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Are you high maintenance?

Men beware: High maintenance is a turn off. It’s becoming more and more common for a guy to be into his appearance, image, or his own personal needs. While these guys can be great to look at – and probably smell amazing – dating them can be a lot of work.

I’m not opposed to hard work but I think that at some point, the high maintenance type gets tiring. You grow tired of their egos, attitudes, and their growing list of demands.

What happens when two high maintenance people meet and date? I’ll tell you, their egos have a battle and somebody loses.

Have you ever dated someone who is high maintenance? What do you consider high maintenance?

Are you guilty of exhibiting a little high maintenance behavior? How do you keep it in check?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

351 comments Add your comment

Mike P

September 21st, 2011
10:40 am

Good Morning all,

WD – “Men beware: High maintenance is a turn off. It’s becoming more and more common for a guy to be into his appearance, image, or his own personal needs. While these guys can be great to look at – and probably smell amazing – dating them can be a lot of work.”

Hey WD, that’s not high maintenance… Men can for the most part take care of ourselves… High maintenance is when people have that “things just have to go your way or the day’s ruin” attitude. These people make it so difficult to enjoy there company because a great deal of time is wasted accommodating their “all important needs” to make the day go smoothly. Putting up with these people can become a major drag… Its women (NOT ALL, but SOME) are usually the ones who exhibit these characteristics towards their male pursuers. I can’t imagine how a man would be high maintenance unless he’s being pursued by women he’s not interested in or unless he’s gay. jmo

Purp

September 21st, 2011
10:44 am

I think we need to define High Maintenance, I always thought of it as basically using people for your own advancment or so that you meet a lifestyle that you would not normaly live. I never considered it a way a guy dressed or smells. If a guy is to into himself he is probably just conceited and not high maintenance. If a woman wears a lot of make up and shops for herself all of the time. She is not high maintenance she just likes to cake on make up and spend money.

Standing on the sidelines shaking my head.....

September 21st, 2011
10:52 am

This is really sad…Who the hell are any of you to call anyone HM???? I am a guy that get my hair cut weekly, makes sure my nails trimmed and buffed… Insist on having my gear pressed and take my shoes to get shined twice a month…When I go out, It takes me maybe 90 minutes to get ready….Thats how I roll….Where is the issue with that???

Purp

September 21st, 2011
10:52 am

It was probably said persons “high maintenance” activities that attracted you to them in th first place before you knew they were indeed “high maintenance”…unless you are into judging books by thier cover and deeming that a person is high maintenace based on your own assumptions before getting to know them. People just have different standards and levels. As long as it’s not pushed off on being your responsibility who cares?

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
10:52 am

High maintenance has nothing do with the amount of makeup someone wears.

It’s being snotty, borish, demanding, looking down on folk and acting like your isht don’t stink. On top of all that, truly believing you are to be catered to and pampered simply because you exist.

Purp

September 21st, 2011
10:56 am

Leggs, the second part of your second paragraph I agree with is High Maintenance. The first part I don’t consider to be high maintenance, condescending, lame, tard, snobby yes..but high maintenance no.

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
10:57 am

Valid, PR, but the few HM women I know possess those qualities…that’s why I included them.

kimmie

September 21st, 2011
10:59 am

90 minutes for a GUY to get ready to go out?

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Leggs – Your definition of HM covers quite a few, male & female! LOL!!

Reio

September 21st, 2011
11:01 am

Standing on the sidelines shaking my head….. – Sounds like you ain’t sheet.

Mike P

September 21st, 2011
11:01 am

@Leggs: YOU ARE CORRECT!! There it is right there! what you said exactly. :)
HM is all about the persons attitudes, behaviors, and other characteristics that makes a person difficult to work with, enjoy time with, or even to simply relate to. Being HM has NOTHING to do with personal hygiene nor grooming.

UGA 1999

September 21st, 2011
11:02 am

Hasnt this been reoccurring theme on this blog? High maintenance?

Safensound

September 21st, 2011
11:02 am

@ Brother Exiled! I’m not sure what “other issues” you’re reading regarding my post, I know my kids are not yours, thank gawd…but my point is that there are different opinions or ideas as to how one may see a person as HM whether dating or not. Know who you are and in the end, be happy with yourself and who you are with…peace out! :) )

Exiled!

September 21st, 2011
11:04 am

Snotty,demanding But the other party don’t tolerate it nor acquiesce to it,then bingo,HM

but some,men or female may tolerate it,then no HM there, like Kimmie said.

So it depends.

For the most part tho,unless u have physical attributes that make men want to ‘rent’ u for a minute,most men won’t find snotty,demanding,’out and about on the town everytime’, dinner/lunch on my tab, habits to be acceptable! HM

UGA 1999

September 21st, 2011
11:08 am

Just when I think I am having a bad day….I reconsider and think about the day Troy Davis is having.

SexyCool

September 21st, 2011
11:10 am

Standing, exactly where is he taking you once those 90minutes are up?

abc

September 21st, 2011
11:11 am

Dude… you take your shoes to get shined? Man, the only place someone else shines my shoes is in the airport or something… I guess I should presume you were never in the military. Nails trimmed and buffed? French manicure, maybe?

Just kiddin. Whatever gets you over. 90 minutes is a pretty long time to get ready, though, in my opinion — it takes me maybe 30 minutes from start to shave/shower/dental hygiene/etc. to dressed and out the door, unless I have to press up a shirt or something. You’d have the laundry do your shirts for you, I guess. I have a mental image of a chick sitting down in your living room waiting for you to get ready to go, impatiently checking her watch and all.

SexyCool

September 21st, 2011
11:13 am

I have no desire to discuss Troy Davis. He already has plenty of folks stanning and bandwagonning for him as it is.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

September 21st, 2011
11:13 am

1999:
You mean you have feelings about Troy Davis plight today. I’m all for the death penalty, but when the state of GA is about to put a man down with so much doubt swirling that’s a scary scenario for the rest of us. After 7pm tonight it will be too late to say we made a mistake.

Exiled!

September 21st, 2011
11:14 am

Safesound?

‘I know my kids are not yours’

that’s exactly my point!

U doing good for ur kids,which is normal and acceptable but having those kids brings ‘Other Issues’ for a guy coming in trying to date U!
It’s not easy for him coz he has to content with U and ur ‘trailer’,so to speak. It makes it a High Maintenance relationship for Him.

The best way,proly,in my view,is to get a dude who also happens to be a patent of one or more.

He has a better understanding.

kimmie

September 21st, 2011
11:14 am

Exiled!

September 21st, 2011
11:15 am

Parent of one or more

Purp

September 21st, 2011
11:15 am

From feet hitting the floor to walking out of the door it may take me 30-35 minutes max. Shine my own shoes, Do not get work done on my nails except for nail clippers or my teeth in a pinch. I am very neat and organized, I place what I am going to be wearing the next day out the night prior. All of my other stuff is pressed. Maybe I am high maintenance. LOL

UGA 1999

September 21st, 2011
11:17 am

SexyCool…Oh I agree. I think the man is getting what should have been done many years ago.

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
11:17 am

Cold cut artist = The Ojays (404) 741-1075

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
11:18 am

Same here SC.

Purp

September 21st, 2011
11:18 am

I signed the petition for Troy Davis, if I had a platform to speak I would in additions to all of those who are already. I hate that I have to sit back on this and not have a real outlet. I support the death penalty but when you have no weapon(but the bullet matched one from where he shot someone at a pool party earlier), 7 of 9 witnesses recanted their story, GBI can’t back their findings but yet you still want to fry him. Hell give him life and work the system. I am glad I no longer live in a “red” state.

Exiled!

September 21st, 2011
11:19 am

My wife has been inviting me to go along with her to the pedicure.

I finally relented and went along.

Bleach!

nothing there that’s fun nor really desirable so I waited in the car.

BUT some of y’all females have such ugly feet! My Jesus!
:lol:

no wonder those females switch it up,Englush then.. Korokito henejgd Kirk kito keyete hheee haasaaa

Exiled!

September 21st, 2011
11:19 am

Talking about u!

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
11:19 am

I am very neat. I place what I am going to be wearing the next day out the night prior.

I do the same thing…

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
11:21 am

I think men have uglier feet then women….

Purp

September 21st, 2011
11:21 am

Leggs men should have uglier feet than women.

kimmie

September 21st, 2011
11:23 am

Purp – You are high maintenance!! But seriously, I’m a woman and it doesn’t take me 90 minutes, especially if I already know what I’m going to wear. If you do upkeep all along, it shouldn’t take that much time. Like doing the laundry regularly and pressing what you want to wear beforehand. My hair is in an easy to maintain style so all I have to do is run a comb through it in the morning, I don’t wear a ton of makeup and nails should not be an every day issue with anyone. Shower, brush teeth, don’t see why an hour and a half is necessary, but do you.

UGA 1999

September 21st, 2011
11:23 am

Purp….I wonder what would happen if the state attempted to charge those who have recanted their story with perjury? I know there is a statute of limitations with perjury but still……

There was plenty of evidence…RIP

Manly Man

September 21st, 2011
11:23 am

It takes you NINETY MINUTES to get ready??? I bet you squat to pee, too. I’m sorry, but that ain’t normal for a guy….I don’t care how much you primp. I can go from being sweaty on the tennis court to shower, to shave, to drying hair to my suit in around 15 minutes. 20 minutes if I’m feeling lazy.

I’m sorry, there’s just something wrong with 90 minutes for a guy (ish) to get ready.

Into the Light

September 21st, 2011
11:24 am

After 7pm tonight it will be too late to say we made a mistake.

Agree 100%, BF.

Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote

September 21st, 2011
11:25 am

30 to 40 minutes maximum and that’s slow poking around.

Purp

September 21st, 2011
11:27 am

UGA, they should and they should also prosecute judges who signs death warrants for those who are found not guilty after that judge sentenced them to death. I don’t know if the guy is innocent or guilty but I do know that he is not guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. You know something your forefathers instituted…reasonable doubt worked for Casey Anthony but not Troy Davis. LOL

Into the Light

September 21st, 2011
11:27 am

90 minutes? Unh-uh. I value my sleep too much to take that long to get ready.

UGA 1999

September 21st, 2011
11:29 am

Purp….you do know what resonable doubt is dont you? Troy Davis killed a cop and 7 people saw him do it. They also proved that same weapon from Davis was used to shoot someone else earlier that night. He was convicted of that shooting as well. He does not deserve to live.

Celisea

September 21st, 2011
11:30 am

UGAman – You just wanted to go there. You’re an instigator. Say something on the dang topic for once without always looking for an opening.

I’m not high maintenance. I’ve been treated to spa treatments (love those) but thruthfully, that sort of stuff has never been my thing. I don’t wear make-up, I don’t like folks shaving, buffering or cutting on me. I much prefer to do myself. Outside of my “personal” maintenance, I only have a stylist that’s about it for me. Now, do I like “nice” clothes and more so shoes….yeees yeeees yeees. I’d much rather take pamper money and buy something I can show for it. I won’t turn down being treated but I can pamper my ownself at home. I can soak in a hot bath if that’s what I need, I have a Dr. Scholls foot spa so I can do my own pedicures. Just never been one that went with the spa craze. Too, I don’t like going behind a bunch of other folks, no matter how much sanitizing they say goes on. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not knocking folks that do it, it’s just not high on my list of priorities. But I love to look nice. Not over the top, spending the mortgage payment kind of nice, but quality nice.

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
11:31 am

@Purp ~ I agree. I’m not talking about the shape or anything, but all the crud between the nails and the dead skin buildup on the bottom of their feet. More men should go in for more peddys…

One hour top and I’m ready (if not before the hour is up).

Celisea

September 21st, 2011
11:32 am

shaving as in bikini wax

Into the Light

September 21st, 2011
11:32 am

Oh, good grief. UGA, do you always, always, always have to come in and try to get ish stirred up?? Can’t you just come in and be pleasant and go with the flow and not try to incite arguments? Surely you must have more interesting things to do….

UGA 1999

September 21st, 2011
11:33 am

Leggs

September 21st, 2011
11:33 am

@Celisea ~ don’t even understand why anyone responded. It was that dangling carrot waiting from someone to bite….

When he has bad days he thinks of the day Troy Davis is having…what a setup that I hoped everyone would see through.

Celisea

September 21st, 2011
11:34 am

bikini….I don’t need correcting…I said what I said. Unless you have one of these too??? BIKINI!!!

One hour for me to get ready…sometime a few minutes over but mostly an hour.

5Jay

September 21st, 2011
11:34 am

A High Maintenance Dude is someone who thinks he is entitled to a 10 when he is only worth a 5. He has emotional issues and scars so deep that you have to walk on egg shells to be around him.

Celisea

September 21st, 2011
11:35 am

No ITL because he’s a racist and rather than say over here what he blantanly says over there, he find other ways to get it done. He’s an idiot. Yep, I said it…name calling I did.

Purp

September 21st, 2011
11:35 am

UGA where is the weapon, now the GBI can’t back it’s findings and 7 of those 9 witness recanted their testimony. I’m not falling for your obvious bait today to make it a certain type of issue. Hope you enjoy the rest of your day and maybe you should have a little party at 7pm tonight.

Celisea

September 21st, 2011
11:36 am

And UGAman, if he didn’t do it, sorry for those killing an innocent person and if he did, good thing God is God and not you. No matter how heinous, if he repents and finds contrition he just might beat you into heaven.