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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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All the right moves

One of my friends “over shared” his secret to figuring out who would be good in bed and who would be bad.  I argued that there is simply no way to tell that sort of thing.  You can speculate and imagine, but you don’t know who will have all the right moves and who will send you into fits of frustration.

Personally, I don’ t ever think that men are sizing me up like that..I’m oblivious to it.  That is how I prefer to remain because being sexy and wanting to appeal to men is one thing.  Trying to display anything beyond that sounds like too much energy.

At any rate,  is it common for some guys to imagine who would be good and who wouldn’t?  Another guy friend told me that a person’s looks directly correlates to their skills.  Honestly, I found that offensive.  What do you think, good looking people aren’t good in bed?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta

299 comments Add your comment

David

May 26th, 2011
8:10 am

Ummm….yeah. Practically every man imagines if a woman is good in bed by the way she walks, carries herself and especially dances. I did that at a traffic light this morning, will do so at work and will do so on the way home tonight. And this is a big deal?

Lana

May 26th, 2011
8:12 am

Both genders do it. That’s no secret. Some call it
“undressing him/her with your eyes”. Now I don’t walk up and feel the size of his manhood, but I sure do imagine what he would be like in bed. If he’s a hottie, that’s one of the first things I do.

Wifey

May 26th, 2011
8:13 am

Well, duh…..

knockoutblonde

May 26th, 2011
8:18 am

@Wise Diva…too much energy? Holy cow! I’ll put every ounce of energy into being sexy (don’t give me this pant load about it being shallow) and sensual. My man better do it as well. It’s a constant state of being even at work, in a professional way. You can be at a board meeting or on a sales appointment, be all professional, informative and still have that sparkle in your eye. That’s why women can make men do pretty much anything we want them to if you play your cards right and push the right buttons. Wallflowers, drop and give me twenty!

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
8:33 am

@KOB

I was with you til that second to last sentence.

Haven’t met the female yet that “make me do what [she] wants me to do” because 9 of 10 times, I’m not pressed to get her.

On topic:

Dancing tells you nothing – when that thang hit, all that “dropping low” and “twerking” ceases; buleeve me.

Walking is an indicator. I’ve literally followed a woman down the street (which I don’t do) because of the walk. I’m batting 50% on that indicator – cause sometimes, those heels distort the natural.

And their looks, please. Some “pretty” chicks don’t get down like that because they feel like they’re pretty and don’t have to. In that, an “ugly duckling” pretty chick (used to ‘meh’ grew into beautiful) are the best at it because of their latent insecurities.

Yeap. Figuring this kinda thing out is not as hard (or simple) as people make it.

Good morning

aromaticcurator

May 26th, 2011
8:38 am

I paid $32.67 for a XBOX 360 and my mom got a 17 inch Toshiba laptop for $94.83 being delivered to our house tomorrow by FedEX. I will never again pay expensive retail prices at stores. I even sold a 46 inch HDTV to my boss for $650 and it only cost me $52.78 to get. Here is the website we using to get all this stuff, http://BidsWork.com

Dave

May 26th, 2011
8:44 am

I can honestly say that the most absolutely stunning woman I ever dated (forner Hawaiin Tropic model) was about a 3 when it came to “hittin that thang”. Frequency…all the time. But for quality…about a 3. And trust me, this chick looks were an 11. So looks are no indicator.

My personal best indicator is the personality, openness, daring-do and excitability. You hear that if they talk the talk, it ain’t the truth. But more times than not, in my own experience, when they talk like that, they play like that. It’s just much more than one item to consider.

White man moonwalking

May 26th, 2011
8:50 am

If they keep themselves relatively fit, have an outgoing personality, have a bit of an edge in their conversation and can communicate with their eyes, that’s all I need to at least go for a test drive. Oh, a special consideration goes out if they play sports well. That means they know how to sweat and enjoy doing it. Female tennis players and vollyball players get extra props.

Lana

May 26th, 2011
8:54 am

I think it’s easier to tell things like this when you are watching and observing a woman than if you do the same with a man. With men, it’s probably the way they talk and the words they use. Men have to start off with a tight body (no fatties or anorexics for me) to get the CD playing. The song that comes out is the clincher. Just me, I guess.

Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)

May 26th, 2011
8:57 am

“You can’t tell the book by the cover”

There is a reason for that trite but true expression. It is more than just looks…it is how the two of you mesh together also. i’ve been with beautiful women and it seemed we were woking at cross purposes or always in the “wrong place” at the wrong time. The best I’ve had were ones who totally surprised me…straight on the outside, part “Rick Jame’s Superfreak” behind closed doors.

I imagine, but only in a superficial way…”the real proof is in the ‘pudding’ (or fill in the blank)”.

Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)

May 26th, 2011
8:59 am

sorry for the typos

Rational Citizen

May 26th, 2011
9:08 am

While there are always exceptions, typically the crazier a woman is the better she will be in bed.

Superman

May 26th, 2011
9:09 am

Just a quick question…sorry for not being sure.. Is this an primarily an African American blog?

Superman

May 26th, 2011
9:16 am

Women who have their nipples pierced or shave their hoohaa are great in bed.

Wifey

May 26th, 2011
9:22 am

You can always tell the women that really, really love to do “it” because they are exploring different ways and angles to enhance their own pleasure and they always look forward to the next time. The other women have inhibitions, hang ups and emotional barriers and keep putting off the next time. I would fit into the first catagory.

Oh and Superman, I am white, so it isn’t exclusive.

Superman

May 26th, 2011
9:25 am

I’m AA myself, and I just tend to open up more when I’m talking to my sistas… even though you never really know who you are talking to on these things! :)

Ann

May 26th, 2011
9:26 am

Superman, does it matter?

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
9:27 am

Superman – What’s makes you suspect there are more AA’s here than non-AA’s?

Wifey

May 26th, 2011
9:27 am

@Superman, I cannot believe that their are women that don’t shave or trim down there. At the very least a trim and leave a patch up front. Never met a man that didn’t prefer it smooth.

Ann

May 26th, 2011
9:29 am

Wifey, my last BF loved it au naturel.

UGA fan

May 26th, 2011
9:31 am

I know what you mean Wifey… I prefer my women smooth, don’t want a hair on my tongue, they are impossible to get off!! LOL I myself stay trimmed short and neat on top, and shave “the boys” smooth

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
9:35 am

Another guy friend told me that a person’s looks directly correlates to their skills. = This has to be one of the dumbest things I’ve read this morning.

One’s personality, openness can be indicators of how they are in bed. Dancing, hmmmm, perhaps a little. Just cuz you can pump the air while dancing, may not necessarily translate to bumping between the sheets.

Oh, and good morning to all of you!

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
9:36 am

I’m AA myself, and I just tend to open up more when I’m talking to my sistas… even though you never really know who you are talking to on these things

Super – Well, being that we can’t see who we’re talking to, feel free to be as open as you can be. Openness makes the day go by, so bring the juicy. ;-)

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
9:38 am

Leggs – MORNING, what a way to make an entrance :lol:

Superman

May 26th, 2011
9:40 am

Thanks SlimNu.. juicy is my favorite.. ;)

UGA fan

May 26th, 2011
9:41 am

So, Wifey, I assume you must be married.. :(

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
9:41 am

Haystack Calhoun

May 26th, 2011
9:45 am

Lana was o.k.
but a little flabby in the hips.

Wifey

May 26th, 2011
9:46 am

UGA fan, nope. Going through a long divorce. But I started back on the dating scene not long after I filed.

Lovely Brown

May 26th, 2011
9:48 am

Walking is an indicator. I’ve literally followed a woman down the street (which I don’t do) because of the walk. I’m batting 50% on that indicator – cause sometimes, those heels distort the natural

@Dan- This made me smile real big. I had a guy tell me one time that I walked like ‘it’ was good. :mrgreen:

Looks are not a good way to judge at all. I had a good looking wrestler, fitness nut boyfriend who was a minute man…the only thing that keep us together as long as we were was his personality was/is top shelf, one the nicest people you will ever meet.

My husband when I met him, all though good looking he may have weigh about 130lbs soaking wet…. he was a lil bitty thang with a big thang and skills, he had/has the goods! I think it just depends on the person, the luck of the draw :-)

UGA fan

May 26th, 2011
9:48 am

hmm….ever met any hot 36 year old guys on a dating blog?? LOL

Superman

May 26th, 2011
9:51 am

SlimNu.. LOVE that gap.. yummy! I think it is an attitude and that look in a woman’s eyes that really let you know that she loves to ride it…

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
9:52 am

Leggs – For whatever reason, when I read your first post, I pictured Clair Huxtable talking to Vanessa for something she did and just plain stated she was being stupid. LOL!

So tell me fellas, what is it you look for in a walk that gives the impression ole girl has some good puddy? I heard back in the day that if a girl had a GAP (space up close to the puddy area instead of the thighs rubbing together) that it was a good indicator. When I stand with my feet together, you can see what’s behind me since the thighs don’t touch. :lol:

Purple Rain(In Atlanta for the Weekend!)

May 26th, 2011
9:56 am

Is this blog primarily African American or White? I ‘m not neither and I would still like to participate. :)

I think ugly women would suck in bed, but then again I hope all women “suck” in bed and I have never had an ugly woman…according to my standard!

We are in town, she’s visiting her buds showing off Dante and I am partying with Arturo!

Adam

May 26th, 2011
9:56 am

Did Eve shave or trim down there and make it smooth in the Garden of Eden?

I prefer God’s work over Gillette Venus and reddish stubble.

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
9:58 am

@SlimNU ~ I remember that episode. I think they were in her bedroom talking and she’s sitting there all meekish trying to explain herself.

And, I’ve heard the “gap” theory my entire life. I’ve been told I have a nice walk. One Jamaican told me I had a “nice, long gait.” I laughed at him comparing me to a horse!

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
9:58 am

reddish stubble….you like those Irish chicks (lolol).

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 26th, 2011
9:59 am

@Slim

Some guys just like that visual of the “gap”, so that’s that on that. I’ve found it not to be a viable indicator.

For me, the walk is hips swaying (naturally), long strides, oblivious to the world, rythmic motion – best I can describe it.

Thing of it is the “walk” is in heels, flats, form fitting, or loose clothing. It’s just a walk.

Smelling good and being attractive has had me floating on air like one of those cartoon characters after a piece of ham.

UGA fan

May 26th, 2011
9:59 am

Sorry Adam… that’s a bad look! I have short hair up on my big head, and I like a neatly trimmed/ shaved look down by my little head!

SlimNu

May 26th, 2011
9:59 am

Adam – It’s basically different strokes for different folks. I’ve known guys who go for the clean shaven bald CT, come go for well-trimmed hair & side burns, and some go for the BUSH!!!!! Guess it just depends on what tickles your pickle or floats your boat.

Tranny

May 26th, 2011
9:59 am

Let’s get to another point, are more fit people better or “less fit”?

Purple Rain(In Atlanta for the Weekend!)

May 26th, 2011
10:01 am

Is this blog primarily African American or White? I ‘m not neither and I would still like to participate.

I think ugly women would suck in bed, but then again I hope all women “suck” in bed and I have never had an ugly woman…according to my standard!

We are in town, she’s visiting her buds showing off Dante and I am partying with Arturo!

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
10:05 am

Walk has nothing to do with how good a woman is in bed, been there done that. Fitness relates to stamina….out of shape, then that woman is out of gas around round 2 or 3. The most prudish and stiff of women can knock your socks off in bed. Don’t be startled just because she kept it all under wraps. LOL

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
10:05 am

If she can deep throat a cucumber, egg plant or bananna that is a good physical indicator to me. LOL

Superman, I am not attracted to out of shape women so I don’t take that risk.

Simple Man....

May 26th, 2011
10:06 am

Morning Folks…..

I don’t think there is a physical give away as to whether a person is good in the sack, but spend a few minutes talking to them and you will have apretty sure indicator….Its in their eyes and the way they think..Their words and their “air” tells volume about their confidence level and thats where greatness in the sack comes from….

Superman

May 26th, 2011
10:06 am

But sometimes an out of shape or not as attractive person can be better, because they don’t get that many opportunities.. and so they think about sex all the time! (man or woman)

Leggs

May 26th, 2011
10:07 am

Many would be operating on fumes with round 3…especially if round ond and 2 was a rigorus, bone thrusting workout!

Superman

May 26th, 2011
10:08 am

thoughts on threesomes anyone?

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
10:09 am

Leggs, it’s not a job it’s an adventure.

If she can deep throat a cucumber, egg plant or bananna that is a good physical indicator to me. LOL

Superman, I am not attracted to out of shape women so I don’t take that risk.

Purple Rain

May 26th, 2011
10:10 am

Superman, if all parties involved are single it’s okay. If anyone is married/serious relationship it’s a bad thing. IMO