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Being frugal sexy?

I was listening to the Frank and Wanda radio show on the way to work yesterday. They were talking about dating frugal people and someone said that using a coupon on a date was not sexy. Seriously! Being smart about money is a turn off?

How does using a coupon kill the romance on a date, though? If a guy whipped out a coupon, groupon, or even foursquare check-in discount, do you know how impressed I would be?

It’s like some women have this fantasy of being wooed by wealthy men, and a coupon kind of jolts them back to “practical reality” or something.

Have you ever used a coupon or discount deal on a date? If not, would you be opposed to it?

Would it bother you to date someone who is frugal?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

215 comments Add your comment

Lily

April 10th, 2012
7:05 am

Diva, I caught part of that. Everything within reason.

n

April 10th, 2012
7:15 am

That is a great question. I really like it. I take a coupon with me every time I have a date. I remember my friend taking me out for my birthday. When the check came she gave me a two-for-one coupon and said, “because it was my birthday, I only had to pay for one dinner”. She is the only girl I know who hangs her dental floss up to dry. She is very frugal, when we go to McDonalds she checks under the take out window for dropped change.

Craig

April 10th, 2012
7:39 am

Someone who is not appropriately frugal is the type of person who will bankrupt you after marriage.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
7:59 am

Good Morning MIA!!!!

We ate @ Harbour Seafood (this place rocks) last week and I happily used my DoubleTake Coupon and I have a groupon to Loca Luna and will purchase any coupon if it truly worth the money. I wouldn’t look sideways @ a man using a coupon at all. I will inquire what company he uses and compare notes. I love good deals and these deal can be used for traveling as well. Saving money is always sexy while having a quality time.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
8:09 am

Being cheap though and whining about spending money on dates period is my turn off. Complaining 24/7 how women are just looking for a free meal and so on is unattractive. When dating spending money is apart of the equation and it doesn’t have to be the most expensive either but at some point money will be spent. I’ve never had a problem paying for an outing regardless if I had a coupon or not. And when I go out I always order what I can afford so either way I can handle the bill with my date does or not[……….and that is just common courtesy not to order the most expensive meal. how awkward is that. If the rapport is established and its that type of date then by all means splurge but just a date naw I stay in my lane humbly…….greedy isn’t cute

SlimUno

April 10th, 2012
8:38 am

Good morning,

I don’t see anything wrong with being smart about finances, whether that means using a coupon/groupon/meal deal or whatever on date #1 or date #25,987,656,554. If i’m not paying, who am I to judge them for trying to get a discount. Going out to eat, or for entertainment purposes adds up fast. So for someone to curl their lip up at the sight of ones use of a coupon is simply idiotic to me. Why pay full price if you don’t have to?

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
8:42 am

#1 or date #25,987,656,554 <<<<<<<<<<<<love it Slim!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
8:47 am

Why pay full price if you don’t have to?<<<<<<<<<<<<<< Amen Slim!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Many companies are meeting there clientele where they are financially and many consumers are taking advantage of it. Any savings help and for quality outings with 10 to 50 percent off is worth it to me.

SlimUno

April 10th, 2012
8:50 am

Lady – I’m just saying, a discount is a discount no matter what day it is right? lol

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
8:53 am

right! hell is there a coupon for gas?!? please share the savings bc I am losing currently!

SlimUno

April 10th, 2012
8:55 am

Lady – I think you can use your Kroger plus card at Shell gas stations…well at least the one in Union City does so not sure if it’s specifically that location or not. ;-)

GracieL

April 10th, 2012
8:55 am

If he uses a coupon of any kind, I’ll be watching to see that he tips on the FULL-price amount. If he doesn’t, I’ll sneak some extra cash on the table if I can. Few things turn me off quicker than a man who does not adequately compensate our server.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
8:58 am

Yeah Slim I use kroger plus card slim so yeah I do appreciate those penny deals.

dyslexicbunny

April 10th, 2012
9:18 am

I racked in points on 4x points on gift cards the last two weeks. I’m gonna buy stuff from Amazon anyway. Why not get the points?

Mo (aka Moeisha)

April 10th, 2012
9:22 am

I heard part of the discussion on Frank & Wanda the other morning. Like most of you, Im okay with a guy using a coupon on a date. Most people nowadays are trying (or should be trying) to be mindful of their spending. Plus if its something I would do for myself (which I would), why be in a pinch if a date does it as well. Like Lady said, I may compare notes!

Lady – “And when I go out I always order what I can afford so either way I can handle the bill with my date does or not”….AMEN! I do the same thing!!

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
9:24 am

Hey Mo honey!!!! ;)

Leggs

April 10th, 2012
9:35 am

Good morning.

Diva, I heard the conversation and thought of the blog and how we’ve discussed this. I am still comfortable with a guy using a coupon on the 1st, 2nd or 3rd date. I would not take it that he doesn’t want to spend money on me, but rather why not take advantage of the coupon (especially if it’s about to expire). Sure, it could be he may not deem me worthy right then to spend the $$, but it’s not all that important at that moment. He deemed me interesting enough to take me out. Go with the flow, enjoy the company, not the amount of $$ spent.

HST

April 10th, 2012
9:50 am

I use groupon all the time. Lots of times, as I pull in to a restaurant, I’ll check for discounts. Other times, I let those discounts help me choose where to eat. I’ve had more arguments about where to eat and coupons (whatever type) help make the argument end on good sense. I am financially independent, when women see me saving, I think they attribute it to my own savvy fiscal sense – it’s never construed as a negative.

Mo (aka Moeisha)

April 10th, 2012
9:50 am

Whats good Lady! How is the lil Lady?

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
9:53 am

Mo growing up with her own little personality!!! doing well in school and socially!!! how’s your lil man?!?

Waving @ HST!!! Gla you use Groupon too!!! ;)

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
9:53 am

meant “Glad”

Row 125, seat 11B

April 10th, 2012
9:56 am

I am calling BS!!! Guy is out on a first date and whips out a two for one, 90% of women put that detail in the fornt of the ” Why I will not date his BrokeAZZ” List!!! Now if you two have dated a bit, I can see that not being an issue, But early on???? COME ON MAN!!! You and your girls will clown that dude for days behind “Coupon Gate”!!!

Leah

April 10th, 2012
9:59 am

Love me some money-smart guys! Having worked in the service industry from high school through grad school, though, I’d definitely keep my eyes peeled to make sure he tipped on the pre-discounted price. :) Frugal is sexy; stingy is not.

abc

April 10th, 2012
10:00 am

I think it’s important to be a good steward of wealth, bestowed upon us as a blessing from God. Coupons? Sure! I don’t really actively collect them, but if it’s there, it’s there. If it’s a restaurant coupon, the server gets that much larger tip; if it’s a haircut or something, likewise. Is it sexy or not? Kind of a disconnect there. Chicks might respond sexually to stuff like that, but for guys, coupons do not equal big teeotts.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:01 am

Naw Row…………….lol not I said the hen! coupons are valid. Early on is just that………or later on they still hold value and your money is your money and how you spend it is your business……..seriously……a broke azz shouldn’t be dating period. get your finances in order….

HST

April 10th, 2012
10:09 am

Hello Lady~

I eat out so much that it would irresponsible of me not to use a coupon. I spend at least 50K a year on dining. I have got that to be discounted by at least 25%. I buy gift cards when the restaurant groups have their deals – I usually get $1 for $2.

Row 125, seat 11B, if a girl clowns you for saving money – it’s most likely what you did up to the point to of using a coupon – otherwise she’s a ‘biotch’ and not worth the time.

HST

April 10th, 2012
10:13 am

I should of stated that that 50K a year does include wine, bubbles and dinner cocktails.

However, going out to bars and having drinks is not included on the aforementioned part of my entertainment.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:13 am

I really wanted to participate in the Highlands restaurant week but it went over my head………….and Inman Park…….I really want to frequent RATHBUN’S but the time will come maybe groupon will do a groupon for them……..

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:14 am

HST that figure is realistic if you eat out and travel tip and mostly fine dining it adds up…………………

HST

April 10th, 2012
10:22 am

I do all restaurant weeks usually in ATL. Inman Park RW is an awesome event with so many nice eclectic restaurants.

I frequent Rathbun’s and it’s all that – I have reservations for the BBQ & Blues, I can’t wait.

I eat out so much now that I let the deals, local venues and suggestions tell me where to go. The biggest argument with my LTR (when she’s here) are over where to eat.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:24 am

yeah I heard great things about that place………..sounds fun HST and I know your mate appreciates your tastes!

Mo (aka Moeisha)

April 10th, 2012
10:25 am

Lady – Lil Mo is keeping me busy! But doing fine!

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:27 am

Good deal Mo!!!! I will be putting my lil one in summer camp @ her school. last year we didn’t do it but she has to prepare for 2nd grade so it won’t be a huge adjustment going back….I saw the difference in her not attending last year….so softball and summer camp are on our agendas currently as we end another successful school term. very proud of her!

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:30 am

I want to do Destin again this year but explore Ft. Walton Beaches more and see the city so I need to look @ some deals for that…………

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:32 am

speaking of which while there last year they gave coupons to some great eateries and I use two of them and ate great so coupons are really becoming a way of life if you will………….#shrugs

sounds like I am beating a dead horse here too #chuckle

HST

April 10th, 2012
10:43 am

They really are – smart phones have made it easier – it almost seems ignorant to not use coupons. Every hip restaurant has come up on for me Groupon just about. Then again, some places just aren’t discounting their dining no matter what.

If I’m considered frugal for saving minimum of 1k a month off 4k…I’m OK with that statement. An extra 12k a year is a difference in lifestyle some way.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
10:47 am

yep…………..

Jake a.ka. Sweet Peeda Jeeda TWB

April 10th, 2012
10:57 am

“I am calling BS!!! Guy is out on a first date and whips out a two for one, 90% of women put that detail in the fornt of the ” Why I will not date his BrokeAZZ” List!!!”

I think Row was right on that statement, but being frugal is responsible. “You will never have money, if you spend it all”

Head Nod fellas, Hey Ladies…and a special hello to my lady from the Eastside, whats up Mo, where you been baby?

Bluzgirl

April 10th, 2012
11:01 am

I have no problem with a date using a coupon, as long as he tips on the full amount. These days, we have to be frugal with our money. Previous guys I dated haven’t been able to afford to take me out to a nice restaurant. Please God let the next one be able to take me somewhere nice!!! LOL

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
11:07 am

I think I am catching Wednesday Wind Down tomorrow. I didn’t catch any last year…….some subway and a lawn chair and some chardonnay. an inexpensive outing with free music. #winning

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
11:07 am

The PR Experience-Live at Sweet Georgia’s Juke Joint <<<<<<This band is hot too!

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
11:08 am

think the date is the 13th for that show too

Just Saying

April 10th, 2012
11:14 am

I appreciate a woman who wants me to save some money. it just speaks highly of her character and personality. It lets me know that she understands the value of money and she will most likely stand by my side when things go rough or most likely help manage our finances and make sure we dont go broke.

Row — I agree that most girls will probably clown u if u use a coupon but who cares its my money. if the girl has a problem with it, why dont she tell the waiter she wants to be a fool and pay the full price for the meal. ( Probably the last time she would ever hear from me again)

Celisea

April 10th, 2012
11:24 am

Nothing wrong with holding on to a dime or two but a dude using coupons in the name of “saving money” won’t exactly impress. But not for the reasons though some may think. So hold you’re “calling BS” until I’m done.

If it’s totally about saving, then I think in terms of not eating out at all or having shoes repaired rather than buying new ones. Especially if they still have a bit of wear left. …just to name a couple of examples. I think of being able to get creative with meals at home, with a nice ambiance in the backdrop. I think of keeping with only getting the things one needs rather than getting things you don’t…on sale or at a discounted price. If saving is your plight or journey, your SO would totally understand but coupons ain’t exactly the path I deem “the route to save.”

So you see, I’m personally not impressed with saving a buck or two by way of groupon or coupons because really if you can do without…all the way, you aren’t REALLY saving?

And frankly Frugal is not a bad word if being frugal you are. If it’s the miser thing going on then umm yeah that’s cheesy. I’m not trying to be the contrarian here but coupons aren’t exactly what I consider the best path to saving up a million.

I wouldn’t be mad though if a dude used, I just wouldn’t see it as him “saving”

Bluzgirl

April 10th, 2012
11:25 am

Lady…who’s playing tomorrow? My friend, Lola, played last week’s Wed Wind Down. I wish I lived/worked down there so I could go to those events.

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
11:30 am

I see your point C…….I look @ like a great deal if you will…….savings hmmmm hit or miss bc you till have to tip and prob may exceed the coupon amount and have a balance and I do that often (did it @ Harbour Seafood) the drinks were great but I see your point honey lol

kimmie

April 10th, 2012
11:30 am

Morning All!

What is unattractive is, like Lady said, guys that whine about spending money on a date and are cheap and moan about women wanting a free meal. Dudes want free & easy booty too – don’t hear em whining about that!LOL!! If you can’t afford to date, don’t, pure and simple.

A financially responsible dude is sexy, pure and simple. I’ve seen dudes that barely pull an average salary able to manage their money and stretch a dollar better than some dudes making six figures.

The main thing with this particular topic, I feel, is FINESE! Just because you are frugal it doesn’t mean you make everyone around you uncomfortable and feel deprived or unworthy. Be smooth about it. If a coupon allows you to take your date to Bones for the same price you would pay at Applebees, what’s the issue? If when we walked into the restaurant and the 1st thing you announce to the waitstaff is “hey, I’ve got a coupon, is that okay?” that’s not smooth. The smooth thing to do would be to call ahead when you make reservations and ask about the coupon. Then when the bill comes, you slip it in along with payment and let the waiter know you cleared it earlier when you made the reservation. No need to make a major issue out of it. You would not make an issue of the bill if you didn’t have a coupon, right? I don’t make an issue out of coupons when I use them at any establishment!! Coupons, gift cards, what’s the big deal?

There is a classy way to do anything!!!

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
11:32 am

@Bluz April 11 – Infinity Show Band for WWD

Celisea

April 10th, 2012
11:33 am

Hey Lady – :)

I only said that because most will crucify a woman that’s won’t agree or hop on board in the coupon great debate…lol

I’m down with saving but if we are going to save, then let’s do it for real. Don’t come on here talking about a woman ain’t by your side because she ain’t screaming “hercules hercules” when you whip out the coupon. Make me a meal at home and sit me down and romance me….in the name of saving. Talk about screaming “hercules hercules” I’m just saying some folks just need a reason to point fingers. So you drop me as your woman because I’m not elated over your book of coupons and say I’m not by your side? Please. Okay, drop me then…lol

Lady~

April 10th, 2012
11:35 am