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Ex-Files: Who is your Kryptonite?

Most of us have dated enough people to have found their personal kryptonite. That one person who renders us stupid, powerless, and unable to make rational choices when they are around.

I had one and I am convinced he no longer has that power over me. It helps that I changed phone numbers, office locations, and I no longer see any mutual friends. But whatever. The point is, I can pretty much relax about him since he won’t pop up anywhere.

It’s strange how these people even get this kind of influence over us. It can be sex-induced, love-induced, or perhaps a mixture of both. Once you figure out how they became your kryptonite, you should be able to combat it.

Who is your kryptonite and why? What was it about them that made you a big pile of confusion?

What do you do to break the spell of people who have you feeling caught up and in a daze?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

288 comments Add your comment

nokiddingsherlock

September 30th, 2011
7:00 am

what you call kryptonite, i call ‘falling in love’.

Mike in Marietta

September 30th, 2011
7:12 am

Girls… yuk! ;)

Matt

September 30th, 2011
7:17 am

My Kryptonite…….Don’t think I got one on this

Carrie

September 30th, 2011
7:32 am

GM, like you WD I had one but his powers of control no longer work.

Krypto Girl

September 30th, 2011
7:54 am

I never had one, but I AM Kryptonite for a few men out there (’_^)…

CoolShadow

September 30th, 2011
8:15 am

Who is your kryptonite and why? What was it about them that made you a big pile of confusion?

No one currently but there has been several women who have had that power over me, don’t know why it was them or how they obtained it, but they had it. This is a good example of je ne sais quoi. There’s an actress that might have it over me. Don’t know why she does but I’m concered that should I get the chance to meet her that I could lose composure. Not because it would be a celebrity/groupie scenario, but she got “that thing”, whatever it is. Or I might just conclude she’s not really all that…

What do you do to break the spell of people who have you feeling caught up and in a daze?

If the opportunity presents itself, I step to them and let them know there’s an attraction, just not the extent. If something flourishes, great. If not, it eventually evolves into an unrequited crush and dissipates over time. Not many things worse than having someone be your kryptonite and then try to use their powers against you in an evil fashion.

Lucinda

September 30th, 2011
8:30 am

Enter your comments here

Lucinda

September 30th, 2011
8:32 am

Morning, friday!

My kryptonite was totally because of good d#*k. Seriously. He had mad skillz and it made me crazy.

With my current love (the white boy!), I waited a long long time before I let him get it, so I have more perspective. The d is excellent, but I won’t ever let it rule me again.

might be a little crude, but hey, im just answering the question.

Leggs

September 30th, 2011
8:55 am

Good morning, Good morning!

Ummmm, I’ve been kryptonite for a few, but I can’t recall anyone driving me crazy when I’m around them. Guess because I was married for so long and now single for quite some time. Haven’t encountered my Superman just yet….but, he’s flying to me. Air traffic is probably slowing him up.

Carrie

September 30th, 2011
9:00 am

@Lucinda – I feel ya! The only thing better than good dy*ck is good head. lol

SlimNu

September 30th, 2011
9:10 am

Good morning,

Um…i’m having a hard time coming up with someone who had me going crazy full of confusion around them.

Leggs

September 30th, 2011
9:35 am

Me too, SlimNu. I did speak on here where I nearly lost my mind after sexing this dude I’ve been wanting to get with for years. The anticipation and the sex nearly blew my mind. It took me sometime to recover (lol). But that was only that one time and that was many years ago. Just adding fodder to the conversation since people seem to be knocked out by their own kryptonite and not responding…

Lucinda

September 30th, 2011
9:38 am

Leggs Look outside! There’s Superman, flying your way

Lucinda

September 30th, 2011
9:38 am

Carrie gotta give some to get some… hahahah

kimmie

September 30th, 2011
9:39 am

Morning All!

I wouldn’t say that past dude was Krytonite for me, but he did have me a tad stupid. What broke the spell was when I found out he stole from me and planted a stalker virus on my computer. Those were the last straw. Have not spoken to him since. He called a year later and left a message on my voicemail – just as I was headed out the door to my 1st date with my now husband!

SexyCool

September 30th, 2011
9:43 am

I have two people that used to be kryptonite. They are not anymore. Thankfully.

Coincidentally, I was just ruminating the other day about the fact that TheDude has a friend who has just moved to Atlanta and is pretty much ALWAYS at our house and he is the physical type that USED to be my weakness (6′6″, basketball build, think Dwight Howard, very attractive). As it stands, he’s just our buddy, Chad. As soon as he finds a job, he will be a good catch, because he really is a decent guy.

Anteeways…said all of that to say that TheDude is the only one that gets my juices flowing…because my juices don’t flow on physical attraction alone and because what he and I have is way too good to let anything distract me.

ITL – I was gone by the time you asked your question regarding whether or not I am a Herbie fan. I was actually just trying to find out about College GameDay because I wanted to make sure that IF they come TheDude doesn’t miss it this year like he did last year. He didn’t even know they were in town until the show was almost over. (We DVR it. Had slept late that morning and by the time we got up and turned the television on to watch, the show was almost over.)

abc

September 30th, 2011
9:43 am

What you call kryptonite, I call middle school.

Celisea

September 30th, 2011
9:44 am

Morning morning morning,

This should be fun :)

Kryptonite you say? Yes, had one. I think he thought he the powers that be I guess after settling into a certain place after with me say 6 or 7 years into and tried to pull a little stunt. Little did he know….one thing about me…I WILL WALK. I couldn’t go back on my word could I?

Anyway he was (not sure if still is) my kryptonite. We had a thing thang that was so powerful. He knew me VERY well, what to do, what to say, how to make me happy, how to keep my happy, how to treat a lady. Laughed at all my jokes, actually laughed I’d say mabye 90% of the time we were together. A VERY skilled lover. After the split, I’d venture to say he spent a couple of years trying to get it back. I avoided him during that time because I knew I was still in the “make me grow weak in the knees” phase. Last year he sent a message asking if we could meet, that it’s important to stay friends and to talk through the issue. I wanted so so so so badly to give in but I dunno, I just didn’t respond. He lives near me and we crossed (car) paths a couple of weeks ago. He stayed a good ways back but I saw him driving behind me keeping distance before turning off. It was funny to see him pacing himself. The last time he did that I turned into a driveway and he HAD to drive past me…LOL That was fuuuuuneee. Yes, this is the one that right after splits, I was at Publix, looked up to find him standing about a about a foot in front of me. Wanted to “have the talk there” but I was like, gotta go (after an hour him explaining and people looking at us). I dunno, I still think about him every now and then. I ain’t gonna lie, if he popped up or by chance had an encounter, if he asked to “talk” I probably would.

Yep my ONLY kryptonite.

Lucinda

September 30th, 2011
9:45 am

SexyCool what he and I have is way too good to let anything distract me.

amen

Celisea

September 30th, 2011
9:46 am

Okay my first paragraph should say I guess after settling into a certain place with me after 6 or 7 years. Sorry I was eating oatmeal and doing my training.

Celisea

September 30th, 2011
9:47 am

And it’s funny because he was NEVER my type but was one persistant dude. How can you not love a man like that?

SlimNu

September 30th, 2011
9:50 am

Leggs – I would classify that as simply MIND BLOWIN SEX…but I suppose that could be considered kryptonite too. Some folks just bring that wild, crazy, stupid energy out of ya! Now you got me over here thinking back. :lol: :oops:

Leggs

September 30th, 2011
9:53 am

@Lucinda ~ I need him land when he sees me, not continue flying. Where’s his next stop so I can meet him there???

Dang, abc. It’s nice to go ga ga over someone while being an adult. Middle schoolers become pregnant with it, adults just lose their mind sometimes. Big difference (lol)….

Lucinda

September 30th, 2011
9:57 am

Leggs ~ he’s gonna find you. he wont’ be wearing the blue and red suit though, so he may not look like what you expect. Ah, such a metaphor. My superman looks NOTHING like I would EVER have even remotely considered dating in my prior life — but now I know so much more and he is perfect.

Reio

September 30th, 2011
9:57 am

Don’t think I can comment on this much. I am married. I love my wife, but kryptonite? I don’t know. Even as a single, younger man,there was no krytonite woman. Maybe I fought it & did’nt allow myself to fall so hard. Every woman that I have had a relationship with, however brief, has been bootable. That is, I could take them or leave them. No krytonite. My wife was the last one.

abc

September 30th, 2011
9:59 am

Maybe chicks would allow their emotions to rule them, but most men would remain rational, I think.

TenderRoni

September 30th, 2011
10:00 am

Mornings,
my kryptonite, all I will say is his name is Mac. I fell in love + he had good D. I’m still working on staying away. big sighs!!!

Celisea

September 30th, 2011
10:00 am

When think in terms of Kryptonite I don’t think in terms of a dude abusing me (not physically) and taken me through unnecessary changes. I’m not sticking around for that, no matter who you are.

When I think of Kryptonite I think of someone that takes you deep. Deeper than you imagined and to a place you didn’t realized even eisted. And gets it right if not in all places, in most faucets.

But that’s just my window. We all have our own individual outlooks.

Reio

September 30th, 2011
10:06 am

TenderRoni – What’s “good D.”?

TenderRoni

September 30th, 2011
10:08 am

@Reio- meant to say the $ex is the best I’v had to date, still sighing!

Leggs

September 30th, 2011
10:09 am

@abc ~ I’m going to share with you what one “rationale” man told me last night! You ready…..

This guy I’ve been talking to online had the nerve to tell me last night that he was a little hurt when I didn’t remember EVERYTHING he told me in our first convo. Heck, it was our first convo, I can’t remember everything (lol), thought I remembered the pertinent things he was saying.

Anyway, he goes on to say that he doesn’t want me online because he wants me to focus all of my attention on him. I said “dude, I don’t even know you. I haven’t even met you yet, why would I stop being online? He got a little mad and started saying he didn’t want guys contacting me or looking at my picture, that we should get off and take the time to meet and get to know each other. I said something off the cuff and he told me to relax. Told him I was relaxing, just sitting here watching tv listening to his nonsense. He says he thinks I’m cute and wants me to himself. I said, I don’t see us being compatible because I’m not going to sit here and argue with some random dude I’ve never met. He told me to relax again. Then he said I was crazy so I hung up the phone.

(I realize this is a major problem I have because I will click off in a heartbeat. Haven’t done it often, but I felt my finger hovering over the end call button. Finally couldn’t take anymore and clicked off.)

He texts me saying I’m crazy but he wants to meet me. My feistiness intrigues him. Well, darling, he’s going to have to intrigue himself because I’m staying put!!! NEXT…..

Rationale, not in the least. Of course there are exceptions to every rule. Just going by you saying “most men would remain rational.”

Reio

September 30th, 2011
10:09 am

TenderRoni – Ok. I see now.

Unknown Soldier

September 30th, 2011
10:15 am

I have my Kryptonite..I have been married for like 15 years but there is still a woman that has a pull on me that I can not seem to get away from…. So much so that I have to take great pains to avoid being in the same place with her…Sad thing is I once told her that if she said the word, I would leave my wife and kids to be with her…She smiled and said “Thanks”…

abc

September 30th, 2011
10:16 am

Leggs, you’ll meet some craziness online, in my experience. I’d recommend avoiding the whole online thing, but it’s become so ubiquitous, to say one should avoid online dating sites, social media, etc. is akin to saying skip lunch for the rest of your life. A sad real-life social development, in my opinion.

SlimNu

September 30th, 2011
10:16 am

Dudes are not incapable of being mesmorized by the cootie

Exiled!

September 30th, 2011
10:17 am

Good morning!

I will be honest,my mom is my kryptonite!

A puddy affection or attachment? I can have it for 20 minutes but once the mutt is released,my senses come back. I have never had anyone make me go crazy.

I do luv,but always with one eye Open!

Freaky Friday is starting early today,I see.

Go ahead Lucinda and Carrie.

U set the ball rolling.

Exiled!

September 30th, 2011
10:18 am

Nutt not mutt!

i'm swiss™

September 30th, 2011
10:18 am

“What you call kryptonite, I call middle school.”

+1

Now, that was funny…. :lol:

kimmie

September 30th, 2011
10:19 am

abc – I’ve met plenty just like Leggs example before online or social media was even available.

abc

September 30th, 2011
10:19 am

Regarding the whole good D thing pertinent to supposed kryptonite, that’s just plain nuts. There is no such thing as a chick who would gain such a hold over me based on just sex. I don’t think many men would be so affected — unless they were toads or something, or very young.

Now, when I was young — like in high school — I could relate. The effects of that, with that girl, did persist into adulthood, to this very day. I married her a few years ago. It wasn’t just about sex, though, that’s for sure. It’s just a kismet, all-around, she’s really the only one for me kind of thing.

oneofeach4me

September 30th, 2011
10:20 am

I had the bad kind of Kryptonite at age 19. We both worked at the same place, dated for 3 years, and moved in together. Dude could finish all my sentences, knew what I liked, wanted and desired. I could feel his presence outside the door before I even consciously knew he was there. I was deeply in love and did some REALLY stupid things that I would NEVER do again for ANYONE. Needless to say, the FBI came aknockin one day looking for Mr. SoandSo. Oh, well no one lives here by that name. Then they show me a picture of my Kryptonite and said this is him. So…. something I called him for 3 years wasn’t even his real name not to mention I had celebrated his bday for that time.. or his FAKE one rather. It took me two years to even date again.

Leggs

September 30th, 2011
10:21 am

@abc ~ even though we met online, his personality traits have been shown through our phone exchanges. He’s clingy and needy. I could have met him in a bar and exchanged numbers that evening. The rest of our telephone exchanges would have been the same. Online or no online. It’s his personalit that is flawed….

Reio

September 30th, 2011
10:21 am

Leggs – This may not be a matter of fact, but I believe it to be true : Men equate sex, or the anticipation of sex with crytonite, in that, the more he wants a woman, in that way, the more power she has over him. This guy online, saw your picture, decided that a roll in the hay with you would be extraordinary, just based on your picture. When it comes to a meaningful relationship, we tend to be much more stubborn and reluctant to allow ourselves to surrender our hearts. If that makes any sense.

Celisea

September 30th, 2011
10:22 am

There is no such thing as a chick who would gain such a hold over me based on just sex

I’m afraid I’m going to have to agree here…being a man couldn’t do that base on just sex. There’s got to be a whooooooooole lot more going on than just that. I’m moved more so by the nonphysical things a man does. When he can get that done for me or because he cares and void of phyical gratification while doing that thing (whatever that is), he can get it :)

Leggs

September 30th, 2011
10:22 am

Ummmm, am I the only one confused reading Ex’s post????

Matt

September 30th, 2011
10:22 am

@slim
When are guys not mesmorized by the cootie
@Exiled
I was thinking the same thing, I can stand up to my father, I can talk crap to anyone, but when my mom is around I turn into a completely different person, I follow every direction to a T. I suppose it’s because she SCARES THE LIVING HELL OUTTA ME!!!!

Kryptonite….. huh….. Nah momma is more like the ground after falling off a horse……too soon?

Leggs

September 30th, 2011
10:23 am

Exactly, kimmie. Don’t regulate it to online… weirdos walking amongst us daily.

abc

September 30th, 2011
10:24 am

Yeah, but I’m saying that his using online means to meet people shows weakness, if not craziness, of itself. The best men aren’t playing around on Facebook or eHarmony. They’re not hanging out in bars, either. If you want to catch a big fish, don’t throw your line into a farm pond — look to the ocean instead.

Mike P

September 30th, 2011
10:25 am

Good Morning All,

I really don’t get this topic, its just doesn’t make sense to me. From what I understand about kryptonite is that its a bad thing and its radiation will weaken and then kill even Super Man, a really bad thing and something to avoid at all times, not just when you feel like it or when you had enough. But from what I’m reading from you all’s comment, they read like fond memories or some sort of good experiences. I have never experience such a relationship with a woman that has weaken me.
I guess anyone who believes they’re in or had a kryptonite relationship (whatever that is?) would do will to choose better next time.

abc

September 30th, 2011
10:27 am

This guy online, saw your picture, decided that a roll in the hay with you would be extraordinary, just based on your picture.

Maybe so, but that illustrates a perverse line of thought that’s just plain creepy. Why would anyone respond to crap like that? I figure it’s along the lines of the discussion the other day, about how societal norms evolve based on people losing their grasp on what’s acceptable behavior, or perhaps their refusal to conform to what’s considered normal. To me, getting the hots and acting upon it based on viewing an online photo isn’t very normal, it’s just creepy.