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Is it love or lust?

It’s officially Valentine’s day and love is in the air. Well, more like in the restaurants, retail stores, and flower shops – but you know what I mean.   The day when love is on the minds of many people – single (who came up with Singles Awareness Day? I mean, really?) and coupled up people.

Last week we talked about the importance of passion in a relationship, especially if you want a long-lasting marriage. I often wonder how passion fuels the lust, that sometimes gets mistaken for love in the beginning.  How do you really know when you are falling in love or lust with someone?

What do you think the difference is between love and lust? Have you felt as if you have been in love and/or lust? Do you think the two “feel” the same or is there a notable difference?

Have you ever thought you were in love, only to discover later that you were mistaking it for lust? What did you do?

Happy Valentine’s Day to everyone!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

388 comments Add your comment

Leggs

February 14th, 2011
3:15 pm

Don’t know about that one…he’s too egotistical. Unless she brings the “fire,” then looks won’t matter to him. He was in control with all those women, looking down on them as though he was God himself. Let him go head to head with a strong, not easily intimidated woman and we shall see who’s wearing the dog collar!

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
3:17 pm

Kimmie, disagree wit ya. Tiger’s next woman will look like the 12, 13, 40 or so before her. Man is not going to settle for some ugly broad, not happening. Too much of a pattern. Men don’t change that much.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

February 14th, 2011
3:24 pm

Tiger needs to just embrace the “man-ho” persona & run with it. I don’t know how many tennis fans there are on here, but anybody remember Marat Safin? He had a rep for being a man-ho & embraced it… Showed up at the Aussie Open one year with his entire player’s box filled with hoochies for the whole tourney. No coach. No family/friends. Just a box full o’ bimbos. Oh, and he won the title that year, too… :lol:

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
3:24 pm

Leggs re: 3:15 “He was in control”… I’m not buying that. Those bimbos knew what they were doing…and a certain “little head” was in control. Kind of like Bill Clinton. Years later he finally answered the “why” question about ML. His answer was simply “Because I could”. With Tiger, those were targets of opportunity, but thhey knew he was married, they knew he had children, they knew if they played their cards right, a big check with lots of zeroes was possible. Nope, I don’t think he was in control for a moment even.

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
3:27 pm

…not in control, but still accountable that is. He should have known better. I really thought he was smarter than that, although for him to cover it so long with so many…that is impressive.

cba

February 14th, 2011
3:27 pm

I guess if you believe in the theory of being a “sex addict”, he didn’t have control.

DreamsMaterialize "Free Me-Lo"

February 14th, 2011
3:30 pm

although for him to cover it so long with so many…that is impressive.
Randy and those are only the ones we know about. I believe there are plenty who have not come forward because they have more to lose than the ones who went public.

I guess if you believe in the theory of being a “sex addict”, he didn’t have control.
cba I don’t even think the “sex addict” thing applied to Tiger. He just had to do that to appease the masses and his corporate sponsors. He had APPEAR to be sorry and helpless.

kimmie

February 14th, 2011
3:36 pm

Randy – Okay, you’re probably right. Stripper it will be. Or she’ll look like one anyway!LOL!!

Da_Man!

February 14th, 2011
3:38 pm

Stop it … Tiger just got tired of punnany “fast-balls” coming his way and wasn’t strong enough to hold off. He did the best he could but what’d you expect??? I believe his wife was a “fast-ball” too. She is just fortunate/unfortunate, however you want to see it.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

February 14th, 2011
3:38 pm

Dreams:lol: That whole “sex addict” BS is totally made up, in everybody’s case, not just Tiger’s… Did you ever see the South Park episode where the CDC discovers that “sex addiction” appears to primarily strike rich & famous men? :lol: “Why would famous men with lots of money want to have sex with lots of different women?” :lol:

cba

February 14th, 2011
3:39 pm

Leggs, it was late last Friday and I read your reply to the troll “Wise Diva”. You were on top of the situation; had me fooled for a minute. For those who didn’t read it, it was about freeing the South African brother.

kimmie

February 14th, 2011
3:40 pm

Cause if it isn’t love
Why do I feel this way
Why does he stay on
My mind?

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
3:42 pm

@ Swiss re: “Why would famous men with lots of money want to have sex with lots of different women?”

As Bill Clinton said, “Because I could”. In the present and future tense plural, “because they can”.

Da_Man!

February 14th, 2011
3:43 pm

Swiss – I don’t know, but I’m somewhat broke & wouldn’t mind having sex with lots of women. I’d have to get a Hall Pass 1st, Then it’s on. Am I a sex addict?

AmazonRed™ - XOXO

February 14th, 2011
3:43 pm

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
3:43 pm

I personally think Tiger was just doing an investigation for a self help book he plans to write. He probably never even climaxed ;-)

Da_Man!

February 14th, 2011
3:44 pm

OOOH … Kimmie with the NE throwback!

SexyCool

February 14th, 2011
3:44 pm

kimmie – I programmed the Bose cd alarm to play Tony Terry’s “With You” to wake TheDude up this morning.

LL411

February 14th, 2011
3:45 pm

Is Tiga smoking?

AmazonRed™ - XOXO

February 14th, 2011
3:45 pm

Purple Rain

February 14th, 2011
3:45 pm

SexyCool, what does “bmc’ing” mean? I googled it and found nothing.

Randyt, I think you should be more worried about dating a woman who is an actress, rather than her adopted kids unless it’s a total deal breaker. LOL

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
3:46 pm

I bet Tiger was there with all those women but used somebody else’s member so he could remain pure.

Celisea (free Me-lo)

February 14th, 2011
3:46 pm

Tiger needs to just embrace the “man-ho” persona & run with it

Yep, because all that running around ain’t planned nor a result of money. Money just funds the habit. He’s still not sorry, just sorry he’s been caught. He had to almost paint a contrite look when he finally decided to offer a public apology and even then that was a strategic move. Saying he was sorry was all about damage control. If I can’t salvage the marriage, at least let me hold on to as many sponsors as I can. I don’t think he’ll change.

Leggs

February 14th, 2011
3:48 pm

@RandyT ~ I’m going to stick with me thinking he was in control. When I use that word I mean he was in control in demeaning them, looking down on them as though they were less than him. I even heard some of the requests the made of a few of them showcased just how low he thought of them. That’s what I meant by “control” (perhaps not the best word to use).

@cba ~ no way that could have been our beloved WD asking about Me.lo!

Fion

February 14th, 2011
3:50 pm

@Celisea (free Me-lo)
” Tiger needs to just embrace the “man-ho” persona & run with it”

Ouch! Celisea Tiga owe you $20 or sumthin! :)

SexyCool

February 14th, 2011
3:51 pm

Bytch-Moan-Complain.

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
3:51 pm

@ Leggs, true, some would say he abused them and used them as sex toys…no question about it. Kind of makes one wonder if one works and lives in a candy shop, does he get tired of the candy and try, like a drug, for something more exotic or a bigger and bigger rush. Charlie Sheen has been trying for years, but all the coke, and all the porn stars in the world can’t seem to fulfil him.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

February 14th, 2011
3:51 pm

I actually feel kinda bad for Tiger… Really, his biggest mistake was getting married in the first place… But I seriously don’t know how many dudes could resist all that temptation. Now, granted, he doesn’t appear to have put up much of a fight… :lol: But I can’t even imagine how hard it would be to fight off all that puddy constantly being thrown at you… It’s tough enough resisting temptation when you’re a regular dude (especially a married dude, for some reason), but add rich and famous to that, and you’ve got to fight the puddy off with a stick (not that stick, either). :lol:

cba

February 14th, 2011
3:52 pm

I think Tiger is really missing his “ole man”. His father was his rock.
I know Celisea, his father had women issues.

Dan - Simply...Superior

February 14th, 2011
3:54 pm

B(rhymes with “witch”), Moan, and Complain

Simple Man!!!!

February 14th, 2011
3:58 pm

Tiger needs to be the next Batchelor….then when about 20 to 25 hoes to throw the coochie at him, he can pass out roses until he finds the freakiest one,Hit her up real good and then do it again next season…. I mean If Ommarosa and Flava Flav and Ray J can make it work for multiple seasons, then why can Tiger????

kimmie

February 14th, 2011
3:59 pm

Swiss – I think adding to the difficulty of turning down all that’s thrown at him was his sheltered life. He was not out “sowing his oats” when other guys his age were. He was completely naive, no street sense at all. I mean who leaves a voicemail “Hey this is Tiger. Delete my number. Wife is suspicious”?

kimmie

February 14th, 2011
3:59 pm

Simple – He would be perfect for that show!LOL!!!

Dan - Simply...Superior

February 14th, 2011
4:00 pm

Tiger = Kobe – rape and snitching

Leggs

February 14th, 2011
4:01 pm

I believe he’s missing his father as well. How many in his circle can he look up to for advice when they’re doing the same dang thing he’s doing, or have turned a blind eye to what he was doing?

kimmie

February 14th, 2011
4:01 pm

SexyCool

February 14th, 2011
4:01 pm

ALLEGED rape….

Purple Rain

February 14th, 2011
4:01 pm

SexyCoool, thank you

Celisea, you sound like Tiger cheated on you or something or that you and Elin were friends. LOL

Purple Rain

February 14th, 2011
4:02 pm

Dan I think Tiger was a better pimp/player than Kobe. Kobe was just weak, Tiger was running them.

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

February 14th, 2011
4:03 pm

kimmie — I agree. All guys need to have that “man-ho” period to get it out of their system (or to at least satisfy the curiosity) before settling down… Otherwise, they’re just one loose coochie away from falling into “sex addiction” :lol:

Da_Man!

February 14th, 2011
4:03 pm

ok – enuf with the Tiger Saga … who’s getting in the “Basket” tonite and & swingin til the hinges fall off?

It is V-Day …

Is that to personal of a question????

Leggs

February 14th, 2011
4:03 pm

@kimmie ~ that was one of the more foolish things he could have done leaving that asinine message. He would have gotten off better sending a carrier pigeon with the msg. to delete.

cba

February 14th, 2011
4:04 pm

Kimmie, that voicemail was so stupid, I just knew it had to be altered. How do you get accepted to Stanford being that stupid?

i'm swiss™ ("FREE ME.LO")

February 14th, 2011
4:05 pm

Simple — They could call it “Hole in One” — I’d watch that show… :lol:

Dan - Simply...Superior

February 14th, 2011
4:07 pm

Alleged my (her) behind.

Dan - Simply...Superior

February 14th, 2011
4:09 pm

@PR

He (Tiger) was worse. He was telling the chicks he “likeded” them, giving them details on his real life and stuff. That’s 4th grade right thurr

Fion

February 14th, 2011
4:10 pm

I could loose my license for this, but you ladies have a point

1st rule the married man’s hand book::
“If you don’t know how to go get some strange STAY HOME.

kimmie

February 14th, 2011
4:11 pm

cba – Tom Joyner did a remix of some song, I forgot what it was, and inserted that voicemail in it. It kept saying “Hey this is Tiger” over and over, all through it. It was hillarious!

Randyt (aka "tired of this coolie work, need to get on a plane somewhere)

February 14th, 2011
4:12 pm

@ cba – may I take a stab at answering your question?

re: “How do you get accepted to Stanford being that stupid?”

It is widely known fact that when men get horny, their IQ drops a minimum of 50% to 70%. I am certain my “126″ has frequently dropped to about “40″ or so when the blood rushes in the wrong direction ;-) I look back constantly at some events in my past and wonder “what the hellz was I thinkin…??? A bunch of them had to do with an impromptu “woody”.

Purple Rain

February 14th, 2011
4:12 pm

Dan, he was just telling them what they wanted to hear. Kobe was al lfake crying and buying big rings and stuff. Tiger just went and built a bigger house. LOL