Are you a seasonal fling?
I know. It sounds like some kind of flu bug that you catch, right? Maybe it’s harsh to think that your new romance is just a fling. Nobody wants to be “boo’d” up for the winter months only to find out that once the temps return to above freezing (seriously Atlanta?!) , you’re going to be swiftly dismissed. It happens to the best of us!
It’s sort of a running joke with this guy I am seeing now. We both have a sarcastic, sometimes dark humor, so when I actually call him my winter dude, he chuckles. I don’t truly think there is an expiration date on the romance, but that little joke we have going sort of takes off any pressure to commit too soon.
Do you think that you date in seasons? Do you have a tendency to couple up and get close to someone just to snuggle with them? Is that necessarily a bad thing?
How do you know if you are just a fling to someone? If that is all that you are interested in, should you let the person know? Do you think that would prevent them from becoming too attached or is that just what we tell ourselves?
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141 comments Add your comment
SlimNumeroUno
December 14th, 2010
8:36 am
(Slim now placing space heaters all throughout blogsville) Brrrrrrr, somebody has to knock this chill off.
Do you think that you date in seasons? Nope
Do you have a tendency to couple up and get close to someone just to snuggle with them? Nope
Is that necessarily a bad thing? Not unless you are misleading the other person to think it is going to be something more than temporary.
How do you know if you are just a fling to someone? Depends on what you two have discussed, what sort of things you do together, if any future plans/talks have been made…blah blah blah
2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"
December 14th, 2010
8:36 am
G’morning….
“How do you know if you are just a fling to someone?”——-If they don’t tell you, then you don’t/won’t know…
” If that is all that you are interested in, should you let the person know?”——-depends.
“Do you think that would prevent them from becoming too attached or is that just what we tell ourselves?”——that too depends….
SlimNumeroUno
December 14th, 2010
8:41 am
Oooh wow….1st. I really didn’t prepare for this, I mean, had I known I had a chance I would’ve thrown together an acceptance speech. Um…I’ll just wing it then. (cough, cough ahem) So first I’d like to thank God for getting me up on time this morning and allowing my safe arrival to work today. Also, must thank Him for keeping me calm when I went through Stockbridge to discover all the power was out, therefore leading to more traffic since none of the traffic lights were working. I must also send a special shout out to the Mickey D’s off 138 for getting my order correct & delivered in a timely fashion. And lastly, must thank my lil bacon bit (car) for trucking through these low temps to get me from point A to point F w/o incident. Thank you, thank you, thank you (Slim now holding back tears…well not really because they’ve immediately frozen on contact)
YesSheIsCute
December 14th, 2010
8:46 am
Good morning everyone…I hope I get to pop back in here after saying my piece but I don’t think I had a fling based on the season…and I don’t think I have been a fling based on season and when I say season I mean solstice. I’m sure we’ve all had and been flings based on a personal “season” in your life.
blue©
December 14th, 2010
8:50 am
Morning Peoples,
@Slim – lolol, too funny, thansk, good to start the day with a laugh!
Boo’d up for the season? naw, aint familiar with that one, tho im sure for those who dont want to go home for the holidays alone again, thats probably about right.
If that is all that you are interested in, should you let the person know? Do you think that would prevent them from becoming too attached or is that just what we tell ourselves? LOL, nooo!! some people are just all out, heart in it no matter. you say your not interested, to them its your just not interested YET lmao
Rell - 23 months to retirement
December 14th, 2010
9:30 am
this is how you spit game and throw money…lol…crazy
http://mediatakeout.com/45419/id.html?sms_ss=twitter&at_xt=4d0779b6e7ebf58f,0
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
9:33 am
Good morning everyone!
Do you think that you date in seasons? Nope
Do you have a tendency to couple up and get close to someone just to snuggle with them? Nope
Is that necessarily a bad thing? It can be if you’ve misled your mate into thinking much more could develop.
How do you know if you are just a fling to someone? If you look at his actions, listen to his words, lack of spending quality time with each other, you really will know!
@SlimNU ~ should have known you would be the one to actually give an acceptance speech for being first…you are a riot!
Fion
December 14th, 2010
9:38 am
“How do you know if you are just a fling to someone”?
Strongest line I’ve ever been told by a woman:
“I’m not concerned about being your significant other, just your insignificant other for a while”.
Sassy Me..10 days til MY birthday :-)
December 14th, 2010
9:47 am
Do you think that you date in seasons? No, actually I’m not dating at all…maybe that is a season in itself…dry season(pun not intended..I don’t think).
Do you have a tendency to couple up and get close to someone just to snuggle with them? No that’s not nice if you’re doing it with false pretenses…that smacks of usery.
How do you know if you are just a fling to someone?
If I only see you or hear from you late at night or ONLY during the day OR on weekends then that’d pretty much be obvious at that point. Luckily that’s sooo not me.
If that is all that you are interested in, should you let the person know?
I don’t know b/c it could turn either way…the person could chill and not catch feelings or some develope feelings anyway regardless of the disclaimer given at the onset. Who knows, it could legitimately turn into something you both want…
BlackMagicWoman
December 14th, 2010
10:00 am
Ok…I picked on you guys about your freezing temps. Well now the artic blast and snow has rached NY!
I brought a heating pad to work since the said no space heaters! 
Rell….Oh I read that article! Now as belly dancer I am used to having money thrown at me…but not millions! I need to get my game up!
Sassy Me..10 days til MY birthday :-)
December 14th, 2010
10:07 am
Well now the artic blast and snow has rached NY!
Y’all up top folks should be used to it BlackMagic
You ever coming back to the “A”?
cba
December 14th, 2010
10:12 am
Slim, thanks for the laugh @8:41. Cam Newton should have seeked your service before his Heisman’s speech
. In a few months, he’ll have millions to pay speech writer.
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
10:32 am
Morning all -
Dating in seasons…? Not exactly, but I do acknowledge when my “stock” dips and rises. My stock always drops in the colder months. Not only do I stay inside more, but when guys want to “boo up” they go for the ones with a little more meat on their bones.
Also, my birthday also falls within the holidays season, so it’s cheaper.
But once the weather starts warming up, and skin starts to show, my stock goes back up, and Miss Biscuits and Gravy gets pushed to the side.
(Keeping it light people, don’t mind me
)
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
10:35 am
Oooh wow….1st. I really didn’t prepare for this, I mean, had I known I had a chance I would’ve thrown together an acceptance speech. Um…I’ll just wing it then
You are sooooo funny!
SlimNumeroUno
December 14th, 2010
10:38 am
BMW – We aren’t supposed to have space heaters here at work either but guess what…..WE HAVE A SPACE HEATER!!!!!
abc
December 14th, 2010
10:44 am
While I can get with ‘to everything there is a season’, it’s a bit of a stretch to think that anyone would tie their relationship status to the temperature or solstice. Really? No, really?
Sorry baby, but when Daylight Savings kicks back in, we’re through! Hm.
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
10:57 am
While I can get with ‘to everything there is a season’, it’s a bit of a stretch to think that anyone would tie their relationship status to the temperature or solstice. Really? No, really?
I happens tho. There are ones you’d snuggle up with when it’s cold you really wouldn’t want to take out in public when it’s warm.
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
11:00 am
“…and Miss Biscuits and Gravy gets pushed to the side.”
Too funny!
I doubt I could work here if they took my heater. Well, I could, but I’ll bytch and moan everyday until they gave in!
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
11:05 am
Woo Hoo, Woo Hoo! Got my check yesterday from The Regis and Kelly Show…just in time for chrismus!!!
SexyCool
December 14th, 2010
11:06 am
Three Words Daily – Follow your heart.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2010
11:10 am
Y’all know Wise got a twisted ass sense of humor and some of what she writes is tongue in cheek, right?
kimmie
December 14th, 2010
11:12 am
Good chilly morning!
Congrats Leggs, on getting that check!!!!
BMW – Like you, I got a heating pad too. More than one way to skin a cat, so they say!!LOL!!!
On topic – No, don’t do flings, seasonal or otherwise. I’m just not built for them emotionally. I’m always thinking down the road to when it’s over. When I was not in a relationship around the holidays, I would just have fun with my family & friends, especially my little nieces & nephews & cousins. That kept loneliness to a minimum. If I’m not good enough for all 4 seasons with a dude, then I’m not good enough for any.
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
11:13 am
You’re pretty lucky there Leggs. You win a lot of stuff!
SexyCool
December 14th, 2010
11:13 am
And what is superhilarious to me this morning is that SlimGoody got so into writing her acceptance speech that by the time she posted it…she wasn’t first anymore…
SlimGoody, I’m happy you WERE first and I’m gone let you finish…but…I gotta say, that Cuba Gooding, Jr. had the best acceptance speech of all time. *kanye shrug*
blue©
December 14th, 2010
11:17 am
@ARed – There are ones you’d snuggle up with when it’s cold you really wouldn’t want to take out in public when it’s warm – thats just wrong lol
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
11:19 am
@ARed – There are ones you’d snuggle up with when it’s cold you really wouldn’t want to take out in public when it’s warm – thats just wrong lol
Absolutely…but we can’t act like it doesn’t happen.
SexyCool
December 14th, 2010
11:20 am
On topic – I have *flung* in the past, but am at a point where they just don’t work for who I am anymore.
And as to the how do you know you are a fling or do you let someone know if they are and the becoming too attached of it all…See the Friends with Benefits contract template…same rules apply.
abc
December 14th, 2010
11:24 am
I guess a fat chick that keeps you warm in the winter is fine until it’s time to take a trip to the beach, eh, AmazonRed? I can actually relate to that. There were plenty of chicks I didn’t really care that much about. Nearly all of them, when you get right down to it — else they’d likely still be around, wouldn’t they.
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
11:26 am
@ARed ~ too many free things out there. I’m here in front of this computer all day. I’m going to play my games and register on free websites when I hear about them…Just got to win Megamillions! I hit Cash 3 last night!
Delight23 With Da Space Heater :-)
December 14th, 2010
11:26 am
Bom dia peoples!!! Hace frio!!!!!
“Sorry baby, but when Daylight Savings kicks back in, we’re through!”
Melo!!
December 14th, 2010
11:27 am
Done did deed….
like Ared explained the rationale perfectly.
I fondly remember those days when we smashed,but in the streets,we would pass each other like we didn’t know each other.
Lord,I confess my past sins!
morning!
kimmie
December 14th, 2010
11:28 am
SCool – Yeah, just sounds like a Holiday FWB!
They don’t work for who I am anymore either – never really did to be honest. Like I said, I’m just not built for that. I overthink everything and get too attached.
Never could get with messing around with someone I’m not attracted too either, someone I can only take out in the dark! Yuck, but to each his/her own!
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
11:31 am
@Melo ~ don’t confess your past sins on this blog…pretty sure some of us will faint!!
kimmie
December 14th, 2010
11:32 am
Leggs – Do you pick your numbers or quick pick?
Melo!!
December 14th, 2010
11:36 am
Leggs?!
this cross is too heavy to bear so I gotta unload some of the skunk from time to time.
I am whatever you say I am
December 14th, 2010
11:38 am
Someone you are dating is either for a reason, season, and if you are
luckyblessed, a lifetime“People come into your life for a reason, a season, or
a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you
will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON . . . It is
usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have
come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you
with guidance and support, to aid you physically,
emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a
godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason
you need them to be.
Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an
inconvenient time, this person will say or do something
to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die.
Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realise is that our need has been met, our
desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you
sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.
When people come into your life for a SEASON . . .
Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount
of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things
you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional
foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the
person, and put what you have learned to use in all
other relationships and areas of your life. It is said
that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant……”
—-author unknown—–
2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"
December 14th, 2010
11:39 am
so you’re saying it’s big girl season?
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
11:42 am
I guess a fat chick that keeps you warm in the winter is fine until it’s time to take a trip to the beach, eh, AmazonRed?
BlackMagicWoman
December 14th, 2010
11:43 am
Sassy..yes chica. I plan on coming back in the early Spring.
ARED…girl I am cracking up…”Miss biscuits and gravy”!
I must admit I like biscuits…but gravy, yuck! 
KIMMIE…sitting on the heating pad on high is giving a new meaning to “toasted buns”!
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
11:43 am
I hit Cash 3 last night!
Melo!!
December 14th, 2010
11:44 am
unbelievable amount of joy….,,,
YES…
because of I am’s explanation in that penultimate paragraph, I withdraw my confession earlier above!
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
11:44 am
@kimmie ~ I pick my own numbers! One up one down. I’ve been playing my bday for some time now…129. I don’t play everyday, but when I do, one up one down = 129, 128 and 127. Megamillions, I pick numbers that mean something to me (could be why I haven’t won yet). I’m a firm believer that machines are rigged in various parts of the city to never produce a winning quick pick!
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
11:45 am
@ARed ~ if you play $1.00 straight = $500
SexyCool
December 14th, 2010
11:45 am
I had never read that before. I’m so glad you posted it.
Leggs
December 14th, 2010
11:47 am
@ARed ~ I play $1 straight and sometimes $1 box. I only played straight yesterday since I had gift card on me and only $3 in my wallet.
AmazonRed™
December 14th, 2010
11:48 am
@ARed ~ if you play $1.00 straight = $500
Congrats!!! What a blessing!
2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"
December 14th, 2010
12:07 pm
“I’m a firm believer that machines are rigged in various parts of the city to never produce a winning quick pick!”
hmmmm…..
BlackMagicWoman
December 14th, 2010
12:16 pm
2C…I do too. What are they trying to say folks in Dunwoody don’t deserve to win?
I am going to take trip to nowhereville, GA and play!
SexyCool
December 14th, 2010
12:18 pm
I want to go back to yesterday’s topic for a moment.
At what point in the dating relationship should you bring up the *uncomfortable* sht? I’m just curious as to what your various thoughts on it would be.
I mean, because really, few have lived, fairytale, drama free lives. Most have something in their life that was traumatic or devastating or whatever. When, in getting to know someone, does it make sense to say “Hey, my exboyfriend cheated on me and it hurt.” or “My babymomma is slightly crazy and she will probably bring drama for the rest of my life.” or “I was molested.” or whatever?
Because when those kinds of things exist in our pasts, they affect who we are. And if we are not at least giving a potential suitor a glimpse into that, are we not presenting our true selves?
(I was trying to get to a point to express all of this yesterday. I just had so much going on that I could not string the thoughts together into coherent sentences that expressed a clear thought.)
Dan - Simply...Superior
December 14th, 2010
12:33 pm
@SC
Good or bad, we all go through things that make us look at life differently. They affect your perspective on life – adding new information or altering a view that you once held.
If a “potential suitor” is to ever truly know you (and you yourself), it’s important to know how these things affected you and communicate that to the other person.