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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

All the right moves

One of my friends “over shared” his secret to figuring out who would be good in bed and who would be bad.  I argued that there is simply no way to tell that sort of thing.  You can speculate and imagine, but you don’t know who will have all the right moves and who will send you into fits of frustration.

Personally, I don’ t ever think that men are sizing me up like that..I’m oblivious to it.  That is how I prefer to remain because being sexy and wanting to appeal to men is one thing.  Trying to display anything beyond that sounds like too much energy.

At any rate,  is it common for some guys to imagine who would be good and who wouldn’t?  Another guy friend told me that a person’s looks directly correlates to their skills.  Honestly, I found that offensive.  What do you think, good looking people aren’t good in bed?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta

299 comments Add your comment

Blackfoote

May 26th, 2011
11:00 am

LOL……@Leggs

SexyCool

May 26th, 2011
11:00 am

UGA – I wasn’t flirting, I promise. Just compliments. (lol)

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
11:00 am

@SlimNU ~ that’s how I felt with the comment to me on 3somes, as if my moniker had something to do with it. I was going to let it wash down my back.

Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)

May 26th, 2011
11:01 am

@ SlimNu re “not afraid to be naked”. That is why I seem to always lose at strip gin rummy whils sitting on the back porches of townhomes and take “plenty of showers”. Not the size, just follow the old adage…”when in doubt, whip it out”.;-)

Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)

May 26th, 2011
11:02 am

@ Dan…I got dumped by a “midget” once…thoroughly disheartening ;-)

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
11:04 am

Blackfoote, I am here until Tuesday

Tiffani Day

May 26th, 2011
11:05 am

Some women that are too well kept and men that are too well kept, are often a bit RIGID in bed. Just too cute to get nasty. That is why you see men such as ARNOLD getting down with that busted up maid because there may have been some things Maria was too cute to do. Highly attractive people often survive off looks alone. Much the same way RICH men SUCK in bed and feel that they need to be served VERSUS the BROKE dudes that turn you out to get in your wallet.

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
11:06 am

SexyCool, if you are going to step out…step out with someone you know. Like a tall fit italian. LOL

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
11:08 am

RandyT – lol….reminds me of a time the beau and I were playing strip tonk. I think he cheated because he was pretty much still fully covered in clothes. I on the other hand… :oops:

abc

May 26th, 2011
11:09 am

I respectfully disagree, Randy. As a man, I couldn’t possibly care less about my relative performance, physical attributes, or any other comparisons between me and anyone else.

And, I don’t make any special effort to make sure she gets hers. That’s up to her. I’m there to get mine, and if she makes an equal effort, it’s on.

That’s the way it’s always been for me. No agendas, no game plans, no checklists, no nothing, just be spontaneous and get your own. It’s always worked out quite well for me and for the ones I’ve been with. That said, I can’t say I’ve EVER had a less than satisfying experience, and I’ve never had a partner tell me she had, either. Supposed issues of ‘talent’ are kind of stupid, in my opinion. Just bring it, it’ll all be fine.

Now, that’s all I intend to contribute to the sex talk. It ain’t right, yall!

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
11:10 am

abc – So let me get this straight, you don’t put forth any effort to help make the horizontal tango pleasurable for your SO? She has to get it on her own?

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
11:12 am

@Randy – I’m sorry that happened, here’s hoping were over her quickly

@Slim – I set the deck, pull out err trick I know (look over there) when playing strip nething

@Tiffany – ^5 on that..

If she worried about breaking a nail, she was too prissy to ride this ride

Blackfoote

May 26th, 2011
11:13 am

Downtown you’re either on Peachtree or Marietta streets, I’ll have to show you some more of our southern hospitality. Hit me up rlrobins3@comcast.net.

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
11:14 am

Blackfoote, you correct.

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
11:15 am

“And, I don’t make any special effort to make sure she gets hers. That’s up to her. I’m there to get mine, and if she makes an equal effort, it’s on.”

Dang, abc. Have to respect your honesty. I believe you might be the first male I’ve heard say that.

SexyCool

May 26th, 2011
11:16 am

Naw, Purp…I’m good. Besides, it’s too croweded over your way…the wife, her purse, the baby, his car seat. Naw, I’ll stick with TheDude and the dog.

abc

May 26th, 2011
11:17 am

SlimNu, it’s a matter of my efforts having a reciprocal effect, and her efforts having a likewise reciprocal effect, without reference to Kama Sutra or any other reference of technique. Spontaneous variety, improvised on the spot, is the deal. I want it this way, now I want it that way, etc. I’ve never had an experience where my partner didn’t understand that to get hers would require her to lilkewise go after it — it’s not as if one just sits back and insists ‘give me mine’. You have to come and get it.

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
11:21 am

@SlimNu ~ does your email address start with a “k”

Blackfoote

May 26th, 2011
11:22 am

LOL…..@abc
I respect a man who get his and have no worries….LOL

I have stumbled a few times abc but I was taught by an older woman to let them get theirs first.

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
11:24 am

abc, LOL

I make sure she gets hers…always! LOL

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
11:44 am

Leggs – Yup ;-)

Fion

May 26th, 2011
11:49 am

Fella’s, sure fire way to tell if she is smoking “HOT” in bed and will make
your eyes roll back in your head.

Notice how she Drives a car. If she drives fast and aggressively, hold on, you’ve hooked a “Live” one.
If drives conservatively, always within the speed limit, very vanilla. Well it’s just that vanilla.

Celisea

May 26th, 2011
11:52 am

Leggs – You got mail

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
11:54 am

for the record: motivation is on both the workout and R & B mix; it’s just that dope

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
11:55 am

it’s not as if one just sits back and insists ‘give me mine’. You have to come and get it

Well I can’t i’ve ever had that mentality either to just sit back….unless of course I was being given some MPA (mouth piece action) but even then, I still have to be receptive & open to the big O

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
12:03 pm

@Slim

That’s just selfish

MPA is one activity that can be shared..

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
12:06 pm

@Fion ~ that too is not a good indicator (lol).

Simple Man....

May 26th, 2011
12:06 pm

{sigh….} Nothing in the world like some good ole’ fashion MPA…. :) :D:)

Fion

May 26th, 2011
12:07 pm

@Leggs Fion ~ that too is not a good indicator (lol).

ok, if you think so. Listen, I stumbled on to this in my 20’s. I’ll say this.I’ve been right more times
than I’ve wrong. :)

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
12:07 pm

MPA can be shared but i’m speaking of when it’s only on a one-way street at the time. lol

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
12:13 pm

The fact you’ve been wrong says something about how reliable that indicator is. :wink:

Honestly, I have a friend that drives somewhat like Ms. Daisy. She always complains about how fast I drive compared to her driving. If the stories she tells me of her sexual romps are true, your theory is flawed. She’s a slow, cautious driver, but she’s wild when not behind the wheel!

SexyCool

May 26th, 2011
12:17 pm

Leggs – now you know some folks lie about their stuff. And I don’t anybody who will say, “Sex with me is pretty horrible.”

Fion

May 26th, 2011
12:17 pm

@Leggs

“She always complains about how fast I drive compared to her driving. ”

oh,hooo!!!! So Leggs what does that say about you?

Fion

May 26th, 2011
12:30 pm

Hey, it’s a holiday weekend. If you got time for Lab work here ya go.

All the Blog men, raise your right hand and put on that White Lab jacket.
Now repeat after me,

“I hereby conduct this experiment in good faith for the good of all mankind.’
If successful in running into a Freak (cuse me) a lady with considerable talent
I will conduct myself as a Gentleman at all times and Bang her Brains out.

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
12:30 pm

@SexyC ~ of course people lie about their romps. You also know which one of your “good” friends are telling the truth (for the most part).

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
12:36 pm

Fion now that I think about it, driving is a good indicator. Great point!

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
12:37 pm

Some people just aren’t ’sex’ people for whatever reason.

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
12:38 pm

Men, do you all naturally assume a chick is probably better in bed if she’s more open with talking about sex?

TenderRoni

May 26th, 2011
12:38 pm

Hi All,

I’ve never heard this theory of looks correlating to skills in the bedroom. That’s Ludicrous!

I lean towards comfort and communication that i have with the man, and of course if I’m emotional connected with him, the O is easier to get too.

SexyCool

May 26th, 2011
12:43 pm

I thought is was Ludacris…..(I kid. I kid.)

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
12:48 pm

I cannot hear that word and not think of Mike Tyson. He used that word so much I thought it was his middle name!

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
12:48 pm

@Slim

If we can talk about (not necessarily dirty), just likes, dislikes, attempts at finding likes/dislikes, etc.

If it’s not a taboo subject (like “I’m eating, not now”)

If it can be the centerpiece of a measured conversation in public,

If it can be a running joke (’ow, cramp, cramp’)

If it’s a playful, yet intimate thing that you too can talk about, then yes; it make her better at it, by letting me know what she knows about pleasing her.

Yeap. Conversations about/alluding to/referencing/commenting on sex are the best.

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
12:49 pm

Oh yeah, talking dirty about helps too…..

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
12:52 pm

Well let me just say that a dude asking me sexual type questions early on in the “Getting To know You” phase, are a turn off to me. It sort of gives me the impression that you have already made the assumption that I was going to give you some before I even know how many siblings you have, or your last name. Patience my dear, patience

The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)

May 26th, 2011
12:54 pm

“Men, do you all naturally assume a chick is probably better in bed if she’s more open with talking about sex?”

That all depends on how she’s talking about it. If it’s just general bravado and posturing, then no, not so much. But if she is comfortable enough to have frank conversations about what works for her and what doesn’t, then that’s a big 10-4. The best chicks in bed, IMO, are those that know exactly how to get themselves off and can show you exactly how you fit in to that process… :-D

The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)

May 26th, 2011
1:01 pm

Slim — Last name: Arrington. Siblings: 1 brother, 1 sister. Now, bend over.

;-) :lol:

Fion

May 26th, 2011
1:03 pm

@ Swiss

….just asking. Was that the Shy approach I read about last week in one of those Sex books?

Fion

May 26th, 2011
1:09 pm

@ Slim
‘Well let me just say that a dude asking me sexual type questions early on in the “Getting To know You” phase, are a turn off to me.’

I hear ya. Most men are simply trying to discern If the Choocie is in Play.
All be it , some go about it badly, that is where most guys are coming from.

The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)

May 26th, 2011
1:09 pm

Fion — I don’t know what the official name is, or even if it has one… I was just trying to get Slim to show me her cooter. :lol:

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
1:10 pm

@Slim

Admittedly, I did it, a lot.

Again, it was one of those ‘weeding out’ type deals for me. As stated, if you can’t talk openly and honestly about sex, then chances are you have hangups (greater chance is that you don’t). So if we just talking about it, what’s to say that at the end of night I don’t just walk you to your car and give the church hug?

Maybe I just want to find out if you’re a “NO THE LIGHTS ARE ON”* kinda chick before we get too deep off in this.

* = worst chick ever…..ever