Romantically Challenged?
Some of us have to work a little harder to be romantic. It just doesn’t come naturally and it makes it challenging to impress the person we really really like. So what is a romantically challenged person to do?
It’s like the old saying, practice makes perfect. Or you could go the whole “fake it till you make it” route. I think romance is one of those things that you get credit for effort and thought.
If you could plan an evening or weekend of romance, what would you want to do? If money was no object, what is the most romantic thing you could pull off?
Just because you are romantically challenged, doesn’t mean you are doomed to disappoint your dates. Creativity goes a long way!
Take time to listen to what your date is really into and start there. If a guy I was seeing found an event where my favorite author is appearing; or found out where my favorite local band (The 54) was playing and took me there, I would be smitten!
What is the most romantic thing someone has ever done for you or with you?
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333 comments Add your comment
2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"
December 10th, 2010
10:00 am
mornin…..
I ain’t gon lie, I am not a romantic person at all…..
Purple Rain
December 10th, 2010
10:06 am
If money were not an object I would rent an island staffed with a chef and 2 butlers for a weekend. I would like that island to have a nice bay area that is only about 4ft deep. I also would like the island to have no electricity or cellular/internet coverage and a sail boat at our disposal as well. We would do strolls on the beach under the moonlight and exercise in the morning to the rising sun. Skinny dip in the bay and just have a relaxing romantic time away from the world and just with each other
Leggs
December 10th, 2010
10:18 am
Good morning!
That sounds so so very nice, PR.
@2C ~ bummer!
abc
December 10th, 2010
10:18 am
I think things seem to be romantic to people because they take obvious time, effort and caring to make them happen. If one never does anything that can be perceived as romantic, then they probably don’t really care that much about the other person.
Sassy Me..14 days til MY birthday :-)
December 10th, 2010
10:18 am
What is the most romantic thing someone has ever done for you or with you?
I guess that would have to be when my ex decided to go all out for me one Valentine’s day…all out. Very nice..
Mr_NYC
December 10th, 2010
10:20 am
Flight on a private jet to some place with some nice sounding name ending in “ITI.” Private 100ft yacht to cruise for a long weekend in the Mediterranean and coast of Spain. A couple of tickets to attend the Oscars and black tie affairs during the event.
Rell- Black gold of the Sun
December 10th, 2010
10:20 am
I am very romantic when inspired or if i am with a romantic woman…its like i feed off her energy
Sassy Me..14 days til MY birthday :-)
December 10th, 2010
10:24 am
its like i feed off her energy
That sound niiice Rell…and from reading you I soo beleive it. I like that..
blue©
December 10th, 2010
10:26 am
Morning peoples….
@Mr_NYC – ending in ITI –
@Leggs – started the bday drinking yet? (you know us New Yorkers are alkis!)
most romantic experiences i would have to say for me have been like abc said, times where they obviously took time and effort, and thought to pull it off. i dont mean things like have FTD delivering flowers, or whisk me away on an expensive vacation, if you wow me with expense but its a prepackaged deal that you just had to fill out a card to get, not so much….
SlimNumeroUno - Independently Dependent ;-)
December 10th, 2010
10:28 am
2C – Not a romantic person AT ALL (slim now reviewing blog marriage license for any possible loopholes) lol
Purp – that definitely sounds romantic…just need to make sure we will have some form of HOT water.
I’m not exactly certain what I would do but it would more than likely be a combo of different things. I would have a messenger send my SO over an invitation from me that I will need him for X amount of time/days/weeks (of course it would be by his celebrity crush). I would then arrange for a car service to pick him up, take him to several destinations including a place to get some new wardrobe to fit our adventures…and at every location there would be another invitation or set of directions for him…Eventually, we’d probably end up somewhere overseas….first stop Amsterdamn. lolol On our final day there, I would slip out before he arose the next morning with only a letter from me stating our next adventure to where he’d meet me at some tropical place to a nice lunch/dinner setting close to the beach before we set sail off on a nice sized yacht w/our own chef…have a couples massage on deck…make love at every port…etc. And of course I’d be dressed so sexy-chic, smelling so dayum good….blah blah blah…something like that
abc
December 10th, 2010
10:29 am
Actually, pondering this is kind of a bummer. I can’t think of a single time anyone has ever done anything romantic for me, ever! Hm. Maybe they have and I’m just drawing a blank.
Raqi V
December 10th, 2010
10:29 am
Scratching 2CPTG off my list of possible next life mates. No romance
2CPTGIt’s funny that this is the topic today. I read Slim’s question to the menfolk yesterday and thinking back my memory lead me to the days after the hub and I became a confirmed duo. This was not really a romantic gestures but it impressed the hell out me.
He and I had talked on the phone one Friday evening confirming plans for that Saturday. I was just saying how busy my day was going to be and things I needed to get down before the evening of our outing. He came by the house that Saturday afternoon. Before he left he asked to see my car keys. I didn’t really think much of it because I was trying to get my boys ready to drop off at my parents.
About 10 minutes after he brought my keys back in I walked by the window and saw some strange guy messing around with my car. I went out to see who he was and what he was doing when I saw that he was washing my car. He said “boss man” told him to get my car “straight” for me. I had no idea who “boss man” was. LOL He told me it was Mase.
After getting over the wonderment of it all I was very impressed with him taking it upon himself to get one of my things to do that day out of the way for me.
While that was not a romantic gesture it definitely got him some that evening. LOL Not to say that he wouldn’t have gotten it had he not done that nice thing but doing it had me all giddy and feeling him in a major way. LOL
2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"
December 10th, 2010
10:35 am
Slim, and Raqi…..not saying I can’t be….just not all into it like that….
perhaps when I find what I what I truly want, then all that’ll change…..but right now, ain’t about to cast “pearls amongst swine”….
Purple Rain
December 10th, 2010
10:35 am
I am man enough to say that is the one issue I have with my wife, she is not romantic at all. Kind of brash even when I try to be with her. I agree with abc, thinking about this stuff is kind of a bummer. But her I still love her dearly.
Rell- Black gold of the Sun
December 10th, 2010
10:37 am
Romance like love people two..is very intimate. So yes the grandious stuff sounds nice..but some women value little things over big fantasy things..specially if they have no emotional base or positive experience to associate to your romantic actions…i think the most romantic thing i can do is
“listen”…i heard that was priceless…
Melo!!
December 10th, 2010
10:39 am
Romantic?
I have asked Queen to do one lil thang for me’ that I find romantic. Scared,timid….she won’t pull it off.
She literally slept in the can one time,as I went in all by myself.
Wear your sexiest mini and high boots,take me’ to the skrip, sit snugly by me’,your lil hands on my knees as I crouch forward making it rain on the girls!
Is that too much to ask on a wife?!
lil things,ladies,lil thangs!
good morning!
SlimNumeroUno - Independently Dependent ;-)
December 10th, 2010
10:40 am
Raqi – It is definitely the little things that get me too. I recall when I had in small talk convo, was saying how I couldn’t find me any Palmers Coco Butter sticks since I like to use it on my lips…a few days later, TheGuy had bought me two of them. It let me know that he thought of me as small of a guesture as that was. Or when we went hiking and I ended up getting a cramp in my foot…he carried me to the car. I had told him I heard that eating a banana helps with a charlie horse…we stopped by the store, he went to publix and I went to Bruesters for sweet treats. He came back with some bananas for me. Small things..
Purple Rain
December 10th, 2010
10:40 am
Rell, listen…to a woman…now that is pushing it. LOL just kidding, my problem with listening is distinguishing when I am supposed to say something and when I am not. I listen then offer my opinion, then she says I just wanted you to listen. Then when I listen on date say anything, she says I dont care. LOL, I just roll the dice every now and then and get it right. LOL
Luvbug
December 10th, 2010
10:40 am
If money was no object, what is the most romantic thing you could pull off?
A no baggage, year-long traveling excursion…a few toiletries, draws, a little currency, buying ready-to-wear clothing as we go, anything purchased mailed home safely, checking out the local areas, dining and entertainment, beaches and spas from time to time…52 places across the globe.
Melo!!
December 10th, 2010
10:40 am
Van not can
Sassy Me..14 days til MY birthday :-)
December 10th, 2010
10:42 am
dude u stoopid…
Luvbug
December 10th, 2010
10:42 am
I can’t think of a single time anyone has ever done anything romantic for me, ever!
abc- No cooking for you? ‘Special’ massage or pampering? Surprise gift? Nothing?
Purple Rain
December 10th, 2010
10:43 am
Melo, you are starting the Friday antics off early. I’m ready
SlimNumeroUno - Independently Dependent ;-)
December 10th, 2010
10:43 am
‘ain’t about to cast “pearls amongst swine”….’ —>
2C/abc/Purp – I’m such a thoughtful person that at times I feel bummed because a dude may not be on the level I am. I have to remember that I’m a woman and we tend to be a bit more thoughtful than you guys (sorry)…I like the SO to feel appreciated and special as much as possible but at the same time, I do like to receive that in return. Heyal, my ego could use a bit of stroking every now and then
Melo!!
December 10th, 2010
10:43 am
Really, stupid for that?
Silky Smooth
December 10th, 2010
10:43 am
what’s up good people?
Raqi V
December 10th, 2010
10:46 am
I am a woman that likes to be romanced and I like to treat my guy nicely also. I like to cuddle. Hold hands. You know just feely touchy stuff.
The most romantic things that he does for me is Candlelit bubble bath, Slow dancing in our bedroom and washing my hair for me.
He does other things like taking me out and stuff but those three I really like.
For him, I will give him a nice full body (rub) massage with soft music and dimmed lights. Haven’t done that in a minute though. Need to put that on the list of things to do real soon.
If money was not object what would I do or want him to do?????? I have nothing right now. Imma have to think about it for a while.
Melo!!
December 10th, 2010
10:48 am
A week end of romance?
we’ve done that…..
holding a eoman’s hand in public..
they like that
Purple Rain
December 10th, 2010
10:48 am
LOL
abc
December 10th, 2010
10:49 am
She cooks a couple of times a week, but I can’t say it’s romantic; we give each other massages all the time, every day, I guess to others it would seem romantic, but to us it’s just what we do. I’m just drawing a blank, is all. I’m sure that there must be some romantic stuff.
SlimNumeroUno - Independently Dependent ;-)
December 10th, 2010
10:49 am
‘So yes the grandious stuff sounds nice..but some women value little things over big fantasy things’
Rell – you are right, and i am one of those women..However, we’re discussing if Money or anything wasn’t an object. I would not want my SO to send me to some tropical place if he wasn’t going to be there too. I probably wouldn’t care where we went as long as we were together having a good time. Heyal, I’d be happy to go ice skating in Centennial park or to hear some spoken word or see Chris Tucker at the Fox for New Years eve lol
Sassy Me..14 days til MY birthday :-)
December 10th, 2010
10:49 am
‘Special’ massage or pampering?
I like to touch so a sensual massage is a must in my repertoire…but I don’t do it for just anybody I’m casually dating. A good deep tissue massage for him with a happy ending for errbody.
Silky Smooth
December 10th, 2010
10:52 am
2, say playa…you ain’t gotta explain why you’re not a romantic type; I know you ain’t built for that “square” love deal. Be content in who you are! I think it was ya boy Willie Dynamite who pulled ya coattail and said the “Huxtable” lifestyle ain’t for you. My sentiments exactly; In fact, I been told you it was only a matter of time before you “found your way home.” If you find true love, run with it! If not, there’s still some misguided, and misdirected applicants who could use your expertise!
SlimNumeroUno - Independently Dependent ;-)
December 10th, 2010
10:52 am
Question fellas: How do yall feel when a chick Does do some romantic, candles and rose petals, cut up fruit in the shape of a heart type guestures???? Do you really not care for it bc it may seem to be too soft of a look for you, or are you greatly surprised and appreciative of it?? Be honest
(would surprising you with two tickets to the Super Bowl be more on your romantic radar?) lol
Raqi V
December 10th, 2010
10:53 am
Slim, yeah those small things really matter and tend to touch deep for those like us.
Like Rell said the best thing couples can do for each other is listen because listening will help fulfill the true needs of our mates.
Amia
December 10th, 2010
10:54 am
I guess I’m not overly romantic. BUT I will say that I would be very impressed if a man would plan an extended vacation somewhere. I mean pack my stuff and tell me we are off for the weekend and have ALL planned. I’m cool after that. Oh yeah, it has to end in a swimming pool doing the do. I’ve never done that I want to so bad. These men are scurred.
Raqi V
December 10th, 2010
10:55 am
2CPTG, being that you are not one that does romantic gestures how have you dealt with women in the past that greeted you with a romantic evening or gesture? Do you squash it or go along with it to appease her?
Leggs
December 10th, 2010
10:55 am
@Melo ~ you’re kidding right! You are a hot mess!
@Raqi ~ that was sweet
@2C ~ lost some blog loves by admitting he’s not romantic (LOL).
Delight23 With Da Lysol Trigger Finger
December 10th, 2010
10:55 am
Bom dia peoples! I am very touchy-feely, and romance is a requirement. Most romantic thing? Errr…?? Most romantic NIGHT to date? An ex swept me up one Friday afternoon and took me to his place. I was worried all worried about my car beiing left in the parking deck. He was like I wanted to take you to dinner tonight, we’ll swing back downtown to get your car.
psssh. we got to house, he makes an excuse about placing a quick call so I should follow him in instead of waiting in the car. I get in and from the foyer to the dinning room he had candles and then he hit the remote and some jazz starting playing through out the house.
‘K this part is a little country, BUT, he makes the best greens on the planet, so he had spent the afternoon cooking for meeeeeee
he even started up the grill, had the wings already marinated, and some moscato chilling. I had mac n’ cheese w/whole wheat pasta, black eye peas w/smoked turkey. I am a key lime pie finatic. Homeboi ordered a pie from the key west key lime company. Chile! I was trying to give him some right there on the kitchen floor.
I’ll wrap up by saying that I was instructed to get comfortable and follow him to bath room where he lit some more candles whilst filling the bath for me. on the bed a big pretty pink stiped box. inside a full set including teddy, p’s, robe and floral garter.
I was cleansed, wined, dined and put to bed.
ALL OUT OF THE BLUE!!
Melo!!
December 10th, 2010
10:56 am
Candles?
don’t care for them, the mess up my allergies.
Super bowl tix? now u talking!
Slim,is my skrip desire outa place in your view..what u think Raqi?
Rell- Black gold of the Sun
December 10th, 2010
10:56 am
@purp…i have learned that you only offer advice when you get the deer in the head lights look..other than that just listen nod your head and say …..no that bench did not do that…lol
Delight23 With Da Lysol Trigger Finger
December 10th, 2010
10:56 am
blue©
December 10th, 2010
10:58 am
romantic – coming in while im in the tub, turnd off the lights and lit some candles instead, shoulder massage with a light convo, and washed my hair. not just quick and dirty, washing just to get clean, but took his time, with a nice scalp massage….made me putty in his hands at that point….
2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"
December 10th, 2010
11:00 am
Raqi, though I’m not “romantic”, I am very perceptive! I know how to please, and appease my interest…whether it be for the evening, or the long haul….if she greeted me in the way you described, oh, I’mma run it…
Nah, Leggs….ain’t lost nothin, sweetie….trust that!
What it do, Silky…..good to see you pop in…
Luvbug
December 10th, 2010
11:00 am
abc- Well dang. If those don’t count because they’re frequent, what types of things would?
Sassy Me..14 days til MY birthday :-)
December 10th, 2010
11:00 am
Chile! I was trying to give him some right there on the kitchen floor.
I KNOW that’s right!! What a nice gesture..
Rell- Black gold of the Sun
December 10th, 2010
11:01 am
@slim…dinner is nice…but the most romantic thing you can do for me is get me something or do something that align with my interest…like buying me an inspirational/self help book..I would go ape-shizzle like a kid on christmas…
its funny how women find direction in a man sexy or romantic..like take care of something for me in my life or tell me where we are going….hmmmm…but at the same time screaming i am an independent chick that runs her own life…hmmm….complex…
I can remember times when i spoke of “direction” i was blasted on this very blog…hmmm
Purple Rain
December 10th, 2010
11:02 am
Rell, LOL I will try that
Amia, gold dig much?
Slim, any kind gesture that she put thought into just for me would be well appreciated.
Delight23 With Da Lysol Trigger Finger
December 10th, 2010
11:03 am
Sassy Me..14 days til MY birthday
He was great at doing nice things just because. No hints need to be dropped or signals given. He was truly a romantic person and liked to do stuff like that. The event, as it became, was more than I expected and the little details like cooking the food the way I like it and special ordeing my desert. (((sigh)))
2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"
December 10th, 2010
11:04 am
“I can remember times when i spoke of “direction” i was blasted on this very blog…”
prolly from those that need it the most!