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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Do you argue too much?

I have a friend who tells me that he has noticed a disturbing trend in the last few months. A lot of the women he has met turn out to be rather argumentative. He is not opposed to debate and spirited conversations, but he flat out refuses to engage in an argument about politics, religion, etc.

I am somewhat surprised that he has managed to attract or be attracted to someone who is argumentative. He is laid back, extremely mellow, and is not one to be excitable. Is this a case of opposites attract?

Do you think that there is a difference between debating and arguing?

Have you ever dated the type of person who seems to enjoy fighting, or arguing? Has anyone ever told you that you argue way too much?

I have to ask, I’m sorry: Are you a lover of a fighter?!

Happy Friday!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

345 comments Add your comment

kimmie

April 27th, 2012
10:57 am

Leggs – I HATED that scene! I wanted to SLAP her!! Hypocrite is not strong enough word!! I have NEVER been able to stand her since they brought her on the show! It irritated me that they had her sleep with someone as hot as Avery anyway!LOL!!

I felt for the chief, but he NEEDED that last night!! Poor thing! That just shows the fabulous acting – the emotions on his face, looking like he was going to back off. I knew he wouldn’t, but the show & it’s writers are just brilliant like that!

As for Scandal, right hand has definitely gone ROGUE!! Oh, and in case you didn’t see scenes from next week, I don’t think that’s pregger girl they are pulling out of the water. That’s just too obvious!

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
10:58 am

C regarding your 10:53 I know for sure I would have a flashback from my childhood and while I know I can beat a man down that pain from seeing my mother abused would come into play and it will be ugly across the board. My sister says the same thing. I pray I am never subjective to physical, verbal, or mental abuse.

czBrat

April 27th, 2012
10:59 am

kimmie. to this day, even though my kids are in their 20s, if they’re in the car with me when i go off on other drivers i impulsively say “mama didn’t say that!” after every f-bomb. they’ve been hearing that since they were itty bitty.

lol @ sassy “you gone learn today”. hilarious!

celisea, i’ve learned to hold things in long enough to determine exactly what i’m going to let out. i’m no longer into hurting people’s feelings or putting myself in a bad spot just for the sake of being spiteful. to that end, i try to temper my words, actions and reactions.
on a good day, i stay level-headed long enough to see the upside and focus on a positive outcome.
on a not so good day, i think things through long enough to really blow a gasket and combust everyone in the immediate vicinity. it happens. *shrugs*

kimmie

April 27th, 2012
10:59 am

disco – My sentiments EXACTLY on those two!!

Leggs

April 27th, 2012
11:02 am

Also, on Scandal, the Newbie helps make the show. She still has milk behind her ears which makes her role a nice touch to the show. The other lady with the long hair (reddish blond I guess), is a wolf in sheep clothing (I’m sensing).

SlimNu

April 27th, 2012
11:03 am

disco – My mom has done the ‘turn around while driving’ to pop my sister or I in the back seat. Why else do you think parents put the kids on the right side of the backseat…so it’s easier to reach them legs if need be lol

And you wonder why some of these kids grow up to act like they do. Look at their examples!

kimme – Yeah, did you see DMX sobbing like a 7 year old boy when they were talking about how his mother gave him up to the state or whatever and he said she never told him she loved him. Might explain a lot with how he treats his current wife. His first relationship with a woman, being his mother, was not a great example. I have to say, not to beat him up about crying, but I found it hard to watch him literally sobbing that hard. I felt bad and a little uncomfortable.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
11:04 am

LOL….@Cely
Chicken heads and Birls, y’all make my day everytime I come here. keep up the good work cause y’all got it together.

disco

April 27th, 2012
11:04 am

okay. since the men aren’t out in full force just now I have an off topic question. I know some of y’all wear mac makeup. I’m looking to get a new blush. I’m an NW43/45. generally do margin and raisin. any suggestions?

leggs – I accept that every character has his/her place. just commenting on how I don’t like those chicks. like if I worked there, I wouldn’t eff with either of them.

Leggs

April 27th, 2012
11:06 am

Celisea ~ on point. Your 10:53 is an extension of my feelings. That kind of hurt I don’t think I can get through to become a couple again. I can almost feel the pain. I can fake the funk on certain things, that’s not one of them.

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:07 am

Lady – That abuse ain’t no joke. My sister was with a dude and he was abusive. She’s been to the ER an all. Her girls were small enough to be afraid but big enough to recall. I lived in the same apartments for a small window of time, right across the way from her and I could hear him yelling and breaking stuff. When he was angry he would just trash her stuff. A frigid day in hades is all I can say…..

My relationship with my kid’s dad was the worst but it wasn’t a physical one….not like THAT. We got into a fight a couple of times but that was because he tried me. When it was all over with, he knew better for the next chick. Sorry but during that time I fit the “crazy” category. I gotta a problem with a dude not respecting me. For real. Now I know to not even be bothered if I get a whiff of a man and how he treats women but back then….heyal naw! I burned, bleached, broke, reported, did warrants (child support), snitched (he had fake license)…so forth and so on…I could go on but I won’t. And for all of that, I still couldn’t shake buddy for about seven years. LOL He was still asking to reconcile.

Like I’ve said before, only twice in my life have I been blind with fury. The first time was with him and it was all out war and NO HOLDS BARRED. The second time, I walked away :) I did. I let it go. I was hurt beyond hurt but I had to learn what it meant to not be reactive to everything and that hurt is a part of this whole thing. You cannot “get” somebody everytime you’ve been hurt.

Leggs

April 27th, 2012
11:08 am

kimmie ~ hypocrite isn’t strong enough, I agree. I had so much to say to her last night. But, when she sat in the hallway and said what she said about Jesus not liking her, I wanted to stone her myself.

SlimNu

April 27th, 2012
11:09 am

Leggs – I agree with you on not being able to keep it going with a person who basically left me out for dead and breaking my jaw. I’m very blessed to not have had to deal with physical abuse in a relationship. I hear that it’s starting even in middle school where boys are slapping, choking, hitting their gf’s.

Sassy Me...all SMILES :-)

April 27th, 2012
11:10 am

Did anyone see Couples Therapy last night on Vh-1? DMX was reunited with his mother and when he saw her he started SOBBING..and it’s like he instantly turned into a little boy. He kept crying and kissing her and at one point just leaned in and put his head on her shoulder. His whole demeanor changed. Errbody was crying (even the counselor). Even though she abused him growing up(that will be addressed in future counseling sessions) he still needed/wanted her in his life. It defenitely gave some insight into the mess he bacame and why he womanizes the way he does. His ex-wife thanked his mom for coming and said for a long time she felt like she was a mother to him instead of a wife. I was touched…

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
11:10 am

There was a dude on this blog argueing with a lady. It was strange reading the exchanges from a dude going back and forth with a woman on a blog. Calling her names and trying to one up on her, that’s Birly. I heard a new word and I like it.

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:11 am

czBrat – Your 10:59….exactly!! That’s where I am now.

Heeeey Blackfoote – What’s crackalackin!!

Leggs – Me either. I’m not easily broken but I dunno, I think that would be my threshold. Breaking my jaw and then leaving me in the cold NOT CARING what happens to me and you’re my SO/husband? That one might get me. After I get over that, that’s another kiss my ass eternally situation. Again, I could be amicable (I think) for the kids but yeah, I would be done with him. Oh, hedda been locked up for breaking my jaw.

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
11:14 am

C i feel your whole post 11:07 I could write a book! The title would be “Thursday” ;)

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:14 am

disco – My mama slapped the taste out of my mouth while driving…lol My brother was in the back seat and I was in the front. The both of us going at it. She’s already said to hush. He did but naw, I just had to have the last word. When I did, she smacked the taste out of my mouth. To this day he laughs so hard everytime we talk about it. I cried so hard that day because he was in the back seat rolling when it happened…lol

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
11:15 am

Sassy I don’t watch it but folks on FB give great updates its like I am watching it lol

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
11:16 am

LOL BF say it ain’t so lol!!!!

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
11:18 am

Hey Cely I like that word, Webster don’t have anything on you. The fellas may have to adopt that one and retire B.A.B.

Sassy Me...all SMILES :-)

April 27th, 2012
11:18 am

I hear that it’s starting even in middle school where boys are slapping, choking, hitting their gf’s.

I’ve heard about that…sadly I think they(boys and girls) sometimes mimick what they see at home, the girls sometimes get that thinking from their moms that if he don’t hit me that means he don’t love me( I’ve seen it)

Some equate that with love…I equate that with you being ready to leave this side…

kimmie

April 27th, 2012
11:18 am

Slim/Sassy – I didn’t see DMX, but Egypt played parts of it on V103. It was hard to hear, so I know watching was uncomfortable.

Not that it’s an excuse by any stretch, but a lof of folks act the way they do because of unresolved childhood stuff. The best thing you can give a child is as close to a normal healthy childhood as possible. If you don’t think you can do that, leave them in heaven.

Leggs

April 27th, 2012
11:19 am

@Slim ~ I too am thankful I never had to deal with physical abuse. I’ve witnessed much with my mother, my knife throwing sister and the fights my brothers got into with their women.

I’ve seen too much to tolerate any of it. I’m the poster child for “You can’t love me and hurt me like that.” Naw, can’t do it.

Sssshhh, sneaking out while boss is away.

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:20 am

Lady – Only the strong survive. I was VERY young and that was the ONLY time in my life that I went through a bunch of BS. I say it only take once to learn. You ain’t gotta catch hell a million times to learn better.

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:21 am

Blackfoote – Just help yourselves to using that word. :)

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:22 am

And I don’t know if I’ve told it here before but I got into a fist fight with his mama. :( My mama said you’re just out in those streets acting like an urchern, like you wasn’t raised with any home training. All I could say was I know mama but she put her hands on me :) All over me putting him up for child support.

Lady~

April 27th, 2012
11:24 am

SlimNu

April 27th, 2012
11:29 am

Not that it’s an excuse by any stretch, but a lof of folks act the way they do because of unresolved childhood stuff

kimmie – You are absolutely right…in watching how DMX interacted with his mother, it was as if he morphed back into that little boy still wanting the affections of his mother way back when. I think this show has probably shed light on some things for him more than he originally anticipated. He seemed to have calmed down a lot from when he first got there (probably drunk & high) So my hope is that he continues the sessions even after the show is no longer. He needs to work on himself and having a better relationship with his current kids becasue it’ll only continue the cycle

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
11:30 am

Sassy Me:
“if he don’t hit me that means he don’t love me”

I actually heard a woman say that to another lady. She wasn’t the classiest looking woman but yet, do you really want to be punched all the time. When I was 7 my sister and I would have small squirmishes and my dad saw us go at once and he cleared me once and for all from ever putting my hands on a lady in anger.

Sassy Me...all SMILES :-)

April 27th, 2012
11:31 am

but Egypt played parts of it on V103. It was hard to hear, so I know watching was uncomfortable.

Kimmie chile I was crying,too. But on the real, he seemed like a weight had been lifted off of him…he engaged others more, he was calmer in general and even looked different. I agree that alot of adults are acting out b/c of childhood demons caused by parents that they need help exising from their lives. I hope he stays the course and turns the corner on all of his issues…I think the test will be when they bring up the abuse and how he and his mom handle that therapy session.

SlimNu

April 27th, 2012
11:33 am

Sassy – Did you figure out what the reason was his mother said she was forced to give him away???? Seemed like they just breezed right over that part of the story.

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:35 am

Alright, I need to work. Though it’s Friday, I’m still required to work :(

Sassy Me...all SMILES :-)

April 27th, 2012
11:42 am

SlimNu what his mom said was when he was 7 he was acting up in school so bad that she was advised to take him to a place for “at risk” children…so she did. When she dropped him off, she wanted to say good-bye but they told her NO and to just leave cause it’ll be easier that way. She said she didn’t agree with that but did as she was told anyway. She said she could hear him screaming “Ma don’t leave me here” and it broke her heart. I think she was kinda impressionable and naive and she herself was in a bad head space at the time. Because of that he grew up thinking she abandoned him…and when she told him she loved him he looost it. It hurt me to see him sob like that but he needed it.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
11:44 am

Thinking back I used give my dad a good workout sometimes twice a week, dude would jack me up by my arm and hang glide me back to the whooping room. When we came out the room my eyes were wet and red my sis would be falling out with laughter.

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
11:46 am

wow Sassy!!!!

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
11:49 am

Blackfoote – How’s your mom doing? Hope that’s not too personal

Sassy Me...all SMILES :-)

April 27th, 2012
11:52 am

dude would jack me up by my arm and hang glide me back to the whooping room.

Well damn…y’all had a “room” dedicated to that?!…how fortunate. In my house the ass whooping started in the kitchen after a looong lecture and followed you errwhere you ran..lick after lick.

Yeah Lady, that was tough..

SlimNu

April 27th, 2012
11:52 am

BF – I can’t say that I’ve ever laughed at my sister getting whooped…I definitely didn’t want to bring attention to myself and end up getting one too. I guess it’s a good think I never had a brother. :lol:

Sassy – Oh ok, I had just turned to the show at the point so I didn’t see it all. I was surprised at how much her and X sound alike. Did you notice?

Sassy Me...all SMILES :-)

April 27th, 2012
11:57 am

I was surprised at how much her and X sound alike. Did you notice?

I noticed…they look just alike,too. Okay need lunch…

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
11:58 am

Glad you asked Cely she is cancer free now, she started her chemotherapy last Friday and has six more sessions to go. She’s back to her vibrant self like nothing ever happened, says she can’t wait to walk in the Susan B. Komen for cancer survivors. I was the one on edge the day before her surgery cause I had never in my life seen her sick.

Celisea

April 27th, 2012
12:02 pm

Blackfoote – That is positively wonderful! She’ll do just fine moving through chemo :) Keep us posted. We like those kind of outcomes :)

Sassy Me...all SMILES :-)

April 27th, 2012
12:02 pm

Good for you and your mom Blackfoote!!

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
12:04 pm

Good Deal BF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
12:06 pm

I am going to a BBQ @ 3 in Riverdale and I can’t wait to unwind and talk smack and sip on a drank! its been a long week!

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
12:06 pm

Sassy when that dude latched on to my arm there was no where to run……LOL

Slim1 sometimes my mom would get a hold of my sister, if she saw the smallest smirk on my face I would get a whooping anyway, she said I’m whooping you because I know you have done something and you aint getting away with it.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
12:10 pm

Thanks Lady’s, all those prayers y’all threw at us certainly was heard and answered. I can’t thank y’all enough.

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
12:11 pm

you were in my thoughts sir~ ;)

SlimNu

April 27th, 2012
12:16 pm

BF – Glad to hear about ma dukes ;-) And that’s exactly why i would be scared to get caught laughing at my sister.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

April 27th, 2012
12:16 pm

I haven’t forget the love the fellas showed too, thanks guys. Like I said earlier that love y’all spread is still flowing through out the universe.

Lady~Love will win the fight~

April 27th, 2012
12:18 pm

Happy Feelings by Maze BF!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;)