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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Are dating games effective?

Playing hard to get.  Acting aloof.  Juggling multiple romantic partners.  It’s all considered part of the dating game. Does it ever get hard to determine what is part of the game and what isn’t? After all the strategies are deployed, are we getting what we really want out of the dating game?  Are all these dating games really working?

Do you think dating games are wrong or necessary?

Have you ever met someone who has absolutely no game at all?  Did you welcome the change in pace or question what the real game was behind the “no game” claims?

Happy Friday!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

118 comments Add your comment

ASB

April 8th, 2011
6:05 am

I don’t play games in relationships. However, I think most people play games. I wish people would be honest about what they want.

Jason

April 8th, 2011
7:19 am

Right or wrong, most head games are based on psychology. They work, at least for a while. Eventually the other person wises up… well, not everyone but the few who don’t either get dumped for being dumb or end up miserably taken advantage of.

Probably everyone plays games, even if they’re not aware of it. But not everyone does it to the same degree and some try to keep it to a minimum. Too bad they end up losing out quite a bit to those who not only play the game but have mastered it.

CoolShadow

April 8th, 2011
8:22 am

I think everybody has a strategy; some play games while others are straight shooters and non-hagglers. Some game players do it to gauge interest or to manipulate but that behavior will turn off straight shooters. I think the most interesting aspect of this topic is to get people (especially women) to realize that they might have to re-evaluate or change their strategy or game when it isn’t working to their satisfaction.

Matt

April 8th, 2011
8:25 am

Playing games may not be exactly great, but in modern day society it is a neccesity, take my word for it I hate games probably more than everyone, I am not a “player” at all. The fact is that the most exciting time for a new couple is the chase, plain and simple, if you take away the chase or if one person stops trying to impress the other all together, then you will have a serious problem later in the relationship, couples need to be able to look back and remember that excitement after all the games are over with and look back with fond memories of the passion they felt when they first met, all the things they didn’t know about the other, etc. etc. So yes game are needed, however people who take them too far as having multiple partners, lying, so on and so forth will have nothing to fall back on later, considering they played the games wrong in my mind, those people unfortunately will ultimately be unhappier and have a less fortunate relationship with their significant other.

Dan - Simply....Superior

April 8th, 2011
8:33 am

Mayne,

Did I play games. Twas fun. It was interesting to see the mental gymnastics a woman went through wanting to believe me. The twisted logic that I would weave was beautiful. – Good times, man, good times.

At some point though, it got too easy. Like a major league talent play double -A ball, I got bored. Even the big fish held no lure. So I change strategy. Stopped “playing” and started telling the truth and letting the women decide.

And that was more fun. Watching a new set of mental gymnastics as [she] tried to reconcile [her] desire from what she felt I, or others, might think of [her].

Yeah, games have their place. But regardless of the honesty of either party, the games most often get played in our own heads.

Luvah

April 8th, 2011
8:50 am

It’s AKLL a game, in case you haven’t figured out. It’s exciting, stimulating, frustrating, crushing, tingling and challeging all rolled up into one. I’ll take that any day over the dull “what youm see is what you get” crowd. Give me something to imagine, to fantasize about, to figure out. I am so tired of the men and women that just resign to the “This is the package. Waddaya think?” and leave it at that. Put some hot sauce on it and live a little. You’ll never travel to exciting new lands until you first have the courage to lose sight of the shoreline.

Luvah

April 8th, 2011
8:51 am

Sorry…early morning typing. “It’s ALL a game…..”

knockoutblonde

April 8th, 2011
8:56 am

The games are a part of the dating cycle, just like it’s a part of everything else. Whether it’s work, socially or even financially, whomever plays the “Game” the best, wins. Those that don’t like the game are really nothing but wall flowers to me. No one will remember them ten minutes after they leave the room. I agree with Luvah, embrace the game, play the game, learn how to play it better from your mistakes. It really is a fun, exciting world out there, if you let it be. Monotony, predictability and routine is like a bucket of water pouring on a campfire. And speaking of….it’s FRIDAY. Let the games begin!!!

George P Burdell

April 8th, 2011
9:03 am

In my opinion, these are silly questions. It is polite to guage the interest of someone before making a move on them. If this requires “games”, then so be it. If the person is interested and you are still interested, both parties will continue the courtship. The problem arises when one person is not really interested in the other person, but the other person is not aware that they are being “gamed”. I’m sorry to say this, but the only way for the other person to learn that there is no common interest is to learn it the hard way. I have had to learn the hard way that a “gamer” is really not interested in me; I’ve learned to move on and not be fixated on the gamer.

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
9:15 am

Morning All – It’s Friday, yayyy!!!

I thought we discussed this last week, with the cat and mouse discussion?

I’ll come back later, when we’re discussing weekend plans!

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

April 8th, 2011
9:16 am

Morning
EVERYONE has game. Shoot, the “No Game” game is the one that works the best. Dating is fun, and I enjoy the game. It’s not a big deal. Life is good.

Reggie

April 8th, 2011
9:17 am

Hate the playah, not the Game. If you get “Gamed”, that’s just the way it rolls. No sense getting your panties in a wad about it. It’s happened before and it will happen again. In fact, it’s probably happened and you never know and STILL don’t know. It’s a part of life.

SlimNumeroUno

April 8th, 2011
9:19 am

Good mawnin yawnin :-)

Triple H

April 8th, 2011
9:24 am

It’s time to play The Game. It’s all about the Game and how you can play it.It’s all about control and who can take it.It’s all about your debt and if you can pay it. It’s all about the pain and who’s going to make it. I am The Game and you don’t want to play with me. I am control, no way you can change me. I am the debt, no way you can pay me. I am the pain and I know you can’t take me.

SexyCool

April 8th, 2011
9:25 am

kimmie – I was thinking the same thing.

(Finally digging out from under a million boxes…..mopving su-huuuuuxxxx!!

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
9:33 am

SCool – So you did close? Congrats!!

I am leaving early today to go home and continue packing myself. Yes, moving suxxxxxxx!!!!

Ronnie

April 8th, 2011
9:39 am

The only “game” I like playing is Nekid Twister, but that’s just me.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

April 8th, 2011
9:48 am

Congrats, SexyC! When’s the house warming party? :-D

Simple Man!!!!

April 8th, 2011
9:52 am

Morning All!!! Er’body ready for the weekend I hope!!!

Scool, When is teh housewarming and What bottle do I need to bring??? :) :D :)

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

April 8th, 2011
9:57 am

Congrats SexyC

Dan - Simply....Superior

April 8th, 2011
9:59 am

Congrats, Ms. Cool (hope to be joining you soon – in homeownership)

@kimmie

You’re moving? Like leaving the A? Where you moving to?

Matt

April 8th, 2011
10:04 am

All about how you play the game in my book, I am too old to deal with a girl that will lie and be with other guys while I court her. Games, absolutely, and btw, for the person that said that people that don’t play games will stay at home and never do anything, that is bs, even when I didn’t play games I was still traveling when ever I wanted, skydived had awesome parties, rode motorcycles, etc. etc. I make a great wage for my age, and I live a very exciting life, however, I don’t have the time at 30 to waste with girls that lie and cheat, they can have it all with excitement or they can play the “game” playful yes, don’t make it impossible to really find someone getting caught up in the “game”, I have already decided that foreign girls are the way to go, I have about 10 friends all with great women, all from other countries, american girls just don’t get it sometimes. Those 10 friends also have better relationships with each other then anyone else I know. American girls that I know just got too greedy

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
10:06 am

Dan – I am moving into my fiance’ house. My sister is going to rent my house. Her lease is up at the end of this month so I need to be out.

It’s more than a notion, though! Trying to combine 2 households, his and mine. Luckily I am leaving alot of my stuff in the house for my sister, like the major appliances.

Dan - Simply....Superior

April 8th, 2011
10:09 am

But.are.you.leaving the A?

And Kimmie, I know, buleeevveee me, I know.

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
10:14 am

Dan – No, just up the road, from College Park to Smyrna! :)

Dan - Simply....Superior

April 8th, 2011
10:22 am

Then Hola Vato loko.

And why is either of y’all complaining? You changing sides of town.

Git back with me co-ordinating State moves

#uhaulsucks

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
10:27 am

Dan – LOL!!! But yeah, out of state would be WAY more of a challenge!

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

April 8th, 2011
10:39 am

Out of state, across town, across the street…have done them all, and they all suck. lol kimmie you moving up on the north side. welcome!

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
10:48 am

Thanks Dreams! Yeah, I’m movin on up!

Actually at one point I lived not far from Smyrna, in Marietta. It was my first place after finishing college and leaving home in SWATS . Then I lived in Austell for a few years, then bought my house in CP.

You are right, moving sux any way it goes! I hate packing and unpacking!

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

April 8th, 2011
10:57 am

Thanks Dreams! Yeah, I’m movin on up!
kimmie it’s funny how you can actually become isolated. I tell my homeboy in College Park that he might as well live in Florida because I get to College Park about as much as I get to Florida. lol I’m hardly ever south of Buckhead these days, unless I’m going to the airport. lol

Dan - Simply....Superior

April 8th, 2011
10:59 am

@Dreams

Me being on the Westside, the homie in Perimeter is forever wanting someone to ride “waaale up there.”

@Kimmie

Cobb is good, if you’re near East/West connector, you can get N.E.where

AmazonRed™ - back from vacay

April 8th, 2011
11:05 am

Morning all –

Congrats to all the movers out there. I feel for you. But at least folks are movin on up!

The only game I’ve knowingly played is the game of “tease.” He’ll think i’m going to stop “fighting the feelings” and go for it…while I always know where the line in the sand is drawn. And I don’t cross it. :lol:

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
11:06 am

Dreams – That is true with a lot of people, especially transplants. But being a native ATLian and SWATS resident, a lot of my family and friends are still on the southside. The SWATS neighborhood I grew up in is established and still beautiful. My house in CP is established too, most homes were built there in 90-91. I have a few cousins over in Fayetteville down the street and a few friends in the Camp Creek area. If you watch the news you’d believe it’s nothing but crime on the southside. Not true.

I work up here in Alpharetta, and all I see & hear are cops! :shock:

AmazonRed™ - back from vacay

April 8th, 2011
11:09 am

kimmie – Yeah, I love it over here. Besides, I’m in the city anyway, so everything is close. The only trips I dread are OTP…like Alpharetta. They weren’t trying to be close to the city. I can’t believe you make that drive everyday! :cry:

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

April 8th, 2011
11:13 am

“Out of state, across town, across the street…have done them all, and they all suck”

Man, you’re not lying… When I was in college, I moved 6 times in 5 years (um, yeah, I partied a lil’ bit…)… The worst was moving from one unit to another in the same complex: Had to go downstairs, across a parking lot, down more stairs (the other building was kind of in a hole), then up stairs to the new apartment. It s#cked donkey ballz:lol:

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
11:14 am

Amred – I can’t believe it either! It’s not so bad in the morning and going thru downtown is actually quicker and easier than taking 285 to 400. Smyrna will be closer.

I have a great job and fantastic boss, so it’s the sacrifice I make! Even had a chance to transfer downtown and was tempted because I’ve worked downtown before and loved it. But my current situation is too good to give up right now!

AmazonRed™ - back from vacay

April 8th, 2011
11:19 am

kimmie – Having a good situation is definitely a blessing. I was considering a job in Flowery Branch… I dunno. But a girl I know who lives in Camp Creek does it daily so…

I love love love working in Midtown/Dowtown. Especially in the spring/ summer. Alll the happy hour patio spots are close…Wednesday Wind Down is close. I’m so geeked. :lol:

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
11:24 am

Amred – I’ve had 3 jobs downtown, and I loved them all. The most fun was at CNN! Yes, Centennial Park right outside for WWD!

We went to a lunchtime outside jazz set over in the Failey-Poplar area once back then. All the eateries had tables you could eat at outside and some folks had lawn chairs set up in the street area they had blocked off in front of the stage. Wonder if they still do that?

Fun times!

AmazonRed™ - back from vacay

April 8th, 2011
11:39 am

Amred – I’ve had 3 jobs downtown, and I loved them all. The most fun was at CNN! Yes, Centennial Park right outside for WWD!

Oh yes. I used to work at the Georgia Dome. Talk about being right by all the action! The GWCC has it’s own cafeteria for employees too, with subsidized pricing (meaning cheap food :lol: ). Dang… it was good over there!

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

April 8th, 2011
11:42 am

“We went to a lunchtime outside jazz set over in the Failey-Poplar area once back then.”

kimmie — I used to hang out there every day at lunch back when I was contracting w/ the state. I probably stared at your booty & never even knew it…. :lol:

AmazonRed™ - back from vacay

April 8th, 2011
11:42 am

kimmie

April 8th, 2011
11:45 am

swiss you are an idiot!!! :lol:

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

April 8th, 2011
11:52 am

← Now going through my database of booty mental images, trying to determine which one might be kimmie:lol:

Sassy Me...Juicy Fruit :-)

April 8th, 2011
11:58 am

I’ve had 3 jobs downtown, and I loved them all. The most fun was at CNN! Yes, Centennial Park right outside for WWD!

I used to live downtown right down the street from the CNN…I could look out of my window and see the building and Centennial Park wasn’t even a five minute walk from the front door of my apartment building so I totally understand loving downtown. During the summer on Friday/Saturday evenings my gay friends and I would stand outside and people watch or flirt with cute guys driving/walking by. When I moved to my home onthe southside I was kinda sick for a while….I still miss living downtown but I love my house more….fond memories.

Simple Man!!!!

April 8th, 2011
12:50 pm

Ghost town…(where is everyone???)

cba

April 8th, 2011
12:57 pm

They are all “gamed-out”

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

April 8th, 2011
1:10 pm

“(where is everyone???)”

Whew!!!!! Stay away from the egg salad, that’s all I can say… Oh… gotta run… again…

:lol:

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

April 8th, 2011
1:37 pm

Well d@mn! It really is a ghost town in here today… If y’all have slipped away to have a blog 0rgy without inviting me, there’s gonna be hell to pay… :lol:

Simple Man!!!!

April 8th, 2011
1:38 pm

Did somebody say Blog Orgy?????

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

April 8th, 2011
1:41 pm

I thought that might wake some folks up…. :lol: