Dating: Should the chase be easy?
I read somewhere that some men actually enjoy “the chase” part of dating. When they find someone that intrigues them, they have the stamina to go the distance and do a little work to make things happen. I don’t know if that is true of most men in Atlanta. A lot of single women here will tell you that the guys they meet want it to be easy. Should the chase be easy?
Perhaps all it takes is the right people, under the right circumstances to make the chase enjoyable for both. It seems as if there would have to be a good balance of showing enough interest and being available, as opposed to playing hard to get all the time.
The trick is figuring out if you are both on the same page. I have to be honest, here. I don’t think a lot women really know when they meet a guy if he is the type that likes to put in a little work.
What do you think? If men are into the chase, how far are they willing to go? What is a reasonable amount of work and what is not?
Do men really want women who are “easy” to get or can they appreciate the woman who has made it clear she is not the easy to get type?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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407 comments Add your comment
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:47 pm
I’m getting out of this mug today.
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
4:47 pm
I disagree, Leggs. A hoodrat, dense, ugly chick could cause him all kind of problems just cause she pissed that he doesn’t want her.
So, because he’s tolerating and being nice to her, he is encouraging her?
Yeah…me and TheDude had this issue. We had to agree to disagree.
JustMe, Slim
October 27th, 2011
4:47 pm
He had to have at least rubbed on the boobies or that booty…I don’t even want to think he let his “fingers do the walking” in the company copy room while no one was looking.
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:48 pm
He had to have at least rubbed on the boobies or that booty…I don’t even want to think he let his “fingers do the walking” in the company copy room while no one was looking.
Or something. She ain’t hanging to and for nothing…tell it men lie women lie. You know the blog women will hammer a situation until the truth surface.
Of course not today for me I’m getting out of here…I’m tired
Exiled!
October 27th, 2011
4:49 pm
Or gave her mixed mssages.
Initially seemingly interested
Then backed off
I tell ya,pudy on a platter, when u don’t like it, is as foul and bad as seemingly nice food on a platter when your belly is full.
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:49 pm
We could have had it allllll, rolling in the deeeeeep
Into the Light
October 27th, 2011
4:50 pm
It could be, too, that it’s a game to her….seeing what (if anything) will happen or how much he will take.
MLWL: Does this only occur at work, or is she contacting you outside work/on the weekends, etc?
men lie, women lie
October 27th, 2011
4:50 pm
I didn’t hit, tap, dry hump, bust, nothing with this chic, I don’t know why she would like me like that.
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:50 pm
I tell ya,pudy on a platter, when u don’t like it, is as foul and bad as seemingly nice food on a platter when your belly is full.
LOLOLOL….as crass as it sounds that’s a truism right that…LOLOLOL
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:52 pm
ITL – It could be, too, that it’s a game to her….seeing what (if anything) will happen or how much he will take.
After 8 or 9 years??? Naw that’s too much work and time all for nothing. There’s either some incentive or been incentive somewhere…tell it men lie women lie. It’s the end of the day and we’re (well I am) just cutting up
men lie, women lie
October 27th, 2011
4:53 pm
Ok to answer the recurring questions, she doesn’t have my number nor have she seen me outside of work,
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
4:54 pm
Maybe, initially, he was just being a nice co-worker, friendly, slightly flirty and she took it the wrong way, took it too far….and won’t let it go.
This stuff happens. I have had to say to past co-workers. “Hey, buddy. You take sht too far. So, let’s just don’t go there at all.” But I’m a chick. I can say that to a dude with little fear of retribution. Most times, all a female has to do is make a claim, with no basis and that’s all she wrote.
Exiled!
October 27th, 2011
4:54 pm
Cel!
I had to close with that one coz Kimmie said I hit all the sweet spots today!
And Slim too
Gd nite!
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:54 pm
So contact is limited to work. You never felt her up, brushed up against her, gave her the look, nice towards her, courteous? Nothing? Mystery indeed
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:55 pm
Yes MMeello, you was on post today…and not too crass I might add
men lie, women lie
October 27th, 2011
4:55 pm
@ Celisea
thats why I asking ya’ll cause I would understand this if I did,
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:55 pm
point not post…
Into the Light
October 27th, 2011
4:56 pm
Okay, MLWL, so my next question would be how are you defining harrassment? You said she’s been harassing you for 8 or 9 years, but you only gave one example of her saying, “Well, if we were together”….
men lie, women lie
October 27th, 2011
4:57 pm
@ SexyCool correct on that last post,
Leggs
October 27th, 2011
4:57 pm
They sang that song at the talent show, Celisea.
@SexyC ~ if he hasn’t told her she’s bothering him, yes, he’s encouraging her. I understand placating one to quell, things, but 8 years later and he’s never told her she’s been inappropriate, I’m siding with silent encouragement.
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
4:57 pm
Okay…now, I gotta mess with MLWL – “Hmmmmm….booooyyyyy…you MUST be sexy than a mphcka, got this chick on you for damn near a DECADE????WHAT?!?!?”
(lmao)
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:57 pm
No I’m only kidding men lie women lie. Yeah I think what SexyC said could be a possible. Fear for lack of a better term in getting things turned upside down and misconstrued. That happens easily.
I’m stumped because no way am I hanging on and there’s not even a flicker. I mean one can hold out for hope if there’s some incentive, reason, hint of something. But nothing? Naw I’m moving on even if I don’t want to.
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
4:59 pm
And reading ITL, if I may take it further….ARE YOU DELUSIONAL? Are you misreading and she’s just a coworker minding her business and you’re reading waaay too much into “nothing?”
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
5:00 pm
I just want to point to the operative word that MLWL used in his description of chick – HOOD.
Y’all know hood ain’t got a bit of damn sense.
i'm swiss™
October 27th, 2011
5:00 pm
Slim — Just like a woman. Always wanting to be chased… I guess it’s not enough that I shaved my ballz for you, huh?
JustMe, Slim
October 27th, 2011
5:00 pm
I’m tired, so i’m out…. Drops the mic but trips on the cord on the way out Yall didn’t see that
PEACE
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:00 pm
Maybe you thought she was looking at your crouch (excuse me for those sensitive and will call me trash tomorrow…lol) when really she was daydreaming about how she’s going to wear her braids or get her bills paid or thinking about the dude that sits next to you? Just saying…men lie women lie…men misinterpret women misinterpret…lol
Leggs
October 27th, 2011
5:01 pm
ball….
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:02 pm
LOL – Leggs…you would…LOL
Into the Light
October 27th, 2011
5:02 pm
LOL@Celisea. I think SCool hit the mark. Sounds to me like a friendly flirtation that went too far.
men lie, women lie
October 27th, 2011
5:02 pm
@Into the Light
she’ll flick her tounge ring at me, she left pound cake on my desk(but my birthday was like six months ago,she tried to show me her snatch during a meeting on time, she gripped my a$$ which made me feel like I lost my man card, she’ll walk by my office bout 47 time in a hour, just to name a few
Leggs
October 27th, 2011
5:03 pm
It was right there, Celisea (LOL).
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
5:03 pm
Correction – retaliation, not retribution.
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:04 pm
C’mon men lie women lie, that’s it…let it alllll out. I did laugh out loud though at your 5:02…I can hear you tembling as you type
Leggs
October 27th, 2011
5:04 pm
@MLWL ~ I had a guy here that would lick the air when I walked by. You best believe I handled him right then and there. No freaking years were going to pass by with me enduring crap like that.
MLWL is Lying……
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
5:04 pm
Damn, MLWL – I feel violated FOR you. Hell naw. I would have to pull her to the side for foolishness to that level.
You need to report her ass.
Leggs
October 27th, 2011
5:05 pm
@Celisea ~ it’s a cute running joke, but I’m going to leave it alone going forward.
Into the Light
October 27th, 2011
5:05 pm
Whoa! That chick needs an intervention….
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
5:05 pm
Sounds like a Romeo/Coretta (The Steve Harvey Show) relationship.
Are you a compact man? Is she a big o woman?
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:05 pm
MLWL – You let it go on too long and go too far. The first time Idda called her on it.
i'm swiss™
October 27th, 2011
5:07 pm
Leggs —
Hey, that just makes it that much more effort. You try shaving the unoccupied side of the sack without getting cut. It’s not easy… 
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:07 pm
Leggs – it’s a cute running joke, but I’m going to leave it alone going forward.
Yeah, he tried to slip a “z” up in there….we know the deal…LOL
SexyC -Sounds like a Romeo/Coretta (The Steve Harvey Show) relationship.
Yep…LOLOL
men lie, women lie
October 27th, 2011
5:07 pm
I’m serious at first I felt it would go away but it lingered, but like someone said it’s kinda different when your a guy
Leggs
October 27th, 2011
5:07 pm
No way all of that is going on…no way. He’s coming across as Moist and scared of this hoodrat.
I’m calling you to the center of the room MLWL. DGo get your man card and tell this chick she has to stop (that is if she’s really doing all of this)…Here’s a rag for the moistness dripping from your forehead.
Into the Light
October 27th, 2011
5:08 pm
Oh law….we’ve gone from whiners to harassers to uniball today. Have mercy.
SexyCool
October 27th, 2011
5:08 pm
MLWL – feel ya’, dude. Damn….
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:10 pm
MLWL – Maybe if in a nice slick way (cause I believe you can get it done with no backlash), tell her just how low (and ya’ll know I’m not one for belittling women) and trashy she is and that you’ll never even dust her cause her behavior is not what you associate with. I mean that’s the gist but hit below the belt and in a way that can’t be traced….or
Report her….have your ducks in a row though because that’s a difficult thing to do when it comes to men.
Leggs
October 27th, 2011
5:11 pm
@Celisea ~ now, going that route will really have her ante up her game and make matters more miserable for him. Hood perfected the game of payback!!!
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:12 pm
Naw MLWL, if what you saying is the total truth…and no details left out, that ain’t right. If she’s doing sneak-a-peek of the snatch she’s nasty. Yeah, I can see “hoodrat.” Good luck dude.
I hope you come back. I think I’ve seen you here a couple of times. Join the gang. This group can be therauptic
Celisea
October 27th, 2011
5:14 pm
Yeah Leggs. I’d get here away from there and lay it on her. She wouldn’t misunderstand nothing after that. It’s a way he can do it without tripping himself. Just got to be smart about it.