Ex Files: Rebounding necessary?
According to entertainment reports, singer Rihanna has become a moth to Chris Brown’s flame. Apparently, the two collaborated on two songs and he was even spotted at her birthday bash.
Reading about their reunion made me think about those exes that we can’t get out of our system. It is tough when we should be moving on but are too hung up on someone. Maybe the only way to nudge you along is to find a new person right away.
People often take time after break ups to heal or to regroup, but maybe some of us could actually benefit from a love-life palate cleanser. Someone to distract us from dwelling on the recent break up and prevent us from sliding back to a bad habit or toxic relationship.
I think I have had some of my best dates with guys who were the rebounders – because I welcomed the attention and just appreciated the company. There was no pressure to move things along to the next level, so the only goal was to laugh and have fun.
When you are dating someone new, do you ever ask when their latest relationship ended?
Do you want to know if you are the first post-break up/divorce date? Would it change how you perceived their potential?
Happy Friday!
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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417 comments Add your comment
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
February 24th, 2012
10:11 am
Light I’m a city boy with a lot of country in me. Sausage crossaints with cheese and eggs or bone in ham steaks, big bowl of grits with red eye gravy and tall glasses of o.j.
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:12 am
kimmie what is scandal about (or is it the obvious)
cba
February 24th, 2012
10:15 am
EX: you and I share the same bd, I put my tag on the 16th. I have a brother who’s bd is Oct 17 and he thought like you and got a ticket……READ THE FINE PRINT
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:16 am
cba knock on wood I got away with it for 30 days lol but lately I have been paying on time
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:17 am
frankly I plan to pay mine in March so August it won’t be a concern…trying something new!
Leggs
February 24th, 2012
10:19 am
“What’s this crap then about ”Healing?’ all because a chic u supposedly ‘loved’ benched U or u benched her?” – Dang, Ex, you make is sound like one need to be a robot to effectively date. We have feelings and those feelings sometimes get pinched, stomped on, even blasted with what feels like a Magnum 57!
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:20 am
i see no one has mention the obvious of Chris B and Rhi Rhi…………
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:22 am
CB attempted to do the OJ in Fla recently…….. http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1679824/chris-brown-phone-theft-accused.jhtml
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:23 am
someone made a good point that he continues to give the media reasons to always point back to his anger and further justify why he shouldn’t hook back up with his ex Rhi Rhi
cba
February 24th, 2012
10:25 am
Keep playing with fire Ms Lady, you going to be sobbing like Ex (lol).
Since my wife’s car is in my name, every year I have to repeat, repeat, deadline 17th not 28th.
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:26 am
LOL cba that was in 06 (THE WORST YEAR OF MY LIFE) LOL its been better sir! LOL
Leggs
February 24th, 2012
10:27 am
It was hysterical about Zola’s hair. He was so proud when he was talking about knowing about the “kitchen.”
Anika Noni Rose was fabulous, especially all her mannerisms when looking at the constellations. Hell, that was a lot to remember and deliver with feeling. Boy, when she fell through that glass…..Love, love, PP!!!
WTH is red eye gravy????
Leggs
February 24th, 2012
10:27 am
Is it Magnum 357????
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:27 am
i didn’t get a ticket though mama says God takes care of babies and fools and to figure out which one I was! LOL it irked her to no ends! lol
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:28 am
leggs I don’t like any gravy on my grits but its a southern thing lol i am not even a fan of shrimp and grits….I like grits with salt pepper and butter simple lol
kimmie - the original :)
February 24th, 2012
10:28 am
Lady – Scandal is a political drama, set in DC. Kerry Washington stars in it and she is a “crisis manager”. She & her team can make the troubles of the rich and powerful go away.
Leggs
February 24th, 2012
10:30 am
I’ve never seen anyone put gravy on grits. I eat my grits the way you do. Never undestood sugar. Heck, you might as well eat some Cream of Wheat.
disco
February 24th, 2012
10:30 am
hey y’all. I was waiting on the rebound topic to change. I also just stabbed myself with a pen. not a poke but with some serious force behind it. (thought I was jamming the pen into the cap only I missed the cap – jeez).
blackfoote – I could go for some grits. loves me some grits but I’ll pass on the gravy thought. just butter, salt and pepper for me.
chris brown/rihanna. if I have to pick sides I side with chris. I just like him more than I like rihanna. I like his singing and he’s a passable actor. not really good but I don’t mind watching him try. rihanna seems way hyped up to me, I don’t understand what the fuss is about her. also, even if he is a bad boy and even if every single negative thing the media says about him is true I’d put more blame on her for being with him than I ever would on him for being the way he is.
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:30 am
oh yes ma’am I will tune in to that! thanks kimmie!!!!!!! need some good solid tv like that! I miss Boston Legal and ally mcbeal…….lol
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:33 am
yep leggs! I don’t like the gravy sausage biscuit either gravy and breakfast doesn’t jive with me at all lol
Just saying
February 24th, 2012
10:34 am
Audra – Leave Chris Brown alone. Allow him to learn from mistakes and move on. It’s not your place to crucify him. Nothing is worst than people that are happy to see others fail or fall. He’s a young man with his life ahead of him and obviously in dire need of help. I don’t advocate abuse by any means in any sort of way but finding help is a better resolute than stamping him out.
Bluzgirl
February 24th, 2012
10:34 am
Was just reminded of something with the talk of Magnum! LOL! My friend who is recently divorced carries a Magnum and we joke that if the guy can’t fit in it, he gets nothing!
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:35 am
disco the media says women who support CB are enablers of him……lol
cba
February 24th, 2012
10:35 am
Red eye gravy = grease from a thick slice of cured country ham…..ham from the smokehouse
disco
February 24th, 2012
10:36 am
leggs – my other side of the family does grits with sugar. as a child I ate grits that way quite often. just don’t do it now. i also used to eat corn bread and milk mixed together a lot as a child. haven’t had it in ages though.
lady – I’ve been known to plan entire meals around a desire for some gravy.
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:36 am
oh wow I didn’t even see that Audra post! wow I was not stiring the pot lol
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:36 am
yeah gravy for dinner disco! i love gravy don’t get me wrong but not 1st thang in the AM unless I am eating leftovers
disco
February 24th, 2012
10:39 am
lady – the media generally supports and enables battered women. I, personally, feel that battered women are the problem more so than their abusers. in my opinion, they need to stand up for themselves instead of expecting everyone else to stand up for them.
kimmie - the original :)
February 24th, 2012
10:40 am
Lady – Last I heard on the radio, RiRi has been getting real cozy with Rob Kardashian. I really could care less about the whole Chris/RiRi thing really, though. I’m tired of beating that dead horse. Chris can go straight crazy for all I care. He won’t be able to play that “I’m just a young hothead” card forever though.
Celisea
February 24th, 2012
10:40 am
I love breakfast but I don’t so much do because for me, too much food in the morning makes me lazy or feel lazy but if I gotta have breakfast I want:
Cheese Grits, country ham, toast, soft scrambled eggs, coffee
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:41 am
wow disco the counselor side of my does advocate for all abusers (men) too and its just not easy for those folks to stand up to abuse but I get your POV
Celisea
February 24th, 2012
10:42 am
disco – I’m with you this mornng on Chris. IMO he’s a spoiled brat but to stay with a dude that’s abusive is on you. To stay and take it, then make up, then fake it…and repeat….that’s on you.
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:43 am
volunteer at a domestic violence shelter and listen to some stories and you will understand where I am coming from….
Into the Light
February 24th, 2012
10:44 am
@leggs: traditional red-eye gravy is the grease from the ham (like cba said) and coffee. If you add flour, it’s sawmill gravy.
Mmmm, grits with butter, salt, and pepper.
@Cely – that sounds good, but I’ll take my eggs scrambled hard.
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:45 am
Kimmie I am more so with you with the both of them I just feel like a dark cloud (not death but something like that is just with CB) extensive therapy and just more time away from the public eye may suffice but that is just my POV
Celisea
February 24th, 2012
10:45 am
I remember him having a tantrum on GMA, not realizing the camera/mike was on….he’s a little snot. Really (don’t y’all shoot me), Rhianna should have picked up a bat and knocked him to west hell. He would have thought twice about hitting the next woman.
kimmie - the original :)
February 24th, 2012
10:46 am
I heard about the RiRi/Khardashian thing Wednesday on Q100. I think the media is trying to push this “CB/RiRi getting back together” thing. I’m not convinced unless I actually see a pic of them hugged up together. Doing a song is not enough to convince me.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
February 24th, 2012
10:46 am
Leggs 357 magnum is correct, red eye gravy is a more jucier than your average type of gravy. Sort of like aujue flavoring you can sop biscuits up with.
Damn disco hope you’re not hurt too bad, you know what comes next if you haven’t had it done already a tetanus shot.
Celisea
February 24th, 2012
10:46 am
Blackfoote – I cannot eat eggs hard scambled. I don’t want them running either. That makes me gag (literally)…lol
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:47 am
kimmie when does Scandal start?!?
Oh and Rhi Rhi strikes me as she is going to do her regardless if its with CB or whomever…like it or love it….I just don’t want him to get caught in the matrix even deeper behind living for the moment if that makes sense
Leggs
February 24th, 2012
10:47 am
“My friend who is recently divorced carries a Magnum and we joke that if the guy can’t fit in it, he gets nothing!” – so, how is this determined? Does she simply take his word for his size, all do that have to audition for the coveted size (lol).
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:48 am
but they do strike me as they will find their way back to each other off and on
kimmie - the original :)
February 24th, 2012
10:49 am
Lady – I’m not a RiRi fan at all, but I don’t dislike her. But as far as Chris, all the therapy in the world won’t help him, I’m convinced. I really liked his behind, but he’s just a baby-faced thug now to me, sorry.
disco
February 24th, 2012
10:50 am
I’ve always felt that certain types really do equate abuse to love. I think this because I know women that go from one abusive relationship to another – like if their man isn’t busting their head he doesn’t care about them. I know women that outside of their abusive relationship are pretty darned tough. always fighting in the streets but letting some little nothing at home beat them down. I operate on the premise of “first time shame on you, second time shame on me”. you might hit me once (and though it’s been threatened it’s never happened) but by no means am I going to stick around and become battered. nope. battered women have never been on my charity list. another no-no for me. I can’t stand when folks ask me to donate money to support the families of the troops. I’m like the troops have jobs!!! and thereby they have allotments. if the wives of the troops aren’t doing right then shame on them.
Leggs
February 24th, 2012
10:51 am
@disco ~ I’m not a dunker. Never dunked a donut/cookie in milk, never had cornbread and milk. The only thing I can think of dunking is him into me! Other than that, no need for dunking (lololol).
@BF ~ thank you. Looking back at my original post, Magnum 57 didn’t look right.
@kimmie ~ we have a new chef on the grill this morning and I asked him to make my scrambled eggs soft, but not running, and definitely not hard! He said “which way, miss? I said, in the middle of runny and hard (lol). The line cracked up.
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:51 am
Kimmie and with you again but I do like some of Rhi Rhi music and truly never been that fan for CB but he needs some type of intervention bc its like he will be next…..just a bad path……shrugs
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:53 am
disco that is part of their brain make up to make those decisions on top of low self esteem and everything associated with that even going back to their childhood as to what they saw and had happened to them….trust I am not making excuses for the victim or abusers but both continue the cycle for so many reason beyond the black and white assessments
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
February 24th, 2012
10:55 am
Cely I like my eggs between hard and soft. Don’t want to get started on steaks, steak and eggs, toast fresh off the grill. Soon as I’m done with breakfast I have plenty of energy, pretty much can go the whole day before eating again.
Bluzgirl
February 24th, 2012
10:56 am
Leggs…I didn’t really think about how that it would be determined. She said it helps her think big! LOL
Lady~
February 24th, 2012
10:57 am
yall making me hungry! lol brunch on a resort would be lovely! what a hectic week this has been!