accessAtlanta

City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

My first love

I found some old journals from high school recently and reading through it made me nostalgic. Everything back then was sooo dramatic and huge. The first person you thought you were in love with was the only person in the world for you. Ahh, to be young and foolish again.

I thought about how the first love of your life can sometimes set a precedent for future relationships. Sometimes we realize who is no good for us, sometimes we are too naive to know it until much, much later.

What do you think your first love taught you about relationships? Do you remember the first time you fell head over heels in love?

Have you ever wondered what happened to them? Is it ever a good idea to go look them up and see how they are doing?

Happy Friday!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

225 comments Add your comment

Milles

October 14th, 2011
6:41 am

I was 13 years old when I fell in love with a guy named Paul McCartney! He was new to the United States and every day I couldn’t wait to hear his voice or see his face! I just knew he would marry me if only he knew how dedicated I would be toward our happiness. He had a girlfriend at the time, but I was steadfast in my love for him. He was so incredibly cute, and had a killer smile. My first name is Linda and in class I would write his name and mine all over my notebooks: “Linda & Paul McCartney”, it sounded lovely. And he did marry a Linda, but it wasn’t me. I felt sad, but continued to love the sound of his voice and his music. I still do! He just remarried last week, but it wasn’t me again. I wish him much happiness and peace.
I found my true love when I was 18. We have been together since 1968! His name is not Paul, but he loves me and I love him so!
” A love like ours could never die as long as I have you near me.”

CmonSeriously

October 14th, 2011
7:04 am

I remember her very well, I learned that you should never wait for someone, if they are with someone else and you don’t want to break it up, and be the bad guy, move on. Saw her a few months ago, she is married now, and weighs about 300 lbs. Got to have her once, that was enough. Now I move on without really a second thought, if you have to wait for someone else, then you are just cheating yourself out of your own happiness.

Larry

October 14th, 2011
7:06 am

I remember my first love very vividly as we fell in and out of each others lives for several years, each time we reunited it was with the same passion that we had from the beginning. She moved to the Atlanta area and I moved on, 20 years after we last were together I also moved to the Atlanta area and our paths crossed once again, we were both married but that didn’t keep us from once again rekindling our passion for one another, sadly we returned to our spouses and have never been together since. Had we not both been married to others I believe we would both be together today, I divorced, she remained married, I do regret the infedlity but not the relationship.

wilson

October 14th, 2011
7:10 am

I remember one or two. Facebook has changed this game. You can stalk them on there pretty easily, without having to look them up and hold the awkward conversation wherein nobody really has anything to say.

greader17

October 14th, 2011
7:48 am

My first love was during parochial elementary school, 5th grade, Jaques was his name. He was french-canadian from somewhere in upper Canada, and I was african-american from the projects of Detroit, but I don’t think we even knew or cared that some would consider that an issue. He was tall and gangley, with the largest nose I had ever seen on a human being, and had a propensity to spit on you when in an animated conversation, I was fat, could not see very well and had very low self-esteem, but we where both nerds. And he was the very first person I had met who loved to read as much as I did. He bought a ring from a bubble gum machine, made this big presentation with it, I proudly walked home, showing everyone. When my mom saw it, she proudly walked me to school the next day and gave it back to him. I believe our ardor was cooled after that, between the nuns and my mom it didn’t have a chance anyway. He left our St. Dominic’s a couple of weeks later, some say he moved back to Canada. I never saw him again. I wonder what happened to him?

Kym

October 14th, 2011
7:51 am

Good Morning All,

Awww first love..well lets see I have had contact with first crush, first time, and first love all in this past year thanks to Facebook. What has it taught me? That I have got to learn to pick better(read into that what you will) But I would be lying if I didn’t say I felt those fellows set a precedent for past relationship choices. Again got to learn to pick better. Being in “deep serious like”(cause it ain’t love) can really blind you to what is right there in your face. He not crazy..just a bit silly..if I could turn back time and tell teenage Kym anything it would be…”RUN GAL..RUN”

Long Time Ago

October 14th, 2011
7:52 am

Every now and then I think of her – watching a movie, hearing some music, etc. It’s been over 30 years since we last saw each other at a wedding for mutual friends. Gave each other a hug and wished each other a good life and moved on. We dated for three years and had some really good times, but, realized our future plans really didn’t include the other. Sometimes when I’m visiting my home town I watch the crowd. It would be nice to see her, but, have no interest in rekindling anything. Also, no interest in FB friending her.

Figment

October 14th, 2011
8:01 am

My first love was unrequited, back when I was about 19 years old or so. I wrote him a letter quite a few years ago just trying to see how he was doing but never heard a word. That’s OK though, I don’t miss those days.

Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)

October 14th, 2011
8:02 am

I think,I may still be waiting for mine ;-) This is actually kind of a tough subject for me, because the memories seem to always center around the end of the relationships…the last days and hours. Is it too early for Makers Mark, LOL.

Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)

October 14th, 2011
8:07 am

On a brighter note, my first crush was when I was a sophomore in high school, Debbie M., this really cute freshman. One day my cousin (from another school) and I were playing on a Quija Board. He asked it who I was in love with. That dayum thing spelled out her first name and was halfway thru her last name when I knocked the piece off the table. No way my cousin could have known. Crazy. One of those things one never understands,

Mter

October 14th, 2011
8:29 am

My first love goes back to the 10th grade and just celebrated my 50th high school reunion. This was a short but very intense love. He called me at my mother’s house 12 years after graduation when he thought I would be there due to a death in my family and then again at my grandmother’s house a few months later for a similar reason. I saw him once in the 80s and then spoke over the phone a couple of times since. Before our reunion this year I had a tremendous urge (which had not been there in the past) but knew I just had to get in touch with him. It was like I was in a panic to contact him, could not understand why. Called where he used to work, was told he retired, thought he had lost his home to foreclosure, called his old number, then even hired a detective to try and get numbers for me. Only when I went to the reunion did I find out he was very sick with cancer. I just had to let him know, in round about manner, what he had meant to me in my life. I spent the few days of my reunion time calling his family, got his residence and telephone numbers from them and finally was able to go by and visit with him and his wife and out of ear shot from the wife told him he always had a piece of my heart. He said he knew. I might have said my goodbys but if I had not been able to contact probably could not have lived with myself.

DB

October 14th, 2011
8:36 am

Ah, first love! Head over heels, lost in a haze of hormones! In high school, I was sure I was “in love”, and would completely miss whatever the 4th period teacher was saying because I was soooo focused on watching the door to see if the object of my obsession would walk past on his way to lunch (his locker was right outside the door). What I learned from that relationship: Don’t ever let anyone take you for granted! I broke up with him six months after I started college (much to his mother’s dismay). We saw each other again six years later, when I was engaged and a few months before I was married. Nice guy, but by then, I had learned the difference between lust and love :-) He contacted me on Classmates a year or so ago, 29 years after the last time I saw him — just a nice note, no suggestion of meeting, etc. — I sent a nice note back, and that was that.

Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)

October 14th, 2011
8:39 am

My first true love/girlfriend was when I was 17 and she was 16. I left for college a few months later and when I returned the first time (won enough in a poker game to catch a plane home) , I proposed. She said yes, but a month later went out with a guy who had just returned from Nam. He got her drunk, took her virginity (something I had naively respected), and we broke up, She decided he was what she needed. Last I heard, a couple of years later, she had gotten married (not to that guy), had a son with disabilities, and was living in the next town.

Probably still need to talk to a therapist about my abandonment issues that started then ;-)

Jessica

October 14th, 2011
8:40 am

Mine was in 8th grade in Louisiana. He had the most beautiful smile. We “dated” only a short while. In 8th grade, “dating” meant sitting at the lunch table together, walking home from school together and talking on the phone. We remained friends throughout high school and I hadn’t seen him since I left for college. Just recently, I ran into some close friends of his and they told me he was happily married, living in Texas and doing well. I wish him, his wife, his children nothing but the BEST because he is the epitome of a good person. Every since I met him, I have LOVED men with beautiful smiles and white teeth. He set that precedent.

Jewels

October 14th, 2011
8:46 am

My first love was so special. It was at 17, you know when you are young and dumb. When think the word of that person. When nothing they could do was wrong you hung on their every word. And then something happens and pop the fantasy bubble bursts and reality creeps in. He was a great guy. I decided to look him up on FB a couple years back and it’s amazing how all those feelings of love/hate come running back to you all at once. He is still a great guy but not for me for someone else. But man to be 17 again!

Atltwen

October 14th, 2011
8:50 am

@ Jewels — my first love was named “Jewel!”

DeeNice

October 14th, 2011
8:51 am

My first love I saw on a church trip to Disney World. I was 15 years old and he was a friend of my cousins. They introduced us and we were together for years. We graduated from high school and took different paths. 20 years later he found me on Facebook. We are both divorced and starting over with each other. The passion is still there and I feel like that 15 year old girl again! I do realize that I compared every guy to him and no one ever measured up. He’s simply beautiful and I am excited he is back in my life.

clipper

October 14th, 2011
8:52 am

Yep, I remember. She was a real doll, very popular, and I was not very cool with the girls. I was an 18 year old nerd type, she was a pretty savvy 16 year old. Only time I could cop a date was when she didn’t have one. Needless to say, the romance was one sided.

Located her 40 years later. Now a widow (her husband died from alcoholism), and in poor health. I eventually found the love of my life and we’ve been happily married 37 years, two fine sons and two fabulous granddaughters. We never know what life holds for us.

Jessica

October 14th, 2011
8:53 am

Oh! I forgot to mention that I was in love in 6th grade with my home room teacher. He was the first male teacher I’d ever had. At that time, he seemed so tall, so good looking. In an effort to impress him, I made all A’s in his class. He knew I had a serious crush on him but thank God he was a man in great integrity and didn’t do what some teachers now do – seduce the student. The most he ever done was give me verbal motivation to keep making A’s and in his words, “ready everything you can get your hands on”. After 6th grade, I went to Middle School and didn’t see my teacher again until I was an adult. I am 5′3 and realize I am just as tall as he is. So funny because in 6th grade he seemed so much taller!!

Susan

October 14th, 2011
8:53 am

I remember him more than anything else in my life. I was 14, he was 16 and we had our first dates ever with each other at a high school football fame. We attended rival high schools so only saw each other outside of school activities. As the years passed we continued to date, and neither of us ever dated anyone else. Now, 49 years after that beautiful fall evening in 1962 he is sitting across the table from me, finishing his breakfast as I type this note. The early passion of our teenage years has turned into a lifetime of raising children, building homes, making careers, welcoming grandchildren and helping parents as they aged and we have given up 3 of them. I would never be the person I am today without my best friend and constant companion. I didn’t have a clue what I was doing when I accepted that first date but sure am glad the fates worked in our favor. We’re off today on a jaunt in ouir community- a little shopping, a little looking, a lot of laughing. One more day of making our way through life with each other. It doesn’t get much better than this.

Leggs

October 14th, 2011
8:56 am

Good morning! HAPPY FRIDAY

What do you think your first love taught you about relationships? – To not associate ever again with young boys who only wanted to hang out on the stoop. I really liked him and remember his scent and his brown eyes to this day.

Do you remember the first time you fell head over heels in love? To be honest, I’ve been in love one time. Gave my all and it wasn’t enough. Been in deep like/in the throes of lust of many times.

@Cmon ~ ummmm, people you want are wanting to be with other people. Seems like you’re no picking the right person….you time will come when you will find that ONE!

Have you ever wondered what happened to them? I’ve only wondered if he’s still alive.

Is it ever a good idea to go look them up and see how they are doing? Naw, I realized early on the path he may have taken.

Studly Hungwell

October 14th, 2011
8:57 am

I’m still married to my first love, 19 years and counting!

Leggs

October 14th, 2011
8:59 am

What a beautiful read, Susan!

Leggs

October 14th, 2011
9:01 am

18, found her 40 years later and have been married now 37 years?????

CmonSeriously

October 14th, 2011
9:05 am

We were on swim team together back in highschool and she was with a friend of mine, so we could not do anything, but late at night on the way back from every away swim meet, we cuddle up in the back of the bus, both of us keeping warm under her parka, and she would fall asleep in my arms. She was my best friend, and she felt the same way about me, but didn’t think I thought the same about her, so she stayed with her boyfriend, I should have said something, and didn’t, I stayed friends with her for years, it was only on valentines day the week before I left town for oklahoma that we expressed how we really felt.

Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)

October 14th, 2011
9:06 am

@ Leggs…re: “To not associate ever again with young boys who only wanted to hang out on the stoop. I really liked him and remember his scent and his brown eyes to this day”.

This REALLY sounds like the Boy Toy ;-)

JustMe, Slim

October 14th, 2011
9:14 am

Yeah yeah yeah, it’s Friday…it’s Friday every week around this time but thanks for the reminder though

1st so-called love was in high school…we were inseperable…and it was probably a bit sickening to those around us. But once I went off to college, he chose to stay home and figure out what he wanted to do with himself, it killed some of the attraction to him. We started to grow apart. We chat every once in a Green moon but there are no issues or hard feelings between us. I’ve told yall this before but he only dates white chicks now. Nor do I pine over him wondering what could’ve been. The boyfriend I had in college probably had me a lot more wide open as far as “head over heels’…we had known each other since 8th grade and ran into each other on campus. We always flirted in HS but he always had a gf or whatever so nothing ever transpired. Anyway, he tapped into my mind, got me to see the world in a different light, taught me things and showed me a lot about myself. So that was a hard one to let go. He’s married now and we may shoot a hello or something every 2 or 3 years or so. I lost respect for him when during one of these times out of blue he asks me if I wanted to get into some trouble…And I told him he needed to go get in some ‘trouble’ with his wife.

disco

October 14th, 2011
9:17 am

Is it ever a good idea to go look them up and see how they are doing?

not for me it isn’t. the high school/college boyfriend played football and ultimately wound up in the NFL. naturally it wasn’t hard to find out what he was up to and friends absolutely loved to keep me posted on his life. a second guy – from my late 20s – I learned my lesson when I “cyberstalked” him. his career took off which didn’t surprise me. he’d married a woman who was in the military and they’d had a kid. still not much of a surprise because friends had kept me informed. what did surprise me was when I google imaged them and found photos of them taken with the obamas on a military base. that put a stop to my cyberstalking.

oh… good morning everybody….

Amy T

October 14th, 2011
9:17 am

We were sophomores in high school and I pursued him till he caught me. He was the most handsome, brilliant, and thoughtful person I had met up to that point in life, and we were sure we’d one day make it down the aisle. A few years later I went out on a blind date the first Saturday night in college and fell madly “in love” with a senior in college whose girlfriend was spending her junior year abroad. An instant connection was made and I broke it off with the hometown honey so I could go to all the KA parties and enjoy what college was all about! That new relationship, of course, was not to last, but I did make a lifelong friend that I still adore after all these years. The hometown honey eventually moved to Atlanta with his wife, and my hubby and I became social friends with them over the years. I had not been alone with him in 15 years till one day he invited me down to his law office where he had just spearheaded their move into a fabulous new office building. He was so proud of himself and I didn’t blame him one bit. During lunch I decided to apologize for dumping him, and told him how much he had meant to me in life and that our early, healthy relationship had formed the basis of how I thought married life was supposed to be. He agreed that we were very lucky people to have had “true love” in life not once but twice. It was a very special moment in life that I have never forgotten. Two months later he was killed in a highly publicized car accident on Ponce de Leon with 3 other attorneys. It broke my heart that my past had now slipped away, but I wouldn’t take a million dollars for knowing we had that last conversation. I’ve made sure ever since then to tell the people that make my life so great, how much they mean to me, because you never know the last time you’ll have that chance.

Celisea

October 14th, 2011
9:29 am

Morning lovelies,

Ahhh yeah, first love. I have two actually…I think. High school. Tall with deep dimples, very quiet,laid back and almost reserved around those that didn’t know him but. Haven’t talked to him. His sister worked where I work now a few years back. Every now and again I’d see her in passing. We’d chat a minute or two but I never asked about him. Started to a few times but I never got a good feel on an “opening” to go there, so I didn’t.

Second “first love” was more so on an “adult” scale. That’s the one I gave it all to……heart body and mind. Was in it a loooooooong time with him. Seem like it took even longer to get over him.

GMC

October 14th, 2011
9:34 am

It was the summer of 1964. Heady times. I was 16, she was spending the summer visiting family in my home town. Everytime I heard music, see, read, or hear something from that era, I automatically think of her. Have no clue where she is now. But in my mine she is and will always be the most beautiful woman in the world. Those hot summer nights at the drive-in movie, cruising around town in my 1956 Chevy listening to the Beach Boys, Tops and Temps. We were together constantly, and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do (up to that point in my life) when it came time to say goodbye when she left to go home at the end of the summer. We of course said we would write each other everyday and always be faithful until we could be back together again. Of course when you’re that far away things change. We did see each other off and on over the next few years, but could never quite rekindle the flame. There were others after her, but she was the first. I got drafted in 1967 and during the horrors of war, for some reason she was the one I often thought of during those terrible times. I remember very vividly when I was in Hue city during the Tet Offensive, and during one particularly bad firefight we were pinned down next to a wall and while looking for a way out of the very bad situation we were in, I saw where someone had written a girls first name (the same as hers) with “I love you” underneath it. on the wall of a building across the street in big letters. We made a break for the building, and were able to get to relative safety. Coincidence? Maybe……….

Leggs

October 14th, 2011
9:40 am

Awwww, Cmon. That goes back to yesterday’s topic. If you like someone, you should let them know. But, you got a good friend out of it all.

@Randyt ~ you are a mess.

@Justme ~ that sounds like exactly what I would have said (lol).

“We were sophomores in high school and I pursued him till he caught me” This sentence cracked me up!

CmonSeriously

October 14th, 2011
9:47 am

Yeah, you live and learn, but being a best friend and making that move aint easy. Had a good friend for a while, after HS she turned into a different person, or I did for that matter, either way, next time we saw each other, it wasn’t near the same.

disco

October 14th, 2011
9:49 am

off topic – this morning on my way in to work while I was at a red light there was this guy jogging. I never did get to see his face since he ran across the street and I made a right turn. still, from the back, this man was real nice. nice legs, butt, back and shoulders. I remember thinking that I understood how some men have been known to get distracted and run off the road. he’s most definitely got to be somebody’s love story – past or present….

kimmie

October 14th, 2011
9:51 am

Morning All! Boy am I glad the week is ending! I is tired!

My first crushes/loves showed me early what heartbreak felt like. My first crush was in 6th grade and it was this very cute chocolate drop with dimples and a little fro. He looked like young MJ when he was in the Jackson 5. We would smile and shyly flirt with each other. It was a case of mixed signals with him and my crush was unrequited. I came to school one day and found out he had asked this girl named Stacy for a chance. She was just okay but all the little boys liked her cause she was already a little tramp!!LOL!! But I digress. My high school love that I went to my jr prom with broke my heart when he dumped me for a non-sista. My first serious love that I had my 1st time with told me, as a college jr, that I was too into my “career”!LOL! What career, still a student with no skills?

Anyway, it’s all good, I wish them all well! Have no desire whatsoever to look them up.

CmonSeriously

October 14th, 2011
9:51 am

I think this topic is going to have a lot of, how do you guys put it, MOIST talk?

Fion

October 14th, 2011
9:52 am

“Is it ever a good idea to go look them up and see how they are doing?”

If you notice one thing about the fairytale of Cinderella, she only went to the Ball once.

JustMe, Slim

October 14th, 2011
9:54 am

That sounds like exactly what I would have said

Leggs – I wonder if folks ever get out of that ‘always fishing’ stuff. Just the other day, this older guy who I thought was such a sweet man at first (68yrs old) came at me about ‘hanging out’. First of all, the fact that this nearly 70yr old was even considering me dealing with him on a romantic level was a shocker but then for him to be married too was just crazy to me. I’ve met his wife and she seems to just as sweet as pie. So guess I’ve added him to the Lost of Respect list too. Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water…dun dun dun dun dundundudnudndudn…here comes JAWS. (Janky ASS Wedded Snakes) lol

Randyt (aka...Been There, Done That, Have a Closet Full of T-Shirts)

October 14th, 2011
9:55 am

@ GMC …great story. It is amazing what we reach for in times of chaos and fear. I’ve read some accounts of the battle of Hue city..the stories were unbelievable. I salute you.

Donna B

October 14th, 2011
9:58 am

Actually, I found my first love when we were in pre-school, I remember that day like it was yesterday, him pushing me on the swing set. We parted ways until i was in the ninth grade,then we attended the same high school. After high school i went to college he join the navy. In 1987 we got married. I can trully say he’s the love of my life! Two kids and 24yrs of happiness.

JustMe, Slim

October 14th, 2011
9:59 am

he’s most definitely got to be somebody’s love story – past or present…

Or someone’s nightmare – past or present…

Leggs

October 14th, 2011
10:00 am

@disco ~ aren’t we all somebody’s love story past or present (lol). Keep your eyes on the road before you run into a lampost. :wink:

Leggs

October 14th, 2011
10:03 am

I love it, love it. I’m hit with JAWS all the time. Some men and women want to see if “they still got it.” Heck, try role playing. Act like you’re strangers at a bar. I realize this isn’t the same, but keep your fangs in your own dang pool.

Fion

October 14th, 2011
10:05 am

Ah, ease up on Disco. She has GEICO, State Farm, Allstate or somebody. Have at it baby. Go ahead a dream about it. It ain’t illegal yet.

SexyCool

October 14th, 2011
10:07 am

My first love is one of my oldest friends. What he taught me about love is that a person can really like you, but not be in love with you.

And I also learned that no matter how much you love a person that person may choose someone else.

I was 16.

kimmie

October 14th, 2011
10:08 am

Leggs – Yeah, that’s what I was thinking – some folk want to see if they still got it!

JustMe, Slim

October 14th, 2011
10:10 am

Leggs – Outside of the wheelchair, this old white guy reminds me of the dude from that movie “Disorderlies” with the Fat Boys…white hair, hump in the back, shakes and all. If I was that kind of person, I would’ve done an Anna Nicole on his azz…but that isn’t me.

kimmie

October 14th, 2011
10:11 am

SCool – Now that is some real heartbreak right there that I learned early – a person really liking you but not in love with you. There is really nothing you can do about it either.

czBrat

October 14th, 2011
10:17 am

HiYas!

read a few, skimmed most. seems like this lovely morning has folks cruising down memory lane. :)

my first love was in jr. high. we were crazy about each other for the entire 8th grade school year. the big thing where i grew up was to exchange name plates when you’re a couple (it seems every panamanian gets a gold necklace with their name on it at birth :lol: ). well, over the summer he asked for his necklace back. no explanation. first day of school the following year this lil redhead tramp is flaunting his chain to all her friends. i met up with him after school to ask what was going on and he told me he got tired of waiting. she gave it up to him, so he gave her his necklace.

lesson? i knew long before then that young boys were not interested in “good girls”. at least not for long. i thik that’s why i threw myself into sports, social clubs and studies. but what’s more important is that i learned not to compromise who I choose to be.

last i heard, he was doing time for something foolish and she was at four baby daddies by age 30.

i'm swiss™

October 14th, 2011
10:20 am

Morning, folks…

I would comment on this, but I don’t want to have to put on a B.A.B. t-shirt. Guess I’ll lurk until after lunch, when the topic turns to your first 3-way. :lol: