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Archive for December, 2010

I resolve to live it up!

It can be pretty profound hearing about “untimely” deaths and seeing really tragic events take place right at the end of the year. I’m normally pensive and reflective as it is, but when I take a moment to consider how life really is a journey, I begin to think about making the journey more meaningful.

Life is short. Life is beautiful. Life is precious. If anything this past year has taught me, its that you can plan all you want but sometimes you have to just enjoy life as it comes.

I resolve to focus less on what is missing because it takes away from appreciating what’s not missing.

I have a propensity to plan everything and I try to take small, calculated risks (Exciting, I know, it’s how I roll!) Throwing caution to the wind can actually be a fun thing (within reason?), so I would love to see what happens when I try it.

I can only make one dating resolution that I know has a high success rate: Have fun. That’s it. What about you? Do you think making resolutions …

Continue reading I resolve to live it up! »

Boomerang: When BAD dating karma finds you

I think every single woman needs a male friend. It’s one of the most enlightening relationships you can have because it gives you a chance to see men in a unfiltered, uncensored state. My guy friends are fairly candid with me about what they feel, how they deal, and the way they think. It has saved me a boatload of therapy to know them!

When they are going through a tough break up, I try to be supportive. I have seen them in their player days when they didn’t care so much about heartbreak they caused. I have also witnessed the moment when they realize that a female has “their nose wide open” and they are vulnerable for the first time ever.

This is when they get a little taste of what women go through. Men deal with breakups differently then we do but they definitely feel it as deeply as we do, especially when cheating was involved!

How do men deal with break-ups? From what I can tell, a lot of booze and sport fixation. They begin to meet as many women as possible to …

Continue reading Boomerang: When BAD dating karma finds you »

Naughty, nice, or somewhere in between

It’s almost time to say goodbye to 2010! I can’t believe how much difference one year makes. I have to say that I had moments of clarity. I have been naughty, nice, and then somewhere in between the two. Thankfully I don’t have many regrets and looking back over the past year, dating has been fairly pleasant!

How would you describe your dating misadventures and adventures this year? Naughty, nice, or a little in between? Have you thought about making any changes to your approach or attitude for 2011?

Is there something new you didn’t try that you are thinking of exploring? Maybe we can inspire one another to shake things up for the new year!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Blog

Continue reading Naughty, nice, or somewhere in between »

Where do you find the good guys?

One of the most common questions women ask me when they hear I write about dating is where are all the good men in Atlanta. As if I have the physical address to a magical man tree somewhere in the city that grows good men that you can just go grab off the vine. Good guys are everywhere!

I can’t guarantee that they are the type of men that will appeal to them (or vice versa). Who knows if that elusive chemistry will spark an interest or not. I just know that they are out there and you don’t have to look far.

The gym, recycle center, Trader Joes, churches, and records stores are pretty prime locations that have made me stop and think, “Ok, I must always look cute when I come here” because it’s crawling with the types I am drawn to. A lot of times women don’t realize that some of the best guys to date are already their friends!

When was the last time you were out somewhere and thought that it was hottie central?

I was hanging out in Smyrna at a wing place on karaoke night …

Continue reading Where do you find the good guys? »

Christmas gifts gone wrong

If you have met someone new and have contemplated buying a present for Christmas, I urge you to be mindful of what you choose. In some cases, it may even be better to not buy anything at all.

If you have known each other for a short time, a really nice date or special outing may be the way to go. I know some classy people decide to dump their potential relationships to avoid the gift exchange, but it doesn’t have to happen that way!

I have seen gift exchanges derail a new romance simply because the person didn’t know enough about their date. You can misjudge their humor or personal taste and come off looking like a jerk.

Guys, don’t give someone you just started dating lingerie. It’s just lose-lose and way too risky, it’s hard to live down a bad gift purchase like that!

What is the best and worst Christmas exchange you have had?

I can recall this one guy that gave me what I thought was drug paraphernalia but it turned out to be an odd shaped crystal piece. It’s always …

Continue reading Christmas gifts gone wrong »

Atlanta named most chivalrous city?

Good news everyone! The great folks at Dockers® sent me the following news release about our great city. Check it out!

Last week, in a light-hearted chivalry smack-down between five major cities– Atlanta, Chicago, Los Angeles, New York and San Francisco – a young woman or mature gentleman was staged in a high traffic pedestrian area in a state of distress, where they clearly struggled with heavy and toppling file boxes. Did anyone stop to help?

Indeed they did…and no one fared better than in Atlanta.

The results:

1) Atlanta proved to be the most chivalrous, with only up to 8 people passing our man or woman in distress before someone stopped.

2) Coming in second was Dockers’ hometown of San Francisco, with up to 17 people passing by before a chivalrous individual stopped to help

3) The third most chivalrous city was Chicago, with 20 passersby before help was offered

4) Fourth most chivalrous was Los Angeles, with 35 passersbys before someone took a moment to help

5) And in …

Continue reading Atlanta named most chivalrous city? »

Should you wait for a date?

You always hear dating advice to women about how men are supposed to pursue you when they are truly interested. We know that “when he’s into you” he will and then you will know that it’s real.

I don’t know if that is always the case though. A lot of men are laid back and take things slow because they don’t like to rush things. If you meet someone that you are interested in, how long should you wait to go out with them?

For some people, the process is: swap phone numbers; hold a few conversations on the phone to weed out the crazies or married people; text and/or email; add each other on Facebook; schedule a date. I have known at least three relationships that started this way. The date didn’t get set up right away at all.

Is there a time frame when a date should be scheduled? If someone hasn’t asked you out, do you move on right away and cut off communication?

How long do you usually wait to set up a date after you meet someone?

Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta …

Continue reading Should you wait for a date? »

Dating: Are you in the wrong relationship?

If you are having doubts about the person you are dating, does it mean you are in the wrong relationship? I ask because a couple of different people have told me that they want to end their relationship because of a few doubts they have.

One guy told me that he pursued a woman for months and thought he wanted to be exclusive with her. When the realized they had zero chemistry in the bedroom, suddenly she’s the wrong person for him.

Interestingly enough, a woman I know from yoga told me that she doubts her boyfriend is the one because he doesn’t show any affection whatsoever. She is the type that needs that from a relationship.

Do you think we have these ideas about what relationships should be about and bail out too fast when we don’t get it? Are you in the wrong relationship because they aren’t satisfying an important need?

How do you rank those needs in importance? What do you think you have to have in a relationship that would make you want to stick it out?

Wise Diva, …

Continue reading Dating: Are you in the wrong relationship? »

Invited to the mancave? Don’t blow it

I felt a little bad for laughing at my girl Laura’s misadventure at her new man’s crib last weekend. Laura has a really bad habit of snooping. We have talked about it before and I even told her to call or text me if she got the urge to go digging around. Alas, my pseudo aversion therapy trick didn’t work.

She snooped and now she wants to ask him questions about something she spotted. It’s not worth mentioning, in my opinion (something about female clothing that isn’t hers) but she is determined to “confront” him on it.

When you are invited to a man’s home, you don’t want to go in like some CSI team. You probably have reached the stage with him where he believes (hopes?) you aren’t psycho. Don’t pick that time to show your crazy, ladies!

Have you ever gone over to someone’s house and engaged in a little snooping? Do you think it was a smart move or a bad one?

How would you feel if your date saw something that was supposed to be private?

What is an acceptable amount of …

Continue reading Invited to the mancave? Don’t blow it »

Cheating pre-marriage a deal breaker?

I’ve noticed that a lot men that I have talked to about their exes who cheated on them rarely continue the relationship. It pretty much makes her off limits for anything more than hooking up. One guy even said that if she cheated before he even thought of marriage, she would probably do it again after marriage.

Do you believe that a person is not marriage material if they were unfaithful to you while you were dating? Is fair to hold that against a person who may have changed and learned from their mistakes?

Should cheating in marriage be compared to cheating on someone you are dating?

Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Blog

Continue reading Cheating pre-marriage a deal breaker? »