May I have your attention, please?
Sometimes the dating scene can be like sliding doors. We are constantly passing one another, rarely slowing down long enough to connect. What does it take to get the attention of someone you like? How do you get the “right” kind of attention?
When you don’t have a lot of confidence, it isn’t always easy to get the attention of someone you are interested in. If you are shy, especially a shy woman, it’s particularly difficult to stand out from the crowd. What get a man’s attention?
Ladies, what turns your head and get’s you interested?
When was the last time someone got your attention and made you take notice? What did they say or do to make you perk up?
Happy Friday!
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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248 comments Add your comment
disco
November 18th, 2011
11:08 am
sniffer – I was in one of those little towns that only have one high school if that’s any indication. actually as numbers go there was a really good turnout of men. usually when out the main complaint is that there are not enough men. still none of them did anything for me. there wasn’t anyone in the spot that made me think “ooh I want to go talk to him”.
kym – play nice. we won’t say they don’t have swag, we’ll just say they’ve got their own kind of swag. goodness knows that there are plenty of folks out there that are confident while we look at them and wonder how the heck they got to be confident. you know what I’m talking about. some folks be looking a hot mess but you can’t tell them nothing.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
11:15 am
disco are you near the shore line?
CoolShadow
November 18th, 2011
11:15 am
One of the most flattering things a woman can do to a man is when she acknowledges that he has caught her attention especially when it’s from a random stranger, unsolicited and unexpected without props and staging. I’ve been blindsided a couple of times and then wondered what was I doing right for that to happen?
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
11:24 am
CoolShadow:
That is a good feeling when a lady acknowledge and stand her ground with you in conversation. Don’t have to mean anything or go anywhere, just the mere notion she doesn’t feel threaten instead she feels comfortable and that keeps my attention level high.
disco
November 18th, 2011
11:29 am
I just discovered that I left my chapstick in the car. dang it. I had to put on gloss.
cool shadow – back when I was still clubbing and whatnot my fail proof pick up was to walk over to guy who was likely chilling with one or more pals. I’d step up, excuse myself for interrupting, lean in and say something like “I don’t want to interrupt you guys but if you’d like to dance/have a drink/chat a bit later, I’ll be sitting over there” and indicate where I’m sitting. it was short, sweet and to the point. it was easy, not much fear of rejection because I said what I said and then went on about my way. if he followed me cool, if not it’s one for the game. still, almost every single time dude would eventually make his way to where I was and ask me to dance or offer to buy a drink.
did everyone else leave?
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
11:32 am
@ Kym…I haven’t read it but I’ve got the book at home to start soon.
Everyone says the entire series is great though. Apparently a bit strong…I like that. Nicholas Sparks type books are a little too smaltzy for my taste.
Into the Light
November 18th, 2011
11:37 am
Kym/Randy: I’ve heard that, too. I don’t know why I haven’t started it yet. Maybe during the holidays….
I’ll also be starting the Game of Thrones series of books. LOVE the show.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
11:39 am
disco:
I like that move, it’s happened to me on a few occassions. Men like that I think you already know.
For Real
November 18th, 2011
11:40 am
What Blog Fam!
What get a man’s attention? –
1. Well groomed (if you got weave the world shouldn’t know it)
2. Facial expression (Mean mugging ain’t cute)
3. Clothes (Dress age, height and weight appropriate)
4. Body language (Standing on one leg with your arm crossed you should have stayed home)
5. No Freaky Jason Eyes
6. Not loud (hearing you before I see you ain’t cute and no I don’t want to hear your cellphone convo)
7. Manners (chewing while you talk… loud at that)
Into the Light
November 18th, 2011
11:42 am
5. No Freaky Jason Eyes
What are “freaky Jason eyes”???
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
11:42 am
@ Leggs re: the Adele song…I think the line that hits me most is the line that I suspect most of us have said to ourselves before, “guess (he)she gave you things I didn’t give you”… BTDTGTTS !
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
11:45 am
disco my hometown have one high school too! lol you bring back memories!!! lol
CoolShadow
November 18th, 2011
11:50 am
Blackfoote: that’s actually what happened to me; she approached and complimented me, I thanked her and she kept moving and I kept cheesing that day.
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
11:52 am
@Randyt ~ interesting you say that line, because every time I hear it, I think she’s talking about sex before marriage (not sure why), but that’s what I think.
disco
November 18th, 2011
11:56 am
i don’t think that move is overly bold or brazen but I know tons of chicks who would never do it. my friends are usually all OMG when I tell them to watch me work. I’m like a closed mouth don’t get fed and while technically it’s initiating the object is to get his attention and pull back and let him do what he do.
cool shadow – not that you were cheesing all day on a compliment. either it was one heck of a compliment OR you don’t get complimented that often OR that person was kind of hot.
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
11:58 am
@disco ~ even if you get compliments often, one special one can have you cheesing all day.
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
11:59 am
@disco ~ I can definitely see me doing that move. I’m pretty bold.
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
11:59 am
@ Leggs…It could be interpreted that way for sure. Isn’t that about the first question we ask when a relationship tanks…”weren’t we could enough under the sheets?” I guess it brings up to me the old “what does/did he/she have that I don’t?” question. Men are very competitive in romance and war. When we don’t win, we want to know what it took to beat us…even if we are grateful inside.
disco
November 18th, 2011
12:00 pm
leggs – my point exactly. “or that person was hot” is akin to that one special compliment.
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
12:00 pm
good not could, sorry
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
12:01 pm
In case any of you want to see Heavy D’s funeral (live):
http://www.birthplacemag.com/2011/11/heavy-d-funeral-streaming-live-live-video/
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:02 pm
once I got a guys attention was just harmless convo….an inquiry @ best……and from there we conversed for a while and turned out there was an attraction beyond the surface stuff…….He said he had no clue I liked him from afar………we are still good friends…..
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:04 pm
Thanks Leggs!
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
12:04 pm
Off topic…my boss is out, his boss is out, I’m near the door and taking next week off. So the question is, does Randy do “The Great Escape” ???. I’m so bored that I looked on Match under the category of ‘Women seeking Women’ to see what the other team auditioning for the “L Word” looks like…was impressed.
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
12:05 pm
@Randyt ~ no, that’s not the first question I would ask if my relationship tanked (LOLOLOL).
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:06 pm
Randy hot mess lol
Kym
November 18th, 2011
12:06 pm
@disco..you are right..I am bold in everyday convo..but I am not about to walk up and approach a guy like that at all. My friends say I am completely cluesless in the flirting dept. I guess so..just not my thang at all.
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
12:06 pm
OOPs Leggs…guess that is a man’s perspective
Into the Light
November 18th, 2011
12:07 pm
Must be nice to be able to leave early today. I’ll be lucky if I get out on time.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
12:08 pm
I’m sure there are a lot of women who want to do it but feel it should be left up to the man. It lightens the load a bit on our end, I have no problem with it either way.
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
12:08 pm
I’m off all of next week…so looking forward to not waking up with an alarm going off. Can get all my items for Thanksgiving on Monday without fighting a crowd.
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
12:08 pm
@ Leggs…you’d have to ask if the dude has a ride home or if his Mommy is looking for him based on your recent blogs (just playin wit ya
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
12:09 pm
Good one, Randyt!
disco
November 18th, 2011
12:14 pm
kym – that’s just it. I don’t think I’ve got any flirting skills whatsoever. i have zero talent when it comes to flirting on the fly. now in an “out” situation I feel I’m at an advantage. 1st advantage is I know I look good because I wouldn’t step out otherwise. 2nd advantage – guys really do get a kick out of being approached. 3rd advantage – they get to watch you walk away and trust me when I say he and his boys will be watching you walk away. my backside is an asset and I know it but I guess that part could be a disadvantage to some.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
12:22 pm
Whew watch out there, yes we will be watching (that backside) and commenting.
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:25 pm
physical creatures you are sir….lol its so funny to make eye contact with the watcher…….
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
12:30 pm
@Lady ~ Its even funnier watching the watcher watching someone else and then you two make eye contact…
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
12:31 pm
LOL
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:32 pm
that one is classic leggs and it happens often…..people watching is amusing almost a hobby for me….lol
Leggs
November 18th, 2011
12:34 pm
I love it too, Lady! Great laughs.
disco
November 18th, 2011
12:35 pm
I’m having one of those ally mcbeal moments I mentioned yesterday. trick.
Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)
November 18th, 2011
12:35 pm
As a gentleman, I feel obligated to avert mey eyes (if the backside looks like sunset over the Taj Mahal that is).
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:37 pm
smh lol that goes both ways……I have been approached by monsters but I remain a lady and dismiss kindly……lol
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:37 pm
physical attraction is key………
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
12:39 pm
How about the one you can feel their eyes on you and when you look back at them they turn their head around like they wasn’t looking at you. Too funny.
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:41 pm
yep those I keep my distance too it almost a turn off…..its easier when both parties connect and laugh it off…its a impromptu ice breaker I think….harmless flirting
Audra
November 18th, 2011
12:41 pm
Seriously, swagger? OMG. You can have all the swagger you want, but if you’re a azz is rude, lazy, stoopid, etc., then swagger ain’t gonna get it! I see a lot of dudes with swagger and you know what? The ones who have it all together don’t need it. Women just know…
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:42 pm
but why deny the connection by turning away……I know rejection is just that but risk taking is cool too
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
November 18th, 2011
12:42 pm
Monsters……..LOL I’ll bet you do Lady.
Lady~
November 18th, 2011
12:43 pm
must admit I am a natural flirt an honest Leo who loves the center of attention and entertaining….not loud or controlling the scene it happens naturally…..out of the 9 years here in Atlanta I’ve connected with friends of friends on my personality alone…….I just love people!