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Ex files: Reunite or never go back?

I know this coupled up holiday can sometimes have an effect on you. You see red hearts and romance reminders everywhere you look. You can’t make a trip to the grocery store or even the gas station!

These kind of reminders that you are single can make you feel vulnerable, lonely, and a little “randy”. This is when you may consider checking back in with those exes. Or you may even hear from your ex out of the blue. It’s usually the exes that are no good for us but we never truly get out of our systems. Yeah, that one.

What do you do? Is it ever a good idea to reunite with an ex? Is this the time of year to do it?

Have you ever looked up a former flame to offer a little “solace” from a sad Valentine’s Day?

Do you ever feel that you have unfinished business with someone from your past? Would you reunite or decide to never go back?

Happy Friday!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

232 comments Add your comment

Bob Smith

February 10th, 2012
6:56 am

Lily

February 10th, 2012
7:02 am

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
7:52 am

Good Morning~ Happy Fantastic Friday!

Lady doesn’t play the going back game. This is one area I master well actually.

Foxy

February 10th, 2012
8:19 am

Foxy does not repeat herself!:)

Have a Fab Friday Kids!

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
8:22 am

chuckling @ the V-Word = vulnerable!

roughrider

February 10th, 2012
8:43 am

My dad always told me that you don’t learn ANYTHING the second time a mule kicks you.

Good Day Fan

February 10th, 2012
8:43 am

I don’t have a Valentine this year, but I’m not tempted to call up any of my exes either. It’s a reason why they’re exes.

Pamela

February 10th, 2012
9:06 am

Never…ever….EVER !! If it didn’t work out the first time…..it won’t work out the second….third…..fourth….lol….

disco

February 10th, 2012
9:08 am

good morning. roughrider I like that though I’d say you probably didn’t learn much the first time the mule kicked you if you are within kicking range of the mule the second time. sort of like the first time shame on you, second time shame on me statement.

I generally agree with the stay away from the exes but I’m in a contrary mood today and so I’ll try to find the benefits of a quick hookup with an ex. hmmm. let’s see. you already know them and likely no how to contact them so it’s not like you have to get dolled/duded up and go out into the world of strangers and pick up some random person. you already know whether or not the sex is worth your time. no way of knowing that when you get with a new person and we all know how disappointing bad sex can be. what else, what else. well everyone is quick to point out you are exes for a reason. if that reason isn’t bad sex then a mutually agreed upon no strings attached rendezvous for old times’ sake might be in order. it’s valentine’s day weekend – treat yourself to some “feel good”. now here’s my disclaimer: if you are one of those who tend to get emotionally detached and all caught up, LEAVE THE EX ALONE. if you can roll with it, get yours and bounce, I say roll with it, get yours and bounce.

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:12 am

second time shame on me statement. <<<<<really if you go back and it back fires this applies! I would love to hear from a couple that dissolved and went back and was successful the second time around. I know some exist maybe?!?

Celisea

February 10th, 2012
9:14 am

Good Friday morning!

I’m not going to do the cliche that’s been mentioned a hundred times already this morning…lol

I’m going to say generally and typically for me, that’s a no no. I wills say with a bit of “effort”, there’s probably one ex that can get it with me. He carries kryptonite :)

Otherwise, naaaaah, I’ll pass. I think I’d rather have a quick meeting of stranger than to rekindle (with the others).

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:17 am

I’m going to say generally and typically for me, that’s a no no. I wills say with a bit of “effort”, there’s probably one ex that can get it with me. He carries kryptonite <<<<<<<the truth.com I think we all have one but even with that one it will be new parameters I think…….lol

Celisea

February 10th, 2012
9:18 am

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:19 am

Bob Evans

February 10th, 2012
9:20 am

Reunite with Paula Deen?

Yeah, I’d hit that one more time.

disco

February 10th, 2012
9:22 am

lady – I’ve heard of several couples who remarried the same person. that’s the real get back with an ex right there. a lot of that break up, back together stuff between boyfriend/girlfriend is child’s play compared to that. I have one friend in particular who gets together with her ex-husband when she’s between men. for a long time she and ex-hubs were both single, they both remarried and they both got divorced again. through it all, they continue to hook up. if they were ever to announce that they were getting remarried I’d be like “it’s about daggone time”.

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:26 am

disco I can’t imagine in a million years getting back with my ex-hubby when I am between men. Lawd I told that dude the day he left he could never come back to me ever and I meant that. I am so proud we never played that game.

Kudos to the divorce couples who remarry and last!

disco

February 10th, 2012
9:30 am

lady – in this particular friend’s defense her ex-hubs is fine. I’m not even into white men but he’s got that rugged cowboy thing going on, he’s tall and muscled up. they live in texas too so he’s got the look down. he’s one sexy something or other. they were married young and likely just couldn’t cope with the foolishness back then. my guess is that with time/age they might really be able to work it all out again. I suggest it all the time and she tells me I’m tripping all the time but she’s the one that keeps screwing him. go figure. still – not mad at her because dude is nice.

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:31 am

& disco I can really see it for some bc they have that chemistry and bond that is still present. My faded quickly and I ask too many questions and would want more that the sex. naw that game isn’t for me. lol

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:31 am

meant mine faded

Leggs

February 10th, 2012
9:34 am

What do you do? – Continue what I’ve been doing = Doing Me, carefree, drama free!

Is it ever a good idea to reunite with an ex? – Why, just because it’s V-day, a day for romance and love. NOPE! That’s not romance or love, it’s just knocking the rust of your pipes.

Is this the time of year to do it? NOPE! Feel sorry for those who let a day like V-day knock them on their backs because they’re emotionally vulnerable. It’s a day with significance, sure, but why put yourself out there to be an insignificant piece is someone’s life??

Have you ever looked up a former flame to offer a little “solace” from a sad Valentine’s Day? NOPE! A “sad” V-day is “sad” only because YOU made it sad. Get a grip! Love yourself and solace yourself. Buy yourself flowers, take yourself to dinner, buy yourself a gift if that’s what you’re seeking. To feel you spent V-day with a former flame just so you didn’t spend it alone is a testament to your own weakness.

Good morning.

Celisea

February 10th, 2012
9:40 am

Mmmmmmm………

I’m having egg whites, a slice of french toast and a cup of coffee

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:44 am

I didn’t want breakfast C but I am hungry will be running out in a few to grab subway. I am so just ready to go though….smh lol

ThirdWheelFlunkie

February 10th, 2012
9:45 am

NO NO and NO!! I learning this lesson the hard way… NEVER AGAIN!!!…. Good Morning Yall!

Celisea

February 10th, 2012
9:52 am

Lady, that hit the spot. I don’t usually do the full country breakfast. That’s waaaay too heavy. Something light to fuel the body.

HST

February 10th, 2012
9:55 am

Good Morning All,
Never, unless it was strictly a booty-call. However, most of my break-ups didn’t end badly. Usually, the women realized that I wouldn’t marry no matter how hard they tried. They only had themselves to blame for thinking I didn’t mean what I was saying, I really did get a vasectomy (no way to trick there) and I had no design on commitment other than I enjoy monogamy.

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
9:59 am

never HST?!? you wine and dine and never want to take it to the next level?!? lol correct me if I am wrong sir! ;)

Leggs

February 10th, 2012
10:01 am

O/T ~ how much dang mucus can one nose make!!!!!

disco

February 10th, 2012
10:02 am

leggs – that sounds like a question for bill nie the science guy.

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
10:03 am

much the secretion is healthy to a degree Leggs!

HST

February 10th, 2012
10:03 am

Lady, I always take it to the next level sexually but I will never be married again. The one girl that I’ve dated for 12 years works internationally. She’s so hot and awesome but with that comes the knowledge that I couldn’t be the only one. She’s told me point blank – I’m not marrying material. She’s right but I do enjoy monogamy.

kimmie - the original :)

February 10th, 2012
10:05 am

Morning All!

In the words of Miss Boss, Diana Ross – “I Want Muscles!” Heard that song on Steve Harvey this morning, along with some of her other hits. Had not heard it in a long time, sounded so good! She’s getting a well-deserved lifetime acheivement award at the Grammy’s!

Let me go back & read so I can comment on the topic.

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
10:05 am

Oh ok cool sir! Thanks!

HST

February 10th, 2012
10:07 am

Secretions from the nose depend on the amount of contaminates in the sinus. You will continue to make mucus until the contaminant is absolved. You can get an over the counter remedy that is homeopathic and works wonders…it’s called Sinu-Rinse. Get the bottle not the pot Sinu-Rinse. It works wonders and is great if you ever come in contact with sick people. I use it everytime after I leave the hospital.

Leggs

February 10th, 2012
10:08 am

@Lady ~ yeah, I know. White mucus is better than green mucus.

Ok, ok, ok…I’m done with the mucus (well it’s not done with me, but you know what I mean).

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
10:10 am

Leggs

February 10th, 2012
10:11 am

@kimmie ~ I can kick myself. Went online to purchase a ticket for myself to go see Ms. Ross and closed out because I tried to win them on the radio. Kiss 104.1 was giving them away, but I was never the 14th caller. Was #9 and #13. Now, I won’t be in the audience because I tried to score free tickets. Serve me right.

HST

February 10th, 2012
10:11 am

Leggs, Sinu-Rinse will make that go away with 2-3 treatments at the most. I have to use it also after working in the yard. Even an infection will go away if you haven’t let it go for too long.

Sassy Me...Juicy Fruit ;-)

February 10th, 2012
10:12 am

much the secretion is healthy to a degree Leggs!

True that…also check the color ( I know, TMI right)..if it’s slightly yellow or clear that means your on the mend and getting better.

On topic: I don’ t back track… If we were in a serious relationship that’s met its demise then so be it, there’s no reason to re-vist the scene of the crime. If you’re my ex, you’re that for a reason…

Bluzgirl

February 10th, 2012
10:16 am

I don’t think I even have to say anything on this topic today! LOL

I’m thankful that I have several girlfriends who have offered to be my Valentines this year!!!

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
10:16 am

there’s no reason to re-vist the scene of the crime<<<<<<<< HILARITY!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
10:17 am

Bluzgirl You crossed my mind this morning if it not too much can you email me I want you to help me with something please ma’am msjenkins8@gmail.com

M. (pronouced M dot)

February 10th, 2012
10:17 am

Good day.

You have to totally go silent on the ex’s especially around this time of the year. Just keep it moving.

The real question should be if you are dating multiple people, how do you handle this valentines day weekend/day? I think even if you two have an understanding, somebody in the back of their mind is always expecting something different.

Lady~

February 10th, 2012
10:19 am

The real question should be if you are dating multiple people, how do you handle this valentines day weekend/day? <<<<<M. that will tell a story sooner than later but the writing maybe on the wall too! Wow! this is a funny valentine kind of weekend for many! LOL

Leggs

February 10th, 2012
10:19 am

@HST ~ interesting you say that, cuz my ex brought me Sinu-Rinse yesterday. Yeah, we’re talking about ex’s, but no going back. Go to the store for me, I’m fine with that. But, that’s it.

HST

February 10th, 2012
10:20 am

Do you ladies and men always have relationships that end so badly? I kind of don’t get that…I’m friends with all my exs – even the married ones. Is it because y’all expect marriage to come from dating?

Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB

February 10th, 2012
10:20 am

I hinted at this before, but me and the Mrs had some difficult times over the years. Split, come back, break up to make up stuff which had more to do with personal growth than differences that were impossible overcome, no cheating or nothin of the sort…so my ex is my Mrs. Its possible, wouldn’t change any of the trials we had, the relationship is much better when you allow yourself to experience real troubles, and find it deep somewhere to push on….if you are gonna have any type of significant long term love, marriage, etc….you will need to develop that strength between you and your S/O….in somes cases that means muddling through the tough times to get to forever!

HST

February 10th, 2012
10:21 am

Leggs, he did the right thing for you – have you used it?

Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB

February 10th, 2012
10:21 am

be back, got a meeting

Leggs

February 10th, 2012
10:23 am

@M. ~ I would imagine those dating multiple parties are in a bit of a quandary on what to do and how much a dent in their wallets this day will make.