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Change your dating strategy?

If you have not been successful in your dating this year, maybe it is time to change your strategy. There is no reason to keep doing the same things and going to the same places, if they don’t produce the results you want.

So what can you do differently to get different results? It is so easy to get stuck in a rut but exploring a new thing can be exciting and fun. Try a different part of town to mingle in. Pick up a new organization to volunteer with – you can contribute time while expanding your circle of associates. That’s win – win.

A lot of relationships begin after two people were “referred” to one another through mutual friends. I got a Facebook message from a friend in another city inquiring about single men that I know. Some people may not know you are available and open to meeting someone new. Why not casually mention that you are open to meeting new people to your close friends!

When you finally land a potential match, I think it is helpful to remember your past mistakes and do what you can to avoid the same pitfalls: Hooking up too soon. Talking too much about the exes. Spending too much money to impress. ..I could go on!

Do you think you should change your strategy? Have you thought about what you want to do differently to improve your dating successes?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

301 comments Add your comment

SlimNu

December 19th, 2011
2:58 pm

When they told me I had won, I was like “ok.”

DM – You’re just like someone else I know. Are you that way as well when opening a gift given to you?…sort of like, Thanks…no bells & whistles?

Leggs

December 19th, 2011
2:58 pm

win something….

I don’t squeal, but I’m always tickled.

disco

December 19th, 2011
2:59 pm

kimmie – yesterday my best friend’s wedding was on and I remember thinking that Cameron diaz got on my nerves in the church when she got all excited when she thought Julia Roberts was engaged. I was thinking bubbly chicks like that irk the heck out of me. it’s not that real.

cba

December 19th, 2011
3:00 pm

The only way I will believe the numbers are totally random is if they were all put in a big brown paper sack. LOL Then you have C Blackmon reach in and pull them out.
With all the technology they have in place, they can choose the convient store at the corner of hog head road and chicken liver blvd, in Jesup GA and not the Shell station on Scenic Hwy ( the one I use) :lol:

SexyCool

December 19th, 2011
3:00 pm

I get excited cause the sun came up. I feel like I just won a new day, another opportunity. (lol)

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:02 pm

While I may not jump …I might just shout out a “Hot D@@M or two or three….oh and for those who were at the friday chat..I wound up giving Wild Irish Rose($1.40) as my gag gift of cheap booze..it brought back memories..apparently Boone Farms was the cheap booze for the uppity people.

Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB

December 19th, 2011
3:03 pm

Leggs, how much do you need to put on a number to win 10G’s

disco

December 19th, 2011
3:04 pm

kym – not that you found some wild irish rose. I don’t think that came up. I do remember that my father used to drink tiger rose and that it came in a big gallon sized green glass jar.

Into the Light

December 19th, 2011
3:05 pm

Afternoon, all!

Ahhh, the lottery. I play Mega Millions and PowerBall every week, and have played the same numbers since the lottery started in GA. Haven’t won big yet, but…. (fingers crossed)

Somebody please tell me why we can’t just coast into the new year….they have poor ITL working HARD today! :lol:

Leggs

December 19th, 2011
3:05 pm

@Jake ~ $2.00 straight! That’s all.

Leggs

December 19th, 2011
3:05 pm

That’s why hitting straight is difficult.

I’m in agreement with you, cba!

kimmie

December 19th, 2011
3:06 pm

disco – Now let me clarify – I’m not what you would call the “bubbly, goofy, giggly, blond” type. I just like to clown and act goofy at times. Winning something gives me that opportunity to do so in public! LOL!!

My kids love it when I’m in the kitchen and I will just break out with a goofy dance or song. They can’t help but crack up, since I really can’t dance!!

Into the Light

December 19th, 2011
3:06 pm

apparently Boone Farms was the cheap booze for the uppity people.

Mmmm-hmmmm. I resemble that remark. LOL

SexyCool

December 19th, 2011
3:06 pm

DreamsMaterialize

December 19th, 2011
3:09 pm

this is true, but I like the stats I see around me and not those on paper. My neighbor played 1122 for 6 months and won $10,000.
Leggs For every person who won in six months, there are a million who played and never won at all. My great great grandmother lived to be 98, and she played every week until she died. Never won more than $500 dollars. Most people’s situations are like that. But if your luck has been different, then keep doing what you do. Someone has to win, why not you. If you play, your odds of winning might be low. If you don’t play, your odds of winning are ZERO.

I would do enough jumping and screaming for the both of us!LOL!!! I wouldn’t be embarassed. Everyone expresses joy in a different way. If you want to do cartwheels and break out in the Running Man, I’m good with that. lol

no jumping up and down and high pitched squeals for me.
disco yeah that’s me. just gimme my money. lol

Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB

December 19th, 2011
3:10 pm

Neighbor prolly broke even….6th months worth of playing multiple numbers, midday and night…the rate of return just isnt high enough.

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:12 pm

@disco..I couldn’t remember what all was mention..but MD20/20 was 2.99 and cisco..was around the same price..I wanted to get some hard times booze and Wild Irish fit the bill. It was on the bottom shelf in the fridge..according to the cashier that is how the folks like it..served cold..I told my buddies..sip that slow..got to make it last…hard times booze.

disco

December 19th, 2011
3:13 pm

I don’t ever remember being overly excitable (except for angry outbursts – now in that regard I get very excited). I’m going to have to call my mother and ask if I got excited when I was really little. I doubt it though since I was such a serious child. I’ve annoyed a boyfriend or two by not showing enough enthusiasm for a gift or surprise. I’m like I said thanks what else do you want.

Leggs

December 19th, 2011
3:14 pm

@DreamsM ~ of course…of course. When I’m playing my number I always talk to people and most have the same story…always one number off. Everyone talks about the one up, one down. When I don’t remember to do that, the number falls that way. Playing one up, one down all the time is too expensive.

BUT, I’m going to beat the odds and when one of these days. Hopefully before I have to walk around with a cane. Even then, I’m alive so I can enjoy it even if I give some of it away. That’s joyful to me as well.

Into the Light

December 19th, 2011
3:15 pm

Leggs, I will happily share your winnings. I would NEVER want to steal your joy. :lol:

disco

December 19th, 2011
3:16 pm

kym – did y’all crack that bottle open and have at it? if someone gifted me some wild irish rose I’d pull out a deck of cards and we’d be playing black or red / high or low.

Leggs

December 19th, 2011
3:16 pm

Why do I keep typing when for win?????

kimmie

December 19th, 2011
3:17 pm

Leggs – It may sound like a cliche’, but I do find great joy in giving. When I am able to give something to someone I care about that they really want or need, I am very happy.

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:18 pm

@disco..naw we were in a bar..we had a gift trade of booze..but someone did gets some maker’s mark and a few bottles of tequila were gifted..it’s lucky we didn’t kicked out all the booze at our table.

kimmie

December 19th, 2011
3:19 pm

Life is serious enough. I like to SHOUT every now and then!

Leggs

December 19th, 2011
3:19 pm

Yes indeed, kimmie. Yes indeed.

Ok, have to go to likka store and get my likka and play my number.

@disco ~ I’m going to put $2 on 729 straight…yes ma’am!

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:20 pm

@Leggs..speak those things as if they are so..say..”When I hit the big money..

Into the Light

December 19th, 2011
3:20 pm

All joking aside, I co-sign Kimmie’s 3:17. I do love the feeling of knowing you brought joy to someone.

Into the Light

December 19th, 2011
3:21 pm

Kym: I started The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo today. :)

i'm swiss™

December 19th, 2011
3:21 pm

DreamsMaterialize

December 19th, 2011
3:22 pm

Are you that way as well when opening a gift given to you?
slim I used to be a long time ago, but I changed because I realized the perception that people would have. I don’t want anyone to feel that I’m not thankful or appreciative. Still not doing cartwheels though (hey kimmie). ;-)

I’m going to have to call my mother and ask if I got excited when I was really little.
disco I don’t even have to call my moms for this one because I remember. Whenever I would get into trouble, my moms would let me know I was about to get a whooping or punishment, or both. I would just be like “ok.” This used to infuriate her, and she would always say, “you don’t even care do you?” Thing is, I did care, I just didn’t express it by crying or begging or getting animated.

SexyCool

December 19th, 2011
3:22 pm

I’m going to raid the piggy bank on my desk and go buy a Fantasy Five and a Georgia Five before I leave the airport. (lol)

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:23 pm

Random Thought…I do believe that if I had made the “really wrong turns in my life” I would be some female version of Stringer Bell.

kimmie

December 19th, 2011
3:27 pm

Hey Dreams! :lol:

But you know, while I get excited when I win something, I’m not fake with it either. It’s a fine balance. I’m very warm and appreciative when someone gives me anything. But everything does not warrant a scream!

i'm swiss™

December 19th, 2011
3:27 pm

In all seriousness, though… If I ever did win the lottery, Mrs. Swiss & I would disappear, never to be heard from again, at least not in our current circles. :lol:

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:28 pm

@ITL..it starts slow but picks up as you go along..I am excited to see if the movie keeps to the book..I am on like hour 10 of the audiobook..I am listen now..

disco

December 19th, 2011
3:28 pm

dreams – as far back as I can remember I’ve been relatively non-chalant. still, I’m wondering if perhaps I was excitable in my early years. say before my brother was born (when I was around 3) and robbed me of my only-child-ness. maybe I started off excited and then they traumatized me with such a life shattering event that I never recovered my ability to express excitement. yeah. that sounds right. I’m going to call my mother and start something.

SlimNu

December 19th, 2011
3:30 pm

DM – Thats how my beau is…I tell him all the time he’d be a great poker player because you just never know what that joker is thinking or feeling if he doesn’t verbalize it.

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:30 pm

@Disco..you are blaming you lack of excitement on your brother and your mama? LOL..you better be glad shoes don’t travel via phone..she gonna get you.

SexyCool

December 19th, 2011
3:31 pm

On second thought, I’m going to buy a Win For Life ticket instead. I just recalled dreaming that I won that one night recently.

Have you even done that? Had something come up and it reminded you of a dream?

Into the Light

December 19th, 2011
3:31 pm

@Kym: I saw the trailer yesterday, and decided I better get busy reading. I have a personal rule that I won’t see a movie until after I’ve read the book. Started way back when I used to read a lot of Stephen King and the movies, although good, always fell a little short of the books.

kimmie

December 19th, 2011
3:33 pm

Hubs is not excitable like me. He is very even-keeled and calm. But he manages to be that way and not hurt feelings or come off unappreciative.

disco

December 19th, 2011
3:34 pm

kym – it’s an inside joke that I was supposed to be an only child but my parents didn’t get the memo. my mother knows I’m off and naturally she won’t pay me a lick of attention. naturally I’ll say that’s because of the other siblings as well. (my mother swears that my brothers and I are all jealous of one another and compete for her affections. mostly it’s jokes but I think it makes her feel good).

kimmie

December 19th, 2011
3:35 pm

SCool – The other night I dreamed I went to pay for a cup of coffee and realized I had been passed some counterfeit 100 dollar bills!

Wonder what that dream means?

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:35 pm

@ITL yep that’s me..I read all the Harry Potter’s book before seeing the movies. That way I can yell and say hey that is not how that happen. Now I can’t read or watch Stephen King..only movie I ever saw was misery. His mind is one scary place.

Kym

December 19th, 2011
3:38 pm

@disco. I was the only kid for seven years. So I have all the only kid traits, right along with the oldest child traits. I believe the clinical term would be spoiled, high achiever, co-dependence syndrome.

Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB

December 19th, 2011
3:38 pm

Kimmie- just wait, somebody got a Red Devil Dreambook, they give you a number for your dream and all…lol.

disco

December 19th, 2011
3:38 pm

kimmie – dreammoods.com has a dream interpretation dictionary. I looked up counterfeit:

To see counterfeit money in your dream indicates that you are feeling unworthy or that someone is devaluing your talents or efforts. Perhaps something is not what it appears to be. Alternatively, this dream symbol suggests that you are pretending to be something you are not.

Into the Light

December 19th, 2011
3:40 pm

It is indeed, Kym. He is the master of suspended disbelief. I tend to be a fairly pragmatic and logical girl, but reading his books….even if it was something you KNOW could never happen, I’d be like, “Well, maybe……” :) A friend of mine is in his play. Can’t WAIT to go see it.

disco

December 19th, 2011
3:41 pm

jake – now I haven’t seen a dream book with numbers in a minute – probably more than 30 years. I’ve got a few different dream books at home because I dream some crazy stuff each and every night so I’m always flipping through my dream book.