Love: Is your heart an idiot?
What is it about love and romance that tends to drive out rational thoughts and behavior? You can be a confident, brilliant person but once you fall in love you can tumble into a deep abyss of dumbness.
I read about a documentary by Found Magazine creator Davy Rothbart, called “My Heart is an Idiot”. The title struck me as funny but I actually have thought the same thing about my heart at times.
When you add emotion and sex to any dating “situation” you run the risk of getting caught up. Sure, you can try to pretend that it’s not happening, but it sometimes the dumb behavior starts.
You overlook red flags, you tolerate things you never thought you would, and then you somehow believe you’re in love. Do you think that we do the dumb things because are following our heart?
What do you think you learned from following your heart versus following your head (i.e. more logic, less emotion) in dating?
Of course there are no guarantees that you won’t ever get hurt, but what is the safest option? Wait, is safe even an option when it comes to love?!
What is the most idiotic decision you ever made about love?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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262 comments Add your comment
CoolShadow
May 24th, 2011
7:40 am
What is it about love and romance that tends to drive out rational thoughts and behavior?
I think it’s the quasi-druglike induced state some people go through when they’re in love. When it’s good, it’s euphoric and all’s right with the world. When it’s bad, it can bring out some of the worst emotions in people like anger and depression. Problems ensue when people in love don’t have a good counterbalance of emotion vs. rational thought.
You overlook red flags, you tolerate things you never thought you would, and then you somehow believe you’re in love. Do you think that we do the dumb things because are following our heart?
Yes because we’re following our heart and sometimes emotion can override logic or either have the mindset that we want to be in love. But you can’t will yourself to be in love, it just happens (or doesn’t).
What do you think you learned from following your heart versus following your head (i.e. more logic, less emotion) in dating?
Try to seek a happy medium between logic and emotion. If you drift too far toward one, it may cause a problem with your relationship. I tend to be more logical and it has created issues for me, but then having your nose wide open can set you up for trouble as well. And when in love, a lot of your emotional comfort lies within the behavior of the person you’re in love with, since you’re emotionally vulnerable and their actions will often dictate your direct responses to their actions.
What is the most idiotic decision you ever made about love?
This is probably best answered by perpetrators of crimes of passion.
IN DENIAL
May 24th, 2011
8:22 am
Jerimiah 17:9 will provide the answere to this discussion. The heart is the most treacherous & desperate thing you can rely on. Who can no it?
joe
May 24th, 2011
8:23 am
Some people fall in love too fast and too often so their hearts (and heads) are permanently idiotic. Slow down and get to know the person first!
IN DENIAL
May 24th, 2011
8:23 am
oops”Know”it. My Bad
Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)
May 24th, 2011
8:44 am
Have I ever done “dumb things” because of women, romance, sex, etc.??? I’ve only scratched the surface the last five years on here. Most of the time I look back and wonder if I did anything that wasn’t dumb. when it comes to relationships, I don’t get simple blinders on…I get a black garbage bag thrown over my head.
As I’ve said before, I’m not on here recounting the things I’ve done right…I’m here reflecting on all of the things I’ve done wrong, and hopefully learned from. I’ve had indicated before that I have no illusions about which is really the stronger sex…and the reason for that is that a woman’s “perfume” totally “effs” up a man’s head. He can be totally reasonable in work, in war, etc., but introduce a woman into the equation (the prettier the more dramatic the change) and he turns into a slobbering, blithering idiot. It is what it is.
Reality
May 24th, 2011
8:45 am
Yes it is. The heart does not deal in logic and rational. It looks past all of the blazing red flags and seeks only what makes it feel good…even if it’s for a short time. It is the part of you that becomes bored or disillusioned when things don’t go as planned and the brain says “See, I told you.” Women are 70% heart (emotion) and 30% mind (logic). Men tend to be 40% lust, 20% heart and 40% brain. Women see a picture of what they want and desire, sometimes since childhood. The feeling of being wanted and needed. They have the dreamy world of the princess and the prince riding off into the sunset to live happily ever after.
Men have that same dream, but comes woth a few extra links. Snow White is wearing stilletos, thigh highs and can barely wait until they get to the castle before she tears his clothes off. Then she asks if her super hot best friend can join in. LOL
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
8:48 am
Good morning and WOW
Big Un
May 24th, 2011
8:50 am
Most of the time, the heart becomes disappointed because the reality of the situation rarely lives up to the build up, at least after the first few months. I think that LUST is more realistic in it’s expectations. It focuses on the here and the now. The brain notices the red flags and files them away. It sends the “Spidey Sense” when the virus rears it’s head and says “OK, this is something you need to notice and deal with now.” The heart says “It’s OK. He/She is entitled to a few of these, but the heart doesn’t keep count. It dismisses them until the brain says “If you keep going in this direction, you’re gonna pay for it”. By this time the heart has on blinders until it’s too late.
I’ll stick with LUST, thank you very much.
Lana
May 24th, 2011
8:56 am
Never let your heart interfere with what your brain says. Most of the time, relationships don’t live up to the hype and while getting hurt or disappointed is unavoidable, it can be tempered. Deal with the REAL world and then see if your heart has any differing opinions. Food, Water and Sex rein supreme in the real world. Don’t believe me? Look at the media. The media is a form of satisfaction to the whims and wants of society. Tou gotta have food, you gotta have water and sex is on the mind of everyone. If love develops as a result, that’s icing on the cake.
Wifey
May 24th, 2011
9:01 am
There is no thing like love in reality…at least not in the rpmantic novel sense. Respect? Yes. Being considerate? Yes. But to hang your hat on Sleeping Beauty or Prince Charming as a standard love story is foolish and dumb. There is compatability and friendeship and aside from that, it’s all smoke and mirrors.
Ark2011
May 24th, 2011
9:02 am
If you want me, kiss like a hungry woman, move your hips like it’s attached by a ball socket and a libido a mile long and wide, my heart is with you. My brain says some pretty good things as well.
Fion
May 24th, 2011
9:19 am
What do you think you learned from following your heart versus following your head (i.e. more logic, less emotion) in dating?
Falling in Love. The emotional exchange. The giving of one’s self to another is tricky on a good day and can be down right treacherous the other 6days.
I don’t think I ever went into a relationship with a feeling of just falling and floating along aimlessly.
I dove in as a willing participant.
The key thing I learned is to know when it’s over and leave.
Fion
May 24th, 2011
9:20 am
P.S. In keeping with the fairytale theme,
Just remember Cinderella only went to the Ball once.
As long as you keep that in mind being a Hopeless Romantic can be Fun!
Leo
May 24th, 2011
9:40 am
What is the most idiotic decision you ever made about love?
Staying with the wrong person hoping it would get better and knowing deep down that it wouldn’t. Now that I am out of it and over it I have met a fantastic man and I am so much happier. It would have been best to listen to my mind….but like most people I held on until until I was finally pushed past my boundaries which MADE me make a change….
Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)
May 24th, 2011
9:43 am
“Wait, is safe even an option when it comes to love?!”
I ran the health and safety one time for a cell phone tower build. The guys whose job was to build it piece by piece up into the sky wore t-shirts that said “A life lived in fear is a life half lived”. Love is like that…if you hold back out of fear, then you only experience a small bit of the joy, the intoxication, the highs and lows that make love AND life worth living at all.
In other words, in spite of it all, jumping in with both feet is still the best way IMHO. Throw caution to the wind and savor the insanity.
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
9:47 am
Yeah, I harp on the reality of life v the fantasy all the time (on here and in real life).
Romantic movies are fictional, the stories your homegirls (homeboys too) tell you are edited heavily, and – most important- what you (or the people you ask for advice/ ibtch to) think your love should be has nothing to do with the reality when of the person you’re dealing with.
Being in love is a selfish emotion. It makes you think, act, and behave selfishly – like crack. Showing, receiving, and giving love should provide the real world context that informs your actions when dealing with your chosen mate.
Are you/she/he going to act stupidly – yeap; if you didn’t humans would propogate as a specie.
Should Love keep you on stupid – nope; not if it’s real and growing.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
9:49 am
Good Morning all!
Staying with the wrong person hoping it would get better and knowing deep down that it wouldn’t.
I have done this. But I really don’t think it was my heart that was keeping me tied…..
Good sex, no great sex is a helluva drug.
David
May 24th, 2011
9:53 am
I would like to think that following the heart, falling in love and staying in love is the end all, beat all. But life is the best, abet, cruel teacher. She gives you the answers first, then asks the questions. I will never, EVER get married again. Now if I can just get out of this one without being reduced to the pauper I was when I graduated from college. It doesn’t look that good…..
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
9:56 am
High 5’s Lovely Brown. I’ve stayed in relationships too long because we were simply golden when we were in bed together. Outside of that, we argued, did things differently and had different opinions about everything. But for those two hours, we managed to tolerate each other and enjoy it to the max. It is indeed a powerful drug and very addicting.
Big Un
May 24th, 2011
9:58 am
I’ll take the great sex over a LOT of things. It’s just hard to look past it with a clear head. Especially when you can say “This woman is head and shoulders, the best I’ve ever had….and probably will have.”
Fion
May 24th, 2011
9:58 am
@ Lovely
Sho ya right. I was involved in a bad relationship once. She was bad for me, I was bad for her, but Man oh, Man was the SEx ever great. I’ve never been hooked on drugs, but damn that Gilr had me strung out on that Thang!!!!
Fion
May 24th, 2011
9:59 am
I meant Girl…….
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
10:02 am
Wow… Big John Isner (Damn Good Dawg), actually managed to take a set off Rafa at Roland Garros… On serve in the 3rd…
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
10:12 am
Morning,
Ah yeah, been there done that. Mind altering sex..lol Like MCH said, in bed it was all good, out of bed and everywhere else it was chaotic and volatile. The more I was with him and the longer (aside from sex) the more I disliked him. As the saying goes, familiarity breeds contempt. As “pristine” as my rearing was he was the one and only dude that after so long a time of not liking one another, I evolved to doing the “do” with him, void of emotions, no feelings…just great sex. Only problem with that would be getting rid of him….ugh Yeah, that’s my kid’s father.
Have there been others that I’ve had an idiotic heart for? Not so much. Not saying there haven’t been times when I would have done different but an idiot for? Not really. IMO and strictly that, idiotics should lay to those of a certain age and time. No matter how much in love you think or feel, you should be able to discern when you treading dangerously stupid waters. Just my thoughts on this
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
10:15 am
“Do you think that we do the dumb things because are following our heart?”
That’s a rhetorical question, right?
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
10:19 am
Good morning! Nice comments.
Love: Is your heart and idiot! YEP! When the lustfulness abates, and you actually start dealing with each other on a more rational plane, perhaps you’ll be able to not have your nose stretched too wide open. This is when you can take off the colored glasses and see things with a clear lens. We all do stupid things in love, but when you deal with logic and with eyes wide opened, some idiotic antics hopefully can be avoided.
knockoutblonde
May 24th, 2011
10:20 am
Been there, done that. That’s what the term “Friends with Benefits” comes from. No strings attached, but you both know that in bed, you can blow each other’s doors off. I mean I dated the guy for as long as I did JUST because he could do things that STILL make me remember him fondly….and wish for a few more meetings with him. Ever heard someone say “I would date him just so I could **** him.” Well, he was that guy.
David
May 24th, 2011
10:23 am
That’s what got me where I am today. When we dated, we made adult movies look tame…and we did it any and every where. Every time I touched her with whatever body part seemed to make her jump like she had been touch with a live wire. Now, she says she just doesn’t think like that any more and we disagree about everything. I still don’t condone hiring someone to bump off your spouse…..but I understand it….
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
10:26 am
Morning All!
I’ve done dumb things because I was in lust or deep like. Yeah, staying with the wrong one way too long, hoping things would get better is at the top of the list.
The ones I’ve actually loved, a mature love, made me make more rational decisions regarding them. The love was not reckless.
I enjoyed fairytales as a child and romance novels and romantic comedies as I’ve grown older. But I never recall any of them having any influence over any decisions I’ve made in real life. I just can’t fathom that, though I suppose it happens since it comes up often on this blog. I’ve had it drilled in my head to just deal with the real.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
10:27 am
Anyone ever been sooo ‘in love’ with someone that you stayed around even though the bedroom tales were WACK? or does that only work when the bootay is good?
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
10:33 am
Morning
Your heart is not dumb, it’s genuine. We (our minds) are dumb for allowing the heart to pursue desire for desire’s sake, with no contraints or inhibitions. It is the mind’s job to determine when the pursuit of our desires is potentially adverse to our overall well-being.
David
May 24th, 2011
10:36 am
SlimNu, nope…doesn’t matter how we get along otherwise, if the bootay is bad, the deal’s off, Nyet, Nada, Ain’t gonna happen.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
10:37 am
David – Having a spouse snuffed is NOT okay…lol Don’t entertain that thought or the joy of too long please.
Fion
May 24th, 2011
10:39 am
Swiss if it goes down, it’s right up there with Buster Douglas vs. Tyson!
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
10:39 am
@Kimmie
You have no.idea how often people are trapped in that fantasy (of their own creation no less). The imbue the person with traits they don’t possess, attributes they don’t have, all in an attempt to reconcile their hearts to their minds.
For me, it (mature love) is/was being able to say “I don’t like that you do ‘x’, but I love/like you enough to deal with it.”
@SlimNu
Bad sex will get you a cab ride home, after the door is shut with my back to you talking on the phone (loudly) to my special friend.
So no, no staying for the D.
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
10:40 am
Holy Sh!t! Isner up 2 sets to 1 on Rafa at the French!
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
10:40 am
Daaaaaang, so seems like sex is a HUGE bonding agent for the sustainability of relationships…Being a great supporter, a great cook, a terrific mother to the kids etc all get negated if the puddy comes to a ZERO rating. Hmmm, interesting…
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
10:41 am
SlimNu, Nope, Nada, Nyet, Ain’t gonna happen. If the Bootay is bad, that’s the deal breaker no matter how well we get along otherwise. At my age, I don’t have the time or the desire to be teaching what goes where and for how long.
Fion
May 24th, 2011
10:43 am
@ Slim
That’s the counter balance (Great Sex) to all the negatives. Without that, to stick around you’d
have to be a masochist .
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
10:46 am
I still don’t condone hiring someone to bump off your spouse…..but I understand it….
@David- I do too….I fully understand
Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)
May 24th, 2011
10:47 am
Don’t think, just jump into the water. You can’t fully apprecicte the highs without experiencing the lows…and if you try to overthink or over analyze you will never make that leap of faith. By the way, remember what the first four letters of analyze spell.
Playing Doubles
May 24th, 2011
10:48 am
MCHammock 10:41 10:36
abc
May 24th, 2011
10:50 am
I think some of you are hormonal or something, with your singular fixation on sex. It’s like it’s what you live for.
Don’t blame your heart for being an idiot — you don’t think with your heart, it’s just a muscle. If you allow emotions to override rationale, then chances are yes, you’re being an idiot, or at least taking a big chance. I should know, I’ve been a complete idiot and taken very foolish chances in the past. Still do. Bummer.
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
10:51 am
SlimNu, yep it is. None of that would make a difference. Relationships always boil down to the two of you. Some people get so caught up in the kids, domestic stuff and other sidelines that they forget the most important things…each other. Since sex is a huge part of a relationship, if it played a large part in the compatability scheme and it isn’t there, that’s a recipe for disaster. maybe some people don’t put it very high on the totem pole, but I do. If you develop a disliking to it or you put it way behind the other parts, that’s when the dike starts crumbling. It’s OK for a brief period, but if it starts out that way, there’s no way to go but down.
Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)
May 24th, 2011
10:51 am
A very successful was once asked by a kid, what the secret of his success was. He answered, “I always jump at opportunities”. The kid then asked, “How do you know what is an opportunity?” The investor ansered, “you don’t, so you just have to keep jumping!”
Randyt (Been There, Done That, Got a Closet FULL of T-Shirts)
May 24th, 2011
10:52 am
a “successful investor” sorry.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
10:53 am
I agree with abc’s post. I think some things can and should be chaulked up to experience but repeated offenses only to laid blame to blinded by love is just an excuse. Age brings about a time of waking up and heightening your senses and “how” you experience. No one in their 30s, so forth and so on should be gullible.
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
10:56 am
@Slim
Those other things are important – no doubt.
But, if the sex isn’t good, there’s a space created for someone else to fill.
Not to say that great sex is anymore or less important than parenting, cooking skills, or being a good person/partner; just another area (sometimes a big one) where Mr. or Mrs. Charlie can come right on it and mess up a hole heap of stuff.
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
10:59 am
Dan – Fantasy of their own creation indeed. While I thought she was being a little harsh at the time, my mom forced me to always live in reality. I so appreciate that now. Makes life so much easier to deal with.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
10:59 am
SlimNu- I don’t think all those things get negated if real love is there.
Yes, I still believe in true love….I think I found it this time.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
11:00 am
MCH – Well what if you had a great relationship with someone and the sex was on point, but then something happens to your SO that would prevent her from having the usual sex yall were used to having???
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
11:06 am
but then something happens to your SO that would prevent her from having the usual sex yall were used to having???
Slim Most people would become John Edwards, even though they’ll deny it ’til they’re blue in the face.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
11:10 am
Dan – I appreciate your 10:56 since it offered a little more light as opposed to the mere, Sex-is-Wack-then-it’s-over spill.
I’m not sure if I say this because i’m a chick but I would assume that a man would have a harder time dealing with an issue preventing him & the SO from bumping and grinding, than a woman would if her dude couldn’t swang that thang.
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
11:17 am
SlimNu, I would hope that I would make an honorable decision, but the real world has a lot of vises. Lots of people, both men and women have made a dishonorable decision and life went on. I hope I would never have to make that decision, but to just say “I’d adjust” and stick with it is niave and not really thinking it through. Mean and cruel, probably, but there are divorces litering the world when satisfactory sex goes the way of the Dodo and lines are cut.
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
11:25 am
@Slim
If I can grind whichu, but not talk to you, not laugh with you, not be able to hang out with you, or not feel comfortable being me around you – then you aren’t my girl – you’re a temporary friend.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
11:28 am
@Slim?
I am not feeling ur posts today,unlike most days..sworry!
Look at that 10.40…ha? What’s that?
Are u on some ‘ sloppy pudy promotion’ today or what?
What’s ur brief today?
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
11:28 am
Rafa has awoken… up an early break in the 5th. Still a good effort by Isner — first man to ever take Rafa to 5 sets at the French…
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
11:31 am
The bad decisions that we tend to make in order to chase/keep the love high is not much different that a drug addict chasing a fix.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
11:38 am
Exiled – Oh come on mayne…I was just asking a question since everyone was putting so much emphasis on sex & being blinded by it when your mind knows you’re in a bad situation. Everything is peachy on this side of the world. So don’t chu worry your big head.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
11:40 am
Not quite SexxyCool,come on give urself a break!
U can get great sex and the guy can improve his ways….,sometimes and u keep the great sex up close!
Cocaine on the other hand? No way u can keeping snort it and turn ur lyfe around at the same time.
Now,to get a vixen for a wife,good fertile woman,good cook,fantastic personality all-round,keeps the house clean and did I say….
good freeeeaking vixen s3x,chandelier hanging,off that meter head,all that?!
That’s a woman to kill for!
good morning!
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
11:42 am
MCH – If you could no longer please your lady, would you allow her to get it somewhere else?
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
11:42 am
Knew I shoulda copywrote “chandelier hanging”…..
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
11:42 am
Sometimes you follow your heart sometimes you follow your mind. Make a wise decision after consulting both of them. Maybe I am different, I love sex and I like to have it. But it is not the mandatory must have, to me it’s maybe 20% of a factor in the relationship. Laugh if you want but I don’t even think I would break up with someone if the sex was less than stellar, I would enjoy it for what it is and be thankful I have the other 80% and it’s not so important for me to go out and get my rocks off and risk losing that 80% that I do like just for a outstanding orgasm.
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
11:44 am
Um…yeah…Meelow…I didn’t mean in all aspects, dude.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
11:45 am
To the person who emailed me to check if we got hit by the storms, I responded to your email yesterday. Maybe it went in your junk folder. We are fine and thank you for checking on us. The storms were way south of were we live.
(virtual hugs to you)
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
11:54 am
Inquiring minds want to know
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
11:54 am
MCH – If you could no longer please your lady, would you allow her to get it somewhere else?
oooooo, this is a good question!
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
11:56 am
Not really. I don’t want to know if you would let your woman get it elsewhere if she ain’t happy. Seriously I would hope that’s not even a question
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
11:57 am
I’m just a little bored right now
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
11:59 am
SlimNu, I might hate it, but I would understand. To do other wise is self serviant and slightly selfish. She could certainly stay if she CHOSE to and I would do the best with what I have. But in the end, it would be her choice and I would understand.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
12:01 pm
MCH – Not to pick on you (any of the fellas can answer this)..yall say sex is a big part of a relationship/courtship…so if they couldn’t do the actual do but could still swing the Oral stuff, would that suffice or does it have to include pipe slanging & banging?
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
12:03 pm
Of course that would be for her to divorce me and move on with her life. Not stay married and she find others to service her.
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
12:06 pm
It would actually have to a bridge crossing when I came to it situation. Some people can get by with it and some can’t. I’ve had partners that enjoyed one more than the other and others just prefer the real deal to anything else. But is she said that I HAVE to have _____ and I couldn’t provide that, as bad as I would hate it, it’s the real world
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
12:08 pm
Don’t the vows say something about “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health”?
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
12:09 pm
In my personal experience, oral is great, but it can’t hold a candle to the real thing.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
12:10 pm
Okay, I think I’m done with my line of questioning your honor
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
12:15 pm
SlimNu!
I will bite!
If its just Oral then she better be on some chronic six sigma continous Improvement kinda programme/ type,certified Oral….knwwhatimean??
Big Un
May 24th, 2011
12:17 pm
Swiss, the vows say a lot of things in addition to all of that, but the divorce rate is still at 62% for first marriages and higher for second marriages. The only time people pay attention to them is when they are being uttered at the alter. Sad, but true.
MC Hammock
May 24th, 2011
12:17 pm
I know, Swiss. But reality makes liars of us all.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
12:20 pm
Celisea, you are my only woman that I will allow to get it somewhere else because you are not my woman. LOL If my current woman got it in from somewhere else she might as well get in the grave.
Willie Dynamite
May 24th, 2011
12:20 pm
Afternoon All,
Not much to add to the topic. For me personally I can honestly say I never really dealt with all the emotional angst. For the longest time I was pretty much void of emotional attachment when dealing with Women. From as far back as I can remember now looking back on it I was pretty callous when it came to matters of the heart. So no it wasnt any brain VS heart battles in this camp.
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
12:22 pm
MCH — Not all. Maybe most, but not all.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
12:23 pm
Big Un, have you read the latest states on marriages?
http://abcnews.go.com/US/long-lasting-marriages-rise-us-census-report/story?id=13638606
“Marriage is actually becoming more stable in America and divorce is becoming less common.”
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
12:28 pm
I just actually read Hill Harper’s The Conversation for a co-ed book club meeting that TheDude and I are going to. And I have to apologize for my assumptions about the book prior to actually reading it. This is not the standard The-Rules-Steve-Harvey-I’ma-tell-you-how-to-get-a-man-in five-steps book. It is an actual exploration and conversation about the relationships, relating, what we’re getting wrong, what we are getting right. It is very well done.
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
12:43 pm
@SC
Letters to Young Brothers/Sisters are good reads as well.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
12:50 pm
‘Marriage is actually becoming more stable in America and divorce is becoming less common’
Is that because it’s harder for folks to afford divorce right now? lol
cba
May 24th, 2011
12:52 pm
PR,I’ll consign on your 11:42 I had passionate sex Friday nite/Sat morning. Later on Sat. after spending 3 hours in the yard working/cutting grass, I said to myself, oh, I had sex earlier this morning. Point is, sex is just one of the activities that goes on my life. Maybe it because I’ve had sex with her a gazillion times…..damn boring marriage
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
12:52 pm
cba, LOL!
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
12:53 pm
SexyCool – I read some of that book and I was sort of surprised that the guys admitted the chicks they married weren’t that adventurous in the bedroom as some of the chicks they dated prior to the nuptials
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
1:00 pm
Willie – I don’t believe the wives were around.
Willie Dynamite
May 24th, 2011
1:00 pm
Slim – They must have admitted that when they Wives were not around. hahaha
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
1:09 pm
Is that because it’s harder for folks to afford divorce right now? lol
Slim Funny but actually true.
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
1:13 pm
It just proves what some have said on this forum in the past – Being the biggest freak is not a guaranteed pathway to *the ring.*
Although, I’m sure none will argue that it doesn’t hurt at all.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
1:26 pm
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
1:13 pm
It just proves what some have said on this forum in the past – Being the biggest freak is not a guaranteed pathway to *the ring.*
Although, I’m sure none will argue that it doesn’t hurt at all
Actually, it might…..some people are funny like that.
If you are too ‘experienced’ they will get down with you…..but marry you? Oh hell no! No one I know wants a female ho or male ho for a spouse.
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
1:29 pm
My coworkers just surprised me with a big bridal shower luncheon! They had such nice things to say about me and gave me some great gift cards!
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
1:32 pm
I agree with Lovely.
kimmie, when do you get married?
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
1:33 pm
There is a discussion about that very thing in the book.
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
1:35 pm
Congrats Kimmie – well deserved I’m shure
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
1:37 pm
To me, it doesn’t make sense, especially given how dudes are always talking/posting about how important sex is, that they would then marry someone who they would expect to temper their sexuality/sexual creativity. Then these same dudes turn around and complain about not being fulfilled sexually and having to go outside the marriage because she won’t stand on her head or perform Janet Jacme tricks.
smh…
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
1:37 pm
Purple – June 4
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
1:38 pm
Thanks Dan
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
1:43 pm
@SC
That’s the thing. I don’t know a cat that married someone he considered “average” or less in bed. Not that guys discuss their sex lives with their SO’s like that, but I’ve not once in life heard a dude say my wife/girl/etc is bad in bed.
So guys marrying the “meh” in bed chick is strange and unheard of in my humble experience.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
1:55 pm
kimmie
lol
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
1:58 pm
Dan – They didn’t say their wives were bad in bed…just that they weren’t as adventurous than the chicks from their dating lives. There is a difference. Seems to me though, since it’s sooooo important that a man would want someone who was a little explorative…but not Wide Azz open tho
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
1:59 pm
You want someone with potential not one who is a master all ready and has been run thru while her skills were being honed.
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
2:01 pm
@Slim
Unadventurous (ultimately)= bad
Thing is, if a dude waits (or a female asks him to wait) until after marriage to do some isht, that’s buying a car without a carfax IMO.
Again, sex isn’t the single most important element but part of a complex equation. But it does throw every other input off if it ain’t right.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
2:05 pm
I have a guy friend of mine who just got married within the last 90 days. His wife is a super Church-goer, doesn’t believe in really drinking or being all crazy, grew up in the church blah blah blah. By his own admission he stated she wasn’t that adventurous in bed and he would have to work on getting her guard down. However, he is a super freak or at least was when he was single. So not sure how hes going to handle that
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
2:10 pm
Slim a man knows he can turn his woman out anyway he wants to. So it’s up to him how freaky he wants to make her.
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
2:11 pm
You want someone with potential not one who is a master all ready
Purple – Well then it seems a lot of guys aren’t good at spotting real potential.
Thing is, if a dude waits (or a female asks him to wait) until after marriage to do some isht, that’s buying a car without a carfax IMO.
Dan – That would just be my luck. At the very worst, just end up with someone I am not intimately compatible with. And yes, it would throw everything off.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
2:12 pm
@ Kimmie- that was sweet of your co-workers, hope you enjoyed yourself.
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
2:12 pm
Just because my wife isn’t freakier than the freakiest chick I ever dated doesn’t mean she isn’t freaky enough. I mean some of that freaky ish is “been there, seen what it was like” kinda stuff anyway. Now that I’ve done it I don’t really need to do it again.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
2:13 pm
kimmie, I would think that they are and just keeping it to themselves.
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
2:14 pm
@PR
I know some real sales people.
Some that have sold a bill of goods prior to the rang, only to find out “no means no (even then)”
Shameful isht too
LeeH1
May 24th, 2011
2:15 pm
Desire overcomes logic, and rationalization rules the day. This same situation is seen with “Gold Fever” when otherwise smart people make dumb decisions because they think the decisions will make them rich. This can be done all by themselves, or helped along by confidence men and women. Men use women’s desires to be loved and valued to make the women unloved and valuless. Women use men’s desires to be loved and valued to make the men poor and discarded after the money is gone.
Smartness has never been a shield against desire. Sometimes, the smarter you are, the more stupid the mistake. After all, if you are too dumb to understand the payoff, you are too dumb to bet much.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
2:15 pm
Some that have sold a bill of goods prior to the rang, only to find out “no means no (even then)”
Shameful isht too
Yes, that is shameful. That’s when an anullment would be the order of the day…..nip it the bud at the first NO
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
2:15 pm
PR – I would never cheat on you….only because you will allow me to
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
2:18 pm
Well, he would always talk about how he needed a woman in the bedroom and that his lady was a bit ‘immature’ in that area. Well, they have the rest of their lives to get right in that dept.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
2:18 pm
Dreams – Just because my wife isn’t freakier than the freakiest chick I ever dated doesn’t mean she isn’t freaky enough. I mean some of that freaky ish is “been there, seen what it was like” kinda stuff anyway. Now that I’ve done it I don’t really need to do it again.
Maybe I’m too “vanilla” but freak ‘em ain’t for everybody. Rationing skills on every encounter IMO tends to downplay your skills. I’m of the mindset that your best skills should be done with a special lover/love/husband.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
2:18 pm
I’m of the mindset that your best skills should be done with a special lover/love/husband.
Me too, you don’t pull out your best china for every dinner……
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
2:27 pm
I’m of the mindset that your best skills should be done with a special lover/love/husband.
Celisea So suppose I’ve had three special women in my life, the last one eventually becoming my wife. Maybe my wife isn’t as “freaky” as the two before, but that doesn’t mean that she’s a dud or that her sexual appetite isn’t enough for me. But that seems to be the argument that was being made.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
2:27 pm
Celisea, LOL have fun!
How does one master their bedroom skills, by trial and error, naturally gifted, quick learner, or just had some other person train them?
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
2:29 pm
Lovely – It was wonderful!
Purple – Yeah, they could be keeping it to themselves, keeping it private. But when it’s bad, you sure seem to hear about it after awhile.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
2:30 pm
What if you think your potential mate is not measuring up…and quiet as kept they are thinking the same thing about you?
Angel
May 24th, 2011
2:32 pm
When I did let my guard down, he gave me his arse to kiss….no longer wearing my heart on a chain….my man has gotta work for it.:)
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
2:33 pm
kimmie, lol that would be the worse…talkiing to your mate about a lack of bedroom skills then they respond with “you are no spring chicken yourself” LOL
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
2:34 pm
Purple – Then you are both on the same page!
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
2:35 pm
my man has gotta work for it.:)
Angel Are you putting in just as much work for for his heart?
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
2:36 pm
Slim!
If a chic is young to relatively young,and dude is young too,the most complaining attribute is not her sexual prowess. It’s most def her character and most dudes will want to train her themselves or learn tgerher at best.
Now if the chic is much older and dude is about same age or older,in his mind he knows she a run thru so he is happier if her prowess measures up and she the general character is good. At an older age I would think that folks communicate about s3x more openly than they do at a younger age. That’s a plus. At that age,why marry a dud?
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
2:38 pm
Compelling attribute
and the general character
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
2:38 pm
That’s what I’m saying,
If you know this is the person you want to be with, why would you not share yourself with them fully? Why wait till after marriage to take them to the storage unit and then show them the bag of hair?
Or, wait til then to pull out the chains, whips, ball gags, and midgets only to find out they ain’t into all that?
Shenanigans!! I call Shenanigans!!
Just seems like bad logic/poor presentation to me.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
2:40 pm
‘How does one master their bedroom skills, by trial and error, naturally gifted, quick learner, or just had some other person train them?’
Master of bedroom skills would be contingent upon whoever is on the receiving end…what is master-like skills to one, may fall into the DUD category for another.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
2:42 pm
Well, why do some dudes attribute a chick being comfortable with her sexuality or sexual ability to being a ho back in the day or having many partners??? One does not have to have slept with many in order to be good at ssexing…just like some folks didn’t have to go to school for many years to be good a drawing, it may just be natural.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
2:42 pm
..be good AT drawing…
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
2:43 pm
what is master-like skills to one, may fall into the DUD category for another.
Slim But the question still remains though. How do they come about those skills? Or do you just like your dude to be a blank slate that you can mold the way you want? lol
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
2:45 pm
Dreams – Maybe my wife isn’t as “freaky” as the two before, but that doesn’t mean that she’s a dud or that her sexual appetite isn’t enough for me
She may not be as “freaky” as the two before her (they could be total freakazoids…lol) but I tend to think and my experience is, even with inhibitions, if you love and feel that person to a level that surpasses, he can usually bring out all your secrets and skills. So with that said, no she may not be freaky to the degree of the other two but I suspect you would be skilled enough to bring her to a plateau that’s satisfying and gratifying enough to keep you pleased and interested.
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
2:45 pm
“…what is master-like skills to one, may fall into the DUD category for another.”
I hope not the “DUD” category. If one deems it “master-like,” hopefully another would at least give it a rating of “Good.” To drop from master-like to DUD is comical.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
2:46 pm
What about some of those people who have not been introduced to certain things? Someone has to bring the subject up. You may like stuff a certain way but that is totally foreign and unknown to your partner.
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
2:46 pm
Celisea’s 2:45 is spot on.
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
2:47 pm
Slim: “The Natural”
Now picturing sparks flying out of Slim’s CT as she rounds 3rd & heads for home…
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
2:47 pm
Slim!
Lie!
U don’t become good in bed without practicing ur craft. You don’t necessarily have to be a ho(u can call urself whatever u want tho, men have the last wrd on that!)
U can sleep with a few and then be good,depends if u a quick study.
I doubt that’s how most of u became good tho!
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
2:47 pm
And maybe not always hinged on this —>if you love and feel that person to a level that surpasses, he can usually bring out all your secrets and skills.
but feeling a dude something crazy coupled with “skills” ummm, you can take it where you want to go with it.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
2:49 pm
How do they come about those skills? Or do you just like your dude to be a blank slate that you can mold the way you want?
Dreams – Of course I don’t want a perfectly blank slate at this juncture in my life because I don’t want the headache of having to Tell him every single little thing. I would assume that experience or skills would come from having some sort of trial run, whether it was with one chick that took the time to show him the ropes or a couple. I don’t live in the fairytale land thinking that any guy I meet is a virgin. Yes, i would like some room for us to try some NEW things out or be open to exploration but not have to come to the table twirling my thumbs hearing crickets in the background lol
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
2:50 pm
PR – 2038…looking forward
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
2:51 pm
Regardless of the history/experience that I had prior to TheDude, the connection that we share makes me more at ease with him than I have ever been in the past.
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
2:52 pm
but I suspect you would be skilled enough to bring her to a plateau that’s satisfying and gratifying enough to keep you pleased and interested.
Celisea Exactly my point…love it when you think how I want you to. j/k lol What other chics have done has nothing to do with who I make my wife. If I wife her, then she has what I want/need. So what you up to this weekend? Was thinking about going to the “plateau”..wanna come?
Dan - Simply....Superior
May 24th, 2011
2:53 pm
@PR
I disagree.
Catch any female, at the right time, and she ain’t een gotta know his name for ‘it’ to come out.
That waiting until love/feeling isht is gabage and bad strategy.
@Dreams
Do you really care? Google search her name and nicknames and as long as it wasn’t Ray J, some or all of any sport teams, does it matter?
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
2:54 pm
Dreams – love it when you think how I want you to……So what you up to this weekend? Was thinking about going to the “plateau”..wanna come?
We channeled on this one
We can swing the weekend but I can’t speak to plateaus and stuff.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
2:54 pm
I wld luv to hear TheDude say the same thing about that connection(regardless of ur sexual history) to me…
,in your absence!
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
2:56 pm
Sometimes a connection & chemistry with a person will make you not think twice about going into “THE FURTHER” or in other words, go beyond the point of no return lol (Insidious reference) So folks bring out certain things in you that others may not be able to do.
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
2:58 pm
Leggs – If one deems it “master-like,” hopefully another would at least give it a rating of “Good.”
Not necessarily. Someone could be a master at a particular sexual skill that turns another person off. So, it doesn’t matter how skilled a person is if their partner is not into that.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:01 pm
Slim?
You FUUNNY…!!!!!!
Sometimes a connection &chemistry with a person …..make u not think twice….?
Your heart becomes the Idiot at that Point!
Yea,the S3xcual Chronic is calling at that point!
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
3:03 pm
Swiss – I wasn’t calling myself a “Natural” by any means…I like to fly in stealth mode.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
3:05 pm
‘Sometimes a connection &chemistry with a person …..make u not think twice….? Your heart becomes the Idiot at that Point”
Exiled – I wasn’t even figuring in “heart” at this juncture…speaking basically and plainly on sex and acquiring ’skills’ or being open to something new. It doesn’t take a heart to do that. DUH!
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:09 pm
I hear what you’re saying SexyC. That’s why I said hopefully. It sure would be a downer from hearing something was “masterful” to now hearing, “dud”. It’s all relative, everyone won’t like every act…I get that.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:10 pm
Slim…ok
but define that relationship with the person for me.
I didn’t knw females just go on strictly ’s3x skill acquiring sojourns’!
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
3:10 pm
Celisea, I am going to get a 2038 T-Shirt.
One dude may think a woman is awesome in bed then the next dude think she is subpar and a bore. It is what YOU make it..IMO
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
3:16 pm
“I wasn’t calling myself a “Natural” by any means…”
Slim — I was doing it for ya, boo…
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
3:20 pm
‘I didn’t knw females just go on strictly ’s3x skill acquiring sojourns’’
Exile – Please get the dried wang juice out of your ears as I speak slowly. You need to stop twisting my words around. I never said we went out on skill acquiring sojourns…No chick leaves the house and says, “Alright, I’ll be back some time tonight. I’m going to my next oral skills class, or back that thang up class etc.”
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
3:22 pm
There are folks who take time to research, read, study and learn prior to practical application to increase their skill level.
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:23 pm
How many here have read as a means of mastering a particular sexual skill??
Purple Rain
May 24th, 2011
3:26 pm
Reading is fundamental.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:28 pm
How many here have read as a means of mastering a particular sexual skill??
Not me…I was taught all I didn’t instintively know
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:29 pm
Yep, and actual hand’s on experience can be a better learning tool. All depends on where you’re at.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:29 pm
PR – Celisea, I am going to get a 2038 T-Shirt.
Get me one too please…
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:30 pm
Slim!
U need to stop denying the obvious….the one guy with whom u had that connection with, brought u to the ‘Idiot’ zone coz at that point ur heart made u do to Alex what u didn’t do for Joe dud se3xually I mean. And Alex made u realize u can f@)ck this shut like crazy and by the time the Fed somnambulist guy came,u were a 4.5437326 on the ricter scale.
Do don’t be telling me u weren’t figuring ur heart etc coz the heart figures for u and gets u experienced!
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:30 pm
Thank you, Celisea. I’ve never read either.
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:31 pm
How many of you read Exiled’s post 2x???
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:32 pm
So dont
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
3:32 pm
Exiled – Um…WHAT?! (In my Lil Johns voice) I was not necessarily speaking from personal experience dude. I was speaking in GENERAL terms.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:33 pm
Leggs – I was about to speak to MMEELLOO and decided against it because that would be an almost admission that I’ve been skipping his posts…lol Not for anything back but they just seem so convoluted and I’m not up to deciphering or decoding today
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:34 pm
not for anything bad…not back
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
3:36 pm
Celisea – I’m about to get to the point where I just skip over his nonsense too.
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:37 pm
@Exild ~ So don’t what, Read? It was a question for the masses. Just getting their take. I never asked if I should read or not read. I’ve decided a long time ago what I wanted to do!
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
3:38 pm
Leggs – notice I said “prior to practical application.”
To assume that the only way to increase your sexual skills is by doing would be like saying that the only way to learn a job is by on-the-job training. If that’s the case, why do we go to school, read and study to learn a trade?
And for me, when I want to become better at something, I read and research it first and then take what I have read about and see how it works out in real situations….sometimes to the good…sometimes not.
But then too….I guess I’m a nerd like that.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:38 pm
Slim.u made me lol with that ‘nonsense’ thang
that’s the orgasm I was looking for
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:40 pm
@Leggs!
‘So don’t’ was a typo correction to 3.30 ‘Do don’t
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:40 pm
Oh no, never said that’s the only way to increase your sexual skills. Just thought to ask how many also goes that route. No doubt if I wanted to know about something I would research it, I just haven’t researched it in the sexual arena…that’s just me!
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
3:40 pm
So don’t what, Read?
Leggs
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:42 pm
SlimNu – 3:36….lololol That was funny.
SexyC – I’m not knocking reading, there much to be said from a book…I agree. But there are some folks that have acquired skills by getting their training on the job. I guess I see practice or book skills both as a means to an end. I don’t have any formal education and really for every position I’ve had in this organization since 2004 it’s been sink or swim. Mastered by way of experience. Good thing I can swim…lol
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:45 pm
SexxyCool 3.38!
U funny too girl….
Where do u learn that…..on the net I presume.
And the net is what 15 years old? And learning on the net as u and I know it now was nor like that 10 years ago.
So u did what 10 years ago? Bought books to learn about s3x and all…
Quit playing girl!
U aint fooling me with that
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:47 pm
Personally I won’t read books on child rearing because frankly that crap unfolds from day to day and you NEVER know which day you want to strangle the little seed… Of course I wouldn’t read up on sex or relationships either. I don’t think a book can encompass the many facets we tend to go in life. Unless a book captures the experience of many, that person may be an expert but IMO that’s their experience. Heck I’m an expert with my experience
Anyway, that’s for another day. I will though read books on illnesses (symptons, medicines, etc), on different kind of foods, biographies, life stories but not on issues where each one of us differ depending upon experience…like I said though that’s for another day
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
3:48 pm
Meelow – The Internet as we know it dates back to at least 1983, actually prior to, but that’s neither here nor there in this instance.
The Joy of Sex was first published in 1972 – the year I was born.
The Kama Sutra dates back to the second century.
I promise you folks have been writing about sex since prior to 1996.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
3:48 pm
How many of you read Exiled’s post 2x???
I am cracking up! LOL!
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:50 pm
And if u read books about s3x wldnt u be better served reading about a trade and gotten a degree,diploma,certificate..smething?
I aunt buying the read to get sxual experience nonsense!
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:50 pm
MMEELLOO….behave and quit tryna push folks’ buttons
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
3:52 pm
Leggs – I admit I did read about a particular “technique” and then “practiced” it. According to the guy, I got an “A”! LOL!!
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:55 pm
Celisea
Ok
but I’m not feeling some of this fronting
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:56 pm
@Exiled ~ “Do Don’t” doesn’t sound any better. I think I need an Advil.
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
3:57 pm
I see what you’re saying with So Don’t and in place of Do Don’t. I’m still taking that Advil because of you!
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
3:57 pm
So don’t
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:58 pm
Well I had a post guess it was tossed out. Anyway I was saying for all those subjects where I’m not too fond of personal writings from a declared expert, I will read the Bible. And I was saying Solomon even said 3 things too wonderful for him to know…one being the way of a man with a maid. See the awes of sex have been around since folks been having…..I’m veering off again
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
3:59 pm
Meelow….you don’t know what I read or what I know.
I am quite satisfied with the career path and the life that I live. It is you who is quite obviously lacking the basic knowledge that a trade, degree, diploma, certificate or whatever does not guarantee success, wealth, happiness or quality of life.
But even more than that, I really don’t have defend any of my life choices to you and could care less about what you buy, believe or think.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
3:59 pm
Hey there MMEELLOO – You come back with a bang huh?
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:01 pm
U can read all u want about s3x,from the Bible even…
but u practice that which u read and get to know if it’s good or bad….at least on a live man and his diiiick!
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:02 pm
I admit I did read about a particular “technique” and then “practiced” it.
This is a good segue for a question I have. A childhood friend of mine recently told me about the effects of giving her husband oral chex with an Altoid or a Halls in her mouth….said it curled his toes and he almost had her head in a leg lock. Is this true?
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
4:03 pm
Sassy – same thing with peppermint.
Fion
May 24th, 2011
4:03 pm
Here, here!!!
Leave us not become agitated.
I think a field trip to Trapeze will solve a lot of this.
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:04 pm
@SassyMe ~ have you ever used ice cubes while engaging in that area? I can see the altoids or halls. Most definitely.
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:05 pm
I tried to tell him last week not to get banned again, but it seems like it has fallen on numb fingers.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:05 pm
SexxyCool?!
I am not denigrating what u read….on s3xxx
I am not bieving that u wld make that decision to invest in books on that subject to get to the level u
may be on now!
And I’m not saying ur career path is good bad or blah… I am
Just saying I don’t see ur level head investing that much in that subject like that..
I just thought u were gon say all ur previous partners have helped u become the woman u are today,for the good of TheDude!
Right? and not a library of books?
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:05 pm
Once again, my post is now above SlimNu’s.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
4:06 pm
You seem to be a bit on edge trying to annoy everybody. You and the Mrs get into a little scuffle of sorts recently? The couch not as comfy as the bed?
Sassy1
May 24th, 2011
4:06 pm
Well, well lookey heres….no one was swooped up!! LOL
Happy Hot Azz Tuesdays…grown folks!
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:09 pm
Celisea/Slim?!
U like it better when we All agree on a topic?
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
4:10 pm
MMEELLOO, are you a glutton for punishment? Now you was all sad and stuff and emailing different ones of us from the sidelines, all the while waiving. You back in and just showing your behind. You better straighten up
Next time might be the point of no return.
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
4:10 pm
You’re
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:10 pm
“Now you was all sad and stuff and emailing different ones of us from the sidelines, all the while waiving. You back in and just showing your behind. You better straighten up Next time might be the point of no return.”
Needs to be said a third time!!!!
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
4:12 pm
MMEELLOO – I’m good with you…I know you’re just wanting to get a rise or strike some sort of debate
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
4:12 pm
Okay….. altoids, halls, ummmm what happens if you have a mate that has sensitive parts?
I would not want to be tryin’ to be adventurous and it end up torturous
kimmie
May 24th, 2011
4:12 pm
Sassy – A friend told me about toothpaste years ago.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:14 pm
Sexxy!
fine but all I’m saying is everybody puts that to practice on the opposite sex.
So why is this offending to anybody!?
Me included!
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
4:15 pm
And I never implied that the only way I gained experience/knowledge was through reading.
I just read…a lot…and I read on a very wide variety of subjects. And prior to my last move and receiving a Kindle as a gift, I had a shtload of books on many subjects.
And quite frankly, ANYbody who has read this blog, for any length of time, even if it’s the only reading that you have ever done in your life, has read about and discussed sex.
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:15 pm
same thing with peppermint.
have you ever used ice cubes while engaging in that area?
Yeah I’ve done that but I feel cheated just now finding out about the peppermint n halls n stuff…
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:15 pm
“….what happens if you have a mate that has sensitive parts?” Wear a helmet! Therefore the smacks to the head won’t hurt. Better yet, he won’t be able to grab your head….wait, that might be fun!
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
4:16 pm
The men are sitting in the cut reading, while Exiled is instigating something
Yes ma’am
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:16 pm
A friend told me about toothpaste years ago
What?! Soo umm okay then I’m glad I know now…can’t get to Bermuda right now but Imma fo sho have to test that technique out at some point. Thanks for sharing….
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:16 pm
that was suppose to be grab your hair….
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
4:17 pm
Lovely – “I would not want to be tryin’ to be adventurous and it end up torturous.”
Sometimes, that’s the only way you find out. It’s how I learned that if you use milk-based whipped cream and you don’t get it all off, that sht will have the whole room sour come morning.
Willie Dynamite
May 24th, 2011
4:18 pm
Alrighty then, perfect time to step back in. Ladies please continue trading notes.
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
4:18 pm
@ Leggs- you gon get me banned from my bedroom talkin about wearing a helmet LOL!
Head grabbing always happens
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:18 pm
, unless you’re comfy having the candy in your mouth at the same time, I’d proceed with caution.
And don’t let him have a hook…one might choke if one isn’t skillful
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:18 pm
The men are sitting in the cut reading, while Exiled is instigating something…
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
4:20 pm
A good swish of Listerine can give you similar effects…it wears off faster than a mint or anything else would. However, unless you’re comfy having the candy in your mouth at the same time, I’d proceed with caution.
Exiled – No we don’t have to all agree. There is nothing wrong with a nice debate or battle of opinions but I think we’re basically talking about you being an ass hole
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:20 pm
Leggs..I’m not instigating…havent called nobody names
Where is the instigation in honest debate?
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:20 pm
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
4:21 pm
Sometimes, that’s the only way you find out. It’s how I learned that if you use milk-based whipped cream and you don’t get it all off, that sht will have the whole room sour come morning.
oh hell no.
I can only imagine….and it is cracking me up!
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:23 pm
It may be honest debate, but it’s the way you’re saying it. Pretty sure you’ve heard, “it’s not what you say, but how you say it.” We get you, but management won’t if you keep it up. Rein yourself in.
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:24 pm
We in some kind of time warp on this blog?? Been noticing that with the comments lately…not that it changes anything.
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
4:27 pm
See, Lovely…the things you can learn just reading about sex. (lol)
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:28 pm
Leggs!?
ajc management can swallow my diick
Lovely Brown
May 24th, 2011
4:29 pm
Everyone have a good and safe evening…..imma get me some altoids on the way home
I’m outta here
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:29 pm
I know Sassy Me. Answers are going before the questions…
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:30 pm
You know what, Exiled. You spit that crap now, but you were spitting a different tune a few months ago. You missed being here and most of us missed you and even petitioned ajc management to bring you back on. Swiss even fasted a few days in the hopes of getting you back on. He wore that stinking tee-shirt for months and this is how you show your appreciation by sticking your nose in the air to “management.” No disrespect, but you sound like a big bad beast here on the blog, but you were mild, meek wanting to get back on. If you want to stay on, then act accordingly and reel some of that in….that’s all!
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
4:31 pm
See, Lovely…the things you can learn just reading about sex. (lol)
Mmm hmmm, cause I didn’t know about Altoids either
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
4:32 pm
Everyone have a good and safe evening…..imma get me some altoids on the way home I’m outta here
Why did I just picture Lovely Brown, running with keys and purse in hand?? LOL
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:33 pm
…..imma get me some altoids on the way home
Awwww sookie sookie now!
Celisea
May 24th, 2011
4:34 pm
Don’t hurt him Ms. Brown…you know how fiery Altoids are…I almost have to recoup from eating one…LOLOLOL
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:37 pm
Leggs!
I appreciate ur support..
Show me one post where I reeled off
All my communication has been stellar and respectful to whoever I debated
Which one offended u…
SexxyCool was high… We cool now
Which one!?
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
4:37 pm
And don’t let him have a hook…one might choke if one isn’t skillful
Definitely stirring it up
Hook also known as The Gonzo 
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
4:38 pm
Leggs – I think Exiled is into that S & M stuff. The way you’re trying to keep in him in line, he’ll be needing a Safe Word soon
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:38 pm
I wasn’t offended. It’s just your style of typing I suppose. I’m not pissed, just giving you a warning on a style you’re so comfortable with you don’t realize you might be stretching things since you’ve been banned in the past.
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
4:43 pm
Leggs – He will have to adjust or suffer the consequences.
@Sassy – You’ll never look at the Puppets the same again.
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:43 pm
Hook also known as The Gonzo
!!!!!!!!!!!!
SassaFrass blog screaming…then fainting…
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:43 pm
OMG
@safe word…point taken. 
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:45 pm
Well well well..
SExxyCool u k with me sugar?
U too SlimNuGoodie CT?!
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
4:45 pm
Meelow – whatever. The tone of your posts to me was dismissive and arrogant. Oh…wait…that’s just you being you….
Willie Dynamite
May 24th, 2011
4:46 pm
DreamsMat – If you still around bruh you may need to hand out a few peppermints and altoids with EVERY drink served at the blog bar henceforth. Customer Service bruh.
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
4:46 pm
But then to…I’m used to you…so…it’s no biggie.
Exiled!
May 24th, 2011
4:47 pm
Ohh baby,wish we could have make up s3x..
but I’ll let TheDude handle tha massage and the rest of it!
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:48 pm
heeey Mr. Willie…how you doin?
something about that moniker makes me cheeeeeese
SlimNu
May 24th, 2011
4:48 pm
Willie – I’m surprised Swiss isn’t in here with a whole pallet of peppermint candies from Sam’s
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
4:52 pm
I’m surprised Swiss isn’t in here with a whole pallet of peppermint candies from Sam’s
Maybe that’s where he is…hope the Mrs. doesn’t get surprised with some later on..or a pack of cinnamon Altoids…
Leggs
May 24th, 2011
4:57 pm
Seeing the big picture enables you to tolerate the irritations along the way.
PEACE~
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
4:58 pm
Ok so what exactly did me.lo say that’s ban worthy, aside from not having the same opinion as others? I don’t see that he disrespected anyone.
If you still around bruh you may need to hand out a few peppermints and altoids with EVERY drink served at the blog bar henceforth. Customer Service bruh.
WillieD Man I used to do that, but I didn’t like someone else benefitting from my generosity. Call me a hater. lol
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
5:00 pm
Sassy – the Altoid Cinnamon Smalls are best.
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
5:04 pm
DreamsMat – that 428p was kinda out there.
Sassy Me...Stir it Up :-)
May 24th, 2011
5:05 pm
the Altoid Cinnamon Smalls are best.
point taken Sexy…now I gotta go see the candy lady…
SexyCool
May 24th, 2011
5:07 pm
Although, Sassy, I wouldn’t use them for that. The Altoids and peppermint are better for the cooling effect. The cinnamon ones heat your mouth up and seem like they would be an irritant to him.
DreamsMaterialize
May 24th, 2011
5:11 pm
DreamsMat – that 428p was kinda out there.
Sexy People were talking banishment before he said that though. What did he say before that that was particularly offensive. Besides, why would anyone posting be offended by his 4:28p…wasn’t directed toward any of us. Anyway, maybe I should stop too lest Big Brother invent a reason for me to be banned too. lol
Willie Dynamite
May 24th, 2011
5:12 pm
DreamsMat – facilitate dont hate.
Sassy – heyyy to you too. You back on your sabbatical now?
Slim – I’m surprised Swiss missed this and equally surprises Zulu kept up the back/forth. Missing the forest cause of a few trees i tell ya.
The Reanimated Corpse of Swiss (now with titanium-infused bionic w@ng)
May 24th, 2011
7:22 pm
Who…? Wha…? Sorry, I was otherwise occupied… The Mrs. & I were both “working” from home today. What did I miss?
Oh well, fill me in tomorrow — gotta run. I’m out of Altoids.
notmyself
May 24th, 2011
9:54 pm
I find myself in a “relationship” for too long now. I don’t like the person I am with him. we have fun, everything is awesome when it’s good….but he IS a player. I don’t know why I tolerate it…….beyond time to move on!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I appreciate the help I find in the postings here.