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Single files: Love living alone?

I read a recent NY Times article that said single people are relishing living alone..a lot:

“More people live alone now than at any other time in history. In prosperous American cities — Atlanta, Denver, Seattle, San Francisco and Minneapolis — 40 percent or more of all households contain a single occupant”

Count me in that “living alone and probably loving it waaaay too much” number because I have literally spent an entire weekend alone on my couch before – and loved it.

Just as the article states, single people living alone have a pretty active social life. We come home and relish our space as well as the peace and quiet. Perhaps this in some way becomes yet another barrier to any of us actually settling down?

Does the thought of sharing your “castle” make you want to prolong your single life? Do we get too comfy in our homes to give it up?

If you live alone, what is the best part of it? What is the worst?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

222 comments Add your comment

Lily

February 7th, 2012
7:00 am

I enjoy my living situation but I don’t believe it has any bearing on crossing over into couplesville. I live alone because I don’t live with anyone and I don’t live with anyone because I live alone. There are always pros and cons. The greatest is peace and quiet. The worst would be sex not as often as I’d like. Life is good.

CoolShadow

February 7th, 2012
7:41 am

Living in solitude definitely has its good and bad points, you just have to assess what’s important as it relates to the pros and cons. For the pros, maintaining extreme privacy, not having to make special arrangements to have company and the need to check to see if “the coast is clear” sometimes makes living alone worth the price. On the con side, you’re footing the entire bill for your housing, thus it could possibly limit where you could live that’s within your means. Also, making mistakes on roommates can cost you both emotionally and financially.

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
8:15 am

Morning!!!!

I feel the older we get in our single state the more comfy and somewhat set in our ways we become whether we stay alone or with family or a roommate………..But yeah staying alone have many perks that outweigh staying with anyone IMHO………

Foxy

February 7th, 2012
8:40 am

Does the thought of sharing your “castle” make you want to prolong your single life? Do we get too comfy in our homes to give it up?

Foxy thinks you just need a large enough Castle!

GM Kids! :)

Audra

February 7th, 2012
8:44 am

It gets lonely sometimes, especially coming home from work to an empty house. But on the other hand, the complete freedom to do what I want when I want – eat ice cream for dinner, whatever, is nice!! Pets help a lot too, with the loneliness.

Candy

February 7th, 2012
9:08 am

What’s wrong with living alone? I can bet many cohabitating wish they could swap places.

Candid Dude

February 7th, 2012
9:10 am

Living as a single guy, I am very thankful to have the luxury of NOT having to go into the bathroom each morning right after my lady has taken an immense, foul, odiferous, nauseating toxic # 2.

For me, that perk of “fresh, breathable air” alone is reason enough to be thankful to live alone.

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
9:21 am

Lily – I couldn’t have said it better myself :)

Love the name Lily….wish I could have had an opportunity to give that name to an offspring. Guess not huh

Morning folks!

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
9:21 am

is it 5pm somewhere?!? I would like a grey goose on the rocks with lime please! ;)

disco

February 7th, 2012
9:24 am

good morning. well I’ll be. a topic I can totally relate to. I’ve been home alone since the emancipation (son’s h.s. graduation) in 2007. prior to that I’d only lived with my son and prior to that I’d only lived at home with parents/siblings. I’ve never done the shack up thing and never had a roommate. I LIKE/LOVE/ADORE living alone and to me the pros far outnumber the cons. I know people who have never ever lived alone and I actually wonder how they would cope with it but it suits me fine.

having said that I’ll list my cons. I really won’t list occasional loneliness since everyone generally agrees that alone and lonely aren’t the same. do I get lonely sometimes? sure but I can get up, get out and do something so that’s not as big a deal as folks might think. sometimes I hate sleeping in my bed alone and I usually resolve that by sleeping on the couch. in the bed you are keenly aware of all the extra space. sleeping on the couch (or even in the recliner) seems to remedy that problem for me. I do hate when something needs repairs/maintenance. guess it would be cool not to have to be the one that had to tend to everything. I’m sure I’ll think of more cons later.

here’s some pros: knowing that whatever you had good in the fridge will still be there when you get home. I absolutely HATED having my mouth set on something to discover the offspring had already ate it. knowing that you can clean up one good time and it stays that way. knowing that things will always be where you put them. being in complete control of the tv, radio, thermostat, everything. all the extra closet/storage space. not having to do laundry nearly as much as my friends with families.

"ISO" Joe

February 7th, 2012
9:25 am

Living alone is the bomb!!!! It gives me complete control and there is nothing better than that!!! When I want to not be alone I make that happen and when I don’t want to be bothered, I simple unplug, sign off or not answer……

SlimNu

February 7th, 2012
9:32 am

Blogmonster can kiss my arse

Leggs

February 7th, 2012
9:33 am

Enter your comments here

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
9:34 am

Reading disco’s post made me think about my past.

I cohabitated for about 7 years and really it’s gotta be a frigid day in hades before I would want that again….just shacking. An occasional sleepover (in an LTR)? Maybe. Since having my kid though, I’ve NEVER had a dude to spend the night over nor I. Ever…and she’s almost 17. I’ve taken my kid to my mom’s and pick her up like super super late…say 2 or 3 ish but never all night….unless traveling. The couple of dudes I’ve been in LTR though since having her have been head and shoulder and classy, totally understanding with no pressures. Can say I’ve not rendevoused though while she’s gone away with say my sister or spending time with my mommie…her granny? Absolutely. There are ways and workarounds…lol

Anyway, I too grew up with a house full of folks and unless I’m broaching marriage or get into a truly solid and real and long term, I don’t want to live with anyone. The “friend” or hang out dude don’t qualify for me spending the night nor cohabitating. :)

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
9:35 am

shoulderS not shoulder

Leggs

February 7th, 2012
9:40 am

Anyway…

Good morning. I’m home with a miserable cold and ear infection.

Living alone has its perks, with privacy and freedom to come and go as you please top of the list. No doubt with living alone you will get lonely sometimes, but that can be rectified. You really find out about yourself when you live by yourself. Being alone and being lonely are not twins!

Case in point, living alone, no one to help take care of you when you’re under the weather.

@Candid Dude ~ a woman feels the same way about walking in the bathroom and smelling your crap too (lol).

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
9:42 am

Off topic: Monica Kauffman is retiring in July

Candid Dude

February 7th, 2012
9:47 am

Knowing what a dude doing in the bathroom is disgusting enough. (Yes, we men ARE indeed pigs in there.)

I do NOT need to visualize (or inhale) the fact that my delicate blossom of ladyhood is doing something equally gross.

Once you associate “THAT aroma” with you lady, no perfume she ever wears again can erase that from your olfactory memory.

Candid Dude

February 7th, 2012
9:50 am

Also,

Walking around the house & watching Braves baseball IN THE BUFF without someone telling me to “Put some clothes on!” rocks.

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
9:50 am

humans defecate Dude sheesh!

Loved the Single Life

February 7th, 2012
9:51 am

After living alone for many years and then marriage later in life I feel as though I can comment on this subject as an “expert witness”. As much as I love my wife there is no equal to living alone. As stated by a previous poster, items stay where placed and where they are placed is perfectly fine, one good cleaning will last a month or two, you always know what you have to eat/drink, you have guests over when you want them, tv on all night is fine, you leave a room the lights get turned off, Ramen noodles for supper is great, you can sleep anyplace in the house (the sofa, recliner, bed, porch swing) and no one cares, you can come and go as you please without having to keep someone informed, eating supper/dinner at 10:00 pm is fine, even burgers on the grill….etc to many things to list. Cons?, can’t think of any, especially if one is perfectly content living alone.

kimmie - the original :)

February 7th, 2012
9:57 am

Morning Gang!

When I dating now hubs and it got serious, I was a little worried that I had lived alone for so long and enjoyed it. I was afraid adapting would be difficult. I had roommates in college, but my mom warned me to not move out from home until I could afford a place on my own. That was some of the best advice ever. There were all kinds of issues to pop up with roommates that, while I tolerated in college, would not tolerate as an adult post-college. Never shacked with a dude either.

I have adjusted nicely to living with husband & kids, but it is rough at times because I’m a neat freak and I eat more healthy. I am slowly reeling them in to my way of life! :cool:

M. (pronouced M dot)

February 7th, 2012
9:58 am

Good day…

“If you live alone, what is the best part of it? What is the worst?”

I think the best part is being able to control your living environment, temperature, everything is where you left it etc. I think the worst is the silence and quietness but at least its peaceful! I think the single living crowd takes this for granted because its hard adjusting to being around others suddenly!

disco

February 7th, 2012
9:58 am

funny. speaking of bathroom behavior and living alone. not too long ago I babysat a 4 year old overnight. his mom picked him up the next morning. I thought nothing of it. how come several days later I went in the bathroom and that little joker neglected to flush his number two. I had to laugh but it reminded me that I need to check behind folks. generally when I am expecting visitors I touch up the guest baths but that would have been very embarrassing had someone else found it.

Sassy Me...Juicy Fruit ;-)

February 7th, 2012
10:02 am

Mornting All :mrgreen:

I live alone and I loooove it. The freedom to do what I want..when or how I want to is the isht and that’s what has me addicted to living alone…that plus that fact that I refuse to EVER shack up with a man….EVER. I don’t mind when my S.O. comes over for the night or vice versa but at some point I’m ready to have my space I revel in it. There have been weekends that found me lounging around the house and totally content with doin just that. There is a difference between being alone and being lonely.

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
10:04 am

I see we have a lot of “I live alone and love it” :)

yola

February 7th, 2012
10:06 am

Best thing about living alone? I have solitude when I want it, and company over when I don’t. My dog never complains about anything, as long as she is fed and walked. Music fills in the quiet when it is too quiet. It’s sometimes a bit freaky at night, but a buglar alarm fixed that. Speaking of, having the alarm always on when I’m not there is great comfort, as I know I’m not going to walk in on somebody in the process of robbing me. Had that happen before, and it wasn’t cool. At all.

Realistic

February 7th, 2012
10:08 am

I decided a long time ago that I needed a flight attendant or a busy traveling business woman to have a relationship because I like my alone time and space too much. Then I half-joked that the ideal marriage would involve us buying a duplex so we’d each have our own place. I was a bit surprised to find out that most of my girl-friends actually think it’s a brilliant idea. I think we’re all in need of our own space and together time…when we want it. We want it all, not to be stuck with no place to go. Finding “the right person” doesn’t mean you can live together necessarily. Just like “love” isn’t all you need.

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
10:13 am

chuckle realistic! good points!

Leggs

February 7th, 2012
10:14 am

@Celisea ~ I definitely feel your post. I have never wanted to sneak a man in after my child feel asleep and make sure he was gone before she woke up. Not the type of relationship I wanted to cultivate. So, naturally, I never had a sleepover either. Not the image I wanted to draw for my daughter. No revolving door over here.

@Candid ~ only thing you need to remember is woman are human beings and we all have to go and we all leave an aroma behind. Better out than in…

Where’s Jake Sweet Peada? I need him to bring me some chicken soup and orange pineapple juice.

kimmie - the original :)

February 7th, 2012
10:14 am

I think everyone just needs time to themselves and/or their own space, even if it’s just a room they can go in from time to time to tune everyone and everything out.

disco

February 7th, 2012
10:16 am

another alone plus – I’m sure someone already mentioned walking around naked. won’t say I did that (won’t say I haven’t either – lol) but just this morning I decided at the last minute to do a wash and go hairstyle. I simply came out of the shirt and washed my hair at the sink in my bra. couldn’t have done that with the offspring or some randy man hanging around.

realistic – I, too, have joked about the separate living arrangements being ideal. at the very least we can have separate bedrooms/bathrooms. we can share when we are in the mood and have separate space when we aren’t. I’ve never been the type to be pressed to have folks all up under me.

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
10:17 am

I think too how times have changed and evolved and marriage has slipped as far as to how it places as it relates to one’s scratchoff list. People are going for the gusto and doing what works best for them. There was a time when society dictated and said something was wrong with you if you weren’t married by a certain time. Now it seems people are relishing in comfort and enjoying life and taking in the scenery…

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
10:20 am

C the WSJ magazine had a great topic on how folks are doing what works for them being married and living unconventional………yep times have changed

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
10:22 am

Leggs – Your 10:14 is EXACTLY where I’ve been, where I am and what I hold to…in raising not only a kid but a daughter. While there may have been ups and downs during my two LTRs in her life span, I can’t say I have anything negative as to how both men compromised and placed no pressue. Even to those two men, she’s had dinner (the 3 of us) maybe twice and only saw the other one once. Very very particular in what she’s been exposed to.

Why do people get all up in arms at the odor of waste? Is that not what should happen? Is that not what the restroom is for? I’m only irked if I go in there and you butt needs washing…sorry but seriously. Bowel movements are as natural as breathing and if you aren’t having them then that ain’t natural…lol I just have a problem with the women that funk it up in here with stuff that’s gone wrong.

Sorry about that y’all….that was borderline crass. :(

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
10:24 am

C like Outkast sangs Some people think they ‘ish smell like roses! #truestory

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
10:25 am

or don’t stank maybe………………lol

Curious George

February 7th, 2012
10:27 am

How many Ladies out there (not just women, but refined, sophsicated LADIES) who live alone make it a habit to walk around the house Au Natural for extended periods of time & thoroughly enjoy it?

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
10:28 am

Lady – For certain.

Leggs

February 7th, 2012
10:31 am

All I can say, Celisea is EXACTLY.

I for one have never been bothered by farts, #2 or other bodily functions. It’s natural. Just don’t sit around me and let one rip for the heck of it. You still have to use tact. Leave the couch and walk into the bathroom if you can reach it in time, if not, gas out where you are and stand there for a little bit and let it air out so you don’t have it travel with you back to the couch.

disco

February 7th, 2012
10:35 am

leggs – you crazy. once when my mom and brother were visiting we were shopping. when we returned to the car my brother just stood there. I’m like dude – come on. he then advised us that he was letting one rip and needed time to shake it out of his pants leg before he got in the car. just off I tell you but I appreciated it because I would have been livid trapped in a car with it.

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
10:37 am

Absolutely Leggs. I don’t want no dude passing gas all stupidly around me either. I was just responding about the dude that wants a woman to keep it in so he can see her in a womanly/lady/prissy view….lol

Leggs

February 7th, 2012
10:40 am

@Curious ~ I’m not one for walking around nekkid, but I have for a short period of time at times. I love walking around in tank tops and boy shorts. That’s nekkid enuf for me.

@disco ~ :lol: how considerate. I have stood outside the car waiting to air out before getting in the car. My child sits there and laughs knowing the real deal.

Lady~

February 7th, 2012
10:42 am

yall are a mess lol

Leggs

February 7th, 2012
10:46 am

I knew you were responding to dude who didn’t want to acknowledge his woman does it. I was piggybacking on your post, Celisea.

Yeah, let him continue to see her keep it in being all “womanly/prissy,” then watch her facial contortions and belly aches. How sweet that will now look.

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
10:47 am

I pretty much put something on. My kid is there. At night though it’s skimpy…mainly because I can’t sleep with all that stuff on. When I’m there alone though it’s tshirt/tanks and underwear. Usually if I’m just getting home, I come in dis-robing, my kid wants to come in my room and talk…usually it’s “ummm you wanna wait until I’m done?” Or sometimes she’ll step in my room and I’m sitting on the bed in underwear or nekkid. It’s funny to see her expression when she walks up on it…lol Oooor if I’m standing in front of my drawers looking for something and my back is turned to the door and I only have on skimply boy shorts. LOVE IT! She say’s “well suh, ain’t this something to see”…my mama says that if something shocks her….that’s an old school saying but hi la ri ous the first time I heard her say it.

SlimNu

February 7th, 2012
10:49 am

My posts will NOT post…i give up! :roll:

Leggs

February 7th, 2012
10:52 am

@Celisea ~ my child likes to fly through the air yelling “I’m free, I’m free” every time she gets out the shower. I can be downstairs and she will come down free as bird. Now, if I did it she would turn her head in disgust saying “how rude!” Yeah, I’ve done it once, on purpose, just to rile her up.

Candid Dude

February 7th, 2012
10:56 am

I am sorry if I offended anyone.

I was just trying to be as “Candid” and honest as I know how in responding to the query about why I enjoy living alone some much and what first comes to mind about that independence.

The candor & freedom of expression on this blog, even if we disagree, is why I enjoy this blog so much.

Celisea

February 7th, 2012
10:57 am

That’s funny Leggs because my kid is super private…if I walk in her room and she’s dressing or just done taking a bath she has a caniption.