I don’t like to meet the children…just the ladies.

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@ Sunshine – I applaude you for your honesty. It is a huge step.

My story…I am currently dating someone I dating 16 years ago. 16 years ago we dated for 2 years. He met my kids at the 6 month mark. He had a huge impact on my then 6 year old and left a lasting impression. At that time, he was childless and it really was a big deal. Fast forward to now. We recently began dating again. He now has a daughter and I have 2 sons. While my now adult son remembers him and has always asked about him throughout the years, my younger son does not know him. My older one has always told him stories about T and told him “that’s the guy mom should have married”. We are taking our time, making sure it is right before I meet his daughter and he meets my younger son. We are making sure we do everything decent and in order because our children are important to us and we don’t want the impression that we have revolving doors in the dating realm.

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HiYas

diva, i think this I doubt waiting longer would have made much of a difference. is very accurate in your friend’s case. simply because the mere presence of lil ones is sooo out of her norm. my best advice on warming up? try to keep the activities and meetups in environments of their choice (at least at first) so they’ll be more apt to enjoy the process of getting to know you.

all three men i dated since my divorce are fathers, and all introduced me to their kid(s) within a month. i waited a bit longer before letting them meet mine, and they were perfectly ok with that.

welcome sunshine!

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I think at least a year. I’m anal when it comes to my girls so the fact that their father and I worked through our issues and married almost a year ago was best for the four of us. However, I did date a guy who was a single father. And because I was single with children and heard so many unpleasant stories of single with no children dating single with children, I only wanted to date someone with children because then there would be a mutual understanding of the life of a single parent. He was a great guy and he too said it was difficult to date single women without children.

I don’t think it’s healthy for children to meet the ‘girlfriends’. Why? For what reason? You’re dating? You haven’t made a committment to the other. You are bound to break up in 6 months. If you’re serious about finding a mate, you have an idea after a year but that still doesn’t mean a year is the right time. People are so quick to breakup over the pettiest of things even after a year. So now little girls and boys are thinking it’s okay to date and sleep with random people. When we should really be teaching our children to seek a mate thus courting a person…really getting to know a person (mind, body, soul). Children are much smarter than they are given credit for.

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@ Mommyof 2 – I think once you are in a committed monogamous relationship you are beyond just “dating” and it should be ok to meet the girlfriend. When I am just dating, there are no titles involved, he is my friend. I think folks often use dating in a rhetorical sense and it is not the same as in an exclusive relationship. I have been dating for years, and dates don’t meet the kids.

@ abc – Totally agree.

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On topic – I don’t have any kids nor am dating a guy with any. However, if I did have some, I wouldn’t put a specific time on when i’d allow the SO to meet them. I would go buy the progression & seriousness of our courtship. I would not want to expose my kids to different fly by night dudes every few months. It just isn’t a good look.

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“She is pretty much the definition of childless.”

How many ways can you define “childless?”
(lol)

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If I were a dude, I don’t think I’d want to be around a chicks kids if my only intention was to get in her panties.

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Morning All!

My fiance’ introduced me to his kids after 3 months. He is a widower and the kids were 4 & 6 when they lost their mother. It had been 2 years since her death when we began dating. I say all this to say, we had to be extra sensitive. If he had wanted to wait a year, I would have been fine with it, whatever he felt best for the kids.

I absolutely love kids. I come from a big family and have 2 nieces and 4 nephews and 2 godchildren. I planned on having about 4 of my own, but things didn’t work out that way. God had another plan for me. I knew some how, some way, I would be a mother and now I will be, officially.

Everyone close to my fiance talks about how a blessing it is that he found someone that loves his kids.

Usually, when a person wants you to meet their kids, they feel some level of trust and respect for you. I consider it an honor. I wouldn’t want to rush it, but if someone NEVER wanted me to meet their kids, that would be a dealbreaker for me. It would crush me because it says you don’t see me in your future.

Wise’s friend that this topic is about sounds like she may not want kids at all. That’s not something that everyone aspires to be, a parent. I wonder if she’s thought about that.

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Morning folks….

I have dated several women that have kids, and I am completely ok with whatever directions the moms chooses to go.There has been occasions when A lady introduces me to herr kids very early on in an effort of full disclosure.( I actually respected her more for being open) and I had dated women that even after several months of dating, refused to allow herr kids to even see me in passing. Either way, one has to repect her choice and take direction from her…..

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Since I don’t have kids, I really can’t say a whole lot about this….other than, I probably don’t like your kids as much as you do.

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We have to also take into account those times when we meet (met – pastense for me) a love potential while our kids were standing right there.

I briefly dated a single father that I met while my youngest son and I were out and about. He had to eventually move away because his daughter’s mother moved to a different state with her new husband.

I met a couple of others where my boys were with me but they soon phased out.

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And…having dated men in the past, some with good co-parenting relationships and those with babymomma drama, my preference became to date men who either didn’t have children.

Because even with the best babymomma situation, there are still added dynamics involving the children and their mother that I learned that I’d just rather not deal with. Building a relationship is difficult enough as it is.

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I probably don’t like your kids as much as you do.

SCool – You know, that statement does bring to mind a pet-peeve of mine that I came across when dating other guys that had kids. They thought the sun didn’t shine until THEIR kids woke up! They would be very indignant about the idea of anyone meeting their kids and would constantly boast about it! In none of these situations did I even ask. I always take the lead from the guy as to how he wants to proceed, after all, they are his kids. While I completely respect your role as their father, I feel this way – unless they are William and Harry, don’t nobody think they are a prince but you!

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Leggs, I think for a person that has never had a child(ren) in any shape or form their entire adult life, there will never be “comfortable” enough time to meet someone they are dating child. Be it 3 weeks, 3 months, or 3 years. I think that is one of those things that you have to just get out there and do it. Meet them (within a reasonable time) and get it over with.

And really it’s all in concern for when and what is best for the child. We has adults can adapt much easier. Or rather we should.

I never not wanted a guy to meet my kids because I was concerned for his feelings. Heck he’s a grown man. It was my boys feelings that I cared about.

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I don’t have kids and after my past relationship I dont think I’ll date another man with children. Now that may have shrunk my dating pool to the size of a pea but heck now that I think about it, isn’t it already that small anyway once you separate the good from the bad lol

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SexyCool, I cannot deny that it was much easier dating with a child whose father was deceased than it was with a son whose father was not.

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Yep…Rock/Leggs…she shot the sht outta him. Wow…I’ma get me a .22!

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Me no feel guuud…it hurts when i swallow

Awww then…Slim Nu you need a hot toddy with tea,lemon n honey and brandy. That’ll make you feel better…or at least sleep for a lil bit.

On topic: This is a sticky situation for me because I’ve dated men with children and it never worked out. This first time it happened, dude was tryna get me to be a mom to his son and I understood b/c he was a single father in the “A” and needed help. Sadly I wasn’t the one b/c I was in school and had my own agenda. Plus I lived downtown within walking distance from school(GSU) and work…he on the other hand stayed in an apartment complex off of Camp Creek that even pizza delivery places didn’t go after dark. He wanted me to move in with him and didn’t understand my reaction. His son resented me b/c he thought I was getting too much of daddy’s attention, and as a result that relationship didn’t work.

Fast forward to my last relationship…different story,same ending. I met his kids within two months of us dating but they were the baddest two boys I’d ever met…they both had/have ADHD and were like he!! on greased wheels. Their mother had the IQ of a rock and it was awful. He needed help,too but it took soooo much away from our relationship. That ended too but I honestly don’t miss him or them bad a$$ kids and they retarded mama.

Now I don’t want to date men with children but some people tell me I’m drastically reducing my choice of dating potential with that mind frame but I feel how I feel….

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SexyCool, when I read her say one year I was like

To go an entire year seeing someone yet living a secret life that does not include your child is just mindboggling.

No my boys were not involved in my relationships but were very much a part of that man and my lives as us being a couple. Once a relationship was agreed upon he got invited to karate competitions and soccer games. He got to hang out at the house on the weekends. He even manned the grill if that is what we were doing. And so much more. He was not trying to be their father but he knew they weren’t going anywhere and to be with me on a relationship level, there would be times he had to be around them. And enjoy it.

Or pretend to. LOL Looking at you angry man.

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Hope you feel better and hope you don’t have strep throat!

Leggs – From what I heard, you can’t get strep if you don’t have any tonsils so I have my fingers crossed on that. My co-workers said her husband has strep now.

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kimmie, I think that’s really nice having the kids a part of the wedding. IMO it lets them know that you are not taking their father from them but becoming part a family with them.

My boys were not a party to my marriage ceremony but they were there in attendance. There were only 7 other people present when I got married. Everyone else was wherever getting ready for the party/reception of the century. LOL

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My husband had two children when I met him….we were kids ourselves(18, 19). I didn’t have any kids then and I did not want any. I was used to kids, I had my niece so much people thought she was my daughter….but when I finally did meet his daughters, I did not have a problem with them or their moms( yes, two babymamas!) It was the Grandmothers! They seemed to think I was standing in the way of him doing the right thing by their daughters. We had the teenage thing for two years and then we broke up…..he still did not marry either of them. When we got back together four years later, the oldest child’s grandmother gave me hell! Did for a long time. Then I did not understand why, but now since I have children myself, I understand fully

I have a single sister that is never without a date if she wants one( I have mentioned her on here before) she let’s her dates meet my teenage nieces…..drives me crazy! it is sooo dangerous and irresponsible. If I was single with kids, I would have to think long and hard about someone meeting my babies….I need to know you first.

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Kimmie, your statement about fear of abandonment bring to mind how my oldest reacted when I moved out from Whitebread. He did not understand and I regretted having put him in that situation. He vaguely remembers his dad because he was barely three when he passed but he was almost 6 when Whitebread and I broke up.

I swore after that that I would never live with a man I am not married to. And I did allow my s/o to sleep at our house. Well there was the one time the hub slept over but he stayed on the couch. But it shed a new bright light into my mind and heart on how kids are affected by things.

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SCool – I agree.

One of my good friends dated a guy whose 10 year old son hated her. He didn’t rush introducing them or anything and his 8 year old loved her. But the son used to say straight nasty things to her and daddy didn’t put a stop to it. When they broke up, it was a weight lifted, not to have to deal with his mean behind again!

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Leggs- And, I truly feel sorry for those children who are being slammed by the “revolving door!”

Me too…..my nieces know a lot of grown azz men because of my sister. Just thinking about it makes me mad!

Another situation that makes me heated mad, is the single person with kids/married person with kids scenario. WTH?! I would never in a million years mix my kids up in some mess like that. But I know some people who have.

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Too soon, Too late. Who knows? Its up to you. Some people are just natural when it comes to kids and some aren’t. Me, I fall into the category of “some aren’t” and I would not have a problem saying that to anybody I dated and believe me I would get it out in the open as soon as I could.

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Morning,

Okay….I’m skimming and I come across this —> That ended too but I honestly don’t miss him or them bad a$$ kids and they retarded mama.

LOLOLOL…OMG way too funny

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On topic – I have a teenager and I’ve been in the mindset of not allowing her to meet Tom, Dick or Harry….not that I’ve done Tom, Dick or Harry but for me and IMO, it’s just not necessary…until and unless I see permenance there. I used to think ut uh no way but I agree, the timeline should be when it’s the right time…2 weeks 3 weeks, a month, whatever works for you and you kid(s). I do think though that if a dude whipped it on me early that he’s packing kids, I don’t see that so much as a deal breaker because his kids are his kids and knowing further into getting acquaintance won’t make them his any less.

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I don’t throw rocks. I wait until they walk they rude asses too close in front of me and trip ‘em.

(I kid. I kid.)

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I have a friend whose daughter got very upset her. She said she could hear her mom & her mom’s boyfriend doing it in the next room when he would come to visit and stay over. Her mom, my friend, said she didn’t think she could really hear it, but knew if he was staying over they were doing it. One night they had a showdown. The daughter went in the bedroom with them when it was time to go to bed and said she wasn’t leaving! She said she knew what they were doing and it made her sick and she was going to sit right there, all night if she had to, to prevent them from doing it. She was yelling and crying and everything!

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@Celisea ~ Although no one is going this route, one must consider when you have teenagers at home. You can’t introduce your children to everyone you date. I have a teenage daughter as well. In my eyes, a very pretty one. I will not bring strange men around her like my mother did with me growing up. I’ve seen a lot and felt hands that I shouldn’t have felt at that age. Thank goodness I had/have the personality to kick them in their ballz, run and tell. Most times she believed me, one time she didn’t care to hear what I had to say. I will not put my daughter in the company of any man I haven’t taken the time to get to know!

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Celisea and just Me I totally agree! Howdy folks!

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Actually, Leggs, I hinted at that earlier.

What happens if, after a year, you (not you specifically) let your man meet your daughter and you immediately sense something off? After a year, you should have some pretty strong emotions built up. What are you going to follow? Your instincts? Or your heart?

I tell ya’…glad I ain’t ever had to deal with this.

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And as much as kids think they know, they know nothing. The can easily get bamboozled by a dude manipulating and getting in their heads. Young cats or old(er) cats.

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My exact sentiments, Celisea (11:44). My exact sentiments!

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And what do you do if you have differing parenting styles? He was raised in Willacootchee where they still beat children like slaves to discipline them, but you are from the time-out school of thought. What if he is from the school of free thought when it comes to raising children – give them opportunities and allow them choices, but you believe in structure and guidance?

How is he going to potentially be the head of your household and you not allow him to discipline them the way he believes is right? When you don’t see eye to eye?

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Leggs – She was 13 at the time.

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@SlimNu ~ sorry for the spoiler news (lol).

@kimmie ~ whew, thought you were going to say 9 or 10 years of age. Even at 13, it’s gross to many teenage girls. She may have thought he was hurting her.

Good for you, kimmie. Good for you. You have to pay attention to all the remarks a potential suitor makes about your child. It speaks of their character as a person or lack thereof.

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kimmie@ 11:59

Good for you! I wish I could get my lunkhead sister to realize that all her dates do not need to meet her teenage daughters.

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“Plus, I don’t think anybody wants to hear their parents doing it!” You’re absolutely right!

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“I don’t think anybody wants to hear their parents doing it”..

At least we know Buddy was putting it down like he was supposed to!!!

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hello ladies. beautiful day out there!

agree with the comments about creepos. at one point as i contemplated my divorce, i resigned myself to be forever alone because i thought it would be too much to ask that a nice guy come into our home and NOT have some creep factor in him. that’s a huge part of why i was so particular about dating.

leggs, i’m sick just reading your story. this is why so many young women need good mentor/role models. not everyone has the confidence you had at an early age to stand up for themselves.

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Celisea what’s with your “Hey PR” gloating? No need to rub the rejection in my face. LOL

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@ Slim – Sore throat…pain to swallow, I was freezing all the time, headache, lethargic. I was MISERABLE! I was in beed all weekend and on Monday…I went home early Tuesday. I am just now starting to feel okay. I took some musinex and the hot toddy, and curled up with my blankie

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I know this little hottie with a newborn, it doesn’t bother me that she just had a baby. I am going to date her anyway and raise that little rascal. I think very soon I may be the first and last guy to be intimate with her since she has had her son. It feels like love this time I hope it works out.

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On topic…I feel for those with daughters…there are some creeps out here. But even still I don’t bring them around my sons either. My sons are just as protective of me as I am of them.

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kimmie – we walked up the street to Busy Bee for dinner last night. It was a little expensive, but we didn’t mind because we were supporting a business in our neighborhood, the service was great and the food was maybe, just maybe, a little better than mine.

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have to protect your kids you don’t want your daughters or sons around pervs. Sugar Ray Leonard as a young boxer got raped by one of his coached. I always wondered how he got the name “Sugar”

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MzNewy, why because I am concerned about her health?

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@czB ~ I was a co*cky child with mouf! I got slapped in it a lot, but it has also helped me out of a few precarious situations!

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I tell you, it’s something when I’m out and about when I see men not sure if they want to look at me or her. She’s beautiful but looks like a “girl” still. I mean she’s crossed the entrance of puberty but she ain’t a full fledge full grown woman, nor does she look like it. She’s getting a really cute shape but she looks every bit of 13 or 14…and she’s 16. How the heck is that appetizing to a grown man? But yeah, my 19 yo niece told me a dude rolled up at the car wash (after school gig) and looked at all the girls there and eyes locked on my kid…I THINK NOT….she said I yelled to him “15 will get you 30.” That’s what I’m talking about…

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Celisea, why must you continue to break my heart, does that bring you joy? lol

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Good one, PR. That was a good one!

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PR – Nothing but love for you dear, nothing but love

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Leggs, refuses to accept that a man can give a woman good sex…..ever. LOL

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I do not, PR. I most definitely do not agree with that. Take that back!

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Own it Leggs, own it! LOL

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Leggs, now we agreed that you would never speak publicly about our tryst!

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Slim, you need something to soothe the back of your throat?

Purp – So you just want me to walk right into that setup huh? I’m under the weather but my brain is still in some form of working order. Thanks tho

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PR’s wang is acting like a metal detector…just waiting on the right beep to set him off. (SlimNu’s brain still works so dodged that “sting”.)

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I forgot about that, PR.

How do you know we’re “under” the weather? Why can’t we be “in” the weather?

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My post says it’s 1:12. I just posted that at 1:15. The blog machine has been showing signs of wear and tear and mental stress for a couple of weeks now.

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Now it says, 1:13 when I actually posted at 1:16.

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Purp – I guess my stingers aren’t feeling too well either. Otherwise, you’d be picking em outta ya azz right about now. lol

Hey, do any of yall talk/walk/move around a lot in your sleep when you’re dreaming? I had the best laugh this morning. The SO must’ve been having a serious dream because he got to moving, twitching and next thing I know he JUMPED up all fast, almost sounded like he fell out of the bed. Even though it startled me, I tried my best not to laugh because I didn’t want to alarm him but more importantly, I wanted to sit back and see what else he was going to do. Anyhoo, this morning I asked him what he was dreaming about and told him what he did. I just couldn’t hold it in. I was like, were you base jumping in your sleep because I almost thought you were going to take off running for a second. Oh man, I was literally in tears laughing. He said someone was trying to drag him by his legs so he was attempting to break free.

Back to your regularly scheduled program

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SCool – They have probably upped the prices over the years, since they are still so popular. But cool, you had a good experience! And “walking” would be my excuse to go often! I’d say “we can go eat that good food and “walk” it off!LOL!! Sounds like you are living the life though! I always dreamed of living in a cool neighborhood where I could walk to a pub or eatery. I have a good friend that used to live in Midtown, in a brownstone apt. We used to sit on the brick stairs in the front and drink wine and talk, holler at the neighbors. Or we could walk to several cool spots. It was fun.

Celesia – It still turns my stomach when I think about how he was looking at my baby!

Leggs – I said yesterday, an empty wagon makes the most noise!!!LOL!!!

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Yep. Totally loving the location. Weekend before last, we walked over to the MARTA station, hopped on the train and walked down to the Sweet Auburn festival. We shared food from several booths, ended up at the Coors tent, where they were serving free food and free drinks.

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SCool – Was it a layer cake or a pound cake? If it was a layer key lime, I got a good recipe I can get you.

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I meant “super slim slices”

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Hey everyone.

I’ve not introduced my daughter to anyone. Sometimes I think I never will, but I think there has to be a balance. If she never sees me interacting with a woman, being affectionate with her, treating her with respect, then it leaves her to get her ideas of male/female interaction from somewhere else, which is out of the question. There is some benefit to a child seeing healthy male/female adult interactions.

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for soul food

SexyCool, my cousin gets offended the phrase soul food. She said it’s home cooking which anybody can do if the learned to. It’s not a black thing. LOL

But I don’t pay her any mind. She is on that 2520 being from France and living in North stuff. LOL

And no she cain’t cook no soul food nor home cooking.

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LOL – folks aways gettin’ offended about something. And that she cain’t cook….just wow…laughing….

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Interesting take on soul food. I always took Southern Cooking as soul food.

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There is some benefit to a child seeing healthy male/female adult interactions.

Dreams – I agree.

They were talking about this very subject, introducing the kids, on Steve Harvey and on Frank & Wanda one morning about a year ago. Steve was along the lines of most of us – introducing once things look to be pretty stable and not a revolving door. Getting to see how you all interact together, yada yada.

Frank came off on this whole other tip, and one I’ve come across before actually. He said not to introduce the kids at all until you decide get engaged! He was like, why do you need to meet my kids? You’re in a relationship with me, not my kids.

I had a guy tell me that once. Obviously we did not get engaged, but I did end up meeting his daughter. But by that point, it was pretty much over and I really didn’t care one way or the other.

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LOL SexyCool, exactly.

She eats porridge and we eat oatmeal. LOL

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@ Raqi – Great movie. Yes well worth watching.

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Raqi, it is a good movie and not what you expect right when you think you have things figured out.

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After the world wide earthquake Saturday there wont be anybody around to meet the kids? Some people believe this is going to happen, folks are making a run on water survival gear. WTH guess I better not say that I might be there Saturday……LOL

After Noon Everyone:

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Have any of you all seen it?
Raqi I saw it. In the end the she…took her children Katherine and Christopher Schwarzenegger out for lunch yesterday in Brentwood, Calif. amid revelations of Arnold Schwarzenegger‘s love child scandal. Haha hope you didn’t think I would be tacky enough to tell you end. lol

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Leggs and Celisea, catching up on you all’s discussion, while at lunch I was talking to Mari about the blog topic and she was telling me about her sister quit it with a guy because she felt that he was being too friendly with her son. She said when her sister questioned him about it and he said he was just trying to befriend the boy. Whatever he was doing did not set to well with her. She got him out their lives.

You just have to be careful these days.

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DreamsMat, I had type a comment to you but the blogmaster said I am commenting too quickly. LOL Like a whole 4 minutes since my last comment. I don’t want to type it again.

I think the problem with the time stamps trying to place the comments at times before they are actually being posted is causing the “too quickly” errors. It probably tried to put in the same time slot that I had already made a comment.

My clock now says 2:31. Let’s see what time the wizard of blog say I posted it.

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Also, the atheist arent worried .
Purp One atheist group started a business (Eternal Earth-bound Pets) to care for “believer’s” pets after the second coming since pets supposedly will not be allowed in heaven. They were charging $100 per pet, but raised it to $135 after this prediction became public. lol

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SlimNu?
1.27pm

Are u totally sure ur guy ain’t a felon in some state and on the low low….while that play may have well been an innocent but scar dream,it can also be due to his guilty conscience playing tricks with him!

Dont let his good pudy beating fog ur brain.

Otherwise,just Google him for ur own good! (not laughing/joking that much)

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I thought Salt was pretty good…have any of you seen INSIDIOUS yet? I thoroughly enjoyed that flick. I rented My Soul To Keep but haven’t watched it. I hope it’s at least decent

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…2:36

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Because time won’t give me time….. And time makes lovers feel Like they’ve got something real But you and me we know They’ve got nooooooooooooooooooooooothing but time And time won’t give me tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime

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Everything doesn’t always come back to sexing…..

SlimNu!

That’s where u wrong….

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Purp – That movie is the one that came out not too long ago, sort of a scary flick where the parents of a little boy think he’s in a coma and that their house is haunted but in actuality the boy is haunted. It had me jumping in my seat with hands over eyes and all at the movies.

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I have a grown son and currently involved with a woman with 2 teenagers (16/18). I would say wait as I wish I’d waiting to meet the kids. I met the kids after about 2 months. I would have preferred to NOT meet them as the relationship she has with them is unhealthy and along the lines of co-dependency! Of course, had I waited, I would not be able to see the co-dependency! It did unfold kind of naturally though because we didn’t want to spend ALL of our time together “in the streets” as there is nothing like “just chillin at home watching a movie”. I can’t wait until they grow up and move out.

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Raqi – I never even thought about that. Knowing me, I’d just ask who the chick was. I’ve heard him say all kinds of things in his sleep, laughing even but never another person’s name. However, I will keep those ideas in mind…. Insert evil laugh & hands rubbing together, here lol

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Raqi – Re convo w/Mari…that’s a dang shame. I believe it though. You have to be as careful, if not more with boys than girls nowadays.

I remember seeing an episode on Oprah about a proball player (football) and I tell I cried that day. I can’t remember his name but he was telling his story on how his mom, being a single mom and struggling had a boyfriend that molested him EVERY chance he got. The mom thought he was there as a positive role model and would leave him with her boyfriend. That story turned my stomach. He said the boyfriend told him it was his job to keep him erect…he said that went on for years. He cried throughout the interview but said he was not broken by it. I getting misty thinkin about it.

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Apparently I talk in my sleep too. Glad I don’t have secrets from the hubs AND that’s a deterrent from obtaining any.

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You really have to protect your children, all children really!

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I used to sleepwalk when I was younger. Still talk a little. My boo talks in his sleep too. Most times I really can’t understand what he is saying.

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Why do people take people back after the cheating physically and they know for certain that it did happen.

Purple – You know we’ve discussed that on here before. It seems that most men won’t take a woman back, but a lot expect the woman to forgive and take them back.

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SexyC – She is sooo distraught. We work for the same company but in different states. She called me to help her Dick Tracey some stuff that she found and I rolled right up on it…and sure enough it’s been the girlfriend that’s been the thorn in her flesh since her son…now 12

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Dreams – It never stops, even when you think it does. They’ve just found a way to hide it better.

Exactly….she’s trying not to breakdown on the phone but I can hear it. He ain’t even all that…IMO

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Why do people take people back after the cheating physically and they know for certain that it did happen

I took him because I loved him. Because I did not want it to look like I failed.

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What do tigers dreams of? When they take a little tiger snooze? Do they dream of mauling zebras

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Lovely Brown – She sounds broken…but she’s saying she’s used to it now. You know me, I went right into asking if she’s decided to stay. At one time she had a guy trying to get down on the side and she passed…nothing happened but her husband found out of the potential pursuit he went ballistic….followed here around for months, followed to church, tryna figure out if it was someone on the deacon board or at church period. Checked behind her in EVERYTHING. All that because IMO it mirrored his own indiscretions and the thought of someone doing to her (on him) what he was doing to others (on her)….just a piece of trash.

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Purp – I don’t put much stock in what someone says in their sleep either. It’s not like we can really control what we dream about or even remember what the dream was once we wake up. My dog i used to have would move her little legs like she was running, in her sleep. Now THAT was funny to watch.

I don’t have too many sexual dreams but I’ll never forget that one time I woke up twitching in my sleep from dreaming i had just bust one. It was Sooooo real

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I don’t really know what I would do if my husband cheated on me. I have different thoughts stemming from my heart, soul and mind separately as to what I think I may do, but I really don’t know for sure. It’s a hard call.

Part of me believe that everyone is capable of sincerely coming back from a wrong doing. Just think about all things you yourself have done and now made good on. But then another part of me believe that once you have opened that door you will walk back thru again given the chance.

One of my friend’s husband stepped out after they had been married 5 years. The got back together after a year of being separated and I honestly believe he has never done it again. It would be unfair to think or say otherwise with him having matured and found a better way.

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IF you were cheated on and took that person back could you really in your heart of hearts forgive them fully and not think about it anymore?

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@SlimNu ~ nice to come back from a 2.5 hr mtg and read about your SO’s dream. I would have laughed too. I understand the leg thing. I sometimes pop up in my sleep wondering WTH am I?

Also, I thought Salt was a damn good movie.

@Raqi v ~ there’s a male parent that many of the girls at school flock to whenever he’s around. Including mine. They all call him Uncle ______. You know parent day or parents meeting in the gym for a broad annoucement, stuff like that. It is so unnerving. I had to tell him that my child will not be calling him Uncle anything and that I was uncomfortable. He smiled and said that I had nothing to worry about because he was “harmless.” I said the fact that you told me that tells me differently. I’ve been watching him ever since. And my child addresses him by his name (at least in front of me she does). You’re right, you have to be careful. What damn parent has kids at a school calling him Uncle?????

Let me go back and see what else you guys are talking about!!!!

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(I can’t do that mess if not held to vows)

Exactly. That makes all the difference in the world. And yes, there is no fool like a silly old fool.

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If you value and respect your mate you will not cheat. If you do cheat you don’t value or repsect your mate…no excuses. Now why would you want to be with someone who does not value nor respect you.

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Celisea, I just remembered something I said once to my hub. I was angry with him and he knew I was but he was making light of it. He asked me “so what you going to do divorce me?”. Out of anger and get back I told him he isn’t rich enough yet for me to divorce, being that it was a money issue at hand.

I got a nice little spanking for saying that. LOL I just love those little spats that end every so lovely.

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Leggs, all those pedophiles say they are harmless.

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I’m sure we wouldn’t have noticed you were gone if you hadn’t made that announcement.

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If I had to do it all over again, I would have kicked his Richard Johnson in and told him to kick rocks.

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Lovely Brown, thank you for your honesty. I remember in college I cheated on a girl she took me back. I knew I could get away with it again and again and I did until I got tired of her. I grew up eventually.

Sexy Cool, lesson learned!

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IF you were cheated on and took that person back could you really in your heart of hearts forgive them fully and not think about it anymore?

I have been there, done that and most definitely DIDN’T forget about it. Every time he was out of sight, whether it be out with friends or in the bathroom with the cell phone, my mind would never rest from pondering if he was up to some shenanigan of sorts. I was beginning to live a life of merely trying stay one step ahead of him on any trifling behavior before he got over on me. I didn’t like living that way…
So when I got into my current situation w/the Beau, i had to have a talk with myself on refraining from being that way again. I have all access to his spot and I want to respect that he’s allowed me that privilege. He lives his laptop open and unlocked and sometimes his fb page open and I leave it where it is. Once you start looking, it starts to consume you.

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@SexyC ~ he wouldn’t have been able to kick rocks until some later after kicking his richard johnson in! His reflexes wouldn’t be working. No way he could kick rocks (lol).

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I know u don’t know but do u think Hilary and Bill are still married?
They hold hands in public wldnt that be so hard if they faked it?

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DemeNik81 – yeah…well….all of your wonderful contributions are certainly appreciated.

There is a little red X in the top corner of your screen. There is a little white arrow floating on your screen as well. Take your mouse and move the little white arrow over the little red X and right click. I’m sure your issue with this blog will be immediately resolved.

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They’ve been “bred” to do that, Exiled!

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LOL – Purp.

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Sexy Cool, clothes…shoes….

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U being stingy with ur views PR/Leggs

Do u think,assuming they’re still married,that Bill has stopped? He travels with Terry Mculafe etc and without Hilary and ummm,yeah Bill knows how to have a good time!
Maybe Hilary is getting hers on the side as well with a young stud,who knows…she’s a sharp lawyer

that would be some consolation then…and the two of them agree never to f!??;ck again after that Lewislutskey debacle!

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@Slim Nu…I have been around “these ATL parts” for a while. A little background on me: Own three businesses, and write two nationwide social blogs of my own. This is purely entertainment for me. Once or twice a week I see the topics while I am reading the paper online. If it looks interesting I stop in. Pages 1-3 are usually on topic. I then skim the last page to see if I want to post anything just for laughs. But of course the topic has changed so drastically that I am totally thrown off. Wise Diva you could be on to something great and very lucrative if you expand your audience. Take it from me I have already done it.

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We are so honored that you have graced us with your presence.

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Now now now, SexyC. You think that was a proper hello (LOLOLOL).

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@Exiled ~ your posts are so riddled with sex, I can no longer determine what’s a joke and what isn’t a joke.

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Leggs – it just irks me when folks come in all derisive regarding what goes on in/at MIA. This is a *online community.* It is more than a single-topic blog. We don’t just comment on the topic. We actually have a conversation.

And while Deme’s accomplishments seem rather impressive to him/her, I’m usually less than impressed by one who has to toot their own horn’s in order to seem better than. In my opinion, it actually makes that individual less than.

And for the record, I don’t recall anyone asking for a curriculum vitae.

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Deme – I was asking because basically, not every topic is something that can be discussed for a whole 8hrs without beating it to death and everyone here. Many of us have been bloggers for the last 6/7 years and even with the regularity, we do not prevent any new folks from joining us. Maybe you’re taking this a bit too seriously??? MISadventures in Atlanta…so Cheating is pretty much in line with the original point of the blog. But what do I know.

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@SexyC ~ I had to chuckle at the curriculum vitae.

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DemiNik81 – If cheating ain’t a part of dating I don’t know what is…lol We can’t talk about hot heavy sex EVERYDAY.

Been There Done That – You’ve been lurking long enough to know the norm is veering off topic. Fashion, tv, celebrities, cooking, sexing, scripture…everything. Seriously though the topic ventures away because frankly we just can’t talk about dating everyday all day. The flow tends to go somewhere in real life.

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SCool – Please. If “Dem” was really “all that” she wouldn’t have time for this little blog, what with 3 business to run and all! And says few take it serious? Well then it’s serving it’s purpose, even to her, since it’s ENTERTAINMENT!

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When do you fly out?

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SC when I heard that tape, I interpreted it as ” I did the best I could do, I shot his azz nine times and I’ll do better the next time”.

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LMAO – exactly.

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The empty wagon makes the most noise. Why because these is nothing in it. Dem we hear you loud and clear. What does owning 3 forms of business haev to do with blogging? You are yourself are out off topic so thank you for joining us in our off topic”ness”. Silly rabbit!

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SCool – In 2 weeks, Friday the 3rd!

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Dang, now PR’s calling people farm animal names (rather backyard animal names).

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Leggs, it’s obvious that person is here to promote her own blog and to try and get us to view it to maybe get “hits” up on her on site

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Why am I thinking 60,000 minimum

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That’s not nice, cba, but it did make me laugh!!

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Leggs – I started to throw out the fact that we have had blog meet n greets in the past to Deme, but frankly I just didn’t give a dayum lol Plus i’m trying to figure out if that person’s blog is so great, why are they snooping around these parts?

Fishing for topics?
Recruiting bloggers?

Surely it cannot be for the sake of calling us out for not killing, then bringing back to life, then killing again a topic that was discussed in the first 3 pages. Some topics have gone on well after hours (i.e bootlegged blogging) and some topics are done before it even gets started. This is a case of when Taking things too seriously goes wrong. lol

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Baa daa bing…SlimNu has closed the doors on Deme!

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A friend told me earlier today that Maria’s baby and the other woman’s baby was born only five days apart.

I read that today,too. He’s been supporting them all this time b/c 1.It’s his child and he’s supposed to and 2.Naturally he’d hoped it would stay a secret….NOT. Also read a story about “the hunt” for a photo of the child…what’s worse is that there could be a six figure payday for the person that gets the photo.

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OK folks..let me take it from here…

DemeNik81, instead of handling the blog fam kinda rough( or trying to anyway) come on over here and let me talk to you for a minute… I got this BAB t-stirt I wanna show you……

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@Deme ~ just so you know going forward, the lonely girlfriends club fell on deaf ears. That remark didn’t bother anyone. What’s bothersome is you coming on complaining about a blog that you yourself is on…that’s all.

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What’s bothersome is you coming on complaining about a blog that you yourself is on…that’s all.

ouch…nuff said….

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Googled 10 most overlooked men and women and Diva’s blog was the third item that came up. It was the post from April 26. Before that was something about the 10 mysteries and something about directors. I tried to find Deme’s spot but it didn’t come up. And I was honestly trying to check him/her out.

oh well to that….

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Sassy, that same friend told me to type images and then I typed Arnold S and bam!! I saw the photo of the child.

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One that comes to mind was about the ten most overlooked men and women
Didn’t one of Wise’s topics reference an Essence article about this?

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“Call me crazy but turning an online community into a real life network isn’t such a bad idea.”

Yeah…Wise was my roommate for more than six months nearly six years ago. I’d say that we’ve pretty much caught on to that great idea.

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I have dated dads in the past and I loved it. You get to see a whole new side of a guy. On the other hand, I worked in childcare and often babysat, so being around children was never a problem for me. There is no real formula for when to introduce the kids to new “friend” consider the child(ren) and the new significant other. Good luck and always discuss before surprise meetings.

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