accessAtlanta

City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

How do you pull off going Dutch?

I received an email from one of our male readers seeking some advice.  He wants to know if it’s possible to go Dutch on a date without sending the wrong message.  Is there a way to successfully ask someone out, plan an outing, and go on a date paying your own way or splitting the costs?

Do you think it can be done if you pick the right person and circumstances?

In my experience, going Dutch was only bad because of the “caught off guard” situations.  You know, that time when someone asks you out and don’t mention that they have no intentions of paying your way.  If you know beforehand that you wanted the date to be Dutch, you should say so. Give the person the opportunity to make a fully informed decision before agreeing to it.

What do you think? Does going Dutch automatically mean it’s a “bad” date?  When was the last time you paid your own way on a date?  What did you and how did it come to be a “Dutch” date?

It you had to pick between no date and going Dutch, which would you pick?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

345 comments Add your comment

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
7:22 am

Morning all,

Going Dutch on a first date to me is a no no, not because I can’t pay my own way, but because it comes off as a bit tacky. Is that the first impresion you want to give me? Now, I have no problem at all going Dutch if we’ve been seeing each other for awhile. But like Diva said, I’d prefer someone not wait til the bill comes befere you tell me that’s what we’re doing. I’ve done the whole, I buy the movie tickets and you pay for the snacks thing and that works just fine. But going Dutch on a first date to me is almost like someone paying for dinner with a coupon on the first date. I know times are hard but it just sends out the wrong vibe for me.

CoolShadow

March 9th, 2011
7:40 am

Come On Now – your post confirmed my belief of the impossibility of a man asking to go Dutch on a first date without being labeled as cheap. After establishing some familiarity with a woman, perhaps maybe. Ditto on the coupon too.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
8:12 am

When was the last time you went out on a date and paid your own way? Every time I have been on a date I paid my own way. You must be talking to the women. If I ask a woman out I pay for the date. Now when I as dating seriously, I have had the woman ask to pay at times but I politely declined. But as far as going dutch on a date I can not remember one time when I paid my tab and my date paid hers. I personally don’t think “dutch” should happen if you ask someone out…..save your money and don’t ask her out until you can afford to pay for both tabs.

Yes She Is Cute

March 9th, 2011
8:23 am

Good morning everybody!

If it’s dutch its not a date plain and simple. Only dutch I’m doing is a man from the netherlands thats it. hehehe jk.

Hope all is well…..

2CPTG - wakin' up from a long nap!

March 9th, 2011
8:30 am

Going Dutch on the the first date should be a prerequisite! If it’s “par for the course,” that I pay, well, at the end of the night, keep the tradition going!

btw, what’s up, y’all……

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
8:31 am

Purple Rain–do you believe that the man should ALWAYS pay for the date, regardless of whether he did the asking out or not? My parents and their generation feel that way. But a lot of men nowadays feel that women should pay sometimes….or maybe at least offer to pay. But some women offer to pay, knowing full well they have no intention of paying, just so the guy will think that they’re not all about the money.

All I know is if I don’t know you and it’s a first date and you want us to go Dutch, there probably won’t be a second date.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
8:39 am

Come on Now, yes I believe a man should always pay whether he did the asking out or not. I would feel really uncomfortable if my date paid my way. If it were a birthday gift/dinner date I would let it slide. Now that I am married and we have a joint account it does not matter who pays but I still usually do.

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
8:41 am

I’mma ask you to pay your own way on a first date, and I expect you to be prepared to do so.

As I tell my neice: “never take anything, - anything - from a man without a clear expression of why he is giving it to you. Ask when he offers and confirm before you take it.”

As stated here before, if you’re an “I am woman” kinda chick, then follow that logic through to its conclusion; similarly, if you’re a more traditional chick, follow that logic through as well.

If a person wants consistency, they have to give it.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
8:42 am

I agree with YSIC if it is dutch it is not a date. And guys if you take a woman out and she insists on paying for her part of the tab that is a sign of things to come. Either she doesn’t like you and does not want to send the impression that she does or you have a woman who is overly independent and “don’t need a man to do nothing for her”

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
8:43 am

“He wants to know if it’s possible to go Dutch on a date without sending the wrong message”.

First Date? Simple answer is yes…if he treasures being alone.

Early in a relationship, as practical as it seems, coupons and “dutch” are deal killers. Once a relationship takes hold then maybe some. I wouldn’t do it now because I make enough money that it doesn’t have a material effect on me, but that was not always the case.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
8:43 am

Are we really in a world where courting or gestures of kindness are now thought to always have a hidden agenda?

Roekest

March 9th, 2011
8:44 am

Things Women Should Not Be Asked To Do While With a Man:

- Pay for dinner
- Drive
- Open the door
- Fend off muggers and bums
- and other things I cannot think of right now.

Men have become infantilized in the past 20 years. As a man (not a boy), I find this disturbing. You can’t raise a generation of children if mom does all the work and dad acts like he’s still in college. Then again, hopefully most women aren’t stupid enough to marry a man-child who still does keg stands past the age of 30.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
8:44 am

Purple Rain–Wow. I don’t meet too many man nowadays you feel the way you do. Now, I have no problem paying for a date every now and then, but for me, that’s normally after we’ve been dating for quite a while. But I guess I subscribe more to my parents’ line of thinking. My dad has always said that a man should always pay, regardless.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
8:45 am

Also however, i do think that the one that does the asking is the one that pays the tab. If in a relationship, i ask her, I am obligated. If she asks me, she is obligated to at least offer.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
8:47 am

Come On Now, and I bet your parents are happily married aren’t they? Nothing wrong with following the example that was set by them. My dad raised me to be a man and I observed him doing those things as well.

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
8:50 am

@PR – yeap

Even if the agenda is upfront and the intentions are stated, there are some ladies with (rightfully) suspicious minds based on experience.

We are also in an age where a woman may legitimately not need or desire the traditional treatment, and you have to respect that too.

My issue is the flip-flopping.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
8:50 am

When I was married, she paid the tab some…because I gave her all the money. Too many times I had to go to Sams Club and have their samples for lunch because I didn’t have two dollars for a Taco Bell. Not much left after paying for her therapy from her effed up childhood ;-)

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
8:53 am

Based on some of the blogs, I was trying to remember if I have ever sent the signal that “I paid for dinner, you owe me”. I don’t think so. I guess I never considered a dinner part of payment for a (fill in the blank).

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
8:55 am

Purple Rain-Yep. My parents have been happily married for 40 years. Now that they”re married of course they have a joint account so it doesn’t matter, but when they were dating it was always my dad paying. I don’t think my mom ever offered to pay. But my dad didn’t mind because he was raised to always pay. I just think we’ve gotten so far away from that generation’s way of doing things. I know times have changed but I think that some things should never really go out of style.

Ali14

March 9th, 2011
8:57 am

if a man asks a woman out for the first time, he should pay. i went on a date with this guy and when the bill came he said, “you can get the tip”. i said, “excuse me?” i was in shock. i am now with my boyfriend of 5 years, and he still hates for me to pay.

i also agree with Randyt (aka “I resemble this)…if you do the asking, you should feel obligated to pay.

Kiss of a Rose

March 9th, 2011
8:57 am

I have done the dutch thing, it will cause you to be alone. If you don’t see a future with this woman, I will say go dutch. If you do see a future with this woman, spend that money. I have done the dutch thing in my early 20’s, it has burn me alot of times.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
8:57 am

Yeah, and why does it have to be the “I paid for dinner now you owe me”. That’s so dumb. I can’t stand when people do something ALWAYS expecting something in return.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
8:58 am

Dan I guess my small town upbringing influenced my thought process and set the “standard” for dating. To this day, the guy asks the parents and most know the parents in some form or fashion before asking one of my sisters out for a date. If the woman is a full blown adult or college student the guy better still come correct and act like a man. It is just standard practice, I could see and have seen how environments can taint the courting process. Where everyone basically does not know everyone or that there are to many degrees of separation.

MC Hammock

March 9th, 2011
9:02 am

Dutch should be the exception and not the rule. CERTAINLY, you don’t go Dutch on the first date. By and large, men who go all out in the beginning are shackling themselves for the long run. A man’s best behavior will be the minimum that is expected from him in the future. A woman’s best behavior will be the maximum that is expected from her. Societies rules, not mine.

Only Dutch it when it’s an informal date or when it’s “just friends”. If there is more involved, only go Dutch when she suggests it, but assume that you will handle the entire bill.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
9:05 am

@ MCH re: “A man’s best behavior will be the minimum that is expected from him in the future”.

Well said…and too true.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
9:06 am

If a woman sleeps with you after just you taking her out she would have slept with you even if you did not take her out. And if a guy tries to sleep with you after a date because he took you out he does not hold that woman in high regard. If its just sex that is the end goal it is better to be upfront. Now if you sleep with me and it’s a satisfactory performance. You may get a dinner date etc. LOL

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
9:06 am

MC Hammock, that is spot on.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
9:11 am

Is Buddy wanting to go Dutch for financial reasons or those based on the principle of the matter?

If it’s money related, Buddy should be dating within his financial abilities. He should not plan activities that he cannot afford. There are plenty of things that a couple should be able to do that is fun and creative and not denting in your light bill money.

This goes back to just what I said at the end of the day yesterday, if your money ain’t right, you need to focus on getting it right.

If it’s about a principle, then…this has been my experience, I have not been asked on a *date* and then asked to pay.

Oh wait…I’m lying…I was asked out once to the movies to meet this guy and when I got there, he had already paid for his ticket and was inside the theater, “saving me a seat”. Yeah…he turned out to be a real loser.

Another time, I met a guy at the movies and because of some conversation that we’d had prior to our first date, I expected to pay for my own ticket, but when I got there, he was already waiting with my ticket in his hand.

Basically, it is my belief that any guy that expects me to go Dutch on a first date or a date where he has done the inviting, then he is not that interested in impressing me.

And I believe that if I ask, I pay. To this day, that’s the way I am in my relationship with TheDude.

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
9:11 am

@Hammock – riiiiiggghhht that happens.

Everyone lives up to “societies” expectations.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
9:13 am

@PR re: “If a woman sleeps with you after just you taking her out she would have slept with you even if you did not take her out”.

I am inclined to agree with this. In my experience, a woman is sleeping with ME and I am sleeping with HER because there is chemistry, not because we had a good date.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
9:13 am

Basically a man spends his time and money on what he values. If he is giving you neither, then guess what you are not getting the real him only a temporary stand in.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
9:16 am

LOL, I guess some men don’t care about making an impression on a woman.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
9:16 am

Honestly, money has little to do with a “good date” if one uses some imagination (and the weather cooperates). A picnic at Stone Mtn and the laser show…cheap. Add a bottle of wine, some fruit or snacks, maybe wings, bring some actual tableware and real glasses…cheap but impressive. Imaagination, not money, is the key.

TenderRoni

March 9th, 2011
9:33 am

Morning,
Good to read you men this morning.

Ali14

March 9th, 2011
9:35 am

@Randyt—–> nice!

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
9:38 am

Randyt—totally agree. If you really don’t have the money, then come up with something fun that’s not as expensive. I personally find your suggestion more appealing for a date anyway. I frankly get bored just going to dinner. Imagination really is key.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
9:43 am

Good day..

The issue of going dutch is real but I think the best form of security is prevention….i.e., he should not even get in this situation in the first place on the first date none the less..

The best thing for him to do is go online and pick a good non franchise restaurant that is in his price range (some places put their menu’s online). That way he knows the price range going in and he doesnt have to ask to go dutch.

Pick places that are within your price range and their are a lot of options!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
9:43 am

Randyt, you know some guy will tell the woman to bring all of that stuff and he will bring the blanket and the condoms. lol

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
9:46 am

Good morning.

I see nothing wrong with paying for dinner with a coupon on the first date. Nothing at all. But, going dutch on a first date is not a date. I thought you go dutch with people you don’t necessarily want to get close to (lol). If a man asks me out, he pays. If I ask him out, I pay. If you spring “dutch” on me when the tab arrives, I’m leaving you there (even if we came in your car).

mark

March 9th, 2011
9:47 am

gentlmen we should always pay for the entire date! ALWATS!! chivary is not DEAD.. my mother told me that from an early age.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
9:49 am

mark I agree, it’s not dead but some men are trying to kill it on the sly

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
9:49 am

Roekest – That whole kegstand thing is just illogical to me…at any age.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
9:51 am

Morning
You can’t compare courting 50 years ago to courting today. In the past men paid becasue women didn’t have the means to pay. Women didn’t work or have any income, so if a man wanted her company, then he had to pay. Women work now and have many more freedoms, but they still expect the guy to pay. They’re having their cake and eating it too. They want women’s lib to apply only when it’s convenient. I used to try and fight this off principle alone, but it’s a losing battle. Women generally don’t care about the principle, only about what benefits them. I accept that it’s one of those things you can’t really change, so I pay.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
9:51 am

Biking on the Silver Comet, tour Fernbank, a few hours in Centennial park and walk into CNN, walking around the park at Lake Lanier, a hike up to a waterfall, day trip to one of the small towns around ATL…just find something, i.e. picnic, wine, anything to enhance it. It isn’t about how much money you drop, it is about how much thought you put into it. You don’t have to drop a couple of hundred at Ray’s to impress, just THINK.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
9:54 am

Mark-No, chivalry is not dead but men AND women are trying to kill it.

And I’m sorry, but paying with a coupon on a first date is NOT cool.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
9:54 am

@ PR yeah but good condoms, and a real blanket can be pricey. LOL, so no Boones Farm or Mad Dog.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
9:56 am

Seriously did any of you used to write a letter or make a tape/cd of songs that reminded you of the woman, play them when she got in the car and then give it to her. Actually call her instead of text her. Knocked on her door to ask her out and not call from the cell or blow the horn from the driveway or call saying you are about to pull up and to come out. Or respect her and her time by not calling her late at night. Bring her a flower on the first date or leave one in the passenger seat of your car so she saw it when you opened the door for her. Dating hasn’t changed guys have just got lazy stop taking charge and started making excuses. If she is so hard up and a gold digger or ms independent you should find another who will appreciate your efforts.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:01 am

DM-Just because as a woman I have the means to pay for things does not mean that now courting or dating should be that much different than it was 50 years ago. I don’t see anything wrong with a woman expecting a man to pay for their date.

Slightly off topic, I think that some of us women don’t require men to do enough, because of the whole “I’m independent, I got my owne and don’t need you to do anything for me”. Hence the reason why a lot of men now feel they don’t have to do certain things. I expect you to open my car door, the restaurant door and any other door we might come in contact with. And I expect you to pay for my date, whether that date costs $25 or $100.

There’s just some things I’m not willing to compromise on, no matter how many years have passed.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:01 am

Come on Now, I know I may get chirped for this but I agree with you. No coupon on the first date.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:02 am

Come on Now, don’t ever change!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:02 am

Are you new or just using a different name?

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:03 am

Purple Rain–AMEN!

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:05 am

Purple Rain-I’m new. I’ve been “lurking” for quite a few months and have enjoyed reading everyone’s comments. I finally decided about a week ago to contribute so here I am :-)

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:06 am

Why is paying with a coupon not good? Heck, I love KC Pit BBQ and use to have coupons to eat there. You’re still out on the date, enjoying each other’s company. Is it really about him dishing out money. Food w/the coupons, drinks out of his own pocket, may have to pay for parking. I guess it’s just me. I’ll go back to my corner.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
10:08 am

In this economy some men are willing to pay for a night out. Things like this should never change it ought to be in his instincts and not on his ego for impressive purposes but to say to her with out using any words I got you covered. There also things you can do that cost nothing it’s all about using imagination.

Raining And It’s Still A Great Day:

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:09 am

Leggs-No, it’s not about the money. For me, it’s jut not a good first impression. If we’re exclusively dating then you can pull out the coupons. But on a first date? I’m sorry but I’m going to have to say no. If you don’t have the cash to pay outright for it on the first date then choose something else. But that’s just my preference.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:14 am

Blackfoote, great comment.

Leggs, one might wonder if the only reason you can go to said establishment is because he had a coupon? Not saying it’s bad to use them…just don’t use them on a first date.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:14 am

Same token he should not overspend either on a first date. Whatever standard you set is the one you have to keep up.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
10:15 am

@Blackfoote

I understand that some guys are willing to drop a lot on women but also alot of guys have to be careful not to spend a lot of money on a woman they just met. I say for the first date, the maximum is $50.00 because you don’t know anything about the woman so you are getting to know her. She may not even be worth that. She may just be a happy hour, applebee/chili’s margarita type. Guys just have to be careful not to send the wrong message by spending to much money on the first date.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:16 am

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
10:17 am

because as a woman I have the means to pay for things does not mean that now courting or dating should be that much different than it was 50 years ago.
COME Sure it does, at least based on the way I presented the argument. If courting was based on the socioeconomic standing of a woman, then when that standing changes the method of courting should also change because it’s based on that standing to begin with.

Now I know it’s just a matter of time before the “If a man has to keep a tab of how much he paid, then…blah blah blah” crew comes in. It’s always easy for them to say this because there’s never anything on their tab. lol

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:18 am

I agree with your post M. .

@PR ~ I guess that would enter one’s mind.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
10:20 am

Come out of that corner…..LOL
We have varying degrees of preferences here and yours is not any less than any other. But dude should hold back on the coupons till the next time out

Whats Up Purple:

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
10:20 am

From my point of view, the fact that a guy does use coupons makes a good impression. It tells me that he is not going to pay more for something than he has to just because it looks good. IMO, that’s evidence of practical money management skills.

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
10:21 am

“Should she pay…shouldn’t she pay”

The economics have changed…but not the social etiquette. Man should still pay. Above and beyond that, if the woman pays and you two hit it off, then the man loses a few points/edge in the power struggle game which eventually develops either a little or a lot.

As strange and cruel as it sounds, money (control of) and power (real or imagined) still go hand in hand.

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
10:22 am

@PR – (9:13) exactly right

@PR – (9:16) – Right again

The point of a date is not for me to impress her, it’s for us to decide if we like each other at all and enough to go forward on more dates.

If, at the end of a first meeting, I’m impressed and she’s impressed, if I ask her out again, of course I’m paying. If there is no mutual impression, we exchange church hugs and KIP.

The confusion lies in between: custom, chilvary, and experience.

Custom is what’s been done, chivalry is what should be done, and experience is what has worked/not worked.

If there is a tension between the three, both parties should go with their gut IMO.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:22 am

M.-Agreed. Please believe if I decide to take my man out and pay, I’m going to take him somewhere that’s in my price range…whatever that may be. If I don’t have 5 star money, I’m not going to take you to a 5 star restaurant because that’s me just perpetrating. Same thing goes for a man. Don’t go into debt trying to woo a woman. That’s not a good look. Because like M. said, the standard you set in the beginning is what you will be expected to keep up.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:22 am

LOL @ Blackfoote! Great, cuz no one puts Baby in the corner!

I’m with you, SexyC. Guess they’re saying coupons are good just not on the first date. It seems to say something about your character.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
10:23 am

@Leggs

Thanks just my thoughts. I think every guy messed up and blew too much money on a first date. Do you remember last year we had this conversation and one of the guys (he will remain nameless) said he dropped $250.00 on the first date? #OHNO!

DJ Sniper

March 9th, 2011
10:25 am

Whenever I’ve asked a woman on a date, I’ve always done so with the notion of paying for the date. There have been situations where we may have gone more than one place and she offered to pick up the tab for something, but I’ve never suggested that we go dutch. Then again, I’ve never been the type to drop a buttload of money on a date early on in the process. I don’t get dudes who do that, then complain when stuff doesn’t really go their way. Keep it light and you’ll be fine.

Somebody earlier mentioned that driving is something a woman shouldn’t do when she’s with a man. I gotta disagree with that one. There’s nothing wrong with the woman driving from time to time.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
10:25 am

I’ve not ever dated anyone for any real length of time that did not impress me in some way.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
10:25 am

M.:

Absolutely you can’t just fling cash around like it’s confetti unles you’re a rapper or want to be baller. But good judgement is your best defense.

Decaturite

March 9th, 2011
10:26 am

It makes a bad impression if the man invites but expects the woman to go dutch. If he plans a hike and packs sandwiches and fruit and takes her for a hike or to fly a kite, that is plenty impressive. The couple can stop for hot chocolate at Starbucks on the way back. If she earns reasonable money and he doesn’t, I think it would be nice if she offered to pay her own way, hypothetically.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
10:26 am

Who cares if I pay with cash, a coupon, a favor, or washing dishes? What does it mean? I can eat at any establishment I want and pay cash, but why would I if I can save money? Who would do that? The LA fitness by my job offers a discount to employees at our company. While I can comfortably pay the full price, why in the world would I not take advantage of the discount? To prove to some superficial people that I can? Seriously??? If I’m on a date with you, it’s becaue I want to spend time with you. I don’t care about all the that extra, just want to spend time with you.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:27 am

@M. ~ I most certainly do remember the convo last year and it popped in my head as well.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
10:27 am

@COME ON NOW

Yup how you start is how you end. You cant just start her at Ruth Chris and next date switch it up to Golden Coral…lol shes going to look at you crazy.

And honestly I think women would look at a guy crazy if he spends a lot of money on every woman he meets. Like if you had a brother, cousin, guy friend and everytime you see him, he is on a $200 date, he would look foolish, Am I right?

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:28 am

Again, my point, DreamsM!

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:29 am

DM-your 10:17, sorry, but i don’t agree. I guess I’m straight up old school because I don’t care if I have a lot of money, I still expect the man to pay for the date. I think I’m going to listen to my parents on this one.

If a man has a problem paying for a date then don’t date. Plain and simple.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:29 am

@M. ~ all depends on how he rolls. If he’s swinging from the rafters like they do in Dubai, then no, he wouldn’t look foolish! :wink:

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:33 am

Flipside, if he is using a coupon that does not mean that he is frugal, he could have found a good deal this one time and decided to take it. All of your other dates will be at the McDonald’s 2 Big Macs for the price of one for the rest of the month…..No upsize. LOL

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
10:34 am

@Leggs

Ok glad you remembered that convo. Thats the thing that hit me lol $250.00 I wonder how it worked out with her?

Also ladies I saw on a blog yesterday where the writer was saying how some women think they are in relationships when they really arent.

Example: Ladies if he is still taking you to restaurants with pictures on the menu, you need to step your game up LOL so true! Most nice places print the menus and no pictures!

Randyt (aka "I resemble this)

March 9th, 2011
10:35 am

“it’s for us to decide if we like each other at all and enough to go forward on more dates”

What I want is to move to “comfortable” as quickly as possible because “dating” can be a tad superficial. For me, the pattern I try to stick with is this…
Date 1…nice medium level restaurant, i.e Carrabas, Pappadeaux, Ippolitos…good conversation, maybe go after dinner for a glass of wine somewhere more quiet.
Date 2…day trip, Stone Mountain maybe, maybe a hike (not killer, just pleasant)…
Date 3…cook together, my house or hers, soft music on sound system, good wine, maybe a slow dance in the kitchen (okay this is important for the ones who may not be getting the message, but this means guys not sprawling your azz out on the couch with the Playstation 3 while she cooks, GET IT!!)…

Date 4 This one is interesting, you need to, IMHO, find a “comfort” date…fun but low stress. Cheap dinner at Taco Mac and home to watch a Blu Ray.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:35 am

@PR ~ first part of your post on point. Second part sounds like you spilled some McDee coffee in your lap and can now only speak jibberish.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:37 am

Hey, if you want to use coupons on a first date then by all means do so. For me it’s not cool on a first date. I’m not opposed to them using them ever, just not on a first date.

Let’s be real, the whole LA Fitness discount thing: people don’t automatically know that you are using a discount when you go there to workout. But a person knows that you are using a coupon on a date cuz they see you pull that badboy out.

It’s not about being superficial, but for me, I just don’t think it appropriate to use one on a first date. But hey, some women don’t have a problem with a guy using coupons on a first date. Just find the person that is like-minded in that regard and you should have no problem.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
10:38 am

I guess I’m straight up old school because I don’t care if I have a lot of money, I still expect the man to pay for the date.
COME Like I said in my first post, this topic is always a losing battle for guys. Women get to have their cake and eat it too on this one. It’s just the way it is. You just get labeled as cheap or not a “real” man, no matter how logical your argument is. I go along with the norm, not because I agree, but because it’s better to know which battles to fight, and this one ain’t worth the casualties. lol

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
10:38 am

P-lito – Whether or not someone is a Frugal Freddie or Broke-O is something that would be discovered during the process of getting to know him better.

One thing that can become fairly evident is a person’s financial personality, if not necessarily their financial status. It is up to me to make a decision about whether to continue developing this relationship or part company based on what I learn.

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
10:39 am

Morning crew!

Purple, I’m really feeling you this morning! :)

Dutch in it’s purist form is only for when I go out with friends and coworkers. It’s not a date, I don’t care how you all put it. I’m with Purple, a man spends his time and money on what he values. Period. Now, absolutely, I help out once we are established and at times cover everything. A dude won’t get the benefit of my generosity if he doesn’t come correct and stick around though. But whomever does the asking does the paying, that’s the way I was taught and the way I roll.

As for the flip-flopping with the womens independence thing, men use it to their advantage as well. They play the “women want to be equal” card when they see it might benefit them or they want to justify being cheap and sorry. Men can argue that women are getting over till the cows come home. Too many dudes nowadays don’t want to be real men. They are confused. You men can get mad at me all you want, but I’m not debating it. Yeah, I said it and that’s how I feel and nothing is going to change it. Whining over some tired dudes pennies puts a bad taste in my mouth anyway. If you can’t hang with the big boys, take your ball and go home. Or like other smart men on the blog have said today, do things within your means. Quit making yourself look silly trying to lead with an empty wallet instead of the good sense God gave you.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
10:40 am

@Randyt

I see your system but I dont agree with the date 3 idea really. Im not sure if Im really trying to eat her cooking just yet. Everybody who thinks they can cook really cant cook lol.

And the slow dancing by the dishwasher lol….Do your thing Randyt lol…

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
10:43 am

Whining over some tired dudes pennies puts a bad taste in my mouth anyway.
Did I call it or what? Love you kimmie! ;-)

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
10:44 am

One other useless bit of information…don’t ever get such a fat head that you don’t think you can learn a few new tricks.
Watch a woman’s body language,
LISTEN, don’t be selling so dayum hard,
Move the conversation around to different topics until you see a light come on in her eyes, and then explore that,
Don’t be afraid to ask her about the path that brought her to this time and place.
Simply stated, show INTEREST in HER…she will reciprocate at the proper time if she is a keeper.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:45 am

You see, M., RandyT’s Date #3 sounds like a lot of fun. Cooking together is another way of learning things about a person. Plus, there’s a lot of laughter when cooking together.

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
10:46 am

I understand your concern re the cooking M, so I tend to steer it toward my house, because whether anything happens or not, at least I am assured of eating something I like ;-)

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:46 am

LOL so before the first date you ask her how much she makes then determine if you two should go dutch or not. LOL

kimmie, glad you are feeling me. In the mirror this morning when looking at myself I knew that you would love my new “kimmie rulez” shirt LOL How are you?

Sexy Cool, everyone has different standards and ideas. I just would not use a coupon on the first date.

And as far as how much you spend on the first date…it’s all relative on your income. When I made $30k I would not spend over 50. When I got into the 70k range I didn’t mind spending $100, when my salary went higher than that she could get what she wanted. Because I was comfortable with it…and I didnt have to rely on a coupon. But yet still had tons in savings.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
10:47 am

@Randyt

Yup always have to ask questions that make her seem interesting and you seem interested.

@Leggs

Im not knocking the Date 3, I just think its to early…I would move it to like date 6 or 7.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
10:47 am

COME
First you say, “people don’t automatically know that you are using a discount when you go there to workout. But a person knows that you are using a coupon on a date cuz they see you pull that badboy out.”

Then you say, “It’s not about being superficial,…”

If you base your actions on whether people know or not, is that not superficial?

Realistic

March 9th, 2011
10:49 am

Expecting someone to pay your bill is the tacky part. You shouldn’t assume that a stranger for the most part is going to pick up your tab. And if you don’t even look at the check or offer that’s even more tacky and along the lines of being a gold digger. First you break a guy by expecting him to pay for everything and then you dump him because he’s broke from paying for your fancy dinners that you probably don’t even finish. You shouldn’t pay for someone else’s stuff until you know the person is actually worth the expense. Not the other way around. If you don’t see a guy again because he doesn’t pay for your food then you’re probably not worth it, illogical and too shallow to see again anyway.

It’s not 1922 when women had no “real” jobs and therefore no money. Women are heads of households now and can pay their own way unless they just want to be that helpless little lady of old. This tradition of “taking care” of the lady by paying her way is antiquated now that women make enough to take care of themselves. It’s one thing to be courteous and open doors and quite another to spend someone elses money. It’s two separate issues so don’t associate the two because I know you’ll try.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
10:49 am

I would much rather a person pull out a coupon and pay cash on a date than have him pull out a credit card that is damn near maxed out and he can only affort to make the minimum payments.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:50 am

Nice spin, DreamsM!

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
10:51 am

I don’t think you need to order the dates. Feel out the woman you’re dating and go with what feels appropriate. Everyone is different.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:53 am

Who would use a credit card and on a first date how would you know that it is near maxed it. Maybe it’s just a debit card. A budget is a budget some folks use credit cards for odd things and not just emergencies to each his own. But you have to pay to play.

I mean you could save money by not flushing the toilet everytime you go to the bathroom you can go shopping and just by off brand groceries. The point I am making is that

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:53 am

Expecting someone to pay your bill is the tacky part. You shouldn’t assume that a stranger for the most part is going to pick up your tab. And if you don’t even look at the check or offer that’s even more tacky and along the lines of being a gold digger. HUH?? Tacky, a gold digger. He*ll, he asked the woman out! And, I was taught that looking at the check is a tacky move. If you’re paying the tab, then you don’t look at it, nor do you ask how much everything came to. But, it is nice for the woman to offer to leave the tip. And, you don’t need to know the amount of the tab to do so.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:53 am

If you’re NOT paying the tab…

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
10:54 am

@ M re: “Im not knocking the Date 3, I just think its to early…I would move it to like date 6 or 7″.

My life is moving so fast most of the time that if waited until 6 or 7, I might have forgotten “what to do”. I tend to hasten things…not smart, but like speed dating, I get the small stuff out of the way early LOL.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:54 am

Bottom line: Spend within your means. No point in acting like you have it when you don’t and you know you can’t keep up with that type of spending habit. Because if a person is around long enough they’ll figure out if you really have it or not. You don’t have to drop $100 on a date to be impressive to someone.

And Kimmie- I totally agree with the second half of your 10:39 post.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:54 am

you just have to be balanced in your spending and live within your means

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
10:56 am

I have to give credit to almost all of the ladies I’ve dated. Almost without exception, they offered to pick up half on the first date. i do appreciate the courtesy of them asking.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
10:56 am

as long as my date enjoyed herself and her meal and my company she should not be concerned with how much I spent or how I payed for it. She just needs to see if I can continually uphold the standard I set

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
10:57 am

Dreams – You know me, I keep it cool & easy, that’s always been my stance. Stressing over money when it comes to dating is always in bad taste to me. There is just a way to do things with finese and that’s what a lot of people, BOTH the men & the women. A man can come off cheap and a woman can come off as a materialistic diva. Neither are attractive.There is no crime in not having a lot of money. It’s all in how you manage it. I’ve seen men with the least means get the nicest women because they had finese and style with it and knew how to work with what they had. Complaining about traditions, customs, whatever, gets you nowhere. Good manners will take you very far.

I am a very generous person. I love making the folks around me happy and comfortable. I’m able to do that, within my means. I share what I have happily – I won’t be able to take it with me when I leave this earth. After a few dates, I offer to at least help out. When we are established, I am a PARTNER and share it whatever way I can. It’s really not hard for me.

Ira

March 9th, 2011
10:58 am

I always pay for dates with a few noticable exceptions:

1st Date = Dutch (you’d better be prepared ladies) if you don’t measure up to advance billing – meaning you are too ghetto, chew with your mouth open, text, talk down to me, use the word ax for ask, or are caught in a lie. I’ll go to the men’s room, pay the waiter my half + tip and leave you there.

2nd Date + = Dutch if we are in an exclusive relationship or she commits any of the first date no-nos. The only real difference is that I’ll let you know you’re paying if we’re past the first date.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
10:59 am

DM-me not liking the fact that a guy wants to use a coupon for a first date is not being superficial. Again, I’m not opposed to using a coupon just not on the first date. I just don’t get a good vibe from it. It just comes off as tacky to me. Yeah yeah yeah it shows that you are good with your money…whatever. I just don’t like it. But like I said, to each his own. Find someone like-minded.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
10:59 am

There really is no right or wrong to any of it. Pretty much like CON said – find someone who thinks like you think and sees things the way you do and you’ll be fine.

There are coupon loving chicks out there like me and Leggs.
There are men that wouldn’t dare let a woman pay for chicks like CON.
There are chicks that don’t mind paying for guys like Dan.
There are some Broke-O’s fronting, leading with the wallet for puddy.
There are some lame ass chicks out there dating for dinner.

The list goes on. Find what works for you and work it.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
10:59 am

Do we really have to put limits on how much you should spend on a date. You spend what’s appropriate for the person, the activity, and your financial means. There are tons of things that be done for little to no money, and there’s other things that just can’t ever be done cheaply. In the end the spending doesn’t even matter. Be genuinely interested in your date, and capture her interest as well. If she TRULY likes you, alot of things that would matter with the lamo dude won’t even apply to you.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
10:59 am

Love you, kimmie! You’re a lot like myself (except I’m not engaged). :lol:

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
11:00 am

@ M… In all seriousness, the reason I do such a prescribed way of dating is that I want to see a lady in multiple environments..how she act, how she communicates, is she still interesting or just eye candy or an arm ornament.

It is just something that works for me.

Realistic

March 9th, 2011
11:00 am

And saying someone isn’t a “real man” because he doesn’t pay your bill is further proof of being shallow and a gold digger. Do you not understand this statement just says that you equate manhood with salary?

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
11:01 am

Wise – as to a question in your original post – anything can be done with the right person and circumstances.

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
11:02 am

@SC

“…paying for Dan.” – You know I stopped stripping a while ago.

Ain’t nobody paid for me since.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:02 am

@Ira ~ I realize this may be something you do, but you should know or sense some of this before you even ask the woman out on a date. Ok, you may not have seen her chew, but come on! And, how many women you asked out for a second date said YES?

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
11:02 am

Ira, wouldn’t you know all of that before you asked her out on a first date?

I would love to see a dude with a coupon and it ends up being expired…does he have the money or does he ask his date to help cover. Also I see most agree on the no dutch thing, because even with coupon man…he is still the one with it and expecting to handle the bill. LOL or would you ladies find out where you were going to at and bring a coupon for your half of the meal…is that dutch?

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
11:03 am

@SC

Now, if you meant investing her funds in a nice time, with a nice guy, then yeah, I feel a woman should (at least offer to) pay. It’s an investment with a great return.

What’s wrong with that?

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
11:06 am

Dreams – You know me, I keep it cool & easy, that’s always been my stance.
kimmie I know. That’s why you’re off the market. ;-)

But like I said, to each his own. Find someone like-minded.
COME We agree !00% on this. lol Not sure how long you’ve been reading, but if you’ve been on here a while then you’ve probably heard my whole discourse about pitching your product to people in the market for what you’re selling. I believe in targeted marketing. lol

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:07 am

“…just eye candy or an arm ornament.” Is there a big difference????

2CPTG - wakin' up from a long nap!

March 9th, 2011
11:08 am

cool, still talkin bout goin Dutch…….

Shiiiiid, impress me, you treat on the first date!

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:09 am

@Dan ~ I thought something along those lines. :lol:

@SexyC ~ nothing but NET!

MC Hammock

March 9th, 2011
11:10 am

If the worst worry I have is whether or not to go DUTCH, then I’m having a dayum good day. Bottom line, NO dutch dates on the first one. If it is, than HE is telling you “We’re best as just friends.” so don’t expect anything to come of it. If you go all out on the first date, guess what….you’ve just set the Bar. Anything less for any length of time and it’s “Well, you’ve changed” or “What’s wrong?” I agree that a date is for the man to impress the woman and woo her. But then again, I have been asked out by women recently and it was a great time. I offered to pay, but she insisted. The times are a-changin, whether you think highly of the change or not. Nowadays, you can go to a club and just hang out. Women will buy you drinks and ask you to dance. It’s certainly not the norm, but it happens. Last month I was at a bar and a lady asked me to come join their group (I had never met this woman before). We partied and everyone danced with everyone. As the evening ended, she hnaded me her card and said if I ever wanted to hang out to call her. I have asked her out and payed for the dates every since. But today, either gender can initiate the action, the date, the _____ and it’s quite alright. I’m good with that, but lean towards my old world rules of dating.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:10 am

@PR ~ I would like to think the man using the coupon has some smarts about himself and would check the expiration date before asking the woman out to dinner!

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
11:11 am

@ Leggs

uuhhhh, guess not, LOL

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
11:11 am

Dan – I just meant that there are ladies who don’t mind when you ask that they pay their own way on a first date.

And just for the record, I am always prepared to pay my own way, regardless of whether I expect to do so or not.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:12 am

Exactly MC Hammock ~ dutch on the first date is not a date…two people blooming into a friendship.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:12 am

:lol: :lol: thanks RandyT.

Msg

March 9th, 2011
11:13 am

Those of you that know Raqi’s and can access her spot please read.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
11:13 am

Leggs, in a perfect world. LOL

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
11:14 am

As for coup’n usage – I shole do.

(When I dated) – Never had a 1st date that didn’t tell “I’m trying to retire at 50.” I can’t do that if I’m paying for some “chi-chi” restaurant to impress her on a first date.

For that matter, I resented the idea that the woman was the only person on the date needing to be impressed.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
11:14 am

“And saying someone isn’t a “real man” because he doesn’t pay your bill is further proof of being shallow and a gold digger. Do you not understand this statement just says that you equate manhood with salary?”

Realistic-You sound really bitter today. I don’t know what kind of women you’ve dated but they must have done a number on you. Everyone is different. What works for me may not work for the next person. Some people are old-school like myself and think it chivalrous for a man to pay for a date. And there are others who think everyone should pay their own way. But for me, If I’m out with you on a first date and the bill comes and you want me to pay my tab, I will pay for it because I’m always prepared, but there will NOT be a second date.

But maybe you’ve dated chicks that expected you to take them to 5 star restaurants for every date. Then yes, those women may be superficial. Sorry for ya. But not all women are like that. I don’t care how much you spend on the date. But don’t assume that someone like me who expects the man to pay for the date also expects him to go for broke on the date either. That ain’t me.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
11:15 am

How do you even say that you want to take a woman out or meet up with her but then say that she needs to pay her own way. I am not trying to be funny just asking how do you do that or say that?

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
11:16 am

re: “Nowadays, you can go to a club and just hang out. Women will buy you drinks and ask you to dance. It’s certainly not the norm, but it happens”.

Dress well at Johnny’s Hideaway, and you can drink free all night on the ladies, (or if you just want free drinks, go to bars in Midtown and you might have some guy wanting to dance and buy you drinks all evening, so be careful of the venue unless you play for both teams, LOL).

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
11:16 am

“But like I said, to each his own. Find someone like-minded.
COME We agree !00% on this. lol Not sure how long you’ve been reading, but if you’ve been on here a while then you’ve probably heard my whole discourse about pitching your product to people in the market for what you’re selling. I believe in targeted marketing. lol”

DM–we FINALLY agree!! ;-)

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:16 am

@PR ~ best believe there will not be a second date if we’re out and coupon expired and he didn’ have the sense to check beforehand.

MC Hammock

March 9th, 2011
11:17 am

Dan does have a seriously strong point. It’s not just the woman that needs to be impressed or the man that needs to be impressive.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:18 am

@PR ~ I’m with you (11:15).

74 Dawg

March 9th, 2011
11:19 am

so much for gender equality:) hold the door, pay the check, …wear the pants?

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
11:20 am

@Come On

I’d argue with the “real man” distinction period, and based the logic of your 11:14.

To wit: if each man or woman is quantifiably different, how can anyone define a “real man (or woman)”?

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
11:20 am

Dreams – I was out with an aunt and some other family & friends one time at like TGI Fridays or the like. Everyone was paying their way. My aunt kinda snapped that day and started stressing out because her order was like 50 cents more than she thought it should be. I told her to just let it go, I’d give her the 50 cent if she needed it. She said NO and pulled out a calculator and pen and asked for a menu. She listed everything and it’s price on a napkin and started calculating everything she ordered out right there at the table. I was so embarrassed and mad I left the money for my part and got up and went and stood outside until they came out! I told her that was tacky and she went off about how nobody was gonna cheat her! I laugh about it now but I was hot that day! :lol:

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
11:23 am

Purple – Do you have that t-shirt in more than one color? :lol:

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
11:23 am

Dan-I guess it depends on what YOUR definition of a what a “real man or woman is”. Everyone’s is different as evidenced by the debate going on here today.

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
11:23 am

@PR

You simply state it.

Not everyone out here is dating to find/build/have a relationship. Some women/men want a free meal, some women/men are lonely, some women/men are after to the “coo-coo”, some just want company, and some don’t know what they want.

Fact is, after 18, I would hope that people are having these conversations about expectations and desires in dating first with themselves, and then with a potential mate. And the fact is, that not everyone is doing that.

So, yeah, asking a woman to go Dutch ain’t all that strange (given the aforementioned factors).

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
11:25 am

@kimmie ~ no matter how you spell it, WOW!

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
11:26 am

@Come on

Then do you feel it appropriate for you to impose or project your definition of “real” onto someone else? If so, is it appropriate for them to judged by your standard or on a case – by – case basis?

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
11:26 am

When I take a woman out I am looking to be impressed by her conversation, her style, her ettiquette, if she is engaging or not.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
11:29 am

People have different standards of what’s acceptable and what is not. You have to find someone for you.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
11:32 am

Dan–Well, if I’m just stating my opinion and what works for me I don’t think I’m imposing something on someone. A person that is asking me out will be judged by my standards as I will be judged by theirs. I don’t expect it to be any other way. Now, if you don’t meet my standards and vice versa then let’s just KIM.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
11:34 am

“I don’t see nothing wrong”(RKelly) with coupons and they have their place for consumer consumption. I would refrain from using on a first date not to impress but ettiquet would suggest so. Some have said they’ll pay cool but not if I ask you out.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
11:37 am

Please keep Raqi in your prayers.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
11:37 am

DM–we FINALLY agree
COME I knew I could find something. ;-)

Dreams – I was out with an aunt and some other family & friends one time at like TGI Fridays or the like.
kimmie you were at Chili’s, don’t front. I know how much you like Chili’s. lol I feel you aunt on principle, but like I mentioned earlier, some battles ain’t worth the casualties. Is the fifty cents worth people you care about not wanting to go places with you? Probably not. Fifty cents, no big deal. $10, we probably gon’ have to have a conversation. lol

Dan - Simply....Superior

March 9th, 2011
11:40 am

@SC – no doubt

MC Hammock

March 9th, 2011
11:42 am

I think that I’m one of the odd ones and that when I go to a restaurant and if the food isn’t jumping or have mold on it, I’ll eat it. I’ve heard too many stories of cooks spitting in food or sliding it across the floor when it gets sent back or complained about. How’s that steak going with the dirt from my shoes? Thanks for your griping!

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
11:44 am

I don’t see the guy as cheap if he decides to use coupons but there is a presumption that he is. If it’s a lady that don’t mind fine let the coupons roll but it just don’t seem right coming out the gate.

MC Hammock

March 9th, 2011
11:44 am

OK, here we go….no dutching on the first date (unless she’s Dutch, then dutch her all night), men need to be impressive as do the women, no complaining like a banchee at the table and the last “real man” was Clint Eastwood. Does that about cover it?

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
11:44 am

@Randyt

I feel you and if it keeps working for you, keep doing it!

@Ladies

What number date do you decide to pick up the tab on date? 1st date or the 50th date? lol?

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
11:45 am

MC-You’d eat moldy food? YUCK. If my food has mold on it I’m sending it back but in the nicest way possible because I know that if you come at your server the wrong way you’ll be eating a plate full of saliva and dirt from the kitchen floor.

MC Hammock

March 9th, 2011
11:46 am

PS. Ity’s just me, but no coupons on the first date, at least. 80% of women will look on that as not being frugal, but cheap. She’ll think “Oh, I can’t WAIT to go to the grocery store with him.” Just my point of view from experience….

MC Hammock

March 9th, 2011
11:48 am

COME ON, I said that the only reason I WOULDN’T eat it was if it was jumping when I forked it or if it had mold on it. I guess a frozen middle might cause me to look cock-eyed at it, too….

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
11:50 am

M.–Well as everyone knows, in my case it def won’t be on the first date, LOL. I don’t put a number on it. I go with the flow and how I’m feeling. If a man is expecting me to pick up the tab on the 5th date he’ll probably be in for a rude awakening. But for argument sake, I wouldn’t wait til the 50th date. But if we’re going out like 2 to 3 times a week I’d probably spring for the tab quicker than if we’re only going out once a week.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
11:53 am

MC-Oh, I didn’t read your comment correctly. I feel you. I’m not picky and won’t send my food back for certain things but I’m not eating anything that’s raw or burnt.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
12:05 pm

Ladies what if a guy took you to a restaurant he had coupons for and at the end of the dinner he said I need to go get my coupons out the car…….LOL
Leaves you at the table to go get them to find out they’re expired when he gets back……..LOL
What is your impression?

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
12:06 pm

@COME ON NOW

LOL so if you guys are going out 2-3 times a week, youre quicker to pay than once a week, why is that?

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
12:13 pm

M.Dot – there is really no number. If there is somewhere that I want to go and I want buddy to go with me and I ASK HIM then it doesn’t matter if it’s the 2nd date or the 213th date.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
12:14 pm

M.-I have no idea why that makes sense to me but it does. LOL. I think in my mind I would feel like, “Geez. We’ve been going out 2-3 times a week and he’s always paying. Let me take him out for once.” I guess because maybe he’s spending more money in a shorter period of time than if we were only going out once a week. But again, I really don’t sit there and count how many dates we’ve had before I decide to spring for the tab. It just depends on how I’m feeling.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
12:23 pm

@Come On Now

I feel you I was just curious.

@SC

I feel you.

@Guys

What if you are going out with a woman who has the resources to date and you ALWAYS pay for the dates? How would you address it (if you would address it) or would you just see that you are sponsoring her and charge her to the game and cut her loose?

@Ladies

How would you handle this conversation if a guy came at you with this being an issue?

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
12:31 pm

M.–well if she’s the type of woman who thinks a man should pay for EVERY date, regardless of whether she has the resources or not, then that conversation is not going to go well. If the guy is always paying for the date and feels that he has to say something to the chick about how he doesn’t think he should have to, then he’s probably not with a like-minded woman.

I do occasionally pay for dates but if a guys comes to me and says i SHOULD be paying for more because “i got it” then we wouldn’t be going out anymore. To me, that’s tacky. It seems like you’re going tit for tat at that point.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
12:42 pm

M.Dot – TheDude and I did have this conversation rather early on. He asked me how I felt about paying for dates. I told him that if I invited him out, then it was my treat.

I asked him why he brought it up. He stated that he’d had a few experiences where he ended up feeling like his money was being asked out and that he was interested in knowing how I felt about it.

I just make it a practice of paying for what I want to do – whether it be dinner, a movie, a concert, a trip…whatever. If it was my idea, it’s my treat. However, I will not turn down an offer on his part to pay.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
12:44 pm

RIP Biggie. (14 years)

Fion

March 9th, 2011
12:48 pm

One thing I’ll say is this, “ Baaaaaaby”, if I really have MONEY the last thing I want you to know is how much of it I have too early in the dating process.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
12:52 pm

Have we discussed The Game and its storyline this season?

AmazonRed™

March 9th, 2011
1:03 pm

Afternoon all – Looks like we’ve got a hot topic. Don’t know if we’re still on it.

Uh…the only way to get out of paying on a first date is not making it a date. If you’re fine with being in the friend zone and just “hanging” we’ll go dutch. If you want dating priviledges you better be prepared to treat it like a date!

If I had to choose between dutch or no date. I’ll chose no date and the dude and I can just be friends.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
1:04 pm

Fion – good point.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
1:06 pm

@SexyC ~ I’ve been praying since I haven’t heard from her.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
1:08 pm

ARed – your post reminded me of another point I meant to make.

If we’re both at the table pulling out our wallets to *split* the check, it definitely means we’re just friends and friends only and I don’t mean the new definition of friend either.

AmazonRed™ - I

March 9th, 2011
1:08 pm

And guys if you take a woman out and she insists on paying for her part of the tab that is a sign of things to come. Either she doesn’t like you and does not want to send the impression that she does or you have a woman who is overly independent and “don’t need a man to do nothing for her”

So true. There are first dates where I have insisted on paying my tab because during the date I realized I never wanted to go out with this person again!

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
1:09 pm

@Come on Now

I see what you are saying. When I said they got it, I mean like you know they can handle dating if they wanted to they just didnt.

@SC

I understand that. One average how many times to women ask guys out? Not a whole lot in the beginning…

I was dating a woman who was cool but she would be pressing the issue about going out and never took care of any dates. So its about the level you two are on…

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:10 pm

Missed last nite’s episode of The Game. can anyone give a brief synopsis of what happened?

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

March 9th, 2011
1:12 pm

Afternoon, folks…

On Topic: I’m an old-fashioned southern gentleman (don’t laugh) — so, I was taught that the man always pays. Period. Just part of the cost of dating…

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:13 pm

Ugh…I can’t believe folks are still watching The Game. I gave up after episode #2! (and I was a HUGE fan)

For Real

March 9th, 2011
1:16 pm

What up blog fam.

Dutch is not a date period.

Ladies if you ask a man out then be ready to pay for the date. Common courtesy…..

To coupon or not to coupon, if that’s who you are then I say do you all day and if that’s a turn off for the other person look at it as blessing.

Ladies (and I’m sure a blog dude has said this already) if you want a TRADITIONAL MAN then you have to be a TRADITIONAL WOMAN!!! You are wrong to expect traditional behavior from a man with 21st century attitude.

Fellas being a man is a 24/7 position. Play your position all the time.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:17 pm

Now as I get older, the whole man paying thing has definitely gotten better and not worse. I guess as we get older we have more disposable income or there have been enough chicks giving the *side eye* to cheapos so the do better.

One thing that really impressed me was not only did he pay for everything but he made it a point to show up to the event before me so he could also pay for my parking! (cuz a sista would have drove around til I found a spot on the street :lol: )

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
1:17 pm

Melanie let her parents think she is pregnant because they were giving Derwin too much attention. (I totally detest her character with this new season. She’s just not likeable anymore.)

Brittany stole the weed out of Tasha’s purse so Jason quit the tv show. (They could have at least found an actress who actually looks kinda mixed.)

I don’t remember much about what Malik had going on last night.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:17 pm

ARED- I have to agree that I am very disappointed with this season. Things are just off. I don’t know if it’s because of the break they had but I don’t really like any of the storylines at all. It’s missing that same chemistry. I’m trying to stick in there but I don’t know how much more I can take…

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
1:19 pm

ARed – I blame it on my fascination with watching trainwrecks.

However, that trainwreck fascination ends with Carlos Estevez. That dude is crying out for an intervention.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:19 pm

FOR REAL–You are speaking the truth

Fion

March 9th, 2011
1:20 pm

For whatever it’s worth, on paying with coupons(gift cards) the restaurant business is extremely competitive today.
I pay with and have received coupons (gift cards) from The Palm, Agave, Maggianos you name it.
Bottom line, they are looking for customers and want you to come in.
If giving you 30%- 40% off (incentive) to come in and eat, they’ll do it.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:20 pm

I don’t know if it’s because of the break they had but I don’t really like any of the storylines at all

It’s because it moved to BET and the writers went ghetto. The end.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:21 pm

SC-Thanks. Yeah, that episode doesn’t sound like it was hitting on anything. And I agree, I don’t like Melanie’s character this season either, nor do I like the fact that they can’t find a mixed chick to play the part of Brittany. I’m just not feeling the season at all so far.

Fion

March 9th, 2011
1:21 pm

…….and oh yeah, just for the record on the first date thing. For me it’s so much about me trying to impress you as it is you showing differentiation from Mary, Susan and Eleanor .

Fion

March 9th, 2011
1:22 pm

Meant it’s not so much

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:23 pm

“It’s because it moved to BET and the writers went ghetto. The end.”

ARED-You’ve summed that up really nicely :-)

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:23 pm

Please keep Raqi in your prayers.

Done… just saw the update…

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
1:24 pm

@ARed ~ I gave up watching The Game after the season opener!

@SexyC ~ I knew she wouldn’t tell about the pregnancy. Shameful that they’re evening putting that plot into the story. Ghetto move at best!

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
1:25 pm

Oh…and Tasha gave her stylist a big ass wad of cash for coming to her house and weaving a hairstyle that ended up looking like a $35 wig from the ChingChang Beauty Supply on Metropolitan.

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
1:25 pm

That show has just gotten straight ghetto. To say things are off is putting it mildly. I can’t stand Medschool or Tasha anymore. And Derwin is a lying wuss!

I catch the reruns when I have absolutely nothing else to watch.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
1:27 pm

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
1:28 pm

ChingChang Beauty Supply on Metropolitan.

:lol:

Fion

March 9th, 2011
1:29 pm

Well, kimmie exacly how do you really feel. :)

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:29 pm

I hate what The Game has become so much I don’t even want to talk about it anymore. :lol: Let me continue to play catch up and get back on topic.

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:30 pm

What’s so interesting is when the cast was on MoNique right before the season started Tia said that she loves Melanie the most this year out of any of the other years. I haven’t seen anything so far that has me liking her AT ALL this season….or any of them for that matter. And having Tasha’s love interest to be Terrence J—ugh. Watching his little bird chest trying to look sexy in a towel just did it for me.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:32 pm

I was asked out once to the movies to meet this guy and when I got there, he had already paid for his ticket and was inside the theater, “saving me a seat”.

He would have saved it the whole movie. I would have gotten in my car and went home, or went to see another show. :lol:

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
1:32 pm

Goodness…bird chest….in a towel! :shock: :lol: :shock: :lol:

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
1:33 pm

Definitely with you, ARed! I would not have joined him.

For Real

March 9th, 2011
1:34 pm

“It’s because it moved to BET and the writers went ghetto. The end.” – Or perhaps the network was right, the show had reached its end because there was nothing more the show could do.

Oh Ared you cheap to death for not wanting to pay for parking. I hope your dress masked your cheapscapness.

Speaking of dresses, ladies lookie here I like to see women appropriate fitted dresses. Please stop with the supa dupa tight ish. I mean if I tell you have Inflammatory Bile Disease then your ish is too tight.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
1:34 pm

LOL!

It USED to have a least some positive depictions of relationships and personalities. Now, all of them are spastic and out of control. There is no voice of reason.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:34 pm

A picnic at Stone Mtn and the laser show…cheap.

I had a nice first kiss during the laser show there!

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:36 pm

Oh Ared you cheap to death for not wanting to pay for parking. I hope your dress masked your cheapscapness.

I can be rather thrifty but I think parking is the biggest racket out there. It shouldn’t cost me $20 to park in an empty lot.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:38 pm

Or perhaps the network was right, the show had reached its end because there was nothing more the show could do.

There are plenty of storylines you can give to a newlywed couple, a newly divorced couple and a football superstar that isn’t straight garbage. We’re talking season 4, not 20.

Fion

March 9th, 2011
1:40 pm

@ For Real a.k.a. (Dr. Bushkin)

Inflammatory Bile Disease, question Doc. Can you be up walkin’ round with that!

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
1:41 pm

@AmazonRed

LOL that is funny my friend from hs used to talk about that….

My coworker told me a cheap date story and I had to share…

She got 2 free movie passes and invites this new guy out…they arrive at the movie and she asks if he wants some refreshments….He says “Them (yes them) refreshments are way to high…I am not paying for that”…Then they get into the theatre and she has a dry throat and asks if he would mind going to get some water….”He comes back with a cup of tap water!” Then the movie is over and he says, do you want to get something to eat? I know just the place, follow me…They pull up to McDonalds LOL!!!!! Lets just say she told him no thanks and left him in line at the drive thru!!!

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:43 pm

M. dot…please tell me you are lying. :lol:

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:43 pm

“There are plenty of storylines you can give to a newlywed couple, a newly divorced couple and a football superstar that isn’t straight garbage. We’re talking season 4, not 20″

ARED-I agree. They tried to change up everything when what they had originally worked just fine. I hate when shows try to jump ahead 2 or 5 years. I’m going to stop short of calling this season garbage but that “loving feeling” I once had for it is gone.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
1:45 pm

Y’all still on the game haven’t seen it knows nothing about it.
Hall pass on the game forum.

For Real shooting from the hip as always.

For Real

March 9th, 2011
1:46 pm

“Inflammatory Bile Disease, question Doc. Can you be up walkin’ round with that!” – You sure can it comes off as a sexy walk but the chick experiences extreme rectal pain.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
1:46 pm

It’s garbage. Tell me one storyline that’s headed in a positive direction?

Fion

March 9th, 2011
1:49 pm

@For Real
You killin me Man. Stop.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 9th, 2011
1:49 pm

@Amazon

I wish..lol its some crazy people in the dating world that are messed up..thats just their lot in life!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
1:50 pm

Are we still talking about Dutch Ovens?

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
1:52 pm

Sexy walk with rectal pain…….LOL
WTH that looks like…..LOL

COME ON NOW

March 9th, 2011
1:53 pm

“It’s garbage. Tell me one storyline that’s headed in a positive direction?”

ARED-There isn’t one :-(

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
1:54 pm

“…a sexy walk but the chick experiences extreme rectal pain.” Don’t know anyone who can pull that off!!!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
1:56 pm

What exactly is a mixed person supposed to look like? LOL

For Real

March 9th, 2011
1:56 pm

“Sexy walk with rectal pain…. WTH that looks like” – Picture Ared walking with a pebble in her 6″ heeled shoes and Macy’s forgetting to remove the anti-theft tag out her brand new skinny jeans.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
1:57 pm

Purple some of the ladies are talking about the game tv show. For Real got me trying to picture a sexy walking lady with rectal pain……LOL

For Real

March 9th, 2011
1:59 pm

“What exactly is a mixed person supposed to look like?” – Al Green!!!

For Real now starting to feel dizzy from not eating lunch and why does these peanuts big momma gave me have an hint of chocolate favor to them and they kinda soft too.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:00 pm

Blackfoote, a sexy walk with rectal pain. Oddly I bet women have tried to and pull that off before. I have never seen but I am sure it has been attempted. LOL

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
2:01 pm

LOL…….I can see it clearly now.

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
2:02 pm

4 Real – Okay, I’m trying to sit here at my desk and look serious but it is impossible reading your posts!!! :lol:

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:03 pm

And only a man would put a walk like that in the “sexy” category.

For Real

March 9th, 2011
2:03 pm

Don’t know anyone who can pull that off!!! – Apparently Ared has done it before with great success cause she didn’t have to pay for parking.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
2:03 pm

a sexy walk with rectal pain. Oddly I bet women have tried to and pull that off before. I have never seen but I am sure it has been attempted. LOL

PR – Pregnant women often get hemorrhoids. So you might be seeing it now. :lol:

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:04 pm

Blackfoote, I am sure hookers can do it after a john has just left them with their rectum damaged

For Real

March 9th, 2011
2:06 pm

Kimmie: Here catch this baby while I slap the ish out of Leggs.

“And only a man would put a walk like that in the “sexy” category” – The day J-Z became a sex symbol was the last day a chick can use “only a man would”.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:07 pm

Amazon, no she doesnt have hemorrhoids. LOL

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:08 pm

I sure hope my lunch stays down with all this gut wrenching laughing I’m doing. You are a sick man, 4Real!

For Real

March 9th, 2011
2:09 pm

Purp: Good call on the hookers and I’m sorry about you having hemorrhoid duty.

Mrs. Purp: Purp!!!! It’s starting to itch again!!!!!

Purp: Coming dear!!!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:10 pm

For Real, women think Old Camel Joe is a sex symbol? Probably because he doesn’t use coupons
http://cheezburger.com/View/1798151936

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:10 pm

@ForReal ~ You have a point w/the JayZ comment! Money made Big Poppa (Biggie Smalls, not Kim on the HOA’s Big Poppa) even sexier!

kimmie

March 9th, 2011
2:12 pm

4 Real – Since when did Joe Camel be considered sexy? The only thing sexy about him is his money!

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
2:12 pm

LOL……..it’s a damaged rectum
Got to keep my composure I can’t let my co-workers know what I’m reading gotta take a break.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:13 pm

I am going to push Amazon down for starting a hemorrhoids conversation about my wife. LOL

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
2:13 pm

For Real, there are no hemorrhoids…my tongue still glides smoothly…no speed bumps at all. LOL

You like her rectum? TMI

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
2:13 pm

I meant “lick” her rectum?

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:15 pm

Well, I guess that applies to both Big Poppas now that I think about it.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:15 pm

Amazon do you really want me to answer that? LOL

For Real

March 9th, 2011
2:15 pm

Leggs: If you can give me an explanation for what chicks do to Flavor Flav, I got a good hemorrhoid man that can smooth out your bumps with his tongue. I know but he swears he can.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:16 pm

:lol: :lol: {cough, cough}. ARed, please stop! I can’t continue laughing like this at my desk!

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
2:17 pm

Big Poppa was sexy? Really? I didn’t get that memo.

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
2:18 pm

Wow…gone for a couple of hours and go straight to the end to find “rectum licking”. I guess I had better go back and see how this developed.

Referee

March 9th, 2011
2:18 pm

Rectums are acceptable!

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
2:19 pm

PR – You already did answer it. Assuming you know where hemorroids grow.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:19 pm

@ForReal ~ I’m in no mood to suffer a brain aneurysm, therefore, I cannot answer your queston regarding Flava Flav.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:20 pm

I’m saying his money made him sexy.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:21 pm

Oh goodness, we now have a Referee officiating what’s acceptable and what’s not. We’ve reached a new high, or a new low depending on how you lick it.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:22 pm

Dam@mit! How you look at it….how you look at it. Perhaps I am suffering from an aneurysm.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

March 9th, 2011
2:25 pm

We know what Leggs is thinking about… :lol:

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
2:26 pm

I thought walking away for a minute would help but then Swiss comes along and send me back out…….LOL

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:26 pm

Thanks Ref!

LOL@For Real

Amazon you started the hemorroids conversation.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:27 pm

Leggs, you typed lick on purpose. LOL

Randyt that guy had to know it was not her tongue.

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
2:29 pm

Naw…the rectal discomfort discussion was started by For Real!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:32 pm

Yes true but you brought up the speed bumps. LOL

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:32 pm

@PR ~ no, I didn’t, but was thinking it!

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
2:36 pm

Ared started the rectal discussion when she stated that’s how she got ole boy to pay for her parking.

You wish! :P

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
2:37 pm

Leggs – there ain’t that much money in all the world….for me. (lol)

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
2:37 pm

Not totally timely, but an expression by a country philopher I knew went something like this…

“Show me a man who won’t go down on his wife, and I’ll show you a woman I can HAVE”!!!.

Somehow this conversation seems to be pointed that way.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:38 pm

For Real !!!!! LOL yep that’s what I read too

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:39 pm

randyt, that is true and you might as well flip her over or slide a few more inches south while you are down there.

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
2:39 pm

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
2:41 pm

PR …as the man said, “I ain’t admitting nuttin”.

For Real

March 9th, 2011
2:41 pm

“Show me a man who won’t go down on his wife, and I’ll show you a woman I can HAVE”!!!.” – Or Show me a man that can’t tell the difference between a tongue and a fanga, and I’ll show you a man on vacation in Europe.

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
2:42 pm

Was that Amsterdam?

Fion

March 9th, 2011
2:45 pm

@ For Real
“Show me a man who won’t go down on his wife, and I’ll show you a woman I can HAVE”!!!.”

Like they say, 90,000 Frenchman can’t be wrong!

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
2:48 pm

Randyt on vacation in Europe going south on somebody’s wife…….LOL
Where have y’all gone with this damaged rectum thing……LOL

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
2:48 pm

@SexyC ~ not thinking of it being done to me (which it has been), but was just thinking of the act itself and what makes a man want to go there. I was stunned and surprised, but didn’t stop him (LOL). Just being honest.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:49 pm

You all are crazy, LOL For Real and Randyt have me trying to contain my laughs

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:50 pm

Leggs, he just wants to please you. No holds barred. There is nothing wrong with a little booty licking, especially when it’s reciprocated

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
2:51 pm

Ladies, you haven’t really c#m until you’ve had your c!it sucked, your g-spot rubbed and your booty fangered all at the same time…

As a man, you’d never know for sure. But I’ll take your word for it I guess.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:52 pm

For Real, LOL

Fion

March 9th, 2011
2:54 pm

For Real on that Cholly Sheen!

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

March 9th, 2011
2:54 pm

“As a man, you’d never know for sure. But I’ll take your word for it I guess.”

ARed:lol: True… I’m basing that solely on the PSI of the thigh-clamps that get put on my skull… :lol:

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
2:56 pm

Swiss I am sure you have this tshirt. Blackfoote try these

http://thevinylvillage.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/shocker_tshirt.jpg

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

March 9th, 2011
2:57 pm

“Somebody has an extra phalange!”

For Real — 2 words: Opposable thumbs. :lol: Evolution at its best… :lol:

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
2:59 pm

Purple I like that show stopper looks like it will get the job done well……LOL

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

March 9th, 2011
2:59 pm

:lol: @ Purple — Yeah, I’ve seen that — but it’s never not funny…. :lol:

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
3:02 pm

Blackfoote, you are aiming for the fence…the show stopper is 3 fingers in the stink and one in the pink. LOL

AmazonRed™ - I love LA (LAKERS)

March 9th, 2011
3:02 pm

I’m basing that solely on the PSI of the thigh-clamps that get put on my skull…

:lol: the visual :lol:

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
3:04 pm

Ladies do have some strong thighs.

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
3:07 pm

LOL…….@Purple

Strong thighs they do have can actually break a mans neck if they wanted to.

SlimNumeroUno

March 9th, 2011
3:08 pm

‘“Ladies, you haven’t really c#m until you’ve had your c!it sucked, your g-spot rubbed and your booty fangered all at the same time” – Somebody has an extra phalange!’

For Real – I have a migraine coming on but lawd knows after reading this, the laugh I just had was worth the pain. :lol:

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:14 pm

“Blackfoote, you are aiming for the fence…the show stopper is 3 fingers in the stink and one in the pink. LOL”

DAMN, PR, you are crazy!!

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
3:15 pm

Leggs what you got was dude feeling you you didn’t kiss him afterwards did you?……….LOL

Women do it too but they want to kiss when finished I play like I’m sleep until she brushes and use scope……..LOL

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:16 pm

@WD ~ you think it’s time to rein in your children? :lol:

TPain

March 9th, 2011
3:16 pm

I have a dating misadventure:
I have been dating a guy for about six months, we have been getting to know each other fairly well. I did like him. Well yesterday he calls me and tells me he id really wants to be in committed relationship, he proceeds to ask me a bunch of questions (felt like I was on an interview). At first I was like cool, we are having this conversation I like him lets make some serious decisions. Then goes on after the questions, to tell me I am a women he can be in a relationship with. I’m like ooook, then he says “i have an option either you (me) or can go with this other chick”. I was so shocked he really had the nerve to mention his other options, I had to get off the phone with him.
Today he text me (which made him look even lamer), “did I say something wrong yesterday”. I replied, (in a text) I’m glad you felt the need to share with me you have other options, but I’m no longer an option. I hope for the best if you decide to committ to her. Better her than me. Take care!

Men I don’t understand the aroggance.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
3:18 pm

Dang ya’ll done went from how much to spend to diving for the chocolate surprise. lol

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:20 pm

@Blackfoot ~ no kissing afterwards. When we finished, I gave him mouthwash and a brand new toothbrush.

“Women do it too but they want to kiss when finished I play like I’m sleep” Goodness, you fall asleep that fast that after she comes up from there, you’re acting like you’re sleeping. Shameful! :lol:

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
3:23 pm

LOL………@Leggs

SlimNumeroUno

March 9th, 2011
3:25 pm

Going dutch doesn’t alway have to refer to going to dinner. Sometimes you wanna bust one off but don’t really feel like feeling obligated to hook your partner up so there are times going dutch in the bedroom should be ok & encouraged.

(Leggs, sorry….NOw you can call the dogs off lol)

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
3:26 pm

Leggs if she immediatley goes to rinse I’m woke if not I have fallen alseep………LOL

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:27 pm

@RandyT ~ our banned mate says you nearly killed him with that 2.26 HBO special preview.

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
3:27 pm

TPain – and hence you have the reason buddy is single. (lol) wow…

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
3:28 pm

I do have one question, TPain. Was it news to you that he had other *active* options? Or did you think that you were the only person he had been spending time with?

Blackfoote

March 9th, 2011
3:30 pm

LOL…….@Slim1

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:33 pm

@SlimNU ~ I can understand that being the case for women, but doubt men would want to do the dutch thing in the bedroom.

@TPain ~ that definitely was arrogant on his part. It was his delivery that did him in. He could have kept that to himself because it always lowers the “wantability” of him in our eyes. Yeah, I made up a word.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
3:33 pm

Certified Tongue Diver!

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:33 pm

Exactly, was the “active” part bothersome to you?

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
3:38 pm

@ Leggs …tell our banned friend I said hi…or if he is reading this, hey buddy, how are ya?

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:39 pm

He’s definitely reading and loving it (of course, he is)! :lol:

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
3:39 pm

Oh to be in paris right now with business cards saying…

R. Terrell, Oral Gynecologist.

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
3:40 pm

oops, ignore the name…my bad.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:41 pm

SlimNumeroUno

March 9th, 2011
3:42 pm

‘doubt men would want to do the dutch thing in the bedroom.’

Leggs – They may not ADMIT to going dutch but it’s been done. :mrgreen: :lol: Actually, I think it allows you to bond on a different level where you both watch each other while you take care of your own business.

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
3:43 pm

Is this like a “68 1/2″ where she takes care of you and you owe her one?

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:43 pm

Gotcha, SlimNU! Makes sense when you put it that way, because we know they sure like to watch us go Dutch!

SlimNumeroUno

March 9th, 2011
3:44 pm

‘Oral Gynecologist’

Randyt – Not sure if you’re aware but during one of those types of exams, there comes a part where the doc says, “Okay, you’re going to feel a little bit of pressure from my fingers”…so in your case it would be your tongue…gotcha :shock:

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:44 pm

No, she takes care of herself and she owes you one!

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:46 pm

We do know those words by heart, SlimNU!

SexyCool

March 9th, 2011
3:48 pm

The risk in being an oral gynecologist is that sometimes, you don’t know if the patient has a problem until after the exam has begun or….3 to 7 days later.

Randyt (aka "Been There, Done That, Got a Closet Full of T-shirts))

March 9th, 2011
3:49 pm

@ SexyCool …OOOOPPPPS

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

March 9th, 2011
3:51 pm

you both watch each other while you take care of your own business.
Naw sex is not a spectator sport for me. When it comes to this, I’m grass roots…I like to be in the trenches.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
3:52 pm

Like the wording, DreamsM!

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:12 pm

What happened, have we finally derailed?

Jacques Cousteau

March 9th, 2011
4:24 pm

has anyone seen my mask by chance.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

March 9th, 2011
4:25 pm

Leggs — Sorry… Both hands (and my tongue) were otherwise occupied there for a minute… :lol:

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:32 pm

What you need a mask for Mr. Cousteau. You’re a spirit!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
4:35 pm

I bet a Lesbian OBGYN loves her job.

Jacques Cousteau

March 9th, 2011
4:37 pm

“Sacrebleu”.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:37 pm

Same can be said for straignt male OBGYN. What’s the difference?

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:38 pm

Now that I’ve googled that word, what’s wrong? Oh, you can’t find your mask.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

March 9th, 2011
4:40 pm

I don’t know, Purple. For every smoking hot, well-maintained, hygienic cooch an OBGYN sees, he/she probably sees 10 stank ones… :shock:

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:40 pm

After a while, I would surmise both gets tired of looking at it all day every day. Hmmmmmmm??

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
4:43 pm

Leggs, not the same. If it were a gay urologist then it would be the same.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:44 pm

Not sure about that. I know a male OBGYN who said he was tired of looking at it. It just didn’t phase him. When he said that I wondered how he felt about his wife’s at home. I didn’t ask.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
4:45 pm

Jedi mind trick Leggs.

Jacques Cousteau

March 9th, 2011
4:46 pm

You see madame, that is whay i need the mask, for the how you say the “stanks ones”.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:48 pm

Could be, PR, could be…mind over matter.

JCousteau got jokes.

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
4:52 pm

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
4:53 pm

@PR ~ you leave the E.O.D. I can’t think of anything to top this discussion on bootays!

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
4:58 pm

Purple Rain

March 9th, 2011
5:02 pm

Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics.

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
5:04 pm

Ok, that works just fine. Thank you.

Next time, remember the Bylaws state the E.O.D. must be boldface!

Good night, everyone!

Leggs

March 9th, 2011
5:07 pm