos. How’s that for finding a mate? LOL