Dating dilemma: What if they have a mean streak?
Everyone knows that the first 90 days is the honeymoon phase in dating. You don’t usually meet the “real” person until you’ve seen them in different environments and/or handling a variety of circumstances. What happens when you are seeing someone new and you see their nasty side (read: Not the good kind. The Ms. Jackson, If you’re ‘nasty’ kind)?
Obviously, you don’t want to dump someone for having a normal, human emotion, do you? Would it bother you if someone you were seeing revealed a pretty mean streak? What do you do when you have seen them react to something in a way that doesn’t really sit well with you?
What are you willing to overlook and what classifies as a deal-breaking mean streak?
Have you ever been on a date and the person had a seemingly random outburst of anger or mean behavior?
Happy Monday! I hope you all enjoyed that beautiful weather this weekend!
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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308 comments Add your comment
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
1:37 pm
“Bet you didn’t think of them as being dirty while you were trying to pull them off her WITH YOUR TEETH”.
Leggs, I enhanced your statement. LOL
Dan - Simply....Superior
February 28th, 2011
1:39 pm
@Lurking
So he flew off the handle when you asked about a lady that “joked” about his possible death after being shot?
Thaaaat might p!ss me off a little too….and sometimes leaving well enough alone is a good idea too.
Celisea
February 28th, 2011
1:39 pm
I never place my bras and panties in the dryer. I always let air dry…they keep longer
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
1:42 pm
Mean streaks, I have one. My wife definitely has one. There is a time and place for every emotion. There are about one or two things that will get me raging mad and I don’t care the consequence of my actions. That being said in 98% of situations I am cool hand Luke and it will take a lot for me to be angered or stressed. But if you disrespect my wife, mama or sisters you have to pay. I am here on my horse any questions? LOL
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
1:43 pm
Lurking, I have yet to read where your guy did anything over the top. I could see if he had jumped up, started breaking dishes and windows just because you mentioned the annoying neighbor. But just him snapping back at you for bringing up something that you know irritates him is no reason to run for the hills.
But that’s just me. I guess my tolerance for some things is different than others.
Dan - Simply....Superior
February 28th, 2011
1:45 pm
@Leggs/Raqi
Wasn’t enough blood in my cerebral cortex to care. (lest I use “brain” or “head” and get banned or an email)
Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)
February 28th, 2011
1:45 pm
Interesting conversation. As Red Foxx said many years ago on an album cover, “You’ve got to wash your azz”.
Re the dirty undies…I’m more concerned about the dirty bottom than dirty undies. I find an excuse to “freshen up” when I think something may be about to happen and would expect the same from others…and I’ve been very lucky so far (partly because I am particular).
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
1:45 pm
Only panties with skid marks our discharge are dirty. And in that case you have a whole set of other problems to worry about than those dirty panties. LOL
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
1:46 pm
our= or
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
1:46 pm
Dan, I agree. Lurking seems to be the instigator of the matter yet she feels that he overreacted. Which he may have to an extent but not so much that she should be looking to cut him loose for something she deliberately did.
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
1:48 pm
Dan, exactly. They were dirty when you shoved your hand into them. They were dirty when pulled them off her and tossed them to the floor. Now that they are washed and cleaned you have a problem with them hanging in the bathroom. LOL Not you literally but you know what I am saying.
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
1:50 pm
I find an excuse to “freshen up”
RandyT, just take a shower together. That solves all concerns. LOL
Leggs
February 28th, 2011
1:52 pm
Even better with the enhancement, Raqi V.
Blackfoote
February 28th, 2011
1:52 pm
Purple:
Celisea done went out of control blogging while she hangs her bra and panties up it aint 2038 yet but if she keeps that up she might be gone……LOL
Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)
February 28th, 2011
1:53 pm
One lady that I was seeing was really into flowered, or plaid, or whatever panties, when my taste (for the ladies) is a high cut (is it called fench cut) type in pastels. Lady was always proud of her undies and looking for compliments. I was trying hard to seem appreciative (while thinking, “dayum woman, let me take you to VS and find some that accent those great legs and bottom, not make you look like a sleepover for a bunch of teenieboppers).
Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)
February 28th, 2011
1:54 pm
@ Raqi re: “RandyT, just take a shower together. That solves all concerns. LOL”. Did, do, will again…got a number of those “wet t-shirts”. LOL
Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)
February 28th, 2011
1:56 pm
that’s “french cut” not “fench cut”.
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
1:56 pm
Blackfoote, she should put them in a net bag and lace them in the dryer on air dry or delicates. LOL I am not paying attention to her until 12/31/2037
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
1:58 pm
My wife doesn’t have period panties which used to throw me off, when she used to have periods. But I don’t care what type of panties she wears that booty always looks good to me. LOL
Celisea
February 28th, 2011
1:58 pm
Simmer down Blackfoote…lol Every man on here knows about and shouldn’t be grossed out by the change of underwear or the fact that once off, whether during intimacy or just a change to a clean pair for a new day. It’s all a part of being in the grown up world. Just as common as breathing air.
Lurking
February 28th, 2011
1:58 pm
Raqi & Dan, I didn’t know the whole story behind it, hell I didn’t even know about the comment. I was just joking about the neighbor, he overreacted and I decided it would be best for me to leave…I was headed for the door when he stopped me so he could explain everything. If I could take it back, I would do just that based off of what he told me. I just wish it could’ve been handled differently, that’s all. I really felt bad for him and understood his frustration. I guess I should apologize with some hot, steamy make-up sex…make sure its loud enough for the neighbor to hear!
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
1:58 pm
LOL Leggs. Yep. That’s rubbing their noses in it.
LOL Randyt. Hanes and FOTL sell some cute patterned hi-cuts. But hey a (wo)man likes what they like.
Celisea
February 28th, 2011
1:59 pm
PR – I find it they last longer if they avoid the dryer at all. But yeah, I know about the mesh bag…I like that better for pantyhose and stockings
SexyCool
February 28th, 2011
2:00 pm
Lurking – if he found out you had a side-piece? Do you plan on having a side-piece to have to hide from him?
Also…I was in a situation with an ex where he showed me his temper and that day, I vowed that I’d never be alone with him again when he was angry. Less than two months later, he tried to kill me.
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
2:00 pm
Just as common as breathing air
LOL Celisea. Makes you shake your head at times doesn’t it?
Blackfoote
February 28th, 2011
2:00 pm
LOL……@Purp
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
2:00 pm
Lurking your boyfriend is 35 and the neighbor is 60? Or am I mistaken? If I am not mistaken how old are you and how is a 60 year old your competition?
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
2:03 pm
I guess I should apologize with some hot, steamy make-up
Naw Lurking. You can’t be wishywashy like that. You chose to go so leave. If that got you running for the door what are you going to do when a real matter is laid on the table.
DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"
February 28th, 2011
2:03 pm
We still don’t know the context of Lurking’s conversation. I mean it’s always a plus to keep your cool, but some people know just how to push your buttons. Were you nagging him to talk about it? Maybe he didn’t feel like talking. If I already told you I don’t feel like talking about something, then don’t keep asking me about it.
Blackfoote
February 28th, 2011
2:05 pm
‘he tried to kill me.”
SexyC this is not amusing I hope he’s long in your past.
Celisea
February 28th, 2011
2:06 pm
Raqi – LOL…yep
I don’t think I’ve every had a mean boyfriend or SO with the crazies…oh wait baby’s father being the exception. Gheesh, when I think back over that crap I wanna knock my ownself a time or two. Hey I was young…you live and you learn. Never been one for taking somebody’s crazy though.
SexyCool
February 28th, 2011
2:06 pm
B-foote – that was 13 years ago.
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
2:07 pm
DreamsMat, I agree. It had to be something. Obviously if she had the urge to ask such a question she knew enough about the matter to know it irritated him.
If my husband tells me someone irritates him I am going to ask why. If he chooses not to give me an answer I will not be joking about it. And definitely not not knowing what to base the joke on.
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
2:09 pm
SexyCool, can I ask what he did to you? Was he ex-military?
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
2:10 pm
SexyCool, nevermind. I think I remember you mentioning it on here before.
Wise Diva
February 28th, 2011
2:12 pm
LOL @ Black Magic Woman, exactly! I’m all yeaaa ok, well um ” I’ll holla” *backing away slowly from Dr.Jekyll/Mr. Hyde (as in hide my body in a freezer somewhere)
Simple Man!!!!
February 28th, 2011
2:12 pm
Yo Lurking….If you get to the house right now, He might be getting that hot steamy Make-up sex from that mean old neighbor!!! If you move quick…You might make it there before the head off to catch the early bird special at the Gloden Coral….
Lurking
February 28th, 2011
2:14 pm
Raqi – yes, it had me running until he explained the situation to me. In the past, I would have kept it moving with the explanation, but I ‘m glad I stayed. In the past, I would’ve left his place vowing to never go back after an incident like that. No, he didn’t hit me or break any dishes nor was I nagging him about it. He told me he didn’t want to talk about it, but stated that I gave him a look as if he had something to hide or was trying to put it off due to some fling.
For Real
February 28th, 2011
2:15 pm
Lurking: You are a ish starter. You probably should leave ole boy alone.
Celisea
February 28th, 2011
2:17 pm
Lurking – You sound like someone that’s been here before and just recycled your story.
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
2:18 pm
I agree with For Real
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
2:18 pm
it had me running until he explained the situation to me
Correction baby girl, you still running. That’s why you are on here asking the question. The matter is not resolved in your mind. You and only you know what you need to do.
And honestly it’s hard to get the full picture of what happened to even offer you any advice because now it sounds a little different from how you presented it.
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
2:19 pm
If you keep pushing buttons you will eventually push the right one. Beware of quiet people, they are usually the most dangerous.
Dan - Simply....Superior
February 28th, 2011
2:19 pm
@Lurking
Finally.
You asked a question, you pressed the issue (accusingly), and then the rant that you spoke about? Context matters.
Yeah, you mighta been a little out of pocket just then.
Celisea
February 28th, 2011
2:19 pm
Yep…if you allow a person to talk 3 or 4 pages…the story will take a different turn than initially presented.
Raqi V
February 28th, 2011
2:20 pm
(as in hide my body in a freezer somewhere)
WiseDiva, reading that ^ sent cold chills thru me. Ee.rie.
SexyCool
February 28th, 2011
2:20 pm
So, Lurking, really, it sounds like you were trying to be cute/flirty/silly and o’boy wasn’t feeling that. It also seems as if the fervor in his response offended you/hurt your feelings just a bit.
For Real
February 28th, 2011
2:23 pm
Purp: Yep, I don’t like people like that, loves pushing other folks buttons but then want to act all surprised when he pull “Ike Turner” out.
Blackfoote
February 28th, 2011
2:23 pm
Glad to hear SexyC.
Purple Rain
February 28th, 2011
2:24 pm
Is anyone really this dumb to send 200k to an internet girlfriend?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1361069/Illinois-man-thought-internet-girlfriend-kidnapped-giving-200-000-told-doesnt-exist.html