Boomerang: When BAD dating karma finds you
I think every single woman needs a male friend. It’s one of the most enlightening relationships you can have because it gives you a chance to see men in a unfiltered, uncensored state. My guy friends are fairly candid with me about what they feel, how they deal, and the way they think. It has saved me a boatload of therapy to know them!
When they are going through a tough break up, I try to be supportive. I have seen them in their player days when they didn’t care so much about heartbreak they caused. I have also witnessed the moment when they realize that a female has “their nose wide open” and they are vulnerable for the first time ever.
This is when they get a little taste of what women go through. Men deal with breakups differently then we do but they definitely feel it as deeply as we do, especially when cheating was involved!
How do men deal with break-ups? From what I can tell, a lot of booze and sport fixation. They begin to meet as many women as possible to forget the one that betrayed him. Of course, this doesn’t do anything but distract them temporarily.
Have you ever watched someone who was a player suddenly get a little taste of what they put others through? Were you a heart breaker that seemed to get a little of that heartbreak back in one bad breakup or relationship?
What did you learn when you bad karma caught up to you? Do you think it changed how you handled dating after that experience?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Blog
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443 comments Add your comment
Fion
December 28th, 2010
2:29 pm
Delight23_ I here ya. For real though, I wish I understood the commdities and currency markets better. 2011 should be hot there.
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:29 pm
Dreams, how was the dating scene in L.A?
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:31 pm
I am very upfront and tell them what may be a deal breaker. Darling, I really like you but you can’t fix ugly…and unfortunately ugly is a deal breaker for me.
SexyCool
December 28th, 2010
2:31 pm
DreamsMat – I have to agree. If folks are struggling on $60K (especially if they are single), then they have some pss poor money management skills and/or some misplaced priorities.
2CPTG©--"that dude from da innanet"
December 28th, 2010
2:31 pm
Dreams….I can attest to this too ~~~~~> “that LESS than $60k can cover all that and some.”
conversely, all that tells me is that Delight is a big spender!
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:35 pm
(As I see Delight and her new man)
I see you driving ’round town
With the girl i love and i’m like,
F you!
Oo, oo, ooo
I guess the change in my pocket
Wasn’t enough i’m like,
F you!
And f her too!
I said, if i was richer, i’d still be with ya
Ha, now ain’t that some shhhh?
And although there’s pain in my chest
I still wish you the best with a…
F you!
Oo, oo, ooo
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:36 pm
Delight is related to the Professor, you got to have some money to mess with those women LOL
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:39 pm
Maybe, it’s me, maybe I bore u
No no, it’s my fault, cos I can’t afford u
Maybe baby, puffy, jay z
would all be better for u
Cos all I can do is luv u
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:42 pm
She takes my money, when I’m in need. Yes she’s a trifling, friend indeed. Oh, she’s a gold digger way over town that digs on me…Now I ain’t saying she a gold digger
mytw♥cents
December 28th, 2010
2:43 pm
Yup, a good soundtrack for that mindset.
QC
December 28th, 2010
2:44 pm
Who ever said ‘having a heater blow on you in a cold office don’t make you sleepy was a liar’ HELP ME….I’M SOOOOOOOO SLEEPY
DreamsMaterialize
December 28th, 2010
2:45 pm
After being saved (I was saved in July) it’s been hard for me to go thru with the act of hunching.
I am What does being saved have to do with sex?
For real though, I wish I understood the commdities and currency markets better. 2011 should be hot there.
Fion Emerging markets usually promise strong returns, although they tend to present substantially more risk because of their high volatility. If your older and have a family, it’s not the best option because you have too much to lose. If your young and have a little cash, I’d say do your research and go for it all day.
Dreams, how was the dating scene in L.A?
PR Off the chains! Think of your ideal type (whatever that is) and there’s a ton of those to choose from. You say you like Beyonce…well you could safely wake up one morning and decide you only wanted to date Beyonce types for the next year, and there would always be a fresh supply available.
SlimNumeroUno
December 28th, 2010
2:45 pm
‘how is your male friend situation going?’
Purp – It’s going…will keep you posted of any craziness.
Leggs
December 28th, 2010
2:48 pm
@QC ~ after lunch, these heaters are thy enemy!
mytw♥cents
December 28th, 2010
2:49 pm
Well, I meant the John Legend cuz it sounds to me like a No Romance without Finance 2011 mentality regarding what she feels it’ll take to support a chosen lifestyle. Not that she wants to just life off anybody.
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:51 pm
Dreams, are the women out there to get along with or are they damaged mentally?
QC
December 28th, 2010
2:51 pm
@ Leggs…yes they are but this one had it in for me before lunch and now i can’t stop yawning…..let me turn this thang off!!!
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:51 pm
Easy to get along with
Leggs
December 28th, 2010
2:52 pm
Thank you for the votes that have already come in…this is interesting and fun!
mytw♥cents
December 28th, 2010
2:53 pm
I know someone who’s super saved and employs hunching to control her base desires b/c she is contantly reminded to “Stay Saved!” via text and everyday conversation. Her efforts have led to two baby daddies, multiple broken engagements, and a constant struggle with living up to the lofty expectations of others. Apparently if the aim is to only hunch you wouldn’t have any actual birth control as they would suggest an intent for completion of the act? I guess.
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:54 pm
If I am dating, that person would not have a clue to how much I make until we were well into the relationship. Appearances can not be what they seem. The broke guy could be rich, the rich guy could be broke
Leggs
December 28th, 2010
2:54 pm
@WD ~ hope you decide to vote as well.
Delight23...resolving early
December 28th, 2010
2:56 pm
$60K ain’t covering all of that. TRUST.
Delight Hmmmm, I can attest that LESS than $60k can cover all that and some. When I finished grad school, I worked for the Air Force in California (way more expensive than Atlanta) making about $50k, and I owned a home, had two paid for vehicles, traveled, invested (stocks, mutual funds, 401k), and I was very active on the LA dating scene. I never had to eat Pizza Hut because I usually cooked, but I could eat out when I wanted. I also maintained my own lawn instead of paying someone to do it. No HOA fees because I did the legwork to find a nice neighborhood where they didn’t have any. If someone is making $60k-$80k in Atlanta and just getting by, then they need to come see me…let me put them on the right path. I won’t even charge…much. lol
*********
You are comparing a gov’t salary and benefits with that of one in the private sector.
What I want out of my health plan may not what you want.
The amounts that I choose to invest, maxing out, may not be the amount you chose to invest, nor may be the total number of investments.
I want a “nice” neighborhood WITH an HOA for the security of my property values. I don’t need that one family who decides a Purple exterior with a water fountain 2/3 the size of the front lawn is their idea of a home improvement.
When I travel I certainly make the effort to obtain the best deals, BUT I have no acess to the readily given military discount. This includes the discounts afforded to you by shopping on base for everything from a set of tires to a lof of bread.
You can’t compare Uncle Sam to private sector. I stand by my assessment that comfortable for some is getting by for others.
Celisea
December 28th, 2010
2:56 pm
I see right now this gonna be a bashing session for saved folks. For all that don’t know being saved ain’t an out of body experience and nope God does not remove anything you felt before you got save. Subsequent to believing, you start making choices based on your faith and belief but never do you cross over into becoming perfect. Too, good thing God is a forgiving God cause humans can be something else
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:57 pm
I would think that the act of sex is only one of many obstacles in a path of being “saved”. Nobody is perfect so why try to be..just do your best in every situation.
Celisea
December 28th, 2010
2:57 pm
I would think that the act of sex is only one of many obstacles in a path of being “saved”. Nobody is perfect so why try to be..just do your best in every situation.
Let me just repost this…it bears repeating
Leggs
December 28th, 2010
2:58 pm
How do you stay “saved” but can still hunch??? Why hunch if you have no intention of pentration. I do not, I do not, I do not believe in working myself up nor him only to turn around and O in my clothes or even worse, to stop in the middle of a hunch burn. I don’t get it!!! I don’t start what I have no intention of finishing. Now, that’s playing with my nerves! If you can hunch you can go all the way. Just because you haven’t taken your clothes off doesn’t make you more of a person….WTH????
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
2:59 pm
Celisea, I don’t think anyone is bashing “saved” folks. I know what salvation is and the choice of obtaining salvations and I know that you can not lose salvation. If someone is worried about what others are saying about their salvation, they need to question themselves on if they really have salvation
Celisea
December 28th, 2010
3:00 pm
….and if you’re hunching…the Good Lord would tell you gon head and gitcha some…come on back, repent and start over (on your path to abstinence). The act, thought or intention all places you in the same place. If you get that far into, gon head and start over tomorrow. Okay, I’m backing off and lurking….
Delight23...resolving early
December 28th, 2010
3:00 pm
conversely, all that tells me is that Delight is a big spender!
2G You need to READ both sides of the discussion. My spending is in my savings. I pay me first. Additionally I am working on investment property outside of the US.
Ultimately what your statement tells me is you have selective reading and lazily run with it.
Celisea
December 28th, 2010
3:01 pm
Celisea, I don’t think anyone is bashing “saved” folks
I said that’s where it was heading
Leggs
December 28th, 2010
3:01 pm
@Celisea ~ don’t get me wrong…I truly am bashing hunching, not being saved! You’re absolutely right, the feeling remains whether you saved or not, just don’t use “being saved” as the reason why you’re hunching.
Hey, perhaps it’s me. Maybe I don’t have the right definition to hunching. To me, it means dry humping while in your clothes, busting slob all over the place but no penetration of female to male appendage. The end result was still reached, but now you have wet panties? So, I’m only bashing hunching.
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
3:02 pm
Leggs, do you act on every action that you think about? Because in some circles if you think it you might as well do it.
Fion
December 28th, 2010
3:03 pm
“I see right now this gonna be a bashing session for saved folks.”
All hethens to the left please. let’s keep the lines moving folks!
SexyCool
December 28th, 2010
3:04 pm
I am LMAO. We are discussing *hunching*.
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
3:04 pm
Celisea,…well it’s almost 2012/2038 and a hunch will not suffice. Lord forgive me but I am going to fornicate and adulturate and penetrate that woman. LOL
Leggs
December 28th, 2010
3:05 pm
@PR ~ no, I don’t.
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
3:05 pm
SexyCool, LOL It just crossed my mind what adult still hunches?
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
3:05 pm
Which is better catching your kid hunching or having sex?
Celisea
December 28th, 2010
3:06 pm
Leggs – I was agreeing with you 2:58.
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
3:06 pm
Leggs, so you saying that you thought of hunching me but just didnt?
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
3:07 pm
How many hunch dates do you have before the sex date?
Fion
December 28th, 2010
3:08 pm
I’ve never read so many sexual repressed folks in my life. And ya’ll cracked on me about giving therpy as a gift! “Why I outta!”
Purple Rain
December 28th, 2010
3:08 pm
Please do not confuse hunching with humping. BIG DIFFERENCE
SexyCool
December 28th, 2010
3:08 pm
PR – I have a hunch that this topic is taking on a life of its own.
Delight23...resolving early
December 28th, 2010
3:08 pm
Which is better catching your kid hunching or having sex?
Celisea
December 28th, 2010
3:08 pm
PR – I’m just speaking to have full knowledge that one is no worse than the other. Not saying we don’t have bad thoughts…we all do. But knowlegdge is knowing taking or allowing myself to the brink void of penetr@tion AND BELIEVING it’s “not quite as bad” was my point…it’s all the same level of “bad” I ain’t knocking nobody cause I know my weaknesses…heck I LOVE sex…
Delight23...resolving early
December 28th, 2010
3:09 pm
It just crossed my mind what adult still hunches?
<<<—thinking same thing. Da h3ll?
Celisea
December 28th, 2010
3:09 pm
I have a hunch that this topic is taking on a life of its own.
LOL ba domp domp
kimmie-soon to be Mrs.
December 28th, 2010
3:09 pm
That saved “no intention of following thru” thus not using birth control mindset is classic DL behavior also. It means admitting that you are going to do something you profess not to believe in doing outside of marriage.
It gets a lot of people in trouble. Like Leggs said and what I’ve said before, don’t put yourself in that situation to begin with. No need in looking crazy later when you have to pay the consequences.