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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Where do you find the good guys?

One of the most common questions women ask me when they hear I write about dating is where are all the good men in Atlanta. As if I have the physical address to a magical man tree somewhere in the city that grows good men that you can just go grab off the vine. Good guys are everywhere!

I can’t guarantee that they are the type of men that will appeal to them (or vice versa). Who knows if that elusive chemistry will spark an interest or not. I just know that they are out there and you don’t have to look far.

The gym, recycle center, Trader Joes, churches, and records stores are pretty prime locations that have made me stop and think, “Ok, I must always look cute when I come here” because it’s crawling with the types I am drawn to. A lot of times women don’t realize that some of the best guys to date are already their friends!

When was the last time you were out somewhere and thought that it was hottie central?

I was hanging out in Smyrna at a wing place on karaoke night and I couldn’t believe the number of cuties that were there. Who knew!?

Where do you think the quality women are? How do quality men seek out their counterparts? What are the best places to meet someone that you think is compatible to you?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Blog

429 comments Add your comment

Blackfoote

December 23rd, 2010
11:47 am

blue:

On my hunting trip I have bagged a partridge in a pair tree, two turtle doves, three french hens, four calling birds,found five gold rings,saw six geese laying, seven swans swimming and 8 quails for you but you can keep that holiday bread-(fruit cake). Yuk

czBrat

December 23rd, 2010
11:47 am

speaking of food, i’m trying my very first prime rib roast this xmas!! i’m sick to death of doing ham, but i did buy a small one just in case i much up the roast. :lol:
wish me luck!!!

BlackMagicWoman

December 23rd, 2010
11:48 am

Kym--Live from Holiday Central

December 23rd, 2010
11:50 am

@czBrat let me know how it turns out..I was thinking I wanted to try that this year but I am going down home with family so ham and turkey will be on the menu.

Leggs

December 23rd, 2010
11:53 am

@ARed ~ I don’t have happy hr $$ so I’ll stay in pjs and see what’s left in my cabinet under my sink.

@czB ~ that’s one meat I never mess up. Roasts are my middle name. I don’t want the traditional Christmas dinner. Between Thanksgiving and New Year’s I don’t need the same dishes. Tomorrow, I’m grilling ribs (well maybe put them in the oven), baked chicken, potatoe salad, corn on the cobb and baked beans with a walnut caramel apple pie for dessert.

Willie Dynamite

December 23rd, 2010
11:53 am

Brat – Rib Roast is great just dont overcook it. Invest in a good thermometer and err on the side of undercooked. Remember after you take it out it will continue to cook and the internal temp will rise about another 10 degrees. You can always cook it more but when its overcooked then ya money is gone.

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
11:55 am

Part 1
I was on the phone with this chick I know last night. She has a *main* dude (that they don’t have a commitment, they have an understanding) and “them other ninjas I deal with from time to time.” (her words)

She was talking about how she has “pretty much shut all them other ninjas down and is just focusing on John. Well, except Darnell. You know he still comes over every now and then. But you know Darnell works that crazy schedule at the fire department and then when he’s off, he has his daughter. So, I don’t get to see him that often.”

Says that last week, she had to shut down Nathaniel “you remember him, he’s the one that went back to his girlfriend” because when he came over last week to watch a movie, she got mad at him because she asked him to move one of her televisions from one room to another and he didn’t feel like doing it. Says that she went off saying that everytime she asks him to do something, he has a problem doing it and that she put him out of her house.

My response – “Why did you get mad? He doesn’t have any obligations to do anything for you. His obligation is to the chick that he is in a relationship with. You just the chick he … He don’t come to your house to perform *that* kind of manual labor. That’s what he does at his girlfriend’s house.”

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
11:57 am

Continuation….

“So, what are you doing for Christmas?”

“I’m gone be here by myself, probably. You know, I haven’t met all of John’s daughters, just the oldest one and he gone have them on Christmas and we really haven’t talked about how we’re going to handle that. I don’t know if he’s inviting me over or not. So, I’m just gonna play it by ear. Hell, I need to be working out. You know my 40th birthday is coming up and I’m going on some trips. Yeah, John is taking me to Cabo. You know we been kicking for three years now.”

Derby

December 23rd, 2010
12:00 pm

Random thought…

Was grooving to Chris Brown’s No BS until I started listening to the words….boy I tell ya, he shole make a booty call sounds smooth as heyal

Yes he does :-)

SlimNumeroUno

December 23rd, 2010
12:00 pm

Murray Crimmus to all yall nutz! I’m off to get the oil changed and run some errands. Peace Owt!

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
12:01 pm

As I was sitting there listening to her, I actually felt sorry for her.

She is really cute chick. Has it going on, on the outside. Body banging. Divorced, no kids. Has a master’s degree in speech. Words in the school system. Is a homeowner. Lots of fun to be around.

But utterly frickin’ clueless. She wonders why we only talk when she calls me.

This is one of those examples of Fion’s folks that could use a counseling certificate, but would be offended by it because she doesn’ think she’s doing anything wrong.

Leggs

December 23rd, 2010
12:03 pm

@czB ~ after the first hour of cooking, baste your meat every 30 mins or so. You’ll do just fine.

@SexyC ~ your friend sounds like a coo coo bird. Oops, I shouldn’t say that. Sorry! How can she juggle all those men. Ok, she’s shutting the others down, but still???

czBrat

December 23rd, 2010
12:03 pm

kym, i get regular recipe emails from kraft and this one just looked to dang easy to pass up so i’m gonna give it a go. i’ll let you know.

leggs, i alwasy do roasts in the slow cooker, but this is an oven roast recipe (and an expensive roast) so i’m a bit nervous …. and excited!

wd, just UGH on the thermometer cuz i sure was gonna look up some cook times online and just try to wing it. i think the recipe calls for 1hr 45 min cook time and 15-20 min sit time for it to be medium. i’m shooting for med-well. thanx for the info!

ok. now lemme go back and check out this novela from SexyC. :lol:

mytw♥cents

December 23rd, 2010
12:03 pm

There are good people, then there are people who are actually good for YOU. Two good people won’t necessarily complement each other. As much as it pains us to admit sometimes those who should theoretically work for us just don’t. Some folks are real cool but then completely volatile w/ a certain person. Or their light seems somehow diminished –like they don’t really bring you down in life, but they ain’t really elevating ya, either. I think we play a part in this too because we have to allow someone else’s light to fuse with ours and embellish it. Sometimes we allow every bit of b.s. in, but deflect positive energy.

mytw♥cents

December 23rd, 2010
12:05 pm

Hi CZBRAT… Snip, snip, chop, chop, do something with those locks! What about layering it just enough that you can’t revert back to the pony for awhile?

Leggs

December 23rd, 2010
12:05 pm

@SexyC ~ sounds like your friend is trying way to hard. She’s looking for love from all the wrong men. Do you think she loves herself. Love has to start with her first.

Kym--Live from Holiday Central

December 23rd, 2010
12:05 pm

@Sexy you know what..I got lost somewhere between John Darrell and the trip to Cabo..too much drama..I don’t know her and I am tired already.

Fion

December 23rd, 2010
12:06 pm

Sexy_11:55 the majic word that kills everything “OBLIGATION.”

AmazonRed™ - yay vacay!

December 23rd, 2010
12:08 pm

But utterly frickin’ clueless. She wonders why we only talk when she calls me.

The “ah ha” moment comes at different time for many of us. I’m sure all of us had friends who were shaking their heads at some of the “relationships” we’ve been in over the years. So our friends don’t need us to feel sorry for them, they’ll just need support until they realize they deserve better.

Fion

December 23rd, 2010
12:10 pm

czBrat_ Stand the Rib Roast bone down. 350 degrees 2 1/2 hours. Medium Well perfect.
Or check Tyler Florence Food Network (website) just follow the instructions, you’ll be fine.

YourThoughts

December 23rd, 2010
12:13 pm

@SC Have you ever suggested to your friend the blocking principle?

Yes, I would feel sorry for her also and suggest she take some time away from her ‘misters’ till she values herself.

Fion

December 23rd, 2010
12:13 pm

….Sexy 11:55 post and Women really wonder why dudes holla hold up wait a minute.

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
12:14 pm

You can feel sorry for someone and support them at the same time. (Kinda like donating to Haiti victims, homeless people and Jerry’s Kids.)

And supporting a person doesn’t mean that I should silently stand by while they make questionable decisions.

Tough love and straight talk is a form of support. And is the number one reason that although I frequently say things that she doesn’t like, she still considers me a friend because she knows that it comes from a place of “been there, done that, learned better” and of concern for her well being.

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
12:16 pm

YT – on more than one occasion. But like ARed said, the “aha moment” comes at different times for different people. She obviously has not had hers yet.

Fion

December 23rd, 2010
12:16 pm

…….shifting gears, sometims it’s a jump-off, always was, always will be, but sometime folks just can’t see it for what it is. Not bad folks, just sometme they need glasses!

Jeff

December 23rd, 2010
12:17 pm

I know I qualify as a good guy. My issue is I tend to be a little too quiet or shy, which women interpret as not interested. I was also with my ex-wife for 7 years, and while I’ve been divorced for a year and a half, I don’t feel like I know what I’m doing when it comes to dating. Its tough when you’re a guy who just wants to find a woman to settle down and have a family with, and yet, you don’t seem to meet quality women.

AmazonRed™ - yay vacay!

December 23rd, 2010
12:17 pm

SCool – You don’t have to sit up here and point out to me the virtues of “tough love.” I understand that one quite well. ;)

No one is saying be silent, either. What I’m saying is that most folks don’t need you to “pity” them, you wouldn’t want anyone to pity you for your choices.

czBrat

December 23rd, 2010
12:19 pm

2bits, bite your tonge!!! too short for a pony? never! i did long layers last year but they grew out in a couple weeks, so i tried shorter layers earlier this year. it makes for a very nice fall when i wear it out straight with just a bump of the curling iron, but i’m kinda lazy, so that’s a rare sighting indeed.

thanx Fion. thanx leggs. i really don’t think i can screw this up. i’m getting hungry.

Leggs

December 23rd, 2010
12:19 pm

“Tough love and straight talk is a form of support.” Yes, it is. I have a good friend that has a loser for a boyfriend, After the 2nd year I told her what I thought about him because she noticed that I was always distant and curt when around him. I told her I was going to say this only once. I don’t like him. He’s draining you and he stays in jail. He’s draining her emotionally, financially and spirtually. He’s now in jail and she packed his belongings so he can skiddaddle when he’s released. She recently met a nice young man a few weeks ago.

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
12:20 pm

She just happens to be an example of what we’ve been talking about today. She is quick to say, “Ninjas ain’t no good.” And I respond with, “As long as you’re juggling a bunch of no good ninjas, you’re not that good yourself.”

Her fear is that having put herself out there and been hurt before, she thinks that she is hedging her bets by not putting all of her eggs in one basket. (I know, I’ve done exactly that.)

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
12:20 pm

Well, some of my choices have been quite pitiful. So, it would be warranted.

Fion

December 23rd, 2010
12:21 pm

I’m gonna make aot of ya’ll women mad, but truth be told in the ATL, it’s a hole lot of
quanity, but there is a shortage of quality.

AmazonRed™ - yay vacay!

December 23rd, 2010
12:22 pm

:lol: @ SCool. Alright then. :lol:

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
12:23 pm

That doesn’t make me mad. It’s true and it goes both ways. I have never been on that subscribed to that “shortage of men” theory. What was lacking was the “quality.”

AmazonRed™ - yay vacay!

December 23rd, 2010
12:23 pm

Fion – That doesn’t make me mad. I know I’m quality and your statement just illustrates that I’m special then. :lol:

Jeff

December 23rd, 2010
12:24 pm

Fion is right from what I’ve seen. A lot of women who claim to want a quality guy, but when he’s right there in front of them, they toss him aside.

Leggs

December 23rd, 2010
12:25 pm

@Jeff ~ welcome to the club. I’m a good woman, and it’s hard for ME to find quality men. I know they’re out there, but since none of them are knocking on my door, I realize I have to make my awesome presence known in an unconventional way. When I find out what that “way” is, I’ll be sure to let you know. :lol:

As For Real would say, I shouldn’t define myself as a good woman, that others should say this. Well, that’s exactly what I’m doing! Hell some might say I look like I’ve been hit in the face with a bunch of nickels doesn’t make it fact. How I feel about myself is my fact!

AmazonRed™ - yay vacay!

December 23rd, 2010
12:28 pm

A lot of women who claim to want a quality guy, but when he’s right there in front of them, they toss him aside

Cuz if you don’t think there is a shortage, you can hold out for what you want. Men are notorious for letting good for a good woman, but they always think they can find another when they are “ready.”

David Granger

December 23rd, 2010
12:29 pm

If you women really wanted one of the “good guys”, then I wouldn’t get laid half as much as I do. What you all really want, when you filter through all the BS, is one of us selfish assholes…yeah, I admit it…to suddenly change and treat you like one of those nerdy “good guys” would, if you paid him the least bit of attention.
Ain’t gonna happen…

SexyCool

December 23rd, 2010
12:29 pm

“but they always think they can find another when they are “ready.”

Passing the $10 back.

i'm swiss™

December 23rd, 2010
12:29 pm

RE: quality men, quality women, etc…

It’s not that there’s a shortage of either, but you just have to find the right person for you. Just because a chic or dude doesn’t do it for you doesn’t mean she/he is not quality. What’s the old Grace Jones song…? “I’m not perfect… but I’m perfect — for you…” :lol: That’s what’s hard to find.

BTW… Jeff — Do I know you? Are you a Cornhuskers fan, by any chance?

AmazonRed™ - yay vacay!

December 23rd, 2010
12:32 pm

Thanks SCool – I need that money for grammar check. :lol:

Should have read “men are notorious for letting go of a good woman…” Sheesh. :lol:

Celisea...on vacay

December 23rd, 2010
12:34 pm

I’ve had friends in situations where they’re not thinking clearly…it’s REAL hard for me to hold my tongue in such cases. A real friend will have the talk. Even if it takes forever to have that “awakening” you shouldn’t be able to sit by and just watch. I’ve lost a friend as a result of showing tough love. Honestly though what was worst the pain of remaining delusional or the pain of somebody handing you a huge dose of reality? Now after I make the effort to shed light on what you’re obviously oblvious to, it’s on you to remain. Too, on
ly subsequent to “tough love” will I become a listener….and even to that only a couple of times will I endure foolishness. That
mess can be contagious. And no I’ve haven’t made all “right” choices but I’ve been happy (maybe not at the time) that my girls had a sit down with me.

BlackMagicWoman

December 23rd, 2010
12:34 pm

CZ…might I suggest a Dominican salon.

Luvbug

December 23rd, 2010
12:35 pm

Just because a chic or dude doesn’t do it for you doesn’t mean she/he is not quality.

Right!!

Leggs

December 23rd, 2010
12:37 pm

@ARed ~ if there was a pot for all misspelled words or run on sentences, Blogsville would be able to buy that much needed neon sign at the front entrance!

The sign would read “ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!”

Raqi V

December 23rd, 2010
12:37 pm

I just want to wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy and Safe New Year.

This year for me has brought many blessings. Just reading this blog with the good and the bad is a small one of those blessings.

I will leave this year having been given and having had taken away. And having opened up doors and closed others.

Merry Christmas, Feliz Navidad, Joyeux Noel.

AmazonRed™ - yay vacay!

December 23rd, 2010
12:38 pm

BMW – I loves me a Dominican salon! But I got out here and was trippin at how they charge as much as the black ones! :lol: You know up north our blow outs were $15.

There is one that just opened up in the Cascades here in my hood. I’m gonna try just because they are so close to the house.

blue© - final day, and i'm out!!!

December 23rd, 2010
12:38 pm

@Celisea – im inclined to agree with you there. for me, the mark of a true friend is that they tell what you need to hear, not just what you want to hear…and they arent just silent when they could honestly help you…and yeah, gone thru some outs with GF’s in the past that way, had a few who came back round and said that they were mad at first, but when they were thinking clearly appreciated me being a true friend, and others who chose to bail altogether, kept repeating the same cycle of foolish, xcept now i dont have to hear about it lol

Fion

December 23rd, 2010
12:38 pm

.Man alll I’m saying is a lot women role up on you liks they are Queen Gwenivier, when in reality the quality is jump-off at best. Just saying.