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Archive for February, 2012

Love, Not Actually

Imagine being on a date on the supposedly most romantic night and someone drops the L-word on you. Imagine the awkwardness of the moment when you don’t say it back!

People use the word love rather frivolously. I love chocolate. I love the show Fringe. When it comes to true love, do you say it when you feel it? Do you say it when you are unsure?

Have you ever been in a new relationship and got caught up in the moment and told someone you loved them?

What would you do if someone you had “strong feelings” for professed love way too soon?

Yesterday we talked about how will you know, but what do you do when you know for sure that you are not in love…and they are?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Love, Not Actually »

How will I know?

Whitney Houston, may she rest in peace, sang the music that many of us grew up on. Her songs are the soundtracks to my first love, first heartbreak, first restraining order (don’t ask) – and her voice got me through a lot of tough times.

I remember going through those emotions of being uncertain about a guy. I think looking back, that is exactly how he wanted it – uncertain. Have you ever fallen for someone who was not forthcoming about how they felt about you? It’s not the best position to be in and they end up having a lot of “power” in the relationship. If someone wants power in a relationship, that is a clear sign there is a problem.

You should not have to wonder or question how someone feels about you. When it feels like a big guessing game, it’s because someone is playing one.

How will you know when someone has good intentions?

If you are in love, falling in love, or are seriously smitten with someone, what do you do to show them?

Happy Valentine’s Day to those …

Continue reading How will I know? »

Attraction: Who gets our attention? Time?

I read somewhere that the type of woman that gets a man’s attention is not always the same type that gets his time. I have witnessed men gawk at the sexy vixen who is turning heads, but is that the type he will end up with though?

I know I can notice a edgy guy who looks like he is a total heart breaker, but would I actually take that type seriously? Probably not! This makes me wonder if we ever really know for sure when the type of attraction we have to people is the kind that will last longer than 72 hours.

When you consider the type of person who makes you sit up and take notice, do you think that person is someone you could actually be around?

Should we trust our initial attraction to pick the person we should pursue?

How do you decide who gets your time after they get attention?

Continue reading Attraction: Who gets our attention? Time? »

Ex files: Reunite or never go back?

I know this coupled up holiday can sometimes have an effect on you. You see red hearts and romance reminders everywhere you look. You can’t make a trip to the grocery store or even the gas station!

These kind of reminders that you are single can make you feel vulnerable, lonely, and a little “randy”. This is when you may consider checking back in with those exes. Or you may even hear from your ex out of the blue. It’s usually the exes that are no good for us but we never truly get out of our systems. Yeah, that one.

What do you do? Is it ever a good idea to reunite with an ex? Is this the time of year to do it?

Have you ever looked up a former flame to offer a little “solace” from a sad Valentine’s Day?

Do you ever feel that you have unfinished business with someone from your past? Would you reunite or decide to never go back?

Happy Friday!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Ex files: Reunite or never go back? »

Lingerie a risky gift?

That so called “romantic holiday” that is less than a week away has some people all in a tizzy. When you are in the “casual dating” stage, things may be a little confusing on which way to go. What do you do when you aren’t exclusive, but definitely more than just friends, and headed toward romance?

One reader wants to know if he should purchase lingerie for a woman he has feelings for and wants to let her know. I don’t think lingerie is a good gift idea for someone you are just dating. It can be a risky option since it sort of screams “I want to see you in it for about 30 seconds” – which may be the point, but is it the right time?

Are their certain gifts that you should definitely steer clear from just to be safe?

Have you ever given or received lingerie or sexy items as a gift from someone you were seeing? How did you/they react?

What is the sexiest thing someone has ever given you?

A guy once gave me a porn video. Seriously, he literally gift wrapped the thing! I’m no …

Continue reading Lingerie a risky gift? »

Seduction not a one way street

A male reader wants to know why some women don’t feel the need to seduce their men. From his experience, he is always the one that initiates romance. Why is it important for women to seduce men?

I ask because I know some men have a thing about gender roles, especially when it comes to the bedroom. When a woman is the initiator, should she be concerned about how she goes about it? Is it there ever a concern about emasculating a man while trying to seduce him?

What do you think? What is your definition of seduction? Should seduction work both ways?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Seduction not a one way street »

Single files: Love living alone?

I read a recent NY Times article that said single people are relishing living alone..a lot:

“More people live alone now than at any other time in history. In prosperous American cities — Atlanta, Denver, Seattle, San Francisco and Minneapolis — 40 percent or more of all households contain a single occupant”

Count me in that “living alone and probably loving it waaaay too much” number because I have literally spent an entire weekend alone on my couch before – and loved it.

Just as the article states, single people living alone have a pretty active social life. We come home and relish our space as well as the peace and quiet. Perhaps this in some way becomes yet another barrier to any of us actually settling down?

Does the thought of sharing your “castle” make you want to prolong your single life? Do we get too comfy in our homes to give it up?

If you live alone, what is the best part of it? What is the worst?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating …

Continue reading Single files: Love living alone? »

Dating: Scoring extra points?

Congratulations to the New York Giants! What a game that was, right? I am soo going to miss football though. So much so that you will have to humor me with this “game” themed post today.

If dating is a game, then who is keeping score? When it comes to sizing each other up, single people sure know how to assign extra points for the most random things.

For instance, I know a woman who agreed to go out with a guy because his car’s license plate was supporting Breast Cancer. I met a guy last night who asked a woman out because she mentioned that she was a gymnast in college. I know, random! (Also, blatant wishful thinking)

Apparently we meet and scrutinize one another because we believe that little things can add up to a lot. So what seemingly small thing are you impressed by? What is the most random reason you decided to ask someone out or agree to date someone?

Do you think that people meet you and give you “extra” points about something you do or say? Spill it!

Happy …

Continue reading Dating: Scoring extra points? »

We met on a plane

A new website was created specifically for those of us who have a “missed connection” mid-air. You’re on the plane and you notice someone that sparks your interest. Maybe time, space, or opportunity did not allow you to get their number. What do you do?

Well one guy decided to devote an entire website for these situations with We Met On A Plane: “Have you ever met that special someone on a plane but for whatever reason you didn’t end up exchanging your contact details with each other and later regretted it?”

I could have used this last spring! I was on a flight to Boston for a job interview. I was super nervous and this really handsome man was my seatmate. He talked me off my anxiety cliff, reassured me, and gave me a lot of great words of encouragement.

If I had paid closer attention, I would have asked for his name so I could have thanked him later! Who knows what can happen from our random encounters in the “friendly skies” – you really never know!

Has this ever happened …

Continue reading We met on a plane »

Looks or Personality?

Have you ever been faced with the dating dilemma of picking looks over personality? I didn’t realize this is so commonplace, but a couple of my guy friends tell me they deal with this all the time. They may meet two women they are attracted to and will pursue both for a period of time. Then they have figure who they are attracted to the most.

My friend Brad says that often times the personality enhances a woman’s looks, but there are times when it does not. He has noticed that a bad attitude on a good looking woman can become tiresome…”eventually”, that is.

How do you rank personality and looks in importance?

Have you ever picked looks over personality and regretted it later? Did you ever date someone because of their personality and passed up a more physically attractive person?

It may seem like a shallow question, but can your looks make up for a less then stellar personality?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Looks or Personality? »