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Dating: If you use me, you lose me

If single people listed their top 10 most annoying things about dating in Atlanta, I would bet that being used ranks pretty high. There is no way to get around it, and many of us are guilty of it ourselves.

Going out on a date with someone you have absolutely no physical attraction to because you are bored? You, my friend are a user. Keeping someone around for pseudo-dating because they make a great arm ornament? Yep, use. use. use.

So if it happens so much, and we are all guilty of it, is it always a bad thing? How is it avoidable? How would you feel if someone you met and really liked, used you for a specific come up. Would it be a deal breaker?

I am often asked by guy friends for help in recognizing when they are being used by women. Ladies, can you give men tips on when women are using them? What ways have you used a guy, and did it backfire? If so, how did you pay for it later?

Guys  how can you advise a woman when a guy is using her for personal gain? (I know, this means you may to confess your romantic crimes and put yourself on blast)

Aren’t two people who really like each other supposed to rely on one another if they are able to provide something? Shouldn’t men be able to show how he can protect, provide, and support a woman? Shouldn’t a woman be able to demonstrate how she can be dependable, nurturing, and reliable for her man?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

156 comments Add your comment

Simple Man!!!!

April 4th, 2011
4:51 pm

We’re good….Its a nice day…Wewi ll let the top back so your hair can flow just like I like it….

Lord Velonese

April 4th, 2011
4:54 pm

Yall are funny, Stalking is not my M.O.

Simple Man!!!!

April 4th, 2011
4:58 pm

Lord V…yeah paying ain’t mine either, But CZ is putting in work while her Mr. is out of town, so imma just roll with it!!!

Willie Dynamite

April 4th, 2011
5:08 pm

yeah yeah yeah. Walk like a duck, quack like a duck I’ll call yo azz Daffy.

Geechee

April 4th, 2011
7:44 pm

Hopy you guys are well.. Geechee’s at the beachee.

[...] Dating: If you use me, you lose me, an article from the AJC was an interesting read, especially the comments that people posted.  I feel like men do feel used when women go on dates with them nowadays. Sometimes I feel like it’s not the intentions of a woman to use a man for a few drinks, or to use them just to have something to do…we, as women, want to date to get to know someone. I need men to understand that dating is expensive. I see it every time i’m out on a date. I order even just a burger for $8.50, some fries for $1.50 and a margarita for $8.00 and that’s not too bad. But most of the time we have an appetizer, he is eating, he has a drink too, and we have at least 2 drinks a piece. That adds up. We are not being greedy or spending up your damn money, that’s how much it costs when you go on  a friggin date!! And that’s an economical date to like Fox Sports grill or Applebee’s. I hate that men see spending money as such a problem. Like, “I spent $50 on her meal b/c she kept ordering drinks, then she don’t want to come over, or hang out for free.” Why did you ask her out if you didn’t expect to spend money? Why not tell her before you go what your budget is? So many men are about acting like they have so much money and status that they take us to these restaurants and say “have another drink” “what do you want to do next,” if you can’t afford the date or the possibility that you are spending money on someone that may end up not being interested in you then you need not date! Bottom line! If you are going to be mad if she orders more than one drink, then why not tell her up front?! [...]