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Archive for June, 2011

Make the date guy friendly

I always have a great time on a date when the guy has put significant effort and thought into it. There is just something sweet about a “customized” date arranged to fit my likes and interests. Basically, the guy makes a great impression as a gentleman who tries to avoid “one size fits all” approach.

So how do ladies return the favor? Reciprocate the gesture and find out what he does to relax, have fun, or how he seeks adventure.

What would you consider guy friendly dates?

Ladies do you know how to plan a date that men would be excited about?

Guys what is the best time you have had on a date that was planned around your favorite things to do? What would you want to do on a date that was planned around what you are in to?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

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In marital news: ‘How married are you?’

You have to hand it to relationship writers. They come up with the most fascinating ways to spin the topic of marriage. Did you know that there are categories of marriage that are clearly defined? I know you are probably skeptical. I was too when I read about it.

(Sidebar: If you are on the fence about marriage. Stop reading here. No, really. Come back tomorrow.)

So of all the different types of marriage that author Pamela Haag outlines in her book, I was most interested in the semi-happy marriage. To wit:

All marriages have their ups and downs, but the semihappy marriage is chronically ambivalent. It’s a marriage that’s neither miserable nor all that successful. Semi happy spouses genuinely can’t decide if they should stick it out and live with the faults in the marriage, or if those faults are too much to handle.

I don’t know about you, but my unmarried self does not read this and think of marital bliss.  I am thankful to have my parent’s marriage as a real life example of …

Continue reading In marital news: ‘How married are you?’ »

Should you confess?

We talked about how to spot deception and lies yesterday and I thought about lying by omission. Some people argue that failing to tell the full truth is not technically a lie. Well, I believe that when your intent is to purposely withhold information, you clearly are being dishonest.

When you are dating someone, it helps to figure out what kind of “moral compass” people are guided by. When you don’t share a similar outlook, you would probably disagree on how they handle the important things.

If you made some kind of mistake, do you confess your wrongdoing or could you quietly keep it to yourself?

A lot of guys I know say they would rather not know if they were cheated on or deceived. If it comes out, they will deal with it. If not, they are fine with being kept in the dark.

I like to make informed decisions so I would rather a confession. If I had to admit to something I did wrong, I would suck it up and take my chances with the truth. What do you think? Is confession …

Continue reading Should you confess? »

Date detective: Are they lying to you?

Fox network has a really interesting show called Lie To Me that centers around a company of psychologists and analysts who detect when people are telling the truth.

I found myself paying attention to what they focused on when looking for signs of deceit. It’s fascinating to see the facial and visceral reactions that happen when someone is lying to you!

Since we can’t take portable lie detectors dates (do they make these?) do you ever try to decipher if you are being told the truth?

One of our wonderful readers (Thanks Sexy Leggs!) sent me a great article that listed a few signs of deceit:

1. When questioned, deceptive people say as little as possible.

2. Though they say little, they tend to spontaneously give a justification for what they are saying, usually without being prompted.

3. They tend to repeat questions before answering them, perhaps to give themselves time to concoct an answer.

Very interesting, right? Do you ever wander if people are hoodwinking you about …

Continue reading Date detective: Are they lying to you? »

What’s wrong with sexting?

I’m sure you are beyond tired of hearing about the fallout over Anthony Weiner. I understand! If I hear one more Weiner joke I’ll probably throw something.

However, I’d be remiss in my dating blogger duties if I didn’t dedicate at least one day of discussion to a common thing on the dating scene:  Sexting. Texting with sexual innuendo, racy pictures, etc.

I was reading on New York Times about the debate on adult sexting. Is it wrong? Are you uncomfortable with it? Is it something that you do when you aren’t with someone exclusively?

I was having dinner with friends when the Weiner topic came up (Seriously, no pun intended) and the guys asked us how many of us had engaged in sexy text messaging. Turns out, the better question was, who hasn’t? Apparently, sexting goes down sometimes before you seal the deal.

It’s a tricky thing, though. You can’t go from just meeting someone to sending them a random picture of you in underwear. It takes finesse! Some people don’t get …

Continue reading What’s wrong with sexting? »

Relationship check: Are you being manipulated?

If you’ve ever dated someone who thrives on drama, you know what an “emotional terrorist” is.  It is when you are in a relationship with someone who drains your energy (not in the fun way) and uses emotional warfare on you to get what they want.

I know it sounds outrageous – but hyperbole aside, dating someone who is manipulating can become a hostage situation of sorts. It’s even worse when you don’t recognize when it’s happening. Of course, in hindsight you realize how bad it was in those moments of clarity. Lesson learned, right?

How do you know when you are being manipulated in a relationship? When you are caught up in the sex, emotions, breakups and makeups, is it impossible to see the signs?

Have you ever been in a similar relationship? How did you handle it?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Relationship check: Are you being manipulated? »

Dating: Red flags ahead?

The really funny thing about dating is that everyone seems so normal when you meet them. Then you get to know them and discover the things that make them unique and quirky…or a liiitttle crazy, deranged, or weird.

Mr. M is back today and he always asks the great questions. Check out what he has to say about what happens when things get dicey:

When we begin dating someone new, there are two sides to the story. There is the good, which entails the bliss, excitement for the possibilities, and the refreshing feeling that this may be the right dating situation we were looking for…then there is the BAD…the lingering feeling that we are getting to know this person but we don’t know them that well and we don’t know what we are getting into.

The question is when you are dating someone new and you see something questionable such as a racy text, or text picture from an ex, or someone in or around their life that you are curious, do you say something about it even though you two are not …

Continue reading Dating: Red flags ahead? »

Dating around? It’s complicated

What would you do if you were seeing someone new and you spotted them out on the town with somebody else? Although you two are nowhere near exclusive, you don’t really want to literally see them hitting it off with someone else, either.

Would you approach them and say hello? Would you go the other way and hope you weren’t spotted and subsequently deemed a date stalker?

I think our egos make us believe that when we meet someone we really like, they automatically like us back – in the same way. That is not always the case though!

Do you find that dating around and seeing multiple people gets complicated?

Would you lose interest if you happen to see your romantic interest out dating around?

Hat tip to Mr. M for this topic idea

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

Continue reading Dating around? It’s complicated »

Dating: Ever been oddly attracted?

I was reading an article about some New York bachelors who admitted that their swanky apartments helped them score with the ladies. Of course I found this outrageous and ridiculous but soon realized that some people are attracted to people for odd reasons.

I once was so enamored with a guy simply because he had the most amazing shoes. Seriously, I actually looked forward to our dates because I wanted to see what shoes he would wear. Strange, I know!

Do you recall being oddly attracted to someone? Maybe it caught you off guard, or surprised you. Perhaps you didn’t know you were into chicks who wore glasses or maybe you discovered that men who are professors are sexy.

What is the strangest thing that attracted you to someone or vice versa?

Continue reading Dating: Ever been oddly attracted? »

First loves

You never forget your first kiss, your first love, or your first heartbreak! What is it about our firsts that leave such a lasting impression on us?

Do you recall your first love? Do you ever get the urge to check in with them and see where they are in life? Have they ever tried to find you?

What do you think you learned from your first love?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures In Atlanta Blog

Continue reading First loves »