Why are titles important?
If you have been seeing someone on a regular basis, met friends and family, do you really need to call it a relationship, with titles? Someone once told me he does not like calling women his girlfriend, lady, etc. This has often lead to a big argument about why titles are important to women.
Apparently women need the title and the action to back it up. It’s not enough to spend all the free time together, if the girlfriend title isn’t floating around after a few months, there will probably be a big discussion about it.
Is it insecurity? Is it about laying claim on someone? Is it important to have the title of a committed relationship or is it the actual commitment that counts?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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163 comments Add your comment
Jeff
April 25th, 2012
6:47 am
I’ve been with my GF for a year and a half and we don’t acknowledge any status on our FB page. People that know us, know. People that don’t, who cares.
The specific reason why is because when you change your relationship status, everyone comes out of the woodwork like cockroaches wanting to know all the details. And neither of us want to explain ourselves to anyone.
People who have to have titles are insecure or controlling.
Lily
April 25th, 2012
6:53 am
Diva, I don’t think I’m so much hung up on titles however I believe any man truly committed won’t have a problem making it known. He shouldn’t have to have it hanging on his tongue neither a chest tag for me yet we both will know where we stand and both will be on the same page.
You kids had a blast on yesterday I see. On of these days I’ll have an opportunity to get in on some of the fun, real time.
Good day!
Ms.
April 25th, 2012
7:31 am
@Jeff- That’s not always true i have my relationship stat as “in a relationship” to stop the thirsty from inboxing or trying to holler…I don’t date folks online.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
7:47 am
Good Morning!!!!!!!
hmmmmm @ the topic……let me gather my thoughts!
Mr. Unknown
April 25th, 2012
8:01 am
Morning
This is such a long week, already! I agree the important people already know who you are in a relationship with but it brings a smile when I introduce my girlfriend as my girlfriend at social events and such. People that have a problem claiming their SO as their SO don’t want a SO.
Who really has time to concentrate on not calling someone that you been involved with for several months your GF. Hey guys, this is my friend Ms. Jackson, we hang together every weekend and have sex on a regular basis. So isn’t that your girlfriend.. noooo don’t say them words around here!! She my friend girl and we hang together and have sex on a regular basis. Thats still a title right??!?
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
8:03 am
Good morning,
I haven’t really ever had this issue with not getting a title…In my last relationship, we did the whole fb status thing but as previously stated, it brings on waves of questions if it ever changes. In my present relationship, we don’t have our status listed. It’s rather funny because if you looked at my page/pics, you probably wouldn’t even be able to pick up on the fact that I was even dating anyone. Sure we have a few pics but nothing that would say “Hey, thats secret agent man” lol
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
8:06 am
Mr. U – So would you say that if a couple is out around town and the guy runs into a friend, co-worker, family member etc, when it comes to introduction and he only says, “Hey John this is Christie..Christie this is John from the park. We used to play ball together”…does that mean ole boy does not want to place a title on it or isn’t sure what to call it???
Mr. Unknown
April 25th, 2012
8:28 am
Slim~ If John is introducing Christie to me as just Christie and knowing how we talk about females on the court, barbershop, wherever. I’m going to look at her as someone he just started dating or his jump off. Believe me, the next time John comes to the park he is going to be asked if that was just someone he was banging, so that we can laugh and find out if she is a freak or he is going to have to lay claim to her as his girlfriend, so that way we are not disrepecting her. At somepoint he is going to have to put a title on her one way or another. The question is why waste energy not claiming her in the first place. Hell its a win-win, you make her feel good and you don’t have to waste your breath explaining why you didn’t claim her in the first place.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
8:33 am
Let’s see, my boo, my special friend, my girl/woman or man, my girlfriend or boyfriend, my S/O, my wife or husband…………..As Lily sated a chest tag isn’t need but both parties know where they stand with each above title. The important ones will know and others will respect boundaries with how two parties interact with each other. I have yet to update my relationship status on FB and unless I marry it will never be updated. I don’t need society validation with my relationship status. I think its a silent understanding that I am seeing someone. Even some have inquired from pictures or just saying you seem to be in love (whatever that means just think they be probing) but my business s my business and I know where I stand.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
8:36 am
& as Mr U pointed out it does feel great to be acknowledge with respect when being introduced socially~
Row 125, Seat 11B
April 25th, 2012
8:43 am
The title should never be an issue…The actions should be all that counts….A couple can be married for 15 years, but if he is still on the town 3 nights a week and she still has a standing appointment with Mr. Do Right, then what does the title matter???? If I were in a commited relationship and I happen to be out and ran across whomever, I f they are worthy of an introduction, then they would already know based on how I live in my day to day, what my status is…..remember the old saying, “Actions speak louder than words”.
LL411
April 25th, 2012
8:47 am
“They” (important people) know who I am and who he is. So, introducing me as “given name” isn’t a problem… his eyes are twinkling and the person I’m meeting is smiling ear to ear and nodding
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
8:48 am
that it does Row~ you are telling the truth with a 15 year marriage and one party doing whatever and still fake the funk with a grand intro for his wife digressing………………..Actions are important~ but playing devil’s advocate within a marriage only those two titles are there regardless of behavior
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
8:49 am
& a wife could be out on the town two not singling men out as the cheater as it reads it could go both ways!
Row 125, Seat 11B
April 25th, 2012
8:51 am
LOL….Like I said lady, She could have a stading thing with her own personal maintenace man…
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
8:54 am
yep indeed! it happens!
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
8:56 am
that should have read too, two nights a week! smh
Thogwummpy
April 25th, 2012
9:12 am
I find that in relationships, women don’t like the titles…often are resentful of such. Then again, it could be that I insist on using the title “Most High Lord”, and hers is usually just “Wench”. Maybe I should re-think the whole title thing….. Eh, it’s fine like it is!
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
9:17 am
morning all!
there’s a difference in being introduced to someone who already knows of you and someone who is not “in-the-know” about the relationship. if s/o has already mentioned me to a friend or co-worker, when i finally meet them all he has to say is “this is the brat”. and, yes, the twinkle in our eyes confirms what they’ve already heard.
but running into a buddy at the park? of course it should go something like “this is my XOXO, the brat”.
if the relationship is sincere (as someone said yesterday), BOTH parties should want to define what they are to each other; not just among themselves, but publicly.
a woman’s joy in being claimed is no less valid than a man’s pride of ownership.
thanx, gwummpy, i needed that chuckle to kick off my hump day.
Bobby Petrino
April 25th, 2012
9:21 am
They are important because of how they bounce, how round they are, how they feel in your hands, how fun they are to kiss and gently suckle and how they way they amplify a woman’s overall curvature.
Yum!
Bobby Petrino
April 25th, 2012
9:22 am
Oops!
I just realized you said “TITLES.”
My Mistake.
Mr. Unknown
April 25th, 2012
9:23 am
There are too many people with that Jay-z and Beyonce complex. Trying so hard to hide the fact they are in a relationship or keep it a secret. Why? I’m not going to update my FBook status because my business is my business(not taking a shot at nobody). At the sametime when you update your pictures and you have a picture with your SO all hugged up isn’t that doing the samething. I mean really? You just updated your relationship status but with a picture. The real reason a lot of folks don’t put a title on their partner is because they are unsure/insecure about their relationship in the first place. I’m the man and as such I’m going to lead, if a woman senses fear and hesitation in me regarding the relationship she will follow suit. To many dudes walking around following their girls lead, for what?! I say beat your chest like a man claim yours, keep it moving.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:24 am
a woman’s joy in being claimed is no less valid than a man’s pride of ownership.<<<<<<<<<true indeed sis!
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:26 am
lol Mr U you are right in a sense but not hiding like Jay and Bey I think I stated on the blog a few months ago I am seeing someone and my close friends on fb know too along with family but no I am not putting in a relationship on fb either. its neither her or ther for me and that site was my point but let it be know I do have a man and I am his woman.
that was funny lol
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:27 am
meant here or there for me smh I can’t type
lolalee
April 25th, 2012
9:28 am
A title is fine with me, but what the title is is the issue. “Girlfriend” seems so High School, “lover” too sexutal, “SO” too weird, “Friend” too generic, “boo” too yugh, so then what works?? I usually default to introducing my man as my “friend” and let people figure it out. They will if they are at all observant, or if they know me and haven’t met him yet, they know what the relationship is already. As to FB, no status noted unless I become engaged or married. Don’t need nosey folks that I don’t know so well poking around.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:28 am
and let it be known……smh lol
lolalee
April 25th, 2012
9:31 am
Lady ~~ cup of coffee for you!
disco
April 25th, 2012
9:33 am
good morning. well y’all ought to know me well enough by now to know that I’m a bit “funny acting”. I’m not one for sweating titles in relationships like I’m not really one for sweating titles at work. a title is just a name. it might be a name that means something and it might just be a name for the sake of calling you something. either way, if it’s not disrespectful, I’m not tripping.
I whole-heartedly agree with the folks that said as long as the folks in the relationship know what’s up then later for the folks on the outside looking in.
my take on claiming – stop it please. I think I brought that up before as a pet peeve though not in this sense. I complained of chicks who constantly felt the need to say “my boyfriend, my husband” instead of saying his name like I don’t already know who he is. you can have that in the initial introduction but after that kill it. it gets tired.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:34 am
my other point is its like for some through social media there relationships have to be on front street 24/7 my husband this my man this we are so happy we did this we do that the housekeeper is coming blah blah blah naw I don’t need or do that its not important for the world to see how my dealings operate……i know yall get my point. lolololol
lolalee yes please with hazelnut!
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
9:41 am
Good morning!
I’m swinging with the grown folks on this one. No time to sweat the small stuff.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:43 am
lol C!
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
9:49 am
Good morning.
Hmmmmm, is a title important.
Dating girl (Kumquat): Hey Sweetie! How you doing?
Dating Guy (Sweetie): Hey Kumquat, I’m better now that I’m speaking with you.
K: Awww, that’s so nice to hear. I’ve missed you
S: I’ve missed you too.
K: WOW, we’ve been seeing each other now for a year.
S: It’s been a year already.
K: How come you never introduce me as your girlfriend?
S: Well, we’ve never discussed being in a relationship. Just thought we’ve been kicking it around for the most part.
K: For the most part, WTF are you talking about?? For the most part???
S: Calm down, calm down. I figured since we’ve never discussed being in a relationship, we’ve been very good FWB!
K: Standing at police station getting her mugshot taken!
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:51 am
disco on of my fb friends introduce and signs off Mrs. ________ daily even had a yard sale and did a flyer and printed mr and mrs ___________ will be cooking fish for sale and saying items please come! now who in the hell does that foolishness?!?
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:52 am
to me its just an insecurity to walk around with a billboard stating your title and position daily. ijs it goes both ways
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:53 am
selling items……..i meant
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
9:55 am
Hey Lady…how goes it this morning
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
9:58 am
discombobulated but present and accounted for lol sis working on a project and can’t do two things at once and my blogging is spotty today lol
lolalee
April 25th, 2012
9:58 am
Leggs ~ too funny.
Lady ~ I* don’t ever ever ever wanna be called “Mrs” anybody! I have a name all of my own, thank you very much. Plus, my man’s marital status isn’t revealed by “Mr.” so why should mine be announced by “Mrs.”?
SlimNu
April 25th, 2012
9:59 am
Leggs – funny
Most men I’ve come in contact with on a serious level, wanted to ensure we were exclusive. They brought it up to me because we all know boys don’t like anyone else to play with their things, especially if it’s one of those classic figurines still in the original box. Now if it’s some run of the mill, dime a dozen green army man that can be found in any dollar store, then they could care less who else plays with it
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:00 am
i wish i could upload that flyer to the blog lol maybe i will share it with C lol I was floored lmbao with the Mr and Mrs __________ is having a yard sale and fish fry! lolalee people are amusing with the points they try to make to the world. FB is an open stage of madness and illusions
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
10:02 am
Lady – Those are the folks that don’t know how to act or ain’t use to nothing or believe “a man”….in her case, is the be all to end all. Po thang
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:04 am
so today is coworker bugaboo day! sigh lol
Robert
April 25th, 2012
10:04 am
“Is it about laying claim on someone?”
How old are you people? Anybody who admits to using facebook to annouce their dating status is a stupid young jerk who has little or no dating experience. Men who use social media sites instead of good old fashion communication skills (listening, talking, writing) act just like women who have nothing better to do than play with their cell phones,tabloits, etc., and keep their fingers busy (ADHD). Real mature men do not use facebook or any other social media to annouce their dating intentions. Ladies beware of immature men who act like little boys (playstation, etc.) raised by their mothers with no fathers. Grow-up!!! Using FB to annouce your dating status is stupid.
lolalee
April 25th, 2012
10:04 am
gotta cut out, happy day to all.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:06 am
last one they flyer was so jazzy like a night club flyer! decked out ok i am done lol they are from my hometown so i guess being married and announcing it daily means they have arrived #shrugs
disco
April 25th, 2012
10:07 am
slim – not that you brought up the little green army men.
lady – bugaboo? they buggin who? they buggin you. lol. (sorry. it’s too early for me to be this silly but sometimes I can’t help it).
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:07 am
Expert Robert has spoken!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL I can’t stop chuckling ! smh lol but I agree FB means nothing to me as far as a relationship folks just being nosy smh lol
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:08 am
yes disco if someone else stands over my shoulders trying to tell me something I will scream a bit lol back off me please! lol
Row 125, Seat 11B
April 25th, 2012
10:08 am
OK…Hold up a minute……..When did The section on FaceBook that gives your relationship status become the end all to be all for where you are with the person you are seeing, doing, or commited to???? How about I update my status on MySpace or BlackPlanet and pass on the FaceBook???
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
10:08 am
personally, my work title is important to me because it also tells what i DON’T do. i know at least some of y’all feel me on that.
lady, you’re right. the argument can be made that insecurity plays a part either way. if you don’t advertise your status you’re unsure about the strength of the relationship. if you blast it, you’re posturing to make it appear so much more than it is. i say just function at your own comfort level.
i truly cannot stand when women present themselves as “mrs. insert male name here”. but i understand that they feel honored to do so. so be it.
ciao, lola!
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
10:10 am
Robeeeeeeeeeert!! Once again, you are the man…lol Okay I won’t go with calling folks stupid but FB really? Again, I’m sticking with the grown folks on this topic.
Robert, here’s your vest. You might need it. I see you bucking up in here and getting of the BAB list…lol Go Robert go Robert go Robert!!
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:12 am
row lol fb is ruling mark is rich b#*ch lol plus instagram will solidify with a photo that we are together forever LOL dry humor folks lolol
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:14 am
hey brat good points! I agree
disco
April 25th, 2012
10:15 am
brat – I’m sure you have a “legit” work title. I primarily meant those hyped up titles – you know the ones I’m talking about. the custodial technician and maintenance specialist/janitor, the early childhood development and activities director/daycare worker.
Mr. Unknown
April 25th, 2012
10:17 am
Why not …? I mean whats the difference, when you speak about something that you have a passion in such as school and the hard work that you are putting in each and everyday to get to the end result being a degree. Why wouldn’t you do the same for the person that your working with to create a future together with and the end/beginning result being marriage. I’m proud to be in school as a student and I let people know I’m a student. I would also be proud to be in a relationship and people will know that as well and they will know her as my GF. If she can survive me she has earn the title. People work hard everyday to earn their title. I guess I’m the only one that likes to celebrate my successes.
Why knock people in love, for being in love? I don’t get that… If people are so turnoff by the way people celebrate their relationship simply aviod them. Delete them out. Be a relationship grouch by yourself. People are so concern about how they come off to other people.
My time is up, got to goo! Catch ya’ll on the flipside.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
10:21 am
Jake – Where are you? Thanks for leaving the gate open. There’s a crazy air in here today….
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:21 am
to each their own and how you celebrate your own life Mr U. Not knocking anyone but I have an opinion just like you and I don’t have to be a walking billboard to celebrate love~
Row 125, Seat 11B
April 25th, 2012
10:26 am
OK….Next question….Sine I do not FaceBook, I have to ask…Can you do two relationship titles.Like I am married, but its complicated as hell? Or I am engaged..(But still open to change)
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:28 am
yep something like that Row you can make your status how closed or open as you want it to be. they have open marriage too or open relationship but you get my point lol
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
10:28 am
Morning Gang!
I’m with Mr. U. If you get all befuddled introducing me, then you are probably playing games. Yeah, it’s obvious we need to be on the same page about where we stand behind closed doors, but why all the incognito, the secrecy, when we are around others? Are you trying to keep it on the low so you can appear still available to others? What’s going on? I’d watch the body language. If he said, “hey guys, THIS is Kimmie” with a big ole smile and his hands around my waist – that’s cool. No title really needed, everyone knows what’s up. But if he says “oh yeah, this is Kimmie” with his eyes cutting around the room and ample space between us, yeah there is a problem!
If we are TOGETHER like that, what’s wrong with being proud of it and making it clear? Don’t understand how hard that should be unless there is NOT a clear understanding of where we stand.
Disco, I agree about these folks that overdo it with the titles though!! If you have to constantly let everyone know, then that’s letting me know you’re insecure or things are not so solid with you & yours. Which I really could not care less about!
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
10:31 am
As for FB status, really people???
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:33 am
row you can have two pages and profiles…….. but many have one and just virtually do as they please. if one is going to cheat it will happen with or without fb
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:33 am
kimmie I thought the same thing it means nothing
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:36 am
I have been introduced as ________ my lady, woman, girl even stated this is who I am with. I call it a relationship its definitive. My whole point this morning is I am not updating my fb status one way or the other my pictures of us are out there and folks in my different circles know accordingly. maybe I missed the memo #shrugs lol
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
10:47 am
Lady – My husband updated his FB status when we got engaged. It was so funny because I got this email from FB saying “Mr — says that the two of you are engaged and your status should be updated. Is this correct?”
I had not been on my tired little FB page in like a year and never had any kind of “status” on it! He put one of our wedding pics with the kids on his page.
I still have not “updated” mine!LOL!!
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
10:48 am
@Mr. Unknown ~ nice post. The one thing I do not get is FB updates on one’s relationship. For me, it’s a stupid thing to do. But as with most things in life, to each their own.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:50 am
yeah I remember you saying that before how you don’t go on but folks know yall were together prior and on yall away to marriage you aren’t on their daily talking bout and and Mr waiting on the housekeeper to come as we just got finish cooking……that is silly to me its understood you have a mate.
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
10:52 am
we all know boys don’t like anyone else to play with their things
you ain’t nevah lied!
here’s the thing, s/o has shown himself to be the type of man who wants the world to know i am HIS woman. whatever his motivation, that’s how he’s running this ship.
now, if ever i were to meet a chick i had never heard of and i don’t get my usual ‘titled’ intro, how hard would it be to figure out something just ain’t right? i say that simply to point out that any dude wanting to prophess your role in his life already knows he’s going to live or die by that.
as for fb, my status is not even part of my profile. all the posts and pix share the story with those who care.
disco, i will admit to laughing at some of the more creative job titles i’ve come across. i.e. director of first impressions? really? can’t blame folks for trying.
Lady~interesting.........
April 25th, 2012
10:52 am
i just feel its no secret that most folks are dating and seeing someone if they aren’t married. its just not important to see that via anything. you are grown do you and actions will speak louder than any posts
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
11:00 am
I thought the “Director of First Impressions” was quite creative (lolol).
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
11:05 am
Brat – My hubs was the same way when we dated. He didn’t shout it from the rooftops, but he made it clear to all that we were TOGETHER.
I understand folks that are more lowkey and private with theirs. To each his own.
At the same time, those that have to make it a point that titles DON’T matter seem to be the same ones in the “marriage is just a piece of paper” club, of which I never wanted to be a member!
disco
April 25th, 2012
11:11 am
one of my co-workers needs a “director of first impressions” in her life. y’all know by now that I think I’m the fashion police. today’s fashion faux pas is a pair of primary color (think play doh or crayola) straight out of color purple one size fits all celie pants. yep. not lying. every time I look at them I want to snap a picture to make sure folks believe me.
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
11:12 am
@disco ~ naw, seems your coworker needs a bigger mirror.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
11:15 am
Writing a manual of “how tos” ain’t easy folks. Whew, I’m struggling. I have to have my draft ready by Tuesday
abc
April 25th, 2012
11:19 am
The primary motivator and driver for a woman’s interest in a man is security. That applies to all things, including feeling secure in the relationship itself. If a man won’t say that she’s girlfriend, significant other, life partner, fiance, or wife, that detracts from her feelings of security in the relationship.
The primary motivator for men in this regard is respect.
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
11:19 am
kimmie, bottom line is you’re gonna end up with someone that shares your pov. if it’s ok with you that no one knows the depth of your relationship except the two of you, then you’ll be with someone who also doesn’t want to put that info out there.
disco, a fashion report recently said this season’s look is print pants. the ones they showed were actually really cute. but i can see how that look can go horribly wrong.
disco
April 25th, 2012
11:25 am
leggs – funny.
brat – for real? so you mean I can look forward to more of these hideous creations throughout the summer? should be interesting. I’ll have to work on my poker face.
O/T – I finally got around to emailing pics of my neighbor’s dog to the HOA and to the city. do I feel like a snitch? nope. will I do it again? you bet I will. I even requested that the HOA send me a copy of the citation when they fine her. I don’t think they have to but they seemed to be willing to. we’ll see.
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
11:32 am
disco, as long as they’re straight/skinny style with a solid top & jacket it should be ok.
no one is allowed to sport mulit-colored palazzo pants.
^5 abc!
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
11:41 am
abc – Yep, I agree. You have always consistently said a woman wants to know she can be secure in the mate she’s chosen. I totally agree
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
11:42 am
I do feel though if you have to wear a banner of your relationship and just not let it be seen through each other’s actions towards one another, there is some level of insecurity there.
DreamsMaterialize
April 25th, 2012
11:47 am
Morning
If a person feels that a title is important, then it is…to them. You ought to be with someone who feels the same way. There have been times I didn’t introduce an SO with the title (or didn’t introduce her at all) based on how much I valued the person I was introducing her to.
Fake Cat Shady Dog: Heyyyyyy Dreams! What’s good playa?
Dreams: (not this muphka) Hey.
Fake Cat Shady Dog: What you been up to? I ain’t seen you in a minute.
Dreams: (cuz I ain’t checkin’ for you) Been chillin. Can’t really talk though. Gotta get to this thing.
Fake Cat Shady Dog: Oh I feel you. Me too. Holla at me man.
Dreams: (won’t be doing that) aiight.
Dreams Queen: Why didn’t you introduce me?
Dreams: ‘Cause he’s wack as hell.
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
11:53 am
hola, paisa!
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
April 25th, 2012
12:16 pm
Hey everybody, catching up…and Celisea, I thought i locked that gate.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
12:22 pm
Jake – I think we pretty much got ‘em all caged. To be extra secure, next time put a pad lock on the door as well
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
April 25th, 2012
12:28 pm
will do…lol
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
12:48 pm
Dreams – Your skit reminds me of a time my ex didn’t introduce me to this dude and he was usually pretty quick about doing that. So just like in your skit after we walked away, I was like why didn’t you introduce me….come to find out he couldn’t remember this dudes name for nothing in the world or even recalled how he knew him but they had a whole convo about Man do you still talk to (insert homeboy names here) it was funny. I guess every situation is different
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
1:00 pm
What up, Dreams?!!
Slim – I have been there so many times it’s not funny! I have managed to “avoid” introducing hubs because I totally forgot the persons name! A little awkward!
Velonese
April 25th, 2012
1:03 pm
I haven’t had a woman get past the “dating faze” to get to a the title of relationship in years, too much teetering the scale in their favor, I am all about balance. It’s 100%-100% or GTFO! Good Day.
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
1:10 pm
O/T: I just hate if for the Hudson family regarding the tragedy that occurred. Now they have to rehash all the details and probably more than they care to.
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
1:20 pm
Afternoon All,
On Topic – much ado bout nothing. If it a problem then have the conversation. After that proceed accordingly.
Side topic – yall funny cause I don’t have a name now. Wifey refers to me as “My Husband” this and thats with the exception of close friends. Funny, maybe I need to have a conversation with her about insecurities. Hahaha
What’s up fellas
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
1:29 pm
Willie – I throw the “my husband” thing out when I want folks to know I have backup – like when I take my car in to be worked on.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
1:35 pm
Where is Blackfoote? Just thought about him. He’s been missing for a while now.
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
1:36 pm
Yeah, I do the same kimmie.
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
1:43 pm
Leggs – So you use your ex-hubby’s name? I don’t blame ya
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
1:49 pm
ok. shamelessly admitting i’ve donned the “hubs” title on s/o a few times in order to intimidate folks (car salesmen, mechanics, repairmen, etc.). does that make him a tool?
and infamous? amazon? kym?
i’ve pretty much given up on blue
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
1:54 pm
Kimmie – that’s funny. Double standard I tell ya. Men can’t say that in the greocery store or the makeup counter. We’d be outta more $$$. Ok in the corner for being caveman
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
2:02 pm
WD – C’mon now…I’m sure you all get your fair share of perks some kind of way. So you’ve never been in a store or somewhere trying to get help with buying the wifey something and the salesperson is so smitten with your plan that she throws you some freebies or something?
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
2:04 pm
Unless it’s the normal oil change/tune up, I ALWAYS make a phone call while standing in the dealership. I have an assigned service guy/man and for whatever service need he’s assessed, I usually ask him to excuse me while I make a call. I then ask for (insert man’s name here) in front of him and say “hey so and so says it’s going to cost whatever, sounds about right?” If it doesn’t sound right I’ll say hold on…”he says that sounds too pricey”
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
2:06 pm
WD – Either double standard or just blatant discrimination! Because sometimes its either let these mechanics know you’ve got a man to back you up, bring a man with you or risk getting ripped off!
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
2:15 pm
Slim – j/k bnr. But heyal naw. Not your Mama’s husband. Nowadays yall in the same boat. Mention wife or gf and they add 0’s and commas just cause its what she would want. Hahaha not complaining just saying.
Cel – that’s bout the norm. Soooo you bout booed up now? Bout time for you to come thru the barbershop. What’s hapn?
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
2:15 pm
Celisea – Funny, I remember this guy I dated once that was kinda hung up on titles – he was one who didn’t go for them, always vague about where our relationship stood, a commitment phobe. But when it came to me getting work done on my car, either he went with me or told me to mention him as my man/bf. I give him props for that!
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
2:17 pm
At this same dealership, I had to pay $1800 for a repair (this was on the car I had before my current car), yet when I got to pick my car up…AFTER THEY DROVE IT AROUND (so they knew)…..it was doing the same thing! Nothing different than when I had it towed there. I was livid. They tried to sell me some crap that they needed to order a part from Germany…I called crappery on them. I said I’m not paying another cent. I said I will walk out on Roswell Road with a sign that y’all take money and deliver poor service AND threatened to call Clark Howard. I said now, give me back my $1800 you just swipped my debit card to get or fix my car….today!! My normal service guy wasn’t there and some young chump thought he was gonna get over. Well they called for the General Manager who had them bringing me water and stuff. They drove around a loaner and my normal service guy called the next day and said she’s purring like a kitten…she’s ready
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
2:21 pm
Kimmie/WillieD – Funny how just the mere mention of a man in a dealership can get things moving along…lol
WillieD – Boo’d up? Let’s talk about it after hours. I’ll meet you in the barbershop….lol
Lady~
April 25th, 2012
2:23 pm
what a day and still have a meeting to go! O_0 wooosah what is poppin’ now folks?!?
Lady~
April 25th, 2012
2:24 pm
interesting~
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
2:28 pm
Y’all my manual is coming along
I’m pretty proud so far. I was stuck this morning but the thoughts are coming. I have a beautiful layout 
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
2:32 pm
Celisea – Feels good to do a great job, doesn’t it?
One of the regular car spots I go to had me cracking up one day. He told me it’s gotten to where they hate to see women coming! He said some roll in armed with more car knowledge than the mechanics and are on guard for someone to try to rip them off!
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
April 25th, 2012
2:35 pm
Hey Willie, they have no idea, mention a wife or s/o and get ready to be upsold….example, went to the Jewelers one day to pick up a piece, I had been looking already, knew what I wanted, then I said, its bday gift for the wifey, you would have thought somebody rung the bell in Players Club…shawty spenty the next 15minutes showing me other items, matching earrings, this and that…I played along cause she was smokin hott, “Don’t Judge, me married not dead”, then i politely told her no thanks, I came for that particular piece, and got the hell on…
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
2:35 pm
Kimmie – Yes ma’am it does
That’s funny, armed with more car knowledge than mechanics. Shoot you better be.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
2:38 pm
Jake – It’s okay to look and admire….especially if she’s smoking hawt…lol
Lady – One last meeting huh? I’m about to hit the hub for cupcakes at 3:30. To think I was the one at the beginning of the year saying I didn’t want to participate. Shoot my soup wasn’t good so I didn’t finish. Iz needing a snack right about now
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
2:42 pm
Funny how just the mere mention of a man in a dealership can get things moving along
yet i’ve learned that using “my big brother” seems to have no effect at all.
Lady~
April 25th, 2012
2:45 pm
hmmmm Asante Samuel to the Falcons?!? I want his jersey right now!
Go Falcons!
Lady~
April 25th, 2012
2:46 pm
C I am just glad its the end of the day the meeting with be a blur………I am ready to hit the softball field and walk some laps and listen to some good music. Iam over this day!
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
April 25th, 2012
2:47 pm
cz-that’s because the big brother threat only works in school settings, they know if a husband shows up, he is gonna be pissed because of the assumed disrespect shown to his wife, and they also know that this woman can get him to act out, if she got him down the isle, gettin him to grab somebody neck in there is a piece of cake….lol
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
2:50 pm
Off of what we’re talking about….
The lady that I wanted to apply for the position here called me late last night. She was written up so now she can’t apply. I so hate that for her because her manager is so dishonest and plays unfair. Remember I said she had been tossed under the bus? Well, yet again. She’s been placed to do research and now working two desks. I felt so bad for her. She was soooo upset. I told her to call the team that steps in. They are GOOD. She said she was going to call and report the mistreatment. She’s pretty much the whipping girl for that team.
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
2:51 pm
Brat – Yeah, I was going where Jake went on big brother – only works in school!LOL!!
Lady~
April 25th, 2012
2:51 pm
Peace out good folks!
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
2:53 pm
Celisea – Hate that for her – that kinda stuff burns me up! Now THAT is the kind of stuff I get upset about!!
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
2:55 pm
Jake – well played. I’m married but I aint dumb. Matter fact while you tryn to upsale that’s giving me another 15-20 mins for you to understand why I’m in here. Fangs may not be showing but the topic done changed from the upsale to a bid for MY time. Thank its a game, Herm Edwards hahaha
Cel – gotcha, no appt needed.
czBrat
April 25th, 2012
2:56 pm
lmao @ jake. well said.
i do look at my big brothers a little different since realizing they really won’t stick their neck out for me like they did when i was a wee one. good thing i done gone and got myself a man. lol
wow. so brothers will no longer pose a threat to the general public on my behalf now that i’m all grown up, but they will beat the dude to death if HE doesn’t do the job. as lady would say, interesting.
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
2:56 pm
you would have thought somebody rung the bell in Players Club…
disco
April 25th, 2012
2:57 pm
kimmie / jake – the threat of big brother also works in the streets. you never get to old for your brother to throw down for you. and, when you are grown, you can even use the little brother that couldn’t rep for you when he was small. and I hate to go there but when you get a certain age you can even call in your sons if you have to.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
3:01 pm
Kimmie – I was walking in the house, almost 11 and my phone rings. I knew then something was wrong. She sounded so defeated. I told her to not go down without a fight.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
3:04 pm
Big brothers? I have 4 and tons of cousins that act like my brothers. Yes yes, the threat of big brothers is alive and well. Grant it I don’t get into too many binds and fixes where I have to call on folks…I’m just saying though
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
3:06 pm
Bye Lady
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
3:06 pm
Celisea – There are all kinds of double standards & such out here. I don’t pay much attention to any of them because I’m gonna be me & do what I do. But workplace injustice – that’s when I get mad cause now you messing with my money!!
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
3:19 pm
Kimmie – So true. I wish I could call for her but I can’t. She’s 50 something and it’s high time she learned to stand up for herself. You’re right, messing with my money is motivation enough. Just all kinds of crap. Her son is in college in TN and got sick, manager wouldn’t let her go (and that’s a HUGE no no for this corporation), sister had been diagnosed with cancer and needed to be picked up after surgery, manager initially said no but changed her mine when she started crying…. I could go on and on with the stuff she told me. I don’t understand how she just allowed that treatment.
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
3:24 pm
C – They prey on those they think are weak. If she showed out one good time all legal-like and reported their behinds, bet they would not mess with her anymore! They don’t respect her. People will walk all over you if you don’t show some backbone or they think you don’t have any backup(like the auto mechanics).
I roll thru all calm, but some think I’m the calm before the storm. It’s best they continue to think that way!
disco
April 25th, 2012
3:34 pm
kimmie – once I spent days trying to think of a snappy, professional comeback that would get the point across that if I wasn’t at work this would be a cuss out. I walked a very fine line but I got it and I remember being completely overjoyed at the astonished look on old boy’s face. his eyes got big and he bucked back a little bit but he knew I had him. it felt like victory!
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
April 25th, 2012
3:36 pm
Willie-you read all between don’t you pimp…I left out the part where she gave me her card, and told me her work schedule the following week, sneaky azz broad….
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
3:38 pm
Jake – Mmm huh but you did take the card though right?
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
3:39 pm
disco – When you’re professional with your “comeback”, they don’t have a leg to stand on!LOL!! Love it!!
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
April 25th, 2012
3:40 pm
As for the brothers & cousins, of course they will kick some azz for you still, but that hubby is an on-call azzkicker, he coming right now if its needed….
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
3:46 pm
Jake – true that. I advise you to say no comment to any further blog ?’S.
Cel – great advice to your co-worker. She has to learn by hook or crook. Just being good mneans you are a doormat. You don’t have to be an a-hole but you have to grow a spine.
disco
April 25th, 2012
3:46 pm
jake – that’s what I’m talking about. I was just saying at lunch that I’ve got two teams of friends. the ones that try to talk me off the ledge and the ones that say “you bad, you can make that jump”. boy my instigating friends be keeping me hyped up!!! my peace-making, take the high road friends be ticking me off. If I ever get married I probably will need a peace-making hubby. I can’t imagine the drama that two high strung temperamental ready to go off types would bring.
i'm swiss
April 25th, 2012
3:47 pm
Afternoon, folks.
Like Bobby Petrino, I’m 100% in favor of t!tt!es. Can’t even believe that’s open for debate, but oh well…
And, Jake / Willie are right on about the up-sell (store merchandise and booty) when wifey/GF/SO is mentioned. What is it about a wedding ring that makes some of y’all ladies a hot & wet mangrove swamp down below?
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
3:47 pm
@SlimUno ~ sometimes, there’s a place for little, teeny tiny “white lies.”
@Celisea ~ it’s a shame how these dealerships thing women are clueless and they can run a scam on us. Glad you called them on it and had them back pedaling.
Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB
April 25th, 2012
3:47 pm
Slim- of course I took the Business card, I may need to consult with her on my next purchase….lol
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
3:51 pm
Disco – who you think you fooling. The high road dude won’t get past the sponsor stage. The dude you want/need will either be locked for knocking yo azz out or dead for knocking yo azz out. J/K bnr
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
3:54 pm
WillieD – Not to go to deep…but let me tell you…I worked under this same manager. While I didn’t abuse the system and did my work, I didn’t even think twice about her or the other folks in that group. Pettiness and scratching all the time. They just sort of know, Celisea don’t fratenize too much but by the same token don’t mess with her. I closed the door to her office and told her I wasn’t going to play any games, no gossiping with her….nada….none of that crap everybody else was do to scratch up in her butt. My reviews were always squeaky clean and well rated…lol I respected position as manager and kept her looped in when let her know when I needed to come and go but I didn’t play that mess. When I got this position and they needed her reference, I called her at home and plainly said (not as bad as it reads) that I was about to move on and pretty much, don’t screw me. I did. When I say she’s lowdown, she is low down. Just about everybody on that team is scared to post somewhere else cause she’s known for taking it personal and jacking folks up.
Leggs – I was so mad that they didn’t even bother to say, oh there’s another part missing. I guess I was suppose to just drive off and pretend I didn’t notice the problem was still there…nuh uh
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
3:57 pm
Leggs – I saw your Dillards deal the other day
Go on witcha ya bad self
disco
April 25th, 2012
3:59 pm
willie d – I know. you are right. what’s a girl to do? case in point. I’ve been worked up about a situation all day (in particular my neighbor and her dog – I’ve been thinking of ways to take a dog out or contacting a dog smuggling/kidnapping ring because some of those little pocket dogs are worth some money.) I’m all hyped talking about “I’m going to do this, I’m going to say that, she better not jump bad” straight up smelling myself as my momma would say and the old joker that’s been sniffing around is talking about “before you do this, before you say that, maybe you should think about this”. I told him he’s a punk. lol.
Row 125, Seat 11B
April 25th, 2012
3:59 pm
Checking out the convo up until this point and I have a funny for you….I spent 10 years as a finnace manager at a large local Chevy dealer, an I can say without questtion, that guys that go to service and to buy cars get ripped off a whole lot worse than teh ladies do…… The service techs start running down mechanic speak and alot of guys are to proud to say that they do not know what the deal is and BAM they get hit with a $1800.00 service bill for a $1200.00 job!!! Or they sit in teh office and get $500.00 knocked off the sale price and get 2 grand added to the back end…then they wonder why their payment is still $375.00 for a Chevy Cobalt…..
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
3:59 pm
Jake – Um…errrrrr…nice response. Even I can’t hate on you for that lol
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
4:04 pm
Cel – I gotta tell you I manage over 100 employees and I respect that 3:54 more than anything.
kimmie
April 25th, 2012
4:05 pm
disco – I don’t see you with a quiet dude that’s not assertive. One that has a “quiet strength”, kinda lays back in the cut with the voice of reason, but will show out if necessary – that sounds like a winner for you!
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
4:05 pm
WillieD – You hiring? Just kidding
i'm swiss
April 25th, 2012
4:11 pm
Totally off topic, I do believe I might sh!t my pants if I were one one of these flights:
http://www.cnn.com/video/?hpt=hp_c4#/video/world/2012/04/25/nr-spain-planes-land-in-high-winds.cnn
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
4:13 pm
Cel – how well do you take dictation? Just kidding (no smile, straight faced). Hahaha
Willie Dynamite
April 25th, 2012
4:18 pm
Ok folks good eve. Be safe!
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
4:24 pm
Apparently, I feel “think” should be spelled “thing” 3x I did that.
@Celisea ~ can’t wait to wear it. It such a comfortable dress!
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
4:28 pm
I am extremely glad it’s 4:30.
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
4:29 pm
And, as we can see, titles are important, especially at a repair shop Mr. vs. Ms.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
4:30 pm
WillieD – I know you’re gone but for the record….NO DICTATIONS!! lol
Leggs – Good for you. Feeling good adds to looking good
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
4:31 pm
I’m about to wrap it up and call it day..night folks!!
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
4:34 pm
@Celisea ~ I wear simple jewelry, but I may have to buy a nice piece to further enhance the dress!
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
4:36 pm
O/T: I’m literally cracking up over here. Just got a call from a good friend who said “guess who just contacted me?” I immediately said the name of the guy who stopped speaking to me because I didn’t give him any after 21 days of knowing him. Whew, you guys have no idea how hard I’m laughing.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
4:37 pm
Leggs – Go for it. I always just want a dynamo watch but not too expensive…lol I’ve worn Fossil for the last 7 or 8 years. Right now I have on one…time for another.
accessorize accesorize accessorize….go for it.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
4:42 pm
This is a message in an IM the dynamo just sent me….I am cracking up. She’s describing her coworkers
“….at all not around here anyway…. everyone is a burgular, to gain a few dollars and a title, a thief, cleptomaniach and about to miss the Rapture”
She swears she’s righteous, just a bonafied nut.
Celisea
April 25th, 2012
4:43 pm
Night for real folks….I am out!!
SlimUno...looking for my breakthrough
April 25th, 2012
4:44 pm
Looking good also helps you to feel good.
(I just didn’t want to feel left out)
Leggs
April 25th, 2012
4:47 pm