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Dating: Youth or Experienced?

I asked Mr. M to guest blog and he wants to talk about something pretty interesting today, I do enjoy a male’s perspective to liven things up!

It’s all about compatibility in dating and he asks “What do you prefer, youth or experience?”

Dating in Atlanta always goes in waves and as time goes on, naturally our taste change as we discussed last week. Lately I have been doing  some volunteering, attending social mixers, events, conferences, and just being out and about. I am meeting a lot of new women who are really cool. There is only one issue that I am confused about: What do I prefer youth or experience?

The young women that I have been meeting are women ranging from 22-26, just getting started in their careers. They also seem a lot more laid back and just fun, maybe it’s because of their inexperience?  The women that are more experienced in life, careers and relationships have their pros and cons also.

If you have a choice, what do you prefer youth and someone that you may have to take your time with , or someone more experienced, who does not need you to hold their hand?

By Mr. M, Guest Blogger for Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

194 comments Add your comment

SlimNu

May 25th, 2011
7:56 am

Good morning,

Will have to pop back in later but at first glance I would say I’d like a bit of a balance. I don’t want to be with a dude who stil has milk on his breath, not sure or has no idea what direction he wants to go in but at the same time I don’t want a BEEN THERE, DONE IT ALL dude where nothing is new to him. I still want to be able to experience some things together and it be fresh & exciting.

Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)

May 25th, 2011
8:36 am

As for me, granted I date in a much older crowd, but I avoid youthful inexperience like the plague. It is much easier to date someone who knows what he/she wants and has experienced so that you can determine quickly what if anything you have in common. At the same time, I don’t need a woman in my life who is afraid to get her hair or lipstick messed up either. I like a woman who is equally comfortable in a black sheath at a formal event, or wearing cut off blue jeans in a field on a mountain somewhere or staring a server in the eye and ordering something on a French menu in Paris that looks interesting.

Experienced women who still have a desire to explore and experience new and more things are the best fit for me.

SlimNu

May 25th, 2011
8:40 am

Experienced men who still have a desire to explore and experience new and more things are the best fit for me ;-)

MC Hammock

May 25th, 2011
8:57 am

No question experience is the BEST. I did the regular dating thing (dating women my own agae) until at the age of 25, I was asked out by a 35 year old. Talk about a life altering experience! Mature women are more interesting, smarter, have the wiles of experience, more worldly…just everything that a 20something has X 10! I would never go back to dating the younger bunch…even if I could.

Also, if you haven’t made love to a 40 year old woman, you’re still a virgin.

TenderRoni

May 25th, 2011
8:58 am

I can say I have experienced both. I dated a guy six years younger than me, and last year I dated a guy nine years my senior. From my experience prefer the senior. But if I found a man that I have the three C’s with than I still would give it a go, no matter the age.

Both youth and a man experienced have their own separate issues. In my experience for instance, the youngin was not financial stable, and undecided with direction, didn’t plan for the future much. My older guy, oooohh he is set in his ways more, a bit more jaded when it comes to relationships.

Lana

May 25th, 2011
8:59 am

I prefer a little of both worlds. The young ones are still great to look at and touch, but they don’t have the “know how” of a more experienced man. Financially, there’s no comparison, obviously. Intelligence and conversation…still the more experienced guy. Basically, the young ones are really only good to look at and be seen with. I’ll take the experience (mature) man on a push.

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 25th, 2011
8:59 am

There’s a middle ground that lie on two ends of the spectrum.

That is, there’s “young” as in: hasn’t lived life, hasn’t had too many bad experiences, isn’t.yet.bitter/distrusting.

Then, there’s “experience” as in: seen it, done it, know it, and still looking for what I now know I turned away so many times.

I couldn’t tell you what the ranges are on the lower end of the age spectrum as I’ve always had an affinity for older women, but there’s something about a young, naive, and genuine person and an older, worn, and genuine person.

To each his/her own in that regard.

Wifey

May 25th, 2011
9:01 am

Depends on what you are looking for. A serious relationship, go with experience. For a roll in the sheets and that’s it, go with the younger guy. It’s not really difficult.

David

May 25th, 2011
9:03 am

VIVA LA COUGARS!!! Esperience is where it’s at!

abc

May 25th, 2011
9:08 am

It depends on your own age. More than 10 years in either direction is generally too much of a spread.

Simply

May 25th, 2011
9:11 am

I would prefer guys that are in their upper 30’s. I’ve dated older guys in their 50’s and their sex drive is totally absent…and thier blood pressure and other health issues comes into play. Guys that are in their mid to upper 30’s are usually the best! The majority of them do not have breast milk ( their mothers milk ) around their lips and they have a high sex drive and are very interesting…where as older men just will not get it for me! :)

Man's voice

May 25th, 2011
9:12 am

New to the blog. Great topic so wanted to include my input. I’m in my early 30’s and I’ve noticed with the younger girls 22-25 they are just out to enjoy themselves. They will be out with you on a date Thursday night and at the club/bar dancing away the next night. So if you’re looking for something with a little more substance to the relationship I wouldn’t be looking in this age range. Whereas the older girls 27+ have most of their party out by then and want to engage you more and get to know you. I would much rather have the girl with the more experience, steady career, more stability, better conversator etc. Lets be honest what does a 22 year old know about a real relationship? The one where every date was at the Frat house mixer doesn’t count.

Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)

May 25th, 2011
9:18 am

@ Simply “ouch”

As a philosopher I knew once stated, “I may not be as good as I ONCE was, but I am as good ONCE as I ever was!!!”

…and there ARE pharmaceuticals that can turn once into four or five times ;-)

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
9:31 am

Morning,

My preference is always somewhere in the middle. I don’t particularly want to date someone much younger simply because of what I feel would be compatability issues and I definitely don’t want to date a pops or cake daddy…lol

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
9:33 am

So my answer would be if somewhat younger than me, I’d have to see where we’re mostly compatable, meaning he’s experienced enough where we mesh. If older but experienced, he can’t be where I have to change his diaper and keep the pill box replenished :)

Fion

May 25th, 2011
9:34 am

‘If you have a choice, what do you prefer youth and someone that you may have to take your time with , or someone more experienced, who does not need you to hold their hand?”

Dude, Duuuuude! Really Dude.
22-26, if I met her Saturday it’s over and I’m gone by Tuesday.
Now that I’m north of 40 (not that far north either) beyond Banging her Brains out Bro it ain’t much else a mid 20 something chick can offer me.
……oh yeah put me in the experience (Mature) camp all day.

Lovely Brown

May 25th, 2011
9:40 am

Good Morning All! :-)

It depends on your own age. More than 10 years in either direction is generally too much of a spread

I agree with this. I dated a man 9 years older than me and it was an experience I’ll never forget.

On one hand, it was good for me because he showed me things that men my age( I was 21) were not even thinking about. On the other hand, he also used his age and experience to play with my young mind. But, eventually the student became the teacher :-) he taught me how to play the game. He was and probably still is a player. I learned a lot about men, good and bad from dealing with him.

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
9:45 am

The largest gap for me has been about 10 years…I was about 26/27 and he was 10 years my senior dated off and on for about 3 or 4 years. He had all the trappings but he was so dang grouchy that he came off as a kill joy. He was a pretty decent dude and for the most part and easily moved. If it’s possible, I can’t peg him as mean or hateful nor a whiner just fussy….all the dang time. The youngest that I had a relationship with was 4 years. I’ve gone on a date though with younger.

Foxy

May 25th, 2011
9:57 am

I’m such a COUGAR….I think Romeo is adorable.

The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)

May 25th, 2011
9:57 am

Morning, peeps…

On topic: I’ve never ventured more than 5 years in either direction (although, most everybody thinks Mrs. Swiss is considerably younger). Maturity is relative, anyway… But I’d tend to agree with abc — at some point, it’s just too much of a gap to have any real compatibility.

Now, gotta run to the store… I’m fresh out of Altoids…

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
10:04 am

Hey Swiss – Speaking of swirl…had a white dude to look me over nicely this morning. Started in the lobby. The elevators are mirrored and because he was staring so, I looked back at him and obviously he was waiting on that..I was tryna keep my eyes down. Yes, he looked with a “yep I’m looking” expression. I tell ya, he wasn’t half bad at all. For a hot second I wondered hmmm would I date a white dude….hmmm

Purple Rain

May 25th, 2011
10:04 am

I must say women in thier 40’s turn me on, mentally and physically. I am in my lower 40’s lol but something about a mature woman. Now a says they are in shape too. Yes 40 -53 is my range!

Lovely Brown

May 25th, 2011
10:09 am

I’m such a COUGAR….I think Romeo is adorable- Foxy

I guess that makes me one too…..I think he is smokin hot!

Now, gotta run to the store… I’m fresh out of Altoids- Swiss

Those altoids aint no joke….hell, I am still tired :-)

Bill Clinton

May 25th, 2011
10:19 am

I go for youth! ;)

Simple Man.....

May 25th, 2011
10:21 am

Morning Folks…..Great answers from all concerned today, In fact one of the very few times both the men and women seem to be on the same page….. :)

Hillary Clinton

May 25th, 2011
10:23 am

Bill,

GET OFF OF THIS BLOG!

Foxy

May 25th, 2011
10:26 am

Today, Foxy had a sexy chap that looked David Beckhamish to check me out in the lobby this morning, our eyes locked….That white boy was soooooooooooooo fine. Foxy is thinking about going back down stairs to accidentily bump into him. :)

Olderandwiser49

May 25th, 2011
10:33 am

First, I’d never date a woman (of any age) that refers to men as “dudes.” Too immature and Ninja Turtle-ish for me. French researchers determined that, if you are going to date down in age, you should never go younger than half your age plus seven years. This applies to teens as well as adults. There is just as big a maturity gap between 18 and 14 as there is between 40 and 25. Any greater difference than that becomes too diversly generational, and you’ll have nothing in common. While some older men have what appear to be trophy wives, if they fall within this “half + seven” framework, there is a very real possibility that the woman really did marry for love rather than for money.

Mike P

May 25th, 2011
10:39 am

I have dated both older and younger women.
Dating older women don’t necessary mean they’re more experienced, sometimes it just mean they’re more stuck in their ways and usually bitter and have way too many hangups about things that don’t have anything to do with me.

I would have to say you can put me in the younger crowd. I have way more fun with younger women and they’re more open in trying new things (adventurous); I love the feeling I get when I’m the first person they have ever tried new things with. Best ever!!!

Also, if you haven’t made love to a 40 year old woman, you’re still a virgin.
Well call me a virgin then, I can’t see myself having s3x with a forty year old… maybe when I get to be in my mid to late 40’s

Leggs

May 25th, 2011
10:40 am

Good morning.

“Experienced men who still have a desire to explore and experience new and more things are the best fit for me” Had to repeat.

Even though experience is preferred, don’t be a fuddy duddy because you’re experienced. Be youthful in spirit and the exploration process can be so much fun!

@Lovely Brown ~ dang girl, your mouth should be on fire (LOLOL)

TenderRoni

May 25th, 2011
10:42 am

I didn’t get a chance to post yesterday, but the altiods, halls, and peppermint trick has been dully noted to memory for further research…carry on!

abc

May 25th, 2011
10:44 am

Hey 19, we can’t dance together, no, we can’t talk at all.

Ed

May 25th, 2011
10:45 am

This past weekend, I had a lady who said she was 50 (I’m 38) making eyes and smiling at me. Gorgeous red hair and quite the body, even though she was prolly 5′2″. We made conversation and even kissed a little bit. She asked me if I wanted to have dinner over with her at her place. I agreed and on Saturday night I show up at her townhouse and she made an incredible seafood pasta dish. We started talking on the couch and she then said “Look, I’m not going to mislead you. I’m married and my husband had been in Iraq for almost a year. Are you still interested in tonight?”

Lemme see….he’s in the military, carries a gun and probably good at snooping out insurgents….hmmmm. I declined and even today, my buds are emailing me and telling me what a mistake I made in not servicing this lady. I think I prefer to saty alive, myself.

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
10:50 am

Olderandwiser49 – First, I’d never date a woman (of any age) that refers to men as “dudes.”

I guess count me out then :) Not only do I say dude, I sometimes say “chick” If ninja turtles comes to mind, more than likely it’s “how” you’re hearing it. I don’t think anyone on here speaks 1980 lingo

TenderRoni

May 25th, 2011
10:50 am

@Ed, glad you said her was 50, I thought you were talking about people I know.

I know one lady for sure is cheating on her hubby, and another friend I am suspicious about. Both have hubbies in the military and away.

Reggie

May 25th, 2011
10:54 am

Hey Ed, I speak from experience. Married ladies make the most over the top sexual experiences….when they are not with their hubby. It was a touch and go scenario and I tend to side with your buddies. You would have remembered that evening for a very, very, very long time.

abc

May 25th, 2011
10:56 am

Cheating with a married woman, especially one married to a deployed soldier, is a dog’s behavior. Your buddies are dead wrong, Ed. You too, Reggie. Anyone who does that should be forced to go over there and be on a bomb squad, if they can make it past all the married soldiers who would gladly kick their azz. Wimps. There are plenty of single women.

Blackfoote

May 25th, 2011
10:58 am

I like mature women and I’ve unsuspectantly approached younger women believing they were mature because that’s how they appeared. A couple I would have gone further with but I’m gentlemanly partial to women of a certain age and the younger ladies do appreciate the chivalry. A mature woman is with out any doubt the best scenario for my future.

Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)

May 25th, 2011
11:01 am

Reading Mike P’s comments, I have to say that the women in their 40’s have been the best lovers and the best friends by a wide margin. They know what to do, they know what they want (or as much as any woman knows what she wants ;-) a man does not have to do so much of that “courtship dance”…much better. And a big plus is that one can actually have good conversation when not in bed. Women in their 40’s are far and away the best in my opinion. Not even close.

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
11:03 am

Cheating with a married woman, no matter deployed or not is dog behavior….period. Reggie that seems to be the tone of most of your posts…when you do pop in…I agree you are just as wrong for suggesting he should have entertained that behavior.

The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)

May 25th, 2011
11:03 am

C — My apologies for staring earlier, but d@mn! You were looking fine this morning! ;-) :lol:

Leggs

May 25th, 2011
11:04 am

@Foxy ~ there’s this young buck that started dating here about a month ago. Ran into him in the cafeteria and I had a lot of bad thoughts jumping his bones (lol). I may go for it. Not sure, but am considering it. He’s a nice dip of chocolate.

Purple Rain

May 25th, 2011
11:04 am

Ed, glad you made the decision not to entertain a married woman. Your friends were trying to guide you down the wrong road. His wife can’t hold out for even a year, that’s terrible.

Purple Rain

May 25th, 2011
11:05 am

Randyt, I agree.

I like women who are Celisea’s age. LOL

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 25th, 2011
11:05 am

@RandyT

That 11:01 was right on.

In my experience, older women didn’t need the false pretense of “courtship” (see: there, been and that, done). If single and attractive, chances were they had their choice of men and just wanted some fun.

Which, back when I was dating, I was more than happy to provide.

Straight, no chaser – loved it.

Leggs

May 25th, 2011
11:07 am

Not dating here…started WORKING here!!!

Wifey

May 25th, 2011
11:07 am

I’m back for a few minutes and catching up. I’m 44 and really have no problem dating men many years younger than me. The youngest I ever went out with was 28. I think that the social infatuation with Cougars and MILFs is a well founded on. We are women through and through…not girls. I’ve left a few of the younger generation with a glassy stare and had great pleasure in doing so. Those in their late 30’s are better for my whims. No one really enjoys a 10 minute wonder boy very much.

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
11:08 am

His wife can’t hold out for even a year, that’s terrible.

Exactly and if she picked you up that easily, wonder how many and often she does that? I bet she does whether he’s deployed or not…skank behavior.

Celisea

May 25th, 2011
11:09 am

Swiss – My apologies for staring earlier, but d@mn! You were looking fine this morning!

That was you??!!! Dern it!

Leggs

May 25th, 2011
11:09 am

I’m with you Celisea. He’s fighting for our country and so his family can remain safe. She can at least keep her legs closed to enemy fire!