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Social life keeping you single?

Earlier this week we talked about knowing what we really want in a mate and ending up with someone totally different. It reminded me of another dating conundrum: the thing that attracts you to someone in the beginning is often the same thing that drives a wedge between you two later.

For example, a man meets a woman out at a party. She is vibrant, friendly, full of life and is pretty active on the social scene. At first, he loves this about her. They get together and suddenly it’s a problem that his little social butterfly won’t sit home with him in a quiet cocoon of an existence. See what happened there? It’s a classic example of how things become a little more complicated when expectations kick in.

A lot of people I know who go out a lot are ready and willing to take on domestic/married/coupled up life. I believe that you can actually strike a nice balance of both if you wanted to. A little compromise goes a long way, doesn’t it?

Is it possible partying is keeping some people single? Yes, especially when they are out in the clubs, bars, every single night getting numbers, getting wasted – rinse, repeat, etc. That is not the same as living it up and enjoying the freedom of singlehood, though, is it? What do you think?

Have you ever dated someone who told that you go out too much?

How many times a month do you go out with friends, party, or attend some social event? Do you think this improves your chances of meeting someone? Has it been a distraction from exploring things with someone special?

When does going out and partying too much become a red flag for you?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

291 comments Add your comment

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
7:07 am

When it prevents either/both of you from getting things done that are needed, not wanted. If it becomes detrimental then it has gone too far.

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
8:13 am

If you’re in a relationship acting single (partying, going out with your homegirls, etc.) then you most likely need to remain single.

Being in a relationship is about finding a harmony with the person you’re with, and if one of you is a social butterfly and the other isn’t, then balance is key.

Reverse the question; if a man was still hitting the clubs (strip and otherwise) with his homeboys, what would his lady start to believe?

Save the diatribes, but as far as I know, males and females go to clubs (strip and otherwise) for the purpose of finding the opposite sex; if only for a night or longer.

Figment

October 7th, 2011
8:39 am

If they’re more focused on partying than working on a relationship, then they should stay single.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
8:42 am

Good morning…..

If only that was my problem!

I agree with Dan/Figment. If your mate is troubled by all of the partying and if you truly want the relationship you would respect his concerns and tone down the partying. If you don’t want to party with your mate at all then you’re with the wrong person.

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
8:58 am

Does it at all seem like we are all assuming that we live with the person?

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
9:00 am

I’m thinking they’re dating but the partying is preventing them from spending quality time with one another.

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
9:01 am

@CS

Not I. Specifically, if you’re beginning to date someone that you can only see every other Friday night because “someone’s in town”, “it’s such and such’s birthday” or other excuses it gets old quick.

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:03 am

I agree completely with the last paragraph of this blog. I also feel that if your SO does go out like that they need attention. That attention is something they need for their ego or simply something you’re not giving them. I really feel the people in relationships out here apply as well but more like this is their club or their last little piece of being single with out causing stress (or they consider this their blog for personal chat). I know I said I wasn’t going there again but this is the TOD, therefore, it’s applicable.

A relationship is about being harmonious with your SO. I never wanted to do anything without my last SO. If I went out she was with me. Not that we didn’t have our own hobbies, friends, activities and such but we wanted to be together. In any relationship those things are key for success.

As far as compromise, I suck at that. I’m over-educated and independently wealthy, I despise compromise. I want and do what I want when I want. That is a no compromise policy for me. Asking a SO to change their actions is a recipe for disaster for the most part. Especially, if those actions are going to make the relationship work. I say if you’re at that point you need to back out and find another SO.

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:11 am

CmonSeriously, if your not living with your SO then I say most bets are off. I’d still be worried about what I wasn’t giving my SO if they were going out like stated in this blog. If your going out to where singles are you want attention from the opposite sex. Why else would you be there?

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
9:16 am

Sometimes you just want to get away from home and be around people, anyone single and living alone can completely understand that, even if you go to a bar on a slow night, it’s still nice to get out around people in general, not specifically attention from the opposite sex.

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
9:30 am

@CS

There’s a difference between ’sometimes’ and ‘every (other) weekend’, shoot I’d even say more than 2 weekdays in a month.

Mike P

October 7th, 2011
9:32 am

Good Morning All,

When does going out and partying too much become a red flag for you? – When I have to scheduled-in into her “appointment book” during non-business hours/days.

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
9:37 am

If you have to get penned into her appointment book, she’s dating other dudes, RUN, any chick that is dating multiple guys at the same time wants it all and isn’t willing to sacrafice, better off without her.

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:39 am

CmonSeriously, if you want to be around people because you’re lonely you go to a friend’s or family’s house, not a bar full of strangers. If your at that bar you’re looking for sexual attention one way or another.

There’s so many better ways to not be lonely than a alcohol soaked bar breeding addiction and false pretenses. Join a club of interest.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
9:39 am

Morning All and happy Friday!

Grown people do what they want to do. People will also make time for the things they want. A person does not have to put down all of their friends and things they enjoy because they are now in a relationship. But at the same time, if they are really serious about making it work, they will find a way to significantly fit this new person into their life.

This was actually an issue I ran into quite a bit early in my dating years. Folks that want to live single, but still be coupled up. I’ve even heard of marrieds where one still wants to go out with the gang to clubs without the spouse. People like that are clearly not ready for a committed relationship.

After a certain point, all the clubbing should get old. I wouldn’t sit around waiting on anyone for that to happen. Look for someone likeminded.

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:45 am

Mike P, that is very subjective. Only an individual can answer that for themselves.

With your example, I’d say it’s the beginning of a relationship and to be expected with a socially active lady.

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
9:47 am

HST
Not saying that I am lonely, just saying I want to get out and do something with people. BIG differrence, and sometimes you just don’t want to be around friends, strangers are just fine, new is a good thing, not a bad. Friends are great and all but sometime you need an escape.

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:49 am

Opps, at 9:39 I meant to address Mike P.

I am is Ying....

October 7th, 2011
9:50 am

…He is my Yang!

Mike P

October 7th, 2011
9:51 am

@CmonSeriously : Agreed! lol

@HST: I am referring to after awhile, say at/after date three (over two month period)… if she hasn’t figured out what’s-what by then and she still wants to be “socially active,” I’m GONE! She’s free to be “socially-active” without me, she can then pencil-in some other dude.

I am His Ying....

October 7th, 2011
9:52 am

…He is my Yang. Y’all know what i Mean.

I am His Ying....

October 7th, 2011
9:54 am

…I am his Yang. Y’all know what I mean. lol

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:54 am

Cmon, I agree completely. I think if we don’t keep up our individuality then we loose ourselves. I will not date a girl (for more than sex) who doesn’t have hobbies, friends and interests. Last thing I want is a clingy girl. After all wasn’t it our individuality that attracted the other to us and us to them?

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
9:55 am

@Mike

If I’m seeing a woman only 3 times in a 2 month period – I been gone shawty.

Not that she needs to be at my beck and call, but if I don’t see her at least once a week, then let’s just say my memory gets bad.

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:56 am

MikeP, I thought I said what you did, however, I agree.

HST

October 7th, 2011
9:57 am

3 times in a 2 month period means you aren’t the only one…well, most likely.

HST

October 7th, 2011
10:00 am

Did anyone get banned yesterday?

Mike P

October 7th, 2011
10:00 am

@Dan : dats what I’m saying! No more “imma socially active woman, lemme pencil you in” chicks for me, I’ve learned my lesson already.

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
10:04 am

@Mike

I’m saying, if she’d have said that to me before any date there wouldn’t have been one. Ion play that mess.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
10:05 am

Unless its a requirement for someones job, that they have to attend a lot of social functions, I see this being more of an issue for the very young. Speaking for myself, the club/bar scene really does get old. You see your friends moving on in their careers and personal life, even if not married, they are coming into their own. Social activities start to center around concrete interests, like running or biking, sking, music, etc. If you have kids, you are busy with activities around them. It’s nothing sadder that a 40+ adult still trying to hang out in the clubs.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
10:12 am

Sooo, HST…should you find yourself in a relationship, will you stop participating in this forum?

oneofeach4me

October 7th, 2011
10:14 am

I like to go out to clubs to dance… it’s that what the dancefloor is for? I actually do not even want, need, seek, or invite sexual attention. Going out with a group of my girl, dancing and having a few drinks relieves stress for me. Sometimes me and my dude go out together with the group. However, we only do this (separately or together) about once or twice in a month. We have kids, bills, school, dogs, and a life to tend to. Going out too often becomes a habit and can be a dangerous one. Everything in moderation.

HST

October 7th, 2011
10:19 am

Great post kimmie, I feel the exact same way. I don’t feel almost 40 but I don’t want to not be age appropriate either. Night clubs usually leave you smelling like a cigarette and you almost always leave with regret. With today’s Social Media meeting an interest in a bar is outdated, IMO.

disco

October 7th, 2011
10:23 am

good morning everyone. to co-sign kimmie’s comment re “old” folks hanging around at the club. I recently told a 50+ male friend of mine that he needs to leave the clubs alone (on topic – I did point out that his clubbing likely had something to do with his second divorce). his reply was that he likes to dance. my reply was that I like to dance too but I lean more toward dancing around the living room. he insists that can’t be nearly as much fun. I beg to differ. growing up my family was known for a good house party. most of my friends’ children love to come to my house because I’ll move the furniture out of the way and let them show us what the youngsters are doing these days. I still hit the club on occasion but it’s usually when I’m travelling and its what the group wants to do. at a recent family reunion, we cousins hit a club about 40-50 deep. we had a blast.

oneofeach4me

October 7th, 2011
10:31 am

Going to a club every once in a while under the age of 40 is no biggie. 40+ is when you start to look lame if for no other reason than you cannot dance anymore or at the very least don’t know the new moves! LOL

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
10:32 am

disco – Sounds like your family is like mine, especially the extended family!!LOL!!! Those are some of the best memories I have of our family reunions – when we get up and all dance!!! We are going to DC in December for my oldest aunt’s 90th birthday celebration. She is 90 going on 60. I mean seriously, she does not miss a beat and looks fabulous. She is sometimes on a cane, but bet she will be out there on that dance floor at that party, cane & all. I can’t wait!

Figment

October 7th, 2011
10:34 am

I’ve been done with the club/bar scene for a long time. I also enjoy dancing but until I find a decent 70’s/80’s night club to check out I can skip out on the dancing. I’d much rather spend my free time with my SO. Hiking or camping, cuddled up on the couch with a good movie, fishing, heck even shopping with my SO is a blast, and I hate shopping!

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
10:35 am

Morning and happy Friday!!

I’ve even heard of marrieds where one still wants to go out with the gang to clubs without the spouse. People like that are clearly not ready for a committed relationship

To Kimmie’s statement, this behavior happens. One acquaintance was telling me about a pajama party he attended and you know me, I asked…”um so where was so and so” and he said at home with the girls. I had asked him what’s up with that??? He simply stated they lived together before they married and she knew what he was then. Really?? He said he does his part. HE SAID, I spend time with the girls, sole provider for the family and puts in a bit of “family time.” He feels justified after that and it’s off to do his thing. And he said, yes he said “I do my part so so and so can’t say a word to me when I go out” It’s nothing for me to run across him downtown, Cobb County, wherever. Yes, he said those words to me. I told him that’s a dang shame.

Another one that I’m much tighter with and I can go there with him more so, is always out and about but in a “different” way. He’s slick with his. We became friends probably at the start of their marriage. Very nice wife. He too plays the “great dad/husband” role to a “T” but he ain’t right either. She’s always home and he’s always gone. He STAY in the street.

I tell ‘em but really what’s that?

Went to Strip with a few friends and yeah there was some 60 somethng looking cat moving from chick to chick, drink in hand and tryna mac. Yes, mac fits what he was doing and his age. Funny thing though was if she was hawt, some young cat would just knock him off and take over…that was funny but sad to watch.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
10:37 am

oneofeach – Lame is right. I remember those old men that would be at the clubs when I used to go, and to be honest, most didn’t even try to dance. They were either glued to the bar or holding the wall up. Most either looked like dirty old men or just sad.

oneofeach4me

October 7th, 2011
10:41 am

@Kimmie ~ yup. Those are the ones that when I was about 10 years younger.. I made sure they were no where near me when I exited the place!!! CHESTER, CHESTER….. u know the rest!

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
10:41 am

Celisea – I’m just shaking my head as I read your post. But you know, folks will only do to you what you allow. And yeah, if they were doing that while you were dating and getting serious and you didn’t say anything, what makes you think they’ll change after you marry.

But hey, to each his/her own.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
10:43 am

Yep Kimmie you’re right. Folks know better but not willing to do better.

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
10:50 am

@Cel

Dude is not far off.

Key point “sole provider.” Again, switch the pronoun, if it was a ’she’ instead of a ‘he’, I have no doubt that some of the ladies on here wouldn’t begrudge her a single minute of ‘alone time’.

Balancing work/home life is delicate act for anyone, and so that “I’mma do me – don’t bother me” time is important if only for perspective.

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
10:52 am

K, speaking from a guys point of view, yes it is very sad for some of those older guys, imagine you were thrown into a situation where you just got divorced, you don’t know any single people or where to find them, or how to be socially acceptable at your age and all your friends are married. Women, I really wish you could understand what it has to be like for a guy trying to pick up girls, you girls have it far far easier, dudes are really easy. A girl that is going to a bar to meet someone and have a fling has 10 time the chance of a guy, just because guys are pigs, I am one, I know.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
10:53 am

“I have no doubt that some of the ladies on here wouldn’t begrudge her a single minute of ‘alone time’. ”

Then you don’t know some of us very well.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
10:57 am

Dan – Let’s not make this a man vs woman thing. We all need an outlet or some down time. No justification for this cat. Pajama party?? C’mon. I can think of a number of things you can do as an outlet or some alone time…that was NOT alone time, “me time” maybe but definitely not winding down time. But he all but said it…..”she knew what I was before we married.” I think that pretty much says it all.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
10:58 am

ANY individual that is ALWAYS in the streets may as well be single. Period.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
10:59 am

SCool – Cosign. If any woman is hanging out at clubs or parties on the regular, living and looking single, while her hubby is at home with the kids – uhm no, that’s equal opportunity trifling.

Cmon – I save my sympathy for folks that are having a hard time finding a job or dealing with serious health issues. A divorced older man trying to pick up women – nope. He’ll be fine, trust.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:02 am

Tuesday night, I *really, really* wanted to go run with my BGR group after work, but I knew that I hadn’t really seen TheDude since Monday morning because of our current work schedule. Since he would have left to go to work while I was gone running, I made the choice to take my rear to the house instead, spend some time with my sweetie and make him a great sandwich to take to work.

I was able to go to the group run yesterday evening while he was gong to LA Fitness. Worked out great!

Randyt (aka...DON'T HAVE ONE OF THESE T SHIRTS)

October 7th, 2011
11:02 am

Every once in awhile, I see a married couple who, to me, aren’t a married couple. Instead, one or both of them are still single in head and heart. My opinion only, but it seems that if there is a genuine commitment, then the need for the party scene diminishes…or should.

@ cmonseriously…I agree totally. This is why I almost never do the bar pickup thing …odds are really bad for a guy at most bars (and I paid a good part of my way through college playing poker, so I think in terms of odds and probabilities). One thing about Internet dating is that it is stacked in a guy’s favor. Better odds. (With the exception of a few legendary “meat markets” in ATL that stack the odds in a guy’s favor too ;-)

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:03 am

What up Blog Fam!

I believe people to need to be upfront and honest about who they are and what they will and will not do. Then let the other person decide for themselves if they want the red or blue pill.

In the words of Morpheus:

“You take the blue pill – the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill – you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.”

Kimmie: You ready for Breaking Bad’s ending?

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
11:03 am

@Cel,Kimmie, SC

I’m not getting into a back and forth, but I’ll say this and end mine:

I’m not talking about the (specific) activity, simply the time alone once in a while.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:04 am

For the second dude….

I was headed to the track up in Smyrna and he approaching coming from the opposite direction. I spotted him, married as ever now before he saw me. Windows down, cleaned up, roof opened, looking fly. Now you may say that all harmless. Possibly, possibly not. I was he was scavaging. He was looking at himself in the mirror and looking to see who was looking at him. When he spotted me, he beckoned me to pull over. The expression on my face was like :| really?? I didn’t have to say a word. All he could say was “what” and proceeded to explain. I dind’t say a word…nothing. All he could do was laugh. It’s not funny but I’m like really man….really?

Exactly SexyC – Even if you’re innocently just “hanging out”…keep looking for trouble it will find you.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:05 am

“They were either glued to the bar or holding the wall up. Most either looked like dirty old men or just sad.”

Haven’t been to Bigelows is many, many years, but this is exactly the clientele that goes there. On the flip side, you have overweight women in tight fitting outfits looking like sausage oozing out of their clothes.

I love to dance and I think I’ve been to a club twice this year. Every blue moon, it’s cool to go and dance (if you know how to dance). To go just to stand around is sad.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:07 am

Dan – EVERYbody needs time alone with some regularity, not even just once in a while, but you seemed to be saying that we would cosign someone hanging out all the time simply because she was the sole provider. Not the case.

So…with your follow up point, perhaps we share a similar view on this issue.

Randyt (aka...DON'T HAVE ONE OF THESE T SHIRTS)

October 7th, 2011
11:07 am

I have to disagree with your premise, Dan, re the cat who did his thing because he was the sole provider. Relationships, and especially marriage, imply a commitment. There is a difference between ‘alone time” and “party time”. I think where the line is drawn lies in the realm of the “social interraction” encountered in the “alone time”. All games have implied or specified “fouls”. That is where the line is drawn. IMHO

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:08 am

“On the flip side, you have overweight women in tight fitting outfits looking like sausage oozing out of their clothes.”

LMAO…but so true…

The time or two in the past year or so that I have been to a “club” withOUT TheDude always makes me really glad to get home to him. (lol)

2CPTG

October 7th, 2011
11:08 am

’sup…..

“When does going out and partying too much become a red flag for you?”

….when she says, “I do”……til then, all’s fair in love, and war……

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:09 am

Good point, T-shirts! :) How are you fairing this day, my friend?

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:11 am

So ladies do you think it’s okay for a married person to flirt?

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:12 am

Exactly Randyt – Heck I’m happy when my kid finds an outlet because that creates time for me…me time. Of course I have to make sure there are dependable adults chaperoning and what not and the venue or activity is one that’s not harmful….but I’M SCREAMING AND YELLING AND JUMPING UP AND DOWN GLAD GLAD GLAD, when I can get some time for myself…lol Now, to be a husband and carrying a household, of course you need it. Doesn’t justify slumming though.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:13 am

For Real – No. Harmless or not…just leave that kind of stuff off if you’re married.

Randyt (aka...DON'T HAVE ONE OF THESE T SHIRTS)

October 7th, 2011
11:13 am

@SC…well, better than I deserve for sure. Back in ATL for at least a few weeks (subject to change if my company needs a fire put out here or in Europe and tells me to buy a ticket and take what I need for weeks away). Life is good. ;-)

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:15 am

Leggs: You ain’t lying about Bigelows. My cousin dragged me to that place and everyone in there knew I didn’t belong in that place. They couldn’t tell if I was a cop, child support collector or a stripper.

Cel: Both dudes are wrong for pissing on their marriage and their wives are wrong too but if they like it I love it.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:15 am

Glad to hear it.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:15 am

Well stated, Randyt.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
11:16 am

4 Real – I am SO Ready!! But kinda sad too, cause I look forward to the show. Hey, we watched this new show the other night called Homeland. I think it was on Showtime. About this guy that was a POW/MIA in Iraq for 8 years. The marines find him and he comes home. This lady that I think works for FBI is trying to see if he was brainwashed and turned over any secrets while in captivity. She has issues herself, on anti-psychotic drugs. The guy comes back home to a wife & kids that have sort of moved on cause he hasnt’ been around for 8 years.

It is good!

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
11:16 am

@Randy

Please see follow up.

I’m speaking from a son’s perspective. I sent my mom’s on plenty of trips when I was able – she been out of the country more than me. In part, because I saw those nights at home alone with two kids – “hey, there’s a play/concert/trip I wanna go on” Me: “here.”

As stated in the follow up, I wasn’t commenting on the chosen activity, just the [well deserved] time.

disco

October 7th, 2011
11:19 am

re sexy cool’s comment re getting home to the dude after the club – I have long been of the opinion that the best part of the club was the “get some” after the club. if you take that out of the equation (and, as a single woman who is way past hookups, I take it out of the equation) clubbing loses so much of it’s appeal. recently I having a good time “car dancing” on a long drive to my reggae ipod play list. all I could think about was how much fun it would be to hit a reggae club and knock back a few drinks and end the evening with a good “break off”. of course – there are no reggae clubs where I live but it was a good fantasy for a short time.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:20 am

…..off the “off topic”

Da man is still here. Thought he’d be gone already. He’s been over twice this morning…only to let me know he’ll be back…later.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:21 am

@ForReal ~ I feel you. There are truly some characters up in that joint. Much like Marcos back in the day. I was early 20’s, so the cat daddies there made me very uncomfortable. Heck, they looked like old farts to me then. If I rolled up to a club with a bunch of 20, 30 year olds, I guess I would like one too.

As far as the flirting goes, NO. A married man or even a man in a committed relationship should not be flirting with anyone other than their mate. Sure, there are many levels to flirting, but the best definition is if you’re not comfortable doing it while in the presence of your mate, then you’re flirting (and being disrespectful).

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
11:21 am

Some have the “I don’t have a ring on my finger yet” attitude when it comes to certain behaviors not condusive to a committed relationship. I truly believe you have to be “married” in your head before any papers are signed or vows taken. Some things just don’t get turned off like a fountain the day of your wedding.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:22 am

And unfortunately, this situation occurs often. I see it all the time in my coed softball league. People who are married but you NEVER see their spouse.

Since TheDude and I closed on the house and began wedding planning, I play ball a lot less. And even with my running group, while there are opportunities to run with them at least six days a week, I typically only go once a week.

Besides, both of us prefer to enjoy leisurely activities that we can participate in together. We like each others’ company just that much.

Randyt (aka...DON'T HAVE ONE OF THESE T SHIRTS)

October 7th, 2011
11:22 am

I know what you were saying, Dan. I think trust and alone time are essential in a relationship and you have always struck me as a person of honor, as indicated by what yu just wrote. I was more concerned about the attitude of the dude. It may have been entirely honorable also, but I just sensed that he might be defending or justifying “extracurricular” activities.

What you wrote is good.

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:22 am

Cel: Do you think dressing sexy is flirting?

Kimmie: I agree. I go through withdrawal when that show stops. That new show sounds interesting. I like my show to include all aspects of life othewise I find the characters unbelievable.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:25 am

I don’t think flirting is all that bad as I think as humans we tend to do that naturally. Sometimes in passing there’s a flicker and that’s okay if it’s more than likely you won’t cross paths again. I think intentional efforts to keep it going or once a flicker has been “felt”, with someone that’s a constant around you or you closely interact shold be off limits. IMO, it becomes intentional which at that point becomes something of possibly crossing lines.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:27 am

For Real – Sexy? No. Sleazy/trashy? Yep. I think you would have to define sexy. IMO, sexy is a well fitted suite that hangs to a tee and sexy shows. I think T & A hanging out all over the place is trashy and inappropriate.

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:27 am

Leggs: Does same go for women?

Kimmie: “I truly believe you have to be “married” in your head before any papers are signed or vows taken.” – That’s the only place marriage truely counts. Paper, religion or kids cannot keep a couple a couple together.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:28 am

guess I wokuld LOOK like one too….

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:28 am

shoes…now show. Or a nicely laid maxy (sp) dress that enhances your figure is sexy. Nipples showing and butt hanging every which way ain’t cute

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:28 am

@ForReal ~ YEP.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
11:29 am

4 Real – Absolutely

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
11:30 am

To quote Hackers, spandex is a priviledge, not a right

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:30 am

Where did that “k” come from?

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:30 am

How come it feels like For Real’s questions are the bread crumbs trail that leads to the lion’s den???

Randyt (aka...DON'T HAVE ONE OF THESE T SHIRTS)

October 7th, 2011
11:31 am

Not sure where I stand on the flirting. It has hit me recently that I hardly notice other women when I am involved. That has not always been the case.

It sort of falls under the umbrella of “what is right for the goose, is right for the gander”.. Not a bad idea once in awhile in a moment of fleeting “intrigue” to say to oneself, “How would I feel about my significant other doing exactly what I am doing right now???”. That one question should give you the clearest indication of what is appropriate, and what isn’t.

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:33 am

Cel: Are you changing your NO? I agree that flirting is as natural as breathing is for humans. Which is why I asked the question about the sexy clothes. We all want to look good and feel good regardless if we are married. Also, we all want to be desired by the opposite sex hence the reason for dressing sexy for women and brushing our teeth for men.

No sexy vs trashy is relative

For Real now letting Cel take a gander at his gators + black dress socks + short set = sexy

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
11:34 am

Really depends on who you are flirting with.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:35 am

suit suit suit…not suite

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:35 am

Funny Cel, I just read your 11:30. You don’t trust me? Nevermind don’t answer that.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
11:35 am

4 Real – You better quit, getting the ladies all hot and bothered with that short set & dress socks! And the gators just take it to a whole nother level!! :lol:

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:37 am

For Real – Not on the fence but not a hard no. Like I said, some things are natural but it’s only “natural” unless you make it or it becomes an effort or intentional. If I pass a dude in the store and he catches my eye or vice versa, a quick glance? Okay. If I go back there again and again and again or vice versa and he’s committed/married and me the same, naw that’s just wrong.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:37 am

I’m laughing at you and myself, Celisea.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:38 am

For Real – LOL at you leading us into the lion’s den and the hawt short set accompanied by gators.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:38 am

Are the socks knee-high or mid-calf? Mid-calf is sexxxxxxyyyyy!!!

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
11:39 am

Leggs – Ever get the feeling you shouldn’t be doing something? That’s how I felt after question number 2…LOLOLOL

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:39 am

Kimmie: “And the gators just take it to a whole nother level!!” YEAHHHHH BOYYYYYYYYYY!!!!
You thought I was done but I guess you didn’t see the mushrooms on my belt huh?

For Real does a little James Brown and flashes Kimmie his belt.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
11:40 am

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I know these folks think I’m crazy in here today!

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
11:41 am

@Randy T – thanks

About flirting: apparently, I’ve been involved in several “attempts” and “exchanges” of flirtatious behavior – according to the wife.

I don’t notice attempts to flirt with me, don’t know when I’m doing it, so it’s really in the eye of the beholder.

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
11:41 am

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:43 am

ScooL: See you got a good eye. I ain’t a regular Joe I’m a trend setter. One sock is mid-calf the other sock is knee high.

For Real now posted up on the wall with one foot propped up on the wall allowing ScooL to bask in his fineness.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
11:47 am

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
11:48 am

Good morning!

I believe what’s too much’ partying can only be defined by ur mate,not outsiders. Coz truthfully,no two couples are the same.

And this nonsense I hear that u have to be with ur wife almost everywhere,I don’t buy.

My wife likes to go to the mall and movies and up and about most times. I’m the total opposite. Once I check in on a Friday nite,I’m done unless I have to run a grocery errant. I have all the entertainment in my house for the most part.

The difference is,every now and then I will like to hit up Haristons or some age appropriate joint. My wife is the Total opposite. She will say,’okay’let me take a nap for a minute’ and u know that’s a wrap coz she ain’t waking up!

I will hit the joint alone,no problem.

If married folks had to go to public with the wife,sports park with the wife,movies with the wife.falcons with the wife,NBA basketball with the wife,u name it,the divorce rates would be much higher!

Looks like we have singles spinning their fantasies of what married life is like.

We all need our seperate existence to breath.

After all,haven’t u heard,If u luv it,set it free,if it doesn’t come back to u,it wasn’t urs in the first place!

For Real

October 7th, 2011
11:49 am

Slim: That is funny. The crazy thing is you can put the people into two categories. Those the look and Those the turn away.

For Real now showing Slim the hole in his sock with his pinky toe sticking thru but Slim can’t turn away.

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
11:51 am

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
11:57 am

Perhaps it’s me, but that outfit doesn’t sound very appealing. I’m picturing him in his gators, corduroy short outfilt and socks held up with those sock straps.

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
11:57 am

For Real – Yeah but what about the one with the guy standing behind the girl. He’s the guy that would push his girl into the killer to give him time to get away LOL Oh and what about the BIG chick with the teeny tiny man. LOL

Slim bites For Real’s Pig in a blanket

Mike P

October 7th, 2011
11:59 am

Why does it seem that when married women flirts with single guys its harmless, but when the reverse is true, that’s wrong?

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:00 pm

You should ask the next married woman that flirts with you? Ask her why she’s able to do that and not see anything wrong with it :)

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
12:00 pm

And for the record, I don’t do Haunted Houses…I’ll never forget back when I was at Ga Southern, they had a Haunted Forest. I almost broke my ankle trying to run in those woods to get away. I get startled even when I forget the beau is in the house and I look up to see him standing there. lol

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
12:05 pm

“Slim bites For Real’s Pig in a blank” – ummmmm…….

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
12:06 pm

@SlimNu ~ I’m with you on being easily startled. So much I had to tell my friends during my pregnancy to not sneek up on me or “boo” me when they walk into my cubicle. I can be in my bathroom and my child appears scaring the heebie jeebies out of me…

CmonSeriously

October 7th, 2011
12:10 pm

Mike, there is no double standard there

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
12:11 pm

Good come back Celisea…

thewindwhistler

October 7th, 2011
12:12 pm

That is a great question. I really like it. I can absolutely, positively see going out every night. That is where the action is. Staying home is fine for the infirmed, elderly and recluses. Live for the moment, go for the gold, going the limit is all there is. Leave the daytime for others, come out and shine at night. All of that being said, I go to bed at 9:00 pm. Sleep grandly, wake up with a wonderful feeling, wonderful day, zippedy du dah, everything going my way.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:14 pm

Sassy – :) Always always making it a battle

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:15 pm

thewindwhistler – All of that being said, I go to bed at 9:00 pm. Sleep grandly, wake up with a wonderful feeling, wonderful day, zippedy du dah, everything going my way

LOL…I see you got jokes :mrgreen:

abc

October 7th, 2011
12:22 pm

When does going out and partying too much become a red flag for you?

It seems to me, in the context of of this topic and given many of the responses (I haven’t read even half of them though), what we’re talking about here is boozers out on the town. Sidebar is a desire to go out boozing on the town (clubs, ball games, whatever) without your SO, so as to minimize any governance that they might have on your behavior, or that you’d impose upon yourself due to their presence — ergo, you can’t go messing with chicks in the club if wifey is there, nor make a spectacle of yourself the boys at the ball game.

Uh… grow up! The club scene is a dead end waste of time, money and brain cells. Ball games that you attend with your wife should be enjoyable — if you’re married to a chick that doesn’t like to attend games at Turner Field but you’re a die hard Braves fan, maybe there’s a bit of a disconnect between you and yours.

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
12:23 pm

One thing I know,especially for u the younger ladies,when u get married and ate blessed with kids,u are going to become more motherly,faster than ur hubby is gonna be fatherly.

It’s that females maturing faster thing. So it’s more than likely,ur hubby won’t be grounded and as wanting to be homely as urself coz he will still have that immature bug in him. Don’t fret on him too much if he wants to go out eve now and the,without u.

And U,on ur part,as long as u don’t neglect ur body,get complacent and get oozing fat,u be aaaaaight. Trust! :lol:

And

Mike P

October 7th, 2011
12:28 pm

@Celisea: You really don’t wanna know all the excuses/reasons I hear about why the marrieds flirts with me, nor would you wanna know how often they flirt with me and cavalier they go about it. lets just say, I’m holding on to dear life that my faith in the institution of marriage, and its waning.

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
12:30 pm

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:35 pm

Mike – You really don’t wanna know all the excuses/reasons I hear about why the marrieds flirts with me, nor would you wanna know how often they flirt with me and cavalier they go about it

Not to to be too blunt but other’s behavior should be neither here nor there with you. You can only control what you do.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:38 pm

Mike P – Maybe you’re a hawttie. You can’t help it :)

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
12:40 pm

They can’t flirt by themselves. And if there is ongoing flirting, you are an active party, right? So, it would seem that all parties are misbehaving.

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
12:45 pm

Leggs – Did you ever see that vid of a prank where they scare this pregnant women when she walks into the house and her water breaks and gushes out?

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
12:48 pm

Re: topic

My ex was and still is a super partier. It was always this homeboy’s birthday, VIP here, VIP there, poker party on and on and on. He is one of those ‘life of party’ type folks and it got old. There is nothing wrong with a little party here and there but if you are not taking care of your responsibilities then partying should not be one of your priorities. He’d ‘ball out’ on a night in the VIP but be behind on the gas, electric, insert other bill here.

Mark

October 7th, 2011
12:48 pm

Celisea…do you even know English? Jeez…you might be an intelligent person, but you come off like some sort of street trash. Do you really think anyone of quality is going to be interested in you when you can’t even form an intelligent sentence? Wow…this girl needs some education. I hope you never breed…the world doesn’t need anymore illiterate idiots.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
12:51 pm

@SlimUno ~ no, I haven’t. Why would anyone even consider scaring a pregnant woman?

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:54 pm

Mark – Jeez…you might be an intelligent person, but you come off like some sort of street trash.

Did you read what you wrote? Oxymoronic at best…lol As long as I “come off as intelligent” then umm no need for me to retort :mrgreen: Let me stay trashy :)

Here let me go further and help you out:

Colloquialism – A word or phrase that is common in everyday, unconstrained conversation rather than in formal speech, academic writing, or paralinguistics.

Yes, yes I know some regular sitting back taking jabs. Bet you won’t say it under your real moniker.

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
12:55 pm

a desire to go out boozing on the town (clubs, ball games, whatever) without your SO, so as to minimize any governance that they might have on your behavior

abc – Agreed in some cases. I know at times if I expressed a desire to go along, my ex would be like, “No one else is bringing their girlfriends or boo’s”…If I pointed out that some other girls were still going he’d combat that with, well they are just friends of the crew, not anyone’s SO.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:57 pm

I just feel honored to be one of the ones that gets an anonymous jab from someone sitting back in the cut hating :mrgreen:

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
12:58 pm

Oh and I know who you are…bite me

How’s THAT for trashy

HST

October 7th, 2011
12:59 pm

Mark, watch out these girls think they’re witty and their crap doesn’t stink.

Mike, I meet more married women ready to have sex than single women. So much so lately, I have rebuked the institution of marriage.

I do think we all flirt no matter what the relationship status. We all want to know we’re desired sexually. Now being inappropriate about those actions is different than harmless smiles, winks or second looks.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
1:00 pm

you might be an intelligent person and when you can’t even form an intelligent sentence? Wow…this girl needs some education

Which is it Markie Mark? Yeah that’s funny. And you’re addressing me?

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
1:02 pm

Every so often, an element invades this blog that is like a cancer. It is quite unpleasant.

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:07 pm

What element are you exactly SC? Some could be saying the same thing about you.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:08 pm

I know some regular sitting back taking jabs. Bet you won’t say it under your real moniker.

you know they won’t….

Celisea…you’re something else chica!! :lol:

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
1:08 pm

I made a very general statement. However, hit dogs do holler.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:08 pm

Cosign Sexy…

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
1:09 pm

Leggs – I have no idea why one would attempt to scare a pregnant women who is clearly close to birthing time. Cruel wicked humor I suppose.

What’s everybody got planned for the weekend? I’m going to hit up the Halloween store to see if I can find me a little summin summin to wear to the cabins for our costume party night. Working a few hours tomorrow afternoon, might grab a drink or two with the girls later and then Sunday I get to pick the beau up from the airport. ;-)

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
1:10 pm

Additionally, I find it quite interesting that you are able to respond to a general statement but not a direct question.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
1:12 pm

Wuuf wuuf…exactly

Sassy – Nope shole (how that for idiotic Markie) won’t. :)

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:13 pm

I really don’t get this multiple screen name conspiracy. If you’re doing that please stop and use one screen name. Just say what you want under your SN or moniker, don’t be weak-sauce.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
1:13 pm

And HST don’t want me to go back a couple of days where he committed a faux pas in dual blogging. I didn’t say anything because it wasn’t worth it. You put it on the sidewalk HST and mystery man, we’ll kick in the street.

How that for trashy and alleybat??

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:15 pm

I have no idea what your talking about but please show it. I have NEVER used another SN.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:16 pm

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:19 pm

I’ve never dual blogged. This is my first blog I’ve read and commented on. Because I’m single and will be for life. I came here to see what is thought by singles. I have no calamitous intent towards anyone or anything ever in life.

FTR, I love the movie Anchorman and thought RB was funny. I have no idea who any of you are.

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:23 pm

I think it was stated earlier here about older people looking pathetic in bars. I agree and unfortunately I am approaching 40. I’ve turned to on-line dating and I swore I’d never do that. I’m just trying to keep up with the times. I was hoping to receive insight from other singles in my city. Some of the off the cuff remarks are funny and keep it fresh out here. Then again, some of the remarks are just meant to be mean. The single life…

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
1:24 pm

What does the HST stand for, if you don’t mind me asking?

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
1:29 pm

@Celisea ~ didn’t we have this convo earlier this week or the ending of last week about the jargon used here. It’s all in fun. Everyone on this blog has a degree of some sort and has passed more than English 101. People need to lighten up. We’re not writing a thesis here.

“…don’t be weak-sauce.” That has got to be one of the corniest phrases I’ve ever heard on BGC. But, it has grown on me

Raqi

October 7th, 2011
1:32 pm

I meet more married women ready to have sex…

You may be right HST. I am married and haven’t had sex in 5 loooooong days, so yeah I may be a little ready. LOL I’ll probably fall asleep in the tub after making dinner, cleaning the kitchen, washing and putting to bed babies, and doing that final load of laundry. But if The Man wants some he stands a good chance of getting it tonight. LOL

Let me stop.

HEY SEXYCOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I pulled up the blog just to say hello to you. Hope all is well.

Celisea, 9 times out of 10 its always the one that you set straight or called out the day before. LOL The other 1 chance is someone that claims to be cool with you under one name but in reality don’t care too much for you so they take those occasion jabs at you as a release to keep up the “fake virtual friendship”.

On topic, don’t go looking for a settled relationship material in a “Girls Gone Wild” and Freaknic environment. What you see is what you are going to be getting.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:33 pm

What’s everybody got planned for the weekend?

I’m meeting some friends at the No Mas Cantina this evening and who knows after that. I don’t know what’s up for tomorrow but I want to get out and go to a good reggae spot and dance ’til my feet hurt. Sunday I’m chilling with my niece & brother and since Monday is a holiday I ain’t doin isht…

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
1:34 pm

Exactly Leggs. That’s someone that THINKS they’ve observed all there is to know about me. They’ve made all sorts of assumptions about me from tidbits but don’t don’t know jack. It’s a freaking blog. I have my wits about me and intelligence in tact all day….because number one I’m a woman, number two a black woman and I must must represent. But that again speaks to people trying understand or have insight into something they natually know nothing about. Anybody reading and “know” can tell the difference in not being able to speak intelligently and speaking colloquially. About as different as night and day. But I can’t explain something to someone they don’t naturally possess.

Alright gotta eat. I’m not even sweating. That’s a wannabe on the outside looking in, wishing they could “get it.”

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:34 pm

Leggs, unfortunately it has on me as well. BGC is so damn funny to me. What are those women (loosely said) thinking? A topic probably best for another day.

No one has figured out my SN. I’ve asked if anyone knows what it means. I figured if posters knew what it was then they’d know I wasn’t the others who bring such suspect to the multiple SN or moniker issue.

No guesses? No ideas really?

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
1:35 pm

Waving frantically, seriously experiencing a case of Rocky Withdrawal.

Me miss you.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:37 pm

That has got to be one of the corniest phrases I’ve ever heard on BGC.

Speaking of BGC did you see the episode where Julie throw milk and cereal on one girl and promptly got a thorugh a$$ whoopin afterwards…

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
1:37 pm

Hello Raqi. Hope all is beautiful with you.

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
1:38 pm

Sassy – Have you ever been to Loca Luna? My cousin and I are trying to find a cool spot to grab drinks at tomorrow evening. I want to say I’ve heard they do free salsa lessons and stuff but wasn’t sure.

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:38 pm

Yes and it was epic. Judi is freakin’ nuts!

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
1:38 pm

Exactly Raqi Mark you can hit me up on the side, I have no problem setting you straight and settlling your wonderment in my personal life….whether not someone is available for my dusting :)

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:39 pm

it ain’t that deep…let the air out…

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
1:40 pm

We hope you can stick around….Raqi

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
1:41 pm

watch out these girls think they’re witty and their crap doesn’t stink

HST – How about we KNOW we are witty and well, errbody’s crap stank!LOL!!

Exiled – You know exactly what this topic is about. Nobody said you had to have your spouse joined to the hip. Time on your own, with interests and friends of your own, keeps things fresh. We are talking about folks that are acting SWM – single while married. There is a difference. But you are right, each couple has to “do them”.

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
1:42 pm

Hot Source Tomatoes?

thats it?

and what does BGC mean?

SexxyCool/Raqi?

so is ur virtual friendship fake too?

I wonder wonder!

But I hate folks who are spineless and are ‘castrated’ and ‘censored’ coz somehow the think they ‘know folks on a blog!

Really!!???

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
1:42 pm

Sassy – My bestie and I would always go to Vibes off Glenwood…But beware, those guys are A G G R E S S I V E lol…I love to ‘whine it up’ :oops:

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:42 pm

Celisea you damned sure dusting ‘em like an old a$$ rug chile!

SlimUno Loca Luna is nice…I heard they give out free salsa lessons but I don’t know how often. I think you and your friends would like it.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
1:43 pm

@SassyMe ~ this season is truly wack. Of course no one is a lady on this show, but these girls are beyond stupid. Judy needs theraphy and AA. She’s a hot mess. They beat her down to the ground!

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
1:43 pm

Raqi

October 7th, 2011
1:43 pm

SexyCool, I miss talking to yall too but I had to come to grips with I was hanging out here too much. There a things that I should have been doing that blogging was keeping me from doing.

I don’t how but I deleted my gmail account and lost all of you all email addresses. I told myself maybe it was for the good being that I did not need the distraction (not said in a bad way) with a new tiny little fragile baby coming home. He was on oxygen when he came home so I was sleeping with one eye open on him and had him in sight at all times.

I do think about yall and always hope things are going good for everyone.

You be good. :wink:

HST

October 7th, 2011
1:45 pm

Raqi, if it’s only been 5 days and you have all that going on, my married buddies could use some tips. You sound like a good wife and dedicated mother. Such a rare quality these days.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
1:47 pm

No worries. We have always be/will always be good. It is totally understood. And if you need to, you can always get to me at ThreeWordsDaily.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
1:48 pm

have always BEEN/will always be

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
1:48 pm

Exiled – Did you see the one that came at me the other day? Said I was very, very mean spirited and that I absolutely refused to listen to anyone other than myself? LOL!! I got such a good laugh about that, I told hubby about it!!

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
1:48 pm

How’s little man doing? If you care not to answer, I understand.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
1:50 pm

Raqi – I understand completely. If you get to SCool, she will pass along my email addy.

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
1:54 pm

Kimmie?

those are weak folks who don’t have an argument of their own.

I hope,for the sake of manhood,that wasn’t a man.

I may be wrong.

But if that was a man Kimmie,let him be gay! :lol:

I be aaaight with that.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
1:58 pm

Exiled – They just referred to themself as Duluth. But you know I had a smarta$$ comeback: “Since I’m the best thing since sliced bread, why wouldn’t I only listen to myself?” :lol:

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
1:59 pm

Judy needs theraphy and AA. She’s a hot mess.

Leggs she needs something ’cause baby gurl ain’t right in the head. I saw a preview and Stasi is tired of her drunken behavior…they’re gonna target her next to get booted from the house.

Raqi

October 7th, 2011
2:02 pm

Quickly…

SexyCool, my promise still stands. You know what I am talking about.

Hey Leggs. He is doing good. We have finally gotten to where Liz is not trying to “get rid of him” out of jealousy. Now she tries to play with him which I think is even more dangerous. LOL She is always wanting to put one of her large stuffed animals in his bassinet or hold him like he’s her doll or something.

She had nothing to be jealous about. She has had her dad to give her attention. Mase wouldn’t hold him that much at first because he was so tiny so she and he would just hang out together and leave me to tend to the little man alone.

Kimmie, thanks. And will do.

See this thing is addicting. LOL I have to go. You all be good.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:05 pm

I missed out on the good wings…dernit

HST

October 7th, 2011
2:05 pm

I will be doing a track day this weekend testing my new track car. I’m really excited about it, I’ve been overseeing the build for 3 months. Time to dial it in!

Sunday, as usual I’ll be shopping & dining downtown. I definitely will be at Buckhead Dinnner for breakfast. I’m craving Fogo De Chao really bad but my GF could have other ideas about our dining. Either way a day at the malls should have us ready to eat.

EVERYONE have a great weekend and enjoy themselves.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
2:10 pm

Glad all is well with you and the fam Raqi!!

HST

October 7th, 2011
2:10 pm

HST = Health, Sciences and Technology

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:12 pm

Hugs and smooches to the little ones…Raqi

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
2:13 pm

Thanks, Raqi. I was wondering how Liz was handling things. I wish all you the best. Stay strong!!

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
2:13 pm

@HST?

other ideas?

I thought u said u don’t compromise?

But fogo

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
2:14 pm

but For go de chao is my joint

Next time we meet there maybe I’ll be with a new girl!

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
2:16 pm

Excuse me,U’ll be not I’ll be

HST

October 7th, 2011
2:16 pm

That’s not really compromising Exiled, that’s being .5 of the equation.

“but fogo” what do you mean by that?

HST

October 7th, 2011
2:18 pm

Too funny.

I dine at Fogo a lot which is why my GF might not wanna go.

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
2:19 pm

Is there any particular chic on here that u like,HST?

what’s ur email add?

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
2:21 pm

I’ve never been to Fogo but the beau said he likes it. I am just not that big of an eater to spend that type of money to not eat. I would love to at least try it out once though. I had just mentioned it to him today since i’m getting a bit of OT for a project we’ve been working on at work. Told him I’d take him out for a nice dinner ;-)

Randyt (aka...DON'T HAVE ONE OF THESE T SHIRTS)

October 7th, 2011
2:22 pm

AWWW Raqi, once again you remind me just how bad my marriage was. I doubt she would have noticed it had been awhile until she realized several birthdays and anniversarys had rolled around. Five days, I’d have been lucky if she noticed in five months…been trying for eleven years now but still am nowhere near caught up ;-) I’d have to do two and three a days for the rest of my life to be batting .500.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:25 pm

Randyt – Any upates on the new lady?

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:25 pm

Is there any particular chic on here that u like,HST?

That’s funny because I thought it was a woman…lol

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:26 pm

Slim – I’ve not been either & would like to go. Try it out for lunch and then you would not have to spend as much.

Randyt (aka...DON'T HAVE ONE OF THESE T SHIRTS)

October 7th, 2011
2:31 pm

Hi Celisea…took her to the airport this afternoon so she could fly to NY to see her daughter. Could have been some time to bring things back a little but as ususal my daughter had an emergency that I ahd to deal with. Kind of awkward but I think we are going to go away for a weekend and turn our moth*&^&**&g cell phones off and try to bring things back from the abyss.

abc

October 7th, 2011
2:31 pm

I call it Go Fo Da Chow. Even though the food and service was really pretty good, I was most impressed by all the really fat people that camped out in there for (apparently) hours, eating enough for 4 people each. The joint is a fatso’s paradise. Not quite worth the dough, though, IMHO.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:33 pm

Okay 6 wings will NOT get it for me today. Great…all I need is a reason to eat snacks. :(

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
2:36 pm

Afternoon Folks:
The phantoms have dropped in, that’s a usual thing latley. It seem like a day reckoning should be in order for folks who have multi moniker disorder.

If a woman wants to party, more than spend time with me I’ll tell her go ahead I’ll be fine. I know how to party too and mine could last longer. Since our party together never got off the ground it’s over for both of us.

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
2:36 pm

kimmie – good point, thanks ;-)

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:38 pm

Anyone been to SmashBurger? There are only 3 in town – Windward, Johns Creek & Buckhead. They are a diet buster, but great! The olive oil, rosemary & garlic Smash fries are to die for! I am going to try the sweet potato ones next along with my Smashburger. I may try the grilled chicken sandwich too & I heard the salads are huge.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
2:40 pm

SlimGoody – the whole Brazilian steakhouse experience is not really compatible to my dining habits/needs.

abc – To me, it’s the same premise as a Golden Corral/Ryan’s. Eat ’til you’re stuffed. Sit around. Let some of it digest. Rinse. Repeat. (Just doesn’t make for a pleasant dining experience.)

Although, I have to say, their grilled meats are very well done.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
2:40 pm

@Randyt ~ pardon my ignorance for the moment, my mind ain’t right. Are you saying you and your daughter will be turing off the phones working on your relationship with each other over the bickering re: gf or are you going to NY with gf where you will turn off your phones. Wait, is turning off the phones a figure of speech because I can’t imagine either one of you with children turning off your phones.

I need a drank…..

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:41 pm

I’ve been wanting some flared jeans. They have some really cute ones on sale at, of all places, Old Navy. I normally can’t wear their stuff, but got a black and a dark blue pair for $15 a piece and they fit nice!

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
2:41 pm

Lady’s I found y’all have a good plan when things go wack on here. And it’s a good one shut the mutha down…….LOL

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:43 pm

I need a drank…..

LOL…that was funny

I definitely CAN’T do the Golden Corral…ugh Just the thought of bellies hanging over the tables makes me….ugh

My kid was begging to have the experience and I kept telling her it was crappy in there. Noooo all her friends go so I took her and upon entering she wasn’t exactly thrilled. We ate there so she won’t ask again:)

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
2:44 pm

” know how to party too and mine could last longer” :lol: :lol: :lol:

Whatcha talking about Willis? :lol:

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:45 pm

Hey there Blackfoote. When did you get in?

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:47 pm

Celisea – My boss calls Golden Corral the Golden Troughth! But kids love that place!

SlimUno

October 7th, 2011
2:48 pm

I would just hate to go some place like that knowing I can’t eat that much at one time but that’s his thing. Even when he grills he’ll get hamburgers, hot dogs, chicken, bratwursts and maybe some steaks and I’m sitting here thinking, who else is coming over since it’s just the two of us. LOL!

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
2:48 pm

@Celisea/SexyC ~ I can’t do an all you can eat lunch/dinner buffet either. I rarely go back for seconds.

And, why are the biggest people in Ryans/Golden Corral????

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:49 pm

SCool – There is a cousin of Fogo near us called Sal Grosso. We went a few years ago on my birthday. Places like that are a little much for me, but they had some of the best black beans you could put over rice. I could have stopped at the black beans! Had some good grilled fish they brought around on the skewers too, so I did not do too bad.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:50 pm

Kimmie – Golden Troughth…LOL Mighty right about that.

I’ve decided….I’m getting my kid a small flat screen for her room and a new bed for Christmas.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
2:50 pm

Hi Celisea I just rolled in.
I was tickled believing I was blocked/blindsided yesterday thought I said something wrong and WD took me out with the rest of the phantoms……LOL

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:51 pm

Slim – Your man sounds like mine.

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
2:51 pm

Leggs – Randy’s daughter is an adult with a college degree and a job search. :)

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:51 pm

Leggs – I don’t either. Just let me go and place my order. I don’t need to go back over and over and over… Just order enough to make it suffice. That’s just greedy.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:53 pm

Blackfoote – I was tickled believing I was blocked/blindsided yesterday thought I said something wrong and WD took me out with the rest of the phantoms……

Really? Naaaah, just the nincompoops, idiots and haters

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
2:53 pm

Sometimes, I am amazed at how much TheDude can eat. (lol)

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:54 pm

Celisea/Leggs – That’s why Americans are so big and diabetes is rampant. Our portions are 2 or 3 times that of other nations that are slimmer and have fewer health issues.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:54 pm

Joke someone just sent me:

If you can’t afford a doctor, go to an airport you’ll get a free x-ray and breast exam and if you mention Al Qaeda, you’ll get a free colonoscopy….

LOL

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
2:55 pm

Kimmie I like flared jeans but I think I’m too short for those…I’m 5″3′ and have yet to find a pair I like and that likes me back..

And it’s a good one shut the mutha down

Blackfoote that’s what happens when you’re a NMF(Non Muthaf!@#$ng Factor) :lol:

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
2:55 pm

Heeey Leggs:
When the party is more entertaining than I, I will check myself and if I check allright there is no remorse.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:57 pm

Exactly Kimmie. I was reading an article that spoke to obesity. Talking about how years ago even to eating fast foods the portions were much smaller. Think about it…with a meal comes a burger, fries size that’s double over the years and what a 32 ounce coke. As opposed to a handful of fries and a 8 – 12 ounce soda some 20 years ago. Makes sense. To think folks are geting 2 and 3 ff meals a day.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
2:58 pm

Sassy – I thought I might be a little short for them as well, 5′5″ plus I’m curvy. But I found some in a darker wash & the black ones, and I tried them on with a chunky higher heel and they worked!

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:58 pm

doubled not double…thanks Mark

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
2:58 pm

As a griller,

Signed the paperwork, bought the grill same day, you cook all that meat for the days you want BBQ and don’t wanna fire up the grill.

Sheeiiit I know I’ve cooked a good 40 pounds of meat in the last 2 months, with 10 sitting the deep freezer – waiting to be thawed…know what I’m eating tonight.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
2:59 pm

I love grilled food but I can only eat it a couple of days (really as with most foods). After two days I’m burned out.

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
3:01 pm

Dan – You are so right about that. He says hey while the grill is hot, may as well throw these hot dogs & chicken on for another day.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:02 pm

@SC ~ I realize that, but still wouldn’t turn my phone off for the entire weekend. Emergencies do occur.

I’m always amazed as to how much men can eat. It can be mind blowing at times.

“….that’s what happens when you’re a NMF(Non Muthaf!@#$ng Factor)!” YES INDEED….best line of the day!

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
3:03 pm

Dan grilled is the way to go, I’ll grill in rain, sleet, or snow.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
3:04 pm

I might try that out Kimmie…Old Navy is having a sale so I might go to the one off of Mt. Zion road tomorrow…

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:04 pm

We shut THEM down yesterday!!! Well, WD shut THEM down.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
3:05 pm

We Zaning today?

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:06 pm

Roll it Sassy

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:06 pm

@SassyMe ~ “zaning ” popped in my head while getting ready for work this morning.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
3:07 pm

I knew it y’all got the Power……LOL

kimmie

October 7th, 2011
3:11 pm

I’m about to hit the road!

It’s been a rather pleasant blog day, gang! Hope you all have a fabulous weekend, do what you want!

Be easy!

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

October 7th, 2011
3:13 pm

Reason #76 that I love my job,

Sitting here writing a report playing PYT on the iPhone (RIP Steve Jobs) and jamming….with less than 30 minutes left….

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
3:13 pm

I’m gone too y’all be good and I will try. Have a great weekend everybody.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:15 pm

As Mark and I sat in the moonlight, strattled on Mark’s thunderous thighs while exploring one another’s love, I could feel the enormous swell of manhood underneath my bottom

alright Blackfoote you got it…show Mark what to do

Raqi

October 7th, 2011
3:15 pm

Hey Randy, how’s it going?

Yeah 5 days. Sunday nights just seem to be the evenings to get it some private time in these days.

When you have one baby hanging onto your nipple and another hanging onto your leg which seems to be all the time now, private time is not as plentiful as once was. Sundays are usually pretty calm and we get to bed early. Other than that it’s a quickie here and there or in the place of something else. LOL

Heck I can’t deny that I haven’t used “private time” as a bargaining tool sometime within the past 2 months.

Me: We can do it tonight if you take care of the babies while you watch MNF so I can have dinner with Doc while her husband is out of town.

Him: :neutral:

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:16 pm

Dedicated to Mark :)

For Real

October 7th, 2011
3:23 pm

For Real now slapping the ish out of Raqi cause he miss her!!!

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:24 pm

Blackfoote? Whatcha gonna do? Or did you scurry? LOL

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

October 7th, 2011
3:28 pm

Came Back Only For You Celisea:
Mark got up in a bit of a fright, I said to him you should have got that tonight. He said please Blackfoote don’t tell the gang, I failed to go out with a bang. Don’t worry I said you blew it this time, move out the way and let me try mine. He wiped the sweat from above his brow and told me thank cause he didn’t know how.

I’m gone y’all have a good one.

Hello Raqi V:

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:28 pm

He left 2 mins before your post, Celisea.

Raqi

October 7th, 2011
3:29 pm

Thank you For Real. LOL

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:29 pm

Oops, he’s back.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:29 pm

LOLOLOLOL

LOVE IT BLACKFOOTE…..Good one!!!!

SexyCool

October 7th, 2011
3:29 pm

LMAO….Blackfoote is Dr. Seuss!!!

Raqi

October 7th, 2011
3:30 pm

Howdy Blackfoote.

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:30 pm

I’m laughing out loud….FOR REAL….AND Da man is still here…

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:31 pm

Well, if that’s not a pluck on Mark’s forehead, I don’t know what is (lol).

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:32 pm

Leggs – Stooooop….LOLOLOLOL

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:33 pm

@Celisea ~ who expected that from BF…that was funny. A may byt*ched slapped another man :lol:

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
3:33 pm

A man byt*ched slapped another man….

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
3:34 pm

I tell ya Legs, didn’t know he had it in him. Sweetly done.

BlackMagicWoman

October 7th, 2011
3:53 pm

Chiming in late as hell from the Rotten Apple! What’s up folks?

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
3:54 pm

Today was anything but good at work and I couldn’t wait to get out of there. Time was crawling by and I had a three day weekend coming that I was anxious to get started since my fiance and I just gotten engaged and I wanted to celebrate…only with him. He must’ve been thinking the same thing ’cause he texted me saying, “I’ve got a surprise for you”, so you already know the last hour of the day seemed like four. When I got home, there were the biggest bouquet of pink roses I’d ever seen on the table along with a beautiful card. I noticed large red arrows on the floor and followed them to my bedroom…where I found a pretty strapless pink dress along with accessories and a FIERCE pair of pumps. A note next to it read,”Go ‘head n get pretty Pretty and I’ll oick you up at 8″.

I gave myself a once over in the mirror and liked what I saw..and as soon as I heard my doorbell ring I squealed in delight. When I opened the door there he was smiling at me and looking good enough to eat. He’d gotten us a limo and took me to the Sun Dial…our favorite spot. After dinner we took a long limo ride around the town as we sipped champagne and got a lil flirty with each other. “I’m hungry” he said but I looked at him and said,”We just ate”, and he replied, “That’s not what I’m talking about eating”. I felt a warm flush rush over me as he slid my g-strings down and motioned for me to sit on his….face. All I can say is thank goodness it was a stretch limo and the driver couldn’t hear or see us. My leggs were shaking like jello by the time we got back to his place and after he tipped the limo driver(who happened to be a good friend of his)we damn near ran into the house. We barely made it into the foyer when…

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:07 pm

Silly arse me. I’m over here jumping for joy that SassyMe got engaged so quickly. I sho fargot we were Zaning….

We barely made it into the foyer when I had to get some right then and there. I slowly let my fingers massage his manhood while I wrapped my right leg around his waist. I started thrusting and grinding, kissing him ever so passionately. I nibbled his ear then whispered, wait right here. I have something for you…..

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:15 pm

I’m over here jumping for joy that SassyMe got engaged so quickly. I sho fargot we were Zaning….

:lol:

awww how cute Leggs…

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
4:16 pm

now I am wide awake ;-) carry on!

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:19 pm

I saunter back to the foyer with a blanket, fruit and honey. I unbutton his shirt, licking his chest from neck down to his navel. I ask him to lay down. He takes off his pants. I dim the hallway lights all while I’m pouring honey over his chest. I lick as much of it off with my tongue as I possibly can. He’s moaning and I’m liking the sound of it. I put his shaft in my mouth where is quivering is more palpable. As he releases himself he smiles at me. I lay on my back taking a piece of fruit and dipping it in the honey…I place a piece of it in me asking him to eat it for me….He……

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:21 pm

you should contribute as well exiled..it’s more fun when the guys chip in,too…

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:23 pm

now would be a good start exiled…i’m calling you out…you talk alot of sh!t so back it up.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:25 pm

@SassyMe ~ not only that I’m thinking “Damn I want a dude to do that for me, have a dress and a pair of pumps waiting for me with a note sayiing what time he’s coming to pick me up. I finally realized I was caught up in your fantasy which I thought was real (lol)….

Exiled!

October 7th, 2011
4:25 pm

Lol

I’m in a meeting

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:28 pm

Punk move….Ex

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:33 pm

Punk is as it does…now I remembered why I usually skim over their posts or ig them all together :lol:

I finally realized I was caught up in your fantasy which I thought was real

Leggs I was thinking about the movie “Pretty Woman” and typed what came to mind…I was also thinking about the episode of “Single Ladies” when ole dude gave Stacy’s character a bath and put her to bed…

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:35 pm

So you mean to tell me there aren’t any blog guys who aren’t afraid to stop lurking and add some spice to these last few minutes here?!

Oh well…

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
4:36 pm

Let me just say this has been an interesting blog week.

If you want to convert from troll to regular, kill the sniper moves, grab a moniker and join in the fun.

If you don’t want us to get specific to race, don’t bring it here.

If you don’t want to find out how deadly the MOD SQUAD can be and bring it, don’t start nothing.

If you can’t take it don’t dish first. No back pedaling, you put it out there it’s on HST…you back pedaled twice this week.

Please learn and understand the sort of dialog we have here. This is not grammar or high school nor college. We like to kick back and let it flow…if you don’t “get it” ask first.

And Don’t EVER get it twisted for that I’ll say:

Don’t let the smooth taste fool you :)

Diva didn’t give me permission but I’m just saying.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:37 pm

@SassyMe ~ I was thinking about myself (lololol).

Celisea

October 7th, 2011
4:37 pm

Carry on Zane Girls/Guys :)

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:43 pm

Leggs I was kinda thinking about myself,too…I would love for that to happen to me!

Celisea I guess this chapter will have to wait til whenever as Leggs and I are the only ones contributing…no biggie.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:50 pm

Have a grrreat weekend blog!!

peace…

BlackMagicWoman

October 7th, 2011
4:51 pm

SASSY..congrats girl! Your boo needs to give some guys tips and classes on being romantic. Some think it’s for pansies…..but NEWSFLASH we don’t see you as less of a man. In fact it makes you more of a man because you are not trying to be hard (macho). You put it all out on the line without playing games! Now DAT’S a real man! Girl where did you find him in ATL? Because it’s plenty a frogs and not enough princes. Now there are lots of Princesses though! :lol:

You should write erotic short stories girl as a side gig. Your name could be “Sassy Jenkins”! :lol: They would for sho’ know you were a permanent wearer of the “brown suit”! :lol:

BlackMagicWoman

October 7th, 2011
4:53 pm

LEGGS & SASSY..I can add to the book with stories of me and my ex with our “Vehicular BJs, C00chie snacks and down right freakiness”! I think there is a permanent gear shift make in my back! :lol:

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:54 pm

No Black Magic I didn’t get engaged…sometimes on Friday’s we write our own version of The Zane Chronicles and this was my chapter.

I like your suggestion about a side gig…gotta look into that.

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:54 pm

@BMW ~ the man is a figment (not the Blog’s Figment lolol) of her imagination (lol). I see you got fooled like I did.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:55 pm

I think there is a permanent gear shift make in my back!

That’s what we’re talking ’bout right there!!!

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:56 pm

Next Friday Black Magic you’ve gotta add your chapter ;-)

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed ;-)

October 7th, 2011
4:56 pm

Okay the No Mas Cantina calls….

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:57 pm

BMW ~ the next poster is to pick up where the last sentence leaves off. We only do this on Fridays and not every Friday. It was weak today since only 2 posted. Girl, I have no doubt your stories will fog up our computer screens (LOLOLOL)….

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:57 pm

We will continue with “The Engagment” next Friday. I’ve saved the 3 sections….until then.

PEACE!

Leggs

October 7th, 2011
4:58 pm

Oh, we may need to invest in some bibs for Exiled….and some vaseline so he can take care of himself at his desk!

BlackMagicWoman

October 7th, 2011
4:59 pm

Well see I’ve been gone a minute. Ok…Im on the same page now! :lol:

SlimUno

October 8th, 2011
9:55 am

Hello, hello, hello….anybody in here?

HST

October 8th, 2011
3:45 pm

Not every one eats to be gluttonous at FoGo’s. The service is just about unparelled in the ATL. I can’t believe anyone would use Golden Coral and FoGo’s as a comparison or in the same sentence. Social retards.

Obesity is rampant in the US and it doesn’t take an all you eat anything to be obese or even fat.

HST

October 8th, 2011
3:52 pm

In case you women didn’t know, you shut yourselves down also. Moreover, WD said she didn’t mean to shut down posting. So I’m not sure what y’all think you accomplished. Instead y’all sound like a bunch of bitter women who can’t stand not to have their way.