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Archive for September, 2011

Let’s be clear: We are dating!

As tricky as dating can be, you would think the easy part would be knowing whether or not you are in fact..dating. This is actually not always easy to figure out!

While some people devote significant time and effort to seeing one person, if that person doesn’t consider that dating, problems could arise. This can become especially frustration if you are seeing a person a couple of nights a week or talking to them all the time, and they think you are just “hanging out” or my personal favorite “kicking it”.

So here’s the thing, being friends is great and all but if we are spending time with one another with intentions of exploring a relationship, we are dating.

If you aren’t really interested or are not sure if you’re interested, it’s good to let the person know that. Especially during that period of time before things are serious. There is nothing more frustrating then devoting time to someone, only to find out you two are just hanging out.

What do you when you aren’t clear …

Continue reading Let’s be clear: We are dating! »

Should courting make a comeback?

I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news, people. Apparently, that thing single people do with each other is not courting. You can blame it on friends with benefits, hooking up on the first date, and technology. These are a few of the things that get in the way of good old fashioned courting.

I was at a taping of a new show, Verses and Flow, that is going to be airing soon, hosted by Hill Harper. I was chatting with a photographer who was an older gentleman. He mentioned that his son should have been there to meet a nice lady. He said he has tried to show his son that courting a woman is still necessary.

I began to think about the last couple of times I met a guy and how he asked me out. How we communicated and how things got started. Things have changed since the days of courting, but so much else has too. Should courting make a comeback? Is there room for courting? Are there benefits to it?

What do you think the difference is between courting and dating? Or is there …

Continue reading Should courting make a comeback? »

Have a bad dating record?

Some of us have a laundry list of romantic crimes we aren’t proud of. Heaven knows I’ve had my share of misadventures when I was the culprit/perpetrator.

I always hope that the bad dating karma won’t catch up to me, but honestly I’m prepared for that to happen. All I can do is be honest with my guy about the mistakes I made and prove that I learned my lesson.

Do you find that it is difficult living down a bad dating rap?

What would you do if the person you are dating discovered something awful from your relationship past?

When it comes to a bad dating record, should we have to answer for it with the person we are currently seeing?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Have a bad dating record? »

Dating the date juggler?

My friend David met a really great girl but he has already decided to move on. He found out that she is “in demand” and gets asked out quite a lot. Apparently, this is a deal breaker?

I asked him why would he give up so easily. He’s no slouch and he could easily “compete” for her affections. He said that he is no interested in doing so. Call it ego, or just knowing he has a boatload of options himself. He doesn’t date the date juggler.

I am not sure how he knows how many guys the young girl was seeing. I wonder why do we need to be the only one a person is dating? If you are single and exploring your options, should you really be penalized for that?

How many prospects should you try to take on at one time in dating?

Would it bother you if you went out with someone and you were their second date or meet up of the day?

Do you think a single person who juggles a bunch of dates is a deal breaker?

What do you do if you are seeing someone you connect with and you want them to …

Continue reading Dating the date juggler? »

Would you convert for love?

As if dating isn’t tricky enough, many of us have to figure how to handle differences in religion. If religion is important to you, it is a great idea to find out if you there are any conflicts in beliefs.

I have watched a lot of couples struggle with a difference in religions and sometimes it is something they can’t really get past. I think things are a lot easier when one converts to the religion of their mate. Is it too much to ask someone to do, though?

Would you ever date someone who had different religious beliefs? Would you dump someone because of it?

Have you ever thought about converting to a different religion for the sake of a relationship? Would you be opposed to it?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Would you convert for love? »

It’s date night (You need a plan)

When you have a date scheduled, it’s always great to have a plan. It’s cool to be all laid back but if you expect to have a good time, even spontaneity has its limitations.

For the record guys, women love men with a plan. It shows that he thinks of her as someone special! When you show little effort in getting a date plan together, you could come across as uninterested.

What is a good plan to have? Location, activities, and time to actually talk. First dates should involve ample time to check out if you have chemistry.

When you want to impress your date, what kind of plans do you make?

Would you stop seeing someone if their date plan leave something to be desired?

Continue reading It’s date night (You need a plan) »

Dating: Do you ask about their finances?

What would you do if the person you are dating are showing signs of financial instability? Maybe you notice their lack of frugality or their excessive spending. Or maybe you are with them when their credit card was declined.

I read somewhere about a young woman who was on a first date with a guy and his card was declined. She didn’t judge him by this incident and they are now married. If she dumped him because of this embarrassing snafu, she could have thrown away her chance of happiness!

So what is the best approach in paying attention to your date’s money management? Is it something you should inquire about? If you notice something awry, do you bring it up?

Do you (or should you) ask about a person’s financial plan when you are dating? Should you wait until you are in a relationship to bring it up or would that be too late?

How important is it to date someone who is smart about money?

Just curious: What would you do if you went on a date and their credit card was …

Continue reading Dating: Do you ask about their finances? »

Wanted: Housewife in Atlanta

A friend of mine just got engaged and her fiance asked her to work on ending her career. She loves him very much but said that she is having a hard time wrapping her mind around the concept of housewife.

She fears her existence will become about shopping and domestic work. Clearly her idea of housewife is a bit distorted. I wondered why being a housewife seems so unappealing to women today?

Although my mother was a career woman, she seemed to enjoy caring for the family and my Dad. The thought of being a stay at home Mom or housewife sounds pretty awesome to me, personally. I believe there can be joy found in having a career or being a housewife.

What do you think of the idea of a woman leaving her career to please her husband? Is it unfair for men to want a housewife?

Guys, would you ever ask or want your wife to leave her job or career? What if she really enjoyed working?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Wanted: Housewife in Atlanta »

Tough guys can’t show affection?

Call it one of those mars/venus conundrums: Women like strong men and they love affection. Trying to get affection from said strong man isn’t easy. Do you have to give up affection to be with the strong, alpha man type?

I received an email from a young lady who is happy with her “tough guy” but is not used to being in a relationship with no affection. I don’t believe that you can never expect anyone – especially men to change. The only thing you can do is let them know what bothers you and hope they care enough to compromise.

Guys are you a fan of affection or is it something that is difficult to give? Is it unfair to expect a guy who is tough and manly to be affectionate? In your opinion, tough guys can’t or won’t show affection?

Ladies have you ever dated someone who showed no affection until it was time to have sex? Did it bother you? How did you handle it?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Tough guys can’t show affection? »

Dating Intentions: Good will hunting

If we could buy a crystal ball that could predict if the person we are dating is a colossal waste of time, I think many of us would invest. The money would be well spent because we would know whose intentions were honorable.

Sometimes we use our own logic, deductive reasoning, or intuition to determine intent. There are times, though, when it is simply impossible to know of someone’s intentions when you first meet them.

So for all of the dating veterans out there, how do you know when a person is truly interested in getting to know you?

What do you listen or pay attention to when it comes to figuring out if they just want sex, money, or ego boost?

Happy Friday, everyone!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Dating Intentions: Good will hunting »