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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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Lingerie a risky gift?

That so called “romantic holiday” that is less than a week away has some people all in a tizzy. When you are in the “casual dating” stage, things may be a little confusing on which way to go. What do you do when you aren’t exclusive, but definitely more than just friends, and headed toward romance?

One reader wants to know if he should purchase lingerie for a woman he has feelings for and wants to let her know. I don’t think lingerie is a good gift idea for someone you are just dating. It can be a risky option since it sort of screams “I want to see you in it for about 30 seconds” – which may be the point, but is it the right time?

Are their certain gifts that you should definitely steer clear from just to be safe?

Have you ever given or received lingerie or sexy items as a gift from someone you were seeing? How did you/they react?

What is the sexiest thing someone has ever given you?

A guy once gave me a porn video. Seriously, he literally gift wrapped the thing! I’m no prude (by any stretch of the imagination) but that did not win me over.

Here is a tip for you: Never give porn to someone you actually want to impress. You’re welcome.

362 comments Add your comment

Exiled!

February 9th, 2012
1:00 pm

12:52 is 100% true Disco!

That’s why u can never understand two folks’ relationship.
it’s unique to them

It’s funny u say that coz my wife and I share secrets that none in our two families know of

That’s sweet!

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
1:02 pm

That’s why u can never understand two folks’ relationship.
it’s unique to them<<<<<<Love that Ex!

Bluzgirl (AKA Kellibean)

February 9th, 2012
1:03 pm

@Leggs…true…my true friends do know…I guess it’s just going to be hard for a while because people will be asking me where he is when I’m out without him (like they always do). I promised I wouldn’t bash him and I will stick to that. I’m just kind of slowly telling people about it. I’ll be at an event on Sunday that will have a ton of our mutual friends and it will be hard to have to tell everyone separately. Maybe I should just get on the stage and make the announcement! LOL!!!

I could always make an announcement on Facebook, but I don’t want to because I don’t want to deal with the messages, texts, phone calls. I’ll talk to people when I’m ready…

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
1:03 pm

I’m not saying this because I’m single, but V-day is not what it’s cracked up to be. Too commercialized. Sure, nice to get a gift or taken to dinner on that day, but if he hasn’t been showing love to me prior to this special day, pls don’t mask the problems by showing up on that one day!

And, never understood why the price of roses are so inflated and numskulls by those expensive flowers only to be put in the garbage a week or two later. Hell, give me the money in a card and let me buy something that will last.

Celisea

February 9th, 2012
1:05 pm

I feel fat today :(

Celisea

February 9th, 2012
1:05 pm

Okay…that was random

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
1:07 pm

@Bluz ~ childish to announce breakups on FB. Also, you don’t need to tell people separately. Tell one, that person who can’t hold water. It will spread like wild fire.

Willie Dynamite

February 9th, 2012
1:08 pm

Leggs – You are just saying that cause you single. j/k j/k j/k

Cel – whats fat? thick, curvy or oh my dayum?

Exiled!

February 9th, 2012
1:11 pm

U can choose Not to focus on those tons of friends and focus on U!
U U U U is of paramount importance than those so called friends who proly speak behind ur back anyway

Toughen up!

Exiled!

February 9th, 2012
1:12 pm

Feel fat? Cel?

Where? :lol:

Bluzgirl (AKA Kellibean)

February 9th, 2012
1:14 pm

I’m getting tougher every day…I think I’ll be even tougher after he is out of the house and the healing process can really, truly begin!

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
1:14 pm

@Celisea ~ there’s nothing about you fat!!!

@WillieD ~ point is if you’re not showing me love and attention already, don’t do it on Vday.

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
1:15 pm

he has 30 days by law to leave is that bout up or is he leaving straight up quickly?!?

SlimNu

February 9th, 2012
1:18 pm

In this case, C may mean “Bloated”…it be’s like that some times

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
1:22 pm

@Bluz ~ curious, how long have the two of you been living together?

Bluzgirl (AKA Kellibean)

February 9th, 2012
1:23 pm

He’s leaving this weekend…we both know that 30 days wouldn’t be a good idea. He has places to go. I don’t really know if the law would hold up if he did try to challenge it because there is no lease, no rent, no legal address change for him. He wouldn’t challenge it anyways. There is no reason to prolong it. If he really needed a few more days or another week, we could probably work it out.

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
1:24 pm

cool beans chica! ;)

Bluzgirl (AKA Kellibean)

February 9th, 2012
1:24 pm

@Leggs…about 2 months shy of being two years.

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
1:28 pm

“If he really needed a few more days or another week, we could probably work it out.” – This is where you would make a big mistake. You’re not really ready to let go!!!!

Bluzgirl (AKA Kellibean)

February 9th, 2012
1:30 pm

@Leggs…honestly, I don’t want to let go, but I have to let go. I don’t think he would even ask for a few more days or a week out of respect for me. If he did stay longer, I would be afraid that I would cave and I just can’t.

Purple

February 9th, 2012
1:32 pm

Bluz, is all hope lost? No reconciliation?

Purple

February 9th, 2012
1:33 pm

Bluz, I don’t need to know the details but sometimes bad things happen but that doesn’t mean you can’t reconcile. Somethings that the world won’t forgive you may be able to. You have to look out for your heart.

Exiled!

February 9th, 2012
1:36 pm

Bluz?

U gon live with a dude again next time?

u know the next relationship always seems the ‘right’ one.

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
1:47 pm

what’s y’all thoughts on Roland Martin and CNN?!?

Exiled!

February 9th, 2012
1:56 pm

Lady?

It’s much ago bout nothing really,to me.

He didn’t say none bout Gays..
I saw the commercial and wasn’t feeling it myself
but not for any reason than the fact that I didn’t

What I see tho is we All now castrated coz Gay folks have money and their lobby group is powerful and they control a whole slew of industries

They cough everybody sneezes!

Exiled!

February 9th, 2012
1:57 pm

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
1:58 pm

I concur sir! RM was so refrained this morning on TJMS and Tom wouldn’t touch it. so ironic though bc they go in on everybody! They even let Jawn Murray go for the cracks on women with natural hair

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:01 pm

i said MSNBC will hire him Mike Steele and Rev Al holdin it down 0_o lol

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:03 pm

oh its official too will and jada splits says they are better as exes

Robert

February 9th, 2012
2:08 pm

“Never give porn to someone you actually want to impress. ”

I once gave a woman a VHS tape of me taking a shower for a Valentine’s gift. She told me she would watch that video all the time. It made her feel connected to me when I was not with her. Ladies and gentlemen, make your own “porn” video using your PC. I bet you will have a great time.

Purple

February 9th, 2012
2:08 pm

So you can say anything about whites, blacks, latinos etc but you get censored when you talk about gays? Really?

Bluzgirl (AKA Kellibean)

February 9th, 2012
2:12 pm

@Purple…we’ve had some major problems over the past 6 months. I know he loves me and cares about me as much as he can love anyone, but it’s just not enough. He’s carried around a lot of bitterness and has a guarded heart. If he were able to let that go, then I think we could work well together. I just can’t wait around any longer for him to do this. I thought he was the one, but I’m not his number one. Therefore, I can’t be with him anymore. He didn’t do anything so bad to me, which in a way, I wish he did so it would be easier. He isn’t a bad guy…just not the one for me anymore. If he gets out there on his own and wakes up, I’m not totally closed to it, but I don’t see that happening at all. We have just gotten unhealthy together and it started turning me into a person I didn’t want to be…angry, resentful, jealous, b*tchy.

@Ex…I won’t live with another man for a really long time. He and I moved in together really quickly. He is the first man I ever lived with. I’m not going to do it again until there is a full on commitment!!!

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:13 pm

purple someone just asked that same question on facebook! go figure~! guess money talks huh

Fion

February 9th, 2012
2:14 pm

@Purp
Funny thing is, he (Roland) never said the words guy or homosexual.

Celisea

February 9th, 2012
2:17 pm

Y’all funny….

WillieD/Exiled – Feeling fat and fat ARE NOT THE SAME. As SlimNu reference, bloated…nope not fat…lol

Leggs – @Celisea ~ there’s nothing about you fat!!!

Thanks Lady..you see I put that in bold and trust you since we’ve met. :)

Purple

February 9th, 2012
2:17 pm

Bluz, I think it can be repaired but I am on the outside looking in.

Lady and Fion, I really don’t understand why that group is so sensitive…and it’s like they try and push their way of life on everyone and we have to accept them. I can’t stand that crap.

Celisea

February 9th, 2012
2:19 pm

Really – Aunt Flow is about upon me..that’s all. I know TMI

Sorry for the slow response. I was actually running down to grab something and ran into a friend so we copped a squat and chatted awhile.

LOLOL…y’all are nuts

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
2:19 pm

He can’t even say the word “guy?” J/K

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:19 pm

I know it irks you Purple its power and control! smh!

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:20 pm

Leggs my mama asked was Don Lemon offended?!? #dead LOL

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:21 pm

when he came out I was like whocares.com Don we all knew that!

Bluzgirl (AKA Kellibean)

February 9th, 2012
2:23 pm

Purple…it may be able to be repaired, but not for a while. We both have a lot of work to do on ourselves before we can be together. Funny thing…we actually were kind of together about 10 years ago for a little while. Never actually became a couple for a lot of reasons. I hated him then because he broke my heart. He has grown a lot since then and I thought he was brought back into my life for a reason…that we must be meant to be together. He has more growing to do before he can be in a healthy, happy relationship. He has to give up some selfishness. If it’s meant to be, we will be together again in the future. I just can’t hold onto that hope. I have to be able to move forward with my life and just hope and pray that he does the things he needs to do to have a good relationship with someone. I want us both to be happy and if it’s not together, then so be it.

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:25 pm

Wow Bluzgirl and the plot thickens! This too shall pass eventually!

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
2:25 pm

@Celisea ~ too funny! If anything is fat on you it’s all that hair you have (LOLOL).

Don’t mean to rub salt in the wound, but I is happy Aunt Flow doesn’t visit me anymore IS!!!

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:27 pm

i wanna meet C! :9 soon I guess ms C! ;)

Celisea

February 9th, 2012
2:27 pm

Awwww Leggs, You are so sweet to say so. Honestly, I NEVER see myself like that. But I can definitely take compliments.

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:27 pm

Lady~

February 9th, 2012
2:28 pm

oh I meant to say Go Duke! lol now they trying to put that baby in the NBA (doc rivers son) hope hope he finish school I know I am in the minority though….lol same with Cam Newton lol

Leggs

February 9th, 2012
2:31 pm

WOW, this is your 2nd time around with him now thinking if it’s meant to be and he comes around, the 3rd time will work. Ummm, I wish you luck.

SlimNu

February 9th, 2012
2:32 pm

Celisea & Leggs – It’s sure to be a Bloody Valentine this year for me too :cry: Leggs, pass me another snuggie and some hot tea please