Vintage dating tips still applicable?
Not long after I spotted this quote on Facebook: Chivalry isn’t dead. It just left and followed wherever “being lady like” went. – I found a vintage article from 1938, sweetly entitled Tips for Single Women.
I think my favorite gem from 1938: Don’t drink too much as a man expects you to keep your dignity. Drinking may make some women more clever, but most get silly.
Obviously, a lot has changed for single women and men since 1938. I think the idea of how a woman should behave has changed so much, you would be hard pressed to find traditional views like these.
I don’t know if this is a good thing or a bad thing, though. Are vintage dating tips that talk about the expectations of “lady like behavior” still applicable today? Does it explain the lack of chivalry today?
Are men slow to be more chivalrous because they don’t really see that much ladylike behavior that deserves it?
What kind of dating tips do you think our parents and grandparents were given when they were single? Did they ever pass any on to you that are still relevant?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures In Atlanta Dating Blog
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117 comments Add your comment
Lily
May 30th, 2012
8:00 am
I don’t think so much “dating” anything has changed but more so principles overall. No men aren’t gentlemen so much anymore because women have become no holds barred and frankly does any and everything. Nothing special about us, our bodies, our outlook. Nothing grand anymore about being virtuous. If anything, you’re considered “strange” for being a women of yesteryear. Nothing strange about it to me, just rare. I still believe in it and I stay “getting respected.”
Lily
May 30th, 2012
8:09 am
……and yes, all of what and how my, parents raised,me to be is still relevant. I won’t ever abandon….no lmatter how antiquated.
lolalee
May 30th, 2012
9:24 am
While the dating tips appear quaint and a bit outdated, the essence isn’t so bad: leave a little mystery, don’t be annoying, look your best, and don’t act the fool.
I think folks make the whole dating thing far more complicated than it needs to be. Be respectful and treat your date like you want to be treated. Not so hard, is it?
My father was ALWAYS a gentleman to my mother, his daughters, and all women. My man is ALWAYS a gentleman to me, my daughers, and all women. I like it, I expect it, and I won’t settle for less. I act like a lady, show him respect, and try to have something interesting to say.
Really, it’s not that hard.
lolalee
May 30th, 2012
9:24 am
and amen, Lily. I’m with you on this one!
lolalee
May 30th, 2012
9:26 am
and, as if you couldn’t tell, I love love love a gentleman. It’s a deal breaker if you are not one.
abc
May 30th, 2012
9:46 am
Every one of the vintage tips still rings true. Things change and remain the same.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
9:53 am
Morning!
Respectful behavior and good manners NEVER go out of style. You’ll find they serve you well in all areas of life.
Are men slow to be more chivalrous because they don’t really see that much ladylike behavior that deserves it?
I hate the above statement. Not only does it put the entire onus on women, but it makes excuses for slack behavior. No one else’s behavior should determine how you conduct your life, if you’re a real man or woman. That could be twisted around and said “well maybe there are some women that feel they don’t need to be ladies because there are not many gentleman around that deserve it”. Take ownership for what you do and how you treat others. If someone’s behavior doesn’t line up with what you want, avoid that person, but don’t get in the gutter with them!
abc
May 30th, 2012
10:05 am
Lack of chivalry means that a man’s father never taught it to him.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
10:09 am
Good morning.
Vintage dating tips are still applicable in 2012. Being a “lady” on a date isn’t rocket science, it should be expected. I still love it when I see a man tip his hat for a woman. Just like men like a “lady,” a woman truly loves a “gentleman” in their midst. Carry yourself how you would like to be treated, and if you’re being treated the way you want to be then you’re simply in the wrong company.
Not every woman knows how to be a lady, and not every man knows how to be a gentleman. Sometimes what you don’t learn at home or by the people in your circle, you may have to take cues from others you aspire to be like.
disco
May 30th, 2012
10:10 am
good morning folks. once, some years back, chivalry was the topic of a radio call in show. one guy (who sounded like he was country as a dozen eggs) called in and said that his wife whined about his lack of chivalry all the time. she complained, in particular that he didn’t open the car door. he told the radio host that if he pushed the unlock button on his key fob then his wife should consider herself “chivalrized”. yes, he did say “chivalrized”. I was in my car howling.
single and happy
May 30th, 2012
10:29 am
The way I treat a woman depends on how the woman acts! It will start out with me opening doors for her, but depending on how she acts, it may end with you got to hands, open your own doors!!
single and happy
May 30th, 2012
10:30 am
2 hands I mean
Willie Dynamite
May 30th, 2012
11:10 am
Morning All -
I think really you can take the Dating aspect out of the equation and just call it life tips. Certain behaviors are applicable whether you are out on a date or not. All of the traits under Chivalry (respectful,gentlemanly, etc) should be practiced at all times anyway. You should not have to rise or lower yourself based on anothers behavior. Find your lane and you’ll find yourself in the company of plenty folks in that same lane.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
11:11 am
WillieD – Many thanks for the well wishes. I didn’t see until later yesterday. You too Lady
Brownsugarvixen
May 30th, 2012
11:15 am
There are many that have a distinct eye for the vintage antique gentleman/woman that displays class. These types of morals never outdate but rather stand tall with time. Nothing like being a lady, and respected as such by all. I don’t see a need to throw out important information passed down by my parents because I’ve benefited from those tips at some point or another in my life. No need to tweek my principles to fit into the “dating scene.”
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
11:15 am
Cel – Praying that your mommy is okay.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
11:26 am
Kimmie – Thank you very much. She’s looking a LOT better than the past few days
Many many thanks!!!
Lady~hopeful
May 30th, 2012
11:40 am
Howdy MIA!!!!
Anytime C!!!! Glad she is feeling better!!!
Let me check out the topic! What a morning!
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
11:43 am
Celisea ~ haven’t read any of the posts, but from what’s here, I too hope your mom is on her road to recovery. Sorry to hear she’s been ill. Stay strong!
Mr_NYC
May 30th, 2012
11:46 am
Willie D, I second your point. Courteous behavior and actions should be part of life. You shouldn’t have to put on a special dating suit per se. Conduct should be based on your core principles and how you walk in life. You leave room to adjust to various circumstances but don’t follow trends and lower your standards because you can “get away with it.”
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
11:51 am
So what do i have to do to be able to comment around these parts? My post is stuck in moderation I guess.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
11:57 am
Thanks Leggs….much appreciated Mom in hospital.
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
11:58 am
Well anyhoo…(if this goes thru)…I was raised to be a woman for myself and a lady for my man.
One thing I really like about the hub is his love of a woman that is a “lady” in every sense of the word. I am that woman. However I have a strong ability to survive on my own.
What my parents were taught and what they taught me about dating still stands relevant today.
Opening doors, being attentive, saying “please and thank you” are staples of life. Even at the end of the date you find you don’t like each other, “thank you” is still in order.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
12:02 pm
Raqi ~ HELLO! Very glad to see you. Sincerely hope all is well with you and your family.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
12:05 pm
Celisea ~ stay positive and loving. Your mother is in great hands (she has the “Armor of God” surrounding her).
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
12:07 pm
Sorry, didn’t mean to say “stay loving” because that’s a given.
i'm swiss
May 30th, 2012
12:09 pm
First, can we dispatch with the misuse of the word “chivalry” and clarify that what we’re really talking about here is just plain manners. I don’t think anyone here is really referring to any oaths to defend the weak or loyalty to whatever lord/king/etc. might be over one at a given time.
That said, any advice that boils down to “display good manners at all times” is, and always will be, good advice, applicable in almost any circumstance.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
12:10 pm
Thanks Leggs….I understood ya. As y’all can see I’m working remotely from the hospital
That’s dedication for ya….I guess
Lady~hopeful
May 30th, 2012
12:12 pm
I can’t focus today lol #lurking smh lol
Raqi...A Real ousewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
12:23 pm
Hey Leggs. I hope all is well with you and little Leggs?
Everything around here is just fine. My oldest is graduating from the University of Michigan this fall and then going on (We all hope) to study to be an Aerospace Engineer like his grandfather, my dad.
My second is driving alone now (giving me palpitations and heartattacks) and had his first accident a few weekends ago.
The little lady is talking me to death and is schizophrenic about her baby brother. She loves him one day and hates him the next. She is the only one that can make him laugh hysterically though.
The Man is still doing what he does best and that’s being The Man and loving his family.
My dad is living with us now.
Say hello to Kimmie, SexyCool, Celisea for me. They may be commenting, (if they are “HI LADIES. I HOPE LIFE IS TREATING YOU WELL”) I don’t know because my screen keeps jumping to the top of the page and it’s getting annoying, but if they aren’t let them know I said Hi.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
12:30 pm
Heeeey Raqi!! Good to read you. Little Elizabeth…..that was funny. Just reading about your happenings made me smile. Seems like all is going well and I’m happy to hear that. Many blessings to you and family
i'm swiss
May 30th, 2012
12:36 pm
Hey Raqi! Good to hear from you. Glad to hear you’re doing well.
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
12:49 pm
Hey Celisea. I just read where your mom is ill. I will remember her in my prayers and hope she feels better soon. How’s the little Miss?
Hello Gouda. Any little mozzarellas yet?
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
12:53 pm
Raqi, congrats on the upcoming graduation. Aerospace Engineer, very impressive.
Lil Elizabeth is not schizo (lol), normal child loving/hating her sibling. She knows she has that “midas touch” to get him to fits of laughter.
Lil Leggs graduated from h.s. last Friday.
i'm swiss
May 30th, 2012
1:01 pm
Actually, Raqi, some of your baby dust must have made its way over to my neck of the woods. We just found out a few weeks ago that we’ve got a little SwissMocha on the way.
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:04 pm
High School already, Leggs?!?!?! Very Good.
So she is a year older that Jonathan. I thought they were the same age.
Where is she going to school next?
(I am cooking a fresh apple pie. Apple pie makes everybody happy. Especially when you add a scope of Bluebell’s vanilla ice cream.)
Yep my firstborn is really making me feel my aging now. LOL While caring for two little ones helps keep me active, vibrant and alert, my oldest two are just shoving me to OLD.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
1:10 pm
She’ll be 18 in August. Going to Georgia Southern for Nursing.
Speaking of cars, mine decided to pull mine out of my parking space while I went back to my desk for something. She pulls up to me and the front end on driver’s side is all dented and scratched by her scraping the pillar I was parked next too. Just got the entire front end, hood, headlights, everything fixed a few weeks prior. She cried and cried offering to pay for the damage. I wonder with what??? Peanut butter and jelly???
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:12 pm
Congratulations Gouda. You are in for an earth shattering experience. Helping to bring life into the world is one of life’s greatest gifts to mankind.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
1:13 pm
Raqi – Thanks for the well wishes. Funny you mentioned my kid. I was just grilled by the nurses because she and BOYFRIEND came together to see my mom. They all thought she was about 13…lol Everybody was able to breath a sigh of relief when I told them she’s 17… LOL dude. Aside from those kind of inquiries, she’s doing okay…
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:21 pm
LOL Leggs. That’s hilarious. It’s time for you to buy her a car of her own now. Right?
Nursing is a good field. Pays very well. My grandmother was a nurse for many, many years up until her diabetes got the best of her. She loved every minute of it. I hope your little lady loves it too.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
1:22 pm
Hey Raqita!!!
Glad to hear life is great with you & yours. I cannot complain either. Coming up on our one year anniversary on June 4th! The kids are doing wonderful and made honor roll!! I’m starting a fitness bootcamp next month for 4 weeks!
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
1:26 pm
Yep, those baby dust pks are making its rounds.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
1:26 pm
On topic: Being a woman and gentleman is never a thing outdated. I agree with those that stated manners should be a part of everyday life. I will agree though for those that don’t know…you better ask somebody. What I see being a problem is today’s generation seem to be at a loss as to what’s considered disrespect versus not. And as easy as it seem to those of us reared with manners and respect, unless you pass it along and teach another, they don’t have a clue. I was struggling getting my mom through a door while in her wheelchair and this big burly dude, moved aside until we could get through. He thought moving over displayed manners. Not even an hour later I had four FINE specimen of men to almost lift her off the ground. My sister and I decided to take her to dinner and those men met us getting out of the car. HUGE difference.
Lady~hopeful
May 30th, 2012
1:27 pm
C see you later today sis!!!!
glad everyone is doing well and enjoy the rest of your day MIA!!!!
peace~
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:28 pm
Celisea, I would have died. LOL Really I would have. I still can’t get used the kid bringing a girl by the house unannounced just to say hi or them play the video game or watch a movie. And I am on son number two with these shenanigans.
Glad to hear she is doing fine though.
17??? So it’s her that is my boy’s and not little Leggs. I knew one of them were.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
1:29 pm
I know that scenario wasn’t “dating” per se but I’m just saying.
Kid careers…my kid is still holding to becoming a pharmacist.
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:32 pm
Hello Kimmie!!!!!!!!!!
ONE YEAR?!?! You can’t see me but I am doing the happy dance and throwing confetti. CONGRATULATIONS.
I am glad you showed up before the naps are over and I have to get make to mothering.
How do you like being a fulltime mom?
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
1:36 pm
Raqi – LOL…teenage shenanigans in full effect. Yes your son and my daughter are the same age. Honey, they come strolling in like they’re a married couple. They took the train down here together. Gag me…lol I asked him what she’s gonna do when he goes off to college, playing ball. I only asked because he was heading out at 1:15 for his summer job and she was saying she was leaving with him (blank stare here), as if they’re joined at the hip. He laughed and said, “that’s what I’m asking her” oh and said “I want her to go with me” Ummm, yeah, okay, right… I just looked because I know better. SHENANIGANS I TELL YA!
Oh hes Raqi, I feel you…lol
Lady – Okay sounds good
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:37 pm
Celisea, I don’t know if you recall me talking about my friend Lacy on here a while back. She is a pharmacist. I haven’t talked to her in a while but she loves what she does. She would always say it’s “busy” work.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
1:39 pm
And who’s sprinking babydust? Please please please pass me by…lol I have babydus repellant in case anyone needs it
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
1:39 pm
Raqi – I love it, no better “job” in the world!! It helps that they are sweet kids though!LOL!!!
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
1:41 pm
Raqi – It seems like I vaguely remember you mentioning. That’s great. I’ll be sure to pass that along…the fact that she enjoys. The money ain’t bad either.
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:48 pm
Celisea, LOL. At least they are on the bus. My son drives so the places they can sneak off to and stay for too long are limitless. No bus waiting time.
I get so much joy out of embarrassing them when they are leaving to go see a movie or whatever from here.
“Keep your hands in your laps. And I don’t mean each others.”
“Don’t you be letting him touch him anywhere you wouldn’t want your mother to him touching you.”
“NO SEX. OF ANY KIND!!!” He always looks at me like “MAAAAA PLEEEAAASE”. LOL
As long as they know that I know what’s on their minds I can sleep just a little better.
Mr. Unknown
May 30th, 2012
1:50 pm
I’ve learned that you should not allow someones actions to dictate how you conduct yourself or treat people, but in the same breathe its becoming increasely hard, honestly times have changed. I still hold doors ect… especially for elderly women and men, help carry groceries to the car, even return those scooter things from Walmart to the front door. Its easy, takes two minutes out of your life to do. dang incomplete got to go have a good day.
DreamsMaterialize
May 30th, 2012
1:54 pm
Hey ladies and gents. Is that Raqi in the house? Good to see you on. Hope all is well with you and the fam.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
1:56 pm
Raqi – LOLOLOL…That’s sooo funny because go there as well. In front of the both of them. She said a minute ago she was hungry, I asked ummm so and so is not treating you today. She could have gone through the floor…LOL He says “no ma’am, I don’t any money but I started working yesterday” LOL I also say, keep you hands to yourselves and if you create or make it, buy it or go get it…it’s y’alls to deal with…
I AM THERE WITH YOU!!!
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
1:56 pm
You know Kimmie,…(I hear rustling from one of the baby monitors. somebody is waking up)…Some evenings I crawl into bed totally exhausted from dealing with my babies and their needs all day but I wouldn’t have it any other way. My lines have been cut so there will not be any more coming but I so love the ones I have and every minute I get to have them in my world.
I never told you this, mainly because I stopped chatting with you all, but I think what you are doing is absolutely wonderful. I have the utmost respect for you and just having conversation here with you I truly believe you are a gift to those children and your husband.
This is coming from a woman that is married to a man that chose a life where kids already existed. So I do know a little about what your life is like.
cba
May 30th, 2012
2:00 pm
Celisea, if you pass along the positive persona, that you display on here, to your mom, I’m sure it will help in her recovery. Hope she returns home soon.
Raqi, glad to read that your little one is doing well.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
2:00 pm
Thank you so much, Raqi! Your words mean a lot to me!
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
2:02 pm
Celisea, yep. If he can’t afford to buy her a burger they don’t need to be going out. LOL I tell mine that when he is looking to us for $20.
They went to the prom this year. I told him when he gets home to come by my room before going to bed. He better not smell like sex nor soap.
He thinks I am the meanest mother in the world. I must be doing an okay job.
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
2:07 pm
Raqi – Sho nuff. Learn and start if off right…lol I bought her lunch only. Now, if I can juuuust make it the next couple of years or so without dying or killing her or him, I will have overcome…lol
And yes, you’re so right about being considered “mean”…you are doing something right.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
May 30th, 2012
2:08 pm
Afternoon:
For me respect and manners for people will never go away.
Cely: I hope your mom is getting better, and stay better.
Raqi V: Hello there, I hope you and fam is doing fine. How’s that little man, I’ll bet he’s strong enough to lift you up now.
DreamsMaterialize
May 30th, 2012
2:12 pm
Oh and congrats to you and your young Wolverine! I’m guessing he was very familiar with North Campus…all the engineers are. I wish him the best. You know from my old life in aerospace, I still have contacts at Northrup Gruman, Lockheed, the Air Force, and NASA. Would be glad to share if it’s helpful.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
May 30th, 2012
2:12 pm
Cely sprinkle some of that dust my way, not that I’m behaving bad just so nothing sneaks up on me.
DreamsMaterialize
May 30th, 2012
2:13 pm
Celly Cel I hope moms is on the upswing. Will send up prayers. How are you holding up?
Raqi...A Real Housewife in Dunwoody
May 30th, 2012
2:15 pm
Hey DreamsM. How are you doing?
Hello cba.
I have to go upstairs to get my littlest one. He is crying now. But it’s been wonderful chatting with all today.
You all have a great rest of the day.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
2:16 pm
Raqi ~ yep time to buy a car, but thank goodness Freshman’s don’t really need a car.
Arguing with PizzaHut employees get you no where. Went into the store and got my order free…dumbclucks!!!!
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
2:17 pm
Ummm, guess it actually got me somewhere…
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
May 30th, 2012
2:20 pm
Leggs free is always good, even if you had to argue for it.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
May 30th, 2012
2:21 pm
Is your mother still in town?
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
2:24 pm
Yep.
disco
May 30th, 2012
2:26 pm
leggs – did you say your child was going to pay with peanut butter and jelly? too funny. and by the way, peanut butter can be kind of pricey. lol.
SlimNu
May 30th, 2012
2:27 pm
Well hellooooo folks….how goes it?
Leggs – How did the graduation and everything go. I apologize for asking if someone else already did. Been out of the loop since Friday.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
2:33 pm
SlimNu ~ graduation was beautiful. It really was a nice ceremony. So many walked down to the stage crying. They were so proud to reach this milestone. There was one girl that most thought was a little “fast” in the 8th grade. Thank goodness my child has always been friends with her because we knew others misunderstood her. She turned out to be the Valedictorian!!!
Went to Pappadeaux for graduation dinner and although it was delicious, graduation day wasn’t the day to go. Everyone seemed to be there!
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
2:39 pm
cba, Blackfoote, Dreams – Thank you all for the blessing of well wishes. We’re packing up and headed out of here!!! Y’all are a powerful group. Each of you
Talk to y’all a bit later.
SlimNu
May 30th, 2012
2:40 pm
Leggs – Glad to hear it…so lil miss messed your car up? Daaaaang, sorry to hear that. Oh and I didn’t have a car my 1st year at school either. I’d walk to the grocery store and carry my things in my book bag back to the dorm….unless someone else I knew was driving then I’d hop a ride with them. Then when i got a car, it was a stick shift so I didn’t have to worry about anyone bugging me about borrowing my car lol
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
2:45 pm
SlimNu ~ thank goodness it’s only a small portion under the left headlight. Much like the size of Mike Tyson’s head (lol). So many Mexicans honk at me asking if I want them to knock out the dent for $25-$50. No thanks. I always envision one trying to pop out the dent and a bigger crack emerges and then they say “no mas, no mas, not me fault!”
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
2:47 pm
Leggs – That’s amazing! So proud of lil Leggs AND the val!! Such things like graduations do bring you to tears. I remember that day like it was yesterday. I was excited to be entering a new chapter of my life, but sad to be leaving one as well.
Although I’ll never know, I wonder how it feels to be a dropout?
SlimNu
May 30th, 2012
2:52 pm
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
2:53 pm
kimmie ~ you don’t need to wonder, just look around you at so many shiftless young boys and girls walking around with no direction!!
Mr. Unknown
May 30th, 2012
2:53 pm
Sooo my classmate just passed out earlier during lecture. This is sad, I’m in the back of my computer concepts class, the next to the last row. I’m typing my response to today’s topic. I hear the instructor say are you alright, I look up for a quick second to see who he’s talking too. I see her standing up but don’t think nothing of it. I hear him say it again are you alright. Now I’m paying attention, I see her start to stumble as she is trying to make her way to the door. There are ten guys between me and her and not one dude stood up to try and catch her other than me and the instructor. I ran from the back of the class to help catch her. Come on man… Is that a case of people not being good in a crisis? I’m kind of disappointed in the reaction or lack there of.
SlimNu
May 30th, 2012
2:53 pm
kimmie – no you don’t…lol
Bluzgirl
May 30th, 2012
2:53 pm
Hmmm…the blog monster ate my post, I guess.
I don’t believe that chivalry should depend on “ladylike” behavior. Either you have good manners or you don’t. I don’t think you should have to earn chivalry from a man. That concept has to be one of the most re-di-cu-lous things I’ve ever heard…
Mr. Unknown
May 30th, 2012
2:57 pm
Also she is alright, the ambulance took her in to be checked. She stated that she gave blood earlier but she really wasn’t that coherent.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
May 30th, 2012
3:01 pm
Mr. Unknown as you experienced some folks just freeze in place when moments of valor are called for. People like you have a survivable instinct that goes into action when the need calls for it. Good looking out, hope she’s doing well.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
3:03 pm
Unknown – That is sad, that no one else would step up to help, but kudos to you and glad she’s okay!
Leggs/Slim – It would rip me apart to see all my friends graduating while I’m doing nothing. Let me take that back, cause I guess if I’m a dropout, I’m probably not exactly hanging with the smart crowd anyway. Birds of a feather tend to flock together!
disco
May 30th, 2012
3:08 pm
leggs – okay. I’m about to open up a whole can of worms with your 2:45. (disclaimer: i’m not trying to offend, just relaying a story). how come last week one of my neighbors (white chick) felt compelled to tell me that she was trying to move because of – and I quote – “those mexicans that moved in across the street”. the new neighbors have only been there a week or two. personally, I’d noticed the home was no longer vacant but hadn’t run into the new occupants. she went on and on with every possible stereotype. called them dirty, said the didn’t take care of their kids, she wondered how they could afford to live there, said there’d probably be about 10 people living there, accused them of selling drugs. oh she went on and on and didn’t stop. I was just looking at her like whoa. I finally asked her where she was planning on moving to, Switzerland or Norway or some place like that. oh, and she accused them of – and I quote again – “always talking that Spanish” whenever she sees them in walmart.
unknown – I think it was probably a combination of not having quick reflexes, not caring about others and not wanting to risk any liability. heck these days folks will sue you for helping them.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:12 pm
Mr.Unknown ~ you’re in the next to last row? How many rows for you to make it to the front to help out and the jerks in the first row sat there frozen??? Sheesh. Some can’t react fast enough to even save their own lives.
kimmie ~ the girl sitting behind me (who I do know) was crying so hard while all her friends walked. I tried to comfort her. She was supposed to graduate with everyone, but had to sit with audience with her newborn baby. I felt so bad for her. As the girls were walking out after throwing their caps in the air, many hugged her as they walked by. That teared me up. She was one of the young teenage pregnancies that attributed to her not graduating with her class.
Mr. Unknown
May 30th, 2012
3:15 pm
Yeah I guess, two out of ten men know what to do… Oh well. He could have at least canceled class.
disco
May 30th, 2012
3:15 pm
leggs – is that a school rule that the teen parents can’t walk or did the girl drop out? guess I should get my facts straight before I get all indignant.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:16 pm
disco ~ I started to say she’s probably one of those chicks in the WalMart pictures I get through email. All are comical and sad, but you did say she’s one of your neighbors (lolol).
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:20 pm
disco ~ don’t think it’s a school rule. That’s why I said it “attributed” to her not walking. Missing school due to being a new mom no doubt affected her grades.
i'm swiss
May 30th, 2012
3:22 pm
“I don’t think you should have to earn chivalry from a man.”
Bluz — I agree with you here. And I’m assuming that you feel the reverse is also true — that men shouldn’t have to earn lady-like behavior from women. Good manners should be the default from everyone.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
3:24 pm
Leggs – That’s heartbreaking. But if she puts her mind to it, she can overcome that. I’ve seen young women do it, and get college degrees to boot. Hopefully, she’ll build a decent support system to help her do it.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:26 pm
I was trying to remember who said good manners should be front and center. It doesn’t matter about one being chivalrous. If you have good character, it’s not a thought but a natural reaction to the situation your confronted with. Thanks, swiss!
Bluzgirl
May 30th, 2012
3:27 pm
Exactly swiss…I believe that we all are who we are. Some of us were raised better than others. We just have to weed out the jerks!
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:29 pm
I hope she does too, kimmie.
It’s getting hot in here, time for an icee.
disco
May 30th, 2012
3:29 pm
leggs – I called her out on her “sense of entitlement” and the fact that she mistakenly believes she’s better than someone but i still couldn’t help but to wonder where all that animosity came from. she was livid and those folks haven’t done anything but moved in and minded their own business. re graduation – just checking. I’ve heard of situations where the “bad influence” was removed.
kimmie – as far as I’m concerned, the girl already has gumption because I don’t know if I would have sat through someone else’s graduation.
bluz – and I think of the expression “no home training”.
Bluzgirl
May 30th, 2012
3:34 pm
disco…I think of the poor moms and dads who did their best to raise their children with manners and they still grow up to be selfish jerks! I know of several who were taught right, but went against it all.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
3:39 pm
disco – I actually was thinking the same, I don’t think I could have attended.
As far as home training and manners and such, sometimes it’s what is already in a person. I’ve seen people come from some of the worst homes imaginable and it’s something within them that causes them to seek better for themselves. Things they were not taught at home they find a way to learn anyway. I remember a guy I used to date right after college had this book of etiquette that he said really helped him as he got out into the business world.
Then I’ve seen folk that had every advantage still act like they were raised by wolves!
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:39 pm
Good for you, disco. She stereotyped the new neighbors based upon her slanted views of how she view them. A few weeks living there and she already knows they’re bad parents simply from watching from across the street. WOW.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
3:44 pm
That kind of bigotry blows my mind!
disco
May 30th, 2012
3:49 pm
leggs – she wasn’t calling the new neighbors bad parents. she was calling the group as a whole bad parents.
kimmie – and that’s it, just plain bigotry. I gave her every opportunity to give me one good reason (I would have accepted one bad reason). she even admitted that she didn’t know any personally but insisted that she still just didn’t like them. I laughed and told her happy house hunting.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:50 pm
O/T ~ here’s an update to 21 days dude. He contacted me yesterday online saying “if he offended me in anyway, he’s so very sorry and wonder if I would give him a second chance.” He said he was going through a lot of emotional stuff when he lashed out at me. Said his mother passed away 3 weeks ago and that he has never stopped thinking about me.
I somewhat understand yet, his response and his actions were immature and could have been handled a helluva lot better without the element of disrespect. Grant it, I was the recipient of “displaced anger,” but his emotional outburst showed me a facet of his character I didn’t like. I did send a msg that I am sorry to hear about the passing of his mother. He asked that I call him, but I haven’t.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:51 pm
Oh, gotcha, disco…even worse and myopic in her thought process.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
3:52 pm
Leggs – I remember the ajc doing a story a few years ago on a young lady that had maybe 2 kids as a teen that went on to finish medical school.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
3:54 pm
Wow, she didn’t know any personally, just didn’t like them. She has let the opinions of others sway her thinking toward a particular group of people. Much like the KKK with their little offspring sitting at their breakfast/dinner tables brainwashing innocent youngins who grow up with hatred inflicted upon them bt closed minded individuals without being able to form their opinions, likes and dislikes.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
3:55 pm
Leggs – He showed a side of himself that might take months, maybe years to come to surface.
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
4:01 pm
He did, kimmie. Besides showing he’s a spoiled brat who lashes out when things aren’t going his way, there are other underlying issues that I don’t need to be one of Pavlov’s experiments.
disco
May 30th, 2012
4:04 pm
leggs – this conversation is five days in the past and I’m still replaying it in my mind.
O/T – I just had a bout of “did I say that out loud?” lol. here’s to keeping my thoughts to myself for the rest of the day.
Bluzgirl
May 30th, 2012
4:06 pm
Leggs…I don’t know the whole story, but one phrase my friend taught me comes to mind…that’s a whole bucket of crazy you don’t want to turn over!
Leggs
May 30th, 2012
4:11 pm
Ok, that MIA is closed. Just wanted you guys to know the reason I was given for the chain of events….NEXT!
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
May 30th, 2012
4:17 pm
Hey Ladies-hope you all had on your comfortable skin showing clothing this weekend…we love it!!
As for the topic, this phrase from the intro says it all, “Chivalry isn’t dead. It just left and followed wherever “being lady like” went.
i'm swiss
May 30th, 2012
4:30 pm
disco — Well, since your neighbor puts so much stock in stereotypes, here’s a few stereotypes about her (and I bet these are pretty accurate): She watches Fox News & thinks all other media outlets on planet Earth are part of the “liberal, lame-stream media.” She gets
mostof her political opinions/talking points from either Rush Limbaugh or Sean Hannity. She’s a tea-bagger. She thinks the word “moderate” is negative, and that “liberal / progressive” is a synonym to “communist.” She’s a big fan of Herman Cain and Allen West, because they say all the racist sh!t she believes, but they’re black, so that proves she’s not racist.Over/under on how many of those I’m right about?
disco
May 30th, 2012
4:41 pm
swiss – I’d love to indulge in your stereotypes but I can’t say that I’m all up in her mix well enough to know her news watching habits and her political information sources. I will say that over the years she’s shared plenty of her business with me and she’s the stereotypical “dumb blonde” squared. she thinks because she dates black men that gives her an “I’m not racist” pass. I never thought much of her before but I think even less of her now and I told her as much. told her I’m going to start calling her “ms. there goes the neighborhood”.
kimmie
May 30th, 2012
4:46 pm
disco – she met the right one when she came across you! I’m glad she met up with someone that will give it to her straight!!!
swiss – they can be so transparent, so I would bet my last dollar you are dead on!
With that I’m out, gang! Be easy!!
Celisea
May 30th, 2012
4:56 pm
Alright WillieD, if tomorrow is still on…let me know. I can probably make it. Mom is now home, feet up and chilling