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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Dating: Do we still need the chase?

You can predict how some conversations about love and sex will unfold among a group of men and women. Not unlike the discussions we have on the Misadventures in Atlanta blog, you realize how differently men and women think.

I think that seeing different perspectives can be quite enlightening though! Some of the best revelations I’ve had about men have come from talking to men about men.

I remember a group of us were having dinner to celebrate one of our friend’s birthday. That evening turned into what we called The Great Chase Debate of 2010 because we ended up having a heated debate about chasing and pursuing someone you are interested in. I was surprised to hear the women say men in Atlanta don’t pursue them.

A few of the men admitted that they really don’t “chase” women all that much. One of the guys even said that a lot of women in Atlanta make it super easy for them em> not to chase.

Interestingly enough, the argument got most heated when we debated whether “modern day” dating scene even had a need for pursuing a chase. How often do you see men persistent about getting a woman to go out with them?

Do women still want to play hard to get? Are men interested in chasing and pursuing women?

What do you guys think? Has the way men pursue women changed all that much?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Blog

452 comments Add your comment

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
8:10 am

HAPPY NEW YEAR YALL & WELCOME BACK TO reality.

As far as dating goes, all the game playing, maneuvering etc is exhausting, tiring and getting OLD!! We need to go back to the days of simple dating….do you like me? Check YES or NO Sheesh!

Notrunning

January 3rd, 2011
8:47 am

I don’t chase. My thought is that if someone wants to be with you, they will. No matter how busy a woman is if she is into you she will make time to be together. I, in turn, will do the same. In fact, if a woman is into the chasing thing then I am more likely to not chase.

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
8:49 am

Happy New Year everyone! Hope everyone had a nice holiday!

One of the guys even said that a lot of women in Atlanta make it super easy for them em not to chase.

That sums it all up right there. There are men who chase, but often chicks are so thirsty, there is no need. So when they meet a woman with standards, they forget how to act. Some of em catch a clue before it’s too late though. But it’s definitely not my grandparents generation anymore… he got the girl even when she told him she was engaged to someone else!

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
8:51 am

(Slim now running around streaking with the music blasting over the loudspeaker, drinking leftover champagne from New Years, since apparently she is the only one here)

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
8:55 am

Learn to hit that “refresh” button Slim. You have company. But uh…have you been working out? :lol:

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
8:57 am

(Slim now grabbing a coaster to hide her goodies but the CT is still showing)

umm…errrr….Happy New Year, Ared? :oops: Uh, you mind passing me my shirt o’er yonder, thanks

Sacajawea

January 3rd, 2011
9:00 am

Good Morning!
Unfortunately for many men, it seems as if the Desire is in the Pursuit! It takes a mature and ready heart to be satisfied once the chase is over.

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
9:06 am

:lol: @ Slim. Yeah, I’m not usually blogging this early, but heck, the job gave me this break without hitting my PTO days, so the least I could do was show up on time this morning. :lol:

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
9:11 am

Aww look at cha Ared, trying to get off to a nice start and all. So what did you get into for NYE’s, if you don’t mind me asking?

Simple Man!!!! Refreshed and Ready!

January 3rd, 2011
9:18 am

Happy New year Peeps!!

Hope everyone had a safe and Happy holiday season!

2CPTG©--"that dude from da innanet"

January 3rd, 2011
9:18 am

Morning, Ladies….

2CPTG©--"that dude from da innanet"

January 3rd, 2011
9:18 am

and, Simple Man…

Chelle

January 3rd, 2011
9:20 am

HAPPY NEW YEAR BLOGGERS…I don’t play ‘hard to get’ I just don’t ‘SETTLE’ have a great day bloggers :)

Chelle

January 3rd, 2011
9:22 am

We must remember that some MEN enjoy being ‘chased & pursued’ also

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
9:27 am

‘It takes a mature and ready heart to be satisfied once the chase is over.’

Worth repeating….seems we’re turning into a people who find more joy in chasing the rainbow than working to create and maintain their own.

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
9:38 am

2C – Howdy honey bun…how goes it?

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
9:39 am

:lol: Yeah… at least I made the effort. I’ll start rolling in around 9 next week I’m sure. :oops:

New Years Eve, went to the early service at church then rang the New Year in with a friend. We sat on his deck around the fire pit and had drinks and cigars and a champagne toast at midnight. The weather was perfect.

How bout you?

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
9:43 am

We must remember that some MEN enjoy being ‘chased & pursued’ also

Yuck.

abc

January 3rd, 2011
9:48 am

If a person doesn’t pursue you, it’s because they’re not all that interested. Otherwise, it’s just fun and games, nothing to do with a serious relationship.

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
9:50 am

Ared – ooooh you smoka da cigar eh? Sounds like a pretty cool laid back way to bring in the New Year…peacefully. Um, a friend of mine had tickets to Uptown but decided to hit up church instead. So me and the dude went to that then opted to spend the rest of the eve with a bottle of champagne back at the house. ;-)

Sassy Me...Onward and Upward :-)

January 3rd, 2011
9:50 am

We must remember that some MEN enjoy being ‘chased & pursued’ also

:???:

I’d like to hear what the men folk have to say about this..

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
9:54 am

Slim – I’m not a cigar smoker at all! I told him that, but I also told him I’d at least try it, it was probably my 3rd time. Got a few laughs from my inexperience.

Yeah, I got a last minute ticket to the Sol Fusion party at the JW Marriott but decided to pass. Glad I did. ;)

My whole break was super chilled, laid back and relaxing. I’m glad I decided to stay in town. I got all my NY superstitions out the way, had my greens and black eyed peas and had a man cross my threshold first.

Glad you and the dude had a chill time too. The couple that prays together… ;)

Leggs

January 3rd, 2011
10:01 am

Good morning and HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE.

I will second Chelle’s comment at 9:20.

Went to annual crab boil on New Year’s day and had a blast. Interesting watching the menfolk there focus on one drunk woman. She was cute and sexy, but drunk. They didn’t care! SMDH!

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
10:04 am

Ared – blog monster on it this morning ….dagnabit, I said the Ri di cu lous word…ooops

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
10:06 am

What I had said was….we wanted to see Chris Tucker at the Fox but to pay $95 a ticket plus all the fees just for a comedy show, seemed a bit extreme. Plus someone I know that went, said it was mediocre at best so I’m glad we didn’t waste money on that.

‘The couple that prays together…’ I almost said something else but I think i’ll keep that to myself this time… :oops: :mrgreen: :evil: ;-)

SexyCool

January 3rd, 2011
10:15 am

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:25 am

‘The couple that prays together…’ I almost said something else but I think i’ll keep that to myself this time…

:lol: I can only imagine!!!

BlackMagicWoman

January 3rd, 2011
10:27 am

Happy New Year Folks. I spent my first one in ATL. Now I am back in the Bigg Apple on the grind!

“There are men who chase, but often chicks are so thirsty, there is no need. So when they meet a woman with standards, they forget how to act.”

ARED….I cosign that to the 10th power chica.

Um…I was at Sol Fusion…you should have come! Usually I am in Black. But I decided to bring the new year in a happy color. I was “Pretty in Pink”! :lol: And to hide my knee brace (due to my torn meniscus) I wore these fierce Hoot Pink suede thigh high boots I got from over seas!

Now….Tuesday the new Teen Mom starts. Shall I expect you to kick off our TrainWreck TV panels? :lol: The holidays with the reruns of our shows have halted our disscusions.

BlackMagicWoman

January 3rd, 2011
10:29 am

Oh dayum…I am losing it…I meant to “hot” not Hoot. I’m still detoxing…don’t judge me! :lol:

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:34 am

BMW – Sorry I missed you while you were here. I asked Page what y’all were up to and she just said you were gonna be “at the club” :lol: Yeah, the Sol Fusion ticket would have been free, but then it meant I would have to kiss a random at midnight! :lol:

I will wait for the pics, pink lady!

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
10:34 am

BMW – TrainWreckTV has already sort of started….What Chilli Wants premiered last night…and also on BBall Wives, that chick and her supposed to be hubby had ‘the talk’. He just asks like he really could care less about her or if they stayed married or not. She threatend divorce and he said ok, then she back tracks tombout, well…we can talk about it. :lol: (And not sure if anyone else noticed it, but dude looked like he just got back from a fantabulous vacation lol)

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:35 am

Tuesday the new Teen Mom starts. Shall I expect you to kick off our TrainWreck TV panels?

Oh…and DO YOU REALLY EVEN HAVE TO ASK!!! It’s no coincidence they picked the 4 girls who had the most HOT MESS stories to follow. Girl, you better be there for every episode!!!

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:35 am

Tuesday the new Teen Mom starts. Shall I expect you to kick off our TrainWreck TV panels?

Oh…and DO YOU REALLY EVEN HAVE TO ASK!!! It’s no coincidence they picked the 4 girls who had the most HOT MESS stories to follow. Girl, you better be there for every episode!!!

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:39 am

TrainWreckTV has already sort of started….

As long as Real Housewives is playing…we’ll always have TrainWreck TV!

As my friend said yesterday: “We already know what Chilli wants…she wants Floyd Mayweather, so why is this show even on TV?” :lol:

Basketball Wives…Evelyn needs some anger management! I think Jennifer really wants her marriage to work, but dude is not giving her ANYthing to work with. Them pressing Royce’s dude about “if he made her hips spread yet” was just gross.

Sassy Me...Onward and Upward :-)

January 3rd, 2011
10:43 am

(And not sure if anyone else noticed it, but dude looked like he just got back from a fantabulous vacation lol)

OKAY?! And he ain’t even cute…AT ALL…not even a teeny tiny bit. He looks like he should’ve had an orthodontic intervention some time ago. He doesn’t care if they stay married or not and I don’t know why Jennifer is acting so blind to the obvious.

What Chilli Wants premiered last night…

What does she want?…she may be her own worse enemy when it comes to love…

Leggs

January 3rd, 2011
10:44 am

@ARed ~ Evelyn doesn’t sugar coat one damn thing. However, she needs to lighten up on Suzi. It’s done. Stop harping on it.

@SlimNU ~ JabberJaws wife is emotionally unavailable. In one fell swoop she went from talking about the divorce to “we can take it one day at a time.” He and I both said at the same time, “no need for one day at a time.” They do not have a marriage. It’s just status for her. They’re not even sexing each other! WHAT!!!!! Well, he’s not sexing HER!

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:45 am

OKAY?! And he ain’t even cute…AT ALL…not even a teeny tiny bit. He looks like he should’ve had an orthodontic intervention some time ago

My one friend said it looks like he could bite through a chain linked fence. :lol:

Sassy Me...Onward and Upward :-)

January 3rd, 2011
10:46 am

Them pressing Royce’s dude about “if he made her hips spread yet” was just gross.

Royce isn’t exactly the epitome of tact either…but those chicks wantin to know all of that crossed the line I think.

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
10:47 am

Housewives of ATL must’ve taken a holiday hiatus since a new one didn’t come on last night.

Chilli Soooooo wants Floyd but I think he doesn’t want to necesarily try to keep up with her demands. That’s like accepting a fight of a person who you KNOW will kick your arse. :lol: It was funny how he kept ignoring her serious questions and he knows dayum well what he’s doing. Their situation is sort of in line with the topic…he knows she wants him…she tries to play it cool but even she herself admitted how he can come back with something sweet to “open her back up”. lol She let’s him get away with way more than she does any new dude she attempts to go out with.

Evelyn needs to go somewhere to sit down and i can’t wait to see Tammi and her get into it. Tammi is skrait hood ;-)

Jennifer is in denial….she is always by herself and as long as they’ve existed on that level, he isn’t planning to change…why would he. It’s not like they have kids together. Guess in the world of athletes, that’s where Jen messed up. Should’ve popped out a few by now..heyal it’s been 3yrs! lol

Pressing Royce’s dude about their bedroom activities was TACKY! Who does that?! They all just seem bitter as heyal. ANd I wonder why ole girl and her dude didn’t get married. Seems a bit strange to me

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:48 am

Yeah, you know your marriage is doomed when you question ON YOUR HONEYMOON if you did the right thing. Surprised she’s still there 3 years later. They should really get some counseling. I think he actually may love her, but he’s testing her.

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:53 am

Slim – Yeah, Housewives is on hiatus til next week, I think.

Floyd’s wack game is so transparent I feel embarrassed that Chilli is 39 and still doesn’t get it.

Shaunie went IN on Gloria. She tried to keep it soooo classy last season. :lol: I thought Gloria was hella smug too though. Of course Matt isn’t pressed to marry her, they have kids, she’s not leaving…why should he??? Her sister’s situation with Gilbert Arenas is super crazy right now too.

Sassy Me...Onward and Upward :-)

January 3rd, 2011
10:55 am

he knows she wants him…she tries to play it cool but even she herself admitted how he can come back with something sweet to “open her back up”.

Yep and after the last time when he stood her up…on NATIONAL tv dude went and bought her a pair of 14,000 earings and ta daaa they’re cool again…she’s playing herself with him. She even defended him when they started talking about his domestic abuse case(s)…boi stooop.

BlackMagicWoman

January 3rd, 2011
10:55 am

SLIM….girl I watched both shows. I was like…OMG Chilli’s GYN is my GYN! Go Figure! :shock: I know….TMGDI right? :lol:

As far as B-ball Wives…I was like dayum, dude don’t give a rat’s a$$ about ole girl! He just got back from a vacay with his side piece(s). She is pretty…why does she deal with his mo-fugly goat looking a$$ is beyond me! :lol:
And Susie as a journalist…trick please..just like Evelyn said, “B*tch you can’t even speak!” I was on the floor with that one! :shock:

LEGGS..you know Evelyn is a NY’er! She says what she feels. But I agree she is beating a dead horse. She had said her piece…not just say nothing to Susie when she sees her would be more becoming.

ARED…girl you know I loves me some TrainWreck TV. Hene the reason I coined the term. It is like a train wreck…you know you should watch something so horrible. But you just can’t tear your eyes away! :lol:

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
10:56 am

Leggs – what tripped me out about Jabberjaws (great name by the way lol) was when she was saying how she isn’t happy and quickly he said well get out of the situation because I’M GOOD…what!!! Are you kidding me…if that wasn’t a slap in the face, I don’t know what then. He’s good because he is and has been doing whatever the heyal he wants. He didn’t even come home the previous day when he said he was, nor answered her calls or texts. Guess him and the sideline chick decided to stay an extra day on the beach…walking in with his flip flops. LOL!

‘My one friend said it looks like he could bite through a chain linked fence’

Ared – You need to grab the windex & paper towels…my screen is covered in spat out coffee :lol: :lol: So if he was in one of the Saw movies, he would have no problem chewing through his own arm to escape? Lmao!

Speaking of Royce, what kind of friends sets you up and leads the dogs to you. She told the pack where she would be…and I don’t blame Suzi for not wanting to attend their functions because she already knows it’s going to turn into her getting cursed out. Evelyn needs to go sit down and burn that wack azz wedding dress. I’m glad for her sake she didn’t have to end up wearing that. :lol:

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
10:57 am

why does she deal with his mo-fugly goat looking a$$ is beyond me!

:lol:

Cuz she still has access to his bank account. :lol:

It’s cold game that he just doesn’t pick up the phone or return her calls.

Sassy Me...Onward and Upward :-)

January 3rd, 2011
10:58 am

Her sister’s situation with Gilbert Arenas is super crazy right now too.

They broke up a few weeks ago…it was one of those thigs that made you go :???: when you heard about it.

Shaunie went H.A.A.M on Gloria…and Royce set it all up.

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
11:00 am

@Sassy – Yeah, they did break up…but she’s pregnant with child #4! And they got engaged and never got married either!

That baby could be Shaq’s… :lol:

THE INFAMOUS DK

January 3rd, 2011
11:01 am

Happy New Year!!!!!!! The Infamous one sends you a great year to you and yours.. Theres no need for a chase.. If ya’ll like each other.. Get to know each other..

AmazonRed™ - beat up her alarm clock

January 3rd, 2011
11:03 am

Evelyn needs to go sit down and burn that wack azz wedding dress

That dress was horrendous. And since it’s still sitting at the shop, it’s probably not even paid for. :lol: She needs to fall back on even going in there!

SlimNumeroUno

January 3rd, 2011
11:03 am

‘Her sister’s situation with Gilbert Arenas is super crazy right now too.’

Ared – I haven’t heard about that…what’s the 411 on that situation? (And is this the same sister accused of messing with Shaq?)

Sassy – As hard as Chilli is on the guys she dates, I’m surprised being stood up AND his domestic violence case hasn’t caused her to drop it altogether. When it comes to someone you REALLY like, guess they get a hall pass for your usual Dealbreakers.

BMW – Daaaaang, you must have a celeb CT…doctor all on tv and ish. :lol: