How supportive are you?
One of our readers has a relationship problem that I think some of us can relate to. Tara has been seeing a guy for over a year and things are pretty serious. She feels that he is taking the relationship seriously, but she wants to know if the thing that is bothering her about him is a deal breaker. Her guy is not very supportive of her at all, in fact he is critical of her a lot.
I know exactly what she is going through because I have met the type before – some men feel as if they have to “tear you down and build you back up” and mold you into the woman they want you to be. It’s interesting because they disguise it behind good intentions and helpful feedback, when really…they are just being a butthead.
My advice is to speak up now and see if that can be dealt with amicably. I think having someone who supports you is an absolute must. I am all for challenging me and helping me grow, but some people don’t know how to do it with love.
Have you ever dated someone who was overly critical of you?
Do you consider yourself to be supportive when you are in a relationship?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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433 comments Add your comment
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
February 22nd, 2012
2:53 pm
Well dern Cely, I’ll get you home before the moon shows full……..LOL
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
2:53 pm
Leggs – Yes he does
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
2:53 pm
makUVBuv to Cee = Make luv! Damn it
I’m eating grapes and nearly choked!
Lady~
February 22nd, 2012
2:53 pm
y’all be easy! great blog day!
~peace out~
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
2:54 pm
Blackfoote – Boy stop….lol
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
2:54 pm
She’s too lazy to read I showed her the link
Slim!
I ha a collection once but lost it coz my machine was reimaged
Folks trusted me with their physical looks coz it was just a look don’t judge basis
I know u don’t believe
I’m very unjudgemental lol
disco
February 22nd, 2012
2:55 pm
okay – I know we’ve left the prejudices behind us for today but I want to sort of kind of bring them back up. I’ve mentioned to folks that I won’t give a guy from Detroit a chance. the very fact that he’s from Detroit is a deal breaker for me. I realize this is my personal prejudice against Detroit. any of you have any of those types of dating prejudices?
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
2:55 pm
@disco ~ your 2:39 on point. Celisea has good reason to bow out on this bogus meet n greet. Me too (lololol). Bluz, get ghost (lololo).
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
2:56 pm
Mmeello – You know I’m kidding. I think you’re probably the most harmless one on here. You know Queen don’t play that…lol
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
2:57 pm
Leggs – You just hush up now. He owes me dinner…lol I haven’t been pressed to take him up but it’s still out there…ain’t that right Blackfoote.
Bluzgirl
February 22nd, 2012
2:57 pm
@Ex…I don’t mess with married men!
I haven’t been scouting…just observing!
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
February 22nd, 2012
2:58 pm
Y’all I’m out too have a great evening. I’m now walking Lady to her ride.
That Sneiderman gal, why they haven’t indicted her is beyond belief. Hers is yet to come.
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
2:59 pm
Blackfoote – Whether people believe it or not….EVERYBODY gets theirs.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
February 22nd, 2012
2:59 pm
Cely:
Yep!
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:01 pm
I won’t date a man that wear those long shorts as pants (lol).
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
3:02 pm
Blackfoote walking Lady to the car..
ultimate Gentleman!
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:02 pm
Damn BF how many blog women you got in your harem (lol)…and here I is me IS thinking Is special???
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
3:03 pm
@Disco?
what’s the rap with Detroit
what’s the stereotype?
Criminals?
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:04 pm
Just cuz you walk a woman to the car, then throw her in the backseat, doesn’t make you a gentlemen (lol).
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:06 pm
Wait, wait, that doesn’t come across properly. Not saying he’s going throw Lady in the backseat, just meaning because someone walks one to the car doesn’t necessarily mean…..awwww, Fuggedaboutit….
disco
February 22nd, 2012
3:07 pm
exiled – I can’t speak as to the general stereotypes but in my personal experience the dog-types that come out of Detroit are just grimier than any other dog-types I’ve come across. that’s enough for me to leave Detroit alone.
cba
February 22nd, 2012
3:09 pm
Celisea 2:48……sh!t a brick or go blind……that’s why I miss you when you’re not here (LOL)
I just had a flash back from one of my high school football coaches….he’ll be mad at you and he’ll just say,” well sh!t a brick”
Bluzgirl
February 22nd, 2012
3:11 pm
I have a thing about New Orleans men…I’ve dated two of them and one was a heavy alcoholic and the other was psychotic! I’m not too interested in another NOLA man!
Also…I’m going to try to stay away from the musicians! LOL
Purple
February 22nd, 2012
3:13 pm
disco, I won’t date a woman with short hair or one from a single parent home or an only child. Oh yeah I won’t date a woman that used to be a man. Those are pretty much my only dating quirks.
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:13 pm
Heeeeey cba – How goes it? Yep, that’s one my kid’s dad (hey FION), use to say. Old school.
Oh and when mad he’d say a person would much rather run through fire with gasoline drawers than to mess with him. Of course that was all hot air from him…lol
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
3:14 pm
Disco..
I get ur point hopefully one day,I’ll meet a dude from there that u will want to give a chance as a standalone..without having to bear the cross for Detroit,Kwame or any of them.
i'm swiss
February 22nd, 2012
3:16 pm
Wait… Did I read that right? Fion is C’s baby daddy?
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
3:16 pm
Ull not I’ll
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:17 pm
Swiss – Boy, I am rolling over here. I laughed so loud someone closed their door. Hell naw!
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:18 pm
That was a reference to his rant with me from yesterday. He don’t like me. Boo hoo of course
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:19 pm
Swiss – I’m still laughing…. You are a funny man
i'm swiss
February 22nd, 2012
3:20 pm
C — Aw, hell…. and here I was already doing my Maury “I am NOT the father” dance…
cba
February 22nd, 2012
3:21 pm
disco: I have a neighbor from Detroit and I had heard they can go gansta. In ‘05 he was having a bd party for his daughter and some guy tried to man up in his house and my neighbor killed him right on the stairwell. He didn’t serve any time so I guess it was self defense. I keep my distant because I heard he braggs about it.
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:21 pm
I ain’t done a lick of work. Now Imma have to take my laptop home and work cause I’m goofing off. I’ve now got 6 projects of which 3 is due next week.
Dern it, y’all ain’t good for me.
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:22 pm
Sorry to disappoint you Swiss but naaaw, he is NOT the father…lol
I have a friend that loves to go to Detroit. I don’t get it. She don’t even strike me as such but hey you never know. Her brothers run up there.
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:23 pm
You know you read that wrong, swiss (LOLOL).
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
3:23 pm
Like Bluz I just think Nola breeds hard core criminals
wrong yea maybe
Crime went up in metro A after Katrina
I j s
Uall know my light skin stereotype
For me it’s more that that
Its a d!ck deflator
it just goes cold no excitement
Like knock kneed ladies. Have had very pleasurable expetiences in the past
Dark skinned
Tallish
chest with bounce
ample butt
can u say woof woof
Dawg!
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
3:24 pm
than that
i'm swiss
February 22nd, 2012
3:25 pm
“Uall know my light skin stereotype
For me it’s more that that
Its a d!ck deflator
it just goes cold no excitement”
Me.lo — I have that same ailment.
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:26 pm
“Her brothers run up there.” – what does that mean. They run the marathon up there? They run the mob in that state? They run the drug lords (mob)? What does run up there mean? Oh, they gots the key to the city.
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:28 pm
I’m impressed…men that like dark women.
Chocolatte’ as my cousin use to call me
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:29 pm
Leggs – She’s never said but she would always go with them when they took a trip. I suspect drugs.
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:29 pm
Chocollate nothing…you just plain pretty!
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:30 pm
Leggs??? Girl stop. I’m a’ight…average
And what are you talking about? You’re a looker yourself.
i'm swiss
February 22nd, 2012
3:31 pm
“I’m impressed…men that like dark women.”
Well, hello there, C. Name’s swiss. How YOU doin’?
Celisea
February 22nd, 2012
3:31 pm
Swiss – I hope you’re saying it like Joey from Friends…lol
disco
February 22nd, 2012
3:33 pm
celisea – I’ve said before that my family cracks jokes. growing up some of my older cousins used to tease me relentlessly about being too dark. boy the names they called me. it took for me to grow up and realize that one of those cousins in particular is even darker than I am. as a kid it never occurred to me to give it right back to him.
Leggs
February 22nd, 2012
3:34 pm
I was being silly, disco. I figured it mean drugs…runs (being a mule). She was their mule to ward off the scent of police…
Willie Dynamite
February 22nd, 2012
3:34 pm
Afternoon All,
Yall are funny as heyal. I dont even know where to jump in.
I guess I’ll start with the Chocolate/dark women. My kryptonite of course.
Exiled!
February 22nd, 2012
3:36 pm
same ailment
Swiss!
nail it!