Introducing your date? Choose wisely
A reader is upset with her man because he decided to introduce her as a friend last weekend. They were at a restaurant and he ran into friends of his – all female. After months of dating, staying over, and acting a lot like “more than friends”, it bothered her that he doesn’t think they are at the stage of using the girlfriend-boyfriend label.
Is it important to name each other with a label? Should you have “the talk” of exclusivity so you know where you stand?
I don’t know the age of the woman who emailed me, but I suspect she is a little young and inexperienced with men. If things are going well, do you really need a guy to introduce you to other women as his woman?
Does it matter what they call you or how they treat you?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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355 comments Add your comment
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
8:33 am
Good Morning Lovelies!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
8:34 am
hmmmmmm @ the topic!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
8:41 am
Should you have “the talk” of exclusivity so you know where you stand? Absolutely isn’t that what adults do communicate effectively?!? Why mislead or prolong you either together as one exclusively or just dating openly I think……But at some point “the talk” should take place for clarity purposes so confusion in public will be minimum.
Is it important to name each other with a label? This is a Sex and the City moment…….Too old to say “boyfriend” and saying “my man” is a bit juvenile to a degree………so the label thingy isn’t life or death especially if you truly know where you stand. But if your throwing those labels out for passive aggressive purposes then there is a bigger problem and communication can cut the BS in a sense
Mike P
December 14th, 2011
8:43 am
This looks like an interesting topic. I am going to lurk and see what the ladies have to say on this topic.
Good Morning!
back in the dating world
December 14th, 2011
8:56 am
this is an interesting topic….i’m back in the dating world this year for the first time in 18 years. And was just talkingto my girlfriends aobut the how, when and if you have the “dating exclusively” talk…
I agree that as adults we shouldcommunicate openly and honestly, so it only makes sense to know where you stand with one another but how and when to broach the topic is a whole different matter….
I agree with mike p – i’ll be lurking around to see what the men haveto say
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
8:57 am
I always use the term “lady friend”…no matter how long I have been involved. At this age girlfriend” seems somehow to not fit.
This can be one of those Mars/Venus issues, however. Men as a rule, don’t care…unless the lady is a trophy or hood ornament of some type and the guy is into showing off like he would a fancy car or a Tag Heuer watch maybe. Women take roles more seriously generally. This is one of those small issues that if not watched, can cause heartburn with no ill intentions intended.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
8:59 am
Let’s see Significant Other, Husband, Wife, or Just Friends….Cut Buddies is understood correctly……Just Friends can be heartbreaking if you think it is more than what it is. Incongruousness does irk the hezzy out of me but its apart of the dating game. its on you on how you deal with it…..
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:01 am
Talking out of both sides of your mouth that is and men and women display this behavior.
KaiserSoze
December 14th, 2011
9:06 am
As long as the couple is clear and understands where the relationship is with each other, labels don’t really matter. I had the exclusivity talk with my girlfriend (used for gender clarity here) a couple of weeks ago and we both completely agreed to become a monogamous couple. We still introduce each other to our friends as “my friend” or just simply by name. The only exception is to our kids. Our kids (mine kids and her kids, not our kids) know of the other party as the boyfriend or girlfriend, but simply because that is terms they can grasp and understand.
In some situations it might be appropriate to use terms that indicate a relationship, but people in the group should be able to tell by your actions and the level of attention/attentiveness paid to the other party that they are more than “just a friend”. Actions always speak louder than words.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:07 am
Oh I could I forget Friends With Benefits! That is sticky too if not communicated properly!
KaiserSoze
December 14th, 2011
9:08 am
Lady – I personally don’t believe that FWB can be a good situation for anyone. But I’m an old-fashioned man that only believes in sexual relationships with someone that I am willing to enter into a relationship with. FWB rarely ends well according to the many of my friends that have been down that road. Seems one party almost always ends up hurt (which come to think of it isn’t really different from a “real” relationship).
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:10 am
yep KaiserSoze & words are inspired by actions……..non-verbals say much!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:11 am
I agree with you KaiserSoze but that type of relationship does exist for some and I won’t be blind too it.
disco
December 14th, 2011
9:11 am
good morning. I wouldn’t trip over this. depending on who I’m introducing someone to they might not get a title anyway. I’d just introduce with a name. they might not need to know that this is my friend/cousin/neighbor/whatever. OR I might just introduce with a title (friend/cousin/neighbor/whatever) and never even share the person’s name. I’ve even completely avoided introductions in some cases. everybody doesn’t always need to know everybody else. I know I’m an extreme case and have always played things close. twice I’ve been out with SO and ran into acquaintances – folks I’d worked with years prior. I didn’t bother with introductions. just did a real quick catch up and kept my business to myself. I made the point the other day that I’ve worked at my job for years and no one here even knows my son’s name. I’m sure someone in HR could look it up but I’ve never shared it with anyone. that’s just how I roll.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:12 am
Seems one party almost always ends up hurt <————-Always does bc for the most part one party wants more than is being offered and the other party is content with the set-up.
KaiserSoze
December 14th, 2011
9:15 am
You got it Lady – the FWB is almost always a result of one party being selfish and wanting nothing but the bootie, which leaves the other wanting more than just the physical aspects.
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
9:15 am
@ KaiserSoze…re: FWB. I was thinking the same thing about FWB before you posted. That is something of a new relationship (or has never until recently had a name brought out into the mainstream), and just does not feel right for me. I’ve thought about it…even contemplated approaching some exes with the idea…but my gut feeling is that one side or the other is almost always going to evaluate the relationship in a different way sooner or later. Too complicated, and I’m not into complicated anymore.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
9:16 am
Aye man, I thought titles were reserved for royalty. The Earl of Sandwich, Duchess so on and what not.
Listen, if she’s not your wife what’s wrong with just saying ‘hey this is — ——————- insert government name.
Just Sayin’
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:19 am
I remember being on a date last year around Thanksgiving @ a dinner party and my date was a bit older and the distinction was obvious so the party in front of us (two single ladies) just had to inquire once he went to the restroom. So she went on to say so what does your “Husband” do for a living. I never entertained the suggestion and answered her question indirectly kindly and went on to the next topic…..smirk folks can be amusing.
People Watching is fun though! lol
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:20 am
If she would have said daddy she would have been dismissed properly lmbao! smh
KaiserSoze
December 14th, 2011
9:23 am
@Randy – you and I must be cut from the same cloth. Life is too short for complicated socializing. My ex even offered to be FWB post-divorce, but I decided I would rather roll the dice and be celibate if necessary than continue with the potentially poisonous situation.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
9:25 am
@Lady
parties like that are always fun for me when folks get nosey I’ve been everything from a White Collar criminal to a Smoke Jumper Firefighter.
back in the dating world
December 14th, 2011
9:26 am
I agree that that giving titles is juvenile and that a “couple’s” actions should state to others what type of relationship they are in….
I’m more interested in the second topic/qustion Diva asked…”Should you have “the talk” of exclusivity so you know where you stand?” and the how to’s of that these days….
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
9:26 am
@KS…yup. No such thing as free sex…it all has a price tag of one kind or another.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:28 am
LOL Fion I would play the role right along with you too! give them some live entertainment and pretend gossip!
Linds
December 14th, 2011
9:28 am
My take on this is do not make assumptions. Just don’t do it! Men are NOT mind readers and we women have to stop assuming that they understand our concerns/frustrations (or even remember them) if we don’t bring it to their attention in a noticeable way. That’s not how men work and our sensitivity level needs to go down if we aren’t even willing to talk to them about it. After only a few months of dating, I understand that she may not yet know him well enough to say if he’s expected to say girlfriend or not, but to me, that’s all the more reason to be upfront with him and ask? If she likes him enough, then it should be a priority to have that talk of exclusivity. She shouldn’t make assumptions and neither one of them should be putting labels on anybody or their relationship if they don’t address it together. Act like adults already.
disco
December 14th, 2011
9:31 am
fion – I use the term government name all the time. once when I was a teenager someone called the house and asked for me by my government name. my mother told them they had the wrong number and hung up. took her a minute to remember that’s what she named me. when I sent out my son’s high school graduation announcements folks were calling each other trying to figure out who he was. obviously, they didn’t know his government name. and on the flip side – I protect my nicknames from folks who only know me by my government name. two different worlds. like having an alter ego.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:32 am
hmmmm Randy and Ks I know a 56 year old playing the FWB game! Those post dirvocce fols well some just want their freedom and play with whatever PYT willing to play. #truestory
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
9:33 am
Re: the talk. I’ve never totally understood why people have to make this so seemingly ‘formal’. For me it is just a casual comment about how I feel and how the lady responds. I’m basically very monogamous and I am either “feeling someone” or I’m not. If I am, why date around, why not just go with what I have? Same with the lady. If she is feeling me, then why date around. If she isn’t, then apparently I haven’t made much of an impression. I just can’t get this whole concept of trying to win someone over. If it doesn’t happen naturally, why try to force it?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:33 am
meant folks and KS that is! regards
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
9:34 am
Good morning…I’m on cloud 6.5
I can’t even read the comments yet because this caught my eye
Does it matter what they call you or how they treat you? The latter part of this question is a trick, right?
If we haven’t spoken of being exclusive, then I’m just a friend. If we’ve been sleeping together, spending time together, washing each other’s backs and fronts but not talking if we are “ONE” with each other, we are still just friends with benefits.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:34 am
but sometimes Randy its pulling teeth for some and I guess this could be a red flag or not if someone isn’t reading too much into it……….shrugs!
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
9:36 am
I know others do that Lady, I’m just not into using people or being used. One, life is too dayum short to trifle with things that have little or no meaning, and Two, people aren’t (or shouldn’t be considered) disposable items. My take anyway.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
9:38 am
@disco
Now that is funny.
lol !!!!!
KaiserSoze
December 14th, 2011
9:38 am
The “talk” doesn’t have to be some long, drawn out conversation. In my situation it was a simple statement over morning coffee. I just said that I think things are going well and I am ready to make this an exclusive thing. She told me she assumed that was already the case. I agreed and that was it. No reason to make it more than it is. It is a simple statement of future intentions.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
9:44 am
Good morning folks…if you heard your Significant Other refer to you as their ’special friend’ to someone of the opposite sex, what would you think about that?
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
9:44 am
@Lady ~ you know, FWB doesn’t need to be “communicated.” To me, it’s easily defined without saying so. All one has to do is look at the relationship, pay attention to what’s being discussed and what’s not being discussed. All you have to do is pay attention.
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
9:44 am
I totally understand what you are saying Leggs, but (don’t you just hate the…”but”), you are talking about ‘definitions’, not ‘perceptions’. One thing I learned when I was a stockbroker was that ‘perception IS reality”. What I am saying is that if one is ‘perceiving’ that it is FWB, that is his/her reality…but that does not automatically make it the other’s ‘reality’. The other may have and probably usually does have a totally different ‘perception’, and that is their ‘reality’…and a recipe for someone getting hurt. Better to have both with the same ‘reality’. Much less painful.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:45 am
lol ok Leggs understtod and understand ~It is what it is~ got you!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:46 am
understood that is!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:48 am
Now Slim that “Special Friend” is ummmmm hmmmmm well……as Leggs can say……..lol I have heard that Slim as a matter of fact I was in Birmingham on a date at a gala and the term was used. I rolled with it but my eye brows raised somewhat like what is that but I didn’t trip. I enjoyed the moment ironically
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
9:49 am
@SlimNu ~ “special friend” means you have meant just about everything on his checklist. Then again, it can mean your his special sexual friend. Put the words with how he treats you and you will have your answer.
Linds
December 14th, 2011
9:49 am
the talk for some, depending on the person and the nature of the relationship so far, can be very informal, 4-sentence conversation, while with others I could understand it being more drawn out discussion about intentions, the future, formalities, meeting the family, etc. I don’t think there’s one right way to do it, but being understanding and open is important either way. Everyone’s different and has experienced different things in past relationships, ergo, everyone may approach this “talk” in varying ways. Making sure that you feel secure in what you feel for this person and that you have your questions answered by the end of it is what matters.
disco
December 14th, 2011
9:50 am
fion – yeah. we got some nicknames for you. the current one that tickles outside folks is a little cousin that we’ve named “the little blue eyed boy”. he just turned 3. I figure as he gets older it’ll be shortened to blue eyed boy and ultimately we’ll probably just call him blue. what I do know for sure is that we’ll likely never call him by his government name.
slim nu – I wouldn’t trip off the title. either I know who I am in the relationship or I don’t. if I don’t, then I’ve still got some growing up to do. as the saying goes “it doesn’t matter what folks call you, it matters what you answer to”.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:50 am
see Leggs! Too funny!
Fion
December 14th, 2011
9:52 am
Let me ask ya’ll, when you here the term “Special Friend” don’t you translate / insert Fu*k Buddy?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:53 am
Fion that is what I pull out of it after the fact it is something understood whether you want that title or not…..lol
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
9:55 am
…and for the record by the way, the booty call can be gender neutral. I’ve been on both sides of this one. Feels weird for a guy to be used for sex, LOL, but it does happen. It is flattering but can be painful to the guy, so don’t just automatically assume that the guy is the one without feelings.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
9:56 am
when I’ve heard people say that, that’s what I hear. I kinda roll my eyes too and just go ok.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:56 am
~Where is the love you said was mine ALL mine til the end of time~ NP Where is the Love!
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
9:59 am
Good mornIng!
So Lady,if it were u,what term would u rather use..since girlfriend or my man is kinda juvenile or clingyish for u…(just asking)
I don’t see nothing wrong with boyfriend or girlfriend,depending on the age. Fortish to older having girlfriend boyfriend labels sounds just kinda hmmmmmm not quite appropriate…like u late to the party or something for that..
when a little younger than 40,then fine.
I would think just saying this is ‘Celisea’ or ‘Meelo’ is appropriate for older like folks. (40+)
At the end of the day,the label is not as important as how u two interact and whether u are secure in the relationship or maybe u are asked to come to his home at certain times and not others. Including whether you two intact when other folks are there from either side.
But if you have some privileges but NO Full Rights in the relationship,Listen!:
You on Rotation!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
9:59 am
I am firm believer though “The Writing Is Always On The Wall” and with that you rock and roll how you see fit……………..Be true to thy own self!
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
10:01 am
@ MEEELOW, re: “But if you have some privileges but NO Full Rights in the relationship,Listen!:
You on Rotation”!
You got it!
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
10:02 am
Morning All!
Well first, you should know where you stand well before you guys go out where introductions are necessary. Like Randy & Kaiser said, it doesn’t have to be a “formal” discussion. But it’s something you should never assume. Just because you guys are sleeping together and spending every extra moment outside of work with each other still does not mean you are exclusive in the minds of some. So get it out and understood.
As for introductions, I don’t know why you’ve got to have a label to do that. Like Fion said, just say, “hi this is _____”. Only time I inserted a label is when I got married and introduced him as my husband. Until then, he was just introduced as ______. I didn’t even introduce him as my fiance’ when we got engaged.
If you came to the party or gathering “together” folks can see you are more than just “friends”.
So if I am introduced as “just” your friend, does that mean I am free to get with someone else at the party if they catch my eye? Just asking since we haven’t had “the talk” yet!
Yeah, some folks are just that literal!!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:03 am
Exiled if I am in monogamous relationship the title would be understood without the title……..my actions would convey I am his lady an he would reciprocate without confusion sir.
Randyt (aka. walk softly, some women can get touchy about this).
December 14th, 2011
10:03 am
“If things are going well, do you really need a guy to introduce you to other women as his woman?’
If one is confident, nope.
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
10:07 am
@Lady ~ too funny, but SexyC put “Ummmm….well………ok” on the blog map!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:08 am
I know she did but I was lost for words bc you told the truth. I was just being diplomatic!
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
10:08 am
Lady?
Ok I got u…
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:10 am
Full Rights do ROCK hard though, digressing softly~ #crackingup lol
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
10:11 am
If u a at a party and he disappears for what seems like long periods,cones back and disappears again…like that:
He is re-arranging his lady decks…u on rotation lady!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:12 am
Exiled! that hasn’t happened to me @ a party but I see your point……
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
10:18 am
Lady..I like ur sense of humor…u really crack me up when u laugh..
U so easy to relate to…u kinda late tho..
This blog cracks me up..the foolishness,the inexperience,the playa calls
Just hilarious!
(my folks here are always rolling their eyes coz I laugh loud abd they don’t know)
Thank u MIA for the foolishness!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:20 am
LMBAO Exiled!
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
10:23 am
Exiled – Your 10:11 – yep!
disco
December 14th, 2011
10:27 am
well heck – let’s jump right into that one. y’all want to throw out some pointers “you know you are in the rotation when __________” or “I discovered I was part of a rotation when ________”.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:29 am
Fantasia had her healthy baby boy in other entertainment news from her boo~ Go Tasia~
Fion
December 14th, 2011
10:32 am
I knew I was in the rotation when I asked for a toothbrush and she said they in the drawer on the left. When I looked there , there had to be at least 10 in the drawer.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
10:32 am
I knew I was part of a rotation when he snuck off and was in the hospital for 2 days having surgery without telling me.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
10:33 am
Fion – Do you think she might have purchased one of those bulk packs of toothbrushes from Sams or Costco?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:34 am
Fion red flag on the play! I’ve seen that foolishness too I just shook my head! #dead I cut that ish short too bc I didn’t want to play! LMBAO!
Fion
December 14th, 2011
10:35 am
ok kimmie, yeah right. I got a beach front Condo in Omaha I’ll Sub-let to you.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:36 am
how about that 72 hour grace period by the third day you here from the person maybe a text or two in the 48 hours but a live convo by the third day…..smh lol I am glad I can laugh @ this now a few yesars back I was pissed like What the hell is wrong with me?!? lol
Fion
December 14th, 2011
10:37 am
I’ll tell all the female playa’s out there. It’s hard to play a Playa. Hell we know all the moves.
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
10:38 am
Anybody listen to that J Cole song in vee
The beat?
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
10:38 am
On vee
disco
December 14th, 2011
10:39 am
fion – I agree with kimmie – I’ve got a stash of toothbrushes and other toiletries. I even keep a “man stash” – masculine soap, deodorant, neutral lotion. after my son moved out I didn’t think about it but once a cousin rolled through and had to make a store run before taking a shower because he didn’t want to leave my house smelling like a girl. since then I try to be accommodating.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:41 am
The watcher watching the watcher…..yeah it is what it is!
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
10:42 am
Fion – LOL!! Just sayin, could have been perfectly innocent!
But in all honesty, I used to buy those big 10-packs to keep around. I had family & friends to spend the night from time to time. Any good host has plenty toothbrushes, soap and clean towels available for guests.
But you were seeing this woman, so you knew what the real deal was!
Fion
December 14th, 2011
10:45 am
@disco
Listen, if you feelin the man tell him to bring his bag. We what that means. Now if you tellin me you free and clear and I roll up in there and you stocked up better than any GI Barracks. Sheeeeeeet Houston we got a problem.
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
10:47 am
@Llady ~ I now have that song in my head “Where is the love….”
“If u a at a party and he disappears for what seems like long periods,cones back and disappears again…like that:
He is re-arranging his lady decks…u on rotation lady” – NOPE!!! He’s in the bathroom doing cocaine!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:48 am
Leggs not drugs?!? I will leave that mofo there @ the party! 0_o
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
10:48 am
I like being the watcher watching the watcher…it’s fun.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:50 am
Leggs when you saw me @ the gas station that night and the party I went to you know I cut it short bc it just didn’t seem right…….Some monkey business was going on and I promise I just knew one host so I was a bit standoffish so I just left kindly bc who knew what was up in there……..
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:51 am
Leggs VERY fun! lol I master it!
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
10:51 am
O/T – Man, I tell ya, December is not the month to lose weight. It’s THE month to hit the gym hard and long. Every week in December lunch and breakfast, Assistants’ luncheon yesterday, company wide luncheon today. Gotta pick and choose. Got a bad stomach ache yesterday on my way back to work….
back to regluarly scheduled broadcasting…
disco
December 14th, 2011
10:51 am
fion – I was seeing a guy for 3 years who always would stop and buy a toothbrush when staying over. he was well aware of my stash but because he just brushed his teeth and threw out the toothbrush he didn’t want to deplete my stash. he wouldn’t take the brush home and I sure as heck wasn’t giving him a designated brush at my house. definitely don’t play that. now me, myself, personally – I keep a “just in case” bag in my car. you never know when you might pull an all nighter.
leggs – not that you went and opened up a whole new can of worms. dang. hope chick notices dude has the sniffles when he comes back.
disco
December 14th, 2011
10:55 am
oh – and fion – if toiletries get a brother. I feel sorry for the man who snoops and finds the guest room closet filled with men’s suits and coats.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:56 am
Leggs enjoy your month honey!
I am ready to cook some of Christmas dinner sorta….I am doing a beef brisket, apple pie, and a pineapple upside down cake….simple pleasures! foodie in progress! lol I think I am going to smoke the brisket too!
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
10:57 am
I keep my toothbrush, deodorant, body wash etc at the honeycomb hideout…
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
10:59 am
If I had my own spot, he’d have a key and could leave whatever would make his stay more comfortable at my place as well…
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:59 am
you should Slim!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
10:59 am
Slim do you have a key to his place?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:00 am
hmmmmm the key topic!
thewindwhistler
December 14th, 2011
11:00 am
She was only a friend
She wanted to be more
She is no friend no more
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:00 am
but that is apart of Full Rights so I can dig it!
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:03 am
@ disco
I feel ya. You know for a fact, if a woman comes to your house and have above the norm in female accomodations she is going to start thinking ” who does he have all this for”.
disco
December 14th, 2011
11:04 am
slim – the key??? I’ve had folks look at me incredulously when I announced that no has EVER had a key to my house. sure my son has a key and my brother has had a key in the past but no significant other has ever had a key. i figure when we share a house (legally), we’ll share a key. other than that, you are still technically just a visitor.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:06 am
@disco
I’m with you on that one. 11:04 post. When I roll out my grip goes with me. When you come through please do the same.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
11:08 am
Yeah, clothes and feminine products up in a dudes place would raise my eyebrows more than just a bunch of toothbrushes would.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:09 am
I’ve only exchanged keys once and the marriage license was the binding document. lol prior to that literally shacking up with the same man I married….so I’ve never shared a key or place with another man. sleepovers sure thing but that’s about it!
disco
December 14th, 2011
11:09 am
slim – I forgot to mention – honeycomb hideout? that was funny.
fion – sho you right. I’d be like “umm. sweetie. is there a reason there’s a summer’s eve in your bathroom”…
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:10 am
I’ve had 2- Major fall outs with women that wanted to move in with me and got beside themselves when I said no.
I still scratch my head about that.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:11 am
I don’t knock it though if it works for you rock an droll with it………oh with the ex boyfriend I had the garage opener briefly and I mean briefly he got that back quick so I don’t even count that lol
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:11 am
meant roll!
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:13 am
….and I’ve had it the other way when keys were offered to me. Nope, that’s ok. I not gonna be there when u ain’t there anyway.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:14 am
the thing with the key to me is playing house and getting comfy especially if you want to be married sooner than later…..its a slippery slope somewhat
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:15 am
meant I’m not gonna……
Ms.Atl
December 14th, 2011
11:15 am
Any couple should communicate concerning monogamy to make sure they are on the same page. Regarding labels; I agree that “boyfriend” sounds a bit juvenile for a mature person and “man” sounds funny as well. For some reason, you can get away with saying “girlfriend” for more years than “boyfriend.” Personally, I can be introduced by my government name or as “friend” because how a person treats me is much more important. Whatever title you ascribe to a person, if your behavior says I don’t care about you, the title does not matter. thus, if she was introduced as his friend but his behavior showed she was more, cool beans. Finally, are his introductions and treatment consistent whether they are around males or females??
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
11:16 am
@disco ~ EXACTLY….some are cool with it and some not so much! Along with watching the sniffles, watch the lips (mouth lips, Ex). It becomes crooked!
I need to write a what to watch out for book on cocaine (lol).
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:17 am
Now I’m not knocking anybody. I stated my postion here many times. I don’t do the live together thing.
@Lady
“the thing with the key to me is playing house and getting comfy ”
Bingo
i'm swiss™
December 14th, 2011
11:20 am
Morning, folks.
On topic: Pffft, amateur. When in doubt, just don’t use titles. “Pookie, this is [insert name here]. [Insert name here] this is Pookie.”. Boom. Enough said.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
11:21 am
Hey Swiss Beatz!! I agree!
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
11:22 am
I’ve had 2- Major fall outs with women that wanted to move in with me and got beside themselves when I said no. – HUH???
They must have had a hidden agenda that you didn’t know about…like, they were tired of paying their own rent (lol).
I’ve never given anyone a key to my place other than my husband and I got that key back
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
11:22 am
Lady – yes I have a key
i'm swiss™
December 14th, 2011
11:23 am
What’s up, kimmie? How you doin’? Did you catch that Boardwalk Empire finale?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:24 am
Good Slim! Enjoy your boo!~
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:24 am
lol Leggs!
disco
December 14th, 2011
11:26 am
fion/lady – and not saying I don’t want a guy to be comfortable in my home. he can be comfortable. what I don’t want is for him to be TOO comfortable. true story: probably about 15 or so years ago a friend introduced me to her cousin. while going out things were cool enough. on a visit to my home he took his shoes off (without asking if it was okay) and that irked me but I said nothing. when he asked my son to bring him a glass of juice without first asking me if he could even have some juice – that did it. that joker had to go.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
11:27 am
Swiss – Yes I did!! All the slowness of the season earlier was made up for in the last 2-3 episodes, including the finale!! I think Margaret’s days are numbered next season.
I really liked Angela & Jimmy!! His sick mama needed to go instead of him. His story line was so sad!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:27 am
NP After the Love Gone E,W&F! Classic!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:28 am
disco that is a hot mess and cause to be dismissed that is damn disrespectful…….
OAN Disco I am yet to date with my child being apart yet……..one day but not today
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:30 am
meant After the Love Is Gone. I can’t mess that great song up! lol Sing Elements!
i'm swiss™
December 14th, 2011
11:31 am
kimmie — Re: Margaret… Aw hellz yes, her days need to be numbered.
I wanted to come through the TV & choke a b!tch my d@mn self when she signed over that land to the church! 
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
11:32 am
Cold cut artist is Mary J…(4) 741-1075
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:34 am
I absolutely adore Mary J and I pray she comes to Chastain this summer as I refused to go to the Tabernacle (dislike this venue) to see her recently! Her new CD is the truth.com! love it!
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
11:34 am
Disco – because he had that not so fresh feeling lol
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:35 am
@Leggs
ya know 1-of them really was in Love with me and wanted to get married the whole 9. I wasn’t even remotely there. The other 1- deep down I ddidn’t trust her. I just felt she was up to something.
Audra
December 14th, 2011
11:36 am
How ’bout “This is Audra.” Let THEM figure out what you are to him/he is to you. It’ll become clear anyway, either you’ll be gone or walking down the aisle sooner or later! IMHO you don’t have to specify anything, ‘cuz it’t not their biz anyway.
Audra
December 14th, 2011
11:37 am
Furthermore, if he said something like “this is my boo” or my lady, or my girl, or whatever, it would skeez me out!
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
11:39 am
Swiss – Margaret is just another example of these women that KNOWINGLY marry into the mob, but have NO IDEA what it means to be a mafia wife! You keep your MOUTH SHUT and know your place!!
The only mob wife with some sense was Carmela Soprano!!!
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
11:40 am
@Fion ~ how the heck can someone be really in love with another and want to marry and the other person isn’t even remotely feeling the same? That’s truly messed up.
@Lady ~ I won tickets last year to see Mary J at Chastain. Seats WAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY in the back, but had a good picnic basket with wine, fruit, cheese, crackers and SHRIMP (lol)…
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
11:41 am
I would not want anyone I’m sleeping with introduce me as their mofo “boo!”
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:41 am
Now Leggs I will buy them straight up and sit in the Terraces! I love up front @ Chastain with everything you mention! Made a great sangria for the Jill Scott Block party. I was toasty that night! lol
disco
December 14th, 2011
11:42 am
lady – understood and I generally don’t (didn’t) do the stray men around the kid thing but his cousin and I were good friends (heck all these years later we are still friends) so he got a waiver. that’s one good thing about hookups. if you trust your friend’s judgment it makes that adjustment a tad bit easier.
slim – and that’s what I’d be questioning. that not so fresh feeling. I’ve been told by gay male friends that they take care of that not so fresh feeling…
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:43 am
That’s exactly what I said.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:46 am
Leggs got a joke for ya! This dude I met @ a Falcons game at the start of the season text me yesterday the normal how are you how is work stuff…..I said fine. (prior when convo was steady he mention us doing the Kem concert) so I respond I am well. and then a few minutes later I text and said so are we doing Kem’s concert. It was a dead silence for a hour or so. then I noticed it and text back and said I was just kidding and not to work to hard and he said oh you good I was in a meeting and that ceased the convo…..too funny. I never felt dude that is why it never progress (incongruousness)
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
11:47 am
Why did the dang radio station just hang up on me??????:”
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:47 am
I did feel the need to call his bluff! devil’s advocate! lol
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
11:48 am
Yeah, he was in a meeting of the minds trying to come up with a decent response! PUNK!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:49 am
No would have sufficed what in the hell could I have done?!? Not a damn thing but laugh! lol
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:51 am
i said damn I know how to get rid of them! o_0 lolol
Dude
December 14th, 2011
11:52 am
Just got here, I am too lazy/busy to read everything else-So on the topic
Quit complaining how you are introduced, you have a positive and negative spectrum, if you are refered to as friend that is still positive, if you are refered to as this is the person I am porking this week, that may go the other way.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:53 am
@Lady
it’s stuff like that, that makes it hard out here for everybody else. It’s all upside down.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
11:55 am
yep Fion you are correct!
Adam Lambert
December 14th, 2011
11:56 am
let’s see now. “a little young and inexperienced with men,” yet she parks her “stuff” in the dude’s house for “months” playing HOUSE giving it ALL up for free despite Beyonce yelling to girls LIKE HER that the man needs to be putting a “ring on it” and now lil girl is upset to find out she ain’t his queen so what do we have: another stupid thing women do to mess up their lives…
Fion
December 14th, 2011
11:58 am
@disco
You know you are in the rotation, when you can reach them through the week and the weekend is nothing but crickets. They reemerge on Tuesday.
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
12:05 pm
You know they’re trying to put you on rotation when you only hear from them starting around 8:45pm.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:06 pm
I believe you only play the fool for one person. It not right to continue the fool act. Sure many more mistakes or bad decision continue but you quickly correct and alter and move on than playing the drawn out fool out. I can’t bc I have and its not fun.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:08 pm
ok y’all I see one thing I will get my lil girl….that is it…..she has been asking for it for 3 months daily…..amazon has it! sigh
Fion
December 14th, 2011
12:10 pm
@Lady
I’m playin’ 1208 box today because of that post.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:14 pm
save me a martini if you hit sir!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:17 pm
ok got another joke. I am absolutely SOUP out! just finished vegetable soup and a turkey sammich with hot chocolate! over it! lol not even doing black eye peas for c’mas…….lol#dead
what another comfort food?!?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:19 pm
Monday was bone cold and I made a huge pot and since its been 70 degrees!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:20 pm
where are you all @?!? lol
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
12:22 pm
What is that one thing you’re getting her, Lady?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:23 pm
a dammit Password Journal Leggs……everyday MOMMY I WANT A PASSWORD JOURNAL! errr’day!
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
12:23 pm
I made homemade chicken noodle soup last night since my child is sick. Now it’s 70 freaking degrees which means she’ll probably get sicker….
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:25 pm
hope she feels better Leggs! knock on wood lil mama hasn’t been sick yet and I am glad. 6 year old has been fun I can’t lie! we have come a long way!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:27 pm
I just happened to price it Leggs and its affordable. I hate going shopping so thanks the Lord for the world wide web but I am done. LAst year I was an online shopping freak not this year. Her daddy got her the Leap Frog Ipad thingy. hell that is more than enough bc she already has a DS3.
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
12:32 pm
I haven’t purchased nare gift….yet.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:33 pm
don’t feel bad. bc I don’t at all!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:34 pm
So what’s the afternoon topic?
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
12:36 pm
I thought we would be on a roll with “know when you’re a rotation,” but that died rather quickly.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:36 pm
QOTD via FB: People often say opposites attract, do you believe in this statement or do you feel people with similarities produce stronger relationships?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:38 pm
Leggs cause this ish is cray and played out like an 8-track! lol
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
12:40 pm
here is one more and I am done this is also via FB and the person who posted it needs to sit down somewhere lol #bias
Today’s query: Does money or lack of it determines success or failure? Women could you date a broke man and men could you date a broke woman?
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
12:50 pm
Oh…we are JUST friends?!? LMAO! Make ‘em stop.
I haven’t read any of the posts, but really, why did he have to introduce her as anything? Why not, “Hi, this is Mallory.”?
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
12:55 pm
SCool – I thought the same thing. I also asked, well since we are just friends and I just rode to the party with you, does that mean I am free to mix & mingle? Can I hook up with someone else if they catch my eye? I mean, we’re just friends and all.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
12:59 pm
I also still don’t see how having a bunch of extra, unused toothbrushes means you’ve got a big rotation.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
1:01 pm
Kimmie – I also still don’t see how having a bunch of extra, unused toothbrushes means you’ve got a big rotation.
Just folks talking to hear themselves talk….and flexing all for nothing…lol
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
1:01 pm
And, don’t get mad when I open the drawerr and it’s full of condoms…be thankful…
I kid, I kid…I dont have such a draw. (lol).
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:03 pm
funny leggs funny!
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
1:04 pm
Hell, a bunch of toothbrushes, men suits/clothing, etc makes me wonder just how much traffic is rolling through…lol
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:06 pm
exactly C but anyway its neither here nor there…….folks know what they truly dealing with and so did I. no the toothbrush wasn’t the determine factor but it contributed lol smh lol
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
1:06 pm
Extra toothbrushes = big rotation, huh?
What about a big box of condoms?
(lol)
But seriously, (and I know that I’ve posted this before) back in the day, I did end up telling a guy, “Um, yeah, really dude, considering that you supposedly live by yourself and all, you really should have swept your bathroom. There is hair from the chick who is normally here all over it.”
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
1:07 pm
Celisea – Clothing is one thing, some common toiletry items that either gender can use bought in bulk is something different.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:08 pm
SC I was going to post a hair roller story but I didn’t but I get your post. Too funny!
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
1:08 pm
Exactly Kimmie….
I thought in skimming I saw someone with a stash of suits and stuff….shoot I can’t be “entertaining” on that level…lol
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
1:09 pm
My new addiction – Publix Diet Green Tea.
#CompletelyRandomIsh
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
1:12 pm
I’ve been told by gay male friends that they take care of that not so fresh feeling…
disco – Um…a little late but heyal nawwwww
Speaking of having a drawer full of condoms…I’ll never forget my ex and I had just got back in town from some vacation. He used to keep his safe in his closet…so I guess with getting ready for the trip, in a hurry he forgot to close it. So when we got back and unpacked you could clearly see a HUGGEEEE roll of condoms in the safe. I’m looking at him like, Is it that damn serious?? Are you doing that much f’kkin??!!! Talk about a buzz kill to the trip high.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
1:15 pm
This is so cool – http://www.amazon.com/Koolatron-BC10-G-Coca-Cola-15-Can-Capacity-Bottle-Shaped/dp/B0022NGSS6
#CompletelyRandomIsh
#IshINeverKnewExisted
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
1:17 pm
You are in rotation or serving rotation if one enters via the cooter and exit via the ass….lol
let me stop
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:19 pm
interesting Slim……lol
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:20 pm
I just read RHOA Rodeny Ho’s blog its funny as always! smh lol
Kym
December 14th, 2011
1:23 pm
Good Afternoon Turtledoves!
I am feeling Christmasy today.. I think we have discussed this topic a few times before soo since most of the time I agree with kimmie..my response is whateva she said. Now what is the new topic?
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:23 pm
@ SlimNu
Do you know what the pen!s said to the condom…”Cover me, I’m going in”..
Okay not that great, but is mercifully short.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
1:25 pm
Kym –
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
1:25 pm
SC – Yeah dem herrrrs will get ya errrry time. lol I know my hair sheds a lot so I try to sweep and vacuum before I leave his house, especially if i’ve been over there a couple of days. I don’t do it to clear the trail for him when I’m not there, but just as a courtesy as far as respecting his house.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:25 pm
@ Sexycool…I had to explain a bottle of Vagisil in my night stand…frankly no good answer so the best I could do was say, “that’s been there for awhile, sorry”.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:25 pm
Randy dry humor lol but short enough lol
Kym
December 14th, 2011
1:25 pm
@Slim..I didn’t know they sold condoms on the roll. Wow!
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:28 pm
@ Lady, yeah, don’t ya just hate a bad joke that is really long…torture.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
1:31 pm
Kym – I think he must’ve went to Sam’s….it was a long strand of Trojan’s Ultra Sensitive her pleasure or something like that.
Randy – I’ll let that one slide this time but don’t let it happen again. lol
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
1:31 pm
Slim – I sweep/wipe the bathroom regularly, as well.
The weekend that we were in Miami, we spent it with TheDude’s aunt and uncle. Her house was so clean that I was able to walk all around her house in a new pair of white socks (we had to take our shoes off at the door.) and they didn’t get dirty AT ALL. AND…there was NO DUST anywhere in their house.
#SimplyFrickinAmazing
Since we’ve been home, I’ve been even more conscious about cleaning and really staying on top of my daily chores. (I had gotten a little lazy/complacent.)
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:33 pm
90 more minutes! yay!
Kym
December 14th, 2011
1:33 pm
@RandyT…okay the book(Girl with the Dragon Tattoo) has picked up..are you reading it now?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:34 pm
Its such a beautiful day and i am free as bird! I shouldn’t run straight home like I plan to………hmmmmmm
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
1:34 pm
Speaking of the rotation topic, I know someone close to me that deals with a dude she can never find on the weekends. She even noticed that he had a ‘booty bag’ in his back seat once.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:36 pm
It is kind of odd though. men can get by with condoms in their houses…but if there is any sign that a lady has camped there some, i.e. toothbrushes and feminine items…and ‘the waste matter can hit the Westinghouse’.
Actually, most women are pretty dignified about it…at least I’ve been lucky. So far, no Fatal Attraction.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:36 pm
See Slim as I said folks do know! lol wow
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:38 pm
NP Luther Vandross Wait for Love! #goodone
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:38 pm
Kym, hoping to start it in the next couple of days…maybe tonight, or tomorrow at the gym. Movie is coming out soon…at least the new American version i understand.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
1:38 pm
I can remember when I allowed myself to be rotated.
#GotDamnedDummy
#LiveAndLearn
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
1:38 pm
Random: You know yo azz is greedy when they are sickly full from lunch but still proceeds to eat this moist guuuuuud chocolate cake.
Kym
December 14th, 2011
1:38 pm
uh off topic but don’t condom go bad? I mean if dude had like a Y2K supply of them wouldn’t at some point they kind of dry out?
Kym
December 14th, 2011
1:41 pm
@RandyT..yeah I saw that with the guy who played James Bond. I hope they keep it true to the book. But you know hollyweird
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:44 pm
They can dry out, or used to. When i was in junior high school we would carry them around in our wallets to make it look like we were doing something, then change them out when they got old looking, LOL. Coolest dude in the class carried two. took years to figure out he wasn’t doing anything either.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:46 pm
wow DCSC suspends all band activities! Whew lawd!
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
1:48 pm
2011 has been one for the books!
Kym
December 14th, 2011
1:50 pm
No more band in Dekalb County wow..well I kind of knew that was coming. Too many folks doing too much..oh well.
i'm swiss™
December 14th, 2011
1:50 pm
“Coolest dude in the class carried two.”
Randy — That must meant he targeted the questionable booty, so he needed to go 2-ply on that cooter.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:51 pm
Where has ITL gone? Haven’t seenher on line since the LSU game.
i'm swiss™
December 14th, 2011
1:51 pm
*”just meant”, not “must meant”
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
1:51 pm
That must meant he targeted the questionable booty, so he needed to go 2-ply on that cooter.
I bet there are many many times, the “eye” going in wants to back up but since it ain’t driving ain’t got a say so. I bet if it could speak wonders would be told
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
1:51 pm
#GotDamnedDummy
SC, when I read that for whatever reason it was in the voice of Red Fox when he was on Sanford & Son
As far as drying out, i thought that was more of a case if they are in your wallet, car, purse or anywhere in a rather hot spot. I don’t see them drying out that easily sitting in a nightstand drawer. I would be more concerned with them breaking due to the breakdown of the chemical/material if you hold onto them for too long
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
1:53 pm
I get it ’swiss’ …it wasn’t that he wasn’t, it was that he was dipping in places he didn’t want known. In time, all is clear.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
1:53 pm
Hello:
Introduce folks as friends and that can’t go wrong. If it’s more than that people will know by your actions.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
1:54 pm
Slim – that’s exactly how I said it to MYself…(lmao)
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
2:00 pm
@Slim?
ur coota is Bushy?!
Damn my Jesus!!!
Ideal image Hello
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
2:03 pm
@ Celisea…it would say, “PLEASE, NO, don’t make me go in there…it’s wet, and sticky, and dark, nnnooooo (as it fades away)”. Then a few minutes, later, “yyyuuuccccckkkk, get this wet sticky rubber off of me, you jerk…and thanks a lot!!”.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:05 pm
LOL Randyt….I don’t doubt it…LOL
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
2:05 pm
The ole comdom in the wallet, every young boy back then carried them for months and it was known nobody was using them. Another step towards manhood made all the guys want one.
disco
December 14th, 2011
2:06 pm
celisea/lady – in my defense, my closet full of mens’ clothing are remnants of my son. when he left for school he didn’t take everything. I don’t have general clothes though, mainly suits and coats.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
2:08 pm
yup Blackfoote…and God help you if your Mama found it…you’d be up the creek and not even have had anything to show for it.
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
2:08 pm
U wanna back up coz it’s what Cee?
it’s humongous?
but the chronic is saying get it down ???
it’s 2oclock
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:09 pm
Randyt – LOL…trying explain something to your mama and all for nothing…lol
Sort of like the scene in Crazy Stupid Love where the girl take nudie pics of herself and her mom finds them and her dad goes in for the kill…lol That was a cute movie
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
2:10 pm
Disco you know you and that is cool pay me no mind or my mindless chatter lol
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
2:12 pm
LOL…..@RandyT
After she finds it expect the body piercing stare, then she’ll say you better not be getting nobody pregnant I aint paying for no babies for you.
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
2:12 pm
Slim
are u adept at taking them from the night stand drawer at 3:00 am?
the coolest time to get some..sleepy baby..hmmmmmm…
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:13 pm
MMeello – U wanna back up coz it’s what Cee? it’s humongous? but the chronic is saying get it down ???
Okay I shouldn’t laugh and perpetuate but this was funny as heck when I read it… Tell me, as of today if you’re for real on some of the stuff you say or you just adding to the flow?
Dern it I wanted to listed to Ave Maria by Kelly Price on my phone but it won’t play on mobile and YouTube is blocked at work
Kym
December 14th, 2011
2:15 pm
@RandyT that has really changed over time..the whole dont let mama find the condom because most of the moms I know they are giving the son condoms. No one is trying to be a grandma..or deal with health issues
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
2:15 pm
I would state to her that’s what the condoms are for to prevent babies. She’ll hit back with, you’re too young to be having sex anyway.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
2:17 pm
@ blackfoote…for me another azz beating…to go with my already huge collection.
disco
December 14th, 2011
2:17 pm
lady – I think that needed clarifying. I figured some here know I have a 22 year old son and might have made that connection about the closet. still – if you all knew me you’d know that nothing of a grown man’s will be left up in my spot. there will be no marking YOUR territory in MY territory. forget something if you want to. I’ll be talking about “finders keepers, losers weepers”.
kym – re no one is trying to be a grandma. as the mother of a son I advised him to advise the little girls that his momma wasn’t claiming jack.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
2:19 pm
Kym:
In those day’s the emphasis was, you better not be having sex at all. Totally different today, they should be supplied to all boys for free.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
2:20 pm
cool beans disco! I want a son silently but digressing it ain’t happening lol so I could imagine the territory markings! lol
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
2:20 pm
yup, as Bob Dylan said, so long ago, “The times they are a changin…” It was different for sure in the country back then. The switch, the broom, the belt…yup they didn’t try to reason with you back then…just used the “Board of Education” to make you permanently remember the consequences of un-called for behavior…LOL.
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
2:21 pm
Cel?
‘the eye going in wants to back up but….’
that’s when my graphic imagination kicked in
Maybe a misinterpretation of ur intentention on my part but….
wasn’t sure u meant that or not
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
2:23 pm
RandyT:
Yep after the glaring stare came the ass whooping. Sometimes just for saying the word sex.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
2:23 pm
Exiled – Where in the world did you get that my cooter is bushy? I swear you often see things that are not there. Wipe the fog off your spectacles will ya
Oh, and there is never a time frame for condom use whether it be 3:00am or 3pm.
Kym
December 14th, 2011
2:26 pm
@Disco.. that’s exactly what I told my son..Put her, her daddy, her mama and all of them on notice..I am not helping with anything. Not a diaper, bottle, nothing. Matter of fact they better get use to seeing your face cause you won’t be bring no baby here.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
2:26 pm
C – Did you fall for the Dirty Dancing BIG Move that Ryan Gosling did in that movie? I really enjoyed that flick.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
2:26 pm
LOL at Slim…you are in a no win situation now. you have to now decide whether to tell are you bushy, waxed, neatly trimmed or what. Exiled has $ucked you in.
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
2:26 pm
Cel?
I know Lady will laugh at this..
coz I have had tales of chics who,when they are ready,she laying on the bed waiting on him to finish up undressing,and he removes that thing from around his waist, they go:
Screammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Bail Out!
Exiled!
December 14th, 2011
2:29 pm
Slim?
coz u said u have to sweep coz ur hairs will be All over!
(I read)
U didn’t clarify where they coming from
Armpits?
Back?
Head?
Legs?
Cooter?
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
2:29 pm
SMH Exiled! #dead
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:33 pm
Mmeello – No that’s what I meant and I followed what you said…sometimes you’re so graphic and just “out with it” that I wonder if you’re just making statements for the blog
Yeah times are a changing…..Well I had the convo with my kid and her “friend” with them together, straight faced with no chaser. I’m not naieve AT ALL but I wanted to put it out there and get it said. Just because they’re fast and mannish (like the old folks use to say) don’t mean we can’t get it said still. Part of what I said to them was around feeling each other up, sex the whole nine yards. I told them what’s running through their minds is what’s going through any other (today’s) youth and “getting it” and being grown. I said play with it if you want to but I’m telling you right now if you create it, make it, come up with it, find it, go get it, invent it…..IT YOURS…period point blank. I said if I didn’t make it, come up with it, hump to get it…it ain’t mine so don’t look for me to lift a finger with it. I said to her you’re raised to be head and shoulders above the rest and all the crap you see on a daily, I expect you to do as you’re taught not what you see, that when you’re with him and no one else is around I don’t expect you to “ho”…..and I told him, she ain’t a wh@re, b@tch or any other name loosely tossed around these days. Don’t call her that and don’t treat her as such. And I ended with don’t you EVER put your hands on her. THEN I marched him through uncles, brothers and cousins for grilling. I told both them I ain’t under a rock, don’t live under a rock so I know what’s up but I ain’t about to run behind folks policing either.
Slim – Girrrrl, it was corny when he was explaining but I can see how he pulled it off. I LOVE that movie. It was so cute and yes ma’am he is a hawtie
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
2:37 pm
“Exiled has $ucked you in.”
Randy – Um…naw he hasn’t. He hardly $ucks his own Queen
Payback is a mutha ain’t it 
Exiled – The hair comes from the bottom of my feet if you must know
C – He’s my new caucasian crush
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
2:38 pm
Lawd C I ain’t ready! Good Job sis!
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:38 pm
Slim – I can see anybody crushing on him
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
2:39 pm
disco
December 14th, 2011
2:40 pm
celisea – not that you had the male reinforcements on the ready. that’s what’s up. I don’t have a daughter but if I did she would have been on something as soon as she needed to be. a lot of folks say that encourages the negative behavior (whisper “s-e-x”) but I’m operating off of two quotes: old enough to bleed, old enough to breed and better safe than sorry. still – I can’t help but gloat “glad I had a boy, glad I had a boy”….
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
2:41 pm
Celisea:
LOL…..that’s what up. Lay down the demands and Believe sending him to the brothers and uncles made an impression he wont forget, I know from experience most all young males go through it.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:41 pm
Lady – You’re more ready than you think…yes ma’am you are.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
2:45 pm
C you are sorta right this past Monday sorta proved that @ her social studies fair! Motherhood is a special journey! Thanks sis!
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:45 pm
Exactly disco exactly. I got a girl and I’ll say it fast tail…lol If she snap another dang pose Imma scream.
Blackfoote – He was “yes ma’am, yes ma’am yes ma’am” the whole time. Had him sitting with his legs closed like a girl. I know though, that’s just around me…lol
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:45 pm
You got it Lady…it’s in you. You’ve already traveled the road? Then you’re equipped with what you need.
Lady~Back to life, Back to reality!
December 14th, 2011
2:49 pm
Disco making me scream and RUN! but I so feel you! whew lawd! OK I am gone lol!!!!
Enjoy your evenings folks!
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
2:52 pm
I don’t have a daughter but if I did she would have been on something as soon as she needed to be
disco – That’s the same way my mom thought. As soon as I turned 16 she told me she was taking me to the ob/gyn to be put on birth control. I was not thinking about sex AT ALL and actually ended up crying about it. She said, it wasn’t that she didn’t trust or even that she thought I was active. She basically said she would not be with me 24/7 and she much rather be safe than sorry. She had me when she was 16 going on 17…Here I am 33 and still no babies. So I suppose it goes along with all the other life lessons, foundation, moral values etc that a parent gives a child. If yo mama is known for giving out cooter coupons, then you can’t expect the child to be much different.
disco
December 14th, 2011
2:52 pm
celisea/lady – well the bright side is that the mother of the little girls calls the shots. I drilled that one into my son so much during those high school years that he probably still hears it in his sleep. i made sure he understood that if he got caught up the little girl’s MOTHER held his life/future in HER hands. she decided whether her daughter had a baby or kept a baby while he and I had to sit back and accept that woman’s decision.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 14th, 2011
2:53 pm
You’ve planted fear in his mind, you had him listening with his legs closed. That’s equivalent to a dog (not calling him a dog) with his tail tucked in………LOL
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
2:53 pm
I remember how much it hurt, back in the day, to be automatically assumed to be “fast” because I was a girl, even though that could not have been farther from the truth. I always said if I had a girl I would never treat her that way and I don’t. I’m not naive, folks just give girls a bad rap coming out of the gate, while boys get a free pass. It stinks.
disco
December 14th, 2011
2:59 pm
kimmie – you sound like you really do remember the hurt. trust me – if there was something to give the sons I would have had my son on it too. as it is, I already had the poor kid wondering if he could get a vasectomy when he turned 18 and reverse it when he was ready. yep. he came up with that one all on his own.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
2:59 pm
Kimmie – I called my kid “fast” by her “omnish” (another old folks word) ways…being cute and probably more so “girlie” but I think she’s a pretty good kid. She’s lazy as heck but she’s a pretty good kid. The “tude” jumps up but hey that’s a part of it. I gives it to her straight. Sometimes she’ll say I was thinking about what you told me and just burst out laughing in class. I tell her about my shenanigans and what I didn’t know but what I know now and where (in that experience) she can learn and do different. She’s pretty attentive…hope she keeps chugging along.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
2:59 pm
kimmie – I don’t give little boys a free pass…they are all just as hormonal as the rap little girls get. But I guess it’s the double standard and how we’ve been programmed to think. Even I find myself thinking a bit biased when I see a little girl with a body like a grown women, with a grown woman’s walk. If it makes me do a double take, I can only imagine how the fast azz boys deal with it. lol
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
3:06 pm
Blackfoote – Pretty much…lol
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:07 pm
Me getting pregnant in high school was my mother’s biggest fear. She realized later down the road that she had nothing to worry about because I was nerd with a capital N, scared and insecure about my body and such, like a lot of teens. She had me so scared, I was terrified the first time I kissed a boy. I was 15. Graduated high school a virgin.
I just remember getting accused of even THINKING about doing something! I had long hair that I wore in a ponytail every day. One day in 9th grade I decided to wear it out. My mom saw me as I was leaving (my bus came usually before the rest of the fam got up) and went off, just sure I was trying to impress some boy!
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:11 pm
Slim – I developed early too, but my mom was good at camoflaging my body!LOL!! Had me under lock & key with the clothes, until my maturity level caught up with my body!
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
3:13 pm
kimmie – One thing I am most certain of is I NEVER had an issue with early development. Heyal, i’m still waiting on puberty to hit me now. I’m ready to trade in the training bra for at least a padded underwire
j/k
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:16 pm
Slim –
Years later I found out the boys in high school thought I was pretty, but they knew they were not getting ANYTHING here!! I hated high school! I had fun with my friends, but I was SO ready for college!!
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
3:22 pm
Boys should get a pass, girls shouldn’t….before ya’ll snap, boys lie to each other in the locker room about who they kissed, fugged, touched, or whatever, but most are virgins with capital V’s…until some fast ass lil girl opens them legs…if you can keep the girls in check, the boys will stay in place…you can always tell when a boy gets his first piece, he changes immediately and starts trying to assert his manhood.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
3:23 pm
My first time, I didn’t like it. And wasn’t that crazy about it for some years to come.
(Glad that changed…lol)
I was actually into my 20’s before I learned enough about my sexuality for it to become truly enjoyable.
So…my advice for delaying sex and encouraging abstinence for teens is more about learning self with a heavy dose of pregnancy prevention.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
3:24 pm
Well some boys take it these days…But i’m sure you’re going off the “norm” though
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:26 pm
SCool – Your 3:23, same here to be honest.
disco
December 14th, 2011
3:27 pm
jake – trust I agree with you. women definitely hold the cards in that arena. most little young girls don’t even know their power yet. still, even without knowing it, I know that there’s just as many girls out there looking to give it away as there are little boys out there looking to find it. thing is folks don’t necessarily want to own that about their daughters. you know that “my princess” mentality. still, some little girls are wide open (no pun intended).
Lord Velonese
December 14th, 2011
3:28 pm
I have had a gal introduce me as friend to her guy friends before, sucks, but you know thats what communication is for…..at least I thought. I don’t really get people anymore, don’t really care to sometimes.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
3:28 pm
if you can keep the girls in check, the boys will stay in place
If you can keep boys out of their ears and head…
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
3:29 pm
Slim? Take it, as in pressuring her to give in, or take it?
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:30 pm
disco – In talking to some of those grown women later, the ones that were wide open with it, usually it was a cry for help. Looking for love in all the wrong places. They were permiscuous because things were not right at home. Not saying that’s the case with all, but is with many.
It all still starts at home.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
3:32 pm
Blame the girls. Blame the boys.
Um, yeah…no…it is an individual choice where a girl or a boy responds to whatever pressure most directly and heavily influences them at that given moment.
Let us not fail to hold people personally responsible for their decisions/actions.
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
3:33 pm
Celisea, true, I remeber being in High School, talkin on the phone with “the Quiet Storm” on in the background sayin outlandish things to girls, one time in particular I told this girl that I wanted to put honey on her nipples and lick it off, hadn’t even seen a tit, (we were in 9th grade), I was mannish as hellz.
disco
December 14th, 2011
3:35 pm
celisea – re keeping boys out of their head. hmmm, I’m going to have to say it’s their job to try get in her head and it’s her job to regulate what she lets in her head. I’ll make allowances for youngsters but I’m totally annoyed by grown women who continue to blame men for what they do as opposed to blaming themselves for what they allowed men to do to them. I swear I could slap a chick every time she starts whining and singing that sob story. I figure the earlier a woman learns that the better her choices/decisions will be.
kimmie – I know and understand that point. my point was simply to point out that the boys are taking advantage of the opportunity and I won’t pass judgment on them for that. young boys (and a lot of grown men) really do think they can talk a girl/woman into giving it up but most girls/women have already made up their mind to do what they are going to do.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
3:36 pm
Oh…and one more thing regarding the topic – I do hope this reader addressed her “friend” about how his introduction “bothered” her.
If she feels as if she is unable to, that’s a problem. If you have been dating, staying over and acting like more than friends for several months, you should be able to address concerns if the relationship (or you) are in a healthy state.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
3:37 pm
Jake – Both
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
3:39 pm
You know Jake it’s a game that will never end. You have to get in with your kids ahead of the game getting them. It’s a really really fine line. If you ward them off from everything you’ll cause an imbalance. So there is much finesse and handling with care that must happen. I want my kid to experience love, the butterflies all of it but not at the expense of getting used a hundred times over. So it’s about starting with them, teaching them first and foremost self love and self preservation, learning to sharpen their senses because if you can get them off on the good foot the basics you hand them, they’ll learn to build off the seeds you planted.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:39 pm
disco – Fear works too, if they know the beatdown waiting at home!
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
3:43 pm
Jake – But how do yall learn how to talk like that at such an early age especially when the only ‘tail’ you’ve had were ox tails? lol I’m amazed by some of the things you hear these kids say.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:44 pm
Celisea – You are so right about that balance. While my mother had me scared to do anything, at the same time she really didn’t want to be TOO STRICT that it backfired. She wanted us to have a normal, happy healthy life. As a result I was able to participate in a lot of activities and had no curfew. She said she would put us on a curfew if we abused the priviledge.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
3:44 pm
As I catch up reading here I realize I thought the guys I went to school with were notorious liars…seems as if everybody was playing the game. good gals pretending bad, bad girls pretending good, and none of the guys doing a fraction of what they bragged about
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
3:44 pm
Slim-I agree with Disco with regard to it being the boys job to try and pressure her into giving in, but she is in control…as for straight taking it, lock his lil azz up.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
3:44 pm
Television/media/older male influences.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
3:45 pm
disco – Yes it is their job but it’s a battle keeping them out…that’s from being a “soft” woman and that’s from being a mother. Yes par for the course but for the selling of bs there should be an automatic deflector. And yes accountability should be in full effect but it’s gotta be instilled and packed down in them in order to deflect bullcrappery. Now if girls ain’t getting that rearing cause their mamas are still battling the same thing does that make it okay for the boys to have at it? Is it okay to say hell she should have known better or known to say know? Folks don’t know to do until you equip them with what they need. Everything ain’t about being hard and having a black or white answer. If you can’t see that or not willing to go the extra mile to get them there, you won’t understand their plight.
You and I are fortunate having grown up and being reared and rooted in common sense by (for me) my daddy first and foremost, brothers, uncles, cousins that hedged us and and schooled us until we got it. Had we not been that fortunate I don’t think for some things we would have been ahead of the game. And even in all the teaching some lessons we learned the hard way.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:45 pm
My mom was very frank about boys & such. First thing she taught me is not to believe all the sweet talk. Take it with a grain of salt!LOL!!
disco
December 14th, 2011
3:46 pm
amen to the fear comment. once I was discussing parenting with someone and I said fear was necessary. they told me they didn’t want their kids to fear them but only to respect them. I said respect goes a long way but fear will reel you in when respect is off taking a nap or something. I’m also fond of countering the phrase “don’t make a kid a promise you don’t plan to keep” with don’t threaten a kid if you have no plan to follow through.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:48 pm
none of the guys doing a fraction of what they bragged about
Randyt-
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
3:49 pm
RandyT-Yep, we all lie early on.
Celisea-Balance is key
Slim-Its as natural as breathing, of course you are influence by what you learn from watchin adults couples and TV, but really we are born that way. The change in voice tone, the lean in, the neck rub, the soft caress…I promise those things are innate!
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
3:50 pm
Exactly Kimmie – I tell my kid straight up. Sometimes it’s hard of her to hear and sometimes she just listens. And just to play devil’s advocate sometimes I’ll tell you this lil dude you call yourself liking is just waiting on you….that gets her everytime. Makes her buck back at him. Sometimes she thinks she knows and have all the answers but I just politely shut her down with what I already know. What I do like is she talks openly (I know not all) but I don’t in now way try to discourage. I need to always know (from what I already know) from what she don’t tell…”yeah just keeep right on talking”
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
3:51 pm
@ Kimmie…these supposed conquests were always from another school coincidentally LOL.
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
3:51 pm
@Celisea ~ now, that’s how my talk went as well. No marching him through the uncles, brothers and cousins.
O/T ~ Why, why, why do they have to have every known dessert known to man at the holiday function. Such gluttony (lol).
disco
December 14th, 2011
3:55 pm
well speaking of wayward youngsters – my nephew recently stole his mother’s car. kid has no license, no permit, no nothing. any of you guys ever steal your parents’ car?
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
3:56 pm
Randyt – Oh yeah, always at another school! Even green nerdy me used to talk about this “boyfriend” I had at another school!
Well, it wasn’t all a lie, I did go to the prom with this guy from another school. We liked each other, but he didn’t have the “label” and neither did I!LOL!!
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
3:57 pm
(raises hand…goes to sit in corner….)
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
3:58 pm
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
3:59 pm
Exactly Leggs….honestly I feel for a lot of the girls because they don’t have advocates and real mamas. I do. I was Church’s one day and I’m telling ya’ll (probably said here before) it broke my heat. There was the mama, the daughter and an aunt. The mama was dirty and stopped me and asked for money to buy food. So I asked who the dude was driving them and she said he was giving them a ride, that they’d been put out. So I walked back in Church’s with the two girls. The mama moved on begging from someone else and I turned to the girls to ask whose baby….one had a baby on her hip. So one said “mine” and looked ashamed. I asked her how old she was and she said 15. I asked the other girl who she was and she said her aunt….she was 16….generations of babies having babies. So I ordered a family meal and started talking to them. I told her you’re a mama now and you don’t and won’t have time to do a lot of what you think is ahead of you. I asked her you want to raise your baby? Then raise it. I said don’t have this baby to folks all over the place, don’t leave the baby with anybody. I told her you gotta grow up now because you have responsibilities. I asked if she was in school. I told her you’re going to have to pass a lot of what 15 year olds get to do but do it for your baby and you’ll be proud of yourself if you make it. I told her then help your mama. Now ask me who was their example. The mama was filthy, no bra….and asking anybody anybody. The baby though was clean, fine and well taken care of. I tried to tell her all I could think of to encourage her but I was stern and told her I’m serious. After about 10 minutes they both started saying “yes ma’am” I tell you that one got me. I told her about my hard road and that if you’re determined you can make it but you can’t be selfish. Told her no time for clubs, parties, good times….you gave it up when you got that baby.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
3:59 pm
@ disco…not me…that is why I am still alive, would have been the death penalty.
Sassy Me...Juicy Fruit ;-)
December 14th, 2011
4:01 pm
Why, why, why do they have to have every known dessert known to man at the holiday function.
It’s a set up!!! We had our holiday function today and there was a table entirely devoted to all types of sugary sweet, you don’t need it but you REALLY want it goodies and it was a true test…I tell ya. I will NOT gain any holiday weight…especially with my birthday coming next week. Soo not gonna happen.
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
4:02 pm
Since we are talking about it, you ever see the teenagers courting-the dude is always looking the girl directly in the eyes-(he naturally knows that this makes his bull seem true), she is usaully smiling her lil heart out and twitching her feet, ( she catchin them feelings, loves the thought that someone wants her that much)….Its nature, you can provide the guide, but you can’t stop that, nature is too powerful…
Just teach the girl to say “NO”, and hope that she values that innocence, cause he is not going to be givin those restraints, even when boys get “the talk”, its don’t bring any babies home, not don’t get that man wet.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
4:02 pm
Cel – You gone make me cry in the car.
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
4:02 pm
Celisea – That’s so sad. You were a blessing to all of them, though.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:03 pm
How come (yes how come) I’m flagging some of these emails in my yahoo addy as “spam” but they keep popping in my “in box”…
kimmie
December 14th, 2011
4:05 pm
Getting out of here now! Been fun gang!
Yall be easy!
disco
December 14th, 2011
4:05 pm
Randy – nephew’s mother had phoned police. my nephew had the nerve to phone my brother complaining that his mother called the police on him. my brother advised him that the police probably saved his life that night.
as for teen mothers – a lot of folks assume they are all hot tailed. some really did get caught up the first time out. experimenting is a bad boy hence why I said earlier, a child of mine would be on something. things happen.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:06 pm
SexyC and Kimmie – I teared up talking to them….my mom and kid and niece was in the car. My mom understood but my kid and niece was just looking shocked. My mama was smiling because she understood the feeling of wanting to know “better” is somewhere out there but when you start off live in the negative you gotta scratch and fight to get it. They didn’t have because they’re mama didn’t give to them.
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
4:07 pm
SCool- please tell me you not driving and blogging, we like you girl, concentrate!!
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
4:11 pm
I was too scared to try to steal anything, most definitely not a car.
Jake – Describing a dude putting that ‘talk’ work in is super funny. You ever notice when you get that feeling of being in the mood, your eyes close up just a bit? Your speech & tone changes? lol
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
4:12 pm
@Celisea ~ words of wisdom. Hopefully she holds onto your encouraging words. I HAD a friend who was always getting into fights with her then boyfriend. She had a very young daughter at the time. Between the fights and the constant moving I would council the young girl as much as I could. Always told her to make something of her life and get excellent grades because it will help her future. To this day I strongly believe that her witnessing the constant beatdowns, verbal abuse, moving all the time, helped mold her. She’s presently interning with President Obama!!!!!
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
4:12 pm
Jake – I’m sitting at my desk – the “cry in the car” reference is a line from the movie, Friday.
I’m always quoting dialogue. It’s a habit I’ve picked up from TheDude. Friday is one of the three movies that I quote most often. The other two are Coming to America and The Color Purple. (Honorable Mention – Love Jones)
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
4:14 pm
@Jake, I thought the same then figured she was the passenger.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:15 pm
Leggs – That’s fantab! I love to see women heck anybody overcome adversity
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
4:15 pm
@ Celisea re: “but when you start off live in the negative you gotta scratch and fight to get it”.
You got that right. My MBR at home is bigger than the trailer my whole family lived in until I was 12. First one in my family to ever graduate from HS, much less college. I knew that it would take luck and a lot of hardass work to get out…and it did. It takes 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration. Being smart always seems to work much better when you work your azz off for some reason.
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:16 pm
I loves Harpo God knows I do
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
4:17 pm
Hell, she at work…
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
4:17 pm
“You show is uuuugly.”
Cel – girl, don’t get me started. (lmao)
disco
December 14th, 2011
4:18 pm
I’ve never watched coming to America start to finish. I’ve tried. just never got into it. now love jones – dude hit a lick with “I’m the blues in your left eye, trying to be the funk in your right. is that alright?”
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:18 pm
SexyC – Girl, I hit refreshed and saw that comment and I’m on the phone…I had to muffle my laugh
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:19 pm
Randyt – It takes 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration
You got that right….I like that
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
4:20 pm
Slim-Its the truth, even as adults, its basically the same, except the woman’s feet isn’t what is twitching now, that thang is. Dude is still lookin at the lady straight in the eyeballs, waiting for her to give, when she says something like, ” oh really, you want to get to know me better”…….$$$$$$ gotcha
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
4:21 pm
“No…don’t save mine for later. Give me mine now.”
love jones…
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:24 pm
Ahhh, just you just love Love Jones??? I think when that movie came out on VHS I played it until there were lines across the screen.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
4:25 pm
Ain’t no you and me. You get gone and stay go.
“Pulp Fiction”
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
4:25 pm
“I love you, girl. And that…is urgent like a mphcka.”
more love jones…(lol)
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
4:25 pm
If we are quoting lines from moivies, one of my favorites is in “The Fugitive”. Harrison Ford says “I didn’t kill my wife” and Tommy Lee Jones replies, “I don’t care!”. I remember that sometimes when I deal with my bosses for some reason…and they are the Tommy Lee LOL.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
4:26 pm
“Falling in love is easy. Someone tell me how to stay there.”
love jones…
Fion
December 14th, 2011
4:26 pm
meant stay gone.
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
4:27 pm
Speaking of Love Jones, the best scene in the movie is when they both want it, can’t sleep, and he tips upstairs, and they cut to them dancing, its a real “moment” in the flick…anyway, carry on, can’t just be showing my Ralph Tresvant all willy nilly…lol
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
4:27 pm
One of the neat things on the internet is to google AFI’s 100 most memorable quotes from movies…like a stroll down memory Lane.
disco
December 14th, 2011
4:27 pm
another movie I love to quote – menace ii society. “you know you done effed up right” “that look like cain whooping your A the other night” – “man, MF cain”. I love it.
randy – the fugitive. tommy lee’s rant about searching every doghouse, outhouse, farmhouse….
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:28 pm
I like the first love scene…I think I was mezmerized
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
4:28 pm
disco – It’s THIGH not eye
disco
December 14th, 2011
4:28 pm
randy – imdb.com is addictive too (at least for me). I love re-watching the movie and trying to spot the goofs, etc.
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
4:29 pm
Any Resevior Dogs fans in here…
Celisea
December 14th, 2011
4:29 pm
Annnnnnnnnnnd I cooked Sundy, leftovers Monday, cooked Tuesday. The kitchen is closed today.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
4:29 pm
yeah disco, Tommy Lee Jones is something like Jack Nicholson in that you strongly suspect that in every movie he is playing himself.
disco
December 14th, 2011
4:31 pm
slim – you are right but it must have felt right when I was typing it (again, no pun intended). I’d smile back but I don’t know how.
Randyt (I am so bored I'm thinking about conjugating the word "bore")
December 14th, 2011
4:31 pm
Well folks, in the unlikely event that anyone anywhere cares, I’m heading out. Night y’all.
Fion
December 14th, 2011
4:35 pm
Mr.Blue, Mr.Brown, Mr. Pink “why I got to be Pink. How come he can’t be Pink.
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
4:37 pm
@disco ~ I liked the doghouse, outhouse, farmhouse comment my self. That one tickled me.
Can’t quote this directly, but loved Jason’s Lyrics when he said “I’ll sit in the back of the church just to be near you.” That entire scene makes me tear up!
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
4:39 pm
disco – It’s all good. I fall in love with that movie every time I see him perform that poem. Being that I write a little myself, the best way to get me going is in between my ears
Jake a.k.a. SPJ, TWB
December 14th, 2011
4:39 pm
“You Bark all night little doggie, or you gonna bite”
“Excuse, me, I didn’t quite catch that”…lol
disco
December 14th, 2011
4:44 pm
leggs – that one in jason’s lyric was when he was saying “I got a job. I sell tvs. sold you one as a matter of fact…. I eat fried chicken every day cause my momma work at frenchy’s”.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
4:48 pm
I’m sorry but any time I hear “Frenchy or Frenchy’s” I think of ole dude from In Living Color.
SlimNu
December 14th, 2011
4:49 pm
http://www.hulu.com/watch/4981/in-living-color-frenchie-and-a-classy-party
Leggs
December 14th, 2011
5:00 pm
Ummmm…..ok, disco. I thought it was the scene when he’s outside her house telling her how much he basically adores her (lol).
SexyCool
December 14th, 2011
5:17 pm
The lovemaking scene in Jason’s Lyric is crazy sexy, almost erotic.
The picnic on the bridge just makes me sigh.