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What makes them attractive?

Women can never predict who will be attracted to them. Sometimes I am so confused when a guy asks me out because I wonder how he decided I was his type?

Aside from looks, what makes a woman attractive to men? I think a lot of women believe that good looks are enough to keep a man interested. Obviously it keeps them interested for a period of time, but something else keeps them around.

What is it about women that makes women irresistible?

Ladies, what is it about men that you find irresistible besides looks?

What keeps you interested and willing to open up yourself to another person?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

221 comments Add your comment

Lily

April 30th, 2012
7:12 am

Diva, frankly I’m not blown away over a petty face. As a matter of fact I’m turned off by men so consumed with their looks. Usually men like that have little else to be desired. Now, having said that I can appreciate a handsome man as well as the next woman. What’s attractive to me is a man of integrity. One that’s honesty and upright. Not a user, not always with a negative agenda. Keep your pretty face if you’re rotten to the bones. If came down to substance over looks, give me substance.

Good day!

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
8:11 am

Good morning,

Personality, great sense of humor, thoughtfulness,their opennes/candidness with me and most definitely how they treat me is what keeps me going for the most part. The best way i could probably put it would be keeping my “love meter” as full as possible. When it starts dwindling down past the half-full mark is where things start to get a bit hairy…

halo46

April 30th, 2012
8:26 am

Good Morning Bloggers. I am new to the scene so please be kind.

Honestly, my initial attraction is a man who possesses the confident, sexy trait. I can spot it well. I love a man who goes to the gym. Sorry but muscular definition turns me on! As far as the intelligent, well-educated, suave guy who thinks he can handle 4 women at a time, that is definitely a turn off for me. Please DO NOT pass me a geeky, nerdy guy. Although I have been told I am 20% nerd, I still find the engineer/sales types to be somewhat boring for my taste. But that’s me. I believe I am a sexy woman, therefore, I am attracted to sexy men. Of course, not all engineers or salesman are the same, there is always an exception to the rule. So I don’t count them out just because of their profession; but normally, just normally, they are not the one for me. Give me a strong, intelligent (not necessarily educated) man with a keen sense of humor, fun loving, handsome and sexy anyday. I am normally attracted to the business type.

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
8:33 am

Welcome Halo!! We love new POVs & personalities.. ;-)

halo46

April 30th, 2012
8:34 am

@SlimNu: Thank you. I appreciate it.

Huh?

April 30th, 2012
8:45 am

Since you’re new here why would you think otherwise??? That the people here would NOT be kind would not be kind???

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
9:00 am

Huh? – Maybe she’s lurked here before and saw some previous newbies get reemed…just a guess but we’ll see what she says. Apparently, we get a bad rep for treating newbies with a harsh hand. lol

czBrat

April 30th, 2012
9:14 am

Maybe she’s lurked here before and saw some previous newbies get reemed :lol:
i’m sure leggs will be in to issue vests shortly. welcome, halo!

Mr. Unknown

April 30th, 2012
9:18 am

Morning,
I think a lot of women believe that good looks are enough to keep a man interested. They are not wifey material thats for sure. Its becoming such a turn-off to meet a woman with no domestic skills. I learned a lot of people like the idea of paying for things they can do themselves.
I love the heart of a good woman. Love a woman that doesn’t get lost in the shuffle of a relationship. She maintains her personal goals and actually does what she preaches. If you were allegedly going to church every Sunday that shouldn’t stop because I’m around.

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
9:18 am

czBrat – Now i’m not sure if the rules changed but didn’t newbies have a probationary period to go through before getting issued a vest? I hope we haven’t gotten that bad where folks need them upon entry lol

How was everybody’s weekend? Surprisingly, my aunt, mom and niece came up from AL so I got in my auntie time. That little 3 year old is something else I tell ya that much…full of energy, talkative and is currently in that WHY WHY WHY stage. Everything is WHY???!

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
9:21 am

Good sleepy Monday morning!

I am tired…for real :) I didn’t get in the bed until 3:00 a.m. Sunday morning only to have sister call at 3:37 because my mom was having trouble breathing. Needless to say I was back up and sitting in the ER. I got home at 7:00 a.m. and off to church by 10:30. I went back to the hospital after church (since my sister stayed) and didn’t get home until late Sunday night…whew!

Anyway, on topic what attracts me and keeps me attracted is a man of substance. One with no appetite for games or have outgrown. One that understands risk is a component for the both of us and is a risk taker, alongside me. A God fearing man especially and being a looker never hurt either…lol I like attraction from the in, out.

halo46

April 30th, 2012
9:24 am

Everyone is right on target. I have lurked before and you guys can be intimidating at times, probationary period and all. lol and smh Shoot, even the question from @Huh? was a little offbeat.

czBrat

April 30th, 2012
9:29 am

celisea, so sorry to hear about your mum. i will keep her in my prayers along with the rest of your fam.

slim, i’m the last person to speak on rules & regs. have i given halo a false sense of hope? :lol: we’ll see if she can dip & dodge until she gets her gear.

lily kicked things off with a great post. this topic is kinda battered and bent, though. we all have our own ideas and ideals. just go with what works for you and your boo (or your boo target).

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
9:33 am

Thanks czBrat….much appreciated

abc

April 30th, 2012
9:41 am

The obvious: big teeots and a nice figure overall, long hair, fair of face. It’s not enough to keep a guy around — he has to be actually interested in who you are for that — but it’ll get us to look.

Mr. Unknown

April 30th, 2012
10:02 am

Hey guys on topic off topic,
I was out last Friday with friends after work and decided to meet up with someone for an impromptu appetizers and drinks. I wasn’t driving and told her that my car was back at the office. So she picked me up, the inside of the car was nasty and I’m being nice. She made a joke saying I know that I need to clean my car, I’m thinking this is really bad, like theres even a smell. I was told that I was judging to early because she didn’t know that she would be driving. Is it a fair assessment to think her house is nasty too?

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
10:10 am

Mr. U – You could make that assessment but that doesn’t always mean nasty house because her car is junky….like what kind of nasty was her car, outside of the smell anyway and I’m scared to ask what it smelled like :shock:

disco

April 30th, 2012
10:13 am

mr. unknown – I’ve seen that one go both ways. one guy I knew had a filthy car and a filthy apartment. another guy had a junky car but his home was on point. still chick knew her car was jacked up she could have saved her jokes about cleaning her car. I’m guessing that’s the permanent state of her car all the time.

by the way – good morning good peoples.

Mr. Unknown

April 30th, 2012
10:15 am

There was no place to sit. Trash covering the backseat. Heels everywhere, makeup bag, clothing and I guess food containers may have been the smell. At least I hope that was what it was.

czBrat

April 30th, 2012
10:17 am

mr. u, i don’t think i’d make that leap to assuming her home is nasty. lots of people practically live in their cars. my boss, for example, has crap everywhere in her truck but her home is an absolute showplace.
then you’ve got the folks who meticu-lously detail their rides inside and out but leave dirty, rotting sh!t all over the house.

i’m assuming this is not a case of “first impressions”. you do already know this chick, right?

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
10:18 am

Mr. U – Ewwwwww! Now it’s one thing to be a little messy with papers or stuff on the seats but when you get into leftover food containers, spilled liquid stains that look like no attempt to clean them up was made, sticky surfaces etc then that’s could very well mean a nasty home.

abc

April 30th, 2012
10:21 am

In my experience, sloppy car, sloppy house; sloppy house, sloppy mind. I’m not exactly a neat freak, but I don’t tolerate slovenliness. It’s like a joke: I have to wipe my feet before I walk OUT of her house!

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
10:28 am

During the week my car can become a bit messy on the lighter level…i.e..tennis shoes & workout bag for the gym, extra clothes bag & bag of toiletries in case I end up staying at the beau’s house instead of going home. But as far as old food containers, nasty wrappers, or other gross things, that would not be me.

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
10:33 am

Now my ex’s car was always messy as well as his house. He was the kind of dude that if he ate a plate of food, that plate would be in that same spot he ate it in until he decided to clean it up or until someone else did it. If the cat threw up on the carpet he’d let it stay there until it got hard. His reasoning was it was easier to clean up once it got hard as opposed to when it was still wet. :shock: I hated that about him…

kimmie

April 30th, 2012
10:37 am

Morning Peeps!

Welcome Halo!

On topic – Well, we all know looks will get you a look and maybe even a date. That’s where it stops though. Who are these wack people that actually think looks will keep someone around and interested in more than just something physical? I know there may be some young newbies reading this blog, but looks like we should have grown beyond having to discuss folks with such a superficial mindset. But that’s me!

As for what I find attractive – once one gets beyond physical traits, I like to see where a man’s head is. I love nerds with a confident, not arrogant, personality. One that’s calm and laid back and just handles his business. I like a man that’s well-dressed and groomed, but not in a metrosexual way. A man’s man that truly loves and respect women. I’m not just talking about one that has good manners around women. I’m talking one that appreciates and is not intimidated by a woman’s intelligence and opinion. One that knows whatever she brings to the table and whatever she does, he’s still gonna be his own man. Now that is sex and will make THIS woman eat out of the palm of his hand!

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
10:38 am

Off topic and just a bit of venting….

My friend that I wanted to have the position here, that was just recently written up escalated her issue…at my recommendation…but it didn’t go well she said. I’m so dern aggravated with her because I told her what to do…but danggit I CANNOT DO IT FOR HER!!! She called and said I told them I felt my manager didn’t like me BLANK STARE HERE…and that’s all. I actually had to hold back while talking to her to not hurt her feelings. But I got a bit stern. I told her “and, so what?” I’m sure there’s a gazillion folks in this corporation feeling like they’re not liked by their manager. I told her “I told you to take out all emotions and feelings and have nothing in hand but facts” Jesus Christ!! She’s was even whining and so soft spoken I could barely hear her. I told her look honey, you should be so angry by now that you can pretty much recall EVERY event that you’ve encountered from evilene that you can repeat it back. I asked her did you make mention that you’re now working two jobs because the other chick was fired a few months back yet required to work both jobs in on one day period? She said “no” Not that you can’t do it but if you’re stating your case would that not be a fact that you wouldn’t include?

Lawd Jesus I’m so tired of dumb bots!!! There’s soooooooooooooooooooo much more she could have done and said. She said I feel like the representative assigned to my case didn’t help me. I said she’s a third party and the onus is on you to show where you’ve been mistreated. Naturally they company is for the leaders they’ve hired to lead. You gotta show otherwise. I just hung up because I was getting close to scolding her. And really grown folks shouldn’t have to be.

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
10:39 am

Y’all gone back to your blogging…I just needed to vent!!!

czBrat

April 30th, 2012
10:40 am

i’m a stickler for keeping all of my environs neat; home, car, office, yard, you name it. a place for everything and everything in it’s place. even people who ride with me have been told “take your crap with you when you get out!”

kimmie

April 30th, 2012
10:49 am

Celisea – That would drive me up a wall!!! I would need to vent too! Trying to help someone that’s docile and without backbone can be just as frustrating as trying to help one that’s wild and crazy!!!

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
10:56 am

Kimmie – I’m just done…please someone stick a fork in me…lol I can’t do it no more :(

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
10:58 am

i'm swiss

April 30th, 2012
10:59 am

Morning, folks.

On topic: As abc, there’s initial attraction — which is likely almost entirely physical — and there is a lasting attraction, which requires a bit more.

For me, the initial attraction is typically: dark skin, dark hair, pretty smile, nice curves, nice round booty (in no particular order). :lol:

After that, it’s about personality, sense of humor, how she treats others, goals in life, etc.

Luckily for me, I hit the lotto on all counts. :D

Off topic: It was a very successful weekend on the tennis courts for me & my team. We entered Saturday’s match in first place, needing to win only 1 of the 5 matches against the 2nd place team to clinch the division title. I took care of that at line 1 with a 6-2, 6-0 win. Then we proceeded to take all 5 matches from the (formerly) 2nd place team to knock them out of the playoffs and secure home court advantage throughout the playoffs for ourselves! AND we drank all their beer, too! :lol:

i'm swiss

April 30th, 2012
11:00 am

Oops, should have been “As abc said…”

MissMoni

April 30th, 2012
11:01 am

Good Monday Morning All!!! :-D

As far as physical, I am attracted to tall basketball player builds. However, if a man is an airhead, then that is a total turn off. I love a man who can intrigue me intellectually, that I don’t have to water down my conversation for. Looks are not everything and can CHANGE in a moment’s notice. It all comes down to how he treats me. The better he treats me, the more attracted to him I become.

kimmie

April 30th, 2012
11:01 am

Swiss – So basically you just came in and slaughtered everyone! Good job, us DAWGS run everything, don’t we? :lol:

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
11:02 am

Swiss said….For me, the initial attraction is typically: dark skin, dark hair, pretty smile, nice curves, nice round booty (in no particular order).

So far, this is the post of the day for me!! I like a man that appreciates the chocolatte’

disco

April 30th, 2012
11:08 am

C / kimmie – I have a list of workplace offenses on the ready for if/when it ever hits the fan up in here. right now I’m in don’t start none, won’t be none mode but if it ever gets started cool believe I’ll pull out the notes.

C – I second that on swiss’ post however I won’t be hard on the fellas who are color struck the other way. light skinned chicks need love too. lol.

i'm swiss

April 30th, 2012
11:09 am

You know how we do it, kimmie. ;-) :lol:

“I like a man that appreciates the chocolatte”

C — Then you should loooooooooove you some me. ;-) :lol:

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
11:13 am

swiss – Congrats on your win win (Mrs Swiss & Tennis) but dang, did yall leave them ANY kind of dignity after kicking their butts and drinking their beer? Did ya at least let them get a sip each? :lol:

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
11:13 am

disco – So I’m not alone in keeping a “special” email folder titled “personal stuff with (insert manager’s name here)?” LOLOL….I love it

disco – Yeah I’m okay too sharing the love. I just have a “special” place for those men loving the chocolatte’

Celisea

April 30th, 2012
11:14 am

Swiss – LOL :mrgreen:

i'm swiss

April 30th, 2012
11:18 am

“did yall leave them ANY kind of dignity after kicking their butts and drinking their beer? Did ya at least let them get a sip each?”

Slim — Nope, not even a shred of dignity. Actually, the funniest part of the day was when we started cheering against our own team. :lol: We have this team rule that says if you win your match 6-0 6-0, all the other members of the team owe you a 12-pack. Our line 3 team was leading 6-0, 4-0, and the other team had a looooooooooong service game, which they finally held to get 1 game. When the other team won that 1 game, our entire team game them a rousing standing ovation. :lol: The other team had no idea what was going on… :lol:

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
11:19 am

I have a list of workplace offenses on the ready for if/when it ever hits the fan up in here. right now I’m in don’t start none, won’t be none mode but if it ever gets started cool believe I’ll pull out the notes

disco – This seems to be something that’s becoming almost common practice these days…especially with the economy the way it is and employers using the threat of fear/job loss etc as bargaining tools to get folks to do more than their intended job duties.

Mr. Unknown

April 30th, 2012
11:21 am

“If the cat threw up on the carpet he’d let it stay there until it got hard. His reasoning was it was easier to clean up once it got hard as opposed to when it was still wet. I hated that about him…” Its pretty safe to say that you never, ever ever ever ate there. lol!! We just started talking about two weeks ago. This was our second time going out so idk. I would be embarrssed to have anyone see anything I own in that state. Maybe its just me but pride of ownership comes to mind.

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
11:23 am

swiss – I thought about you this weekend when I passed by a billboard for some eatery that supposedly has over 120 taps of different beer. I cannot remember the name of the place though. Knowing you, you’ve probably been there lol

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
11:25 am

Mr. U – My thing is, even if she didn’t have much notice of picking you up, she could’ve very well pulled over prior to getting to you and put that stuff in her trunk…could’ve even stopped at a Family Dollar, gas station to throw an air freshner in there too. As far as the ex goes, I was the person that did pretty much all the cleaning. ;-)

i'm swiss

April 30th, 2012
11:29 am

Slim — Where there’s that much beer, odds are pretty good that I have been there. ;-)

On the nasty car / nasty house topic: I have to admit, whenever I see a chick whose car/house/etc. is that nasty, the first thing I wonder is how nasty is the va-jay-jay???? :shock:

SlimNu

April 30th, 2012
11:33 am

how nasty is the va-jay-jay?

swiss – She probably has used coke cans, old used rubbers, 2year old nuvo rings, unpopped popcorn kernels, leftover tissue and old tampons up in there. :shock:

i'm swiss

April 30th, 2012
11:36 am

Trying to decide which would be worse — unpopped or popped popcorn…? :?

i'm swiss

April 30th, 2012
11:37 am

I guess if it’s still unpopped, her cooter ain’t all that hot, huh? :lol: