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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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Dating: Good cooks date more

I understand that the way to a man’s heart is through his home-cook starved stomach, but I had no idea that women who cook for men get more dates.  Apparently it’s true.  My friend cooked for a great guy she was interested in and the next thing you know she is getting all kinds of attention!

Everyone loves a great meal and there is nothing sexier than a man in the kitchen…cooking.   The thing about men cooking….a lot of them choose not to cook for women they are casually dating.  When a man makes a meal, he must really like you a lot.

Actually, the same can be said for me because I only feel compelled to whip up something for a man after he has been around for a while. I won’t cook for any random dude who has shown half the effort towards getting to know me.

When do you think cooking meals for your date is appropriate?  Guys, what do you think of women who offer to cook for you?

Ladies, has a man ever cooked you a special dinner with no expectations of having you as dessert? Why is it hard to get a nice meal cooked by a man with no strings attached?

When was the last time you cooked a great meal to impress someone?

What is the best meal you have made that made your date go crazy? Let’s hear about those sexy and romantic dinners that turned out to impress someone special. I may or may not be taking notes for a dinner with someone this weekend. Share the joys of dating and cooking, people!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

309 comments Add your comment

ASB

May 5th, 2011
6:41 am

Cooking for men will get you dates but not necessarily a committed relationship. I know many women who are married and can’t boil water.

Dudogger

May 5th, 2011
7:51 am

This all sounds quite silly and trivial.

Simple Man.....

May 5th, 2011
8:26 am

Morning Peeps…

Cooking for a woman is a great way escalate the involvment…Notice I did not say the relationship….The problem is that when I invest the kind of time and effort required to produce such an evening I have expectations that mirror those efforts.

Lovely Brown

May 5th, 2011
8:52 am

I really don’t think it matters. My sister is single and can’t cook a lick, but she is never without a date. I could cook a little bit before I got married, I got much better with time. And like ASB said, I too know a lot married women that can’t cook. What bothers me is when a person can cook but won’t…..there is a lot to be said for effort. Someone may just appreciate you trying.

TenderRoni

May 5th, 2011
9:18 am

Is this the same friend that showed up to a guys house after the third date offering to cook…laughing-out-loud!

kellibean

May 5th, 2011
9:32 am

I’m not a cook at all…somehow, I’ve always found men who cook really well. My current s/o cooks dinner, bakes dessert, and cleans the dishes!!! It’s so nice!!! I find it super s*xy to see him in the kitchen.

MC Hammock

May 5th, 2011
9:38 am

I am THE cook at my house. My wife rarely…and I mean RARELY cooks. When she does cook, she can make a mean lasagna, but I am the grill master and do the breakfast cooking and practically all of the supper time meals. I don’t think she thinks it makes me sexy, it just means she doesn’t have to stop by Arby’s on the way home. But when I cook, I make good meals that include chicken, fish and other healthy stuff. I actually like to do it, so I’m not complaining.

Problem is….I usually have to do the clean-up as well….*sigh

MC Hammock

May 5th, 2011
9:39 am

Now if only I could get her to wear that French Maid outfit when we eat….

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
9:47 am

Good Morning.

MzNewy

May 5th, 2011
9:53 am

Good morning All.

LOL @ Tenderoni….yep…

To cook or not to cook…that depends on the guy.

TenderRoni

May 5th, 2011
9:56 am

I cook, I enjoy cooking.
A man that can cook is sexy to me!
I don’t put a time frame on when to cook for a man. Depends on the comfort level we are at.
I dated one guy, and offered to cook him something and he was like no that’s what a wife does. I was like um ok its not that serious.
My last guy, he really liked to cook, so by our like fourth date we were cooking together, which was great.

Purple Rain

May 5th, 2011
9:57 am

I have never cooked for a woman with the expectation of something in return for the meal. I just love to cook.

kimmie

May 5th, 2011
9:59 am

Morning Gang!

You regulars know I am a foodie. I love to cook and bake. With that being said, I cook for those I care for and love, and occasionally I do it for profit. And occasionally for my coworkers if we’re having something in the office. Which means a random dude won’t fit in any of those catagories. When we’ve been seeing each other awhile and I am comfortable having him over to my house, then he gets to taste my cooking, but not before.

As for it attracting men, I can’t say that it has. Plenty have eaten my food and still choose not to take things to the next level with me. Gone right on and married someone that can’t boil water. All the conventional stuff they claim attracts men, like good cooking, getting along with his mama – none of that has worked for me. They say watch how a guy treats his mother, if he treats her well that’s how he’ll treat you. Not true in my case. None treated me bad, it just didn’t have any bearing on how he treated me. Plus, I don’t know any men that mistreat their mothers. But if they were going to act the fool with me, mama wasn’t stopping them.

Nope, dudes don’t care about you being able to cook or not, at least in my world!

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
10:05 am

I can relate to most of your post, kimmie. I too love to cook, but it has never helped me get a date. I don’t mind cooking for a man after we’ve gotten to know each other. A man hasn’t cooked for me, but if one does, I hope it’s not because he expects me to be his dessert. It may happen, but don’t do it for that sole reason.

SlimNumeroUno

May 5th, 2011
10:14 am

I have cooked a few times for the Beau and he’s thrown some stuff on the grill before. I came home…or to his house rather to find him trying to make some jerk chicken. lol It was shole smelling good but I had already eaten and didn’t have a desire to taste it at the time.

When my ex and I were together, I cooked often. I think I’ve gotten out practice a bit since I haven’t really had a need to cook as often anymore. I would love to learn how to cook some New stuff. Believe it or not, the palate gets bored too.

Purple Rain

May 5th, 2011
10:14 am

I find that hard to believe that a cooked meal is an invitation for a first time romp. What kind of person is that?

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:15 am

Morning all -

The thing about men cooking….a lot of them choose not to cook for women they are casually dating. When a man makes a meal, he must really like you a lot.

This is how I feel about it as well. I’m really cool on giving girlfriend/wife benefits to someone who is not my boyfriend or husband.

I realize that there are plenty of females who are more than happy to, tho…so *shrug* :lol:

M. (pronouced M dot)

May 5th, 2011
10:17 am

Good day..

“Guys, what do you think of women who offer to cook for you?”

When a woman I just met offers to cook for me, I am flattered but I will usually decline. Its been my rule for a while. It takes me a while to warm up to someone who is trying to cook for me. The funny thing is most people really aren’t great cooks. Therefore, to save me from making the face of (its to much salt in this food!), I would rather us go out, nothing crazy expensive and then work our way up to the home cooked meals. Also, everyone’s sanitary levels arent the same so lets start slow. No harm no foul.

kimmie

May 5th, 2011
10:20 am

Purple – That’s not uncommon, actually. Plenty expect something in return if they take you out for a meal. They really think they are doing something if they actually cook for you!

Purple Rain

May 5th, 2011
10:21 am

It really doesn’t impress me if a woman cooks for me, unless we are already serious. I would have to know here really well before I ate some of her food.

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
10:21 am

@ARed ~ did you mean to say you’re really NOT cool????

Purple Rain

May 5th, 2011
10:22 am

kimmie, that is crazy! For me to cook for a woman that I am interested in means she has been through a screening process and we are beyond initial “getting to know each other things” so her first meal cooked by me for her would probably be breakfast…..if she were any good the night before….if not she would get a piece of fruit and some coffee in a styrofoam cup out of the door. LOL

SlimNumeroUno

May 5th, 2011
10:24 am

A guy cooked for me before and I think he was REALLY hoping on some action for dessert. I have to admit though, that was the best fish I had tasted in a while….not THAT good to give up any puddy tho lol

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
10:25 am

LOLOLOL…he cooked you fish and wanted to taste your fish! I know, I know, I’m warped!

DJ Sniper

May 5th, 2011
10:28 am

I can’t even lie; when I was single, a woman who could cook got extra points over women who couldn’t. Now, this isn’t to say that I have a problem getting in the kitchen and cooking because I don’t. Still, I preferred women who could. Now, a woman who can’t cook but was willing to learn wasn’t a huge issue, but women who can’t and don’t have any desire to learn, I couldn’t deal with.

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:28 am

Ladies, has a man ever cooked you a special dinner with no expectations of having you as dessert?

Well, I do have a friend who throws dinner parties for those of us who don’t have families in the city. It’s nice to know you have somewhere to go on holidays and get a good home cooked meal.

Other than that, the guy has either been dating me or wanted to date me. One brotha came over, was in the kitchen deboning and skinning whole chickens, making polenta and brocolli rabe – stuff I’d never heard of. I thought there were no strings, til a condom fell out of his pocket. :shock:

He was shown the door after dinner. :lol:

M. (pronouced M dot)

May 5th, 2011
10:29 am

Questions everybody,

Ladies, how do you handle a guy that always cooks but never takes you out? Do you view him as maybe cheap or that he thinks you arent worth spedning money on?

Guys, how do you handle a woman who never cooks but can? Do you look at her as lazy or do you think she thinks you arent worth her cooking for?

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 5th, 2011
10:30 am

Love it, in fact; it’s a deal breaker in my book.

Everybody know I’m cheap, and if you buy groceries and don’t cook ‘em, then you’re wasting money. Better than that, you’re wasting money by eating out (and not the healthiest option either).

Long story short, burning in the kitchen is a requirement. Not just for the reasons I’ve just stated, but it’s also a sign of self-sufficiency to me. And self-sufficiency is sexy as heyall.

kimmie

May 5th, 2011
10:32 am

Purp – You are crazy! :lol:

But you & I, being foodies and all, we’re on a different level. For us, food is kind of how you show love.

My friends & family love to get an invite because they know I’m going to always fix something good. Even if SO grills, which he does very well, and buys some sides,I’m always going to whip up my special lemonade or tea and maybe a salad and a dessert.

DJ Sniper

May 5th, 2011
10:33 am

M Dot, I’m lucky that I never dealt with a woman who knew how to cook but didn’t want to. Out of all of the actual relationships that I’ve been in, the women never had a problem cooking.

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
10:35 am

Ladies, how do you handle a guy that always cooks but never takes you out? Do you view him as maybe cheap or that he thinks you arent worth spedning money on?

No, I wouldn’t view him as cheap and think I’m not worth spending money on. Heck, he bought the groceries didn’t he. Not only that, depending on the skills he has in the kitchen, I may be feasting on a delicious meal just as I would at a nice restaurant.

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:35 am

Ladies, how do you handle a guy that always cooks but never takes you out?

This doesn’t happen to me. :lol:

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
10:39 am

@ARed ~ did you see my 10:21?

Raqi V

May 5th, 2011
10:40 am

Cooking never got me more dates simply because I didn’t cook for random men. Only after we were in a relationship did I cook for a man and/or allow him to join me and my boys for a meal.

I actually had several men make statements alluding to me cooking for them which I either ignored, acted as if I didn’t get it or I straight out said “I don’t think so”.

Some guys use it as a tactic for them to get out of taking you out and them having to pay for a date.

If I just met you, no you are not offered the convenience and privilege of coming to my house, me cooking for you while we watch a movie on my television. Nope. I had to know you and like you before we went there. I would rather treat YOU to dinner out at an upscale restaurant than have you breaking bread in my personal space.

My hub did cook for me however before I ever invited him to dinner as my love interest. The few times that he did eat anything prepared by my hands at my table before he and I were in a relationship was merely as a longtime friend.

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:40 am

I could cook a little bit before I got married, I got much better with time

My mother recommends this. She’s an excellent cook, but wasn’t when she got married. And since she’s still married, she spent 25+ years cooking for her family. Her advice “when you get married, you’ll learn to cook, trust me.”

Folks kill me with wanting “ready made wives.” There is something to be said about growing into things. And laughing at the memories the year she over cooked the Thanksgiving turkey.

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:41 am

@ARed ~ did you see my 10:21?

Leggs, catch up on your slang. “I’m cool” on something means I’m not good on something.

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:43 am

Another gem from my mother: “If you can read, you can cook.”

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
10:44 am

Well, la de da! Never heard that slang!

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:47 am

I actually had several men make statements alluding to me cooking for them which I either ignored, acted as if I didn’t get it or I straight out said “I don’t think so”.

Right. :lol:

Leggs

May 5th, 2011
10:48 am

I’m cool, my bad…both dumb!

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 5th, 2011
10:48 am

@MDot

A woman that can cook but chooses not to cook for me?

Sheeiiitttt.

I’d take that to mean that she didn’t want to, or she didn’t want to cook for the D, as if I wasn’t worth the effort or time. Then again, I let it be known that we’re both auditioning for the role of mate so;

if she didn’t wanna cook, buleeve there was always one that would a phone call away.

SexyCool

May 5th, 2011
10:49 am

I don’t cook because I love to. I cook because we need to eat. The bonus is that I’m a decent enough cook.

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:49 am

I’m cool, my bad…both dumb!

*shrugs* :arrow:

Simple Man.....

May 5th, 2011
10:50 am

Dan, Did you just go third person on us????

AmazonRed™

May 5th, 2011
10:52 am

Simple Man…where have you been? That’s his “thing” I guess. :? :lol:

M. (pronouced M dot)

May 5th, 2011
10:53 am

@Dan

LOL that is funny…I dated a girl and I never pressured her to cook but I knew she was always tired (code word for LAZY).

Turns out when she did cook, it wasn’t that great anyway so I was better off lol

Simple Man.....

May 5th, 2011
10:55 am

morning Ared….See, this is what happens when I allow this damn job to get in the way of Blogging…

M. (pronouced M dot)

May 5th, 2011
10:56 am

Question for the married folks, how do you handle it when someone doesn’t want to cook? My sister in law will not cook…even on holidays..everyone is pitching in, bringing sides, etc but she is not really doing too much…just chilling like she is a guest lol…

SexyCool

May 5th, 2011
10:58 am

Shout-out to all the MintHeads in the building….

My mind is Mint Condition. (Will be listening to them all day on GrooveShark.)

One of my besties just bought floor seats in the R. Kelly pre-sale. I’m thinking I’m going to pass on Are-Uh…

Dan - Simply....Superior

May 5th, 2011
10:58 am

@Simple – you’ve been on here how long?