Are you vetting your dates?
If you have found yourself sitting across the table looking at your date as if he had for heads, you may need to ask yourself an important question, “How did this happen?!” When this thought crosses your mind on a consistent basis, you should definitely reevaluate your “vetting” techniques.
A lot of us have busy schedules and lives. This leaves few precious hours to meet and screen dates, but it’s worth the time and effort to do so! If you already know that you would not get along well with a young, gun-toting, scripture quoting guy, then do NOT agree to take your get the number of your church member’s brother.
I’m not suggesting you rule out people based your unrealistic “ridiculists” of what you want. However, you know yourself well enough to narrow down potential dates using reason and logic.
What do you do to vet potential dates? If the person is a referral, do you find out the basic information that places them in potentially great date category?
If you meet someone from online dating or through a random encounter, do you devote time to talking on the phone first? Do you have an idea of what you would like to know about them before setting up your first meet and greet?
What do you think could happen when you don’t properly screen your dates for compatibility?
I once agreed to go out with a tow truck driver because he was handsome and helpful, needless to say I did not vet him properly. I ended up on a date with a really creepy guy who had my home address and car VIN#. Lesson learned!
What’s the worst dating misadventure you endured because you did not screen your date?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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130 comments Add your comment
Beautiful
January 31st, 2011
1:04 pm
good luck SexyCool!
SexyCool
January 31st, 2011
1:20 pm
Thanks, Ange…
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
1:27 pm
Afternoon all,
A little late today since I just got poked and prodded for my physical today. Seems a little slow in here, I suppose due to the gloominess of the day. Shole wish I had taken off the whole day.
AmazonRed™
January 31st, 2011
1:39 pm
Afternoon Slim.
I’ma need Raqi to check in everyday though… just want to make sure she and the bambino are doing okay…
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
1:50 pm
Ared – Oh ok…is she on best rest or something? Complications? I’ve been feeling a bit dizzy the last week and a half so i’m hoping it’s nothing major. Of course, everyone’s initial thought is always—->are you preggers. I mean, there are many other possibilites out there than that. Sheesh! I maybe be anemic but we’ll see…
AmazonRed™
January 31st, 2011
1:51 pm
@Slim – Yes, she’s on bed rest for the rest of her pregnancy. However, she still has around 5 more months to go.
AmazonRed™
January 31st, 2011
1:52 pm
Oh, and sorry you’ve been feeling dizzy. Funny how my first thought is maybe you have vertigo or your equilibrium is off. Why are folks always trying to give someone a baby? LOL
DreamsMaterialize
January 31st, 2011
2:01 pm
Ok that after-lunch bear is on my back. need to do some push-ups or something. lol
kimmie
January 31st, 2011
2:02 pm
Why are folks always trying to give someone a baby?
Slim/Amred – I know! The first thing came to my mind is vertigo. SO suffers from that from time to time and he’s definitely not pregnant!LOL!
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
2:04 pm
‘Why are folks always trying to give someone a baby?’
Ared – Chile I have no idea…
AmazonRed™
January 31st, 2011
2:07 pm
Group hug Slim and Kimmie. LOL
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:08 pm
What’s the worst dating misadventure you endured because you did not screen your date?
You wanna hear it here it go,
I’m on the 1st date with this chick. Things go well, it’s a normal 1st date.
We leave the restaurant and I’m taking her home. She says “hey’ can we make a stop at my cousin’s. Just need to run in and grab something and go.
“Ok, cool no problem.”
We get there, chick let’s us in and I see another chick sittin on the sofa, but she has this glazed look on her face.
I’m thinking what’s up with ol’ girl, cause it looks like she’s been sittin there for a couple of days.
Cousin come’s out of the back, quick intro,my date and Cuzz go in the back.
5 minutes she walks back in the room and ask me if I’m in a rush “no, I’m good.”
She starts going through her purse, I’m thinking what is she looking for?
Few seconds I got my answer, CRACK PIPE. Wait, it gets better.
She put’s the rock in the pipe and fires it up. 3 – 5 minutes rock is gone. She’s STONED.
Falls back into the couch and she’s out of it. Matter of fact she looks like
ol’ girl sittin on the other sofa. I get up to rollout Cuzz says where you going,
Me: “man I straight vapor’.
Cuzz: Hold up, take her witt you.
Me: You her cousin.
Cuzz: Cousin! @#!%*?&^ I ain’t her cousin, I’m her supplier!
Me: I hope she got cab fare, cause I’m gone slim.
….and ya know to look at that girl you never would’ve thought that she was strung out!
Damn shame too!
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
2:09 pm
kimmie – so what brings on the vertigo whenever SO gets it? I don’t believe i’ve ever had it before.
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
2:13 pm
Fion – Daaaayyyyuuuuum Gina!
Leggs
January 31st, 2011
2:14 pm
That is funny and sad at the same time. You see, she’s jonesing and doesn’t care about first impressions. WOW!
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:15 pm
@Slim
…..and that’s the truth Ruth!
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:16 pm
@Leggs
That’s what i said. She couldn’t take the ride home. She had to hit it right then.
kimmie
January 31st, 2011
2:17 pm
Slim – They say vertigo is due to some inner ear problem. Swimming, traveling like airplanes & cruises or an ear infection can cause it. The dr believe his was due to stress though. He had 1 bout with it during the 3 years we have dated. Before though, he had several bouts along the time his wife was sick and after she passed.
Leggs
January 31st, 2011
2:18 pm
@Fion ~ the date was going so well. She liked you and she got nervous…she needed a hit to get back to the swing of that which she was comfortable with…sitting on the edge of the couch STUCK!
AmazonRed™
January 31st, 2011
2:18 pm
I’m thinking what’s up with ol’ girl, cause it looks like she’s been sittin there for a couple of days.
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:21 pm
@Leggs
I hear ya!
kimmie
January 31st, 2011
2:22 pm
Slim – Ginko biloba works wonders on it. My grandmother and another friend of the family used to get it all the time until they started taking the ginko regularly. Have not had a bout since.
Helped my SO some, but not as dramatically as my grandmama & friend.
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:24 pm
Enter your comments here
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
2:26 pm
kimmie – I’ll keep that in mind. I’m not sure yet what it is, will find out something more concrete once bloodwork comes back…have to go back next week. Ginko is supposed to be good for memory too, so it’ll have dual effects, if not more.
Leggs
January 31st, 2011
2:27 pm
I never understood crack. Perhaps she was wanting to see if she can have a date with a nice person and not let the voices of the drug summon her…oh well, she lost!
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:33 pm
@Leggs
Nah, nah. She was a functional Junkie. Hid it well. Real Pretty, making money the whole 9.
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:37 pm
…….and the crazy thing about that is, i got introduced to her by a male friend of mine
who swore he didn’t know that about her.
Fion
January 31st, 2011
2:37 pm
Ain’t that a head kicker!
kimmie
January 31st, 2011
2:38 pm
Fion – That’s wild. But you would be surprised how many “functionals” are walking among us. Looking perfectly normal, but got a whole ‘nother life going on behind closed doors.
A lot of people look and say “He/She looks so nice, seems to have it together. Wonder why no one has snatched them up. You’d be surprised what people have going on!
Kym
January 31st, 2011
2:38 pm
I am really in need of a break from foolishness today. Why does Monday have to be so Monday?
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
2:39 pm
I have a functional crackhead uncle…he can build a house from the gound up, fix any and everything but he just likes to partake of what he likes to call his ‘wife’. I guess in a sense it is almost like having a significant other…you spend your money on it…you crave it…don’t like to do anything without it, in their mind it soothes their troubled mind, etc.
Leggs
January 31st, 2011
2:40 pm
Oh, a functional crackhead….you mean like Bruno Mars?
Kym
January 31st, 2011
2:40 pm
Wild story Fion!!
Leggs
January 31st, 2011
2:40 pm
I just found out he’s a crackhead!
SexyCool
January 31st, 2011
2:42 pm
Speaking of crackish ways…please tell me why that chick on GMA this morning didn’t want to admit that Charlie Sheen is a crack addict. Talking about he was smoking “chunks of cocaine out of a pipe.”
B!+^#, that ain’t no ol’ regla ass cocaine. That’s crack.
kimmie
January 31st, 2011
2:47 pm
SCool – Somebody called to Q100 about Sheen this morning. Basically she said the same thing, that nobody will go on and say he is on CRACK. That crack has a stigma to it that powder cocaine does not. The powder stuff is more “high class” suppossedly. There is a racial component to it – if Sheen wasn’t swiss, the media would have no trouble pinning the crackhead label on him!
Kym
January 31st, 2011
2:47 pm
Bruno Mars the guy who sings I wanna be a millionare? I thought he was a teenager? Clearly I am not up on the music scene
SlimNumeroUno
January 31st, 2011
2:48 pm
Sexycool – I think that’s pretty much what Whitney Houston did as far as not admitting to smoking crack….I know yall remember her famous phrase, “Crack is Wack!”. Matter of fact, “Show me some receipts from the drug dealer where I purchased crack”
SexyCool
January 31st, 2011
2:50 pm
kimmie – “CHUNKS of cocaine”….chunks, no less.
I have not ever seen a CHUNK of cocaine. (Not that I have ANY cocaine (read recreational drug use) of any sort…ijs….
She said they were the size of tennis balls.
Lord Velonese
January 31st, 2011
2:51 pm
abc wrote: “Vetting dates? Going out with tow truck drivers because they’re cute and they asked? How about just having a lick of common sense, and only go out with people that you really like? Of course, you may have to actually get to know them a little bit before going on any dates with them. That’d require at least a modicum of patience.”
Lol could not agree more, if I dated every woman I thought was good looking or met, I don’t think I would have any sanity left. The only other thing I’d like to add is, if you use a “Dating site” you’re an idiot and probably deserve the follies that come with it. Whats with all this slang anyway, Till I am paid to learn it, I think some people need to go back and take English again.
Leggs
January 31st, 2011
2:51 pm
@Kym ~ he also sings “You are beautiful just the way you are.” He isn’t a teenager.
DreamsMaterialize
January 31st, 2011
2:52 pm
Yeah that “functional” shyyyyt only lasts so long though. Eventually the crack monster catches up with you.
Kym
January 31st, 2011
2:55 pm
Speaking of crack..@kimmie..are you keeping up with the antics in the Chicago mayor’s race? Apparently Carol Moseley Braun accused the other black female candidate for mayor of being a crack addict. Rahmn is gonna win by a landslide..
Sassy Me :-)
January 31st, 2011
2:55 pm
he was smoking “chunks of cocaine out of a pipe.”
That’ll fo sho get you a chile phuleaze…
But ever since Whitney said, “Crack is whack folk been tryna be all bourgeois about it. Gone call a spade a spade…
kimmie
January 31st, 2011
2:56 pm
Apparently Carol Moseley Braun accused the other black female candidate for mayor of being a crack addict.
Kym – Oooo….. No, I didn’t hear about that!! Yeah, Rahm got that.
Kym
January 31st, 2011
2:58 pm
@kimmie..Here’s the link..she was showing her butt. Oh and the debate took place at Trinity..Rev Wright’s church.
http://www.npr.org/blogs/itsallpolitics/2011/01/31/133374209/carol-moseley-braun-attacks-rival-as-past-crack-user
Let the air out
January 31st, 2011
3:00 pm
Till I am paid to learn it, I think some people need to go back and take English again.
Wah wah waaaah. You didn’t ride the short bus to school,did you Rodney Raincloud?
i'm swiss™
January 31st, 2011
3:01 pm
Good thing for ol’ Charlie is at least he still has $$. Hopefully, he’ll either clean up or die before it runs out, ‘cos it would be a d@mn shame for him to show up on a street corner somewhere sucking wang for some crack…
DreamsMaterialize
January 31st, 2011
3:01 pm
Yeah Rahm got that race on lock. Who wouldn’t want a mayor with personal ties to the president?
Sassy Me :-)
January 31st, 2011
3:04 pm
Kim & Kimmie that debate was ummm interesting to say the least. Carol said her opponent had been a crack addict for the last 20 years…left me looking
that she’d say such but nowadays it’s a free for all.